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geteven8.txt
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1991-01-28
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6KB
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253 lines
═┴─! ╨╥┼╙┼╬╘╙...
┴ ├OMMODORE ╦ID/╟REMLIN PRODUCTION!
╟ETTING ┼VEN
╨ART #8
┼VEN MORE DIRTY TRICKS.
╘HE FOLLOWING FILE IS FOR ENTERTAINMENT
PURPOSES ╧╬╠┘. ╔T IS NOT INTENDED FOR
SMALL CHILDREN OR THE MENTALLY
UNSTABLE.
**═┴─! ─╔╙├╠┴╔═┼╥**
╘HE AUTHOR(S) OF THIS FILE TAKE NO
RESPONSIBILITY FOR ANY OF ITS CONTENTS.
╫E ARE NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR ANY ILLEGAL
ACTIONS THAT TAKE PLACE AS A RESULT OF
THIS FILE.
┴LL OF THE FOLLOWING THINGS ARE TAKEN
FROM THE ╟ETTING ┼VEN SUBBOARD ON ╨├
═┴╔╬.
-═┴╙╙ ╘╥┴╬╙╔╘ BY ╘╚┼ ├╧══╧─╧╥┼ ╦╔─
┴ LARGE BAG FULL OF BEES, HORSEFLIES
MOTHS , OR CRICKETS PLACED OPEN ON A
SEAT WILL DO WONDERS FOR THE MORALE
OF PASSENGERS ON A BUS OR TRAIN.
╧BVIOUSLY, AT TIMES THE MOST EFFECTIVE
SCHEMES ARE HARDLY THAT AT ALL. ╘HEY
ARE JUST SIMPLE ACTIONS. ╞ILTHY ═C
╬ASTY SAYS ONE OF THE BEST WAYS TO
ATTACK A BUS OR AIRLINER IS TO GROSS
PEOPLE OUT. ╘HE SIMPLEST WAY TO DO
THIS IS TO VOMIT IN SUCH A WAY THAT
THE OTHER PASSENDERS CAN'T ESCAPE
SEEING OR HEARING YOUR ACT.
╔F YOU FEEL LIKE BEING A LITTLE
MORE SOPHISTICATED, HE SUGGESTS
YOU LET LOOSE SNEAKY SQUIRTS FROM
A ├╙ OR ├╬ "╘┼┴╥ ╟┴╙" PEN ON A BUS
OR TRAIN. ┴NOTHER OF ╞ILTHY ═C╬ASTYS
GOODIES FOR ═ASS ╘RANSIT VEHICLES IS
TO HOLLOW OUT A LIGHT BULB OR LARGE
├HRISTMAS ORNAMENT, THEN FILL IT
WITH THE STINKO SOLUTION OR GAS OF
YOUR CHOICE. ┼POXY SHUT THE OPENING,
AND PLACE THE STINK BOMB IN A PAPER
BAG. ╫HEN YOU HAVE SELECTED YOUR
TARGET AREA, PLACE THE BAG ON THE
FLOOR, OPEN THE TOP, THEN STOMP
ON THE BULB. EXIT THE BUS QUICKLY.
╘HIS ONE ALSO WORKS WILL IN THE OFFICE
GYM, PARTY, FUNERAL HOME, ECT.
-╘EACHERS BY ═IKE ╫INSLOW
╙YSOP OF THE ? 1 ┬┬╙ (313-941-5009)
╘ELL EM' ═┴─! SENT YA.
─ISLIKE A TEACHER AT SCHOOL? ╫ELL THEN
GET TO SCHOOL A LITTLE EARLY, ╫HEN NO
ONE IS LOOKING TAKE THE PINS OUT OF
THE HINGES TO THE CLASSROOM DOOR. ╔'VE
TRIED IT AND GOT GREAT RESULTS!
-╘┼┴├╚┼╥╙ ][ BY ─┼┴╘╚-╙╘┴╠╦┼╥
┼ARLY ONE MORNING BEFORE THEIR
TEACHER GOT TO THE CLASSROOM, SOME
STUDENT PAINTED A LARGE BLACK/BROWN
SPOT ON THE CEILING. ╫ITH SOME DEFT
ART TOUCHES, IT LOOKED AS IF A HUGE
HOLE HAD SUDDENLY BROKEN THROUGH.
THEY PILED BROKEN PLASTER, CEILING
WIRE, AND HUNKS OF LATHER ON THE
FLOOR BENEATH THE HOLE.
╘HE TEACHER WAS A FAG,AND WHEN HE
CAME IN AND SAW THE MESS HE PRANCED
OUT TO INFORM THE PRINCIPAL. ╤UICKLY,
THE STUDENTS CLEANED THE WATER PAINT
OFF THE CEILING AND SWEPT UP THE
FLOOR. THEY DISPOSED OF THE RESIDUE
AND TRASH ON THE ROOF OUTSIDE THE
ROOM.
╫HEN THE PRINCIPAL AND THE TEACHER
RETURNED, THE STUDENTS ACTED
INNOCENTLY CONCERNED ABOUT THE
TEACHER'S SANITY. THE PRINCIPAL ASKED
THE TEACHER TO PLEASE STOP IN AND SEE
HIM AT THE FIRST AVAILABLE MOMENT. ┴S
HE LEFT, THE PRINCIPAL STARED AT THE
TEACHER FOR A LONG, LONG TIME.
-┬ANKS BY ╙YNTAX ┼RROR
╙YSOP OF THE ╙YNTAX ┼RROR ┬┬╙
(313)-842-0323 ╘ELL EM' ═┴─! SENT
YA.
╟O TO THE BANK OF YOUR CHOICE AND
WRITE "╘HIS IS A STICKUP" ON THE BACK
OF THE DEPOSIT SLIPS. ╘HEN WAIT FOR
SOME UNLUCKY SOUL TO COME IN AND TRY
TO MAKE A DEPOSIT.
-═┴╔╠ BY ╙YNTAX ┼RROR
╘HERE'S ONE GOOD THING ABOUT THE
POST OFFICE. ╔T'S CALLED THE "├HANGE
OF ADDRESS" FORM. ┘OU SIMPLY WRITE
THE ADDRESS OF SOMEONE YOU DON'T LIKE
AND THEN PUT WHERE YOU WANT HIS MAIL
TO GO.
-╚╧╘ ╘╒┬╙ BY ╘╚┼ ├╧══╧─╧╥┼ ╦╔─
├AROLYN, A ╠┴ PUNK ROCKER, SAYS
SHE ONCE DUMPED FIVE POUNDS OF
FERTILIZER IN A SELF-STYLED
PLAYBOYS JACUZZI. ╘HE RESULTING
ODOR WAS QUITE VULGAR THROUGHOUT
THE ENTIRE APARTMENT COMPLEX.
═EL ├AJONES SAYS THAT SOMEONE ENTERING
A HOT TUB OR JACUZZI CONTAINING THIS
FERTILIZER BROTH IS QUITE LIKELY
TO GET NASTY SKIN BURNS
-┬ARF BY ╚╧╠╠┘ ╫╧╧─
╙YSOP OF THE ├OORPORATION ┬┬╙
(313)-284-0154 ╘ELL EM' ═┴─! SENT
YA!
═AD AT YOUR MOM? ╫ANT TO MAKE HER
GAG HER BRAINS OUT? ╚ERE'S A GREAT
RECIPE FOR FAKE BARF...
2 SLICES OF CHOPPED BOLOGNA
1 CHOPPED PICKLE
1 MASHED BANANA
1 TEAS. PEPPER
1/2 CUP OF WHATEVER YOU HAD FOR
DINNER, CHOPPED WELL
2 CUPS WATER
1/2 CUP FLOUR
1/2 CUP LEMON JUICE
═IX WELL, AND DEPOSIT THIS IN
THE MIDDLE OF THE KITCHEN FLOOR
WHILE MAKING WRETCHING NOICES.
╫ORKS EVERY TIME. ┴ND THE OLDER THIS
MIXTURE IS, THE WORSE (OR BETTER)
IT SMELLS.
-╠╧├╦┼╥╙ BY ┼┴╟╠┼╚┴╫╦
╙YSOP OF ╨├ ╚IGH (313)-388-6657 ╘ELL
EM' ═┴─! SENT YA.
╟OT SOMEONE AT SCHOOL YA DON'T LIKE OR
A LOCKER PARTNER YA HATE?
╫ELL TRY THIS ONE ON EM-
╘AKE A MEDIUM SIZED BAG, PREFERABLY
THIN PLASTIC, AND FILL IT WITH WHAT-
EVER YOU FEEL IS APPROPRIATE (FLOUR,
FAKE BARF, PING-PONG BALLS). ╒SING
STRONG TAPE, SECURE IT TO A SHELF OR
WALL IN HIS LOCKER, SO THAT IT IS IN
REACH OF THE DOOR. ╨UT A COATING OF
GOOD GLUE ON THE END, SO THAT IT
STICKS TO THE DOOR WHEN SHUT. ╫HEN
THE MARK OPENS THE DOOR, ╥╔╨, ╨╧╒╥!!
┘OUR MARK IS NOW COATED WITH (BARF,
FLOUR, PING PONG BALLS) UNDESIRABLE
GARBAGE.
╫RITTEN BY
----------
╘HE ├OMMODORE ╦ID AND THE ╟REMLIN
╫ITH ╚ELP ╞ROM
--------------
─EATH-╙TALKER, ╚OLLY ╫OOD, ═IKE
╫INSLOW, ┼AGLEHAWK, AND ╙YNTAX ┼RROR.
╘HIS FILE HAS BEEN A PRESENTATION OF...
═┴─! ┴╬┴╥├╚┘ ╔╬├.
╫╧╥╠─ ╚┼┴─╤╒┴╥╘┼╥╙-
╨├ ═┴╔╬- (313)-386-4698
╨├ ╥╧┘┴╠┼- (313)-281-6916
╨IRATE ╨ETE
├OMMODORE ╦ID
┬LACKBIRD
╙IR ╟ALLANT
─EATH-╙TALKER
╘HE ╟REMLIN
--─ON'T JUST GET EVEN, GET ═┴─!
-- ┼╬─ ╧╞ ╞╔╠┼ --
(├) 1985 ═┴─! ─ETROIT ─IVISION
11/28/85