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Internet Message Format | 1998-06-30 | 1MB

From: "Aurelia Destiny" <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Cloaked in Darkness:  Chapter 6/?
Date: 01 Jun 1998 08:22:24 PDT

TITLE: Cloaked In Darkness
AUTHOR: Princess Destiny ([e-mail])
SUMMARY: Things are not exactly what they seem when Giles finds an
ancient diary, with news of the death of the Slayer.  A new girl comes
to Sunnydale and things start to go crazy, Angel is jealous because
Buffy has a boyfriend and the Anointed one gets a nasty surprise...
It is naturally a Buffy/Angel Romance story, cause I'm a hopeless
romantic!
RATING: PG.
TIME PERIOD: Hmm, well since we have only seen up till Prophesy Girl
here in AustraliaBut I HAVE read the scripts for the rest of
them...Okay, just after Prophesy Girl and we'll leave it at that!
THANK-YOUS:
FEEDBACK: PLEASE!  I love to hear from people!
DISTRIBUTION: Ask me first, I'll say yes anyway, but I want to know
where it is going.
DISCLAIMER: Buffy, Angel and the others are the property of Joss Whedon.
Gabriella and any others I add later on are Mine, Mine, Mine!  This is
my first try at a Buffy fic so don't be too harsh, comments and
suggestions or even praise for my lovely story are very welcome!


              ************************
                CLOAKED IN DARKNESS
                  ************************


             Chapter 6: A Surprising Death


Buffy and the otherÆs raced towards "The BronzeÆ as fast as they could
and though Angel ran right next to Buffy, neither of them said a word
nor even looked the otherÆs way.  Willow and Xander had noticed and
exchanged looks constantly on the way, Xander again juggling his bottle
of holy water.  They had almost reached the nightclubÆs car park when
Buffy skidded on something and almost fell, she grabbed out and latched
onto AngelÆs arm automatically and then flushed and pulled away.

"Buff, whatÆs wrong...what the...hell"  Xander stumbled to a halt as the
street lightÆs and those from æThe BronzeÆ lit up the car park and they
could see what Buffy had slid on.  The whole area was cover in dust
about half-an-inch thick and Buffy and the otherÆs gaped in shock, no
doubt in their minds that this had been all the vampires that they had
run there to fight.

"Think theyÆre all here?"  Willow asked professionally and Buffy brushed
the hair back from her face in confusion and also fear.

"What could have killed them all in less than 20 minutes, there were 30
of them!"  she yelled and Angel put a calming hand on her shoulder, she
was so in shock that she didnÆt shrug it off and instead leaned slightly
into the warmth.  Angel scanned the area and spotted footprints almost
immediately, they were in the center of the dust and he walked over
curiously.

They were quite clear, the prints, boots by the look of it too, but that
could be anyone at all in Sunnydale.  Boots were æinÆ as he had heard
Buffy say, she had several pairs herself.  The strange thing was, the
prints were just there, there were no tracks leading to or from that
spot in the center of the car park.

"Weird"  Buffy murmured and he realized she had come up behind him, he
had been so distracted that he had not even heard her, vampire hearing
and all.  Angel suddenly felt an overwhelming urge to take her into his
arms but he fought it, she had told him to stay away from her and he
would, worse still, she had a boyfriend.

"You should go back and tell Giles, it looks as if you wonÆt be slaying
tonight"  Angel told her quietly and walked away without another word,
practically feeling her shock as she stared at his retreating back.  He
melted into the shadows and watched as they left, going back the way
they had come.  There was no sense in worrying her, but the only
creature who could leave no tracks to or from somewhere had to be a
vampire.

He could have leapt down from the roof to kill them and then leapt back
the same way, but why would a vampire kill his own kind?  And there were
some of them that could fly, very rare but Angel had seen some. Was
there another vampire around with a soul, a rogue like Angel bent on
stamping out the evil oneÆs.  But it still didnÆt explain how ONE
vampire could kill 30 of them in only 20 minutes...

******************************************

A cloaked figure watched Angel as he examined the dust from the shadows
and cursed itself for a fool for leaving tracks.  A wind suddenly sprang
up and swept over the car park, erasing the foot prints and the dust
that had been the vampires swirled away in a whirl wind, scattering it.
The figure saw Angel curse and then the vampire went into the club and
the figure sighed.

It had not been easy to kill them all, it had been totally against the
figureÆs nature to do it...but all those humanÆs would have suffered and
that was something the figure was not willing to risk.

***************************************

"Hello Angel"  a soft voice whispered into his ear and Angel started,
turning swiftly to meet deep green eyes.  Gabriella.  She was wearing a
long black dress and practically melted into the shadows with him and
Angel was surprised, not many could have seen him so hidden under the
stairs in æThe BronzeÆ as he had been.

"Gabriella, you startled me.  I didnÆt hear you"  he said with a smile
that was a slightly strained, he had been so intent on Buffy and Dwayne
dancing that she had managed to come upon him quite easily.  A smile
crossed her beautiful face and then Gabriella leaned past him to see
what he had been so intent on.

"Do you love her?"  she asked gently and Angel turned to her completely
shocked that she had seen what was buried deep in his heart.  He was
about to lie when he saw that there was a terrible sadness in her eyes,
something she turned away quickly to hide, but he had seen it.

"I...I guess I do"  Angel said slowly, wondering what could have caused
such a sadness in one so young as she was.

"That is beautiful Angel, you should fight for her"  Gabriella murmured,
turning back to watch Buffy and Dwayne end the dance and turn towards
the stairs.  They didnÆt see Gabriella or Angel in the shadows beneath
and continued up to the second floor where their table was.  Angel
sighed and turned to ask Gabriella if she wanted to take a walk, but she
was already gone.  He scanned the room swiftly, but there was no sign of
her and he felt something nagging at his mind.

"How did she leave so quickly?"  he wondered out loud as he walked out
from under the stairs and headed for the exit, hoping to see her
outside.  There was no sign of her in the car park and he found himself
wandering along the same road they had walked a 2 nights ago, when he
had first met her.

***************************************

Gabriella walked along the sidewalk slowly, staring again at the moon,
contemplating.  Her mind was on Angel and Buffy, wondering how she could
help them both.  She had seen how jealous Angel was when he saw Buffy
with Dwayne and she was sure that Buffy felt the same way.  The blonde
couldnÆt hide the way she sometimes looked around as if seeking someone
and a disappointment would enter her clear gaze as she saw that was she
wanted never came.

Gabriella knew what it was like to long for what you could not have, but
those two could have it if they just got past this fight of theirs. She
walked to the park that she had discovered when walking with Angel the
night she met him and she sat on a bench to stare at the sky. A slight
noise alerted her and she spun around to see a guy standing not far
away, smoking.
He eyed her thoughtfully for a moment and a smile crossed his face, a
sly smile that made her skin crawl.
"DonÆt be alarmed my dear, I assure you I donÆt bite"  the guy
practically purred and Gabriella watched him a moment longer before
nodding and sitting down again with her back to him.

"I am curious however to see that you are all alone, donÆt you have a
boyfriend?" he asked curiously as he came to sit beside her, she studied
him as he too looked up at the moon and saw that he appeared to be in
his early 20Æs.  His hair was down to his shoulders and it was a
red-brown colour, his eyes a deep brown.  He was also very handsome and
from the tilt of his head when he caught her staring at him, he was very
aware of his looks.

"No.  No boyfriend currently" she told him quietly, her chin lifted
slightly, challenging him to ask any more about her single status and he
closed his mouth with a twinkling in his eyes.

"The moon is beautiful tonight, isnÆt it?"  he said after a momentÆs
paused and Gabriella sighed, her eyes on the moon as she nodded her head
in agreement.

"Yes, she is"  Gabriella murmured and the guy clapped his hands once in
delight.

"Ah!  You belive in the goddess Seline then?"  he inquired and was
rewarded with a gentle smile, but something in her eyes disturbed him
greatly.

"Yes, I leant about her from...my sister.  She loved the moon also"
Gabriella said almost under her breath, but the guy caught it and he was
again curious.

"You have a sister?  And is she as lovely as you in the moonlight?"  he
teased her and Gabriella gave him a wry smile, telling him that she was
flattered but that it really meant nothing to her that he was trying to
get under her skin.

"What brings you out tonight?"  she asked and he drew in a breath,
turning to face her and in his eyes she saw a look of playfulness...and
a deep hunger.

"Food.  I was hungry"  he said flatly, his eyes went deadly intent and
she stared at him with confusion in her face.

"Oh, did I deter you from your dinner, I am sorry"  she apologized and
an evil smile spread over his face, but no fear entered her eyes as he
moved closer to her.

"On the contrary, I was just looking when I stumbled upon you.  I have
not yet eaten"  he said silkily, his eyes flashed yellow and then his
face changed hideously.  He expected her to run but she smiled sadly,
her hand coming up to touch one of the ridges on his face almost like a
child.

"I...I thought you were one of them"  she admitted hesitantly and the
vampire was confused, his hunger was great but something held him back ,
almost like an invisible force in his mind.

"Then why didnÆt you run?"  he demanded, grabbing her arms roughly and
she winced.

"I wanted to see..."  she began when she saw a blonde blur and realized
it was Buffy, sneaking up upon them from the side.


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-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "Jennifer M." <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Best Intentions 6/12
Date: 01 Jun 1998 10:13:10 PDT

TITLE: Best Intentions
AUTHOR: Jennifer M. ([e-mail])
SUMMARY: What would happen if Buffy's mom found her diary?
RATING: PG.
TIME PERIOD: Maybe past Becoming 1?
THANKYOUS:  Thanks Leslie S.!
FEEDBACK: Please!  Any constructive criticism would be greatly
appreciated.
DISTRIBUTION: Please ask.
DISCLAIMER: All characters are the property of Joss Whedon, et al.  The
idea is mine, though!
COMMENTS: Sorry for the delay... I've been extremely busy.  If you would
like anything posted up until now, just let me know, and I will E-mail
it to you.  Thanks for reading!

Best Intentions Part 6

"Mrs. Summers?"  Willow broke the silence.  "I know you're
thinking we're trying to cover for Buffy.  And-- we *have*
covered for her in the past.  And, I guess we are now, in a way.
Except we're doing it by telling you the exact truth about her.
It is hard to handle what she has to deal with.  To faceà  She
hasn't been able to share that with you and it has torn her apart
inside.  Believe me."  Willow stopped and looked down at her
hands again.  She still did not know what had happened to her
friend.  But, what ever it was, it had to be bad.  Even if that
was obvious!

"Willow, Xander, I appreciate that you are trying to help Buffy.
But-- Mr. Giles, you're her teacher.  How can you say these
things?" Giles stood up and began to pace in the small office.

"Mrs. Summers, I am Buffy's Watcher.  I was sent here to help
guide her, train her, help her.  I do what I can to prevent the
girl from getting herself killed.  It is not an easy task.  Your
daughter is quite, uh, headstrong."

"Yes, that is true," Joyce said and frowned.

"Mrs. Summers, if only you knew how strong your daughter is--,"
Xander explained.  "--If you could see her in actionà I know the
first time I saw her fight a vamp, I was amazed.  I thought people
could only fight like that on TV!  But there was little 'ol Buffy,
kicking this dead guy's butt!  It was incredible!" Joyce noticed
the admiration written all over his face.  "I'd never seen anything
like it.  And, time and time again, she has proven that she is the
strongest person that I know.  Not only because of her physical
strength, which is awesome, don't get me wrong.  But, because
of her emotional strength.  She has to live with her life-style.  She
had no choice, Mrs. Summers.  And-- really she's not supposed to
tell anyone."

"She's needed desperately here, in Sunnydale.  Not in some
institution where she can't even protect herself!"  Willow and
Xander's eyes opened in shock and they looked at each other.
Institution?  For crazy people?  Giles had a sudden look of panic
cross his face.  "Oh dear God.  If Angel finds out where she isà"

"She's as good as dead.  We need to get her out of there.  Now!"
Xander jumped off of the desk.

"Wait.  What do you mean if Angel finds out where she is?  He
can't get into the hospital.  It's past visitors hours," Joyce said.

"Mrs. Summers, Angel is a vampire.  He can do what ever he wants
to.  And, he wants Buffy dead," Willow told her.  "He wants her
dead!"  Willow jumped off of the desk, and joined Xander and
Giles at the door.

"Angel's a Vampire!?"  More confused than ever, Joyce stood up,
not yet willing to admit she was wrong.
~~~

______________________________________________________
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-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: [e-mail] (Ingrid E Stanton)
Subject: BUFFYFIC: DISCUSS: My horrible little problems again...
Date: 01 Jun 1998 13:27:28 EDT

Hello all.

I wish I could address you with much happier news,
but alas, the worst has happened. My evil, evil brother
crashed my computer, and all my files are gone,
including "Reunion" in its entirety. Needless to say, I'm
distraught (and homicidal, but that's another story).
Anyway, to get to the point, here are my requests:

1. If anyone has any spare parts of reunion floating
around in his/her mailbox, I'd be eternally greatful to
have them forwarded to me. I need the interludes
especially to write the ending.

2. There was someone who requested to post
parts of "Reunion" on his (or her) web page, and,
having lost all my mails, I don't have the URL. If
I could get it, whoever you are, that would be
wonderful!

3. If anybody knows a good assasin who works cheap...

-Ingrid

_____________________________________________________________________
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Get completely free e-mail from Juno at http://www.juno.com
Or call Juno at (800) 654-JUNO [654-5866]



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: "Truthfully" (1/1)
Date: 01 Jun 1998 14:40:29 EDT

Notes: From Cordelia's diary, short vignette piece, before the valentine's day
ep at least, possibly earlier. Just musings. ::sigh:: I was trying to wait
until I had something more finished before I posted this one, 'cause I like to
have at least one piece in storage in case I hit a dry spell, but most of the
stories I'm working on these days are longer ones so they aren't finishing as
easily as the short ones. So I should finish another one soon, I hope. Hope.
Distribution: Not without my permission, please.
Disclaimers: Standard ones apply.
Feedback: Yea! To [e-mail], please.

~

                          "Truthfully"

Dear Diary,

     This isn't happening, can't be happening. And yet somehow, it
is, because... I...
     Oh god. Xander. I, Cordelia Chase, am falling in--
falling...falling for? Yeah, that sounds right. I think. I hope
not. Ohgod. Xander Harris, the geek. The nerd. The dork. The guy I
have made a point out of avoiding since I was in what, third grade?
And now I'm in love with him? Hello, earth to Cordie, get a grip
and get off the train, the tracks are screwed up ahead and you're
gonna spin out of control.
     But it's true, is the thing, and I can't deny that, can I?
Being around him makes me feel better, makes me feel like I'm not
watching as much as I'm participating.
     But oh my god, it's Xander Harris. And that should make me
absolutely sick, shouldn't it? Shouldn't it? I'm not, is the thing.
I'm not sick at all, except sick with worry about what the guys are
going to do if they find out, when they find out, what will they
think, I mean, he's so completely uncool and yet...
     And yet he makes me feel like I'm worth something. Yeah, he
gives me a hard time and he makes fun, but when he tells me to wear
something "trashier," I don't feel like I already look like a slut
and he's serious. When he says it, it sounds like he's teasing, or
like he cares about me anyway, despite myself. Maybe because of
myself. I don't know. Do I even have a "self" for him to like? Or
am I that much of a sheep, that all I am is a carbon copy of
whatever's hot at the moment?
     This is never something I think about, and this is seriously
not something I'm sure that I'm comfortable thinking about as it
is. I feel like I should, well, I don't know, but not be this cool
with things the way they're going. I feel like I should be putting
up a fight, but I don't want to fight him.
     Even if I could get past the hard stuff, like whether or not
I actually feel like this, what would happen then? How would I ever
go from being Cordelia Chase, She Who Doesn't Care, to Cordelia
Chase in a loving and committed relationship? Can I do that? Or
would I screw up and find out that it's not that he cares about me,
it's that he cares about what he _thinks_ of me, and what other
people think of me, and it all turned out that I was a status
symbol all over again? That's the worst kind of relationship, too,
when the guy thinks he's using you and takes advantage of it, but
somehow I can't see Xander being like that in a lot of ways, even
if he was utterly uncool about things like how he dresses and how
he looks and the impressions he makes on people.
     I feel like this should be bothering me more than it is, which
bugs me because at the same time I don't like the idea that I've
always given in to other people's opinions of me and what I should
be and how I should look and how I should act, and why is it that
when I try to be something I'm not I can pull it off and yet if I
turn around and try to find out who I really am, everything about
me turns into a complete blank slate?
     What am I supposed to do about it, either way, anyway? I'm
sure he doesn't care about me at all. In fact, this probably is
going to turn out to be some sort of super-short phase we're both
passing through, where we feel like we need somebody and we're the
only ones there for each other. I mean, look at him and Willow.
They would be perfect. Or him and Buffy, he likes her way more than
he likes me and he's even said it on occasion.
     God, Cordelia, you're being such a blowhole, get a grip.
Nerdify a little less and be the person you know you are, and you
know, if you're not too stupid about things then maybe you'll wind
up having half a chance with a sweet guy like Xan-- No, no way in
hell am I gonna write that 'cause it's all pathetic and needy and
well, just plain pathetic. So it's not getting written. See me not
writing?
     I'm going to go get a drink of water. Maybe I'll write more
later, but it won't be about _him_ 'cause that's not something I
feel like writing about anymore.
     Ta for now,
          Cordie.

THE END

Copyright 1998
Rachel Brody

~

Comments to [e-mail], please.



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Undertow (1/1) by Blu
Date: 01 Jun 1998 15:04:02 EDT

Title: Undertow (1/1)
Author: Blu
Email: [e-mail]
Note: ok, I got inspired for this while listening to "Full Of Grace" over and
over and over... so you might put it on to get the mood...
Spoiler warning: Becoming (both)
Rating: PG
Content warning: Kissing, mostly. Buffy/Angel
Summary: ::makes zipping motion over her mouth:: can't really say...
Feedback: Very welcomed.  Critiques HIGHLY wished for, to the author (not the
list, please).
Disclaimer: All rights reserved for Joss Whedon, the WB, Mutant Enemy, etc.  I
used the characters for my own personal enjoyment and that of others, not for
profit.  None of these characters belong to me.  I have nothing, so don't
expect much if you decide to sue.  This story is my own creation, so rights to
it belong to me.  No copyright infringement intended.
'Nother note: I have changed my mind, and I'm not changing my Spike story,
Must Be the Weather, or adding a second part... sorry to disappoint all you
guys... but it's up at my site at
http://members.tripod.com/~IluvBuffy/fanfic.html.



  I found the Slayer huddled on a beach about forty miles from Sunnydale. A
beach the locals call "Loco". The reason being: rocks ranging from the size of
baseballs to the size of boulders litter it's expanse of sand, leaving little
room for anything else.

  The Slayer was sitting only steps from the waves, staring vacantly out to
the horizon. We shared the beach with one other family. The parents tossed a
football around with tier two sons. A picnic was spread on a blanket nearby.
The setting sun was casting a nice pink glow on everything. It gave the
Slayer's pallid face some color. When she finally looked up and acknowledged
me, her blue eyes were dull and pained. Her hair hung limply around her
shoulders.

  "What do you want now?" she asked in a monotone, averting her eyes. I
cautiously lowered myself onto the sand next to her. When I rested beside her,
she cast me a disparaging look with her tired eyes.

  "You know why I'm here," I told her, not quite meeting her gaze.

  She hugged her knees to her torso, and didn't reply.

  "You have to go back," I went on.

  "I don't HAVE to-"

  "They need you."

  "Yeah, well, so did Angel-"

  "But you still did it. Sent him to hell. Fulfilled your duty. Because you're
strong." I paused. "You CAN go on with your life."

  "Maybe I don't want to!" The Slayer's voice cracked. She stood up swiftly
and walked away, down to he water's edge. Buffy bent down and unlaced her
boots, then kicked them off. Her socks followed them a few paces from the
lapping waves. Buffy waded in up to her ankles. I rose and brushed at the
moist sand that clung to my clothes. Buffy turned and glanced at me.

  I could clearly see the tears tracing paths down her cheeks. She stood
between me and the sun and it cast a gold glow around her silhouette. My eyes
strayed from the Slayer to and object bobbing hysterically up and down in the
water about two hundred yards from shore.

  I gulped.

  It was one of the children. His mom shrieked and lunged forward into the
oncoming surf. I knew she would never reach him in time to save him.

  Meanwhile, Buffy had whirled around and caught sight of the boy. Without
pausing, she leapt into action. She ran as far out as her legs would take her,
then dove under a wave and began her version of the 'lifeguard swimstroke'. I
watched in awe as Buffy drew closer and closer to the flailing boy. She
reached him and he threw his arms around her neck, putting her in a chokehold.
She said something to him and he shifted until she was giving him a piggyback
ride. I could tell when she hit the strong part of the undertow; she sank a
little bit and changed her course.

  In minutes, the Slayer had reached dry ground. She carried the small boy to
his parents, who thanked her profusely. Buffy trudged back over toward me. She
was dripping wet.

  Buffy allowed me to drape a towel over her shoulders. She shivered in the
twilight air.

  "I see you still have the rescue gene," I commented softly, not expecting
the Slayer's smile when it appeared.

  I set about building a fire from driftwood. The family that we had
previously shared the beach with had piled into a green minivan and left.
Driftwood wasn't hard to come by, an amazing amount of it was caught between
the rocks on the beach. I used a Bic lighter to set my pile of wood on fire.
Buffy seemed drawn to the flames like a moth to a bright window. She sat close
to it, Indian-style. I promptly sat down across from her. The flames licked up
the salty wood, reflecting off of the Slayer's face, making it glow. I simply
watched her, willing her to make the right decision. She looked up into my
eyes.

  "I do miss them," she said. I tried my best not to see the pain in her eyes.
And I knew she wasn't only talking about her friends.

  I sighed heavily. I closed my world-weary eyes and concentrated on focusing
all of my mental powers on the one thing that would comfort the Slayer: Angel.
I momentarily lost my sense of time. I felt like I was falling. Drifting on a
pitch black sea of nothingness. Intense heat waves battered my body.

  I came into contact with a presence I would know anywhere.

  "What in-" the Demon with the face of an Angel began to berate me.

  "Buffy." The moment I said her name, he stopped speaking. "She needs to see
you. Trust me, one last time." He did, I could sense it, and I stepped back
from my body and watched from a distance of a few feet.

  The Slayer was staring at my body, now on her knees next to me. She shook my
shoulder, but my eyes remained closed. They slowly opened. She sat back on her
heels, then fell over backwards when my face changed into that of the one
person who could heal all of her troubles with a smile. And he did smile, a
little.

  "Angel? What-" Buffy broke off without finishing her thought. Angel's form
glimmered a little as he reached out and touched her face.

  Buffy tried again to speak. "How?" she whispered. A wind kicked up and began
playing with her hair, tossing it about.

  "Whistler," Angel said with a half-smile. He brushed at Buffy's hair. He
couldn't seem to resist. He tugged her into his arms.

  Buffy turned her face into his shoulder. Her tears began to flow. "Angel,
I'm sor-" He cut her off with a kiss. She broke away from the kiss trying to
speak: "I had no choice-"   but again he interrupted her with a kiss. "I
didn't mean it-"

  "Buffy!" Angel's hands at her shoulders cut off her monologue, midsentence.
"I KNOW." She looked up into his face and saw only love and sadness. She
choked on a sob.

  "I wish-"

  "I KNOW." His soft words started healing the hole in her heart. It would
never mend completely, she knew, but this would help immensely.

  Buffy leaned into Angel's chest and let all the tears and frustrations and
pain flow out of her system.

  "You DO have to go back," Angel said into the top of her head. He placed a
tiny kiss on her scalp, then rested his chin on the same spot.

  "I know," Buffy mumbled.

  "And so do I."

  Buffy nodded, her tears drying up.

  "When?" she asked, not wanting to know the answer.

  "Soon."

  "I love you." Buffy looked up and found Angel's gaze resting soberly on her.

  "I love you." Angel began to shimmer, and Buffy knew their time was short.
She pulled Angel's head down to hers for one last kiss. When they broke apart,
he smiled until his body faded away, leaving only me slumped on the sand.

  Buffy wiped away all traces of her tears. I opened my eyes, blinking at the
pain.

  "How was it?" I asked, with a teasing smile.

  Buffy grinned at me, helped me sit up. "I'm ready," she told me with a proud
smile.

  I nodded and looked past her to the ocean, where I caught one last glimpse
of a shimmering figure. "We'll miss you," I whispered into the night.

The End.

Remember, FB!
***
Blu ([e-mail])
"When ideas fail, words come in very handy." - Goethe (1749-1832)



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: "Hell" 2/?
Date: 01 Jun 1998 19:00:21 EDT

"Hell" 2/?
by Jaclyn Amy

TITLE: Hell
AUTHOR: Jaclyn [e-mail]
DISCLAIMER: I do not own any of the characters from Buffy the Vampire Slayer.
They belong to Joss Wheden, Mutant Enemy, 20th Century Fox, etc.
RATING: PG-13
WARNING: Some of the scenes have some gory violence. If you donÆt like that
sort of thing, donÆt read this.
SPOILERS: None.
SUMMARY: This takes place immediately after Becoming Parts 1 and 2. ItÆs
pretty much my own episode after this. Enjoy!
DISTRIBUTION: Ask me first.
FEEDBACK: Please!
AUTHORÆS NOTE: I have finals to study for, so these will probably come out
sparatically.
*****
    "WhatÆs going on, Giles? WhyÆd you call us out of first to be here?" Willow
asked nervously. She and Oz were sitting at the table while Cordelia and
Xander were groping by Giles office.
    "Damnit, Xander, Cordelia," he cursed. "We have more important things to be
doing."
    "Chill, G-man," Xander said as he led Cordelia to join the others.
    "IÆm sorry, but something terrible happened," he apologized.
    "You got that right," a voice said. A well-dressed man casually strolled into
the library.
    "Excuse me," Giles started, "but the sign on the door says-"
    "I had figured my man Angel was here to stop Akathla, not to bring him forth.
Boy, I was wrong." He walked closer to the table. "She went to him. She tried
to stop him for you." He stared at Willow. "The curse worked but after Angel
pulled the sword out. She had to kill him; not Angelus, but Angel. And she
did. You trained her well."
    "Ohmigod," Willow whispered to herself, "how could she have after Xander told
herà?" Xander looked away, sick with guilt.
    "Who are you?" Cordelia asked.
    "They call me the Whistler," he answered.
    Giles asked bitterly, "What do you want?"
    "She took off. You have to find her before itÆs too late. If she doesnÆt come
backà"
    "How do you know about her?" Giles asked.
    "IÆm an immortal demon sent to help her. I tried to warn her, but it was too
late."
    Willow spoke, "Where is she? WeÆve got to find her."
    "I canÆt tell you; I really wish I could. All I can say is that sheÆs staying
with a friend. You have to find her before you lose her forever. She canÆt
handle another loss. She canÆt handle losing him, too."
*****
    "Good morning," Pike said to a sleepy Buffy.
    Groggily, Buffy dragged herself off the bed. Pike had generously offered it
to her while he slept on the couch. The sunlight shined through the blinds as
she looked at the clock. "8:45. I probably would be in the library talking to
Giles about some prophesy or in math with Xander passing notes. I miss them so
much."
    "So go back. You should be with your friends at school having a normal life."
    "I canÆt go back."
    "Buffy-"
    "You donÆt know the whole story. The police came just as I arrived at the
crime scene. When they tried to arrest me, I hit the cop and went free. They
probably have a warrant for my arrest by now. As I came home, I saved my
mother from a vampire and told her I was the Slayer. She wanted me to explain,
but I didnÆt have time. She told me that if I walked out of the house I canÆt
come back. I had to leave. When I went back to the school to get the sword,
the principal found me and expelled me. I canÆt go back after that."
    He took a deep breath. "Fine, but at least call them."
    "I canÆt do that."
    "How would you feel if one of them took off, not saying a word if they were
alive, if they were healthy, if they had a place to live."
"Alright." Buffy got out of bed and went to the phone. She slowly dialed the
numbers to the school library.
    "Hello?" Willow answered.
    "Will?" Buffy asked cautiously.
    "Buffy? God, are you all right?" Tears of joy started flowing down her
cheeks. Suddenly anger filled her voice. "How could you have just-"
    "Willow, IÆm fine. IÆm sorry I left, but I couldnÆt stay. Not after I killed
Angel."
    There was a moment of silence as she swallowed the lump in her throat.
"Buffy, where are you?"
    "I donÆt want you looking for me."
    "You have to come back. Everyone was-"
    "Will?"
    Buffy heard Principal SnyderÆs voice in the background. "Is that Buffy
Summers you are talking to?"
    "No," she lied. "ItÆs my mom. Well, IÆve got to go," she spoke to Buffy. "I
hope you come home from your vacation soon."
    "Give me the phone," he ordered. "WeÆll find you," he sneered. "YouÆre in way
over your head, missy. And I sugest you donÆt make anymore calls here." With
that, he hung up the phone.
*****
    "Enjoying your visit?"
    All Angel could do was mumble a sound. Though he hadnÆt been physically
tortured, his memories were killing him painfully. //God, damnit,// he
thought. //I have to get out of here.// Of course there was the obvious stake
through the heart thing, but he wanted to be with Buffy.
    "IÆm glad," the Buffy look-alike stepped over to where he was leaning against
a wall. She gently rubbed her hand against the side of his unshaven face.
Before his eyes, she turned into Drusilla.
    "Dru, what-"
    "Shhh," she whispered. "Look at me." Buffy/Dru took her two fingers and put
them to her eyes. "Be in my eyes. Be in me." She gently covered his eyes with
her hand. "See with your soul."
    When he opened his eyes, he was looking at Jenny Calender. She ran into him
and sank to the ground. He held her up, unable to control himself. "Sorry,
Jenny, this is where you get off."
    With a twist of the neck, she was dead. "I never get tired of doing that."
//No,// his soul cried. //Jennyà// the vision was over as soon as it came.
    Now, instead of being at the school, he was watching through the window into
BuffyÆs house.
    "Hey, Giles," suddenly BuffyÆs smile faded as she handed the phone to Willow
and slumped on the floor.
    "What?! No, no!" Willow cried as she hung up the phone.
    More than anything Angel wanted to take back that moment, to not remember the
pain, or at least not to remember feeling pleasure from it.
    Buffy/Dru removed her hand, and Angel was back. She morphed back to looking
like Buffy. Tears ran down his cheeks as she gave him an ice cold stare.
    "Upset now?" she asked, tears started streaming down her face. "Good, keep
suffering. Know what itÆs like to lose everything that you ever cared about."
    He knew this wasnÆt the real Buffy talking, but the words felt as horrible as
if the real Buffy was saying them. //Someday,// he thought, //somedayà//
***
End Part 2



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: [e-mail] (Connie)
Subject: BUFFYFIC: "Angelus's Scary Adventure [1/1]
Date: 01 Jun 1998 17:06:07 -0700

Title: Angelus's Scary Adventure [1/1]
Author: Connie Somerville Kotkin
E-mail: [e-mail]

Disclaimer: Angelus and Drusilla belong to Joss, Mutant Enemy and the WB.
CJ belongs to me.

Rating: PG-13

Distribution: Anyone who wants it, just let me know.
Feedback: Please. I love getting e-mail.

Spoilers: I Only Have Eyes For You

Summary: The title pretty much says it all.

Author's Note:
I wrote this after having a week long Buffy-fest with my mother. I have
always thought that evil Angel was a wuss and re-watching the episodes
where he was bad just reconfirmed that idea. So I wrote this story as a
reflection of that for fun. Of course I am sure this could never have
happened on the show, but this is my story and I can do as I please. If
people can write stories with Angel and Willow being in love, then I can
write a story about Angelus being tortured by a 4 year old. Let me know
what you think.



From "I Only Have Eyes For You"

   Angelus:  (walks back) Let's get outta here. I need a real vile kill
before sunup to wipe this crap out of my system.

   He pulls on his jacket over his still unbuttoned shirt. Drusilla comes
up to him and growls. He snarls back.

   Drusilla: Of course. We'll find you a nice toddler. (snarls)




And so our story begins....


Angelus's Scary Adventure
by Connie S. Kotkin

        Drusilla, true to her word took Angelus to the local orphanage. It
was late and the sun would be coming soon. She figured (if she could use
her mind and had any sane thoughts) that this would be the fastest place
for her Angel to purify himself.

        They walked in since an orphanage was opened to everyone. Angelus
turned and looked at Drusilla. "This is exactly what I need. An easy
killing spree." He grinned at her "Let the fun begin!"

        Drusilla laughed as the walked up the stairs to find some young ones.

     ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

        CJ wasn't tired. She knew that she should be asleep but she didn't
want to. She knew that if the big lady found out she was up she would get
in trouble but she just could not stay in bed. She grabbed her teddy bear
and her special dagger that her parents gave her and walked towards the
stairs.

        CJ was going to escape tonight. She knew she was little and might
not get far but she would try like her parents had taught her to do. She
was going to go find some nice people to live with, not wait for them to
come to her.

        As she reached the stairs she heard the sound of someone coming up.
A man and a woman She looked for a place to hide and could not find one.
Before she could decide what to do the woman looked up and smiled at her.

        "My Angel, look at what I see." the woman said. CJ thought the
woman was pretty but her voice was strange. The man looked up and smiled at
her.

        "Well what do we have here? Aren't you supposed to be asleep little
girl?"

        The man and woman walked up to CJ and knelt on the floor in front
of her. She did not like them, she knew they were not supposed to be here
and that they were bad.

        "You're BAAAAD people. I don't like you." CJ said to them.

        The man laughed at that. "Aren't you precious. My name is Angel and
this is Drusilla. Who are you?"

        "You are not Angel, your Angelus, Angel is nice." CJ said and set
her teddy bear down. She held her dagger in front of her. She had heard the
name Drusilla before, her mother had talked about her and a spike. They
were Real BAD people.

        "That's right, I am not and Angel. I'm a demon." his face changed
and CJ laughed.

        "You don't look like a demon, you are silly vampire." She ran up to
him and stabbed him with her dagger. She heard him scream out in pain as
she turned away from him.

        "That was not very nice little girl. Miss Edith does not like bad
little girls," the woman said as she reached out for CJ. CJ stabbed at her
and decided that she wanted to play a game with them. They were vampires
like her parents had told her about. Vampires killed her parents because
her mother was a Slayer. She decided to
hurt them the way they had hurt her.

        She picked up her teddy bear and ran towards her room. She knew
they would follow her because her mother told her that vampires always
chased people who they thought were weaker when they had hurt them. She
looked over her shoulder and watched Angleus hold the silly lady as she
screamed over the wound she gave her. It was not even that bad. That lady
was a real baby, CJ thought. She was going to make them pay for killing her
parents, to do what her mother had taught her to do.

        ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

        Angelus could not believe the nerve of the little girl. She showed
no fear when he showed her his true face, she just laughed at him and
stabbed him with her dagger in the side. It had hurt, a lot. Then she had
gone and stabbed Dru in the stomach and now she was running into another
room, not running for her life, but running like she had no care in the
world. The little girl was just what he needed to take his mind off of what
had happened earlier tonight with the slayer. He turned back to Dru and
sighed. Sometimes she was a real pain.

        "Drusilla go back to the house and get better. Tomorrow night I
will take you out for a real treat."

        "But what about the girl?"

        "Don't worry about her, I will take care of her."

        Drusilla grinned at him and laughed. "Oh you are going to hurt her.
I like it, will you tell me about it when you get back?"

        "You know I will. Let Spike take care of you, make him feel
useful." He watched as she walked down the steps and walked to the room the
little girl had gone into. It was pitch black and he could see no hint of
the girl.

        "I know you are in here. Come out come out where ever you are," he
softly sung. He heard a noise behind him and walked over to the closet. He
grinned as he pulled it open. He walked in and looked around. There was
just clothes and other toys in it. He heard a sound and turned around and
saw the brown eyes of the girl staring at him. She stood in the room, in
front of the bed holding her black teddy bear.

        "There you are. I see you like to play games, well here is one for
you." He started to walk out of the closet when his feet started to burn.
He jumped back in pain. "What the hell is this?" He tried to walk out again
and felt the pain and moved back.

        The little girl continued to stare at him while he tried to get
out. "My mommy told me that vampires did not like God water. She gave me
some."

        "What are you planning to do to me little girl? This won't hold me
back for long."

        "No, this will." She walked over to her bed and jumped on it. Next
to it was a window, she pulled on the curtain and opened it, the room
slowly began to lighten up. "Morning is coming. Sun make vampire go
'bye-bye.'"

        Angelus was worried, this was not your typical toddler, she knew
things that most people did not know.

        "How old are you?"

        "I just turned 4."

        "What are you going to do with me?" he asked. He was starting to
get scared. The sun was starting to come up in the sky and he could feel
the rays on his skin. The window was directly in front of him and there was
nowhere for him to hide from the sun.

        "Vampires killed by mommy cause she killed them. I'm gonna make you
pay for that." She walked up to the door and threw some holy water at him.
He shrieked as it hit his face. She closed the door and Angelus knew he was
in for a long wait.

        ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

        CJ went back in bed and went to sleep. A couple of hours later the
nice lady came in to wake her up. It was 9 o'clock and she got out of bed
and went to her closet. The sunlight streamed through her room onto her
closet. She knew that when she opened it the light would hurt Angelus. She
opened it and watched as he tried to hide in the corner, away from the sun.
She laughed at him.

        "I am gonna watch t.v. What do you wanna watch?"

        "I don't want to watch television you brat. Just wait till I get
out of here. You will regret this."

        "You won't hurt me, your a big baby. Angel told me so."

        "What are you talking about, I am Angel."

        "Na-uh, Angel is floating in heather, he told me all about you." CJ
sat on her bed and put her dress on. Then she turned around to watch t.v.

        "You can talk to Angel's soul?"

        CJ nodded her head. "He is very nice and not a baby like you are.
He is gonna come back soon. Barney is on so be quiet or I will throw more
water on you." CJ grabbed her teddy bear and started to sing along with the
song.

        "I love you,
        you love me,
        We're a happy family with a great big hug and a
kiss from me to you,
        won't you say you love me too."


        Angelus groaned. This was worse than any torture he had ever
devised for Dru. He hoped he could last the day. As soon as night came he
was going to enjoy killing this little girl.

        ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

        CJ spent all day in her room with Angelus. She left the closet door
open until Angelus's clothes had started to smoke and he begged her to
close the door. She closed it a little bit but made sure that the sun still
affected him. When she got bored with TV she decided that she wanted to
play with Angelus. No one ever played with her since her mother had died.
What to play though. She looked under her bed and saw Candyland. She walked
to the closet and put it down. Then she went and got her mother's special
stick. She sat down in front of her closet and set up the game. Angelus
looked up at her. Sweat was running down his face and part of his skin was
blistered.

        "What are you doing now?" he asked.

        "We are going to play Candyland."

        He tried to snarl at her. "I am not going to be playing any game
with you."

        She picked up her mother's stick and poked him on the arm, he sat
up and yelled out in pain. He looked down at his arm, there was a big hole
and blood was flowing out. He could feel himself getting weaker. "This is
my mom's special stick, the wounds take a long time to heal. What color do
you want to be?" she asked as she held her stick.

        Angelus chose red and they spent the rest of the afternoon playing
games. Angelus was going crazy, he could not stand all of the cute games
she made him play. When she pulled out her Barbies and gave him one he
tried to leave.

        CJ stood up and opened the door and Angleus felt the sun's rays
burn his skin. He screamed in pain and sat back down again and started
dressing the Barbie. When she finally got up he thought his torture was
finally over until he heard the music she had put on. It was the Spice
Girls.

        "Tell me what you want,
         what you really really want"

        He knew what he wanted, he wanted this torture to be over. He did
not think that he would be able to last till sundown. He knew he wouldn't.

        It was only 3.

        ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

        CJ was having fun. She was learning all kinds of things about
Angelus and his life. She kept asking him questions over and over again
until he screamed at her. If he did not answer her she let the sun hit him
and watched him scream in pain, then she would stab him with her mother's
special stick. He had a lot of holes on his body to go with the burns on
his body.

        She could tell that she was driving him crazy and she was happy. He
deserved it. She could hear Angel laughing and laughed with him. As it grew
closer to her bed time and the sun was get ready to set she had him read
her stories. She knew he would hate doing it. She made him read "The
Velveteen Rabbit", "Green Eggs and Ham", "The Little Train That Could",
"See Spot Run", and
"Sweet Valley Kids" books.

        After he had finished that, he was begging her to stop and let him
go. She said she would only if he promised to never come near the orphanage
again. He said he would, and by this time he was babbling like an idiot. As
she stood up and walked to him he cringed as far away from her as he could
get. He did not want to be hurt again. She asked for his sword necklace and
he took it off and tossed it to her. She put it on and smiled. Angel was
happy too since he said she could have it.

        She went and got one of the older boys that liked her. She told him
that a crazy guy had come into her room. He grabbed Angelus who was a mess
and took him down the stairs and dumped him outside. CJ stood over him as
the last ray of the sun went away.

        "Don't come back or bring any friends or I will hurt you more. I
know where you live."

        Angelus nodded his head. As she turned to leave Angelus called out.
"What is your name?"

        "I am CJ. Thank you for playing with me, it was fun." CJ turned and
skipped back inside.

        Angelus stood staring after her. He was never going to come near
this place again. He had never been so scared in his entire existence. CJ
was the master of torture and mind games. He did not want to see what she
would turn into when she got older. He rolled towards the sewer and away
from the terror that had gripped him this last day.

        So ends Angelus's Scary Adventure.







-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: DISCUSS: Question regarding the Codex
Date: 01 Jun 1998 20:17:44 EDT

Does anyone know what language the Pagamon Codex was originally in?



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: David Williams <[e-mail]>
Subject: Re: BUFFYFIC: DISCUSS: Question regarding the Codex
Date: 01 Jun 1998 20:23:54 -0400

At 08:17 PM 6/1/98 , [e-mail] wrote:
>Does anyone know what language the Pagamon Codex was originally in?

Pergamum; it's a city in Asia Minor (or was). And it was in classical
Greek, because Giles was reading it aloud in the original and then
translating.

--
David Williams <[e-mail]>
Dept. of Theology, Boston College
That tagline is TRUE -> <- That tagline is FALSE



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Discuss: Angel's Scary Adventure
Date: 01 Jun 1998 21:01:39 EDT

Sorry to mail this to the whole list, but it bounced from the author's address
and I'm hoping they see it here instead...I loved the story, was laughing so
hard i was crying, and if you'v ewritten anything else may I see it? (Please
excuse the typos, BAD wrists today...)



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: Dreamscape <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Help Me Understand 1/1 by Dreamscape205
Date: 01 Jun 1998 23:10:01 -0400

TITLE:  Help Me Understand
AUTHOR:  Dreamscape205
EMAIL:  [e-mail]
DISTRIBUTION:  Anya, I'll submit it directly through the Slayer's
Fanfic site.  Anyone else, it's okay as long as you give me credit,
and email me with the URL I can find it archived.
SUMMARY:  The gang try to deal with Buffy's absence
RATING:  PG
TYPE: TB
SPOILERS: Becoming II
DISCLAIMER:  BtVS and its character's belong to Joss "The Torturer"
Whedon, the WB, Fox, and Mutant Enemy.  No infringements intended!


*************
Help Me Understand

She sat alone in the living room, staring straight ahead.  Not
looking at anything, but looking through them.  How long had she
been like this?  For days, at least.

Her hair hung in an unclean, string mass.  Her makeup streaked
by tears and running mascara.  Her clothes unkempt and wrinkled.
In her left hand, she clutched a single sheet of paper.  It had the
look of being crumpled, straightened, folded and then unfolded
many times.

She was startled by an unexpected knock at the door.  She was
tempted to ignore it, but there was the hope of some news.  Joyce
Summers stood slowly, every muscle in her body screaming from
the stiffness that developed after endless hours of sitting without
movement.

When she reached the door, her first impulse was to scream with
rage to leave her alone.  Instead, she calmly opened the door and
welcomed Mr. Giles, Xander Harris, Cordelia Chase, Willow
Rosenberg and her friend, Oz, into her home.

They all stood nervously watching her.  She felt as if she was on
display.  "What is it?  Has there been any word?"  she asked
anxiously.

"Word?"  Giles asked in confusion.

Her voice contained the suggestion of slightest hope, "Yes, have
you heard from Buffy?"

Giles shook his head, "Actually, Mrs. Summers, we came here
looking for her."

Joyce's eyes filled with tears and her chin quivered.  She held out
the crumpled piece of paper to Giles, "Please....help me
understand."

Giles quickly read the note then handed it to Willow as he pulled
Joyce into the circle of his arms.  There was no doubt this woman
needed his comfort...anyone's comfort.

Willow recognized Buffy's handwriting and began reading the note
aloud.  "Mom, I know you lashed out because you can't
comprehend what it is that I have become.  Believe me, I
understand.  Trust in the fact that anything I have done has been
for the good of mankind.  I never meant to hurt you.  I am
leaving...not because I want to, but because I need to.  The things
I had to do today to save the world have cost me more than I
thought I had to give.  There's an open wound where my heart is
suppose to be, and I don't think it will ever heal.  I don't know
when...or if...I'll be back.  Please go on without me.  You're better
off without me, for all the trouble I've been.  I'm sorry.  If there
is
one thing I am...it's sorry.  Sorry for caring...sorry for
living...sorry
for loving.   Buffy"

Willow looked up through tear-filled eyes to see the same in every
face in the room.  Even Oz, who although fond of Buffy, hadn't had the
time to develop a close relationship with her.

Joyce sobbed against Giles chest, "Why?  Why Buffy?"

Giles pulled away from Joyce, lead her to the couch, and sat her
down.  "There is no answer.  She is The Chosen One.  The one
girl in all the world with the strength to fight the vampires.
There's
no rhyme or reason...it just *is*."

"And I'm just supposed to accept and understand that some
mystical force chose my daughter to risk her life everyday because
'they say so'?"  Her anger was beginning to surface.  "And, just
what is your role in this?  I often wondered why you had such an
interest in my daughter."

"I am her Watcher.  It is my duty to train her, to prepare her for
what lies ahead."  Giles was ready for the volcano to erupt within
Joyce.  He was shocked by the calm reaction to his statement.

"So, then, as her Watcher, you have no idea what has happened
to her?"  She wanted to lash out at him, but what good would it
do?  It wouldn't change the fact that her daughter was some kind
of superhero....The Slayer.  "She and that Spike character were
planning a rescue...your rescue.  I never saw her after that."

Xander said, "She was still fighting Angel when I was getting Giles
out of the building.  It wasn't looking good for her.  The fact that
she came back, left that note, is a good sign.  She's alive.  That's
more than we knew before."

"Angel?!"  Joyce squealed.  "That horrible man.  She was fighting
him?"

Willow joined the conversation, "He wasn't always bad.  When
Buffy first met him over a year ago, he was good.  A vampire
with a soul.  He helped Buffy, saved her life many times.  They
tried to fight it, but there was no way they could fight a love so
strong.  It was that love, that happiness Buffy gave him,
that cost him his soul.  She's had to live with that, and the pain and

death he caused afterwards."  Willow took a breath, then
continued, "Buffy went to kill him that day, to finally end it.  We
tried to restore his soul so she wouldn't have to, but I guess it
didn't work."

Joyce sat, head bowed, "He was so cruel that night he came to
the house.  He said the most awful things.  I never even saw it...the
things she was going through.  Her birthday...it all started
on her birthday, didn't it?  That's when I noticed a change, but
I didn't know what to do."

"Yes, it was her birthday," Giles replied.

"I still don't understand how or why.  I only understand that my
daughter is gone.  Can't you help me understand?"

"If you can help us..." was Giles only reply.





-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Love's Revival (12/?)
Date: 02 Jun 1998 11:10:02 EDT

Title: Love's Revival (12/?)
Author: Michelle
Email Addy: [e-mail]
Rating: PG
Spoiler: This part has none. But the story has a few up to Killed
By Death.
Feedback: PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE!!!
Disclaimer: Savarah is mine! Buffy and the gang belong to Joss
Whedon, the WB, etc. The Story and the characters not part of the
regular cast are mine!
Sumary:  What does the title say?
IMPORTANT: Sequal to The Dark One Series. This story is explained as
best as I could to fill in the blanks but you have to read "The Dark One" to
understand it. You can check it out as well as all my other stories at:
http://members.aol.com/aglx/fanfic.html < --- Changed Address
DEDICATIONS: This is dedicated to all the wonderful people who have
been helping me get this story going and keeping me from running into
blocks. (I just hate those!)  Thanks!

***************
Part 12

        "Well, well. That goody-two-shoes Angel is back. Who would have
thought she could pull it off?" Savarah smirked as she entered the now
vacant building. There was blood all over the floor. "Oh well. At least
I got what I came for." She smiled for a brief second before
disappearing into a cloud of smoke.


**********

        "Hey guys." Buffy's weak voice flowed through the room of
friends and family. Joyful smiles adorned all their faces as they saw
that her color had begun to return.
        "How ya feeling, Buff?" Xander asked.
        "No comment," Buffy said smiling faintly.
        "Well don't worry. We'll have you better and out of this
hospital in no time," Willow said cheerfully.
        "The sooner the better," Buffy said, her voice getting stronger.
She tried to sit up a bit but hissed in pain.
        "Buffy! Don't do that!" Her mother said.
        "Thanks, now you tell me."  Buffy looked around at her friends
and then her mom. "Mom, can you go get me something to eat? I'm
starving."
        "Sure, honey. I'll be right back. Any requests?"
        "Preferably, non-hospital food."
        "I'll see what I can do."
        Buffy waited for her mom to be out of hearing distance before
she turned to her friends.
        "Where's Angel?" Buffy was unable to remember the fight; her
only clue as to what had happened was the extreme pain she was in.
No one answered her question. They just stared at her in silence.
        "What? What happened? Where is he?"
        "Uh, well, um, he's gone." It was painful for Giles to talk
about him; after all that had happened he was just as glad that the
vampire hadn't been around.
        "What do you mean he's gone?"
        "He left. After he saw what he'd done to you, he just took off,"
Xander finally said after Giles refused to continue. Buffy looked at
him, unable to say anything. "Good riddance," Xander muttered under
his breath.  Cordelia elbowed him in the stomach and gave him a look
that could kill.
        "Buffy, I'm really sorry." Willow said, now stepping back a few
paces for fear of how Buffy would take the news.
        "He just left?" Tears filled her eyes.
        "I'm afraid so." Everyone could see how upset she was, despite
her attempts to mask it.
        "Guys, can you leave us alone for a few second? I need to talk
to Giles." Buffy finally whispered, avoiding eye contact with them.
        "Uh, sure," Xander said indicating for everyone else to leave.
He reluctantly ushered them all out, then followed.
        Giles closed the door behind them and then walked over by
Buffy's side.  "Are you alright?"
        "I'm fine. I just...well, um..." She couldn't bring herself to
say what she needed to say. As painful as she knew it would be, he
was the only one she could ask.  "I can't believe I'm asking you this."
She forced a smile realizing this was much harder than she thought it
would be.
        "Buffy?"
        "Giles, I need you to find Angel. I need you to bring him back
to me."
        "Buffy, if you ask me anything else, I'll do it in a heartbeat.
But not that. I won't, I won't do it. Look at yourself! Look at what
he's done to you!"
        "Giles, please. I can't lose him. Not after all this."  She
reached for his hand that was placed on the railing of the bed.
"Please?"

End Part 12 -- Did ya like it? More coming real soon! I promise.



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Love's Revival (13/?)
Date: 02 Jun 1998 11:15:45 EDT

Title: Love's Revival (13/?)
Author: Michelle
Email Addy: [e-mail]
Rating: PG
Spoiler: BIG TIME for Passion. Don't read this if you haven't see
past that episode.
Feedback: PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE!!!
Disclaimer: Savarah is mine! Buffy and the gang belong to Joss
Whedon, the WB, etc. The Story and the characters not part of the
regular cast are mine!
Sumary:  What does the title say?
IMPORTANT: Sequal to The Dark One Series. This story is explained as
best as I could to fill in the blanks but you have to read "The Dark One" to
understand it. You can check it out as well as all my other stories at:
http://members.aol.com/aglx/fanfic.html < --- Changed Address
DEDICATIONS: This is dedicated to all the wonderful people who have
been helping me get this story going and keeping me from running into
blocks. (I just hate those!)  Thanks!

***************
Part 13

        He walked through the streets, trying to get as far away as he
could.  Angel didn't really have a plan; perhaps he would just keep
walking until the sun rose and put him out of his misery. Angel
continued to walk a straight path, heading for the horizon.  He hadn't
been able to stop Angelu- no, he hadn't been able to stop himself. No
matter how hard he tried he just couldn't stop hurting her.
        A young couple walked down the sidewalk.  Angel froze in the
middle of the street. He remembered walking with Buffy at his side.
How they had hunted- well, made-out every night. He turned and ran
towards the graveyard. He had to escape, he couldn't face the memories
anymore, and the sun wouldn't be up for a few more hours.
        Jenny Calendar. Her gravestone had been an enjoyable sight.
Now the memory of his delight in her death made him sick. One of many
memories he wanted to be rid of. Angel ran towards a tree and snapped
off one of the branches. He studied it for a second. Buffy's broken
figure flashed in his mind.  Jenny's dead body lying there on that bed.
Angel closed his eyes and raised the makeshift stake to his chest.
        "Angel!" called an angry voice from behind him. He didn't move.
Angel continued to hold the branch steadily in front of him. All he had
to do was drive it into his chest, and everything would be over.  He
would never hurt Buffy again; she would no longer have to bear the
burden of his love.  So many lives would be better if he simply ceased
to exist.
        "Angel, don't. She needs you." Giles voice was hoarse as he
forced  the words out.
        "I'm the last thing she needs. Look at what I did to her." Angel
lowered the stake and turned to face Giles.
        "I know, and I've seen.  Buffy put her life on the line for
you."
        "I couldn't ask for a better reason to die," Angel said bitterly
as he repositioned the stake in front of him. "She doesn't need me.
All I've ever done is hurt her."
        "I couldn't agree with you more.  But Buffy wants you back. She
loves you."
        "That may be her only fault," he whispered, remembering her
body lying there on those broken boxes.
        Giles almost felt sorry for him.  Angel was desperate to die, if
it would give her a better chance to live.  "Please, just talk to her.
My God, she convinced _me_ to come after you. Doesn't that tell you
anything?"
        "I can't, Giles. Not after what I've done."
        "You know, you're right; after all the people you've hurt, you
don't deserve to be forgiven.  You've done too much damage and
caused too much pain. If it weren't for Buffy lying in that hospital bed,
_begging_ me to bring you to her, I would let you put that stake through
your heart." Giles held back his tears to make his point clear.
"Unfortunately, I can't. She means too much to me and you mean too
much to her. Just talk to her. That's all she's asking from you."
        "That's not all she's asking,"  Angel said softly. "And you know
it." He stared into space for a moment, then threw the branch to the
side.
        Giles sighed, relieved that he wouldn't have to bring more bad
news to Buffy.
        Angel turned, and walked silently back towards the hospital.

*************

Feedback, pretty please?



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: [e-mail]
Subject: BUFFYFIC: SC: Where to go from Here
Date: 02 Jun 1998 16:50:57 -0400

Title: Subreality Cafe:  Where To Go From Here
Author: Northlight
email: [e-mail]
Summary:  Difficulty with stories
Note: I've never written one of these before, but I'm having a lot of
trouble writing one *incredibly* frustrating story, and I didn't feel
like working on 'Broken Bonds' so...
Disclaimer: Subreality Cafe
(http://members.aol.com/Image89302/cafe.html) was created by Kielle.
The original Buffy characters belong to Joss Whedon.  The "Mystery
Slayer Theater" mentioned below is written by Jenni W.  Everything else
is mine <g>.

****

    Northlight stepped into the Buffy division of the Subreality Cafe and
looked around curiously.  She had heard of the X division, of course,
but she'd never actually been in Subreality.

    This particular one looked remarkably like the Bronze, either to make
the fictives more at home or because the designer hadn't been very
creative.  Either way, it didn't much matter.

    The dance floor was full.  The vast majority of the couples swaying to
the music were Buffys and Angels.  Willows, Jennys, Giles, Xanders,
Spikes, and Drus also spotted the the room, along with some original
fictives.

    A low rumbling sound drew Northlight's attention towards the shadowed
corner near the back of the cafe.  She couldn't keep her eyes from
rolling when she spotted what it was that had emitted the sound.  An
entire table was devoted to blood guzzling, snarling Angeluses.  They
glared around wrathfully, fangs barred.  Most of the Buffys pointedly
ignored them.

    Noticing her own Angelus among the growling crowd of vampires,
Northlight quickly moved away.  She didn't want to hear him complain
about being staked by Buffy's ghost in "Ever After" again.  He had
whined for days after she had written the story.

    Northlight moved towards an empty table and sat down.  She rested her
head against her hand and continued her visual sweep of the room.  An
embarrassed blush made it's way across her face as she spotted a vacant
eyed Xander clutching at an ax.  She hadn't thought that her fictives
from "Mystery Slayer Theater 3000" would have had the intelligence to
make it to the cafe.

    She drew her eyes away from the fascinating sight of the fictives
roaming about and pulled pulled a notebook out from her school bag.
Northlight selected a pen from her rather cramped pencil case and
flipped her notebook open to a blank page.

    After a long moment of tapping her pen against the lined sheet,
Northlight gave up.  She dropped her pen and gave a dejected sigh.  This
was not going well.  She had hoped that seeing and being surrounded by
such a vast amount of fictives would inspire something.  It obviously
hadn't worked.

    A soft cough attracted her attention, and Northlight lifted her head to
face an older blonde woman.  The woman was slightly fuzzy and indistinct
-- she hadn't been written yet.  Without waiting for acknowledgement,
the woman gracefully sat down across from Northlight.

    "What do you want, Buffy?" Northlight asked wearily.  She blindly
reached for her pen and began drumming it against the table.

    The older, composed Buffy shrugged slightly.  "I want to know when your
planning on writing *my* story.  It's been quite a while already."

    Northlight groaned.  She knew that was what Buffy wanted.  "I'm sorry,
Buffy.  I've *tried* to write your story four times already!  It just
isn't working!" She paused a moment, biting back her frustration with
that as of yet unwritten story.  "I'm thinking about totally dropping
it."

    Buffy looked horrified.  "You wouldn't!  Come on, you know that you
want to write it."

    Northlight glared at her fictive unhappily.  "No I don't!  It isn't
co-operating!"  She stabbed her pen at the already ink spotted page.
"Besides, I have to finish 'Broken Bonds' before I go doing anything
else.  I've already put that off too long."

    "Damned right!" a highly annoyed voice answered from the next table
over.

    "Don't you even start!" Northlight warned Tyler, "or... or I'll have
Giles kill you.  Once I actually work him back into the library, of
course..." she trailed off with another put upon sigh.

    Tyler glared at her a moment before turning back to his companion, a
stupid Buffy from another one of Northlight's submissions to 'Mystery
Slayer Theater'.

    "But you are going to write my story, right?" Buffy inquired, drawing
the conversation back to more important matters.  "I don't want to be
stuck as a vague idea forever!"

    Northlight hesitated a moment.  Buffy was right, she did want to write
that story... "I don't know.  I still have to try and write that Willow
story..." Buffy glared at her, and Northlight quickly continued, "but
I'll try!  I swear that I'll try to figure out some way to make your
story work.  Now why don't you go pick up one of those Angels?"

    "As long as you'll work on my story," Buffy insisted.

    When Northlight nodded, Buffy smiled and pushed back from the table.
"Now that you mention it, those Angels do look awfully good..."

    It would probably be best that she get to work before anymore irritated
fictives decided to inquire as to when their stories would be written,
or finished.  Northlight sighed once again and turned back to her
notebook.

End



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: [e-mail] (Ingrid E Stanton)
Subject: BUFFYFIC: DISCUSS: Problem Resolved (well, sorta)
Date: 02 Jun 1998 18:04:08 EDT

To whom it may concern-

Thank you! Thank you! The entire story has been restored thanks to the
collective efforts of oh,  the 50 or so people who sent me story parts!
My mailbox made it through, though! Everything has been pasted back into
a text document, and all is well again (except for the fact that my
brother is now missing- j/k!)

Don't expect a part today, though. I spent a couple of hours clearing out
my mailbox, and I have a load of homework and yet another concert (the
final one, except for graduation, thank God!) So maybe, soon, I promise!
Really....

-Ingrid

_____________________________________________________________________
You don't need to buy Internet access to use free Internet e-mail.
Get completely free e-mail from Juno at http://www.juno.com
Or call Juno at (800) 654-JUNO [654-5866]



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "R. Smith" <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: How to Reforge A Broken Blade (part 5/?)
Date: 02 Jun 1998 19:53:34 -0400

SPOILER ALERT SPOILER ALERT SPOILER ALERT SPOILER ALERT=20
This story contains extensive references to any and all episodes
up to and including Becoming II. BE WARNED: if you haven=92t seen
those episodes, READ NO FURTHER! (actually this part is almost=20
spoiler free, but better safe than sorry)
THIS=20
SPACE=20
IS=20
FOR=20
YOUR
PROTECTION

        See part one for disclaimers and notes. Comments or
requests for previous parts to [e-mail]   PLEASE DO NOT=20
DISTRIBUTE WITHOUT TALKING TO ME FIRST!


    Hours had passed since he=92d gotten the call, and Rick=20
had sunk so deeply into depression that Buffy was becoming=20
worried.
    =93So, what=92s the plan?=94 she asked, trying to break his
fall into the darkness.
    She knew where he was headed. She=92d been there herself.
And she knew that if she didn=92t get him doing something about
this, he was going to be completely useless.
    He looked at her without comprehension for a few=20
moments before replying, =93Plan?=94
    =93Yeah, you know. That thing where we figure out what=20
to do to rescue your daughter from the demons. That=92s called a=20
plan. They=92re fun, and you usually need one to succeed at=20
monster bashing.=94
    =93The plan is I die trying to rescue her. Happy now?=94
    =93Ok, that=92s a plan. Now can we come up with a plan that=20
doesn=92t suck in such a major way?=94
    =93No,=94 he said without looking up, =93We can=92t. Golab is=20
bad news like neither of us has ever seen. He=92s one of the=20
really big demons that no-one in their right minds tries to
summon. I can=92t stop him, you can=92t stop him, no-one can stop
him. I had to lie to Trina because she was already right on=20
the edge of sanity. How could I tell her that I can=92t fix this?=94
    His attitude was starting to piss Buffy off.
    =93Ok, look!=94 she said, =93This is _not_ _productive_!  Why=20
don=92t you try to stop whining and tell me what=92s going on, so at=20
least one of us can do something about it.=94
    Rick sighed.
    =93All right,=94 he said mechanically, =93The guys we stopped=20
the other night are part of a cult that worships demons. These=20
particular cultists have apparently come across the formula to=20
summon Golab to our world. Golab is known as the Prince of=20
War. He=92s designed to kill and nothing else. When he can=92t kill=20
mortals, he kills his own kind, so they=92ll be glad to get rid of=20
him for a while.=94=20
    =93He=92ll kill more people here than anything you can=20
imagine. To appease him, and keep him from killing them, the=20
cultists need virgins, a lot of them. They took my eleven year=20
old daughter in vengeance for our interference.=94
    =93When you say Prince of War, how bad is that?=94
    =93Almost all demons have a focus. Some are=20
manipulators, and some, like those that inhabit vampires,=20
possess mortals. Golab exists to kill, and given the chance=20
he=92ll kill everything on the planet. He=92s not big in the sense
of sucking the whole world into Hell, but he=92ll do a passable
job of _turning_ the world into one, at least for a while.=94
    =93So, how do we beat him?=94
    =93I don=92t think we do. Everything I=92ve read points to
the fact that he has none of a demon=92s normal weaknesses. You=20
either send him back, or kill him physically. Since neither of
us does magic, that leaves plan B, and I just don=92t think I=20
can do it. The last time he was summoned, an adept sent him=20
back, but not before he wiped out a small village. We can't=20
even do that much.=94
    =93So what do we do?=94 she asked.
    =93_You_ don=92t do anything. This is not about you. You=92re=20
retired, remember? My advice is for you to move far from here.=20
Maybe he=92ll get bored and go home before he gets to you. I=92ve=20
already said what I have to do. I try to get my kid back, and=20
die fighting Golab.=94
    =93Can=92t we get her back before he comes?=94
    =93Not unless you have a virgin detector on you. I won=92t=20
know where she is for...=94 He glanced at the calendar in the=20
kitchen. =93...three more nights.=94
    Buffy looked at the calendar. =93Dark of the moon?=94
    =93Yeah, replied Rick, =93They=92ll want every advantage for=20
this summoning. Golab is not one to invite to a party and then=20
not let in. He can reach across the veil to punish those who=20
tease him.=94
    Buffy thought for a moment then said, =93You know where=20
they=92ll summon him at? We could stake it out.=94
    =93I know the general area where the Vortex is.=94 Rick=20
responded, =91I think when they open the portal, I=92ll be able to=20
use the swords to find it. Until then, there=92s no way to be=20
sure I=92m in the right place.=94
    =93So we wait.=94 said Buffy.
    =93Look,=94 Rick snapped, =93I said you were not in on this.=20
What I want you to do is pack your shit and get out. Take the=20
Toyota,=94 he walked over to his desk and got an envelope out of=20
it, =93and this money, and get the Hell out of Dayton before it=92s=20
too fucking late.=94
    =93And you get to go and fight this thing alone.=94 Buffy=20
said with an edge to her voice, =93You know, I did that same=20
thing a couple of times, and it always ended poorly. I=92m not=20
going to let that happen to you. Like it or not, I=92m in this=20
with you, so you may as well accept it.=94
    Rick glowered at her, and Buffy gave him a look of
smug satisfaction.
    =93Don=92t bother,=94 she said, =93I=92ve had a British=20
librarian as a Watcher for two years. You can=92t even begin
to compete.
    After a moment, Rick nodded.
    =93Okay,=94 he said, =93You want to come along, come along.=20
But we do this my way. You do this, you follow orders.=94
    =93You got it,=94 she replied.
    *Unless you do something stupid,* she thought to=20
herself.
    They spent the next couple of days preparing. They=20
sparred for five or six hours a day. It wasn=92t the friendly=20
sparring of before, but hard -- each of them pulling out all
the dirty tricks they knew.
    When Rick wasn=92t in the gym, he was away from the=20
house. At first, Buffy had complained, figuring that he=92d=20
ditch her when the time came and leave her at the house.
    =93Look,=94 he said when she finally confronted him,=20
=93I said you could be a part of this, and I=92ll keep my word,
no matter how much I=92d like it otherwise. What I=92m doing=20
now, is getting my affairs in order -- making arrangements
in case I die, making sure my will is up to date, that kind
of thing. If you distrust me so much that you won=92t take my
word on this, you can come along tomorrow.=94
    =93That=92s okay,=94 she said, suddenly ashamed of her lack
of trust, =93I just worry about you. You=92re not entirely rational right
now, and I know how that feels.=94
    Finally, the night of the new moon came. They climbed=20
into Rick=92s car and drove into the countryside around=20
Beavercreek. Rick kept one hand on the hilt of his sword,=20
waiting for the tell-tale twitch that would tell him they were=20
close to their goal.
    As he drove, Rick told Buffy, =93Okay, here=92s the plan.
I=92m gonna get all their attention. It shouldn=92t be hard once
I kill a few of them. You wait until they all come after me,
then you get the girls and get them out of here.=94
    Buffy started to complain, but Rick cut her off, =93I=92m=20
counting on you to take care of that part of the plan, because=20
once I get into combat with Golab, I=92m not gonna have the=20
extra concentration to worry about my daughter. I know that=20
you=92ll take care of her, so I can put all my attention on=20
killing the big bastard. This is what I need you to do,=20
nothing more. Just get them out of there.=94
    Buffy nodded her head.
    They drove along in quiet for a while, when the sword=20
under Rick=92s hand twitched.
    =93Show time,=94 he said bleakly.
    He pulled the car over, grabbed both swords and began=20
walking in a slow circle. There was a definite tug in one=20
direction, and as soon as he was sure he had it they both=20
headed off at a dead run.
    They ran for about two miles, through a cornfield and
a small forest, until they came to the edge of a clearing.
    From the clearing came a sonorous voice, =93...implore=20
you, great Lord, come forth into this world a remake it anew.=20
Mighty Golab, we who are so unworthy do offer up the world as=20
your hunting ground and as a sign of our faith, we offer these=20
sweet morsels for your pleasure.=94
    Buffy=92s skin was crawling. She could feel the Vortex=20
open, so like the one that swallowed Angel, and for a moment,=20
she thought she wouldn=92t be able to go through with this. Then=20
a girl screamed, and shook her from her dark thoughts and=20
back to the present.
    Rick had eased forward to the very edge of the=20
clearing, and Buffy crawled up next to him.
    The Vortex was open, a swirling orange mass that=20
reeked of evil. In the clearing were about thirty men, dressed=20
in robes, all kneeling toward the Vortex. One man stood, book=20
in hand, and gave the invocation. Off to the side, a cage had=20
been erected, and inside were thirteen young girls, ranging in=20
age from about ten to seventeen. They were guarded by two=20
more robed men.
    Buffy took this all in with a brief glance, because as
she got into position, something stepped out of the Vortex.
    It was about seven feet tall, built lean, with the=20
leathery skin of a typical demon. It was naked, and thankfully=20
sexless, armed with an axe that looked capable of cutting an ox=20
in two. It stood to one side of the Vortex, glaring at the=20
assembled cultists, as two more just like it came out.
    =93Reavers,=94 Rick said quietly, =93Golab=92s lieutenants.=20
Time to move. I=92ll need to kill one of them before Golab gets
here. Remember the plan, get the girls back to the car and get
them the Hell out of here.=94
    He stood up and charged into the clearing without=20
preamble.
    Both swords were moving so swiftly that it was nearly=20
impossible to follow their paths in the flickering light of=20
the Vortex. Whenever Rick got near a cultist, the cultist died,
gutted or dismembered. Rick never slowed as he approached=20
the Vortex, and he left a cut swathe of corpses in his wake.
    It didn=92t take long for everybody to notice him. The=20
leader screamed, =93Kill him!=94 and all the surviving cultists=20
moved to surround him. The Reavers howled and shambled=20
forward, axes raised aggressively.
    When anyone got too close, Rick killed him.
    Buffy waited about twenty seconds, and headed around=20
the edge of the clearing toward the cage. The two cultists were=20
still guarding it, but Buffy was so worked up that they didn=92t=20
last fifteen seconds. As she finished with them, she kicked the=20
latch of the cage, shattering it like it was made of porcelain.
    =93Everybody out, now!=94 she said to the obviously=20
traumatized girls, =93That guy=92s buying us the time for me to get=20
you out of here.=94
    She ushered them toward the edge of the clearing.
    As she did, one of the girls looked over at the fight
and said, =93Daddy?=94
    She stopped. =93Oh God,=94 she continued, =93That=92s my=20
Daddy. They=92re going to kill him!=94
    She started toward the fight, and Buffy had to grab her=20
to keep her from jumping the nearest cultist.
    =93We have to help him!=94 the girl cried, =93There=92s too=20
many of them!=94
    Buffy thought fast.
    =93Can any of you drive?=94 she asked.
    One girl raised her hand.
    Buffy gave her the keys to Rick=92s car and said,=20
=93There=92s a car a couple of miles that way. Take everybody and
get out of here.=94
    She turned to Rick=92s daughter,
    =93You get the rest of the girls out of here, and I=92ll
help your Dad.=94
    When the girl nodded, Buffy said, =93Go on! Hurry!=94
    Buffy turned toward the battle.



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: sah <[e-mail]> (by way of sah <[e-mail]>)
Subject: BUFFYFIC: ADMIN:  List rules
Date: 02 Jun 1998 22:54:41 -0400

Welcome!  This list is for fiction related to "Buffy The Vampire
Slayer," both the TV series and the movie.  To ensure that we all get
to enjoy as much fiction as possible, please adhere to the following
guidelines, and please save them for future reference.

1. Fiction should have Buffy characters in it and clearly be related
to Buffy.  Crossovers are great, and expected, but general
vampire/monster stories that aren't in the Buffy universe and don't
use Buffy characters belong somewhere else.

2. Discussion of posted fiction is permitted onlist.  Please put
"DISCUSS" in your s*bject line.  Requests for missing story parts
should go directly to the author, and not be posted to the list.

Discussion that is not related directly to the fiction should go over
to the general Buffy list.  Discussion of fiction is expected to
follow common netiquette guidelines and use PG-13 language.

3. No advertising of <any> items or services, Buffy related or not,
and no posting of non-story items such as .gifs, sound files, etc..
No attached files of <any> kind-- if your mailer makes your fiction
into attached files, you need to find another way to get it to the list.

4. If you're writing a story and including advance information on a
new episode, and you're posting your story earlier than the national
viewing time, please:

     **Mark the post as a "spoiler" in the s*bject header.
     **Leave about twelve lines (blank or with non-spoiler info) at
          the top of the post.

This ensures that anyone who doesn't like knowing about an episode
ahead of time is "protected."  :)   The blank space is for people whose
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[e-mail]


-





-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "Andrea Newbery" <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Repercussions, part 8 by Andrea
Date: 02 Jun 1998 20:18:35 PDT

Title: Repercussions part 8 (this was only supposed to be ten chapters,
but sadly, it has gotten much longer. Sorry.)
Author: Andrea
e-mail: [e-mail]
Summary: Um...well it's after B2, so it's basically my attempt to make
everything all better. Well, after I make them suffer a bit more. :)
Disclaimers: The characters in this story are not mine. They are the
property of Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, WB, etc. I am not making any
money from this.
Feedback: Please. Good and bad.

Again, a huge thank you to Rachel for her help with this. :)

Chapter eight

Sunnydale High School Library
August 21, 1998

"So, you've got it all. Everything? Cause if we miss anything."  Xander
spoke in a voice that was one step away from going over the edge.
"Well, we can't miss anything."  Moving erratically around the library,
he was stuffing books haphazardly into his bag. Not checking to see if
they were books they needed, just tossing them in. Obviously subscribing
to the notion that more is always better.

"Xander." Cordelia stopped packing her bag and stared at him,
understanding his behavior was due to the night ahead. She really
couldn't fault him for being nervous, but unable to stop herself from
speaking, "Relax, I've got everything."  She supposed you couldn't relax
too much when you knew you were going to hell later that day. To save
someone you considered a killer. When she looked at things in that
light, she was amazed he was keeping it that together. He had even
managed to wear clothes that almost matched, studying him she realized
that was probably another sign of his anxiety.

"Relax?" His voice swung high, then cracked. He stared at her like she
had suddenly grown another head. "I'm going to hell in less than three
hours!"  Throwing the book he was holding on the table and falling into
one of the chairs. "Re_lax_!?"

Cordelia watched him, relieved he had finally said the words. He had
been so busy last night talking about anything but the day ahead. She
had tried a few times to discuss it but he had always changed the
subject. Looking at him sitting there, so nervous she thought he would
explode, she carefully began speaking the thought that kept running
through her mind. "Don't go. " Swallowing down her nervousness she
continued, "Giles said Buffy would be okay. Whistler even said he
thought it would be Buffy who went. Why not wait?"

She watched him digest her words, knowing from the look of disgust that
was appearing on his face that he wasn't going to go for it. She could
see him thinking about her words, discounting them. Because she was
Cordelia, they were probably wrong. She didn't know what else she could
do to prove to him that she wasn't the same person she had been. She
barely remembered who that person was. He was such a big part of the
reason she had changed so much, and she had finally thought he was
noticing.  Swallowing the sudden rush of bitterness in her throat, she
spoke again.

"Don't look at me like I'm being selfish. It's not selfish to not want
your boyfriend to go to hell. It's just sane. You are not Buffy, you
don't do things like this." She watched him, her eyes pleading with him
to understand. To stop this here, but knowing he wouldn't. She watched
him drum his fingers on the table, his body unable to be still.   She
forced her shoulders to relax, her lips to smile at him. She had known
this wouldn't work, but she had to try it.  If he felt he had to do
this, she would support him. She would walk with him to the edge of
hell. If he had to do this. Her voice trembling slightly she finished,
"But if you have to, I won't try to stop you again."

He was silent for a moment, his eyes suddenly fascinated by the far
wall.  She watched the pulse in his neck throbbing and held herself back
from begging him not to do it.  He looked at her finally, trademark
Xander grin in place, standing up he reached for her, "Think of it less
like sending your boyfriend to hell and more like helping your boyfriend
free yet another demon loose to roam on this planet."

Shaking her head at him, knowing he wanted her to go along with him.
Pretend that this was no big deal. Summoning her courage, needing to
help him through this, she answered, "Do you plan on being this witty
with the devil?"

He looked at her, his face shocked, "The devil?" Dropping her hands he
began pacing around the room, stopping only to look at her with
disbelief, "The devil?" Breaking eye contact, he continued his almost
spastic movements around the library. Pausing he stared at her again,
his face questioning. "Do you think there really is a devil? The big
badness. Head of all that is undead and generally nasty things?" His
voice getting louder with every word. Looking around the room wildly he
started pacing again. She watched him, trying desperately to think of
something to say. Unable to she just stood there, waiting.  Finally he
came to a halt beside a chair, grimacing then smiled weakly at her. "I
was thinking more along the lines of...well, some fires... a few
tortured souls. But that's as far as I got. The devil?" Throwing himself
into a chair he put his hands to his head, "What am I doing? I'm a
coward, I have to remember that."

Slumping back in the chair he looked at her, a mixture of bravado and
fear on his face. Her heart aching for him she walked over and slipped
into his lap. He wrapped his arms around her and held on tightly. She
leaned into him, enjoying the feel of his body against hers. Trying not
to think of the possibility she might not feel it again. She felt his
muscles relaxing as he held her. She smiled, grateful she could be of
some help to him. Wondering how she had gotten to this point, were he
meant so much to her. When the thought of a future without him had
become so abhorrent to her. She leaned against him, enjoying the feel of
the afternoon sun streaming in through the window. He began kissing her
neck and she moved her head, allowing him better access. Putting his
hands on her shoulders he pulled her around until her upper body was
facing his. The look on his face was intense, a young man headed off to
war, not knowing if he would return. He cupped his hands softly on her
face, and pulling her in began to kiss her, softly at first then harder.
He kissed her with an intensity that took her breath away, her thoughts
away. She kissed him back with the same fevour. A kiss between two
people scared they may never kiss again. Finally breaking the kiss she
ran her hand over his face, memorizing the feel of his skin under her
hand. "Xander?"

"Um."

She spoke softly, not wanting to upset the fragile calm that had settled
over them. "If you can't do it? If it's too hard or too scary...come
back. Don't try to be a hero? Please? Promise me that?" Her voice broke
on the last word but she held back her tears. Her eyes pleading with
him.

He smiled softly at her, leaned forward and kissed her nose. Brushing
her hair away from her face he spoke, "Promise. Cordie, I'm coming
back." He paused for a moment, taking a deep breath. "And I'll have
Angel with me."  His eyes were less afraid now, more determined, the
soldier from his halloween memories coming to the front.

Running her fingers through his hair she smiled bravely at him. Refusing
to let him see the worry she was feeling. She could feel his body
tightening under her as the reality of what he was doing settled in on
him once more. Leaning her head against his shoulder she closed her
eyes, taking a moment to memorize this feeling.  Her head on his
shoulder she looked up at the ceiling, trying to stop the next words out
of her mouth. She knew they were selfish, unimportant, but she needed to
know. Needed to prepare for every possibility. Speaking to the ceiling
she started, "Why?"

Feeling him stiffen at her words she refused to look at him. She stared
at the ceiling as if it held the answers she was looking for. She could
feel his hesitation, knew exactly the expression on his face without
looking. The patented Xander mixture of guilt and fear.  She felt him
take a deep breath finally and speak, "Why what?"

Smiling at his attempt to stall she spoke the words quickly before her
courage ran out at what his answer may be. " Why risk it? Why not wait
for Buffy? Why would you go to hell for her, to save her boyfriend?  Is
it because you are still in love with her?" She marvelled at how casual
her voice sounded, how calm.  As if his answer couldn't destroy her.
Counting the holes in the ceiling tiles to pass the time she waited.

"No.  I love her, I'm not in love with her." Xander's voice was clear.

Letting out the breath she hadn't realized she was holding, she turned
to face him waiting for him to continue. His eyes held hers, begging her
to believe his words. She touched his face, wrinkling her nose at him.
Rewarded with his smile, he began to explain. " I owe this to her.  She
is the slayer. She has saved us, saved the world. Now she needs
something that I can give her." He paused, taking a deep breath his eyes
filled with regret, "Maybe something I took from her. "

Her eyes misted at the pain and guilt in his words. Wanting to help him
she slid off his lap and turning, knelt in front of him. Her hands
holding his she spoke, "You did what you thought was right.  You didn't
do it to hurt her." Her voice was strong, the tone almost angry. She
didn't wanting him running into hell on some suicide mission because he
felt he had failed Buffy.

"Does that matter though?" His voice sounded so young, so broken.
Looking at him, at the lines on his face, the dark circles under his
eyes she realized how important this was to him.  He looked at her,
shoulders slumped, his face wreathed in misery, "Willow risked her life
to do the curse.  I decided that didn't count. Willow is my best friend
and I let her risk her life for nothing." His voice faded as he spoke.
His fingers were digging into her palm. She didn't move, didn't speak,
just waited for him to continue.

"I did it because I lost faith in her. That's what I tell myself." He
spoke in a voice laced with disgust. She tensed, knowing it was directed
at himself. "But did I really lose faith? I'm not sure anymore. It
doesn't matter though. The result is what matters." Squeezing her hands
he let them go, his eyes determined again. "I have to do this."

 She let him go, realizing, maybe even more than he did, how important
this was to him. Understanding that for him the pain of losing both
Willow and Buffy was too much for him. She stood offered her hand to
pull him to his feet. Standing he put his arms around her and rested his
head against her neck. She buried her face on his shoulder, vowing to
herself that she would make Willow and Buffy understand. If he failed
she would do whatever it took for them to forgive him. Feeling a surge
of protectiveness run through her she held on tighter, not wanting to
ever let him go.  Sighing, she pulled back looking into his face.
Leaning into him she began to kiss his face slowly. His forehead,
eyebrows, eyelids. Each kiss a promise that things would be okay. That
she would make sure of it. He stood quietly, letting her kiss him
without responding. She kissed his nose, cheeks, chin. Then she brushed
lightly over his lips, a tiny whisper. He came alive then, his mouth
searching hers, almost violently. She returned the kiss in the same
fashion, understanding his need for the intimacy.  They remained wrapped
in each other, neither hearing the door open or the sound of Giles feet
as he walked into the library.

"Ah-hem."

They jumped apart guiltily, letting go of each other and turning to him.
Standing closely together arms at their sides. Giles glanced at them,
then down at the table and all the books they had covering it. He looked
to them, gestured at the table, waiting for an explanation. She felt
Xander tensing beside her, so she spoke first, thinking he would want to
know, but would be afraid to ask.

"How's Buffy?" Praying that it was good news, she was afraid of Xander's
reaction if they hadn't been able to help her.

Giles looked at the table for a second longer, then letting it go for
the moment,  "Good. She's fragile, but I think in time...she will learn
to deal with this." He hesitated then continued, his demeanor conveying
his discomfort with his words. "X-Xander, m...maybe you should stay away
from her for a while."

Xander nodded at him, grabbing Cordelia's hand. She squeezed it, trying
to support him through her fingers. Feeling helpless to make this any
easier for him. She waited for Xander to begin to speak, to tell Giles
of their plans. When he didn't seem to do anything she opened her mouth,
beginning to tell Giles, Xander's body swung around and he glared at
her, his eyes telling her to keep quiet. Grabbing their bags he took her
by the arm, speaking to Giles for the first time, "Right. Of course.
We'll go now. Bye."

He dragged her from the library leaving Giles watching them. Once they
got outside Cordelia pulled her arm free, glaring at him. "Why didn't
you tell him. That was our deal. He can help us."

Glancing back towards the library he spoke angrily, " Really? Help me?
Help me go to hell to save Angel. assisted, might I add, by another
demon that we know nothing about. He'd never go for it."

She looked at him, seeing the new hurt on his face from Giles words.
She pleaded with him, "But..."

"It's done." His voice was remote, she could feel him pulling away from
her again. She shuddered, feeling suddenly chilled in spite of the
afternoon sun. He continued speaking, his voice dead, "We do it tonight.
If I can't get Angel, well nobody even has to know I tried. I'll tell
Giles then, only then."

She stood there for a moment, trying to decide what to do. Should she go
back inside and tell Giles herself, or should she honor Xander's wish.
Not knowing what to do she just stood there, looking at him. He didn't
move, didn't change his facial expression, nothing that would help her
decide.  She pictured Giles, the library, how they had always depended
on him to come up with the right answers. Her mind caught, rewound,
realizing that there should be enough information on the table for Giles
to figure out what they were doing. She relaxed, putting her faith in
Giles that he would figure it out in time and make sure everything
turned out okay. Trying to hide her thoughts from Xander she looked at
the ground, answering him, "Okay."

They walked slowly down the road, away from the library. Wandering
towards the park, they found a bench and sat down. Arms wrapped around
each other, unable to speak anymore. They waited as the afternoon faded
away.




______________________________________________________
Get Your Private, Free Email at http://www.hotmail.com



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "R. Smith" <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: How to Reforge A Broken Blade (part 7/?)
Date: 03 Jun 1998 01:04:24 -0400

SPOILER ALERT SPOILER ALERT SPOILER ALERT SPOILER ALERT=20
This story contains extensive references to any and all
episodes up to and including Becoming II. BE WARNED: if
you haven=92t seen those episodes, READ NO FURTHER!=20
(actually this part is almost spoiler free, but better
safe than sorry)
THIS=20
SPACE=20
IS=20
FOR=20
YOUR
PROTECTION

        See part one for disclaimers and notes. Comments or
requests for previous parts to [e-mail]   PLEASE DO NOT=20
DISTRIBUTE WITHOUT TALKING TO ME FIRST!


    Rick was surrounded by about twelve men. Two of the=20
demons were still standing, and Rick was engaged in a=20
furious exchange of blows with one of them. The cultists=20
were trying to get in grappling range, but whenever one of=20
them did, either Rick or the demon killed them. They were=20
beginning to hang back, but Buffy could see that given an=20
opening, they=92d grab Rick, and the fight would be all over.
    =93Hey boys,=94 Buffy called, =93I just let all your sacrifices=20
go.=94
    Most of the cultists eagerly moved away from the=20
fight, and attacked Buffy.
    She opened up on them with a devastating barrage=20
of punches and kicks that left four of them bleeding at her=20
feet.
    She whirled through the group of them, never=20
stopping for longer than it took to throw a punch or a kick.=20
She knew that to stop was to die. Except for the attack in=20
Dayton itself, Buffy had never really cut loose on mortals=20
before, and in that  fight she could hardly say she was in=20
top form.
    Now, after weeks of heavy training with Rick, she=20
was cutting through this group of goons like a hot knife=20
through butter. Every punch or kick broke a bone, or worse.
    Rick was holding his own against the Reaver and=20
the few cultists that had stayed near him. He realized that=20
direct blocks were out of the question, since the Reaver=92s=20
axe weighed almost as much as Rick. He was doing a lot of=20
ducking and dodging, using the relative slowness of the axe=20
against its wielder. The beast was extremely adept at=20
keeping out of sword=92s reach, however, and although Rick=20
was keeping the demon at bay, he couldn=92t score a telling=20
blow of his own.
    Suddenly, the Vortex shivered, the air in the=20
clearing screamed, and with a heavy thud like an=20
elephant=92s tread, Golab stepped through the Vortex and=20
into our world.
    He was huge, approaching twelve feet tall, and=20
covered with layers and layers of muscle. He was truly=20
hideous, covered with a mottled grey-green hide and=20
sporting six inch fangs and glowing yellow eyes. In one=20
ham-sized hand he bore a seven foot long, serrated-edge=20
sword. With the other, he grabbed the nearest screaming=20
cultist and casually bit off his head.
    His entrance distracted everyone, but Rick recovered=20
before anyone else and, with a quick scissoring motion,=20
beheaded the Reaver he was facing. He leapt over the fallen=20
monster and threw himself bodily at Golab. He held small=20
hope that he could beat Golab in a fight, and hoped that he=20
might get lucky in the first moments of Golab=92s invasion.
    Golab backhanded him out of the air, knocking him=20
a dozen feet through the air, where he landed with a thud.=20
Golab growled something to the remaining Reaver who=20
promptly lumbered toward Buffy. It began to fade from=20
view as it moved, and soon it was nearly transparent.
    Buffy was down to her last few cultists, and was=20
finding that the fewer they were, the harder they were to=20
kill. They didn=92t foul each other up as much, and were=20
better able to work together against her. She was sure that=20
given time, she=92d have no trouble taking them out, but she=20
was worried about Rick. She had her back to that fight, and=20
her opponents were keeping her that way. They=92d moved=20
into a semi-circle, and were trying to use wolf-pack tactics=20
on her. consequently, she had no idea that the last Reaver=20
was moving slowly, and nearly invisibly, toward her.
    Rick got shakily to his feet and charged Golab.=20
Using the same duck and sting tactics he=92d used on the=20
Reaver, he pushed Golab back a few feet, and slowly began=20
to get the upper hand in the battle. His two swords whirled=20
in a constant circle of death, actually connecting with the=20
demon=92s thick hide on several occasions.=20
    Golab was slower than Rick, but faster than the=20
Reavers and as the fight wore on, Rick knew that Golab=20
would just wear him down.
    The Reaver rose up behind Buffy, losing its cloaking=20
field as it raised its axe for a killing blow.
    Buffy sensed it at the last minute, and even as she=20
tensed to throw herself to the side, she knew she was going=20
to be too slow.
    Rick had not been paying much attention to the rest=20
of the clearing, and so he almost missed the Reaver as it=20
crept up on the distracted Slayer.
    *Dammit!* he thought to himself, *What is she=20
_doing_ here?*
    *Doing her best to back your stupid ass up,* he=20
replied, *and getting ready to die in the attempt.*
    *Damn.* he thought, and did the only thing he=20
could.
    Buffy tensed to receive the blow when she heard=20
Rick yell from across the clearing,=93Godguidemyhandagainstthedarkness.=94
    There was a crunch of metal cutting bone, and the=20
Reaver fell to the ground beside her, Rick=92s sword piercing=20
its breastbone.
    Buffy finished the last of her dumbfounded=20
opponents and turned to see what was happening in the=20
other fight.
    With only one sword, Rick was hard-pressed to keep=20
Golab off of him. He was fighting a purely defensive battle,=20
and still losing ground.
    Buffy pulled the sword from the dead Reaver and=20
ran toward the fight.
    She hadn=92t taken more than four or five steps when=20
Golab feinted with his sword and then grabbed Rick with=20
his free hand. Buffy could hear bones crunch from where=20
she was, and knew that if she didn=92t do something, this=20
fight was over.
    Rick tried to scream in agony as his ribs shattered=20
from the crushing grip. The pain was so bad that he nearly=20
fainted, staying conscious by force of will alone.
    Golab was grinning as he brought Rick closer
to his fanged maw. The monster was sure he had won,=20
and was already looking forward to turning the Earth=20
into a killing field.
    As he came within sword-reach of Golab=92s face,=20
Rick muttered, =93Here=92s a little something to remember me=20
by, you ugly fuck.=94 and used all of his remaining strength to=20
drive his sword into Golab=92s left eye.
    Golab howled as the blessed steel drove straight to=20
the back of his head. He threw Rick away from him, tearing=20
the sword from Rick=92s feeble grasp, and sending Rick=20
soaring high into the air to arc across the clearing and=20
crash into a tree with the sickening sound of still more=20
bones breaking.
    Golab staggered around the clearing a bit, finally=20
plucking the sword from the gore-filled hole that used to be=20
its eye. Its remaining eye focused on Rick=92s prone body, and=20
the beast moved toward him purposefully.
    Buffy took all this in in shocked silence. It had all=20
happened so quickly, she=92d had no time to react. Finally,=20
she shook herself, and charged forward, already sure she=92d=20
be too late to stop Golab from finishing Rick off. She=20
glanced at the sword in her hand, hoping that she=92d have=20
the strength to finish what Rick had started. The=20
inscription on the blade glowed eerily in the light of the=20
Vortex, and Buffy realized that if she wanted to save Rick,=20
she=92d have to try.
    =93God guide my hand against the Darkness,=94 she=20
whispered, and with a surge of power and a twist of her=20
shoulders, she let the sword fly toward Golab=92s back.
    It sailed across the intervening space like a missile,=20
and for a moment, everything in the clearing went quiet.
    Golab sensed the blade coming, and began to turn.=20
His sword started to come up in defense as Buffy=92s sword=20
took him under the left armpit.
    Golab screamed as the blade pierced his black heart,=20
and dropped to his knees, dropping his sword. He plucked=20
weakly at the hilt sticking out of his side for a few seconds,=20
and then he toppled to the ground.
    The Vortex went out like a blown-out candle,=20
plunging the clearing into darkness.
    Buffy ran over to the crumpled form on the ground,=20
kneeling next to him.
    Rick was still breathing, if poorly, but it was obvious=20
even to Buffy=92s untrained eye that his back was broken. She=20
wanted to do something, but had no idea what would help=20
and what would do more damage.
    As she sat there, trying to decide what to do, Rick=20
opened his eyes.
    =93Golab....?=94 he whispered, stopping to cough thickly.
    =93Dead,=94 Buffy said, =93You got him.=94
    Rick nodded, coughed up more blood, and said, =93Not=20
much... time left. Need a favor.....=94
    He looked at her hopefully, then lapsed into more=20
coughing.
    When Buffy nodded, he continued, =93My desk... letter=20
for you......instructions......=94
    Buffy felt tears begin to burn their way to her eyes,=20
but held them in check enough to reply, =93Whatever it says.=20
I=92ll do it. You just rest till we get you out of here.=94
    Rick tried to chuckle, lapsed into more coughing and=20
said,=94 No...... Broken inside, back, lungs... already dead.=94
    His eyes closed, and Buffy thought he was gone, but=20
they snapped open again.
    =93No guilt, miss,=94 he said, =93We won....... I knew...this=20
was only way..... No way to change my fate. Rhi is ok?=94
    Buffy nodded, and said, =93They=92re all to the car by=20
now and on their way home.=94
    =93You go now....=94 Rick muttered, =93Don=92t grieve.=20
There=92s....=94
    He fell into a fit of coughing so bad, Buffy could hear=20
his shattered ribs grinding together. As it finished, he=20
grabbed her hand firmly and gazed deeply into her eyes.
    =93Proud of you,=94 he coughed, =93Love.....you.=94
    With a shudder, he died.
    Buffy sat there until dawn, holding his hand as it=20
cooled and crying softly. When the sun rose, she stood,=20
brushed the tears from her eyes, and started the long walk=20
back to his house. She had a promise to keep.

                            **********

    In Rick=92s desk were two letters, one with her name=20
printed on it, the other unmarked.
    She opened the one addressed to her.

Dear Buffy,
    If you=92re reading this, then I=92m dead but the world=20
goes on. I=92m sorry to not be there with you. My time with=20
you has been the best in a long time.
    Please, take one of my swords and the letter that=20
you found with this one, and give them to my son. Try to=20
explain to him what happened and let him know that he=92s=20
up, but that he doesn=92t have to do this if he doesn=92t want to.=20
The letter spells it out for him as well as giving him details=20
about how to take over for me if he chooses this life. I just=20
think it=92ll be easier for him to hear coming from you.
    Take the other sword for yourself as a remembrance of=20
an old man whom you made very happy by sharing his life. Also
go to the self storage on Shoup Mill Road and open storage=20
garage #126. (the key is enclosed). Everything in it is for=20
you, to help you on your way.
    With me gone it won=92t be safe for you in Dayton anymore.
Go away. My advice is go home. In the past weeks, I=92ve learned=20
that friendship is not so over-rated after all. You have people
that care about you very much, and you need them. Don=92t end up=20
like me -- so alone and lonely that you don=92t even remember what
happiness is like. Go home -- even if you never slay another=20
monster in your entire life.
    I hear you stirring in the next room, so I have to=20
finish this damned letter. I hate good-byes, but this pretty=20
much has to be one so good-bye.

Love,
Rick

    Buffy stared at the page, trying to sort through her=20
feelings. She was so close to breaking down again that she=20
didn=92t know how she was going to make it. She wanted to=20
scream and cry and throw things, but she knew that Rick=20
would not be impressed. Unable to figure out exactly how=20
she felt, she went inside and began to pack. She=92d deliver=20
her packages to Rick=92s son, go see what he=92d left her, and=20
then decide what to do.

more to come....



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "R. Smith" <[e-mail]>
Subject: Re: BUFFYFIC: How to Reforge A Broken Blade (part 5/?)
Date: 03 Jun 1998 01:06:11 -0400

Hrmph.....
accidentally posted Part six with the Part five label. Hope everybody
caught it before they autodeleted it.

-R



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: [e-mail] (Annanara a.k.a Anna)
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Dreams of Nothing
Date: 03 Jun 1998 01:41:32 EDT

TITLE:  Dreams of Nothing
AUTHOR: Annanara
DISTRIBUTION: Serendipity's wonderful archive "The Labyrinth", Willfic
archive, and Anya's Slayer's Fanfic Archive, anyone else, please ask.
DISCLAIMER: I don't own Buffy & Co., though Joss Whedon does and is doing
a wonderful job! (Don't you agree? :)
SETTING: This is set maybe a few days after the season fnale.


Xander stood in the middle of nowhere. He was surrounded by nothing but
white mist and a blanket of black in the distance.  Other than himself,
nothing else seemed to exist.

I'm dreaming, he thought.  I have to be, even in Sunnydale nothing is
this...vacant.

"Xander," a voice called out behind him.  He turned to find Buffy
standing before him, her eyes dark and emotionless.

"Buffy!!  Boy am I glad to see you!" Xander exclaimed.  He was so happy
to see her, he didn't notice that she never smiled at him.  "What are you
doing here?  Where did you go?  What happened to you and Angel?  Giles is
going nuts!"

He waited for Buffy to reply, but she just stood there silently.
"Buffy?"  He tried to walk toward her, but whenever he took a step
forward it seemed like nothing happened.  It was like he was walking on a
treadmill.  He couldn't tell if he was really moving at all.  The lack of
landmarks didn't help in judging distances either.

He started running to her, but the result was the same.  He was always
out of reach of her.  He kept running and running until he had to stop to
catch his breath.  When he did, Buffy suddenly turned to her side as the
mist churned from being disturbed.  Out of the mist Angel, sporting a
part human, part demon face, came walking out.  She smiled up at Angel
and hugged him.  Turning to Xander one last time, she said, "I love
Angel," before walking into the mist with him.

"Buffy, wait!!" Xander lept at her, but it was not good, they were gone.
"Buffy...."

"Xander," a new voice said behind him.  He spun around quickly to find
himself facing Cordelia.

"Cordy?  Cordy, Buffy was just here and she was with Angel!  We have to
find her!" Xander moved towards Cordelia and got nearly within reach
before he was mysteriously stopped again.  He ran, jumped, sprinted,
everything he could think of to get nearer, but it was no use.

"Buffy did this, Buffy did that.  Buffy, Buffy, Buffy.  What about me?"
Cordelia asked, her voice as cold as ice.

When he realized that Cordelia wasn't commenting on his antics, he became
worried.  "Cordelia?"  He paused, his heart sinking.  "You...you know I
like you, right?"

"I can't say æI love you.'" Cordelia stated and turned, walking into the
mist that whispered her name in a chant.

Xander lunged at her in one last desperate attempt to keep her from
leaving, but as with all the others, it was useless.

I'm useless, he thought mournfully.  I'm losing them all.  He fell to the
ground, hugging his knees and rocking.  I must be dreaming, I have to be
dreaming...I can't be losing them...but I am...I'm lossing them all.
Everyone but...

"Xander."

He stopped his rocking and hid his face, closing his eyes tightly.  Not
her too, please god, not her too, Xander silently pleaded.  Have mercy.
Anyone but her...

"Xander," the voice repeated.

I won't turn around.  Maybe she'll just...I don't want to face her...
His thoughts were in confusion.  He hoped she'd go away, but he didn't
want her to leave him.  On the other hand, he didn't want to hear the
words she'd have to say to him.

"Xander," the familiar voice said again, it's tone cold and distant.

Xander shook his head.  He hazarded a glance from his hiding spot and saw
Willow standing before him.  "Willow..." he sighed sadly.  This time, he
could see the total lack of emotion on her face, the emptiness in her
eyes.  He wanted to look away, but found himself standing instead.

Her dull eyes watched him as he stood.  He tried to mentally brace
himself against what she would have to say.  I can take it, he thought
stoically, knowing that, in the end, he wouldn't be able to.

A shifting in the mist caught his attention again and he watched as a
part werewolf, part human Oz walked out of the mist.  He walked up to
Willow, pulling her into a hug.  She smiled up at him, her whole face
lighting up, her eyes filled with contentment and joy.

Xander tried to look away, but couldn't.  Words could never describe the
pain he felt in his heart upon seeing them together like this.  It was
worse than anything she could ever have said.

He stood up taller as Willow turned her attention back to him.  Her eyes
became dull again.  He wanted so much to cover his ears, but he couldn't
move.  He was wrong.  There was something even worse that she could say
to him.

He heard her words, each one seemed to echo in his ears,
"I...love...Oz...."  Without saying anything more, the love of his life
turned and walked with Oz into the mist.  As they did, he heard Oz
clearly whisper to her, "You have the sweetest smile...."

He felt his heart shatter into a million pieces.  He bolted after her and
felt his fingers briefly touch her silky soft hair before they vanished
into the mist.  His Willow was gone.  The Willow he found he loved was
taken away by...by...

"By someone who appreciated her more than me," he cried softly.  He
stared into the vast nothingness and cried out Willow's name as the
existence surrounding him went dark.
-----------------

Annanara
Keeper of Willow's Box of Raisins
Keeper of Giles' Skip
"That went well.  I think." <skip> --Giles, SAR

_____________________________________________________________________
You don't need to buy Internet access to use free Internet e-mail.
Get completely free e-mail from Juno at http://www.juno.com
Or call Juno at (800) 654-JUNO [654-5866]



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: [e-mail] (Annanara a.k.a Anna)
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Just a Few Insignificant Others
Date: 03 Jun 1998 01:41:32 EDT

TITLE:  Just a Few Insignificant Others
AUTHOR:  Annanara
DISTRIBUTION:  Serendipity's archive, the Slayer Fanfic Archive, anyone
else who wants it, please ask.
DISCLAIMER:  Joss Whedon owns Buffy and all the wierd and wacky residents
of Sunnydale.  I just like to borrow them every once in a while and make
my own fun ;-)


"...so, then, I handed her over to Devon, æcause you know, he's the lead
singer and all.  I figured he could be rude enough to her to get her to
go away.  Boy was I right!  But now, I'll never have to do that again."
Oz paused, his arms wrapped around Willow, who was playfully sitting on
his lap in the library.  "And that, is how I got rid of my first groupie.
 Though, I won't say it beats out some of Cordy's horror dates."

"Yah...well...well at least I have better taste then some girls,"
Cordelia huffed.  Xander smirked and she hit him on the arm before
cuddling closer to him.

"So, what about the rest of you?  Any dangerous, past boyfriends I should
worry about Will?" Oz asked, grinning.  The Slayer and her original
Slayerettes burst out laughing.  Oz and Cordelia shared a confused look
and just watched as the trio tried to control their hysteria.

"What's so funny?!" Cordelia demanded.  Oz nodded in silent agreement
with Cordelia, though he didn't like the fact he was agreeing with
Cordelia at all.

"It's just...hehehe...the three of us beat everyone out...especially
Xander," Buffy stuttered, trying to keep from laughing.  Xander turned a
little redder.

"Yah, well, go ahead and tell Oz about your wonderful guy..er..demon,
Moloch, Willow," Xander said, trying to not-so-subtly change the subject
over to the group's resident hacker. "Tell him how he's the not the
-first- supernatural guy you've gone for."

"Yeah, I think I'd like to hear this," Oz said, smiling at Willow.  She
just blushed and settled herself in Oz's lap.

"Well, it all began when Ms. Calendar had the computer class scan books
into the computer.  Giles was against it, as always."  Willow's rolled
her eyes, showing exactly how she felt about Giles' lack of forward
advancement into the technological era.  "After hours, I started scanning
some of Giles' occult books for easier reference.  Well, one of those
happened to contain a demon by the name of Moloch.  When I scanned the
book, it released him into the Internet."  Willow paused, sighing.  "He
contacted me and pretended to be a real guy...uh...over the Internet.  He
seemed great too...," she said sadly.  She smiled though when she felt Oz
hold her tighter.  "Anyways, he wanted me to join him, I wouldn't, we got
into a big fight, yadda, yadda, yadda, and Buffy saved the day."

Oz pulled Willow in close and kissed her cheek.  "You didn't exactly have
a good start to the dating thing, huh?" he whispered softly into her ear.
 She nodded and gave Oz some smoochies of her own.

Xander, suddenly sickened at the love-fest before him, turned to Buffy.
"And what about you missy?"

"Me?  Come on, Xander, you know the -only- supernatural date I've -ever-
had was with Angel," Buffy said, grinning.  "So, I'm not as bad as
Willow.  She's had two supernatural dates."  She smiled at Oz, "No
offense."

"None taken," Oz said, grinning before turning back to face Willow.

Xander rolled his eyes.  "So, Buffy's had Dead Boy, Willow's had I'm an
Internet demon Moloch, and Wolf Boy Oz..."

"And what about you, Xander?" Cordelia asked, grinning.

"Ugh...only a few, nothing worth mentioning..." Xander stammered.

"Nothing worth mentioning?!" Willow and Buffy exclaimed together.  "Oh,
come -on- Xander," Willow exclaimed, "what about Ms. French?  You
remember, the virgi...er...very big She-Mantis who was out to get you?"

"Ms. French?  You mean, as in that biology teacher we had last year?"
Cordelia asked, amazed.  "No way...."

"Oh, yes way," Buffy giggled.  "In a big way too...but of course, she
only wanted him for his body...which he wasn't willing to give up as she
would have decapitated him like an Immortal from that Highlander
series...only without the swords."

"So, instead, we had to rescue Xander from a little too much love,"
Willow said grinning.  She raised an eyebrow and smiled.  "No, I take
that back.  Ampata the Inca Mummy Girl would have to be the one who
wanted a bit too much lovin', wouldn't you say Buffy?"

Buffy nodded, enjoying the look of Xander turning an amazing shade of
red.  "I guess you could say she loved him so much she would have sucked
the life out of him.  But, in a pleasant, non-neck, non-vampire way, of
course."

Xander groaned and hid his head in his hands.  This is embarrassing, he
silently moaned.  Willow laughed.  "Hey, Xander, you're the one that
brought it up!"

"Don't remind me...," he moaned.

Cordelia smiled and grabbed Xander's arm.  "Come on Don Juan, time for
some quality time together.  And maybe you can tell me a bit more about
these wonderful girls you seem to chose as girlfriends..."

Buffy, Willow, and Oz laughed as Xander kept chanting over and over,
"They meant nothing to me...really..."
---------------------------
Feedback is always appreciated! :-)

Annanara
Keeper of Willow's Box of Raisins
Keeper of Giles' Skip
"That went well.  I think." <skip> --Giles, SAR

_____________________________________________________________________
You don't need to buy Internet access to use free Internet e-mail.
Get completely free e-mail from Juno at http://www.juno.com
Or call Juno at (800) 654-JUNO [654-5866]



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "R. Smith" <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: How to Reforge A Broken Blade (part 8/8)
Date: 03 Jun 1998 02:08:48 -0400

SPOILER ALERT SPOILER ALERT SPOILER ALERT SPOILER ALERT=20
This story contains extensive references to any and all
episodes up to and including Becoming II. BE WARNED: if
you haven=92t seen those episodes, READ NO FURTHER!=20
(actually this part is almost spoiler free, but better
safe than sorry)
THIS=20
SPACE=20
IS=20
FOR=20
YOUR
PROTECTION

        See part one for disclaimers and notes. Comments or
requests for previous parts to [e-mail]   PLEASE DO NOT=20
DISTRIBUTE WITHOUT TALKING TO ME FIRST!


    Buffy pulled up in front of the house in her new car.
    She=92d gone to the self-storage place first, and had=20
found this new Saturn inside. On the driver=92s seat was a=20
brief note.

Buffy,
    This will get you wherever you want to go. It=92s in=20
your name, so don=92t worry about it too much, just get in it=20
and go.
    There=92s a briefcase in the trunk. It has some=20
traveling cash in it so you don=92t have to use your card.
Try to keep yourself together and remember what I said=20
about friends.

Remember me,

Rick

    So here she was in front of his ex-wife=92s house, trying=20
to figure out what to say to his son.
    She grabbed a bundle from the passenger seat,=20
walked up to the door, and rang the bell.
    A young man answered the door, so obviously Rick=92s=20
son that Buffy nearly broke into tears at the sight of him.
    *So young,* she thought, *Too young for this kind of=20
responsibility. How do I tell him this?* =20
    =93Are you Ricky?=94 she asked.
    =93Yeah...=94 he said slowly, =93=94What can I do for you?=94
    =93I=92m a friend of you Dad=92s.=94 she replied, =93I have some=20
things for you. Can I come in?
    =93He=92s dead isn=92t he?=94 Ricky asked, suddenly looking=20
like the little boy she=92d expected.
    =93Can I come in for a little bit?=94 she asked, =93I=92ve got=20
some stuff to tell you about one of the bravest men I=92ve ever=20
met.=94

                      **********

Epilogue

    She=92d stayed at Rick=92s son=92s house a lot longer than=20
she=92d planned.=20
    He=92d had a lot of questions, about how his father=20
died, and what it was all about. He=92d proven to be a _very_=20
mature thirteen year old. He didn=92t break even when Buffy=20
told him the details of Rick=92s death. He just nodded, and=20
said it was pretty much what he expected.
    He told he he=92d started remembering stuff about the=20
night the demons had attacked the house, and that he could=20
remember his Dad fighting like a wild man to protect them.=20
He said he=92d somehow known that when his father died, it=20
would be that way, and that he was glad he=92d died well.
    After a long talk, he=92d thanked her for coming to=20
him, gravely accepted the packages she had for him, and,=20
when she asked if he knew what he was going to do, had=20
replied, =93Think about it a while.=94
    She=92d driven away with the feeling that he=92d be=20
fighting demons before the year was out. She could see the=20
father=92s sense of duty in the son, and felt that he wouldn=92t=20
let his father down. She didn=92t think she=92d conveyed the fact=20
that his father would have understood if he=92d refused. In=20
the end, she wished him luck and went on her way.
    She pulled into a motel somewhere west of=20
Indianapolis. She signed in under her fake id=92s name and=20
paid in cash.
    Her room was small, and had last been furnished in=20
the fifties, but it had a bed and a bath, and that was all she=20
really needed tonight.
    She tossed her bag onto the bed, then pulled her=20
sword out of it=92s scabbard and sat on the end of the bed, just=20
looking at it for the first time since Rick had died.
    It was the reforged one. She=92d given a lot of thought=20
to which one to keep and which one to give to Rick=92s son,=20
and in the end had decided that this one suited her better.
    She was still a little raw inside, and maybe she=20
always would be, but she felt pretty much back to normal.
    She=92d gone to Dayton, and even with everything that=20
had happened there, she=92d healed. And she=92d finally made a=20
decision about what she was going to do from here.
    She leaned over the bed and picked up the phone,=20
dialing the number she=92d longed to dial for weeks, but only=20
now feeling ready to handle the repercussions.
    The phone on the other end rang and a familiar=20
voice answered, =93Hello?=94
    =93Willow,=94 Buffy began, =93It=92s me.=94
    =93Buffy?=94 Willow exclaimed, hyperventilating, =93Buffy!=20
Oz, it=92s Buffy. Calling on the phone from another phone to=20
talk to me on the phone. I need to sit down now.=94
    =93Calm down, Will,=94 Buffy said, =93I=92m on my way=20
home.=94
    She knew that going home would be hard.=20
    Everything had been left pretty much up in the air.=20
She didn=92t even have a place to stay when she got there.
    But she knew that whatever else happened, she was=20
the Slayer -- no matter where she lived. And she also knew=20
that even the Slayer needed friends, and hers were in=20
Sunnydale. They were hurt and worried on her account, but=20
they were still her friends and she=92d do what she had to do=20
to make amends.
    *Well, Rick,* she thought with a smile, *I guess you=20
finally got me to listen to you.*
    She turned her attention back to her friend.
    =93What have I been doing all this time?=94 she replied=20
to the babbling voice on the other end of the phone,=20
=93Healing, mostly.=94

end



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: LDS <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Unravelling the Depths (1/7)
Date: 02 Jun 1998 23:13:22

Title:     Unravelling the Depths (1/7)
Author:     Dawn Steele
e-mail:     [e-mail]
Summary:    Giles' POV in Nightmares (1st season spoilers)

Feedback:    Yes please. Good or bad. ;-)
Distribution:  SunS page
Disclaimers:  Not mine! Dialogue recognized is from Nightmares, and written
by someone else who did a good job and got paid for it.  Anything you don't
recognize is mine.

Random babbling explanation:  Written in response to the SunS Chaos POV
challenge (http://www.enteract.com/~perridox/SunS/). Previously published
in the "An Alternate Viewpoint" fanzine (see
http://members.tripod.com/~natmerc/avzine.html) which is currently out of
print, but will probably do a second run in September. Ok? <g>

And yes -- I <am> a Giles fan.


Unravelling the Depths
By Dawn Steele ([e-mail])
Part 1/7

It started small enough:  small, multi-legged and numerous.

Buffy had informed me of the "spider" incident during the break between
morning classes.  I must confess that I did not think much of the matter.
A fluctuation in Hellmouth energies, a curse cast by someone with more
talent than sense, or at most a minor mischief demon.  The boy, fortunately
enough, had not been harmed or bitten by the poisonous spiders, and I
merely put it on my long list of items to research.

The air-conditioned back room holds many of my own private volumes,
and at first it was... enjoyable.  No students asking me inane questions
about how to replace lost school texts, no loud noises, no one to annoy me,
or interrupt my "hunt" for mystical truths.  Time slipped by, and... I
<distinctly> remember turning left towards the exit.   Time for a spot of
tea, and a brief look through the LA morning paper before I continued.

Except the door wasn't there.

Ahead of me was another set of shelves.  Puzzled, I looked through their
contents in order to orient myself.   I knew the volumes -- they were
familiar, but... I couldn't remember where they were located in relation to
the door.  Annoyed now, I started walking briskly through the
bookshelves.  Instead of reaching the far wall, I found a walkway, and
another unit of shelves laid out neatly in front of me.

The lights had somehow dimmed, and I could not see more than a short
distance ahead.  I started walking faster.  Everytime I thought I was
finally reaching a wall, or caught sight of a door, another set of
bookshelves would appear in front of me.

I... I do not know how long I was there.  How long I was "lost", although
it seemed to go on forever.  It was such a ridiculous situation.  The room
was not <that> large, and I should have been able to find my way easily.
Except I... I couldn't.

Buffy saved me.  She never knew it, and I would be the last one to inform
her that she had rescued her Watcher yet <again>.  After all -- it was
supposed to be the other way around.  In all my time growing up, in all my
research, no one had ever bothered to point out that <training> did not
always correspond to reality.

The deep silence that had surrounded me was broken by the familiar sound
of her voice.  I could identify it with surety; her voice a beacon within
the maze of books and musty air... leading me outside.  She had entered the
library and was talking to Willow and Xander.  With their voices as a
guide, I turned the right way and found the door immediately in front of
me.

I rushed out, glad to see the sun shining through the ridiculous skylight
positioned above the library.   Americans, and their love for sunlight.
Just then I did not care how much it was damaging the books -- all I cared
about was that it was there, I was out of that blasted back room, and Buffy
was looking up at me from the lower level.

"Hey, Giles.  Wakey, wakey."  Buffy stepped forward, still looking up at
me.

"I was... in the stacks... lost."  I turned back to the storage area, still
puzzled and a bit bewildered.  Already the memory of it was fading.  Surely
I couldn't have been lost?  That would have been ridiculous.  Deep in
thought, it took a moment for Xander's next words to penetrate.

"Did you find any theories about spiders coming out of books?  Big...
hairy... crawley..."

A pause and more noises below.   Some sort of slapping sound, perhaps.  I
turned to look down at the main level.

"It's funny if you're me!"  Xander's face was a mixture of glee and false
apologies.  He must have been teasing Willow again.

"I couldn't find anything, uh... particularly illuminating.  Um... I think
you'd best have a chat with Wendell himself."  The boy should be able to
add details that would help narrow down the search.  Give reasons as to why
he had been singled out.

"Okay," Buffy replied.  "If he can still talk."

They left me, and I turned towards the back room.  I still needed to find
that volume on minor curses.  Later -- I would find it later.  The
incident, although surely a figment of my imagination, had been
disquieting.  It was past time for tea, and I also needed to finish up some
paperwork.  I went downstairs, and looked into my office.  Books were
everywhere, and the sunlight never seemed to penetrate this far into the
library.

Whatever had happened, <if> it had happened, could wait until <after>  I
had tea.  Right now I felt a sudden need for the company of other human
beings instead of books.

(end of Part 1/7)
[e-mail]
"I wouldn't be caught dead with a necrophiliac."







-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: LDS <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Unravelling the Depths (2/7)
Date: 02 Jun 1998 23:30:35

Title:     Unravelling the Depths (2/7)
Author:     Dawn Steele
e-mail:     [e-mail]
Summary:    Giles' POV in Nightmares (1st season spoilers)

Feedback:    Yes please. Good or bad. ;-)
Distribution:  SunS page
Disclaimers:  Not mine! Dialogue recognized is from Nightmares, and written
by someone else who did a good job and got paid for it.  Anything you don't
recognize is mine.

Random babbling explanation:  Written in response to the SunS Chaos POV
challenge (http://www.enteract.com/~perridox/SunS/). Previously published
in the "An Alternate Viewpoint" fanzine (see
http://members.tripod.com/~natmerc/avzine.html) which is currently out of
print, but will probably do a second run in September. Ok? <g>

Unravelling the Depths
By Dawn Steele ([e-mail])
Part 2/7

I heard about the girl being beaten while I was talking to the Mathematics
instructor in the teacher's lounge.  Normally an interesting man, he was
being particularly ghoulish at describing the details of the girl's
injuries; expounding upon them at great length.  As one who has seen more
than his fair share of death and mutilations, I was not amused, and cut
short the conversation as soon as I gathered the pertinent details.

It did not seem to be connected to the spider attack earlier, and was
likely an unfortunate example of random violence; perhaps revenge from a
discarded boyfriend, or a jealous schoolmate.  Unfortunate, but not tied to
the mystical influence of the Hellmouth.

Buffy insisted on "checking it out", however, and I drove her over to the
hospital during the school lunch hour.  We stopped at the flower shop, and
I picked up a small flower pot of yellow carnations.  Live flowers instead
of cut ones that would wither and die in a few days.  I have always hated
cut flowers.

"Xander said that Chuck said she was pretty beaten up." Buffy paused,
checking the plaque of room numbers on the wall to orient herself.  "She
was unconscious when the ambulance took her to the hospital during second
period."

"Do you know the girl?"  I hoped not.

"Just to say æhi' to," Buffy said.  "Laura's nice enough.  Nobody saw who
attacked her?"

"I was rather hoping that Laura did."  The last few days had been so quiet,
so "normal".  A pleasant change from our "usual", and it was still possible
it would be an uneventful day.

We came up to Laura's room, and Buffy stepped forward ahead of me
through the doorway.  Laura was lying in the hospital bed, pink bed sheets
tucked about her and an IV tube attached to her left arm.  A white hospital
nightgown with small blue dots made her face look pale, and drawn.

Laura must have heard us enter, because she turned towards us.  I realized
that the Mathematics instructor had been accurate in his accounting.  Her
face, particularly the left side, was covered in bruises, and she had a
large bandage covering what was likely a bad cut positioned right beside
her right eye.  Seeing her there... it reminded me of all the times I
worried about finding Buffy in such a state after a night of hunting
vampires, although Buffy's natural resilience and quick healing made most
minor injuries... well -- minor.  Laura, on the other hand, had no
supernatural protection against injury.  Her eyes, when I looked into them,
were dark, and... scared.

"Hey, Laura."  Buffy's voice was gentle, and non threatening.  Just a
fellow school-mate accompanying a teacher to represent the best wishes of
the school.

"Hi."

"Hope we're not intruding..." I belatedly remembered the flowers I was
holding, and handed them over to Buffy for her to place on the end table.

"That's okay... I don't want to be left alone."

Although now facing us, Laura did not move much in the hospital bed.
Clearly her injuries were painful.  Where was her family?  Surely they had
been notified?  Why <had> she been left alone?  "You understand that we're
anxious this... this doesn't happen again."

Awkwardly, I pushed my hands into my pants pockets so I wouldn't have to
figure out what to do with them.  It was a bad situation.  I hated awkward
conversations like these.  Buffy, on the other hand, seemed more at ease,
and more willing to force Laura to remember what had to be horrible
memories.  In this case, as in so many others, I let Buffy take the lead.

"Can you tell us what happened?"

Laura's eyes flickered, looking away from us.  "I was in the basement."
She was now peering directly into Buffy's eyes.  A touch of embarassment at
the revelation of broken school rules touched fer face.  "I went down for a
smoke... There was someone there."

"Someone you knew?"

Laura shook her head.  "I've never seen <anything> like it."

Buffy turned to me briefly, eyes full of questions.  Had it been a vampire?
It had been full daylight, and there was no place for it to hide when the
ambulance crew and the police had gone down into the basement.  But if
not a vampire, and not a human, where had the creature gone?

"It?" A single word, but Buffy was asking Laura so much....

I leaned down towards the hospital bed.  Intent now; this was clearly
something we <must> investigate.  "Can you describe it?"

She tried.  I saw her start and stop a few times.  It must have been both
frightening and frustrating.  No doubt the police had already questioned
her thoroughly, and now members of her own school were demanding answers.
Answers we <had> to have -- but ones we were not likely to get while she
was in such a state.  I might have gone forward, and insisted, but....

"Hey!  That's okay.  Don't worry about it."  Buffy ending the questioning
before Laura even got a chance to speak.

Perhaps she was right. We wouldn't be able to get information out of her
right now.  She was too scared; it was too recent.  "Yes.  You... you just
rest now."  It was time to retreat:  time for research.

Buffy picked up her jacket.  "You know that...."

A nurse came into the room from the door behind me.  Her presence an
indication that our allotted "visitor's time" was apparently up.  "Hi,
Laura."

Buffy, ignoring the interruption, continued on.  "If you remember anything,
you can tell us.  Even if it may seem weird."

The nurse spoke again, her voice intruding on the connection Buffy had
established with Laura.  "She needs her rest now."

With the nurse now keeping Laura company, we turned to leave, and my
thoughts were already on the search ahead of me.  Whatever "It" was, we
had no description, no details except that it had been able to beat a young
healthy girl into unconsciousness with ease.  There were far too many
possibilities....

"Lucky 19."

Laura's voice caused both of us to stop and turn back.  "I'm sorry?"  I
took a step back until I was right behind Buffy.  This could be important.

"It's what he said... right before... He said 'Lucky 19'."  Laura's voice
was soft, embarrassed almost.  "That's weird, right?"

"Yes.  Yes, it is."  Not only was it strange, but it bore no relation to my
tentative assignment of a malignant demon's presence in the school.
Perhaps I would look into the Numerology sections first?

"Feel better."  Buffy turned again to leave.

Looking at Laura lying there in the hospital bed, I felt helpless.  There
was nothing I could do for her.  Tracking down this monster, whatever it
may be, would not help her heal any faster, but it might prevent another
student from being hurt or killed.  "Take care."

An inane statement, but what <could> you say to someone in that condition?
We hurried out into the hallway, and Buffy quickly tracked down Laura's
attending physician.  He seemed in a hurry.  A tall, bald man in his
forties, he strode through the hospital corridors, open clipboard in hand,
and we were forced to lag behind him.

"Doctor?  Is she going to be all right?"  I hoped she would be.  Hoped this
was one attack that would not leave a fatal or disabling legacy.

"You family?"

"Friends," Buffy answered.  She was striding just behind him, almost
clipping his heels, although the doctor's bulk dwarfed hers.

"She'll recover.  She's got a couple of shattered bones, a little internal
bleeding -- she got off pretty easy."

"Easy?"  Buffy's voice showcased her incredulity.

I remembered Laura's face back there in the hospital room, and the careful
way she stayed still so that she would not hurt any more than necessary...
I agreed with Buffy.  The scared look in Laura's eyes... "Have you looked up
the word lately?"

"Well -- the first one's still in a coma."  The doctor stopped in front of
an observation window, and Buffy moved to look through it.  A boy lay in a
private room inside, his face turned away from us.  He appeared to be
asleep.

"First what?" Buffy demanded.

"First victim."  The doctor pointed towards the young man lying completely
still beyond the glass window.  "They found him a week ago.  Exact same
M.O. as the girl except only he's in worst shape.  If he doesn't wake up
soon..."  His voice deepened and grew rougher.  "Somebody's got to stop
this guy."

"Somebody will."

Buffy echoed my own thoughts.  Whoever, or whatever, this monster was, we
would track it down and stop it.

Parting ways with Laura's doctor, I hurried Buffy back towards the parking
area.  The lunch hour was quickly passing.  She needed to be back in
school, and I needed to get back to my library.

Time moved inevitably on, and we still had no idea what was truly happening.

(end of Part 2/7)








-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: LDS <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Unravelling the Depths (3/7)
Date: 02 Jun 1998 23:39:02

Title:     Unravelling the Depths (3/7)
Author:     Dawn Steele
e-mail:     [e-mail]
Summary:    Giles' POV in Nightmares (1st season spoilers)

Feedback:    Yes please. Good or bad. ;-)
Distribution:  SunS page
Disclaimers:  Not mine! Dialogue recognized is from Nightmares, and written
by someone else who did a good job and got paid for it.  Anything you don't
recognize is mine.

Random babbling explanation:  Written in response to the SunS Chaos POV
challenge (http://www.enteract.com/~perridox/SunS/). Previously published
in the "An Alternate Viewpoint" fanzine (see
http://members.tripod.com/~natmerc/avzine.html) which is currently out of
print, but will probably do a second run in September. Ok? <g>

Unravelling the Depths
By Dawn Steele ([e-mail])
Part 3/7

The remainder of lunch was uneventful.  I managed to get Buffy back well
before the bell rang for her afternoon classes, and finished eating my own
packed lunch in a hurry.

The school had the local newspaper, The Sunnydale Press, delivered to the
library each day for the rare cases in which students needed it for
research purposes.  If some monster or demon was terrorising the town,
there was a chance it had started earlier on non-human victims, gradually
building up in both scale and viciousness.  The attacks would have been
reported.

As far as newspapers go, it was a fairly mediocre one, but all that could
be expected in a relatively small town like Sunnydale.  It usually ran to
two thin sections, and managed to pack most world events onto the second
page. The remainder was filled with local "news", and a large sports
section. Normally, my research material was far older, and far more
interesting.

I spread out the newspapers onto one of the student tables, ready to skim
through them for anything that would relate to Laura's attack.

The headline blurred before me, the letters wavering and turning into
squiggles before my eyes.  Blinking, I found my eyes filled with tears, as
if dust had gotten into them.  Perhaps my glasses were dirty.

A quick trip to my desk, and I carefully wiped my glasses off.  Slipping
them back on, I picked up my notepad.  While here, I wanted to write down
ideas for later perusal in the stacks.  There was still a chance we were
dealing with some sort of mischief demon, or perhaps an ogre had attacked
Laura.  Although there was no indication that, whatever it was, had tried
to eat Laura, there was the chance it had been scared away before it had
the time.

My own handwriting... writhed.  There really is no other way to describe
it. Twisting in front of me, the words appeared to be in a foreign
language.  I grabbed a pen, and tried to write.

I couldn't.

I couldn't remember how to form the letters....

Sweat gathered underneath my arms, and my palms grew damp.  Something was
wrong, something was dreadfully, impossibly wrong.  Books were my life, my
main tool as a Watcher.  How could I function without them?

In desperation, I started thumbing through the books on my desk.  English,
Latin, German... none of them made sense!  I threw one of the books onto
the floor.  I... I cannot say which one, because I could not read the cover
to identify it.

A ridiculous state of affairs, but... I sighed and rubbed my eyes again,
before slipping my glasses firmly back on.  The Sunnydale Press, rag though
it was, was written in plain English.  I would try again with that.

I spent the next five, perhaps ten minutes peering at the newspapers, and
stayed glued to them despite the urge to get as far away as possible.
Trying to focus on the captions, and even determining the print date had
turned into an impossible task.  The only thing I succeeded in doing was
scattering them across the table into a jumbled mess, and to give myself a
dreadful headache.

"This can't be!"  Desperate thoughts turned to who might have cursed me,
and spells that might reverse whatever the problem was -- but how would I
read the spellbook?  Who could I get to help me?  Ms. Calendar?

Behind me, I heard the library doors open, and the click of heels against
the tile floors.

"What's the word?"

It was Buffy.  Coming to check on my research.  Expecting answers I
couldn't give her.  "Oh... I've got back issues of the paper."  I lifted up
the one in front of me and peered at the front page.  As if it would
magically make sense now that she had arrived.  "Trying to do some
research."

She moved up next to me.  "Did you find anything?"

I coughed, clearing my throat.  "I don't know."

"You don't know if you didn't find anything?"

"Having a problem."  This was impossible.  I wouldn't believe it except it
was happening to me -- right now.

"What is it?"  Buffy's voice was questioning, but not worried.  Why should
she be?  I had never had this problem before.

"I... I can't read."  He turned to look at her.  Having admitted it seemed
to solidify the problem; make it real in a sense that it wasn't before.

"What do you mean?"  Incredulous now.  "You can read like, three
languages."

"Five actually."  I smiled briefly.  Five working on twenty-seven if you
counted the grammatical variations through the centuries.  "On a normal
day."  I looked closely at the newspaper in front of me.  Even the
pictures... "The words here don't many any sense."

I threw down the paper in disgust, and walked away from the table.  Closing
my eyes, I focussed on trying to relax, and think the matter through.
Behind me, I heard the rustle of papers as Buffy looked at them.

"That's him..."

"Who?"  Did I care?

"The kid I've been seeing around school."  Buffy's voice changed, acquiring
a different cadence as she started reading from the paper.  " '12 year-old
Billy Palmer was found beaten and unconscious after his kiddy league game
Saturday.  Doctors describe his condition as critical.'  When was this
published?"

I watched her eyes turn towards the corner where the paper held the date.
Why could she read it and not me?  At the moment, the world seemed
perverse and unfair.

"... last week.  Says he's in a coma in... intensive care."

Stepping up behind her, I looked at the paper she was reading.  It was
still a mess of letters that made no sense... at least to me, but what
Buffy was reading sounded familiar... a connection to the boy they'd seen
in the hospital?  "The first victim?  You've seen him around the school?"

"Yeah.  First when the spiders got Wendell, and then when I didn't know
anything on the history test.  I thought it was weird seeing this kid
around, but I... forgot about it."

My mind raced, and I raised a hand to stop her talking for a moment.
"The... the boy's been in a coma for a week.  How could this be possible?"

"What am I?  Knowledge girl now?  Explanations are your terrain."

Yes, they were.  Kind of her to point that out.  I took off my glasses, and
turned my mind away from the disquieting newspapers. I looked at the few
clues we had as a whole, and was relieved to discover that my knowledge,
unlike my ability to read, appeared to be in working order.  "Well, um...
there's astral projection.  The theory that while one sleeps, one has
another body -- an astral body -- that can travel through time and space."

"Billy's in a coma, and that's like sleep, right?"

"In a manner of speaking." I cleared my throat again.  "Only one doesn't
always awake from a coma."

"Could I be seeing Billy's asteroid body?"

Asteroid body?  Surely growing up in LA, she had heard the term before?
Apparently not.  "Astral body, and I..."  She gave me one of those
exasperated "what does it matter" looks.  Ignoring it, I continued on.
"... I don't know.  As usual one doesn't have... an inordinate amount of
information to work with."

Standing back up, I looked at the books surrounding me.  There were plenty
of "New Age" books I could study, but not many that were reliable.

"Lucky 19..."

Turning around, I saw Buffy was looking at the newspaper again.

Suddenly, I heard the library doors being pushed open, and a rather tall,
stocky man walked through.  "There you are!  I've been looking
everywhere..."  He appeared to be addressing Buffy...  I slipped on my
glasses in order to get a better look.

"Why aren't you in class?"  The man was smiling, but his tone....

Buffy rushed over to meet him.  "Dad.  What are you doing here?"

<This> was Buffy's father?  Unexpectedly, I felt a wave of... an emotion I
didn't want to identify, pass through me.  I had never expected to meet the
man, Buffy's father.  The one who had raised her in her formative years,
when she should have been under the safe care and strict tutelage of a
Watcher.

"You're not supposed to pick me up till after school."  Barely pausing for
a breath, Buffy quickly added, "is something wrong?"

Buffy appeared worried, hesitant almost.  I wasn't used to seeing her
this... fragile.  I realized that despite the long hours we spent together,
she had never really spoken of her father.  I didn't know how well their
relationship was.  She had told me he would be picking her up for the
weekend, but....

"Well... I had to talk to you."  The man was smiling.  It was a familiar
smile, and its confidence looked out of place next to Buffy's worried
visage.

"Something is wrong... Is it Mom?"

"No, no -- it's not your mother.  She's fine."  He leaned forward until his
face was next to Buffy's and lowered his voice until I could barely hear
him.  "Can I speak with you for a moment?  Privately?

"Uh, sure.  Yeah."

She turned towards me, and her face lit up.  There really is no other way
to describe it.  A bit bewildered at the abrupt transition, I was
unprepared for her to grab her father's arm, and drag him forward.

"Oh!  I'm sorry.  Dad, this is Mr. Giles -- the librarian."  Her voice
sounded proud to make the introduction, and he reached forward to shake my
hand.

The librarian?  Oh... yes.  I suppose I would be "the librarian" to her
father. Just another one of her teachers... I smiled a bit idiotically, and
found myself in a minor tussle of grips as we tested each other's strength.

"My pleasure."  I managed to utter it while the smile was still on my face,
and my fingers were being squeezed together into a pulp.

"Likewise."

Buffy reached forward and grabbed her jacket.  "I'll be back."

I watched as they headed briskly towards the doorway.  Side by side, they
appeared very dissimilar, the only resemblance in the colour of their hair,
and their confident smiles.  Except... Buffy's smile during most of the
conversation had been noticeably absent.

Still -- he was her father, and with Buffy living with her mother instead
of in my care, I had no real "right" to question her relationship with her
parents unless it affected her duties as the Slayer.  No right at all.

Turning back to the newspapers, I picked one up and peered at the spot
where the headline should have been.  Squinting, I saw the letters swim,
and then... reassemble into normal New York Times lettering.

Closing my eyes in relief, I felt a deep shudder pass through my body. That
experience, whatever had caused it, had been more <disquieting> than I
cared to think about.  With the newspaper clenched in my fist, I walked
back into my office, and sat down in my chair.  I let  the newspaper drop
onto the table, and spent a minute running my fingers through my hair, and
concentrating on taking deep, calming breaths.

Feeling more myself again, I lifted up the front of the newspaper, and
identified the article that Buffy had been looking at -- reading the sparse
details over and over again with a thoroughness that had nothing to do with
a desire for knowing all the reported facts.

Perhaps it <was> the boy's astral body that Buffy was seeing.  The boy may
have been nominally psychic before the accident, and the energy of the
Hellmouth was allowing his astral body to roam free.  It still didn't
explain the incident with the spiders, or Laura's attack.

Letting the paper fall again, I reached over to thumb through the books I
had tossed aside earlier.  After reassuring myself that my eyes were
functioning normally, and that I hadn't suddenly gone mad, I decided to
take a break before continuing on.

A nice pot of soothing tea, my second of the day and my home country's
general "cure all", would be a pleasant reward to myself for not falling
apart -- before I tried to delve into "New Age" pulp written by idiots with
no real credentials or actual experience.

(end of part 3/7)





[e-mail]
"I wouldn't be caught dead with a necrophiliac."







-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: LDS <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Unravelling the Depths (4/7)
Date: 02 Jun 1998 23:45:36

Title:     Unravelling the Depths (4/7)
Author:     Dawn Steele
e-mail:     [e-mail]
Summary:    Giles' POV in Nightmares (1st season spoilers)

Feedback:    Yes please. Good or bad. ;-)
Distribution:  SunS page
Disclaimers:  Not mine! Dialogue recognized is from Nightmares, and written
by someone else who did a good job and got paid for it.  Anything you don't
recognize is mine.

Random babbling explanation:  Written in response to the SunS Chaos POV
challenge (http://www.enteract.com/~perridox/SunS/). Previously published
in the "An Alternate Viewpoint" fanzine (see
http://members.tripod.com/~natmerc/avzine.html) which is currently out of
print, but will probably do a second run in September. Ok? <g>


Unravelling the Depths
By Dawn Steele ([e-mail])
Part 4/7

I was finished my first cup of tea, and just about to pour a second when
Willow and Xander barged their way into the library -- noisily.

"Red alert!  Where's Buffy?"  Xander said.

Glancing over, I saw Xander finish pulling on one of the maroon Sunnydale
High t-shirts. "She... she just stepped out.  Her... her father came by."
Whatever had happened to that awful printed monstrosity Xander was
wearing earlier?  "He... he needed to talk with her.  Where are your other
clothes?"

"Oh!  Don't I wish I had the answer to that question!"  Xander appeared to
be in quite an exited state.  Even more exited than usual.

I stirred my tea, and let them continue with their explanation.  This
sounded interesting. Willow, appearing more amused than anything else,
started giving me the actual details of what had happened.  "Xander kinda
found himself in front of our class... not wearing much of anything."

"Except my underwear!"  Xander pointed out, now looking quite disgusted.

"Yeah!  It was really... " She glanced at Xander who was frowning at her
amused tone, "... bad.  It was a <bad> thing."

"Bad thing?  I was naked!  Bad thing doesn't cover it!"

Taking the spoon out of the glass, I set the tea cup on a coaster.  With
any luck, this explanation would only take a few minutes, and I would still
be able to enjoy it.

"Everyone staring... I would hate to have everyone pay attention to <me>
like that."  Willow's voice had grown softer.

"With nudity!  It was a total nightmare!"

I watched as Willow's face started to show... realization.  She had thought
of something.  "Well yeah, Xander.  It... It's your nightmare."

Nightmare?  Xander's nightmare, Wendell's nightmare... Perhaps...?

" 'Cept the part with me waking up going 'it's all a dream' "  He looked at
me pointedly.  "It happened!"

"Like it happened to Wendell!  That thing with the spiders?  Wendell had a
recurring dream about that."

"I... I dreamt that I... I got lost in the stacks."  In a daze, I walked
through the short corridor from my office and into the main library area.
This was important... and as the truth became stunningly obvious, I felt so
incredibly <stupid>.  "... and I... I couldn't."

In aggravation, I slammed a fist down onto the table beside me.  "Of
course!"  Turning, I looked down at the newspapers.  Both incidents, the
one in the stacks and the problem with reading, were now explained.  Even
the fear, the worry, and the inability to think coherently that had
consumed me -- were just part and parcel of a nightmare becoming reality.

"Uh... our dreams are coming true?"

I could always count on Xander being two steps behind.  "Dreams?  That
would be a musical comedy version of this... Nightmares -- our nightmares
are coming true!"

My eyes unfocussed as I thought of the possibilities... people's darkest
dreams taking shape, and intruding onto the streets of Sunnydale.

"So why is this happening?"

Still lost in thought, I answered Xander's question absently.  "Billy."

"Well.  That explanation was shorter than usual."  Xander turned to look
down at Willow and said sarcastically, "it's Billy." Turning back to me,
his tone became demanding.  "Who's Billy?"

"He's a boy in the local hospital.  He was beaten.  He's in a coma."
Without thinking, I stepped towards them, eyes looking past them and into
my office.  There was a volume somewhere in there dealing with the psychic
effect of trauma on reality... "Uh... Somehow, I think he's crossed over
 from the nightmare world he's trapped in."

"And he brought the nightmare world with him.  Thanks a bunch, Billy."

Willow's eyes were puzzled.  "How could he <do> that?"

How indeed?  Rather, how to explain in less than three hours?  "Things like
that are easy when you live on a Hellmouth."

"Well, uh..." Xander picked pointedly at the front of his new t-shirt, "we
have to stop it."

"And soon... or else everyone in Sunnydale is going to be facing their
own... <worst> nightmares."  I suddenly remembered a few that I didn't want
to repeat.  Or rather... more than a few.  Up till now, I had only
experienced relatively minor nightmares.  What would happen when people's
darker, more intangible fears, started surfacing?

"Any of our nightmares?"  Willow said softly.  I glanced at her.  She
appeared a bit dazed, and... worried.

"The Hellmouth must be amplifying whatever psychic powers Billy has."  My
mind sorted through the possibilities, connecting bits and pieces of
knowledge gleaned through years of study.  "It... it's quite possible, from
the fact that these episodes are occurring more frequently, that they are
now in resonance.  As time passes...."

"Uh!  Resonance?"  At my words, Willow's face had changed from worry, to
fear.

"Resonance.  Fine."  Xander placed his hands on his hips.  "And I should
care, because...?"

"You know, Xander -- that film with the bridge?"  Willow jabbed him in the
ribs.  "They showed it in science class last week."

"What does an old film with a bridge falling down have to do with Billy
turning everyone's insides to the outsides?"

I interrupted.  This was no time for a long explanation.  "They could be in
sync, with the effects growing faster and stronger every second that passes.
Eventually, powered by a direct link to Hell, all of reality and the Astral
plane could merge, and... Billy.  Of course!"  Another link in the puzzle
finally became clear.

"Billy?  All of reality could Billy?"

Ignoring Xander, I continued musing out loud.  "As the Slayer, Buffy must
have a considerably forceful presence on the Astral plane.  <That's> why
she's been seeing Billy.  He would have been drawn to her."

Buffy should have been back by now.  Surely her meeting with her father
wouldn't have gone on this long?  "We need to act <now>."  I headed for the
doorway, knowing Xander and Willow would follow.  When Xander passed me my
scarf, I grabbed it automatically.  "Buffy doesn't know this is
happening, and given the sort of thing she tends to dream about -- it's
<imperative> that we find her"

We were through the doors, and standing just outside the hallway.  Students
were milling about, and for whatever reason, the bells had not yet rung
again to signal the start of classes.

"It'll be faster if we split up to look for her."

Wondering where Buffy would have gone to talk with her father, I slipped on
my scarf, lost in thought.  "Good idea."

Perhaps the cafeteria?  Time was of the essence.  Walking away, I almost
didn't hear Willow's final words.

"Faster, but... not really safer."

                                        *    *    *

The hallways were... strange.  While no one was screaming, there seemed to
be too many people milling about.  Whispering to each other, and giggling
secretively at hidden jokes.  Pushing my way through one small-packed group
that was blocking my way, I concentrated on reaching the cafeteria.  Many
of the students used it as a general gathering place to talk and get food
from the vending machines between classes when they didn't want to go
outside.

There really seemed to be an inordinate amount of students in the hallway.
Why hadn't the bell rung?  The sun must have been blazing outside, because
the temperature had gone from uncomfortably warm in my tweed suit, to
almost unbearable.  Why couldn't Buffy have lived in a more <temperate>
climate?  It was <always> too hot here.

Suddenly, a fight between two students broke out, and I was pushed roughly
against the metal lockers.  They were oblivious to my adult presence, and
the implied authority I possessed.  Jostled hard, It took a minute for me
to catch my breath.  "Excuse me?" Perhaps Principal Snyder would enjoy
interrogating them.  "Stop this fight immediately!"

The students around me... turned and looked right through me; whispering
and laughing.  I still couldn't make out what they were saying.  It was...
frustrating.  The two combatants meanwhile, had been joined by others and
now the numbers involved were increasing.  Arms flailed about, and it was
all that I could do to escape the rapidly widening area of conflict without
receiving more than a few punches.

Annoyed, hot, and very aware of time passing, I continued on.  I couldn't
deal with this now, I had to concentrate on finding Buffy.

I looked past my shoulder, and noticed that the fight continued.  Students
stood all around me, talking and whispering, oblivious to the conflict that
was heading towards them until they had been consumed by the fray.  The
fight seemed to be increasing faster now, heading towards me rapidly.  I
found myself forced to physically move students aside as they ignored me,
and my requests for clear passage, barely keeping ahead of the fight.

Along the way, someone had started playing loud, annoying music, and I felt
the beat of the bass rattle my bones.

I tried to walk faster, but the hallways were getting more crowded even if
that would have seemed impossible moments earlier.  It was almost jammed
packed now.  Bodies pressed against me, hands touching me, and that
<blasted> music making it impossible to think.

With relief, I saw the door for the teacher's lounge ahead, and pushed my
way to it.  The door represented escape from the people intruding all
around me.  Escape, quiet and the comfort of adult conversation.

Except when I got there... it was locked.

I took hold of the door handle, and tried to turn it forcibly.  Locked
shut.  I banged on the door repeatedly, shouting desperated, but there was
no response from anyone inside.  Turning around, there were students as far
as I could see, and the fight was almost at me again.  A mass of young
flesh all set on their own paths, and oblivious to me.

Oblivious.  Billy.  Fighting, and music, and bodies trespassing on my
personal space.  Billy.  Nightmares....

I had to get out of this nightmare.  Had to find the way, the key to the
dream that would let me control it.  Key... Of course!  I forced myself to
calmly turn around, and straighten my jacket.  Reaching into my pocket, I
pulled my ring of keys out, and inserted the correct one into the lock.
The sound of the tumblers falling was audible even over the rock music that
was blasting my through my body.

When I went through the door... I found myself in an empty cafeteria.
Buffy was nowhere to be seen.

(end of part 4/7)





[e-mail]
"I wouldn't be caught dead with a necrophiliac."







-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: LDS <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Unravelling the Depths (5/7)
Date: 02 Jun 1998 23:52:15

Title:     Unravelling the Depths (5/7)
Author:     Dawn Steele
e-mail:     [e-mail]
Summary:    Giles' POV in Nightmares (1st season spoilers)

Feedback:    Yes please. Good or bad. ;-)
Distribution:  SunS page
Disclaimers:  Not mine! Dialogue recognized is from Nightmares, and written
by someone else who did a good job and got paid for it.  Anything you don't
recognize is mine.

Random babbling explanation:  Written in response to the SunS Chaos POV
challenge (http://www.enteract.com/~perridox/SunS/). Previously published
in the "An Alternate Viewpoint" fanzine (see
http://members.tripod.com/~natmerc/avzine.html) which is currently out of
print, but will probably do a second run in September. Ok? <g>


Unravelling the Depths
By Dawn Steele ([e-mail])
Part 5/7

Finally giving up on finding Buffy, I started searching for Willow and
Xander instead.  Remarkably, as soon as I made the decision, I spotted
Xander's distinctive maroon outfit heading towards me.  Passing through
some sort of plastic that was hanging from the ceiling, I saw both of them
running straight at me.  "No sign of Buffy?"

They grabbed my arms, and started yelling as they pulled me backwards.
Then I noticed... a deranged clown with a large knife, coming at us intent
on murder.  "Uh..."

Deciding that retreat was the better part of valour in this case, I swiftly
turned around, and quickly caught up with Xander and Willow.  We were
running through yet another plastic barrier when I sensed Xander stopping
abruptly.  I was just about to yell at him to come, when... he threw a
punch that had the clown falling backwards and knocked him spread-eagled
onto the floor.

"You were a lousy clown!" Xander was shaking his fist to emphasize his
points.  "Your balloon animals were pathetic!  Everyone can make a
giraffe!"

Leaving the clown behind, Xander joined Willow and I, and we all headed
towards the exit of the school.  It was only after we had reached the
outside, and past the final plastic sheets coming down outside the building
that I realized we must have been in one of Xander's nightmares.  His next
words confirmed it.  Swept up in his dream, I had had little control over
my own actions.  Reality had bent and I had been a helpless, frightened
pawn.

"I feel good.  I feel liberated!"

A couple of screaming students jostled me as they passed behind me, but I
determinedly did not look to see what they were running from.  My own
nightmares were bad enough, I did not intend to find myself in someone
else's again.  The seeming inability to control my own actions had been...
quite awful.

"You seem to be the only one..." I looked at Willow.  Instead of her black
dotted dress and red sweater, she was garbed in a turquoise oriental outfit
with a red band around her waist.  Her hair was in a tight topknot, and her
face was covered in a thick layer of makeup.  It seemed Xander and I
weren't the only ones who had encountered Billy's influence.  "Things are
getting worse.  In a few hours reality will fall completely into the realm
of nightmares."

"What do we do?" Willow said.

"The only thing I can think of is to try, and wake Billy."  With Billy
awake, he would not be linked to the realm of nightmares, and reality
should once again take hold.  It <would> have to take hold.  If the effects
of the nightmares were permanent... I didn't want to think about it.

"No!" Xander protested.  "We can't leave without Buffy!"

"Agreed!" As if I would?  We needed to find her <immediately>.  "But who
knows where she might have gone?"

"Excuse me?  When did they put a cemetery in across the street?"

I looked to where Willow was pointing, and saw a rolling mass of darkness
enclosing a dark cemetery.  Night was being held firmly in place despite
the hot sun overhead.  This was not good, not good at all.

"And when did they make it night over there?"  Xander said.

There was really no question where we had to look for Buffy.  Remembering
more than one nightmare I had had that took place in a cemetery at night...
I had to force myself to walk faster rather than to turn around, and
pretend to myself that Buffy could still be somewhere inside the school.

Willow and Xander walked beside me.  I was glad they were there, and glad
despite myself, that they had persisted in helping Buffy in her trials
since discovering she was the Slayer.  It meant more worry late at night
when I thought of the danger they were placing themselves in, but... if it
meant Buffy's life was even marginally safer, I was willing to live with
it.

We stepped through the cemetery gate, and night enfolded us.  The grass was
springy beneath my feet, and we walked without talking.
"Whose nightmare is this?" Xander commented.  As if there was any doubt.

I think I saw it first.

I <know> I saw it first.

"It's mine."  Disbelieving, I knelt down by the fresh grave, heedless of
the soil grinding itself into my pants.  My eyes read the inscription on
the headstone, read it so <easily> now that I wished I could go blind.
'Buffy Summers, 1981 - 1997, Rest in Peace'.  The words were a mockery.
Sixteen years old, and....

"I failed... in my duty to protect you."  I let myself sigh deeply in
misery.  "I should have been more... cautious... taken more time to train
you." My heart felt still and heavy in my chest.  How could Buffy be dead?
 Her life was so bright and warm -- giving my own much more carefully led
life joy and meaning.  "But you were so gifted... and the evil was so
great."

I touched the fresh earth, and prayed desperately to all the gods that this
was <my> nightmare, that Buffy was somewhere else -- anywhere else -- and
hadn't been affected.  "I'm sorry."

A hand reached out of the dirt, and latched onto my own.

Scrambling backwards, I half-pulled, and half-pushed myself away.  Stepping
back until I was almost next to Xander and Willow, I... I recognized her,
and relief blossomed within me.  My nightmare <must> have ended, and Buffy
was here!

Buffy stood there, head down, and brushed the loose dirt off her clothing.
Apparently she was concerned with her appearance even at a time like this.
When she should have been... Just what had happened to her?

"Buffy?"  Responding to my call, she looked up, smiled, and my soul turned
to ice.  Her face was that of a vampire, with sharpened teeth, and glowing
eyes.

"I thought I was dead!"  The happiness expressed in her voice made the
demonic folds on her face twist oddly.

"Buffy -- your face!"  Willow sounded scared.

<I> was scared.

Her hands spread over her face, feeling the folds and twists of unfamiliar
tissue.  She knew what had happened.  "Oh, God."

I watched her shoulders start to shake.  This wasn't my nightmare at all --
it was hers, and I couldn't think of anything I could do to help her.

"Buffy?" Xander reached out a hand, but Buffy turned away from them.
Hiding her face.

I <had> to help her -- there was no choice.  Without her help, we might not
be able to reach Billy. Without her will actively fighting against the
vampirish state she found herself in -- we could be all in trouble.
Without... my help, she might not be able to survive.

"You never told me you dreamt of becoming a vampire."  I stepped up
close beside her;  hopefully, reassuringly close.

She shook her head, denying my words.  "This isn't a dream."

If the whole situation hadn't been so bloody <fragile>, I would have
laughed. "No... no it's not."  Moving around her, I positioned myself in
front of her.  Her head was down, and she wasn't looking at me.  "But
there's a chance we can make it go <away>."

I leaned down, my head next to hers.  "This <all> comes from Billy.  Now if
we can only wake him up... I believe..." I <had> to believe, "... the
nightmares will stop and reality will shift back into place -- but we
<must> do it now!"

<Give her a moment to focus,> I told myself.  <Give her a goal to hold on
to>.

"I need you to hold together long enough to help us..." Helping others was
ingrained in her very being.  Part and parcel of her personality.  She
could do it.  "Can you do that?"

She looked up at me, and I saw her -- saw the real Buffy through the guise
of the monster that wore her face.  Buffy was scared, but she was fighting
it.  She nodded, and when she spoke, her voice was rough with effort.
"Yeah, I think I can."

"Thank you."  I glanced up at Willow and Xander to see how they were
taking all this.  Shock was perhaps the best description.

Buffy followed my glance, looking over at them.  "But we better hurry --
'cause I'm getting hungry."

She strode off, Xander following close behind her.  "That's a... a joke,
right?"

I didn't hear Buffy's reply, if she made one.  Forcing myself to place one
foot in front of the other, I followed them.  We <had> to get to the
hospital.

Willow started walking beside me.  "Are you sure everything will go back
once he's awake?"

"Oh?" It took a moment for her words to register.  Of <course> I wasn't
sure!  A lie was the only answer. "Ah... positive."

"Well how do we wake Billy up?"  She was clearly excited, and thinking
up possibilities that I didn't even want to consider.  "What if we <can't>?"

"Willow?  <Do> shut up."

I could see Buffy's figure ahead of us, walking rapidly back towards the
school grounds.  I hoped she was heading towards my car.

(end of part 5/7)





[e-mail]
"I wouldn't be caught dead with a necrophiliac."







-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: LDS <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Unravelling the Depths (6/7)
Date: 02 Jun 1998 23:57:07

Title:     Unravelling the Depths (6/7)
Author:     Dawn Steele
e-mail:     [e-mail]
Summary:    Giles' POV in Nightmares (1st season spoilers)

Feedback:    Yes please. Good or bad. ;-)
Distribution:  SunS page
Disclaimers:  Not mine! Dialogue recognized is from Nightmares, and written
by someone else who did a good job and got paid for it.  Anything you don't
recognize is mine.

Random babbling explanation:  Written in response to the SunS Chaos POV
challenge (http://www.enteract.com/~perridox/SunS/). Previously published
in the "An Alternate Viewpoint" fanzine (see
http://members.tripod.com/~natmerc/avzine.html) which is currently out of
print, but will probably do a second run in September. Ok? <g>


Unravelling the Depths
By Dawn Steele ([e-mail])
Part 6/7

After a very unpleasant ride all cramped together in my car, with Buffy's
eyes returning repeatedly to my neck, we arrived to find seemingly the
whole hospital screaming.  Orderlies, nurses, doctors, and all the
ambulatory patients were running through the halls.  Here, close to Billy's
influence, the nightmares must be continuous by now.

Running down the hallway towards where I remembered Billy's room to be, I
saw the doctor who was treating Billy.  "Doctor!  Is the boy Billy still
here..." My voice trailed off as I got a better look at him.  He was in his
own world, staring at the misshapen lumps of what used to be his hands.

"My hands..." Ignoring us, the doctor moved on down the hallway.

Spotting the door to Billy's room, I hurried through it and moved to the
right side of his bed, with Xander right behind me.  Willow went to the
other side by the window, and Buffy stayed next to the door.  All ready,
positioned for action, and... helpless.

"What now?"

What indeed, Xander.  What indeed.  "Um... ah..." I leaned forward, getting
closer to the unconscious boy in the bed.  He seemed too frail to have
caused this whole disaster. "Billy!  Billy?"

"That won't work."

Startled, I looked up.  There, right beside Willow, was a duplicate of the
boy on the bed.  He looked sad, scared, and... slightly off -- as if he
wasn't really there.  It was Billy's astral body.  Either he had grown strong
enough to be seen by anyone, or Buffy's presence in the room made him
visible.  Something to think about <later>.  "Billy... uh, Billy, you
<have> to wake up."  I compared the two of them, and despite the awareness
in the eyes of the boy standing beside Willow, the boy in the bed was the
more <real> of the two.

"No!  I told her... I have to hide."

"Why?  From what?"  <Tell> me, Billy.  Let me know how to break this spell
that's turning all our fears against us.

"From him...."  Buffy's voice echoed from the doorway.  She was looking out
down into the hall.

I turned around, and peered through the window.  There, shambling towards
us, was a huge monstrosity of a man with a deformed face, and a large club
extending past where his right hand should have been.

"Oh man... What do we do?"  Xander must have seen the monster as well.

"I think I know."  Buffy tore off her jacket, and moved into the hallway,
confronting the monster out of Billy's nightmares.  Confronting it for him,
and for all of us.

The room, and the sounds in the rest of the hospital receded, and I
focussed on what Buffy was saying.  Intent now on the inevitable fight that
would occur in the hallway.

"Scary... I'll tell you something though.  There are a <lot> scarier things
than you."  She stepped forward until I could see her better through the
window.  Her eyes were glowing now, and anger suffused her demonic looking
face.  "And I'm one of them."

She growled deeply and attacked him, knocking him to the floor.  I watched
them fight back and forth.  Whatever this monster was, he was taking on
both a vampire and a Slayer's strength.  It was pushing her back....

Buffy was thrown through the air, and landed at the end of Billy's bed,
jarring it slightly.  Shaking herself up, she was ready when the monster
attacked her again.  She grabbed its misshapen arm, broke it over her knee,
and then slammed him against the wall.  It slumped down -- beaten.

I was so proud of her.

"Is... is he dead?"  Billy's voice interrupted the silence, but I kept
still watching Buffy.  Trying to assess if she needed me or not.  A trial
she might be to her school teachers, but Buffy was inordinately quick
thinking in battle.  She had a connection with this Billy.  I only hoped
that she could use it.

"Come here, Billy."  Her voice was calm.

"But I... I don't..." Billy protested.

"You have to do the rest."

Billy's Astral body slowly walked over to Buffy and took her hand.  He
looked up trustingly into her face.

"What are they doing?"  Willow's voice broke the stillness that had
descended into the room.  I raised my hand to stop her talking, never
taking my eyes off the tableau in front of me.  Buffy knew what she was
doing, and I had a good idea as well.

"I get it."  Xander said.

I remembered him punching the insane clown in the High School and
acknowledged that yes, perhaps he did.  Right now, Billy had to do the
rest.

Buffy looked down into Billy's eyes.  "No more hiding."

He let go of her hand, and knelt down by the monster.  Grabbing the bottom
of its face, and pulled....

There was a strange ripping noise as if all of reality was being altered,
and a bright flash of light.  When my eyes cleared, I realized Xander and
Willow were wearing the clothes they had started the day with.

That meant... Buffy was still standing near the doorway, but... her face
was smooth, young, and human again.  She touched her skin, and... smiled.
My whole body, held stiff and tight for the past hour, released, and I
grinned. Things were back to normal, <Buffy> was back to normal, and we had
succeeded.

"Hey!  He's waking up."  Xander was standing by Billy's bedside.

I turned and, along with everyone else, gathered around the bed.  Billy's
eyes flickered a couple of times and then slowly opened.  He looked at us,
and his gaze finally settled on Buffy.  "I had the strangest dream."
Lifting up a weak arm, he pointed towards her.  "... and you were in it,"
he gestured towards me, "and you... Who <are> you people?

"Let's get a doctor."  More happy than I could remember being in a very
long time, I headed towards the door with Xander following behind me.

Just before we left the room, a man appeared.  He was wearing a sweatsuit
with a baseball cap, and a whistle on a string around his neck.  "Oh...
huh!  Billy's got company."

I smiled.  Normality intrudes.

The man removed his baseball cap, revealing balding black hair.  "I... I'm
his kiddy league coach.  I come by here every day, just hoping against hope
that he's... going to wake up soon."  He smiled.  "He's my 'Lucky 19'."

<Lucky 19>... Looking into the room, Buffy caught my gaze and held it.
Acknowledgement of the man's words passed between us.  This was the
man... the monster, who had caused Billy such misery, and started the whole
miserable chain of events.

"So... how is he?"

In answer to the coach's words, Buffy moved aside to reveal Billy lying on
the bed behind her.  "He's awake." Condemnation filled her voice.

"What?"  The coach, startled, moved inside the room.

Rapidly, I closed the distance behind him, my hand so very <casually>
reaching out  to hold to edge of the doorway -- and block him from leaving.
Xander  followed my move, and stayed right next to the door.

Buffy continued to fulfill the man's destiny.  Setting up his doom with
words instead of fists.  "You blamed him for losing the game.  So you
caught up with him afterwards, didn't you?"

"What are you talking about?"

Billy propped himself up on his left arm, and used the other to tear out
the unneeded air tube inserted into his nose.  "You said that it was my
fault that we lost."

Losing nerve, the coach made a break for it... and found Xander and I
waiting for him.  With the two of us, he didn't have a chance.  I enjoyed
playing a physical role at last against an opponent I could handle.  After
the confusing nightmares of this past day... I would <not> let him escape
from the consequences he had brought upon himself.

"It <wasn't> my fault!  There's eight other players on the team.  <You>
know that."  Billy, finished with destroying his own personal monster,
leaned back into the bed.

"Nice going."  Buffy said.

I shifted my grip on the man.  "Willow?  Why don't you go and get hospital
security?  I believe the police will want to talk with him."

(end of part 6/7)





[e-mail]
"I wouldn't be caught dead with a necrophiliac."







-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: LDS <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Unravelling the Depths (7/7)
Date: 03 Jun 1998 00:00:08

Last part! Hope you enjoyed it. :)


Title:     Unravelling the Depths (2/7)
Author:     Dawn Steele
e-mail:     [e-mail]
Summary:    Giles' POV in Nightmares (1st season spoilers)

Feedback:    Yes please. Good or bad. ;-)
Distribution:  SunS page
Disclaimers:  Not mine! Dialogue recognized is from Nightmares, and written
by someone else who did a good job and got paid for it.  Anything you don't
recognize is mine.

Random babbling explanation:  Written in response to the SunS Chaos POV
challenge (http://www.enteract.com/~perridox/SunS/). Previously published
in the "An Alternate Viewpoint" fanzine (see
http://members.tripod.com/~natmerc/avzine.html) which is currently out of
print, but will probably do a second run in September. Ok? <g>

Unravelling the Depths
By Dawn Steele ([e-mail])
Part 7/7

Buffy and I met in the library shortly after the last bell had rung.
She seemed... fine.  But then, she always bounced back remarkably
quickly.  I wondered if it was a trait that all Slayers shared, or if those
who didn't have it merely had very short careers.

"Hi Giles!  I'm off for court-regulated quality time for the weekend --
Sunnydale will have to survive without me."  She dropped her school books
on the counter, and hopped up to sit on the table where I was clearing away
the newspapers.  "What's the scoop on the teacher's lounge gossip?"

"Well..." I put all the Sunnydale Press newspapers into a pile for later
recycling.  "No one is really talking, but they all agreed that the
students were 'restless' and nothing was accomplished today.  They were
complaining about having to repeat everything tomorrow when I left them."

"Meaning they can't remember anything either.  The few people I've talked
to remember some weird daydreams, but not much else.  How come we do?"
Buffy was staring off into space, absently kicking her legs.

"I imagine it's... partially repressed events, and partially because we
actually <knew> what was going on, and were close to Billy."

"Yeah."  She was preoccupied.  Not really <here> even though she was
talking to me.

I wanted to ask her what had happened in the graveyard before we arrived,
but I didn't.  She would just give me part of the story, and pretend it
wasn't important, just as she tried to pretend most of the time that she
had a normal life.  It was a character trait that would get her into
trouble some day.  The time would come, and as a Slayer living on a
Hellmouth, the day <would> come when she wouldn't be able to handle
everything by herself.

If only... I could only hope that she would come and talk to me before she
started to break.

"Buffy?"

"Hm?  What?"

"I'd like to know if I've really met your father."  I remembered the man
who'd come into the library.  Large, cheerful, and... coming when Buffy had
not expected him.  The next time I had seen her, she was a vampire, and we
had more immediate concerns ahead of us.

Buffy turned towards me.  Her eyes were sad, but determined.  This was one
Slayer that mere nightmares couldn't break.  Bend perhaps, but not break.
"Nope -- but he'll be outside any minute, wanna meet him?"

"Some other time perhaps."  Perhaps -- and someday I might even understand
what Buffy was really thinking.  In the meantime, I would try to protect
her as much as I could.  That was my job... and right now what she really
needed was to be away from Sunnydale, and her so very dangerous life.

"Vampire activity has been moderately low since you killed Darla."  I
sighed, hoping nothing too important would happen while she was gone.
"Have a good weekend off."

"Yes!  I am released from my prison.  The almighty God of Plastic Credit
awaits me!"  Buffy jumped off the table, and headed towards the door.
There, she stopped and turned, smiling cheerfully.  "You have a good
weekend too.  Sleep tight... and don't let the bed bugs bite."

I didn't even want to <think> about bed bugs.

 THE END

[e-mail]
"I wouldn't be caught dead with a necrophiliac."







-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: [e-mail] (Ingrid E Stanton)
Subject: BUFFYFIC: "Reunion" (The real 23/?)
Date: 03 Jun 1998 17:20:01 EDT

DISCLAIMER: The characters? They ainÆt mine.
SUMMARY: Back to the pastà
FEEDBACK: I hate feedback. DonÆt send it. (Just
kidding. - Does anybody ever *not* want feedback?
REQUESTS FOR PARTS: Give æem here!
([e-mail])

NOTE: This is the REAL part 23. Accept no imitations.
<g>

WARNING, dears: Some violence ahead...

*********
"Reunion," by Ingrid
Part Twenty-three: "Culmination"
*********

Buffy flew. She didnÆt look around; she didnÆt look back.
She knew where she was going. Hysterical as sheÆd been,
she remembered every detail of the way as if it had been
yesterday. Even the rock music from the stereo of the car
was pounding in her ears.

Now she was back there, and everyone else faded away.

In the distance, she saw the smoke, the fire, and the
figures near it. They grew larger, and soon she could
recognize faces of flickering terror. Without processing
anything but the task at hand, she gripped the orb tighter
and leapt into the scene like it was a painting.

GilesÆ face was calm, and when he saw her with the orb,
he didnÆt seem to notice that she was ten years older and
merely grabbed the thing and continued to chant.

Until Spike tackled him and the orb hit the tree behind them.
She grimaced as the thing tapped against the tree, but it
remained intact.

"Giles!"

Spike was pummeling the watcher viciously; blindly. He
couldnÆt seem to see anything else but the red-hot anger
consuming him.

Buffy knocked him off Giles easily. He was unprepared for an
outside attack in his rage. She could  keep him at bay while
Giles finished the spell. She watched him get up and fetch
the orb again. He was chanting like heÆd never stopped, and
the orb began
to glow.

Just then she heard another scream from behind the tree and her
stomach oozed. Willow. Again.  She dropped Spike and rocketed
past him to see the body of a red-haired teenager enveloped in the
vampireÆs arms, struggling against him with every ounce of strength
she possessed.

But it wasnÆt enough. It would never be enough. And she could have
stopped it. She hit Angelus hard, and he fell backwards, dropping his
bloody dinner.

And she waited for Giles to finish. But he didnÆt. And instantly,
she knew. Behind the tree, Spike was ripping at Giles shoulder, and
Giles was grappling with him, trying to finish the words.

He choked out a few syllables. Buffy rushed at them. Then she felt
something pulling at her back. She turned around to meet AngelusÆ
amused expression, as he watched Spike pull the stake from his
sleeve and stab Giles in the shoulder.

"AwwàHe missed," Angel sneered in her ear. Buffy hit him in the
stomach and raced back towards Giles where spike was preparing for
another strike, but this one was aimed to kill.

"Uh, uh," Angel scolded from behind, returning to grab her by the
waist. She suddenly realized how powerless she was as time slowed
down, and she screamed in anticipation of the coming blow.

It never came. She saw a figure dart in between the two men and
SpikeÆs stake cut into flesh. But not Giles.

Willow.

"What are you doinÆ here?" he demanded savagely, barely able to
speak.

She didnÆt answer, instead looking at Giles briefly and yelling at him
to get up and finish.

He did. Moving jerkily, he reclaimed the sphere and finished
the spell, collapsing against the tree. In a split second, Buffy had
been released by a writhing Angel, and she ran over to Giles,
whoÆd collapsed against the tree, unconscious.

Things were becoming fainter before her eyes suddenly as she
felt his pulse. Alive. SheÆd done it. Then she looked behind her
just in time to catch a vision of Willow with a stake planted in
her chest. Dust.

There were two distinctive flashes of light, and then all the rest
was caught up in a glowing blur becoming fainter. Blackness
swam before her eyes and she gave into the dark, shutting them,
and relaxing against the ground. If it was the ground. She felt
completely turned around now. Lost.

And suddenly something sweet touched her, something more real
than any dream. *He* touched her, pulled her to him, and she let him,
completely still and dead. Somehow, she knew he was crying.

Then all shimmered gold and white and she felt herself slip away.

***
END PART 23.

"God help me, if he doesnÆt stop, IÆll go out of my mind in a minute."

"Why DonÆt you? That would be something, anyway."
--John Osborne, "Look Back In Anger"

_____________________________________________________________________
You don't need to buy Internet access to use free Internet e-mail.
Get completely free e-mail from Juno at http://www.juno.com
Or call Juno at (800) 654-JUNO [654-5866]



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Discuss: Zine Inquiry
Date: 03 Jun 1998 19:47:59 EDT

Are there any Buffy zines that accept previously net-published material?



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Even The Nights Are Better 2/2
Date: 03 Jun 1998 22:57:50 EDT

TITLE: Even The Nights Are Better 2/2
AUTHOR: Alex Queirolo
E-MAIL: [e-mail]
WEB SITE: http://members.aol.com/treycash/ff3.html
DISTRIBUTION: Ask first, please.
FEEDBACK: Please..it's been awhile so I'd like to know..
CONTENT/RATING:PG. Some sexual situations but nothing graphic. The slightest
bit of angst but mostly this is just easy stuff.
SPOILER: Nope...not really.
SUMMARY: Sunnydale is being smashed by El Nino...two nights therein.
DEDICATION: To Erana for constantly stroking my ego. And to my Board buddies
who keep saying "That girl can write"...it helps when I'm not so sure.
DISCLAIMER: Not mine. Yada. Joss. Yada. Don't sue. Yada.

AUTHOR'S NOTE: This story takes place within the same time stream as END OF
THE INNOCENCE. In other words, since I have yet to put this up on my page,
Angel's been returned to teh side of teh good guys and he and Buffy have a
very strong relationship. Jenny never died so there is no angst betwen the
group.

STORY NOTE: The title comes of of the Air Supply Greatest HIts album, the
quotes are taken from CCRSarah McLachlan . Peace friends...and do tell me what
you think.


"Can you sleep Will?"

"No."

"Wonder why that is."

"Gee...hmm.."

"Maybe you're wondering...where is Buffy.."

"Or maybe where's a good hitman when you need him.."

"You know Angel could be feeding from her right now.."

"And I could have my hands around your throat and be strangling you."

"Will, I can't sleep!"

"Could that be because you won't stop talking."

"No..it's restlessness. I'm worried about her."

"Have you tried calling over there?"

"Heh he..um..no."

"Don't. If she is with Angel. She'll kill you. I'll kill you. I'll root as
Angel kills you. Goodnight."

"God...you're cranky when you can't sleep."

                                                   ***

He pulled the drapes across her window to keep the sunlight from streaming in.
Not only for his own good but for hers. She was curled inside a mountain of
blankets looking miserable and quite like she wished she were dead. He sat
next to her on the bed and reached down to touch her face. "You'll be okay."

"Go away." Buffy grumbled as she pulled a blanket over her eyes. He heard her
sneeze three times before muttering. "Kill me..just kill me now."

He laughed. "I'll make you some tea."

"I hate tea."

"And soup.."

"I hate soup."

"And since your mom is out of town and you're sick, I'll call Giles and you
can stay home today."

"I hate school."

He laughed. "You'll like my tea...I promise."

"Bite me." She muttered, sneezing again and then trying not to swallow. The
pain of her throat felt like sandpaper gnashing together.

He shook his head and then walked down the stairs to the kitchen. Just before
he got there, he heard a knock on the door. Sighing he yelled, "Who is it?"

"It's us." Willow's voice called back.

"Come in."

The door opened and Willow, Cordelia, Oz and Xander entered. Xander looked up
at him and smiled. "Where's Buffy?"

Angel narrowed his eyes. "I killed her and drank her blood."

Xanders' jaw dropped down. Willow laughed. "Um...where is Buffy?"

"She caught something last night...got in a fight with some vamps and got
pretty sick. She's upstairs in bed...and not loving it."

"That sounds like not a good thing," Oz said, taking an involuntary step
backwards.

"You have no idea," Angel laughed. Then he turned to Xander, "Go on up. She'll
be happy to see you."

Xander threw him a dirty look and then turned on his heels and grabbed
Cordelia's hand. He pulled her up the stairs and into Buffy's room. They'd
barely made it in before Mr. Gordo smacked him in the head. Hard.

"Ow!" Xander squealed, blocking a flying rabbit. "Hey." He plucked one of the
animals out of the air and threw it back, disarming her in the process. She
whimpered from underneath the blanket and reached for a stuff turtle but
Xander grabbed her arm before she could lift it. "Real princess when you're
sick, aren't ya?"

She poked her head out from under the blankets and stared at him with tired
blue eyes. She looked miserable almost to the point of it being comedic.
Pointing a finger at him, she growled in a hoarse voice,"Just keep it up
laughing boy...."

"You don't look good, Buff." Xander grinned.

"I'm gonna kill you. I'm gonna rip out your spleen and stuff it down your
throat and then I'm gonna tear off your ba..."

"Okay...don't need to finish that thought," Cordelia chirped brightly,
grabbing Xander by the hand. "We'll be downstairs." She pulled him after her,
laughing at his open-mouthed expression. Finally, as they reached the foot of
the stars, he turned to her.

"Ow?" Xander said in a very small voice. "I think I'm gonna be sterile for the
rest of my life." He made several pathetic moaning noises and then followed
her into the kitchen.

"Well Buffy's in a good mood," Cordelia said, leaning over Willow's shoulder.
"What are you guys doing?"

"Mixing her tea," Willow said with amusement. "Angel's using whiskey."

"You're gonna get her drunk?" Xander asked, finding his voice again.

Angel flashed him a look. "It's to help her throat. Lemon tea with honey and
whiskey in it. It'll knock her out too...she'll sleep right through any buzz
she gets."

Oz dipped his head. "Cool. That's good stuff."

                                               ***

And I wonder, still I wonder
Who'll stop the rain?

"They're expecting two more days of this," Xander groaned as he led the group
up the steps to Buffy's house.

"On the upside, the death count has been well..not." Willow said, looking at
Giles. After a beat, he nodded.

"Y..yes. Uh...there have been no reports of suspicious deaths since the storm
began." Giles confirmed as he pushed the door open and stepped in. He looked
about, expecting chaos and then breathed a sigh or relief when upon scanning
over to the living room, he saw Angel holding Buffy in his arms on the couch.
"How is she?"

Buffy looked up at him and smiled. Crazed. "G-Man..wuz up?"

"She's a little drunk." Angel said, pulling her head back against his chest.

"Drunk?" Xander said. "I thought she'd sleep right through the buzz?"

"Not buzzed..flying." Buffy said, nodding. Her expression was sincere but he
couldn't stop laughing.

"Well she would have except that I had to go out right after sunset for some
soup and when I came back, she'd knocked back the entire pot of prepared tea
I'd made for her...she's drunk.." Angel said, moving her hand as it pawed his
face.

Cordelia tipped her head and waved two fingers in front of Buffys' eyes. The
little Slayer pouted and then said, "Stop moving the room."

"Wonderful," Giles muttered. "Good thing her mother is out of town. This is
not something I'd want to explain. We just came by to check on her..."

"She's ok." Angel said, pulling her back to him. "Or at least she will be by
morning. I'm gonna give her some NyQuil if she doesn't knock out soon."

"But...more alcohol.." Willow started to protest.

"Uh guys...I don't think we're gonna have to worry. She's out," Oz said as he
looked at the Slayer. The others turned and saw that he was right. The Slayer
had in fact passed out against Angel's chest.

                                                  ***
It was well after midnight when she turned over in his arms and opened her
blue eyes. Immediately she wished she hadn't.

"Ugh."

"I don't think that's an actual dictionary word."

"Bite me."

"Only if you ask pretty please."

Buffy turned to him and squinted. "Do you really want to fit in ash tray?"

He laughed. "Shh.." Pulling her closer, he pressed his lips to hers. "I'm not
scared of you, Slayer."

She pushed him off and then fell back to the pillow. "Why is my head
spinning?"

"Um...that's what they call a hangover."

"I know hangovers. This is not a hangover. This sucks."

"It's a pretty big hangover."

"It can't be..I did't drink anything.." she whined as she buried her head in
his shoulder.

"That would be..I put whiskey in your tea. But you felt better, right?"

She looked up at him. "You got me drunk?"

"Technically." Angel said, moving her clenching hand away from his lower
regions.

"I have this hangover because of you?" she asked, her hand grabbing at his
stomache.

"Hey careful.." Angel said, grabbing her hand and dipping her back. He pressed
his mouth to hers, hoping to make her forget her homicidal urges. A moment
later he squealed in disbelief. "Buffy!"

"You got me drunk...you're not getting out of this so easy...I have the Main
Street Parade from Disneyland running through my head...you are gonna pay.."

He grinned, "That could be fun."

"Oh no.."

He shoved her back, knowing that if he couldn't distract her, he was really
gonna get it. Threading his hands up and under her shirt, he began to kiss her
passionately. He heard her whimper in protest and then her arms pulled him
tighter onto her. He grinned and moved his mouth to her shoulders She arched
back in his arms and persuaded him on with her moans. And then just as he did,
she kneed him in the groin and kicked him off the bed.

"Not tonight, lover. You get the floor."

Swallowing back the pain, he fell to the floor. "Right. Floor. Ow."

"Goodnight, Angel." Buffy chirped just before she sneezed four times straight.

                                                       ***

"Will, it's raining."

"You don't say."

"Yeah, I do. I think we're gonna have more thunder t'night."

"Yippy."

"Are you okay, Will? You sound kinda..well..half asleep."

"Imagine that."

"Hm..anyways...I can't believe Angel got Buffy drunk. What a shmuck.."

"Probably a sound asleep shmuck."

"No...Buffy's probably whooping his butt.."

"Well then at least he'd be unconsious."

"You're kinda cranky. You should get some sleep, Will."

"Really..I should get some sleep?"

"Yeah..it's three morning? What the hell are you doing up?"

"Oh I don't know? Planning your murder?"

"Aw shucks, Will, I'm touched.."

"Did I mention that I'm doing it in graphic detail?"

"I really think you need sleep. I'm gonna let you go..you should start taking
better care of yourself..all these late nights can't be good. Night."

                                                   ***

He watched her sleep. She was still so beautiful. Even caught in the middle of
a dream she didn't want to be having. He watched her closely, searching for a
sign that he should wake her before the dream became too intense.

As soon as she had passed out again, he had crawled back onto the bed and
pulled her under the covers with him. Now he held her as she whimpered. Her
breathing was labored from being stuffed up and she didn't look exactly
comfortable but he was reasonably certain that she was alright. He watched
over her shoulder as sheets of rain pounded down. Curling against her, he
whispered into her hair. "I love you."

"You're still in trouble, lover." She murmured, her eyes still shut. He
blinked and looked closer. A moment later, she flattened herself against him
as thunder crackled, "But that can wait."

"Yeah." He said, helping her into the sitting position. They moved over to the
window-sill. "Trust me, it's beautiful if you just watch. I promise you..I'm
not gonna leave you. I just wanna sit here and watch it with you."

She sighed and rolled her head back so that it was on his shouler. "Okay." A
moment later she murmured, "This is nice. Just you and me. No fighting."

"Even if you are sick?"

"I feel better. I should be reasonably okay by morning. But that's not what
I'm talking about. Just you and me. Right here. Not fighting demons or
fate...just being here."

"I know what you mean. Seems like we're always fighting or running or trying
to explain things. Sometimes it's nice to not have to."

"Sometimes?"

"Okay..always...but I think 'sometimes" is all we're gonna get."

"Yeah." Buffy said quietly, clutching onto his arms as thunder sounded. "I
don't...I don't even think I realize I do it.."

"I know. It's okay." Angel said, stroking her hair. "I understand. But you do
know you weren't to blame for his death, right?"

"I can say that but y'know.."

"Buffy, you both chose to go there. And he fought well. There were at least
six vampires on...you got overmatched."

She blinked. "How did you know that?"

He swallowed hard, his mouth twitching nervously. "Uh..heh..I guessed."

"You guessed..that there were exactly six vampires on me...how did you know
that?"

"Would you believe I dreamed it?" Angel asked weakly.

"No." She turned away from him. "First you get me drunk...giving me one mother
of a hangover and then I find out you were stalking me.."

"Not stalking..watching." Angel whispered, softly. He pressed his lips to her
cheek. "I fell in love with you from the moment I laid eyes upon you...the
night you found out that you were the Slayer...I saw you. I should have walked
away then...but I couldn't..I fell head over heels...but I never planned to ge
involved..never.."

She smiled. "I'm glad you did."

He kissed her again. "So am I." He closed his eyes and pulled her to him wher
she just laid, staring out the rainy night. And then suddenly she pushed away.

"Wait a minute..if you'd been watching me for months...then why when I met you
did you say you expected someone with bigger muscles?"

He laughed nervously and then stood up and walked back over to the bed.
Falling against it, he put his hands over his eyes and began to shake his
head.

                                                    ***

"Hey Will."

"Oh God, Buffy, not you too."

"You sound kinda tired. You okay?"

"Good question..shouldn't you be in bed."

"I am in bed."

"I don't wanna know. I don't wanna know. I don't wanna kn...wait...I do wanna
know. No I don't. I wanna sleep."

"What's stopping you?"

A moment later all she heard was maniacal laughing and then a click as the
line went dead. Buffy looked over at Angel who was dead to the world and then
back at the phone. "Well that was rude."

-Fin














-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Even The Nights Are Better 1/2
Date: 03 Jun 1998 22:58:07 EDT

TITLE: Even The Nights Are Better 1/2
AUTHOR: Alex Queirolo
E-MAIL: [e-mail]
WEB SITE: http://members.aol.com/treycash/ff3.html
DISTRIBUTION: Ask first, please.
FEEDBACK: Please..it's been awhile so I'd like to know..
CONTENT/RATING:PG. Some sexual situations but nothing graphic. The slightest
bit of angst but mostly this is just easy stuff.
SPOILER: Nope...not really.
SUMMARY: Sunnydale is being smashed by El Nino...two nights therein.
DEDICATION: To Erana for constantly stroking my ego. And to my Board buddies
who keep saying "That girl can write"...it helps when I'm not so sure.
DISCLAIMER: Not mine. Yada. Joss. Yada. Don't sue. Yada.

AUTHOR'S NOTE: This story takes place within the same time stream as END OF
THE INNOCENCE. In other words, since I have yet to put this up on my page,
Angel's been returned to teh side of teh good guys and he and Buffy have a
very strong relationship. Jenny never died so there is no angst betwen the
group.

STORY NOTE: The title comes of of the Air Supply Greatest HIts album, the
quotes are taken from CCRSarah McLachlan . Peace friends...and do tell me what
you think.

                                                     ***


"The winter here's cold, and bitter
It's chilled us to the bone
We haven't seen the sun for weeks"



It'd been raining for almost four days with each night getting progressively
worse. Every morning someone would mutter with increasing aggresion, "Damn El
Nino." All around campus, kids appeared wearing heavy sweatshirts and rain
coats. Even the flashiest of dressers were decked out in simplest of outfits.
The rain made looking suave hyper un-neccesary.

"This blows," Buffy Summers muttered as she jumped up onto the check-out
counter and began to leaf backwards through a magazine. She was dressed in her
overalls and a blue zip-up sweatshirt. Her blonde hair was pulled back into a
carefree ponytail. She pretty much acknowledged that her hair was going to get
ruined so it looked like she hadn't even bothered and yet in her own way, she
still looked good.

Rupert Giles looked up from the table and blinked,"Er, yes..blows?"

"Yep," she chirped, tossing the magazine and sighing loudly. "Do you know much
I hate the rain?"

"It's actually a rather beautiful occurence, Buffy." Giles said, straightening
up. He narrowed his eyes when he saw where she was. Then he sighed. For as
many times as he'd asked the kids not to sit there...well..even he accepted
that they weren't going to listen. Ever.

"Right. Beautiful. Giles, do you have any idea how long it takes me to do my
hair in the morning?" Buffy asked, a light tip to her tone. She glanced down
at her nails and then reached into the backpack next to her and pulled out a
silver file. When after a beat she realized that Giles hadn't replied, she
looked up. "That's right..awhile."

"But ya still look great," Xander Harris chirped as he and Willow Rosenberg
walked into the library, both looking a little sluggish and wet but otherwise
fine. Buffy nodded at him, a large smile on her face.

"Hello you two," Giles said softly.

"Hi," Willow grinned. Then she looked at Buffy. "So, since you're not gonna
slay t'night...I mean with the floods and all...we gonna go to the Bronze? I
mean..Oz is playing..."

Buffy smiled," Ya. Sounds like fun."

"And that wouldn't have anything to do with a certain dead guy who might show
up to play Smoochie Boy, now would it?" Xander quipped.

Buffy looked at him innocently, "Hmm..hadn't thought about that. You know
Angel could show. I should be there.." Then she looked at Giles. "With the
floods and all..."

He sighed dramatically. "Fine." He knew when it was a lost cause. Besides, it
was either let her party with her friends or let her play in the cemetary with
Angel anyways.

She squealed, "Yay."

                                                         ****

"Where's Buffy?" Angel asked, crossing over to the three Slayerettes who were
sitting at the groups' usual table by the bar. Xander was idly stirring a
drink and watching Cordelia dance with some jock. He didn't look too happy
about it.Angel vaguely recalled Buffy telling him something about Xander
making a bet that if Cordy danced with someone else, he could keep himself
from being jealous. Looked like he was losing. For her part, Willow seemed
oblivious. The small hacker was gazing up at the stage watching Oz with a
large smile on her face. When Angel appeared in front of the table, she
grinned at her best friends' lover.

"She should be here any minute," Willow replied.

"Unless she ran into trouble," Angel muttered, gazing over at the door to the
Bronze. He shook her head. "I'm gonna go.."

"Home?" Willow squeaked. "I mean..she's only ten minutes late?"

"No..I'm gonna go look for her...make sure she didn't run into trouble. A
normal vampire would stay in doors during a storm like this but Spike's boys
are kind of on the idiot side."

"There's a surprise. Idiot vampires."

Angel gave him a look. "I'll see you guys in a bit."

"Oh sure, right. That's what you say now..next thing we know you and Buffy
will sail off on a raft together.."

Angel threw him a dirty look and then turned and moved back through the crowd.
After a beat, Willow turned to Xander. "A raft?"

                                                ***


She moaned as the vampire straddled her small waist and pressed her harder
into the mud that was already coating her like a cloak. He reached back and
hit her across the face. Before he could do it again, she grabbed his wrist
and twisted it  until he screamed. Moving slightly, she kicked him off of her.
"Do you have any idea how long it's gonna take to get the stains out of this?
Or..or how I'm gonna explain them to my mom?"

"Try explaining the blood stains," a second vampire hissed as it lashed out
with it's fist and hit her across the face. "Oh right, you won't have
to..you'll be dead." He hit her again from the opposite side. She spun back a
few steps before regaining her balance.

"That hurt," she growled, reaching up to wipe away a stream of rain from her
eyes. It was coming down hard. Not good. Her boots were sunk down into the mud
and she was drenched all the way through. This sucked.

"Aw, too bad..wittle Slayer hurt?" The first vampire said as it attacked, a
large metal pole in its' hands. She ducked the blow and lashed out with her
foot, dropping him to his back. And then she slipped.

She felt herself falling and then a moment later she was lying in the mud
again, wincing at a pain in her side. She started to rise but was knocked back
by the pole hitting her mid-section. "Ow.." Reaching up, she caught the pole
just before it collided with her skull. She pushed back on it and shoved the
vampire away. Unfortunately as she tried to sit back up, the mud held her
tight. She groaned loudly as she saw the two vamps advancing on her, both
wearing large grins.

"Need help?" A voice called out. She looked up and smiled.

"It'd be nice."

Anything for you, my love." Angel said as he spun and kicked one vamp into the
other. Reaching down he pulled Buffy out of the mud.  He lifted an eyebrow.
"Wow, you're beautiful."

Pulling back, she decked the vampire who charged her. Then she pointed a stake
at Angel,"You want to be ash, lover?"

He winked at her. "Nah but these boys look like they do." Standing back to
back, they quickly took out the vamps. As he rubbed the dust off of his
clothing, he looked back up at her. "Are you okay?"

"Fine..well..kinda not fine..but fine."

"Right. You're soaked..we need to get you out of those clothes...before you
catch pneumonia that is."

"Uh huh. I bet."

                                                 ***

He was lying on her bed, staring out at the rain that pounded the cement when
she re-entered the room wearing an oversized tee-shirt and sweats. She wasted
no time in moving to lie next to him.

"You feeling better?" he asked softly as he stroked her hair.

"Ya..I'm a little sore and I'm gonna have one helluva bruise on my side but
I'm fine. Especially now." Moving herself up onto his chest, she kissed his
mouth. He returned it fully and then brought her head back to his chest. She
smiled and curled herself into his arms. "I'm glad you're here..it always gets
so..lonely..when mom's out of town."

He kissed her hair. "No problem. Now get some sleep."

"Okay," she whispered, wrapping her arms around him. Just before she dozed off
she whispered, "I love you."

                                                  ***

"Hello?"

"Hi, Will. Have you heard from Buffy yet?"

"Nope. She's probably with Angel."

"Oh my God..she's probably with Angel. We have to go save her immediately."

'"Go to bed, Xander."

                                           ***

Her eyes wrenched open in un-natural horror as the thunder cracked in the sky.
Whimpering, she fell off of the bed, pulling the blanket with her. She moved
quickly to the corner of her room and curled up in a ball.

"Buffy?" Angel said softly, gazing over at her. "Are you awake or dreaming?" A
flash of lightening illuminated the room and he saw that her blue eyes were in
fact open. "Buffy?" Standing up, he moved over to her and wrapped his arms
around her. "Are you alright?"

She looked up at him and offered up a nervous smile. "Ya..fine...I just like
sleeping in the corner better than..my bed."

He narrowed his eyes at her,"What? Buffy..you're not making any.." Before he
could even finish the sentence, the sky cracked with thunder once more and he
felt her wince sharply in his arms, involuntarily curling tightly against him.
"God, you're shaking.."

"I'm cold.." she murmured, face still pressed up against his shoulder. Sure
enough, he felt her shiver against him but he had a strong suspicion that it
was about more than just a case of temperature related chills.

"Buffy..are you scared of thunder?" Angel asked, not quite believing his own
words. It was insanity. She was the Slayer. Strong. Brave. Courageous. Scared
of thunder?

"Of course not. That's silly," she stammered. She watched from her position
held tightly against him as the room lit up again. "See...I'm fine."

"That was lightening." Angel said dryly, pushing her back so that he could see
her face. Placing a finger under her chin, he smiled. "It's okay if you're
scared. It's actually kinda cute.."

"I'm not sca.." She winced again as another clap sounded loudly in the
distance. Much more quietly she muttered, "I am not scared."

Laughing, he lifted her up into his arms and brought her back over to the bed.
He laid her down and then kissed her. "You are scared. It's okay." He laid
down next to her and whispered, "Don't worry, I'm here."

She sat up and pushed him off the bed. "I am not!"

He hit the ground with a thud. "Ow." He looked up at her. "Okay, you're not
scared."

                                                      ***

"Hi, Will."

"What now, Xander?"

"I can't sleep."

"Of course not, you're talking. To me. So I can't sleep either."

"You know Buffy's afraid of thunder."

"I know this. I wouldn't tell her that you know this unless you want to be
hurt."

"She's very sensitive about this, don't you think, Will?"

"Wouldn't you be? She's the Slayer...she's a warrior afraid of a noise. That's
okay, Angel is probably with her."

"Oh yay."

"Goodnight Xander."

                                                        ***


She gripped him to her, their lips pressed tightly together as their tongues
danced to the music the rain made as it hit the metal drainpipe on the side of
her house. She could feel his strong hands rubbing at the bare flesh of her
back, creating a point of fire against ice.

Finally he pulled away, acknowledging her need for oxygen. Still hovering
close he whispered, "You're scared." Before she could protest, he crushed his
lips to hers again and shoved her back against her pillows. After a beat she
pushed him away.

Grabbing a pillow she smacked him upside the head, "I..(smack) am (smack)
not!" He put his hands up to defend himself and then turned his wrist and
disarmed her. He grabbed her around the waist and  pulled her to his chest.

"I feel you shake everytime we hear thunder." He pressed his mouth against her
forehead and kissed her softly. Then he frowned. "You're kinda hot."

"So you keep saying. All talk and no action, lover." She quipped. He threw her
a dirty look so she sighed dramatically. "This room is hot," she murmured,
shifting so that her head was against his chest. She nuzzled into the nook of
his arm.

"Buffy, it's freezing in here." Angel commented, placing the flat of his palm
against his forehead. "I think your little adventure t'night got you sick."

"That's not how it works," Buffy protested, another tremor working it's way
through her, this time seemingly involuntary, as thunder crackled in the sky.
"You go to bed and then wake up all stuffed up."

"You've already slept a little and you do have a fever." Angel said softly,
pulling her tighter. He ran a hand lightly across her cheek. She smiled up at
him.

"Is this your way of trying to get me to say I'm scared of thunder..cuz I'm
not.." Buffy said softly. He tilted her chin up so that he could see her face.
Sure enough it looked rather pale.

"You're sick." He reached down to the foot of the bed and grabbed her green
and black throw blanket. He pulled it tightly around her and then brought her
back to him. "So, why don't we talk for a little bit. Maybe it'll help you
sleep so you don't get quite so sick."

"Talk. Nice."

"Like...what's up with your thunder phobia.."

She reached back to smack him but her hand struck his chest with barely any
strength at all. He lifted an eyebrow and then moved his hand to her forehead.
"You really are heating..."

"I lost a friend to a vampire during a storm," Buffy interupted. She rubbed a
hand past her nose. "More than a friend."

He lifted an eyebrow, "A lover?"

"A boyfriend, yes...the first one I had that knew about me being the
Slayer...the only one besides you."

"Did you love him?"

"As much as I could at the time." She coughed and curled harder into him. "I
needed him...Pike. He understood...he wasn't a lover though. I mean we did
make out a couple...hey not so tight..."

"Sorry," he whispered sheepishly as he loosened his grip. He kissed the top of
her hair. "Go on."

"Wait..I'm thirsty..I'm gonna get some water." She pushed him away and tried
to stand but almost immediately lost her balance. "Or not."

Smiling he pushed her back down. "I'll get it."

                                             ***
"Will?"

"Ungh."

"That wasn't my name. Not tonight anyways."

"Die."

"I'd prefer not to. I'm sure it's painful."

"Xander Harris...go away."

"But Will, what about Buffy?"

"Hopefully she's asleep. Or out killing whoever's keeping her awake."

"Nah..she'll never stake him. Maybe we should help.."

"Goodnight Xander."

                                                   ***

She shook against him as the sky errupted into an angry roar. He looked down
at her, still not quite believing what he was seeing. After a moment, she
continued to speak, her voice now slightly hoarse.

"We were lying on the grass. I guess it was gonna be our last night. The
school board had decided that I was gonna..well..not go there anym..."

"Buffy?" Angel blinked and looked down at her. Then he laughed. She'd fallen
asleep mid-sentence. He dropped his hand to pull the blanket tighter around
her but was immediately stopped.

"He decided we should do something...make memories..."

Chewing his lip thoughtfully, he watched as her eyelids blinked shut again and
she dozed off. And then a moment later, they reopened and she was talking
again. "We were..doing stuff...it started to rain.." She looked up at him
through hazy eyes. "Have you ever made out in the rain? We should try it..it's
very erro.."

Leaning forward he pressed his lips to hers and kept his mouth there until she
dropped back against him. Then he smiled. "So it was raining.."

"Rain?"

"Yeah, lover...rain."

"No rain.." she grabbed him by the collar of his shirt and pulled him atop
her. "Kiss me."

He did so and then turned her back around so that her head was on his chest
again. "You are sick, Buffy..you need sleep...not rough-housing...you're
either gonna wake up with a hideous flu-bug or a monstrous cold..either
way...you're not gonna be fun to be around."

"You're gonna make me pout.."

He laughed, "You're cute when you pout.."

She opened her mouth in protest but never got out the words before another
crack of thunder sent her curling back into his arms. "He died, Angel..a storm
started and we got attacked and I couldn't save him...so much thunder..it
drowned out him crying out for me.."

He brushed a hand past her cheek. "You can't save everyone."

She looked up at him, infinite sadness in her eyes. "I haven't saved enough.
Pike wouldn't have died if he hadn't been out there with me."

"He knew who you were...he chose to be there." He held her tighter, rocking
her. "People die, Buffy.."

"Why?" she asked, her voice innocent and young. He glanced down at her and for
the briefest of moments, he forget who it was lying in his arms. Not that it
was Buffy..he could never forget that. That she was also the Slayer. Looking
small and fragile. Tired and youthful, he found it hard to believe that she'd
been through more hell than most armies.

"I don't know. I don't think any of us do."

"Is there a great beyond. I mean..heaven and hell?"

"I wish I knew.." Angel chuckled humourlessly. "And yet I dn't ever want to.
It won't be good for me."

"Hey...I'm sure they know it wasn't you."

"Shh...don't worry about me.."Angel soothed, pressing his lips against her hot
forehead.

"I remember when I died...all I saw was dark..nothing else..I was so
scared...when I heard...only I didn't hear..I felt it...that I wasn't ready to
go...I was happy...scared but happy.."

"Believe me, lover, so were we."



                                                      End part 1/2
TO BE CONTINUED....FEEDBACK APPRECIATED.....PLEASE????




-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC:"Hell" 3/?
Date: 04 Jun 1998 20:29:12 EDT

"Hell" 3/?
by Jaclyn Amy

TITLE: Hell
AUTHOR: Jaclyn [e-mail]
DISCLAIMER: I do not own any of the characters from Buffy the Vampire Sla=
yer.=0AThey belong to Joss Wheden, Mutant Enemy, 20th Century Fox, etc.
RATING: PG-13
WARNING: Some of the scenes have some gory violence. If you don=92t like =
that=0Asort of thing, don=92t read this.
SPOILERS: None.
SUMMARY: This takes place immediately after Becoming Parts 1 and 2. It=92=
s=0Apretty much my own episode after this. Enjoy!
DISTRIBUTION: Ask me first.
FEEDBACK: Please!
AUTHOR=92S NOTE: I have finals to study for, so these will probably come =
out=0Asparatically.
***

=09"Mrs. Summers?" Giles asked as he knocked on her door. He, Willow, Xan=
der,=0ACordelia, and Oz had come to Buffy=92s house to question her mothe=
r.
=09"Yes?" she said, opening the door.
=09"We, we believe that we might be able to find Buffy=92s whereabouts."
=09"Come in." The group went in and sat in the living room. "Where=92s Bu=
ffy?"
=09Willow said, "We=92re not exactly sure."
=09"Do you know," Giles asked, "who Buffy was very close to when she live=
d in=0ALos Angeles?"
=09"Well," Mrs. Summers started, "most of Buffy=92s friends stopped being=
 friendly=0Awith her before she left. There was this one guy though, Pike=
 I think his name=0Awas. He and Buffy were always together."
=09"Do you know his last name?" Cordelia asked.
=09"No, I don=92t recall. But I do remember he lived on Park Ave."
=09Giles said, "Thank you. We=92ll call you if we find Buffy."
=09"What do you mean you=92ll call me? I=92m finding her with you. I=92m =
not just=0Agoing to sit here and-"
=09He interupted, "I think it would be best if you wait here for Buffy ju=
st in=0Acase she comes back."
=09With that, everyone except Mrs. Summer=92s left.
***
=09"I=92m really surprised," said Willow as she walked.
=09"About what?" asked Xander.
=09"That Buffy sent him to Hell even after you told her I was doing the c=
urse."
=09"I, I didn=92t."
=09"What?" she asked, the color of her face turning a bright red.
=09"Will, I-"
=09"How could you do this to her-to him! Damnit, Xander, I know that you =
were=0Ajealous, but-"
=09"Let me explain-"
=09"I already know the story. You were so jealous that Angel was going to=
 get to=0Ahave her even after all he did that you wanted him to die. You =
didn=92t think=0Aabout anybody but yourself." Tears started dripping down=
 her eyes.
=09"That=92s not it at all."
=09"Then look me in the face and tell me that I=92m completely wrong." Al=
l he did=0Awas stand there looking down.
=09"I knew it. You should be real happy with yourself, Xander. You not on=
ly=0Aruined Buffy=92s life, but you killed Angel, too."
=09"Or did I?"
***
=09"It says here that in order to get Angel back, we must awaken Acathla,=
"=0AWillow read from the computer screen. "When the vortex opens, Angel w=
ill be=0Aspewed out. Because of this, the vortex will imediately close it=
self, and the=0Aworld won=92t be sucked into Hell."
=09"Good job, Willow," Giles said. "It=92ll be good to try when Buffy get=
s back."
=09"Giles, I think it would be good if I tried it when were gone?" asked =
Willow.=0A"That way Buffy will have Angel when she comes back."
=09"I=92ll do the ceremony since I didn=92t tell Buffy," Xander said.
=09Giles said sternly, "I want you to wait."
=09"But it might be the only way to get Buffy to come back," pointed out=
=0ACordelia.
=09"Fine," Giles spoke. "I=92ll go to L.A. to find Buffy while you perfor=
m the=0Aritual. Be careful."
=09"We will be."
=09As soon as Giles left, Drusilla and a group of vamps entered.
=09"Put them in the cage," she ordered, "except him." She walked over to =
Xander.=0A"Look at the poor dear, trembling and all." She rubbed her hand=
 against his=0Aneck and shoved his face down. Slowly, she lowered her fan=
gs and bit into his=0Aneck. She quickly pulled away as if his blood was n=
o good. "Bring him with us.=0AHe can be the bait."
***
End Part 3




-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: LadySun <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Charlotte Sometimes (part 29)
Date: 05 Jun 1998 01:04:04 -0700

Sorry I'm so late with this. These characters aren't talking *pout*
    Hope it's okay though.


Charlotte Sometimes (part 29)
    (I'm sure that there'll be violence from pretty much now on, so incase
I forget to say it in the beginning of one of these chapters you know
why :)


    "I'm not a witch" She screamed. Pleading with the men holding her.
Blood was ebbing it's way down her wrists and she knew they were
bleeding again, the ropes bore into her soft skin. "Please!" She cried,
but it was as though they didn't hear her. Or see her.
    They pushed her forward exciting a  pained gasp from her weakening
body. She couldn't make it to the town with her wounded ankle. She'd
pass out before a mile!

~

    He was watching from the shadows.
    Watching as they bound her wrists and hauled her off.
    Well, he thought, strolling along side them, gliding though the
darkness unseen.
    Yet another reasons that mortals were inferior. A witch? Drusilla? That
was the most absurd thing he'd seen in a while. She was far to pure to
be in 'leagues with the devil'.
    He laughed.
    But then, she was caught red handed at the murder scene...

*

    She looked up into the face of her judge. Cold, unfeeling.
She'd never been more scared in her life. Adrenaline from her mothers
death coursed through her veins still. She couldn't hardly think, the
image was flooding her head, causing unwilled tears to fall as a stream
might. The one man that could save her, that would listen to her looked
like a monster. An unfeeling, uncaring monster!
    She was a mess, blood clung to her! Tied around her! Ankle broken, and
wrists torn. She was tattered and torn again. And a small vision came to
her, of a sleeping Lydia, laying in her bed not knowing her mother was
gone forever, not understanding the pain of death. Unaware that her
sister was  being held at a witches court.

~

    He looked down at the miserable child. She had a good cover, looking so
distraught and angst ridden over her mothers death. But that's how they
all were. Witches. They all thought they could fool him. But he know.
She may look innocent but looks don't matter.
He got straight down to business
    "What evil spirit have you familiarity with?"

~

    Drusilla's eyes widened in horror. What? Evil? "None," She sobbed.
Evil? Her mothers murderer was evil. Her fathers murderer was evil.
She'd not done a thing. She WASN'T EVIL!
Drusilla looked into the eyes of her judge once more and pleaded with
her eyes. "I swear it!"

~

He made no reference to her sobs and wrote unknown words on a piece of
paper. Continuing as though she were a soulless villain.
"Have you made no contract with the devil?"

"No." She sighed, she was paling. Witches could do that on cue.

            "Why do you hurt your parents?"

~

    Her parents...
    Her mother. Isabelle was dead! Her parents had been TORTURED and they
sat here! They sat here judging her, there was a killer loose! A killer.
    A killer that had tortured her father.
    And then her mother...
    The tears fell softer now as her face became a mask of nothingness, her
breath stilling. She body stopped as an achieved horror stilled the
blood in her veins and ran it cold.
    He'd gone after her family! He was following after her family, he'd
chosen them!
    "Lydia" She whispered in shock as she realized her sister was alone in
a house with protection only from her uncle.
    Drusilla felt her body hit the cold floor before her world went into
blackness.



--

_-_ LadySun

SD - Http://home.earthlink.net/~kbleyle/SD/index.html

    Daylight licked me into shape, I must have been asleep for
days. And moving lips to breathe her name, I opened up my eyes
And found myself alone alone, Alone above a raging sea
That stole the only girl I loved, And drowned her deep inside
of me (The Cure)

_ - _Spikette _ Dru's Dolly - Mercenary_ - _
  _ - _ Head Dominatrix in the Evil _ - _
_ - _   Plan For World Domination, _ - _
  _ - _ With Chains and Stuff _ - _



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: [e-mail] (Charity C. T.)
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Chronicles (16/?)
Date: 05 Jun 1998 03:21:20 -0700

Name: The Chronicles of the White Knight #16 Uncommon Knowledge
Author: Taygeta
Address: [e-mail]
Feedback: Please!
Uses in anything: Sure, but tell me first.
Spoiler: Not really, might have mentioned a past episode.
Disclaimer: The Buffy characters portrayed in this story and any other
references to Buffy the Vampire Slayer are the property of its creater
Joss Whedon, and its owners Mutant Enemy productions, Kuzui Productions,
Sandollar Productions, and 20th Century Fox.
Rating: PG

**************************
Chronicles of the White Knight
#16 Uncommon Knowledge
By: Taygeta

    The locker door was slammed promptly and Buffy turned to see that
a smiling redhead was waiting behind her, "Hey, how did your date with Oz
go?  I'm assuming that's why you can be so peppy on a Monday morning?"

    "Oh, it was nice, we went Bronzing and he did the most cutest
thing," Willow responded with a sigh as her friend couldn't help but
crack a smile.

    "Umàlet me guess, he jumped on to the stage, whispered to the
guitarist, took the guitar and began to sing a song he wrote especially
for you called, "When I'm With You," she said as Willow looked at her
with widened eyes.  "  Before you begin to think that I have some sort of
strange immediate spider-sense that's linked to the slayage gene, I have
to tell you that I was Bronzing too."

    Willow opened her mouth to reply, but closed it quickly as she
frowned, "But what about - "

    "Xander!"  Buffy said as she saw her boyfriend walking past her.

    "Buff, Will, I walk past you and you actually call me back?"  He
said with a grin, "But no time to chat, I gotta hurry to class."

    The girls paused for a moment, before Buffy pulled his arm and
brought him back to their group, "Wait a minute, do we know you?  I mean,
Alexander LaVelle Harris, actually wants to go to classàearly?"

    "Look, I joined this creative writing class that meets once a
week during 2nd period, therefore I get to go there and not to 2nd
periodàwhere the Ogre dwells," he said with a smile not wanting to reveal
his real reasons, but he was met on disapproving teacher looks.

    "Xander!  That class is for those who really want to write!" she
said angrily, "You shouldn't just take it to get out of class."

    "So, I'll write, Will, just for you, but I won't be able to write
anything at all if I'm late," he said with a sigh, knowing that they
would never understand.  He gave Buffy a kiss on the cheek before waving
good-bye to both of them.

    Willow looked at her friend reproachfully when he left,
"Buffyàyou didn't tell him!"

    "YeahàI know," the blonde said with a sigh, "It's just that I
don't know how he's going to take it.  Y'know it isn't easy telling your
boyfriend you want to give your ex, who was formerly your vampire lover,
his soul back."

    "But you have to tell him your reasonsàI'm sure he'd understand,"
she replied, but as soon as she realized what she had said and who she
had been referring to, she faltered, "Umàmaybe not."

    "Precisely," Buffy said with a sigh as the bell rang loudly and
echoed through the halls.  She would rather do anything right now than
contemplate about what to tell Xander about her wants to initiate the
curseàeven if it meant going to class.

***************
End part 16.  Feedback?!  Please?!

_____________________________________________________________________
You don't need to buy Internet access to use free Internet e-mail.
Get completely free e-mail from Juno at http://www.juno.com
Or call Juno at (800) 654-JUNO [654-5866]



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "Jennifer M." <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Best Intentions Part 7
Date: 05 Jun 1998 11:35:13 PDT

TITLE: Best Intentions
AUTHOR: Jennifer M. ([e-mail])
SUMMARY: What would happen if Buffy's mom found her diary?
RATING: PG.
TIME PERIOD: Maybe past Becoming 1?
THANKYOUS:  Thanks Leslie S.!
FEEDBACK: Please!  Any constructive criticism would be greatly
appreciated.
DISTRIBUTION: Please ask.
DISCLAIMER: All characters are the property of Joss Whedon, et al.  The
idea is mine, though!

Best Intentions Part 7
~~~
Buffy felt herself falling asleep.  "Finallyà" she thought as
she drifted off.  She was immediately dreaming.  She was fighting
with Angel in the cemetery and kicking his butt!  'This feels
great,' she thought.

But as he kneeled on the ground, he reached up to her with his
left hand, pain in his eyes, "Please Buffy!  Don't do this to us!
I love youà"

She stopped, ready to attack with her stake unsheathed.  "What?"
Confusion raced through her mind.

"Buffy, please listen to me before you strike.  I only have a
couple of minutes before he comes back!"

"Angel?"

"Yes, it's me.  I have to tell you something.  It is very important.
Angelus is looking for you.  Tonight is the night he will come
for you.  Please Buffy, be careful.  Get yourself to safety.
Angelus is determined not to fail." Then he was gone.

Buffy found herself walking into the Bronze.  Willow, Xander and
Cordelia were there.  "Hey Buffy, raiding your mom's closet again?"
Cordy asked her.

"Hey!  It's the Buffster!  Good to see yaà where ya been?"  Xander
smiled at her.

"Buffy!"  Willow ran to her and crushed her with a big hug.
"We missed you!"  Then Willow collapsed into her arms.

"Willow?"

"You have to stop him Buffy!"  Willow told her desperately as
she turned to dust.

Buffy was in the cemetery againà "Willow?"  Giles was next to her.

What the Hell?

"Buffy!  Stop this!  You need to work on your form!  Now is not
the time for sleeping!"  Giles yelled at her, waking her from the
dream.  She was sweating and breathing heavily from the experience.

"Oh my God.  I have to get out of here!"  She strained at the
ties again.  Desperately, she began pulling at them, calling forth
every ounce of strength she possessed.

The door opened.  "Knock, knock, Buffy.  It's time to go," Angelus
walked into her room, and was smiling at her.



______________________________________________________
Get Your Private, Free Email at http://www.hotmail.com



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "Jennifer M." <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Content-Type: text/plain
Date: 05 Jun 1998 11:44:24 PDT

TITLE: Best Intentions
AUTHOR: Jennifer M. ([e-mail])
SUMMARY: What would happen if Buffy's mom found her diary?
RATING: PG.
TIME PERIOD: Maybe past Becoming 1?
THANKYOUS:  Thanks Leslie S.!
FEEDBACK: Please!  Any constructive criticism would be greatly
appreciated.
DISTRIBUTION: Please ask.
DISCLAIMER: All characters are the property of Joss Whedon, et al.  The
idea is mine, though!


Best Intentions Part 8
~~~
"Wait.  Wait!  What do you mean Angel is a Vampire?  This is
crazy!  Vampires are only in movies and Stephen King novels.
But if what you say is true, and Buffy is this Slayer, then why
would she be dating a Vampire?  This doesn't make any sense!"
Joyce looked frantically from the two teens to Giles.

"Mrs. Summers, please, it's dark.  Buffy may be in grave danger,
and we must get her to safety.  It is imperative we get to the hospital
and you have her released.  Now!"  Giles told her.

"Come on!"  Willow practically shrieked.  "Something's wrong.  I
can feel it.  Buffy's in trouble."

"No!  She needs help.  She doesn't need you three feeding her more
fantasy material.  Your story doesn't make any sense!" Joyce
shouted desperately.

"Mrs. Summers, if you do not go and release her, I will!"  Giles
told her.  "Please.  We must get over to the hospital."

"Mrs. Summers, the darkness lasts for a long time when you have
no way to defend yourself.  Buffy is in danger, and we need to get
to her before it is too late!"  Xander told her.  He grabbed Willow's
hand and led her out of the office.  "Come on!"

"OK, we'll go and check on her, but, I will not have her released.
Let's go.  I'll drive.  You're all worrying me."

The four left the library and ran outside towards Joyce's Jeep.

~~

"Angel!  What are you doing here?  Decide you need to come and pay
a little visit to the sick and feeble?" Buffy tried desperately to
keep the panic from her voice.

"Nah.  I heard you were here.  Thought I'd pay you a visit," he
smirked.  "You know, Buff, you're not lookin' so good!"

"Aw, Angel, as romantic as ever!  You always know just the right
thing to say to a girl."  'Now is definitely the time to start
causing a scene,' she thought.  "NO!  GET AWAY FROM ME!  LEAVE ME
ALONE!  GO!  LEAVE!"  Buffy started screaming, hoping a nurse would
come into the room to buy her some time.

"Buffy, I'm not near you.  Yet!"

"LEAVE!  GO!  NURSE!  HELP ME!  PLEASE!  SOMEONE HELP ME!"

Angel started looking around frantically, for something to gag her
with.  But the room was empty.  He started to pull his shirt out
of his pants to fashion a makeshift gag.

"Buffy! Stop!"  He ran to the door and looked out the window.  He
saw a nurse coming.  "If you don't stop, I'll kill her."

The nurse crashed into the room.  Angel hid behind the door.  "What
is going on in here?  Why are you yelling like that?"  Nurse Collins
scolded her.  Angel was behind the woman, positioned to attack.

"Oh my gosh, I'm so sorry.  I was having this horrible dream.  It
must be this place.  It is totally freaking me out."  Buffy told the
nurse.

"Oh.  Well, lets try to not scream like that, OK?  You're going to
wake up the other patients."

"I'm really, really sorry.  Listen, do you think you could let me
go to the bathroom?  Please, I really have to go, and I hate those
horrible bedpans!"

"I don't think so, honey.  You have to stay tied down.  I have my
orders.  I'll get the bedpan for you."

"No!  I mean, I *really* hate those things.  They're so degrading,
and, and icky.  Please?  I won't cause any trouble, I swear."  Buffy
gave her the best innocent look she had.  Wide eyes, pouty mouth.
She looked at Angelus, and a shiver of fear passed through her.
He was shaking his head at her.

"Look, honey, I don't think soà" Buffy could tell she was making
headway with the nurse.

"Oh, please?  I've been so good all day.  Hardly any fussà I won't
cause any trouble.  I swear!"  She had to get out of this fast as
Angel was ready to attack the woman.

"Wellà OK, I'll let you walk to the bathroom, but, if there is
any troubleà"

"Oh, thank you so much!"  The woman walked towards her, and began
to undo the restraints.  She had one undone and started to walk toward
the other side when Angel attacked.  "Look out!" Buffy warned.

The woman turned, to look at Angel.  Buffy reached over to undo
the other strap.  "What are you doing in here, young man.  No
visitors!"  That was all she said.  Angel reached over and punched
her.  She fell to the ground, unconscious.

"I told you to behave yourself!"  Angel raced towards the bed,
just as she undid the second tie.  She reached up and hit him.

"Get away from me!"  She yelled at him.


______________________________________________________
Get Your Private, Free Email at http://www.hotmail.com



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "Sapphire" <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Betas for an Willow/Angel fanfic needed!
Date: 05 Jun 1998 22:49:26 PDT

Anyone interested in being a beta reader for Willow first
person fanfic?  It will have some adult parts that I am marking
seperately...

Sapphire:  [e-mail]
DC Mailing list; http://www.busprod.com/aclaybor
Keeper of Willow's momentary obsession with sore thumbs,
Willow's whimper of sadness for her dead fish and her fake frog fit in =
KBD
Keeper of Dawson's awe of the 'new' Joey and the song 'On My Own' that =
Joey
sang to Dawson during the pageant.




-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Sorrowful Regrets (2/?)
Date: 05 Jun 1998 23:58:24 EDT

Title: Sorrowful Regrets (2/?)
Author: Michelle
Email Addy: [e-mail]
Rating: PG (buffy-like language and violence)
Warning: Just to be safe. Anyone who's seriously against the
concept that Angel made Spike might not want to read this story.
Spoiler: Oh, just Everything.
Feedback: First there is PBSD (Post Becoming Stress Disorder),
now I'm suffering from LOFD (lack of feedback disorder). Please
help?
Disclaimer: Buffy and the gang belong to Joss Whedon, Mutant
Enemy, Sandollar, 20th Century, the WB, etc. The Story and the
characters not part of the regular cast are mine!
Sumary: A look into Spike's past from re-birth as a vampire and
his future with Drusilla after Becoming.
OTHER STORIES: You can check it out as well as all my other
stories at: http://members.aol.com/aglx/fanfic.html < --- Changed
Address.
DEDICATIONS: Thanks to everyone who wrote back to me on
'Master' details.

***************

Spike snapped out of his daze as the body on his lap began to stir,
and he looked down at her. She rolled over onto her back until
her eyes connected with his.

"Spike?" she asked, her voice weak and innocent.  By contrast, her
deep brown eyes looked up at him with demonic curiosity.

"I'm here, baby."

The palm of her hand connected sharply with his face. She quickly
rose to look down on him.  Her fingers danced in the air as her
mind traveled through thoughts of the pain and sorrow.

"Dru! I don't want to start this with you again. I had my reasons for
what I did."  After all the time he had spent trying to prepare an
apology, he couldn't get the right words to come out.  Dru was too
difficult to please and he knew she wouldn't forgive him until she was
ready.

"You hurt Angel. You lied to me!"

"He deserved it! Princess, I'm sorry I lied to you, but I didn't have a
choice. Angel needed to be taught a lesson."

Dru dropped her head and began to pout.  Before Spike could reach
his feet and catch her, she was out the door and running away as
fast as she could.

~ ~ ~

Darkness. He was surrounded by nothing but a pitch-black darkness.
His eyes were open, but nothing could be seen.  Pain dragged him
into an epitome of nothingness. His chest ached with every breath he
tried to force in. It didn't seem necessary though. Even breathing
seemed a waste of time.


'Am I dead?' The thought raced through his mind repeatedly as he
contemplated where he was; what he was doing curled up on the
floor of what felt like a small cold room.

A point of light suddenly shone into the room, accompanied by the
creaking of rusty hinges.  It's starting point was unknown but the
intense pain made it impossible to focus on anything.   The room
slowly lit up, revealing black painted brick walls and a concrete floor.
The door, made of a hard steel was only a few feet from his face.

"How are we feeling?" Angelus asked as he entered. His shadowy
figure was outlined by a bright light behind him. The man on the floor
raised a hand to shield his eyes, and tried to look up at the monstrous
creature that stood by his head but he couldn't force his muscles into
action.

"I feel..." he croaked, stopping as his head began pounding like it
was going to explode.  His eyes rolled back into his head as he tried
to remain conscious. He opened his mouth to speak but couldn't
get anything out; the pain was too intense.

<This damn room won't stop spinning!> he thought to himself. He
reached up and cradled his head; trying stop the pounding. As his
hands brushed against his face, he felt the strange texture that had
replaced his previously smooth complexion.

"I never did catch your name." Angelus said with a grin on his face.
He stepped over and pulled the prone figure into a sitting position,
propped him up against the wall.  "There you go, how's that?"
Angelus asked as he lightly slapped the man's face.

He gritted his teeth.  "Why should I tell you who I am?" The man
asked harshly.

"Cause I'm your new best friend," Angelus said cockily.  He leaned
up against the wall and watched the man struggle against the pain.

"Huh?"

"Don't worry. You'll understand soon enough. Now, what was your
name again?" Angelus knelt down by the man's weak body.

"Go to hell!"

"Where did you think I was from, Heaven? Don't let the name fool
you, my friend."  Angelus reached out to a large cut on the man's
head but his hand was pushed away.

"What do you want?"  He was hungry. Craving for something but he
was too weak to focus on what it was.  The pain kept growing
stronger, each passing second making it worse.

"Right now, just your name." The man stared blankly into Angelus's
eyes, refusing to answer.  "Look, buddy, I can make this as easy
or as painful as you'd like." Angelus smiled as the man cringed.
The agony riveting through his body was growing more intense by
the second.  "That pain you feel?  It gets worse. And I'm the only one
who can make it stop."

"William," the man mumbled under his breath as a wave of pain
lashed against his stomach.

"Huh?"

"My name. William!"

"Good, you're catching on to this simple little game of mine."
Angelus smirked, satisfied with his findings.

William screamed as the pain in his head pounded heavily,
sending shivers down his spine.

"Hungry?" Angelus waved his hand and a another man dragged in a
beautiful young girl. She was thrown to the ground in front of him,
and his instincts to took over. William grabbed her body, and snarled
painfully as he brought her neck to his lips.

Angelus watched with a smile, anticipating his next move. "Go on," he
said, resting a hand beneath his chin.

He paused a second to look up at the vampire before gently biting into
the young girl's neck.  The girl whimpered but William was hungry and
finished her quickly.  He tossed her body to the ground and moved to
stand up.

"Now how do you feel?" Angelus asked from the doorway.

"Better." The young vampire wiped blood away from his lips with
the back of his hand and licked it off. Every drop of that sweet red
substance gave him more strength.

"William."  Angelus laughed, watching him make a mess.  "William
the bloody."

"Huh?"

"You'll see soon enough. Now, let's go."

"Where are we going?"

"That pain that still sits in the pit of your stomach. You want
it to go away, don't you?" Angelus chucked a bit at the sight
that stood before him; he was a bloody mess.

William rose to his feet and followed Angelus out of the room.

~ ~ ~

"Dammit Dru!" Spike raced down the stairs after her.  He had to
have her back, even if it meant groveling at her feet for decades.
The doors to the building slammed behind him as he ran out into the
pouring rain.

Her perfect figure could be seen for miles as she stood at the top of
a hill, head thrown back, her mouth wide open. Sharp drops
of rain poured down her throat. The rain mixed with the tears
falling from her eyes.

Spike just watched her. Unable to move or speak. Her beauty was
breathtaking.  Her dress was now soaking wet and clung to her body.

"I'm so sorry baby. I don't care what it takes. I just want you
back," Spike whispered to himself.  Suddenly, Dru froze, sensing
his presence.  She spun around and a smile formed on her lips.

~ ~ ~ ~

End Part 2 - What did ya think?



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: [e-mail] (Ingrid E Stanton)
Subject: BUFFYFIC: "Reunion" (24/?)
Date: 06 Jun 1998 13:53:45 EDT

DISCLAIMER: The characters are *not* mine.
Enough said.
SUMMARY: This takes place at the same time
as part 23 did, except for the last section. Hmm..
how can I explain this simply? Ah:

Section 1: What happens to Angel while Buffy
takes care of Spike and Angelus (part 23)
Section 2: What happens to Cordelia at the same
time
Section 4: What happens to Corin, Xander and
Giles.
Section 5: What happens to the Xander of the past
after the struggle scene at the tree.

(Let me know if this doesnÆt make sense.)

FEEDBACK: Send it.
REQUESTS FOR PARTS: IÆll be happy to send
you what ever you donÆt have, now that I have all
my parts back! ([e-mail])

NOTE: After those pathetic writing SAT IIÆs, I decided
to do something that it takes half a brain to writeà


*********
"Reunion," by Ingrid
Part Twenty-four: "Loose Ends"
*********

Angel was running behind her. He was close to catching up
when he felt a tearing in his ankle and slipped. He hit the
ground. Why he hadnÆt seen whatever it was?

The pavement sparkled in the rich purples and whites that
cement seemed to always get in the twilight, when everyone
had abandoned the commercial district of the town. The
points of light
were strangely hypnotizing, and he had to tear his eyes away
to remember what was going on; how important this was.

He stood up. There wasnÆt any pain. He was surprised. But
the pavement was sparkling still more, and when he raised
his head to look around, it was all gone, and the glittering
whites and purples became golden, swallowing the scene. He
was floating, not standing. ThatÆs why his ankle didnÆt hurt.

It was like the sunlight, this dazzling light surrounding him,
and he was tired. There was something to be done, his mind
insisted, but his bodyÆs urge was stronger. He closed his eyes
and slept in the warmth.

***

Cordelia was pretty far behind. She didnÆt think sheÆd even get
there in time at all. She shouldnÆt have hesitated. Damn, she had
to catch up. She couldnÆt even see Buffy ahead. She must have
turned around one of those corners, Cordelia concluded, and
proceeded to round the old building, looking for the slayer.

For a second, she thought she saw her. There was a distinct
something for a flash, and then it was gone.

The buildings were so tall. She felt like she was running a maze,
and somebody far away was laughing at her. She turned another
corner. This shouldnÆt be so hard! The town wasnÆt all that large,
and sheÆd been here many times as a teenager before she left, but
as she ran, things only got more and more unfamiliar. She was
lost. Dammit!

She shrieked as she ran into a wall and looked up. It stretched
endlessly into the sky. It was laughing. It was the *building itself*
that had been laughing.

And now it was spinning. The whole world was spinning.

She screamed.

The warm light and sleep finally stopped the noise.

***

Xander and Corin were stood by the sidewalk while
the EMTÆs were loading young Buffy into an ambulance.
Anyone whoÆd heard  her whining fit would have thought
she was dying. Her foot would be fine, they said, and
Xander and Corin had slipped away cautiously in the
midst of the confusion.

That was when Giles came running up to them from the
other way.

"Xander!" He grabbed the manÆs shoulder and came to a
stop. "Xander, have you seen Willow? What happened?
I entered the portal with her, and ended up in the middle of
no where. I couldnÆt find her anywhere!"

"I havenÆt seen her," he answered nervously. They each
knew what was on the otherÆs mind. Betrayal. They
loved her. But they couldnÆt trust her completely. SheÆd
helped them. Or had she? This whole thing could have
been some sort of a setup, and theyÆd never know.

Instantaneously, as if someone had unplugged a television,
there was darkness. Silence. He couldnÆt speak to answer, and
his reaching hands met only nothingness. Then came the
gentle yellow light, and all thought fled.

***

XanderÆs momÆs car squealed into a the Sunnydale Park. Ending
up barely missing a tree. He threw open the door and took off,
not really caring what happened to the car, although his mom
would kill him if she ever found out. She wasnÆt the only one
He was late, and Willow was going to strangle him. It wasnÆt
that he wasnÆt anxious as hell to do the curse with her or anyt-

He rounded the tree.

Willow was lying on the ground, two distinct puncture wounds
on her neck oozing blood. Her face was red where sheÆd
obviously been punched a few times.

He didnÆt have to approach her to realize she was dead.

He was late.

Angelus had killed her.

The whole park was empty, and the sky had become
horrendously black. Wind was whistling far away. He dropped
to his knees.

Something cracked in the sky, and before he knew it, he
was being pelted with the rain. He didnÆt know whether
the roar in his ears was the lightning or his own scream.

He got up and ran.

***
END, 24.
I got my research paper back! "A" for content, "A" for
mechanics, and an "A-" for format (I committed the
grievous sin of numbering my first outline pg!)

_____________________________________________________________________
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-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "Andrea Newbery" <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Repercussions (9/?) by Andrea
Date: 06 Jun 1998 20:38:38 PDT

Disclaimer: None of these characters are mine. They are all the property
of Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, etc.
Feedback: Please.

Thanks to Rachel and Christine for taking the time to help me with this.
I really appreciate it. :)

Chapter nine.

Buffy's house
August 21,1998
4:00 p.m.

Buffy sat on the verandah trying to collect the courage to go inside.
She had been sitting there for over an hour, ever since Giles had
dropped her off. They had all wanted to come in with her, to support
her, but she had refused. She had to face her mother on her own. Face
yet another person whose life had been destroyed by her. Swallowing, she
leaned back on the bench, letting the late afternoon sun warm her. She
could feel her mother inside anxiously waiting, knew Willow had called
her, told her they were on the way, but she couldn't make herself move.
Once her home had been a haven from who she was, her mother lectures
about being more responsible, to study more, to take things seriously
giving her moments in which to believe she was a normal teenager. She
watched the people walking on the road, children playing on bikes,
Mothers pushing strollers. It all fit so perfectly in this neighborhood,
the only thing that didn't fit was her.

Her eyes wandered over the front lawn, noticing it hadn't been mowed in
weeks, and her mother's jeep was filthy. She looked around, suddenly
noticing the rundown look of the entire house, the plants dying, the
paint chipped. Feeling her stomach clench as a slight sweat broke out on
her brow. Her mother never let stuff like this happen, well at least not
before she found out her daughter killed vampires. And then her daughter
had run away, unable to give her any peace of mind. Her head swam as new
guilt was added on. She had pictured her mother living just as they
always had, not worrying, just being. Shaking her head at her folly she
stood up, realizing it was time to face her.

Taking a deep breath she put her hand on the doorknob. Turning it slowly
she told herself to be calm, this wasn't a big deal. The thought tumbled
around in her head for a moment until she looked at it and realized its
truth. Nothing was very important in the face of her duty. In her life,
for the rest of her life, everything else would come second. She had run
from this truth, railed against it, even betrayed it. Now she would
accept it. She could take the horror she felt at what had become of her
life, at the things she had done and hone it into a weapon against evil.

Pulling open the door, she ignored the rolling of her stomach. She
stepped into the cool comfort of her home. Looking around, she felt a
strange sense of surprise. Everything looked exactly as it had...before.
Somehow, she thought the changes in her would be reflected in the house.
That the walls would be painted black and the furniture broken, the
destruction she had brought to everyone around her mirrored in the
house, instead it was cool and quiet, everything bright, clean and in
its place. Letting the door fall shut behind her she walked towards the
living room. Her mother was sitting on the couch, cautiously watching
her. Buffy just stood there, rooted to the ground. Her head flashed with
images of the last night she had been in this house.  Of the words
between her and her mother. Remembering that the last time she had
touched her mother had been to push her. She swallowed, her eyes begging
her mother to forgive her.

"Buffy" Her mother spoke cautiously, her face tense, "Willow called.
H-How are you?"

"Fine." She could speak these words, pretend everything was normal, like
she was returning from her father's, just another summer with him in LA.
"I'm...I'm sorry. I didn't want to make you worry. I sh..should have
called."

Her mother stood, walked towards her. Buffy found herself stepping back,
keeping the distance between them, unable to stop herself. Watching her
mother's face fall she closed her eyes. Trying to stay on top of the
mound of guilt in her mind she spoke, "I'm....you talked to Willow?"

Her mother frowned, took a step away from her, "Yes. Buffy, I'm so
sorry. They told me. I don't understand it. I believe you but I don't
understand it."

Buffy smiled bitterly at her, understanding the confusion she felt, she
had felt it to, in the beginning, "Don't try. It just is. You have to
accept it. I have...finally."  She wandered further into the livingroom,
struggling to keep her movements casual. She could feel her mother's
questions, begging to be answered without her having to ask. Buffy
swallowed, turning to face her mother once more.

Her mother looked so bewildered as she looked at her daughter, her eyes
afraid, yet determined. "W-We should talk. I....Willow told me about
that boy,  your boyfriend,  Angel.  Do you want to talk?"

Buffy looked at her mother, her heart screaming yes, I want to. She
wanted to throw herself into her mother's arms like she was five again
and her mother could fix everything. When her words meant something and
a hug could put right what was wrong. Her eyes filled with tears and she
swallowed them back, understanding that the time for them was past.
"No." Her voice coming out sharper than she had intended it to, lowering
her voice she continued, "Thanks."  She paused, trying to keep her voice
from shaking, "I...I, can I...I need to be alone. Do you mind? I'm
sorry, I just..."

She stood there praying her mother would let it go, not push it. She
wasn't sure she could tell the story again and keep hold of her sanity.
She watched her mother, seeing the myriad of emotions passing through
her face. Finally her mother smiled sadly at her, "I love you Buffy,
always."

Closing her eyes against the sudden rush of pain Buffy nodded, turning
quickly she headed for the stairs, for escape. Feeling both relieved and
disappointed with the reunion she began to climb the stairs. As her foot
landed on the second step her mother grabbed her arm, pulling her back
to her, wrapping her arms around her, holding her tightly. After a
moment Buffy returned the hug, holding on to her mother like a lifeline.
Speaking into her mother's shoulder, "I love you too." She broke the hug
and turned back to the stairs, nothing fixed or solved, but maybe just a
bit less painful.

Walking into her room she gasped for air, unprepared for the assault of
memories that hit her as she entered the room. Every inch of her room
was covered in memories of Angel.  Picturing him sleeping on her floor
before she had even known what he was, the first kiss by the window when
she found out. His cryptic guy visits through her window. The time she
had caught him holding Mr. Gordo. Sinking to the floor she sat there,
her eyes searching out every spot he had stood, remembering every word
he had spoken.  Seeing his leather jacket still hanging in her closet
she flinched. Remembering all the times she had worn it, the feel of the
leather against her arms, imagining it was him.  Shuddering she crawled
along the floor towards her bed. The tears falling unnoticed as she
realized that not only would Angel suffer the torments of hell she would
never see him again, never kiss him through her window, never sit with
him on her bed. She sat quietly, slowly rocking back and forth, the pain
still a huge void inside her. He was gone, she was responsible for it.
There was no way to ever make it up to him, to tell him she was sorry,
to tell him she still loved him. There were so many things that were now
gone forever. And not lost into the nostalgia of a past love but
condemned forever to live on, an open wound. Pulling herself up onto her
bed she sat, looking at the ring he had given her sitting in plan sight
on her dresser. Standing she walked over and picked it up, staring it at
for a long moment then slowly slipping it back onto its rightful place
on her finger. Straightening up, her face becoming determined once
again. He was gone forever, but her love wasnÆt and neither was her
duty.  Walking slowly she went to her closet, taking the leather jacket
off its hanger. She lay it on the bed as she quickly changed, letting
her tears dry on her face, refusing to let any more fall. Leaving
Angel's cross hanging around her neck where she had worn it since the
day she had sent him to hell. She slipped his jacket on and after
glancing at her closed bedroom door, she walked over to the window and
quietly slipped out.

She headed quickly away from her house, determined to head to the
library. Wanting  to talk with Giles about the vampire activity in the
area, and then head out on patrol. Her duty would not wait one night for
her to adjust to being here again. She walked quickly, purposefully
toward the library, not noticing when her path changed and she started
heading towards Angel's apartment. It started to mist slightly as she
walked, her head down she watched the drops landing on the pavement.
Feeling the wind pick up she pulled AngelÆs jacket tighter, her arms
crossed, holding it together. The town changed, houses giving way to
storefronts and run-down buildings. She slowed, then stopped, realizing
were she was heading, the route her feet had taken. Standing there,
planning on changing her path back to the library, but unable to take
the steps.  She stood frozen for a moment, the wind blowing through her
mist dampened hair, her heart aching for what had been lost. Things she
could never change, never take back. She tried to walk away, to ignore
the pain she knew waited for her in AngelÆs apartment. But she couldnÆt
walk away, his voice was in her head, telling her to come, telling her
not to worry. His voice telling her he loved her. Shuddering, she
swallowed, struggling with the memories.  Taking a deep breath she
decided she had to go, had to say good-bye to Angel in the place were
all his things were. To sit on his bed and remember only the good. To
come to terms with what she had done, and how she would go on.
Determined she began walking again, the rain another reminder of what
she had lost.


______________________________________________________
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-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "Aurelia Destiny" <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Cloaked in Darkness:  Chapter 7/?
Date: 08 Jun 1998 06:16:06 PDT

Hi everyone!  I thought I'd take this opportunity to shamlessly flaunt
my new Buffy page!  It's just new and I'm VERY short of stories, so if
anyone at all out there would like to have their Buffy fic up on my
page...give me the URL or send it to me!  All stories welcome, but
especially Buffy/Angel ones!

And for all those who want to read my Buffy story 'Claoked in Darkness',
I have up to Chapter 7 up on the site!

PS:  The gif at the begining page is a little slow, but it's worth it!

http://www.geocities.com/Hollywood/Studio/5443/BUFFY.htm

Love,
Aurelia

**********************************************************************

TITLE: Cloaked In Darkness
AUTHOR: Princess Destiny ([e-mail])
SUMMARY: Things are not exactly what they seem when Giles finds an
ancient diary, with news of the death of the Slayer.  A new girl comes
to Sunnydale and things start to go crazy, Angel is jealous because
Buffy has a boyfriend and the Anointed one gets a nasty surprise...
It is naturally a Buffy/Angel Romance story, cause I'm a hopeless
romantic!
RATING: PG.
TIME PERIOD: Hmm, well since we have only seen up till Prophesy Girl
here in AustraliaBut I HAVE read the scripts for the rest of
them...Okay, just after Prophesy Girl and we'll leave it at that!
THANK-YOUS:
FEEDBACK: PLEASE!  I love to hear from people!
DISTRIBUTION: Ask me first, I'll say yes anyway, but I want to know
where it is going.
DISCLAIMER: Buffy, Angel and the others are the property of Joss Whedon.
Gabriella and any others I add later on are Mine, Mine, Mine!  This is
my first try at a Buffy fic so don't be too harsh, comments and
suggestions or even praise for my lovely story are very welcome!


              ************************
                CLOAKED IN DARKNESS
                  ************************


                 Chapter 7: Unwanted Meeting


The vampire saw her also and threw Gabriella to the ground, she hit hard
and blackness covered her vision as the sounds of fighting reached her
ears.  Buffy shouted angrily and then someone was pulling Gabriella
roughly from off the ground.

"Okay, what were you doing with him?"  the blonde demanded as she ran
her eyes over the dark-haired girl and her eyes were full of suspicion.
Buffy suddenly grabbed a cross and thrust it into GabriellaÆs face, the
dark-haired girl was startled but didnÆt flinch as the cold metal touch
her face.

"I Uh, IÆm sorry, I thought you might be one of them"  the blonde
admitted sheepishly and Gabriella stared at her for a moment then
laughed.  Buffy looked surprised and then began to laugh also, it lasted
only a minute and then a look of jealousy crossed BuffyÆs face and she
turned away to get a hand on her emotionÆs.

"YouÆre AngelÆs friend, arenÆt you?"  Buffy asked as she turned back to
Gabriella and there was nothing but polite interest in the blondeÆs
gaze.  She flinched away slightly as Gabriella reached out to pull a
twig from her hair but the dark-haired girl didnÆt seem offended.

"Yes, I met him the same night I Ah, took your table"  Gabriella said
delicately as she began to walk back in the direction of æThe BronzeÆ.
Buffy followed after a moment, scanning the area for any more vampires,
she didnÆt tell the girl but that vampire had gotten away unscathed.
Buffy had had strange feelings al night, as if being watched and then
she had left with a sudden urge to hunt vampires.  She had come upon the
girl sitting next to a vampire and then he had grabbed her arms and
Buffy had sprung into action.

"I am Gabriella"  the girl said and Buffy looked at the girl who was
taller by a few inches, but god she walked so gracefully.  She was
beautiful too and Buffy felt envious of the long silky hair for a split
second, then it faded as she looked more closely at her companion.
Gabriella looked down at Buffy as they walked as if sensing the blondeÆs
curiosity and Buffy saw something flicker at the back of the deep green
eyes a moment before someone moved in the shadows ahead of them.

"Angel"  Gabriella said calmly and Buffy recognized him a moment later,
startled that Gabriella had instantly recognized the vampire even though
he still stood mostly in the darkness of the wall.

"Gabriella, I didnÆt think you had met Buffy"  Angel said in a
questioning tone and Buffy gritted her teeth, angered that Angel had not
even addressed her yet or even looked in her direction for that matter.

"Oh, I hadnÆt.  We...came across each other in the park"  Gabriella told
him and Buffy sensed that the girl was trying to cover up that Buffy had
fought a vampire.

"A vampire attacked her in the park, I tried to stake him but he got
away"  Buffy muttered, forgetting that she didnÆt want Gabriella to know
that her would-be-killer had escaped.  A soft gasp from the dark-haired
girl made Buffy regret her words and she twisted a stake in her hands
anxiously as Angel stepped out of the shadows and into the moonlight.

"He got away?"  he said almost incredulously and Buffy was suddenly very
angry, thrusting her face close to his so that he could see the fury in
her eyes.

"Yeah, he got away, what of it.  If youÆre going to accuse someone, why
donÆt you ask your girlfriend here why she was all cozy with the vamp!"
Buffy yelled at him, his eyes widened in surprise and then anger as he
pushed her away and turned to Gabriella, who was watching with an
unreadable expression.

"Did he hurt you?Æ  Angel demanded roughly, all concern for the girl and
Buffy drew in a gasp incredulously.  Angel had not even questioned the
girl about her talking to the vampire and worse, he hadnÆt denied that
Gabriella was his girlfriend.

"I am...fine Angel.  We were talking, he seemed so nice...so human and
then he suddenly went to attack me"  Gabriella said in a soft voice, her
long dark lashes lowered over her eyes so that neither Buffy nor Angel
could see what she was feeling.  Angel put a comforting arm around her
shoulders and she leaned into the warmth for a moment, then an
undefinable expression crossed her face and she stared at Angel
strangely.

"I...I have to go back to my hotel now, the sun will be up in a few
hours and I have things to plan"  she told them both hurriedly, glancing
around as if expecting to see something and Buffy looked around also.
Gabriella pulled away from Angel abruptly and walked away gracefully,
but noticeably fast.  Buffy and Angel watched her go and he had a
slightly bemused expression on his face when he turned to Buffy, herÆs
however was slightly malicious.

"That was rather abrupt of her Angel, think she realized out you were a
vampire, like the one that just attacked her?"  Buffy taunted, tossing a
stake from hand to hand, her eyes glittering mocking and Angel gave her
a look of disgust.

"I doubt it, she couldnÆt even tell the guy she was with was one,
besides sheÆs been around me a few times and would have known by
now...and you didnÆt know I was one until I kissed you"  he reminded
her, walking off and they were both surprised when she followed him,
walking quietly by his side as they headed in the direction Gabriella
had gone minutes before.

"Is she your...girlfriend?"  Buffy asked hesitantly and Angel met her
eyes, something undefinable in them, his mouth curled softly and for a
moment she thought she sensed love from him.  But then it was gone and
she was staring into eyes that met herÆs coolly, his hands thrust into
his leather jacket casually and he walked off without a word.

****************************************

"Master"  the shadows moved slightly and a vampire came into the
chamber, head bowed slightly.  The master watched as the vampire came
closer and then looked up, meeting yellow eyes.

"Gareth, we have not seen you for a month now, I was disappointed when
my followers could not find you"  the Master told Gareth almost gently
but Gareth had known the Master for a long time now and saw that the
ancient vampire was not at all pleased to have to look for him.

"IÆve had work to do Master, but I did not come here for..."  the master
interrupted, laying a hand on the head of a child that Gareth had
noticed sitting my the Master.  The child raised totally evil eyes and
Gareth found himself grinning back at the wicked smile that played
around the childÆs mouth.

"Of course you didnÆt Gareth...youÆre a busy vampire.  What brings you
back to my humble abode?"  the Master almost purred and Gareth felt
danger enter the room almost perceptively, the Master was toying with
him and probably had already alerted hidden vampires.  With a mere
twitch of a face-ridge, the master could have him executed and Gareth
swallowed convulsively.

"A girl, I want to bring her over"  he blurted and the master raised an
eyebrow almost incredulously.

"And you are telling me this...why?  It had better not be The Slayer..."
the Master inquired calmly and Gareth knew he would have been sweating
like a mortal if he had been one.

"No! I have found a way to get to both The Slayer and Angelus.  I was
out hunting when I came across this girl in the park, the Slayer rescued
her and I stayed around to watch"  Gareth looked around at the vampires
that had now moved into the room and he swallowed again nervously as
they grinned at him, but the Master waved them back.

"And?  What has this to do with Angelus?"  the Master demanded softly
and Gareth moved slightly closer, almost conspiritally.  The MasterÆs
face became delighted as Gareth talked, something unreadable in his
eyes.

"As I was saying, I followed them, it seems that the Slayer really
doesnÆt like this girl and she is also...AngelusÆ new girlfriend.  I
witnessed the Slayer and Angelus have a fight over the girl, I believe
if we bring her over we can use her against them both!"  Gareth said
excitedly, becoming vampire without realizing it and the Master gave him
a slightly fond expression.

"You always were a schemer Gareth, the best of my soldiers...Very well,
bring her to me.  If she is an enemy of the Slayer, it will be amusing
to face her off against this girl and as for Angelus...I can use her to
bring him back to us!" the master waved Gareth off negligently and the
vampire left hurriedly, hoping there was enough time before sunup.


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-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "Andrea Newbery" <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Repercussions, part 10
Date: 08 Jun 1998 08:28:24 PDT

Title: Repercussions part 10
Author: Andrea
e-mail: [e-mail]
Summary: Um...well it's after B2, so it's basically my attempt to make
everything all better. Well, after I make them suffer a bit more. :)
Disclaimers: The characters in this story are not mine. They are the
property of Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, WB, etc. I am not making any
money from this.
Feedback: Please. Good and bad.

Again, a huge thank you to Rachel and Christine for their help with
this. :)

Chapter ten

The street outside AngelÆs apartment.
August 21, 1998
5:30 p.m.

Xander held CordeliaÆs hand tightly as they slowly walked towards
AngelÆs apartment, trying to ignore the rolling of his stomach. He
wanted nothing more than to turn and walk the other way, but was
continuing forward, his jaw clenched. He attempted to loosen it, trying
to keep any sign of his nervousness hidden from Cordelia. She must have
noticed though because she squeezed his hand, silently telling him it
was okay to be afraid. He looked over at her, amazed at how far they had
come. Cordelia Chase walking with him in the rain. No complaints about
her hair being ruined or her clothes getting wet. Smiling at her he
pulled his hand from hers and draped his arm around her shoulders,
needing more contact with her. Everything was in slow motion to him now,
one building fading slowly into the next. His mind was remarkably clear
for someone about to head into hell, but he knew he was doing the right
thing. Even if his motives werenÆt all unselfish. He needed Willow and
Buffy to forgive him and if Angel was back they would be much more
likely to listen to his reasoning. His eyes clouded, thinking of
WillowÆs words, once again thankful he wouldnÆt see Buffy before he did
this for her.

Cordelia gasped softly, her steps slowing. He looked at her and then
followed the direction of her stare to see. To see a figure walking
slowly towards them. Her eyes focused downward, not aware of them yet.
Xander stopped, his fingers gripping into CordeliaÆs shoulders, unable
to move as Buffy slowly walked closer to them. Cordelia looked at him,
her face a mask of pity. He smiled at her, reassuring her that he could
handle this. Turning back to the figure, he looked right into BuffyÆs
shocked face. Watched as the shock turned to anger, as her body tensed.
She stopped walking, just stared at him, her eyes telling a tale of pain
and betrayal. He felt his heart pounding, the pulse in his neck jumping.
She walked slowly closer, the anger on her face hardening, becoming more
evident in her eyes. She came to a halt only a few feet away from him.
He looked at her, into her eyes for any sign of softness, any opening
for him to talk to her through. He could feel the tenseness of
CordeliaÆs body underneath his arm. Cordelia spoke first, her voice
nervous, ôBuffy.ö

Buffy swung her eyes to Cordelia, nodding coldly. She turned back to
Xander, her eyes lingering on his arm wrapped around CordeliaÆs
shoulder. He shifted, feeling his arm magnify under her gaze. He opened
his mouth to speak, but the sudden tightness in BuffyÆs mouth convinced
him not to. She smiled softly at him,  her hatred evident in the curve
of  her mouth, the hardness in her eyes. She spoke quietly, ôYou two
look happy.ö

Her voice burned him, acid thrown in his face. He pulled his arm from
Cordelia, understanding that his happiness was like a slap in the face
to Buffy. He waited for her to continue, all thoughts of hell gone from
his mind.

ôAre you?ö Her voice whipped through the air.  Her stance was
aggressive, he swallowed feeling the muscle in his jaw beginnning to
twitch, realizing she may not be in control of her actions. He didnÆt
answer her, understanding no words could get through to her now.

ôAre you!?ö Her voice loud now, she was leaning in close to him,
intimidating him with the strength of her anger.

He shook his head, trying to force the word out, ôNo.ö His heart
breaking from the hatred and pain in her voice.

She stepped back, her face calm again, speaking almost conversationally,
ôWhy not?ö Holding her hand up to keep him from answering she continued,
ôThe demon is dead. Angel is dead. Things are how you wanted them.ö

He looked at her, trying to calm the shaking of his body, he began to
speak, his voice sounding hollow to his ears, ôBuffy...I...I thought, I
w-wanted....ö

ôStop.ö  Her body was tense, ready to attack at any moment. Her voice
was cracking, losing the coherence it had begun with, ôDonÆt _you_  try
to explain. Try to make it okay.ö Her breath was coming in short gasps,
her fists clenched at her sides. Speaking slowly, her struggle for
control evident in every word. ôAngel is in hell. Things will never be
_okay_ again.ö She stopped, her whole body vibrating with anger.

He watched her,  tears forming in his eyes as he watched her control
slip. Wanting to explain himself, he spoke softly, ôBut... Angel...ö

ôNO!ö She sprung at him, knocking him to the ground. Standing over him
she spat out wildly, ôDonÆt you _ever_  speak his name. You have no
right.ö

He lay there, frightened of what she would do next, but determined to
let her do it. In the corner of his eye he could see CordeliaÆs
terrified face. He watched her open her mouth to speak.  Realizing  that
she was about to tell Buffy their plans. Shaking his head at her he
mouthed the word no. Staring at her until she nodded, accepting his
decision. He turned his eyes back to Buffy, afraid to try and get up.
Realizing she may not only verbally hurt him, but physically. His eyes
locked on hers and for one moment he saw beyond her blind rage into the
hurt that was hidden there. His stomach clenched, his tears overflowing
for her suffering.

Her face tightened once again, the rage hard for her to control, she
stepped backwards away from him. He remained on the ground, waiting for
the next nail to be placed in his coffin. Her lips curled as she
considered him, her voice venom, ô I trusted you. Even knowing how you
felt about Angel, I trusted you.ö Her voice was shaking, her eyes
burning into him, ô I thought of you as my friend. Someone I could
trust. Someone who trusted me.ö

Each time the word trust fell from her mouth Xander winced. The pain of
her hate searing him. She continued, ôYou knew how much I loved him.ö
Her voice breaking as she spoke. She swung her fingers together, copying
AngelÆs stance, ôYou knew how guilty I felt over what I did to him, that
I made him lose his soul.ö He could hear her anger rising in her voice
again, ôYou knew how hard it would be for me to kill him.ö She stopped
then, her eyes wandering away from him. She continued looking out into
the night for so long that he knew she was somewhere far away, lost in
memories. He stood quickly, shoulders slumped, knowing she would turn
back to him soon.

Finally looking at him, she spoke, her face a distortion of itself in
her rage, ôYou knew everything, and still you chose to betray me. You
forced me to betray Angel. You sentenced me to that. You turned us both
into betrayers.ö She paused, taking a breath, her eyes shooting hate at
him, ôYou decided that Xander knew best. Xander is the best judge of who
deserves life and who doesnÆt. Xander is the keeper of whatÆs right and
wrong in the world.ö Her voice was spinning out of control.

He stepped towards her, his mouth opening to speak. She glared at him,
daring him to answer her. His mind was screaming that it wasnÆt like
that. He had wanted to make it easier for her. He looked to Cordelia,
needing her support. She was standing there, her face shocked, the
unwilling witness to a massacre. Looking back to Buffy he waited for the
rest of her words, his soul aching for what he had done to her.  She
looked him up and down, her face coated in revulsion. Speaking slowly,
accentuating each word carefully. The poison dripping from each one, ôWe
are betrayers. You and I. We take the love and trust others give us and
we destroy it.ö Her voice getting louder as she spoke, ôWe destroy
everything we touch for our own selfish reasons.ö

He stood, feeling his life disintegrate as she spoke. She paused,
breathing deeply, he could see the struggle for control written on her
face. She calmed her emotions slowly, holding her anger in check. The
hatred still seeping from every pore on her face. Smiling softly she
whispered, ôItÆs done.ö His stomach dropped, fighting to keep himself
from collapsing, his eyes pleading with hers to forgive him. She took a
step as if to walk away and then stopped, staring at him for a long
minute. Then, her voice thick with disgust she spoke one last time,
ôNext time you decide to be judge and jury donÆt sign me up as your
executioner.ö

Xander stared at her in shock as she walked away. His eyes following her
as she disappeared back into the night. His mind telling him she
couldnÆt really believe he had set her up to kill Angel, but the memory
of the hatred in her eyes told him she did.  He was silent, hoping she
would come back, let him explain his actions. Cordelia reached out to
him, her hand resting on his arm. Looking at her, at the pity in her
face. She smiled sadly then spoke softly, ôShe doesnÆt mean  it Xander,
sheÆs just in such pain.ö He looked at her, wanting to believe her
words, but unable to.

He shook his head, the tears still running down his face, ôBut sheÆs
still right. IsnÆt she? I stole her choice.ö His shoulders were slumped,
his voice detached, ôMaybe Angel deserved to die, maybe he didnÆt. It
wasnÆt my choice to make for her. It was hers. And I took it.ö He
stopped, straightening his shoulders, his face determined, ôAnd IÆll
give it back to her. IÆll give him back to her, and then she can have
her own choice.ö
Cordelia didnÆt answer him, just squeezed his arm softly. Then she
slowly removed her hand, pointing to her watch and looking towards
AngelÆs apartment. He looked at her, realizing it was time for him to
make things right again. Taking her hand they slowly walked into the
building.
****

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-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: Jeanie the Tortoise-Fly <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: The Mission (3/?)
Date: 08 Jun 1998 10:44:25 -0700 (PDT)


TITLE: "The Mission" (3/?)...or..."A luckdragon?  What's that?"
AUTHOR: Jeanie the Tortoise-Fly
E-MAIL: <[e-mail]>
DISTRIBUTION: Anya and Windrider have my permission.  Anyone else ask
and ye shall receive.
SPOILERS: after "Killed By Death"...Isn't Ryan a cutie?
DISCLAIMER: None of the Buffy characters belong to me, they belong to
Joss Whedon and the WB etc.  No copyright infringement intended. Anya,
Robyn, TJ and Windrider are real people...they have given me
permission to include them in this fic.  They don't belong to anyone
except themselves...though Anya has on occasion claimed that the bank
owns a piece of her...My parents and my pets are real too but they
don't get a say in this.  Jeanie is me.  No one owns me as far as I
know so there's no copyright infringement there.  The characters and
concepts from "The Neverending Story" belong to Michael Ende, not me.
When I'm done, I promise that all of the characters will be returned
in one piece...even Windrider.
AUTHOR'S NOTE:  This is far form serious or typical of a buffyfic...If
I had to classify it I'd say it's humor/desperation.  Enjoy...or
don't...it's up to you.  Feedback is muchly appreciated, and I will
use any flame mail to warm up my room [the floor is 1ft underground,
and surrounded by cement, so it gets cold in here.]


The Mission (3/?)


    Jeanie, Willow, Robyn, and Xander finally calmed Ryan down and got
him home to his parents.  They then headed to the Library in search of
the Santa look-alike, Jeanie's dad.

*****
    Meanwhile, somewhere in Canada, [Ontario to be exact] Anya was
staring, fascinated, at the words which were scrolling across her
computer screen.  It was amazing.  The words appeared as things
happened.  Anya was quite shocked to suddenly see her name appearing
on the screen along with a description of what she was doing.  It was
very much like the book and movie "the Neverending Story" where
Bastian is reading a book and he finds that he is in it, and it is
occurring as he reads it.

    Anya thought about this too.  She found herself thinking about
Falkor, the friendly  pink-white luckdragon from the movie.  She
wished that she could ride Falkor to Sunnydale and help out her
friends in the search.  Suddenly she felt a slight stir in the air.
Just as suddenly everything was calm, until:

    "Ooooh I've got an itch."

    Anya gasped as she spun around, a hard thing to do gracefully in a
straight-backed wooden armchair, and found herself facing a large
pinky-white luckdragon.

    "Um...ah...ahem...who...what...ohh!"  Anya berated herself for being
so unusually inarticulate.  "Are you Falkor?"  She asked almost
certain of the answer.

    "Yes, child.  Could you please do me a favor?"

    "A favor?  I suppose so...what is it?"

    "Could you scratch behind my ear?  I can't...quite...reach..."

    Anya gladly complied, realizing that if she relieved Falkor's itch
He'd probably be more likely to help her.

    "Ohhhhhhh, a little to the right...up a little...ahhhhhhhhh.  There!
Ohhh that feels good."  Falkor's voice was rich and creamy and he was
obviously very happy to have that annoying little itch scratched.
"Ohhh thank-you.  Well little one, where is it that you want to go?
Don't look so surprised, you wished for me to appear so I did.  When
an Archive Goddess beckons, a luckdragon always comes."

    "I thought it was just the wearer of the amulet...or that you at
least had to be in Fantasia for that to work."  Anya looked slightly
confused, but that emotion was faint compared to the absolute joy she
felt that her Goddess powers were once again working in her favor.
"I'd like to go to Sunnydale to help Jeanie and the others find
Jeanie's dad."

    "Then climb onto my back and HOLD ON!"  Anya complied and as soon as
Falkor was sure she was secured, he took off.

    "Anya?  Your friend TJ wants to come help too, should we stop off and
get him on our way?"  Anya was a little surprised that Falkor knew so
much but she agreed and they flew West to Banff instead of South-West
to California.

*****
    Similarly, in Banff, Alberta [Canada], TJ the Dyslexic Ferret was
sitting in a swivel chair at his computer, hypnotized by the scrolling
words.  He noticed that a description of Anya's whereabouts appeared,
and after it, one of his own began to scroll across the screen.

    Like Anya, TJ began to think of "the Neverending Story," Bastian, and
Falkor.  When he read that Falkor was with Anya, he wished that Falkor
would also bring him along to Sunnydale.  Strangely enough, just then
he read that Falkor was already ahead of him and that Anya and Falkor
were on the way.

*****
    As all of this was happening, Windrider the Lurking Muskrat, was
going through the stressful process of correcting the grammar and
punctuation in his latest fic.  He was hoping to get it posted
sometime that week.  Windrider had been foolish enough to ask Jeanie
to betaread his story.  He hadn't anticipated that she would do such a
thorough job of it.  When Jeanie was finished, Windrider, who was
muttering all sorts of crude things about Tortoise-Fly's, literally
had hundreds of corrections to make.  Finally, when Windrider was
about halfway through his story he decided to quit temporarily.  After
all, there is only so much Constructive Criticism that a guy can take
before *he* needs some Prozac.  Once he exited his word processor
Windrider noticed that there were words scrolling across his computer
screen.  He had looked soon enough to see that TJ and Anya were
traveling to Sunnydale on the back of a luck dragon to help out some
friends in need.

    Now Windrider, like most people, had seen "The Never Ending Story"
and he remembered that luckdragon's were good creatures who were lucky
and shared that luck with others.  However, he also realized that
Falkor was already on the way to Sunnydale, and that Tennessee was
*way* out of the way.  So he began wishing that there were *two*
luckdragons.

    Well right about then he felt a gust of wind and got another idea.
he could ride the wind to Sunnydale...unfortunately the wind was
blowing in the wrong direction so He prepared to land in New york.
Lucky for Windrider, Balkar, Falkor's cousin happened to be in New
York at that same moment and when Windrider went flying past the
Statue of Liberty, Balkar flew underneath him and the Lurking Muskrat
landed on the luckdragon's back.

    Windrider was so surprised, it took him a moment to realize where he
was...it's not every day you find yourself flying on the back of a
large purple luckdragon.  [note: *dragon* not *dinosaur*  I would
*never* include that purple dinosaur in any fic unless he was being
pummeled to death by many, many, many Vampires and a slayer or two.]

    And so our friends were all on their way to Sunnydale California.
Actually they all landed in the school parking lot at the same time as
Jeanie, Robyn, Xander and Willow arrived there after taking Ryan back
to his frantic parents.  Unfortunately, as soon as the two luckdragons
said their good-byes and everyone else had said their hello's, two
very nasty looking Vampires chose this time to feast on some 'Happy
Meals on wheels.'

    Just as one of the vamps was about to take a nice long drink from
TJ's neck, he turned to dust.  A moment later the other vamp was
dusted as well, and in his place stood one very pretty, petite slayer.


*****
Okay so It's still not done but at least it's a start.  And yes I know
it's cheesy but this is fanfic and it's not serious, just silly and a
way for me to  think of something other than the events of
Becoming...which you will notice has not happened yet...nor will it
ever happen...in *this* fic.
Feedback Please!  I don't mind Constructive Criticism...even
destructive criticism might be better than no response at all. {grin}
~Jeanie







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-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "Jennifer M." <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Best Intentions Part 9
Date: 08 Jun 1998 13:26:32 PDT

TITLE: Best Intentions (9/12)
AUTHOR: Jennifer M. ([e-mail])
SUMMARY: What would happen if Buffy's mom found her diary?
RATING: PG.
TIME PERIOD: Maybe past Becoming 1?
THANKYOUS:  Thanks Leslie S.!
FEEDBACK: Please!  Any constructive criticism would be greatly
appreciated.
DISTRIBUTION: Please ask.
DISCLAIMER: All characters are the property of Joss Whedon, et al.  The
idea is mine, though!

Best Intentions Part 9

Joyce, Giles and the two teens raced into the hospital.

"We're here to check on my daughter.  I want to be sure she's ok,"
Joyce explained to the security guard.

"I'm sorry, Ma'am.  It is past visitor's hours.  I can't let you
in," the young man told her.

"Listen, someone may be in a lot of danger here, and we need to
make sure she is alright," Giles interjected.

"You're gonna have to come back in the morning.  There are no
more visitors tonight," the guard said again, firmly.

The four left the reception area.  "Hey!  What if we walked in
through the ER?  It's unlocked, right?  Maybe we could find the
way to the Psych ward through there?"  Willow asked.

"Good thinking, Willow.  Yes, let's try that," Giles said.  The
four raced towards the back of the hospital.  Fear urging them on.

~~~

Buffy was desperately trying to fight Angel off while still lying
in the bed.  She wasn't having much luck.  "Come on Angel,
make this a fair fight.  It's no fun if I'm tied up!"

Angelus just smiled at her.  "Now, you know that's not true,
Buffy,"  he goaded her as he hauled off and punched her in the
face.  She fell back onto the pillow, unconscious.  "It was a good
try, though."

He reached down towards her, when the door opened.  "Angel.
Back away from her. Now."  Angel turned around to see Giles,
Joyce, Xander and Willow in the door.  Both Giles and Xander were
holding crosses towards the Vampire, and Willow was holding a stake.
Joyce just looked on in shock.  Angel took a step back from the group.

"Aw, look who decided to show up to save the Slayer!"  He said
sarcastically.  "The Scooby Gang."

"Buffy?"  Joyce asked the unconscious girl.  "Buffy!"  She started
to move towards the bed.  Giles grabbed her arm and held her back.

Angel just watched them.  "What are you four going to do against
me?  I mean, your precious slayer is unconscious.  Her mom looks
like *she's* ready to be committed.  And, well, Giles, you know
you're no match for me."

"He may not be, but, the three of us will be a lot harder to
handle, Angel.  Especially if we start to make a little noise!"
Xander declared with a bravado he just did not feel.

"Make that four, Xander," Joyce grabbed the cross from the boy,
who then reached into his backpack to pull out a stake.  Joyce, still
unbelieving at what was happening right in front of her, held
the cross towards Angel.  He backed away a little more.

"You do realize that can't stop me.  I'm here to kill the slayer.
Didn't ya read your antique books today, Giles?  It is my job to
kill her.  Sorry, folks but the show is just about over.  Take
comfort in the fact that you have a front row seat."


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-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: dreamscape <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: BBETA: Long Day 1/1 by Dreamscape205
Date: 08 Jun 1998 11:28:06 -0400

TITLE:  Long Day 1/1
AUTHOR:  Dreamscape205
EMAIL:  [e-mail]
DISTRIBUTION:  Anya, I'll submit it directly through the Slayer's
Fanfic site.  Anyone else, it's okay as long as you give me credit,
and email me with the URL I can find it archived.
SUMMARY:  Oz found a note...and who does it belong to?
RATING:  PG-13, I guess because of a few cuss words
SPOILERS: Becoming
DISCLAIMER:  BtVS and its character's belong to Joss Whedon, the WB,
Fox, and Mutant Enemy.  The Song "Long Day" Was written by Rob Thomas
and performed by Matchbox 20.  No infringements intended!

Author's Note:  text enclosed in < > represent thoughts.  I was
listening to Matchbox 20's "yourself or someone like you" CD on the
way home and this just popped into my head.  Hope you enjoy it!

******************

"You guys have got to hear this.  Oz wrote the most amazing lyrics to
a note he found on the floor in the cafeteria.  Of course, he added a
little to it and changed the words a bit,"  Willow exclaimed
excitedly.

"Cool!"  Xander and Cordelia cried in unison.

Oz smiled at his beautiful girlfriend, "You would think Mary Had a
Little Lamb was amazing if I played it."

"Well, sure.  It is amazing," she said, grinning at Oz as he began to
play.

< What in the world?! > Giles thought to himself as he heard a loud
guitar begin to play.  He emerged from the stacks to see Willow,
Xander and Cordelia gathered around Oz, who had his guitar hooked to a
small amplifier that was sitting nearby on the floor.
He listened quietly as Oz continued the distinct rifts and melody
until Giles heard the words to the song.  Dumbfounded, he was
completely frozen in place.

"It's sitting by the overcoat
The second shelf
the note she wrote
That I can't bring myself to throw away
And also 'reach,' she said
for no one else but you
Cuz you won't turn away
When someone else is gone'

Oz looked up to see the three of them getting into the music.  This,
of course, gave him a happy and he continued to sing.

"I'm sorry 'bout the attitude
I need to give when I'm with you
But no one else would take this shit from me
And I'm so terrified of no one else but me
I'm here all the time
I won't go away
It's me, yeah
well I can't get myself to go away
Hey, It's me
and I can't get myself to go away
Oh God, I shouldn't feel this way"

Giles finally found the strength to move and began running down
the stairs towards the teenagers, but still Oz sang on.

(chorus)
now
Reach down your hand in your pocket
Pull out some hope for me
It's been a long day
always
ain't that right
And no Lord your hand won't stop it
Just keep you trembling
It's been a long day
always
ain't that right"

Giles finally reached his destination and grabbed the guitar from
Oz's grip.  "Just what the bloody hell do you think you're doing?"
Giles shouted at the young man.

"Geez, Giles, get a grip, why don't you?"  Xander said, grabbing Giles
by the arm.

"Yeah," Cordelia joined her boyfriend, "Giles, he's just playing a new
song he wrote."

"New song, my eye!  Those words...where did you get them?  They're
different, but they're the same!"  He continued to shout at Oz.

"Whoa, Man, chill.  They're just from some note I found in the caf.
There wasn't a name on it, so I couldn't find the person who wrote
it."  Oz tried to explain.

"Giles, what is it?  What's wrong?"  Willow asked calmly.  She'd never
seen Giles act this way, except when he attacked Xander when he
defended the attempt to restore Angel's soul.  Xander had unwisely
thrown Jenny's death in Giles' face and Giles exploded.  < Emotional
duress, that's what's causing this. >

Giles head bowed, "The note...I found it in my office.  It was
unsigned, but the handwriting was unmistakable.  Did you see the
note?" he asked Willow.  When she shook her head no, he continued, "It
was Buffy's."

Willow's eyes began to tear, as it gave a whole new meaning to the
words.  "Let him finish, Giles," she begged.  "I think everyone has
the right to know what she'd been feeling.  A little glimpse into what
she was going through, perhaps?"

Giles thought for a few moments, then hesitantly said, "Alright, Oz.
Please finish."

Oz took the guitar from Giles with slightly trembling hands, "Okay.  I
hope I've done her justice."  And he continued to play and sing.

"Well I'm surprised that you'd believe
In anything that comes from me
I didn't hear from you or from someone else
And you're so set in life, man
a pisser they're waiting
too damn bad you get so far so fast
so what, so long

(chorus)
"Reach down your hand in your pocket
Pull out some hope for me
It's been a long day, always
ain't the right
And no Lord your hand won't stop it
Just keep you trembling
It's been a long day
always
ain't that right

oh, ain't that right"

Oz lowered his voice to a whisper:

"it's me, yeah and I can't get myself to go away
It's me, yeah and I can't get myself to go away
Oh God, I shouldn't feel this way"

Oz raised his voice to a shout:

(Chorus)
"now
Reach down your hand in your pocket
Pull out some hope for me
It's been a long day,
always
ain't the right
And no Lord your hand won't stop it
Just keep you trembling
It's been a long day
always
ain't that right"

When Oz finished, the group that had been so excited about an
awesome tune, were reflecting on their missing friend.  Quietly and
without thinking, they all moved towards each other at the same time
until they met in a small circle.  Wrapping arms around each other,
they shared in a group hug and a group cry.


************
Like? Hate?  Feedback is always welcome!  [e-mail]






-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: dreamscape <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC:  Torn Between Two Lovers 6/? by Dreamscape205
Date: 08 Jun 1998 12:23:55 -0400

TITLE:  Torn Between Two Lovers 6/?
AUTHOR:  Dreamscape205
EMAIL:  [e-mail]
DISTRIBUTION:  Anya, I'll submit it directly through the Slayer's
Fanfic site.  Anyone else, it's okay as long as you give me credit,
and email me with the URL I can find it archived.
SUMMARY:  A new love...or two... in Willow's life
RATING:  PG-13
TYPE: UTB
SPOILERS: none that I know of...
DISCLAIMER:  BtVS and its character's belong to Joss Whedon, the WB,
Fox, and Mutant Enemy.  No infringements intended!

Author's Note:  text enclosed in < > represent thoughts and feelings.

********

Part six

Angel was thankful that Willow remained unconscious while he carried
her through the streets of Sunnydale.  Once at his apartment, he
hoisted Willow over one shoulder to dig the keys to the apartment out
of his pants pocket.  After struggling with the lock for a moment, he
finally pushed the door open and carried Willow directly to the
couch.  He gently laid her down upon the soft leather, placing a
pillow under her head for comfort.

Willow didn't stir, and this worried Angel considerably.  He found no
open wounds on her head or her shoulders.   Chase had taken the full
brunt of the blow from the table, Willow had merely been knocked
down.  The only explanation was that she had been weakened by the
encounter with Chase.

The vampire wandered into the kitchen, returning with a cold cloth and
placed it on Willow's forehead.  She stirred, mumbling something
unrecognizable and turned onto her side, drawing her legs up into the
fetal position.  Angel knelt beside her, retrieving the cloth which
had fallen to the floor during her movement, placing it on her neck.
He tenderly brushed aside the tendrils of hair that covered her
cheeks.  "What's happening to you, little one?" he whispered.

A loud pounding on the door startled Angel from his crouched
position.  He leaped at the door, looking almost like an animal
pouncing on its prey, demanding, "Who's there?"

"Just who do you think it would be?!" a voice barked from the other
side of the door.

Angel opened the door without hesitation, and Buffy rushed past him,
and stood over Willow's prone form.  Buffy was breathing hard;  she
had run to Angel's from the Bronze.  "Your friend...what's his name...
took Xander...how's Willow?" she labored, as she tried to catch her
breath.

"Count Chasjove Logoczy," Angel stated simply.  "Chase."   He moved
back to sit on the arm of the couch above Willow's head and began
stroking her hair.  "And he's not my friend,"  He spat.

"So...you *do* know him?" Buffy questioned.  < Come on, Angel.  I
don't have time for fifty questions. >  She placed her left hand on
her hip and gestured to him with her right, "Look, spill it.  Whatever
you know, just get it out on the table.  Two people's lives are at
stake, and we don't have time for the cryptic guy routine."

Angel's head snapped up, glaring at Buffy, "You don't have to tell me
what's at stake." A low growl escaped him as he stood to face her,
"So, Chase has Xander?  Let me guess...he wants to exchange?"

Buffy nodded, her eyes resting upon Willow's sleeping face, "Yes, he
wants Catherine, I mean Willow, brought to him tonight. I don't even
know where to find him."  < What am I going to do?  Willow's in mental
danger...Xander's in mortal danger. >  Plopping herself into a nearby
chair, she said, "I need to call Giles.  Before I do...I want you to
tell me what you know."

Angel began pacing around the room.   "As I said, his name is Count
Chasjove Logoczy, but the name he currently uses is Chase Logan.
Seeing him tonight made me understand what had been bothering me about
Willow for so long.  His wife, Catherine, and Willow, they are almost
identical."

Buffy frowned, "You knew Catherine, too?"

"Briefly," he nodded, concentrating on his memories.  "I met her just
before she was killed over two hundred years ago.  Chase never got
over it and vowed he would find Catherine again.  I didn't believe he
would ever find that certain someone he would use to replace her."
His pacing increased and he lashed out, more to himself than to
anyone, "Why didn't I see it?  How could I be so forgetful?"

"Angel, that was a long time ago.  Memories fade," she offered him a
half smile, "please, tell me more."

Angel's expression became forlorn as he recounted the details of his
past.  "I was in Budapest around the year 1787, Chase had staked that
territory decades before, and it's customary to report to the HVIC
when you arrive.  That was when I first met Chase and Catherine."
Angel continued to pace as he talked.

"HVIC?"  Buffy's head cocked sideways as she watched Angel pace the
room.

"Head Vampire in Charge," Angel stated flatly.

"Clever.  Keep talking."

"The townspeople were holding their yearly festival to celebrate
harvest.  I had arrived in Hungary for just that reason...easy
pickings.  Drunk and happy people become careless people,"  Angel
explained uneasily.

"Um...I guess," Buffy frowned.

"Anyway, the festival lasted five days and I didn't want to wait until
the final evening to indulge in a mass feeding.  I just wanted to rush
out and devour whatever I came in contact with.  It didn't take long
to charm Catherine into joining me," Angel concluded.

"I can imagine," Buffy scowled, "I suppose Catherine could have used
'the face of an angel brought out the devil in me' excuse."

"Clever," Angel returned her earlier barb, "should I continue?"

"Please."

"It was only the second day of the festival, and townspeople were not
quite as careless as I'd hoped.  When Catherine and I began the
rampage, it didn't take long for them to come to their own defense.
They attacked us in mobs, fighting with any and every weapon they
could find.  I managed to escape with only a few cuts and bruises that
healed quickly...Catherine was not so fortunate."

Buffy sat upright in the chair, "What happened to her?"

"She lost her head...literally."  Angel said matter of factly.

"Ugh...not a pretty story.  Remind me never to ask you to tell me any
bedtime stories."  Buffy quipped. "Anyway, that explains how you know
Chase and why he dislikes you."

The Slayer turned to see that Angel had resumed his post by Willow,
gently stroking her hair.  Buffy was still unsure of how she felt
about the two of them together, but that thought faded as she saw the
pain he was in.  She went to him, enveloping him within her arms in an
attempt to comfort him, "We'll find a way to bring her back, and to
save Xander."

Angel nodded and attempted a weak smile as Buffy pulled away and
walked to the desk to picked up the telephone receiver, "Time to call
Giles...we need to fill him in on what's happened to Will."

The telephone was answered almost before the first ring finished,
"Uh...hello, this is Rupert Giles."

"Giles.  We've got a problem."

"Hmmm? Well, what is it this time?"  he asked curiously.

"Yeah, well, it appears that the new vamp in town has a yen for
redheads," Buffy retorted.

"He has Willow?"  Giles' concern emanated over the telephone line.

"No.  Xander."

"Xander's hair is brown," Giles was clearly confused.

"Very observant...I guess that's why you're the Watcher."  Buffy
joked, but the humor fell short.

"Buffy, be serious!"  He scolded.

"Sorry, couldn't resist.  Anyway, we managed to get Willow away from
him, but he's done something to her mind.  During the fight he knocked
Xander out and took off with him after telling me to bring him Willow
in exchange.   Giles, he believes Willow is the reincarnation of his
dead wife, Catherine."

"Oh, my..."

"That's not the half of it.  Apparently, Willow now thinks she's
Catherine, too."  Buffy continued to relate the events of the night to
Giles.

When she was finished there was a moment of silence on the line before
Giles spoke, "We could try hypnosis.  I'm afraid I don't know all that
much about reincarnation, but it may restore her true consciousness."

"It's worth a try.  Please get here as soon as you can."

Just as the receiver was laid in its cradle, Willow began to stir.
Her eyes flew open and she began to survey her surroundings.  She
noticed the girl at the club who had tried to stop her from joining
Chase, and then her eyes fell upon the handsome man who was standing
next to her.  "Angelus," she spoke aloud.

Startled, Angel spun around in the direction of the voice, "Willow!"
But the eyes that stared back at him were not the eyes of the young
woman he had become so completely enthralled by.  These eyes were cold
and distant.

'Catherine' sat up, "Angelus, how could you forget who I am?  After
all...we shared my 'death' together."  She stood and walked towards
Angel.  As she neared him, her hand rose to gently touch his cheek,
"But, fear not, darling Angelus, we will share in your death soon..."






-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: dreamscape <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Torn Between Two Lovers 7/? by Dreamscape205
Date: 08 Jun 1998 12:30:14 -0400

TITLE:  Torn Between Two Lovers 7/?
AUTHOR:  Dreamscape205
EMAIL:  [e-mail]
DISTRIBUTION:  Anya, I'll submit it directly through the Slayer's
Fanfic site.  Anyone else, it's okay as long as you give me credit,
and email me with the URL I can find it archived.
SUMMARY:  A new love...or two... in Willow's life
RATING:  this part is more PG-13
TYPE: UTB
SPOILERS: none that I know of...
DISCLAIMER:  BtVS and its character's belong to Joss Whedon, the WB,
Fox, and Mutant Enemy.  No infringements intended!

Author's Note:  text enclosed in < > represent thoughts and feelings.

*******

Part Seven

GILES' RESIDENCE

After hanging up the telephone, Giles ran to the piano on the far side
of his living room.  "Never thought I'd need this for more than
tempo," he commented to himself as he picked up the metronome sitting
on top of the piano.  Grabbing his car keys, he raced outside to his
car and headed for Angel's apartment.

OUTSKIRTS OF SUNNYDALE - LOGAN'S RESIDENCE

Xander regained consciousness and surveyed his surroundings.  < Where
am I? >  Taking note of the large desk and ample amount of books, he
decided he was in a study or a library of some kind.  He noticed the
ceiling to floor windows that were covered in floor-length drapes,
velvet and dark red in color.  Then his eyes fell upon the portrait
directly across the room from his position on the sofa.  < Willow. Or,
is it?  They look exactly alike...except for the eyes.  Willow's eyes
are warm and tender.  These eyes are ice-cold...dead. >

There was a noise in the direction of the doorway.  Xander turned his
aching head towards it, "You.  Why have you brought me here?"   He was
surprised by the calmness of his voice when his insides felt like an
earthquake was happening all around and within him.

"You are a means to an end," Chase responded arrogantly.  "Your friend
will bring me Catherine to exchange for your life.  It is that
simple.  There is no alternative for her."

Xander snorted, "There's no Catherine.  There's only Willow, a young
girl who's mind you have obviously clouded somehow with memories of
this 'Catherine'."  Xander grew angrier by the second.  The thought of
his best friend since childhood being "erased" was more than he could
stand.  "How dare you take one life to substitute for another?  Who
made you God?"

Chase's face clouded with pain for just one instant and disappeared
quickly.  "You are in no position to demand answers.  I do not have to
justify my actions to anyone.  Catherine should never have been
killed, if for the impetuousness of that insipid Angelus she would
still be here."

Xander shook his head and spoke with resentment; "This justifies what
you're doing to Willow?  Take your anger out on Angel for whatever
he's done, but leave Willow alone."

Chase spun to face Xander, eyes burning with hatred, "For what he's
done?  The fool!  Because he would not listen, and because Catherine
was easily charmed by him and followed him blindly, she was beheaded!
Do you hear me?!  Beheaded!  That libertine...he...he..." Chase
trailed off as he got his emotion under control.  < I don't have time
for this. >   He motioned towards Xander and spoke in a dismissive
tone, "Just shut up.  This will be over soon."

Xander watched Chase open the door of the study that lead to the
hallway.  A guard was standing directly outside.  < In case I decide
to make a break for it. >  A second person, which Xander assumed was
also a vampire, appeared almost immediately.  Xander heard Chase
speak, "It's time, Judson.  Lead them here...bring her to me."

Judson bowed, "Yes, my Master."  And he was gone.

Xander prayed silently that Buffy had a plan to get them out of this.
The look that Chase bestowed upon him as he exited the study was one
that told their future.  Whatever his intentions for Willow, his
intention for the rest of them was death.

Chase was angry with himself for letting that boy get the better of
him for just an instance.  He felt a small twinge of guilt for
destroying one life to bring back his beloved.  <   No matter, the end
result is the most important. >


ANGEL'S RESIDENCE

Giles pounded on the door to Angel's apartment.  As it opened he
sputtered, "I got here as quickly as..as I could."  He nodded to Angel
as he entered, and Angel closed the door behind them.  Buffy was
sitting in a chair on the far side of the room intently watching the
girl that was sitting on the couch.  The Slayer's eyes never left the
girl, even when Giles approached her and spoke softly to her.  "Buffy,
if this is going to work, we'll need to get her cooperation."

Buffy shook her head and whispered, "Just how do you think that's
gonna happen?"

Buffy watched as Angel approached "Catherine" and sat beside her.
"Catherine" immediately stiffened her posture and looked at him
cautiously.  She may have been on the intimidating side when she first
woke, but the longer she stayed in their company, the more unsettled
she became.  < Her strength is Chase.  She's weak without him. >

Angel took "Catherine's" left hand and held it in his right.  He
looked deep into her eyes and tenderly touched her right cheek with
the fingertips of his left hand.  She looked at him as if mesmerized
and leaned towards the touch of his hand as if it was a comfort to
her.

"Look." Buffy motioned to Giles to watch Angel with Willow, "You won't
have to do anything after all.  It seems Angel knows that vampire
trick of hypnotizing his victims just as the Master did.  The only
difference is that Angel's method seems more sensual."

"Um...yes, so it appears."  Giles agreed and watched in fascination.
It took Angel mere seconds to do something it takes trained
professionals sometimes an hour or more.

"What's your name?" Angel asked as he looked into Willow's face.

"Catherine," she said staring at him with lifeless eyes.

Thinking it best to keep it simple, he asked, "Where are you?"

"I do not know."

"Why have you come back?"

"To be with my love."

Growing impatient, he demanded, "Where's Willow?"

"She is.... you will never see her again."  Catherine sounded almost
vindictive even in her hypnotic state.  Somehow, she sensed Angel's
need to make sure Willow was unharmed and did not want to give him the
satisfaction of any information regarding the girl who's body she
inhabited.  "Soon you will be dead and it will not matter."

"How will I die?" Angel continued the interrogation.

"By my hand."

At that moment, a shadow of pain crossed Catherine's face.  A tender
sob escaped her lips and tortured eyes looked into Angel's, "Please,
Angel...you must not try to help me."  Loving hands cupped his face as
she struggled for control.

Angel leaned close to hear her tormented whispers.  When she next
spoke her lips brushed against his, "I can't stop her...too strong.  I
have seen...in my dreams...your death."  Tears streamed down her face
as her lips touched his, "I love you....Angel....please....don't let
me..."

As her words trailed away, Angel again looked into the dead eyes of
Catherine.  "Willow!"  The name came from within him half scream, half
growl.

"She is gone.  Forever."  Catherine closed her eyes and
unconsciousness overcame her.

Angel's rage was unleashed as he stood, grabbing the coffee table and
launching it across the room, where it smashed into pieces against the
wall.






-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: sah <[e-mail]> (by way of sah <[e-mail]>) (by way of sah <[e-mail]>)
Subject: BUFFYFIC: ADMIN:  List rules
Date: 09 Jun 1998 09:24:32 -0400

Welcome!  This list is for fiction related to "Buffy The Vampire
Slayer," both the TV series and the movie.  To ensure that we all get
to enjoy as much fiction as possible, please adhere to the following
guidelines, and please save them for future reference.

1. Fiction should have Buffy characters in it and clearly be related
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This ensures that anyone who doesn't like knowing about an episode
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[e-mail]


-







-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "The Mistress" <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: "My Name Is..." 1/1
Date: 09 Jun 1998 13:17:35 EDT

Title: "My Name Is..."
Author: EA Karras
Emails: [e-mail] or [e-mail]
Part: 1/1
Distribution: My website, and The Slayer Fanfic (I've allready submited
it manually) Everyone else, ask.
Spoilers: to be safe, I'll say the entire 2nd season, but I think it's
only one or two eps.
Disclaimers:  Everything Buffy belongs to the allpowerful Joss Whedon,
Mutant Enemy and The WB Network. "Is This" belongs to Oingo Boingo,
Danny Elfman and MCA. This is for entertainment only.
Comments: My first Xanderfic.  Bear with me if I don't get him right.
This stemmed from a really wacked out dream I had of Slayerettes
Anonomous.  Very scary. (Not the fic)

-----------------------

<"Another place another time/Another face that looks like mine/Another
soul for all to see/Is this reality?">

"My name...my name is Xander Harris.  I'm 17 years old, and I live in
Sunnydale, California.  I had two friends before Buffy Summers moved to
town, and now I have more, but I lost the two most important to me. I
have a girlfriend, but I don't think I really love her.  I hate school,
like any normal teen would, but it doesn't matter. "

<"If I could only find the words/I'm sure that they would go
unheard/With one exception I can see/Is this reality?">

"My name is Xander Harris, and I'm 17 years old.  I haven't loved that
many people in my life, but those I've loved I've managed to alienate.
By my relationship with Cordelia Chase, I've alienate the girl I've
known since childhood, and probabally would've grownup to marry.  By
lying to Buffy, I've killed her lover."

<"Oh, If I could only make time stand still for a moment/ Capture a
memory/and live it one more time/ but I believe">

"My name is Xander Harris, and I'm 17 years old.  I live on a hellmouth,
and I think about death to much.  I make jokes to coverup my fear, but
lately I've just wanted it to end.  Somehow I've lost most of what I
cared about, and I don't know how to get it back."

<"That I would really change a thing/A second chance to get it right/I
think the end is close at hand/I had a vision I don't understand">

"My name is Xander Harris, and I'm 17 years old. I miss Buffy, and I
miss Willow......and I don't think I love my girlfriend...I think The
Watcher hates me, and I don't know why..."

<"Don't you see/I was made for you and you for me/Close your eyes/Are
you ready for a big surprise?">

"My name is Xander Harris, and I'm afraid.....I'm afraid my friend won't
come home, and that the vampires will be able to finally take over
Sunnydale if she doesn't.  I'm afraid that Oz will hurt Willow, and I'm
afraid that Cordelia will hurt me..."

<"Oh, hold the clock/Say the words to make it stop/Now, Slam, Bam, Thank
you Ma'am/Wasn't it a pleasant life we shared?/Now who really cares?">

"My name is Xander Harris, and I want Buffy to come home...I'm want
everything back to normal, and I want Willow to love me..."

<"Why pretend you don't remember?/Wipe it clean and start again/Hope to
see you in the summer">

"My name is Xander Harris, and I'm 17 years old.  I have loved, lost and
I'm definetly still bewildered."

<"Another place another time/Another face that looks like mine...">

"My name is Xander Harris, and I'm sorry...."

<"Another soul for all to see/Is this . . . Is this . . .">

*****

The End




______________________________________________________
Get Your Private, Free Email at http://www.hotmail.com



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: LadySun <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Charlotte Sometimes (part 30)
Date: 09 Jun 1998 12:21:43 -0700

I know I'm being *really* Bad about this. And I'm sorry!
    I'll warn you now this isn't one of my better chapters! (again, I'm
sorry) But I wanted to get it out, I've been stalling enough.
    There's violence still... So you've been warned.
    As always I own nobody (save for Dru's family and friends... But
they're all dead or dying soooooo... *g*)

    Enjoy!

Charlotte Sometimes (part 30)


    She was asleep when he found her. It was much harder then he would have
thought. There must have been a hundred cells in this place, each filled
with anywhere from 2 to 10 prisoners. Witches.
    He'd over looked her the first time, but when he came back to look in
the small window he saw it was her.
    Angelus backed off for a moment. Looking at her hideous form.
    He should have known. He'd seen the horrors of these places. Heard of
what could happen, but never in his imaginings could he see her
beautiful form so distraught and hurt.
    They'd chained her up. Her arms where tied to a large pole in the
middle - more or less of her dungeon and her ankles where tied to a bolt
going straight into the ground.

    He pushed his body away from the site, he knew his face had contorted
to that of the demon inside of him. And his low growls could most likely
be heard by the young girls inside the hideous pit.

~

    "Nah? Wauh?" Desiree's eyes scanned the surrounding area as she heard
the voice. "Drusilla?" She asked, looking over at the sleeping girl.
    At least she hoped Drusilla was sleeping, she was too far away to tell,
but Desiree was fairly sure Dru still breathed. "Drusilla!" She hissed
kicking the girl with the tip of her toes.

~

    Drusilla came awake with a shocking start.
    She didn't have stun, or wandering's of where she was. Why she was in a
cold, dank place instead of a warm bed.. No, she knew exactly where she
was, and what was going on. Having that scared hopeless nausea when
Desiree began to cry.

When her new friend told her someone was here.

    Timidly Drusilla got unto her knee's shoving the heavy chains so she
could move, and began to crawl to the wooden wall looking out into the
hallway of tortures.
    Her whole body began to shake and she could feel a cold sweat taking
over her body.
    Her mind alone willed her hands to etch further and her knees to still.
And so it was that she got to the heavy wooden door and pulled herself
to her unsteady feet to look out the tiny window high on the door,
looking out through bars.

    She crumbled down to the floor and sighed.
    "No one is there Desiree. You must have been dreaming" She said gently,
as she crawled back near the window. Back near her friend.

~
    Desiree's eyes cast downwards. She could still here the voice. The
growl the --
    Desiree's eyes shot upwards to look at the window.

    "Drusilla!" She shouted looking upwards.

~

    "Hush!" Drusilla hissed, terribly afraid the guards would hear and see
herself awake and ready to be interrogated yet again.
    Dru looked back down at her body. Her ankle was terribly sprung.
Possibly broken! It was swelled largely and turned further from blue to
a darker black color.

    The men, the interrogators had stripped her first looking for witch
marks - looking for any sign or place that the devil could enter her.
    The thought made her sick.
    The devil! She.. She could *never* serve him. She was a good Catholic.
A pure, good, loving-- when they found no witch marks they assumed the
devil had found a new place to enter. Some place on her body that would
have little feeling, or no feeling.
    They'd not found a place, because there had not been a single area on
her body that when poked with a hot spike or some other means she'd not
screamed out.
    The pain became to much as it was, and she'd passed out during the sign
of confession.
    When she'd awoken she'd been here, with Desiree, and with clothing.

    "Drusilla! Dru-- Drusilla!" Desiree continued to cry.
    "What is it?" She hissed not meaning the venom in which it had come out
as. She was just under tremendous stress.
    Drusilla followed Desiree's eyes towards the window.

    Her heart skipped a beat "Angelus!" She cried out.
    Her body flew upwards, and jumped, purposely ignoring the pain in her
ankle and caught her good foot on the stubbled rocks of her prison,
clamping her hands around the window's bars.

~

    Angelus snickered as Drusilla pressed herself as close to freedom as
she could get.
    "They think I'm a witch!" She cried, tears already streaming down her
face.
    "My mother.." She couldn't finish the sentence, though the thought was
hardly lost. "Y-y-you where there! You were t-there Angelus! You-you
need to tell them!"

    Angelus all but rolled his eyes at her fanatics. And she noticed.
    She noticed the utter uncaring in his voice, the looking away. The
smirking!

    There was a pause, as Drusilla looking into Angelus's eyes intently,
trying to see if her convictions were true...
    "How'd you get there?" She asked, her large eyes widening. "How were
you there? In the woods where she... Where, Isabelle was...?"

~

    "What?" He asked. He'd been actually expecting a 'thank-god you're
here' rather than an accusion

    "You were..." Her mouth went dry, and the tears once again stopped. A
vision assaulted her senses. A Simple image. Angelus leaning over
Isabelles body, holding her arms pinned above her head, and looking down
into her eyes... "Did you do it?" She asked, looking at him, her large
eyes trying to pierce his soul.

    Whether she pierced his soul or not he flinched. "Drusilla?" He asked
back "how could you think that? That I could hurt them?" his words
carefully leveled themselves as he spoke softer and slower. "That I
could hurt you?"

~

    Oh god! Her head cried. She'd just accused the only man she'd ever
loved. That'd ever loved her of killing her family!
    "I-I-I-" She looked away, her fingers slipping from the rails as she
lost the will to hold on.

    His fingers slid over hers holding her there. She looked up. He was
smiling at her. Giving her hope. "I'm sorry" she finished.

    Angelus shook his head. There was no need for sorry's.



--
_-SuN-_

SD - Http://home.earthlink.net/~kbleyle/SD/index.html

    Daylight licked me into shape, I must have been asleep for
days. And moving lips to breathe her name, I opened up my eyes
And found myself alone alone, Alone above a raging sea
That stole the only girl I loved, And drowned her deep inside
of me (The Cure)

_ - _Spikette _ Dru's Dolly - Mercenary_ - _
  _ - _ Head Dominatrix in the Evil _ - _
_ - _   Plan For World Domination, _ - _
  _ - _ With Chains and Stuff _ - _



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "Jennifer M." <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Best Intentions 10/12
Date: 09 Jun 1998 12:31:31 PDT

TITLE: Best Intentions
AUTHOR: Jennifer M. ([e-mail])
SUMMARY: What would happen if Buffy's mom found her diary?
RATING: PG.
TIME PERIOD: Maybe past Becoming 1?
THANKYOUS:  Thanks Leslie S.!
FEEDBACK: Please!  Any constructive criticism would be greatly
appreciated.
DISTRIBUTION: Please ask.
DISCLAIMER: All characters are the property of Joss Whedon, et al.  The
idea is mine, though!

WARNING!WARNING!WARNING!WARNING!WARNING!WARNING!WARNING!WARNING!
The death of a main character takes place in this chapter.  Please do
not read any further if this will effect you adversly.  I didn't want
to, but, I had no say in the matter.  This story pretty much wrote
itself.  My apologies.

~~
Best Intentions Part 10

Buffy opened her eyes, and took stock of the situation.  She
couldn't believe what she was seeing.  The four people to whom
she is closest in the world were ready to fight for her.  Die for
her!  'Not today,' she thought.

She had nothing to fight with.  'Dammit!'  Her mind raced for a
way to beat Angelus.  Or, at least chase him out of the room!  He
was standing to her left, between the bed and the door.  The four
were just inside the doorway.  She looked at Willow, still not
moving, and tried to get the girl's attention.  'Willow!'  She
screamed silently.  'Look at me!'  But, Willow did not.  'Willow!'
She tried again.  'Where is that psychic sense when you need it?
Willow!'  Finally!  Willow was looking at her.  Buffy motioned
her to be quiet.

"Give me your stake!" She mouthed to the girl.  Willow's eyes
opened wide.  "Come on!  Now!"  She mouthed again.  Willow threw
the stake at Buffy, praying she would catch it. "Willow!  Untie my
feet!"  Buffy yelled and aimed the stake at Angel.
Everyone turned to look at her.

"Aw, look who's up," Angelus drawled.  Willow was working
desperately to untie the restraint on Buffy's right foot, while
Xander moved quickly to untie the left.

"That's right, Angel," she said sweetly.  "If I were you, I'd get
out of here before I'm untied.  Or all that's left of you is going
to fit quite nicely into an ashtrayà"

Joyce and Giles moved away from the door, to give him the option
to leave.  "Aw, Buff, you know and I know that you can't kill me.
Your precious Angel is still in here somewhere.  He's constantly
fighting to get out," he sneered.

"Well, Angelus, let's test that theory," she said as she stood up
on her bed.  She could have sworn she saw fear flash through his
eyes.

"You don't look too threatening in that nightgown, Buffy," he
growled as the demon within appeared on his face.  "Let's get
this over with.  Now!"

He lunged at her.  Buffy quickly stepped out of his way.
Joyce screamed and lurched forward as Giles
again had to restrain her to keep her from jumping
into the fight.

"Come on Angel, can't you do better than that?"  Buffy taunted
him.  She jumped off of the bed to the opposite side of the room,
and aimed the stake at him.  She knew what she had to do.  She
was finally ready.

He lunged towards her again, and slid on the floor grabbing
her legs as he fell.  She fell along with him, fighting all the
way.  The others watched in horror, as the two ex-lovers fought
for their lives and crashed into the far wall.  "Buffy!  Watch
out!"  Joyce yelled at her daughter.

Angelus grabbed the back of her head and smashed it to the floor.
She looked up at him more determined than ever, as blood began to
trickle out of her nose.  "You really shouldn't have done that,"
she said, her voice cold.  The intensity in her eyes told Angelus
what was about to happen.

She reached around him and with a quick decisive move, staked him
in the heart.  Tears filled her eyes as she looked at him for the
last time.

He smiled in that instant before he turned to dust.  "Thank you.
I loveà" and he was gone.  Buffy collapsed to the floor, sobbing.

"Buffy, honey.  Oh my God," Joyce ran to her daughter.  She fell
to the floor and pulled her daughter into her arms.  "Oh Sweetheart.
I am so sorry.  I am so sorry."  The two sat on the floor, and
Joyce rocked her daughter.

Giles, Xander and Willow watched with wonder the touching scene
taking place.  "Oh, uh, I think we should leave.  Buffy, Mrs.
Summers, we'll wait for you outside," Willow said.

Mother and daughter sat on the floor crying.  As the three opened
the door, a nurse came through, wondering at the commotion.
"What's going on in here.  What happened to Nurse Collins?  What
is going on!"

Giles took charge and led her into the hallway.  Xander and Willow
 followed him.

"Come on, Buffy, it's time to get you out of here," Joyce said to
her.  "I'm so sorry, sweetheart for not listening to you.  I should
know better.  Come on, let's go."

"Mom?  Thanks for coming to get meà" Buffy said through her
tears.

"Oh, honey, I'm just sorry I didn't come sooner."

Buffy remembered, just as her mother started to pull her up off of
the ground.  "Wait!"  She bent down and scooped up a handful of
ashes.  She looked her mother in the eye, "OK.  I'm ready."



______________________________________________________
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-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: [e-mail] (Charity C. T.)
Subject: BUFFYFIC: My Heart's Confession (1/1)
Date: 09 Jun 1998 14:25:12 -0700

Name: My Heart's Confession
Author: Taygeta
Address: [e-mail]
Feedback: Please!
Uses in anything: Sure, but tell me first.
Spoiler: Not really, a smidgen of a mention about Prophecy girl
Disclaimer: The Buffy characters portrayed in this story and any other
references to Buffy the Vampire Slayer are the property of its creater
Joss Whedon, and its owners Mutant Enemy productions, Kuzui Productions,
Sandollar Productions, and 20th Century Fox.
Rating: PG

***************************

My Heart's Confession
By: Taygeta

    "Okay, Buffy, there's something I have to tell you," Xander said
with a deep breath as he began to pace back and forth in the room.  "I
know I told you this a long time ago, but that was then, and this is now,
and times have changedàat least I hope so."

    "See the thing is, I - Ià" he paused, closed his eyes, and his
fingers fell to his chin, almost as if he were trying to get his jaw to
work properly.  "I - I might as well let you know thatàwell, that I'm in
love with you."

    He paused for the reaction, upon seeing none, he continued, "I
tell myself constantly that I should stopàthat I have to move on.  And
although I know I shouldàBuffàI can't because of youà you're the one I
want.  God knows that I don't even deserve your recognition of me, but as
much as I tryàas much as I force myself to look awayàbe away, I always
have to return because you're always there when I return.

    Xander exhaled deeply and his eyes darted to the ceiling in
contemplation as to what he wanted to say to her next, "Just tell me,
Buffy, tell me that the answer I got before isn't the same as it is
today?"

    <That was easy, > thought Xander as he sat down on the edge of
his bed,  <now, If only I can actually say it to her faceà>

_____________________________________________________________________
You don't need to buy Internet access to use free Internet e-mail.
Get completely free e-mail from Juno at http://www.juno.com
Or call Juno at (800) 654-JUNO [654-5866]



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "Leslie S." <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Wet and Wild (1/1)
Date: 09 Jun 1998 17:04:14 PDT

TITLE:  Wet and Wild
AUTHOR: Leslie S.
E-MAIL: [e-mail]
DISTRIBUTION: Sure as long as I know about it.
RATING: PG-13  for Adult Content
SUMMARY: When Xander inadvertently eavesdrops on Willow and Oz, he just
canÆt believe whatÆs going on!
DISCLAIMER: All characters are borrowed from Joss Whedon and crew.  No
infringement is intended.
FEEDBACK: Writer cannot live by bread alone.

Thanks to Jennifer M., Lynn, Mina, and SuperPixie


Xander Harris stopped mid knock as he stood listening at the bedroom
door of one Willow Rosenberg.  He could not believe what he was hearing!

Oz:  Are you sure Willow?

Willow:  Yes, Oz I am.

Oz:  You know it'll probably hurt.

Willow: I know, but I can't wait any longer.  Besides, itÆs all wet now.
If we wait, it may not be as easy.  You'll be gentle with me won't you?

Oz:  How can you even ask that question?  I love you.  I'd never hurt
you.  Intentionally that is.  Cause I can pretty much guarantee this IS
gonna hurt. OK, here goes.

After a few moments...

Willow:  Oh Oz...That feels so good.  Could you go just a little slower?

Oz: Sure...Is this better?

Willow:  Mmmmmm.... Much better.

Oz:  Oh good...Does it still hurt?

Willow:  Just a bit.   But if you went a bit faster now, and to the
right, I don't think I would mind so much.

Just as Xander was trying to pry himself away from the door, he saw Mrs.
Rosenberg heading up the stairs with a tray of cookies and three glasses
of milk.  < My god!  I gotta head her off. > Xander thought.  It was
hard enough for him know what was going on behind Willow's door, but he
couldn't imagine what Mrs. Rosenberg's reaction would be!

"Mrs. Rosenberg!" Xander exclaimed in a very loud voice, hoping to alert
Willow to the presence of her mother.

"Xander?  What are you doing out here?  Aren't they through in there
yet?"

"N---N---No?"  Xander stammered, unable to accept that Mrs. Rosenberg
not only knew what was going on but also came bearing post-coital
snacks.

"If you'd come by earlier, it might be you in there instead of Oz."

"Huh?"

"I guess they will be done soon.  Oh, there's the phone.  Here Xander."
Mrs. Rosenberg thrust the tray at him.  "Can you take this in for me?"

"Uh...sure Mrs. Rosenberg," Xander replied weakly, accepting the tray
before she could disappear downstairs.

Just then he heard Willow let out a brief cry.  Xander's stomach did a
flip-flop realizing the implication of the cry.  It was all so hard to
take in.  Willow, his Willow, was having...having   s--se--se--  (he
couldn't even think it) with wolfboy *and* her mother not only knew but
somehow didn't mind.

Willow cried out again, obviously in pain.  That did it for Xander.
Nobody hurt his Willow.  Without so much as knocking, he flung open the
door to Willow's room and burst in, pretty sure of what he would see.
He was never more wrong.

Oz was *not* sprawled on top of Willow in her bed as Xander had been
prepared to see. Nor did it seem that Willow was trying to get away from
him.  Instead, he found the redhead seated at her desk with Oz standing
right behind her, a brush in one hand and scissors in the other.

"Goodie!  Snacks!" Willow exclaimed.

"Wil, Oz...youÆre notànot uhàwhat *are* you doing?" Xander asked
hesitantly, trying to take in the scene before him as he set the milk
and cookies down on the desk.  He felt the flush of embarrassment begin
to creep up from his neck, to his chin, up his cheeks, and finally stop
at his forehead.  Xander didnÆt even need to think about his burning
ears!

"My mom had to help me wash my hair, cause I still have to be careful of
the stitches.  But we ran out of conditioner.  And you know how wild my
hair gets when itÆs wet.  Especially if I donÆt brush it out right away.
So when Oz showed up early, he offered to brush it out for me." Willow
explained.

"But thereÆs this knot that I canÆt get out, so I have to cut it out."
Oz explained, waving the scissors as if to emphasize his statement.

"Is it really big?"

"DonÆt worry," Oz reassured his girlfriend.  "ItÆs only small
knot-sized."

"ThatÆs good cause I donÆt want to be missing a clump of hair like the
last time Xander offered to help me with my hair," Willow playfully
admonished.

A look of mock hurt crossed XanderÆs face.  "That was *not* my fault,
and besides, we were eight."

"Xander," Willow began.  "Not that I really mind, but whyÆd you come
bursting in here like that?"

"ItÆs actually kinda funny.  Before I came in, I could hear you guys
from the hallway."

"So?"

"Well it sounded like you were uh hav-, that you two were um-"

"What?" Willow cut Xander off.

"Itsoundedlikeyouttwowereinherehavingsexandyourmotherknewandit
soundedlikeOzwashurtingyou."  Xander spoke in one large breath.

"You thought we were having sex?" Oz asked, a bit surprised at what
Xander had been thinking.  "With WillowÆs mom home...thatÆs crazy."

Xander visibly relaxed.  < What was I thinking? > he thought to himself.
This was after all *Willow*.

"Yeah silly," Willow began.  "We only ever have sex in the back of OzÆs
van!"

--Endù


My humble fan fiction page (3 whole BVS stories to date)can be found at:
http://beavis.intercom.net/~lilsprout/fanfic.html


______________________________________________________
Get Your Private, Free Email at http://www.hotmail.com



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: Jeff Weitkamp <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Looking for a proofreader.
Date: 09 Jun 1998 22:02:57 -0700

Hi everybody.

 I'm new to the list and I'd like say tha I am really enjoying reading
your stories.

 I've been working on a couple of stories for submission. But before I
posted them I was wondering if anybody would be willing to Proof read
them for me.

 Thanks everybody and keep upo the good work.

 We now return you to your regular program



  Jeff  [e-mail]



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "Jennifer M." <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Best Intentions 11/12
Date: 10 Jun 1998 10:17:41 PDT

TITLE: Best Intentions
AUTHOR: Jennifer M. ([e-mail])
SUMMARY: What would happen if Buffy's mom found her diary?
RATING: PG.
TIME PERIOD: Maybe past Becoming 1?
THANKYOUS:  Thanks Leslie S.!
FEEDBACK: Please!  Any constructive criticism would be greatly
appreciated.
DISTRIBUTION: Please ask.
DISCLAIMER: All characters are the property of Joss Whedon, et al.  The
idea is mine, though!

~~~
Best Intentions Part 11

The drive home from the hospital was a long one, Buffy thought.
She kept staring out of the car window, trying not to cry in front
of her mother.

"So, honey, do you want to talk about all of this?"  Her mother asked.

"It's not that I don't want to discuss this, because I do. I know
you have a lot of questions. But, I have a raging headache.  Could we
talk about this in the morning?"  She asked warily.

Her mother looked hurt.  "Sure honey."  The rest of the ride was
in silence.

Buffy went straight to bed, carrying a bud vase with her when she
got home.  The ashes had been placed, lovingly, into the container.
She would always have him near.  She thought about how she had
to stake Angel and felt the tears well up in her eyes, again.  "I can't
think about this now," she told herself determinedly.  She sniffed and
crawled under the covers.  It didn't take long for her to fall asleep.

"Buffy.  Buffy wake up," someone was sitting on her bed, stroking
her hair.  "Buffy.  Hey, sleepy girl.  Wake up.  I know you're
tired, but there's something important that I have to tell you."

Buffy opened her eyes, slowly.  Not really believing what she
was seeing.  "Angel?"

"Hey.  I'm sorry I had to wake you.  You looked so peacefulà"

"Angel?"  She said, still stunned he was there in her room, on
her bed, touching her so gently.  "Is it really you?  Am I
dreaming?"  She was still half asleep.

"No.  Buffy, it's really me.  But I only have a couple of minutes
before I have to go.  I need to tell you something."

She sat up in her bed and threw her arms around him, loving the
feel of him next to her.  "I can't believe you're here!  You're
really here."  She couldn't seem to let him go.  She inhaled his
scent: the light cologne and leather from his jacket were almost
overpowering.

He clung to her just as tightly.  "Oh Buff.  I'm so sorry for
everything.  I'm sorry I wasn't strong enough to stop all of this.
I can't even begin to tell you how sorry I am.  But just know that
I would not do anything to hurt you.  I love you so much.  And
today, you saved me.  You released me from the prison that I was
in, and I can't thank you enough," he said into her hair.

"Angel, I'm so sorry that I had to do that.  I thought I would die
before I could kill you.  I'm so sorry," she sobbed.

"Buffy, don't cry.  Please.  We should be happy that we were
granted this short time.  I have to go soon, so let me finish what
I came to tell you. It is killing me to know that I hurt you, but
I want you to know that I did everything I could to stop it."

"Angel, I know.  I know," she cried onto his shoulder.  "I love
you.  I will always love you."

"You have to move on with your life.  Don't feel any guilt for
killing that demon.  He deserved to go to Hell, and that is where
he is.  Remember, I'll be waiting for you.  But don't feel like
you have to rush to meet me.  Live your life.  Be happy.  I love
you."

He started to disappear in her arms.  "No!  Angel, don't go yet.
Please!"  He stopped.

"Buffy, I have to go.  Kiss me.  Hurry."

She reached up, and kissed him.  He was gone.  It was the softest,
sweetest kiss either of them had ever experienced, and neither
would ever forget.

"Good bye, my Angel.  My love," she said to no one.

~~

______________________________________________________
Get Your Private, Free Email at http://www.hotmail.com



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "Jennifer M." <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Best Intentions 12/12
Date: 10 Jun 1998 10:22:10 PDT

TITLE: Best Intentions
AUTHOR: Jennifer M. ([e-mail])
SUMMARY: What would happen if Buffy's mom found her diary?
RATING: PG.
TIME PERIOD: Maybe past Becoming 1?
THANKYOUS:  Thanks Leslie S.!
FEEDBACK: Please!  Any constructive criticism would be greatly
appreciated.
DISTRIBUTION: Please ask.
DISCLAIMER: All characters are the property of Joss Whedon, et al.  The
idea is mine, though!

~~~
Best Intentions Part 12

When Buffy woke, sun was streaming through the windows.
She looked at her nightstand, and there was a single red rose in
the vase next to her bed.  "It was real.  He was here," she smiled
sadly.

Buffy got out of bed, pulled the rose out of the vase and smelled
it.  She smiled again.  Then, she attached the rose to a hanger,
letting it dry upside down in her closet, so she could save it
forever.

She went down to the kitchen, where she heard her mother.
Tentatively, she poked her head through the door.

"Good morning, honey.  I made your juice, just the way you like
it.  Two parts orange one part grapefruit!  Can I make you something
to eat?"

"Mom, relax.  We're gonna be ok.  I understand why you did what
you did.  I'm not upset.  If I were you, I'd have had me in a
loony-bin a long time ago!"  Buffy smiled at her mom.  She reached
for the glass of juice and a thought crossed her mind.  "Oooh, I'm
gonna be late for school."

"Well, actually, I was thinking we'd both stay home today, and you
could tell me exactly what has been happening in your life.  I
still don't understand why you are the Chosen One.  Why not some
other girl?"

Buffy smiled at the question.  "Mom, I've been asking myself that
for two years.  I still don't have an answer.  And, I have a really
hard time dealing with it sometimes.  Then there are other times
it's like, no big deal.  Ya know?  I mean, I go out and I slay
vamps.  And, sometimes, some other creepy-crawlies are thrown
into the mix.  Yeesh."  She shivered.

"You seem to be in a good mood.  Is that what comes from sharing
your deepest, darkest secret with your mother?"  Joyce smiled at
her daughter.

"Yeah, mom, that's it," she smiled.  "I have so much to tell you."
Buffy said to her mother as she went to her and hugged her tightly.

"Ok, lets get dressed, and go for a walk," Joyce suggested.  "Maybe
we could pack a picnic?"

"That sounds great.  Give me five," Buffy smiled at her, turned
and ran out of the kitchen.  She was nervous about what awaited
her but had faith that her mother would understand.

The End

It's finally done!  Please let me know what you think of my
story, or if you missed any parts.  I can get those to you.
Thanks for reading!
[e-mail]

______________________________________________________
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-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: "Syndicate: Termination" (1/1)
Date: 11 Jun 1998 06:35:58 EDT

Notes: This is the first in a set of short pieces I'm working on, when I feel
like it. Each is a stand-alone fic, but they string together as well. Enjoy!
Disclaimers: The Syndicate is mine. Everything else is Joss'.
Feedback: Yes, please. This is the first serial-type story I've written, I'd
like to know how it is. To [e-mail], if ya don't mind.
Distribution: Not without my permission, please.

~

                          "Termination"
                         By Rachel Brody

     "Mister Giles," came the intrusive, nasal voice from the
doorway.
     Wincing, Giles turned to the doorway. "Yes?" he asked, hoping
his tone didn't belay his opinion of Principal Snyder.
     The short, trollish man walked into the room, stopping a few
meters away from where Giles stood. Saying nothing.
     After a few seconds of silence, Giles began to get the
distinct feeling that something was wrong. The smile on Snyder's
face was far too broad, and everything about the man screamed
satisfaction, even happiness. "Is something, is there something
wrong?" Giles asked.
     "Oh, no..." Snyder said, the grin growing. "Not a bit wrong."
From where they had been clasped behind the smaller man's back,
Snyder's arms came forth, producing a small, pink piece of paper.
"It's been great having you here, Mr. Giles, but the fact is you've
outlived your usefulness."
     His brow knitting in confusion, Giles glanced down at the
sheet, just long enough to see the words printed in bold black
lettering across the top: "Notice of Termination". His jaw
dropping, but only slightly, Giles looked up from the paper and
into Snyder's satisfied gaze.
     "I've been waiting for this day," Snyder said, sounding as
close to ecstatic as Giles had ever heard him. "For a lot longer
than you know."
     Giles frowned. "Might I ask for, for some sort of
explanation?"
     Snyder chuckled. "Go ahead." A smirk fell into place on the
principal's normally disapproving features. "Ask."
     "What, whatever am I being dismissed for?" Giles asked.
     Snyder grinned. "Because I think you're a risk this town is
far from prepared to face," he said, with such ease that Giles knew
immediately the words had to have been practiced. Before the
Watcher could make some sort of objection, Snyder continued, his
expression still more fitting to a child let loose in a candy store
than that of the usually grumpy school principal. "Your...shalle we
say...extracurricular activities...with some of the students here
have not gone unnoticed, Mister Giles."
     "What do you mean by tha--"
     "Miss Summers. Mister Harris. Miss Rosenberg. Miss Chase."
With each name, Giles felt his gut twist. First, he wanted to push
the idea that Snyder could be referring to anything but the
unwritten code that governed how teachers interacted with students,
and how by spending time with Buffy-- when she had been here-- and
the other children, Giles had been breaking that code. But the
longer the seconds stretched out, the more certain Giles was that
Snyder meant something far more specific.
     Still smiling, so hard that Giles was almost certain his face
would crack if he didn't stop soon, Snyder continued. "The city
council has decided that without Miss Summers around as a loose
canon these days, having a member of the Watcher Network around is
just...well, not a risk we want to take."
     Giles frown deepened as he realized he had severely
underestimated the damage that had been done here. Snyder wasn't,
apparently, speaking as an isolated observer with an insight...he
was speaking as someone in league with a larger force, and backers
behind him.
     "That's right," Snyder said, nodding at Giles' reaction. "We
know. Everything." He shook his head. "Gotta admit, the Network had
us scared for a while there. But well, your Slayer just couldn't
stand up to the pressure." The grin faded slightly. "Hey," he said,
giving Giles a slight pat on the arm in mock consolation, "you
know, the history museum is always looking for fossils to put on
display...you might want to recommend to your friends back at
Dredwood Castle that they think about donating themselves as a
specimen of a dinosaur that lasted far past its time."
     Giles shook his head, the realization of just what faction
Snyder must be speaking for coming into his head a little clearer.
He cleared his throat as the principal moved toward the door, and
the little man stopped, turning back.
     "Yes?" he asked.
     Giles glanced back down at the paper Snyder had passed him a
few moments ago. "I _will_ find her," he said, feeling his stomach
twist as an image of Buffy flashed into his mind. "And when, when
I do-- you'll realize that revealing yourself at this point in time
was, was an extremely idiotic course of action."
     Snyder looked at him for a moment, then chuckled and shook his
head. "Sure," he said. "Whatever you say." He chuckled again, then
abruptly the humor was gone, and Giles felt a chill pass through
him as he saw a flash of something darker, more dangerous than
simple anal-retentiveness spark behind Snyder's eyes. "By the way,"
he said with a grin that was somehow more malicious than those
Giles had seen on the faces of most human beings. "The books?
Thanks for keeping them here-- made for a de_light_ful read." The
thought of the little troll going through Giles' precious tomes was
enough to spark the fire of fury within the Watcher, but Snyder
gave him no chance to speak. "You've got till the end of the day to
clear your things out," Snyder said as he turned toward the doors
of the room. As it swung back, the principal out in the hallway,
Giles cringed. He could hear Snyder whistling, the sound fading as
the little man retreated down the hallway.
     Giles let his gaze sink to the paper in his hand once more,
resting there for a moment before moving to his books, the ones he
had kept out since Buffy had left, knowing that chances of her
actually returning became slimmer with each passing day.
     He sighed. And now, she wouldn't even be able to find him
here. One more obstacle.
     With a sigh, Giles glanced toward the clock, calculating the
number of hours it would be until the bell rang at the end of the
day. Knowing that if the Snyder was working on the behalf of the
Syndicate, there was no way the Network could pull enough strings
to keep him his job. Minimizing the damage was the only possible
way he could see to make it through this. He had to warn Xander,
Willow, Cordelia, and Oz, as well. He hated to think of what might
happen if the Syndicate knew of the Slayerettes, and realized full
well that if they knew who he was and who she was, they most likely
knew about the other children as well.
     But for now...
     Giles looked about the room, wondering if there was any way he
would be able to pack his things in time, realizing he had no real
choice.
     With a sigh, he walked toward his office, hoping that the
cartons he had used to move his things into the library would still
be around so he could use them to pack up and leave.
     He let the termination notice flutter to the floor in the
middle of the room, hardly noticing it as he left it behind.

THE END
(...for now)

Copyright 1998
Rachel Brody

Comments to [e-mail], please.



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: Mark <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Spike's Wild Ride (1/1)
Date: 11 Jun 1998 08:59:30 -0700

TITLE: Spike's Wild Ride (1/1)
AUTHOR: Mark
EMAIL: [e-mail]
DISTRIBUTION: OK in any online FanFic archive. Contact the author
about any other distribution.
RATING: PG13.
CONTENT: Adult concepts.
SPOILERS: Becoming
SUMMARY: Spike's ride out of Sunnydale with Dru. Picks up right where
Becoming leaves them.
FEEDBACK: All feedback welcome and encouraged.
DISCLAIMER: These characters are owned by some combination of Joss, Mutant
Enemy, the WB, and Fox. No infringement on their rights is intended.

"Spike's Wild Ride" by Mark

Spike drives wildly out of Sunnydale. Feeling little stabs of pain as bits
of sunlight find him through the car's painted windows.

Suddenly Drucilla bolts up in her seat, pulling away from Spike. She
begins to speak, in one of her spookier voices, "Angel... He's gone."
She turns towards Spike, attempts a glare, and asks somewhat distantly,
"What have you done?" Her eyes close as she slumps back down into the
seat, oblivious again.

Spike's plan had worked out so much better than he'd even hoped. The
slayer had somehow actually managed to kill Angel. Sure, Dru would be
upset with him, for awhile. But, with Angel gone for good, things would
just have to return to normal between them.

This slayer's capabilities had surprised him, again. But hey, Spike
thought, I probably just did help save the world -- imagine that.
Memories of his bargaining with the slayer roll through his head, as he
drives on.

This Buffy seemed exceptional, even as Spike compared her to the other
slayers he'd known -- and killed. So alert, so bright, so very alive,
so not Dru.

Spike's thoughts of Buffy take an unexpected turn. He no longer sees
Buffy the Slayer, he sees a demonized Buffy. Sees what a beautiful
vampire she would be. He sees himself on the hunt with Buffy. Sees how
powerful she is as she takes another victim. What a team they make. Who
could stand against them, and survive? He continues to daydream about
Buffy, the vampire, as he drives on...

Dru begins to stir, disturbing Spike's daydream. He reaches over and
pulls his Dru close again. The images of Buffy quickly fade from his
mind. Spike can't as easily shake his feeling that they're going to be
facing that Slayer again. The thought inspires in him a strange mix of
concern, excitement, and anticipation. He drives on, wanting to leave
Sunnydale far behind, for now.




Mark - [e-mail] - http://btvs.cjb.net




-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: "Hell" 4/?
Date: 11 Jun 1998 18:46:36 EDT

"Hell" 4/?
by Jaclyn Amy

TITLE: Hell
AUTHOR: Jaclyn [e-mail]
DISCLAIMER: I do not own any of the characters from Buffy the Vampire Sla=
yer.=0AThey belong to Joss Wheden, Mutant Enemy, 20th Century Fox, etc.
RATING: PG-13
WARNING: Some of the scenes have some gory violence. If you don=92t like =
that=0Asort of thing, don=92t read this.
SPOILERS: None.
SUMMARY: This takes place immediately after Becoming Parts 1 and 2. It=92=
s=0Apretty much my own episode after this. Enjoy!
DISTRIBUTION: Ask me first.
FEEDBACK: Please!
AUTHOR=92S NOTE: I have finals to study for, so these will probably come =
out=0Asparatically.
***
=09//Damnit,//Giles thought as he knocked on the door. //Where could she =
be?//=0AHe anxiouly knocked again.
=09The door swung open and Pike came out. "Can I help you?"
=09"Are you Pike?" Giles asked.
=09"Who wants to know?"
=09Buffy appeared behind him. "Buffy, what the Hell=92ve you-"
=09"Let him in," she said.
=09He charged right passed Pike to Buffy. Before he could say a word, she=
 hugged=0Ahim. "I=92ve missed you so much."
=09"Buffy," he pulled away, "you have to come home."
=09"I can=92t," she said bitterly. "Too many memories, to many faces I do=
n=92t want=0Ato see, to many deaths." Tears started dripping down her fac=
e. "Please,=0Aunderstand where I=92m coming from. I can=92t go back to wh=
ere Angel=85"
=09"We=92ve found a way to bring him back. They are all working on it. So=
, by the=0Atime we get there-"
=09"Hold on, I=92ll go pack."
=09Within a minute she was ready to go. "I=92m going to miss you, Pike." =
She=0Ahugged him close to her. "Your the only person that I knew I could =
go to."
=09"I=92m going with you."
=09"No, you can=92t it, it=92s too dangerous. You=92re better off here."
=09"I am going to go with you. I can=92t lose you again. Buffy, I love yo=
u."
=09"Pike-"
=09"No, let me finish. I=92ve loved you since the day I layed my eyes on =
you. I=0Adon=92t care that you=92re not like all the other snobs. Remembe=
r the night before=0Ayou left. We both said that we would always love eac=
h other."
=09"Pike, I, I don=92t love you like that. I love you as one of my best f=
riends.=0AAngel is the one I love. I=92m sorry that I didn=92t keep my vo=
w. I couldn=92t once=0AI met=85" Seeing the sad look on his face, she sai=
d, "You can come."
=09They both walked out to the car. "Let=92s go, Giles."
***
=09"Oz," Willow asked, "isn=92t it the night before the full moon?"
=09"Yeah," he said.
=09"Then we=92re out of here."
=09"Run that by me again because this is making the sense that isn=92t."
=09"Well, when you=92re a werewolf, you=92ll try to get out of the cage r=
ight? And=0Ayou=92ll be strong enough to break through."
=09"What about the I try to eat you part?"
=09"Oh yeah=85HELP! HELP!"
***
=09"Buffy!" Angel cried
=09Drusilla stood with Xander at the top of Sunnydale Falls waiting for B=
uffy.=0A"Poor dearie," she whispered into Xander=92s ear, "don=92t worry,=
 it=92ll all be=0Aover soon."
=09As if on cue, Gile=92s car was coming down the road. "Stop," Buffy sai=
d, "this=0Ais funky." She stepped out of the car.
=09"Hello, dear," Drusilla said, "I was hoping you=92d come."
=09"What are you doing here?" Buffy sneered. "Spike said-"
=09"You don=92t worry your pretty little head about Spike."
=09That=92s when Buffy noticed Xander standing behind her. "Xander," she =
cried as=0Ashe started to run over to him.
=09Drusilla had grabbed his throat, but Buffy easily kicked her arm. She =
then=0Aproceeded to throw a punch towards her, but Dru blocked it, grabbi=
ng her=0Athroat.
=09"Look at me, Buffy," she said. Using her other hand, she pointed to he=
r face.=0A"Be in my eyes. Be in me." She let go of Buffy.
=09Buffy just stood there, unable to move.
=09"Buffy," Cordelia cried, running with Willow. The two stopped when the=
y saw=0ADrusilla.
=09Drusilla took Buffy=92s cross of her neck, burning her hand, and threw=
 it down=0Athe falls. She grabbed her neck so hard she couldn=92t brethe.=
 "Go, fetch," she=0Asaid as she threw Buffy over the falls.
=09"Buffy," Pike cried as he jumped in after her.
=09All the rest could do is watch as Buffy=92s body hit the rocks below.
***
End Part 4




-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: "Hell" 5/?
Date: 11 Jun 1998 18:48:08 EDT

"Hell" 5/?
by Jaclyn Amy

TITLE: Hell
AUTHOR: Jaclyn [e-mail]
DISCLAIMER: I do not own any of the characters from Buffy the Vampire Sla=
yer.=0AThey belong to Joss Wheden, Mutant Enemy, 20th Century Fox, etc.
RATING: PG-13
WARNING: Some of the scenes have some gory parts. If you don=92t like tha=
t sort=0Aof thing, don=92t read this.
SPOILERS: None.
SUMMARY: This takes place immediately after Becoming Parts 1 and 2. It=92=
s=0Apretty much my own episode after this. Enjoy!
DISTRIBUTION: Ask me first.
FEEDBACK: Please!
AUTHOR=92S NOTE: I have finals to study for, so these will probably come =
out=0Asparatically.
***
=09Xander gently pushed a strand of Buffy=92s hair off the side of her fa=
ce. The=0Awhole left side of her face was torn up. Almost all the nerves =
were severed,=0Aand they were going to graph skin on if she woke up. She =
had hit her head=0Aagainst a rock when she hit the bottom and was now in =
a coma. She had broken=0Aher right arm, twisted her right knee, broke her=
 left leg in five different=0Aplaces, and had broken her entire rib cage.=
 She had scrapes and bruises=0Aeverywhere. There had been a lot of intern=
al bleeding, and she was very close=0Ato death. Surely if she wasn=92t th=
e Slayer she would be dead all ready.
=09Giles, Cordelia, Willow, and Xander were standing silently in the room=
. Pike=0Awas having x-rays taken, and it was still nighttime so Oz was a =
werewolf.
=09Mrs. Summers came running in the room. "Oh my God, Buffy!" she whisper=
ed in=0Ashock. Her hand covered her mouth as tears started running down h=
er cheek.=0A"Buffy." She put her hand to her daughters ripped up cheek.
=09"I=92m sorry, but visiting hours are over," said a nurse. "All of you,=
 out."
=09"I, I=92m her mother," Mrs. Summers said.
=09The nurse replied, "Fine, you can stay, but the rest of you have to le=
ave."
=09Everybody slowly exited to go to the library.
=09After the nurse left, Mrs. Summers went to see a doctor to find out he=
r=0Adaughter=92s condition. Pike cautiously went into the room to see Buf=
fy. He sat=0Ain the chair next to her and held her hand.
=09"Oh, man, Buff, you have to wake up. I, I can=92t live with this. It w=
as hard=0Aenough losing you the first time. I can=92t lose you again." He=
 dropped to his=0Aknees. "Buffy, I love you, and I want you back."
***
"Put these on. Get under the covers, just to warm up," Angel said.
Buffy walked over to his bed and sits down. She looked up at him and gave=
 him=0Aa look. Turning around to give her privacy, he said, "Sorry."
She took off her top shirt and winces and inhales in pain.
"What?" he asked.
"Oh, um... It's okay. I just have a cut or something."
He started, "Can I... Lemme see."
Buffy clutched her shirt to her chest and whispered, "Okay." Angel turned=
=0Aaround and sat down on the bed behind her. He gently touched her back =
and=0Alooked at the cut.
"It's already closed. You're fine." She leaned back into him and cuddled =
her=0Aface to his. He put his arms around her.
"You almost went away today," she said, holding back tears.
"We both did."
She started crying. "Angel... I feel like I lost you... You're right, tho=
ugh.=0AWe can't be sure of anything."
"Shhh. I..."
She turned around to look at him. "You what?"
"I love you. I try not to, but I can't stop."
"Me, me, too. I can't either."
They started to kiss. After a moment he broke off. "Buffy, maybe we=0Asho=
uldn't..."
"Don't. Just kiss me."
Buffy slowly opened her eyes to see a place she had never been before. //=
That=0Awas really freaksome,// she thought. //It was just like the night =
Angel and=0AI=85// She could feel the evil vibes all around her. //Where =
am I?// she=0Athought.
=09She turned around to see Angel sitting in front of her. He looked weak=
 and=0Apale. His shirt was ripped, and he had a cut on his face. His face=
 was buried=0Ain his hands. "Angel?" she asked.
=09He slowly opened his eyes to see his Buffy standing in front of him. "=
Buffy?"=0Ahe asked as he stood up. He pulled her into his arms. "Oh, God,=
 Buffy. "This=0Aisn=92t you. It can=92t be you."
=09She held onto him for a few moments and stepped away. Tears started fa=
lling=0Adown her cheeks. "I, I thought I lost you."
=09"I=92m right here. I=92ll always be here for you."
=09"How can you say that after I-"
=09"It=92s not your fault. It=92s the only way it could=92ve been."
=09"But I-"
=09"Shhh=85" he whispered as he leaned in to kiss her. She embraced him=
=0Apassionately. They just stood there together, arm in arm, kissing.
=09"Where, where are we?" she whispered.
=09"You have to get out of here, Buf. You don=92t deserve to be here."
=09"Angel, just tell me where we are."
=09"Hell."
***
=09"Are we all ready?" Xander asked. He stood before Acathla ready to per=
form=0Athe ritual.
=09"Yep," Willow said. "I=92ve got the knife."
=09"Be careful," Cordelia whispered to Xander before kissing him.
=09Giles asked, "Did you memorize what I gave you?"
=09"Yes, now lets get done with this." He started to speak, " I will drin=
k...=0Athe blood will wash in me, over me, and I will be cleansed. I will=
 be worthy=0Ato free Acathla. Bear witness as I ascend... as I become. Ev=
erything that I=0Aam, everything that I have done, has led me here. I hav=
e strayed=85I have been=0Alost. But Acathla redeems me. With this act, we=
 will be free."
***
=09Buffy suddenly felt a pain in her neck. She put her hand to touch it, =
and=0Afelt a vampire bite. Her life felt like it was being sucked out of =
her.
=09"Buffy, what=92s wrong?" Angel asked.
=09"A vamp bite," she said, feeling faint. She started to fall, but he ca=
ught=0Aher.
=09"Buffy, what happened?"
=09"I, I don=92t know." Her eyes started to close. "Angel, I love you."
=09"I love you too. I=92m not going to let you die. I-"
=09"Just kiss me=85"
***
"Acathla... Mundatus sum... pro te necavi. Sanguinem meum...
pro te effundam... quo me dignum... esse demonstrem," Xander said. Willow=
 gave=0Ahim the knife.
"Now, Acathla, you will be free." He took the knife and cut his hand. Cor=
delia=0Awinced as the blood started to trickle down. "And so will we all.=
" He grabbed=0Athe sword that was in Acathla and pulled it out.
***
Before Angel got a chance to kiss her, a vortex opened. He suddenly felt=
=0Ahimself being pulled out. "Buffy=85" he whispered. Just after the last=
 bit of=0Alife in her body was gone, he disappeared.
***
=09The group watched on as Angel came through the vortex. "Buffy," he cri=
ed.=0A"Where=92s Buffy?"
=09"She=92s at the hospital. She was in an accident-" Willow said. Before=
 she=0Acould finish, Angel ran out of the mansion and to the hospital.
***
=09"Well, well, well, look what we =91ave =91ere," Drusilla said as she w=
alked into=0Athe hospital room. Only Pike was in there, and she knew she =
could easily take=0Ahim.
=09"You leave her alone," he said.
=09She easily grabbed his throat and threw him into the wall, knocking hi=
m out.=0A"Night, night."
=09She walked over to Buffy=92s unconscious body. "You killed my Angel," =
she=0Acried. "And now, I=92m going to kill you." With that said, she stuc=
k her fangs=0Ainto Buffy=92s neck.
***
End Part 5






-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: [e-mail] (Ingrid E Stanton)
Subject: BUFFYFIC: "Someone Had Blundered" (1/1) by Ingrid
Date: 11 Jun 1998 20:46:11 EDT

DISCLAIMER: The characters I use from Joss WhedonÆs
"Buffy the Vampire Slayer" are not mine. ThatÆs why they
call it "Joss WhedonÆs æBuffy the Vampire Slayer,Æ" and
not "IngridÆs æBuffy the Vampire Slayer.Æ"

SUMMARY: A little vignette-type story about Angel in the
past. IÆve had some requests to give Angel a personality,
since he basically has none on the show, and in addition,
the intro to "Becoming," part one was  disturbingly mundane.
Inventing a personality is tough. Pardon me if I project a little.
<g>à

THIS WAS INSPIRED by AngelÆs comment during
"Halloween" - "I hated the girls back thenà"

NOTE: While I take my finals, hereÆs something for you to
chew on. I wrote this a few weeks ago, and as of yet, I
have no time to finish "Reunion" until finals are finished
on Wednesday.


***
"Someone Had Blundered"
--Virginia Woolf
***

He watched the almost-white curls bouncing behind her as she
walked away from the house. She was holding the skirts of her
solid pink dress as not to drag the pretty thing through the
mud. She was small on a whole, but her figure was delicately
curved and full of the fertility of life.

He imagined the expression on her face as she walked. She would
be pleasantly smiling at the neighbors, offering a kind word even
to the poorest of them. Her large blue eyes would be sparkling;
pieces of the sky themselves.

"Beautiful, isnÆt she?" he recalled the thin voice in the back of his
head.

He hated her. She was disgusting to him. Somehow, in her presence,
he felt more acutely and completely alone than ever before, and that
was saying a lot. It was almost a pleasurable feeling while she remained,
speaking of her daily activities, and her busy schedule for a girl her
age. He felt far superior. She was a beast, and he allowed himself the
amusing task of comparing her stupidity to his intelligence; her
narrow-mindedness to his capacity for philosophy, a vast and forever
expanding world. She was a fool, he knew, and while she talked, he
mocked her words. Inside. Little did she know.

Sometimes sheÆd stay too long and get annoying. It was on those
occasions that he pictured himself strangling her by the throat, and
the idiotic expression on her face when he told her what he knew
she was.

But even then, he amused himself. She was a puppet, and a stupid one
at that. He was not so much a puppeteer, but rather a little God,
looking on at the whole thing and laughing at both puppet and
puppeteer.

But then she would leave. Something punctured his little fantasy
then, and heÆd fall. No one knew of his genius. He was indeed
alone, because they were all like her. He hated them. They were
fools. And he *was* quite like a God. He was alone.

HeÆd even considered letting her in on his little secret of perception
once. But then heÆd looked at her pathetic sweet face, watching him
pleasantly as always, and realized that it would be quite like telling
a cow of Voltaire.

Maybe some mistake had been made. He didnÆt belong to this world.

And then back to that paper by the window. He crawled up by the
seat and fumbled with his jacket, throwing it on the floor to wrinkle.
"Life is meaningless," he wrote, "People are cows, going about their
stupid business, and they never stop to think about *it.* They never
stop to think, because theyÆre incapable of thinking. TheyÆve never
had a thought, and never will, because they donÆt know what thinking
is. TheyÆre cows, waiting to die." He closed the book, and suddenly
felt freshly deflated, as if sheÆd just left him. In truth, it had been
hours.
***
END

_____________________________________________________________________
You don't need to buy Internet access to use free Internet e-mail.
Get completely free e-mail from Juno at http://www.juno.com
Or call Juno at (800) 654-JUNO [654-5866]



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: [e-mail] (Charity C. T.)
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Capeside: the Hellmouth (9/?)
Date: 13 Jun 1998 12:44:07 -0700

NAME: Capeside: the Hellmouth #9 Common Bonds

AUTHOR: Taygeta

ADDRESS: [e-mail]

FEEDBACk: Please send

DISTRIBUTION: Ask me first.

SPOILER: Not really, considering that this is a crossover story.

DESCRIPTION: A crossover with Buffy and Dawson's Creek

DISCLAIMER: The Buffy characters portrayed in this story and any other
references to Buffy the Vampire Slayer are the property of its creator
Joss Whedon, and its owners Mutant Enemy productions, Kuzui Productions,
Sandollar Productions, and 20th Century Fox.  The Dawson's Creek
characters  portrayed in this story and any other references to Dawson's
Creek are the property of its creator Kevin Williamson, and its owners.
In other words, these characters do not belong to me, and I am just
borrowing them.
Rating: PG

**************************
Capeside: the Hellmouth
#9 Common Bonds
By: Taygeta

    There was a hush in the Bronze as all eyes turned to see the
scene unfolding at the door.  Willow struggled to free her hands, but
despite her efforts, the death grip on her wrists made escape by way of
her magic impossible.  Her widened eyes looked at her friends for
helpàhelp she wasn't sure they could give and they weren't sure they
could provide.

    "Let her go," Buffy said threateningly as her eyes met Pacey's in
a glacial glance.

    "Please...it's going to take a lot more than that for me to give
you your little witch back," he replied with his nonchalant air.

    "You better do as the lady says," a voice said from behind them.

    Pacey's critical eye scrutinized Oz momentarily before retorting,
"Whatàyou?  Oh come on, slayeràyou could do better than to pit him
against the likes of me."

    "Do you know what you're problem is?" questioned Oz as he
approached them, "You think far too much of yourself."

    "And what do you plan to do about that?" the vampire leader said
with raised brows.

    Pausing for a moment, Oz thought, and then he closed his eyes to
ensure that total concentration could occur on his part.  The strange
chants that came from his voice surprised everyone, especially those that
though they knew him very well.  Apparently, there was a lot more to the
wacky, funny Oz that they could have possibly thought.  The Latin phrases
that spilled from his lips echoed loudly in the silence of the room.

    As helpless as Willow was at that moment she whispered the words
in English, "Oh, Minerva, the greatest goddess, who has wisdom, and thus
holds the power.  Help me.  Help me.  Take away the darkness and free thy
daughter's vessel from their clutches."

    A blue glow surrounded Oz, and it flew from him at lightening
speed and encircled Spike, Cordelia, and the rest of the Vampire Brigade.
 Before Cordelia could even react with a counter magic spell, they had
disappeared from the Bronze, leaving Willow behind them.

    "Nowàwhy couldn't we do that back in Sunnydale?"  Xander asked
glancing at Buffy, "Take the entire pack of them and drop them off in the
Sahara desertàno worries."

    "I don't think it's that simple, Xander," she told him and they
glanced over at Oz for a response.

    "She's got a point, this is a one-spell, meaning it can only be
used once," he explained and then grinned as he saw Willow approaching
him.

    "Thanks," she said and upon sensing her uneasiness Oz quickly
said your welcome, but her eyes drifted to the staring crowd and under
her breath she continued, "Uh-oh."

    Jen peered at the rest of the Scooby-Doo gang and said, "Ya think
the cat's out of the bag?"

    Willow looked at the crowd and then glanced at her friends, "No
problemàOz, help me out here.  Remember the forgetful spell that everyone
cast on their mortal friends when they were first learning magic?"

    "Oh, yeahàused it all the timeàstill do," he said, and then he
looked at the crowd, "àbutàumàit was usually just one person or two at
the most."

     "Just a play on words, change the word unus or duo to totus, and
it'll work," she said as she chewed on her lower lip, "àI think."

    "Okayàif you say so," he said with a shrug as they both faced the
still staring, and now whispering crowd.  He and Willow began a spell,
which roughly translated was, "The mind contains images of things you
have not seen, for they are but the dreams of dreams.  Those seen tonight
are those images contained, so let them contend to be what they really
are, mere ideas of the nightà"

    A few seconds later, the band began to play again, resuming the
slow song that had been played earlier, and the rest continued dancing,
conversing, etc.  The witch and the wizard looked at each other with
great satisfaction, and their friends smiled with the knowledge that they
had just gained a new member to, what Xander dubbed long ago, the
Scooby-Doo Gang.

    Willow glanced at Oz and said, "Y'know, I think Giles would be
proudà."

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

    Giles adjusted his glasses to read the dusty cover to one of the
various books in Niles Pertrue's possession.  He and Miss Calendar had
spent the entirety of that Saturday trying to organize the late Watcher's
belongings, taking the books and weapons to a more secured location.
They were doing this with much haste because it would not be long that
his family would come to Capeside to survey the value of his estate.

    "Anything interesting?"  Miss Calendar asked as she walked by him
holding a box filled with various books she had found in the rest of the
house.

    He glanced at her and nodded, "Y-yes, it's the missing volume to
the books found in the attic.  I'd rather not speak ill of the dead, but
your Niles was certainly a tad unorganized."

    She had to laugh as she placed the box on the floor beside him,
"Oh, you don't have to tell meàI know it all too well.  I suppose that
that was why we were so great with each other.  He was the only one I
knew who was more hare-brained than I am."

    "WellàI suppose everyone's mind begins to faze at some point or
another," he said, knowing how messy his desk back at school was, "but I
was really surprised that you didn't find anything in the refr - "

    "Oh, guess what I found in the broken refrigerator in the attic,"
Ms. Calendar handing Giles a crossbow, "It's pretty old, but I think
it'll do."

    He frowned and paused, taking the crossbow from her hands,
"Umàthank youàthat Niles must have been a very great man, and very lucky,
tooàto have you."

    Ms. Calendar smiled, "I think that was the first nice thing you
have said to me since we met, and yes, Niles was really wonderful."  She
sat down with a sigh on a crate that sat on the basement floor beside the
shelf of books and trinkets, "SoàI told you all about my Niles, but what
about you?  Got a girl back homeàor do your Watcher duties make that
impossible?"

    Giles glanced at her hesitantly, before replying, "UmàI had an
extraordinaryàbeautifulàintelligent woman, of whom I lost shortly before
theàuhàtime occurrence."

    Her grin faded and a look of empathy set in, "OhàI'm sorry,
Rupert, I didn't realizeàI - I'm sorry."

    "Thank youàJenny, I've coped, butàumàof course I still miss her a
great deal," he said softly and then when he met Miss Calendar's eyes.
He could recall so many things about the woman he loved and lost by just
looking into those familiar eyes, but this wasn't her, and so he looked
away, again.

    With that, their conversation ended, and so continued the task at
hand, as they began, again, to arrange and pack the diverse objects that
had been in Niles Pertrue's ownership.  They talked very little after
that, saved the discussion of certain objects found and those that needed
to be found, but there was an undeniable newly found closeness between
them now.  Despite past and present differences, they had found their
common bond.  A bond of love and lost that explained their strengthàtheir
relentlessness to stop the dark from closing in.

_____________________________________________________________________
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Get completely free e-mail from Juno at http://www.juno.com
Or call Juno at (800) 654-JUNO [654-5866]



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "Tracy Cain" <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Re: Third Child (3/?)
Date: 13 Jun 1998 19:39:43 PDT

Name: The Third Child
Author: Rihanon
Address: [e-mail]
Feedback: This is my first story, so please share! Good? Bad? Ugly? I
crave this information!!!!!!!!
Distribution: Anya can have it, anyone else who wants it can e-mail me
and ask.  I'll say yes, but please ask first.
Summary: Angel and Buffy discussed stuff.
Spoilers: uh- What's My Line? Definitely before S/I, though.
Disclaimer: In no way am I creative enough to come up with the
characters used in this story.  If you recognize anything, it's not
mine, and belongs to the evil Joss.
Warnings: Some violence, a little angst.
Rating: PG/PG13

Author's Note: Nearly every piece of feedback I get is just a request
for story parts. I'm ceretainly willing to send previous parts, but I
need oppinions/critisisms/ANYTHING! Please, people, tell me what you
think!

******************
The Third Child: (3/?)
By Rihanon
******************

*****
Angel stared down at the Slayer as she slept.  She had cried
on his shoulder for hours; pleading with him not to leave.
It broke his heart to see her hurting and know that he was
the cause, and the pain was made even worse by the knowledge
that a few words from him could have lifted her spirits and
stopped her tears.  The remembered sight of her sobbing almost
caused him to break down; but he summoned the memory of
Rasitin, and the image of those insane, hate-filled eyes was
enough to bolster his resolve.  As a vampire, Rasitin had been
his greatest triumph - but even then, when he'd been considered
one of the most vicious and dangerous vampires *ever* to walk
the night, he had feared Rasitin.

He glanced slowly around the room, trying to remember every
aspect of his apartment, of the sleeping Slayer, of the life
he'd managed to build for himself that he would now be forced to
leave behind.  Closing his eyes, he bent down next to Buffy and
kissed her on the forehead gently.  Then, before he could change
his mind, he turned and left his apartment, refusing to look back
for fear that if he did he would be unable to make himself leave.

******

"I don't suppose you'd care to share this wonderful plan of yours,
mate?" Spike inquired sarcastically.

The laugh he got in return was chilling in it's emptiness.
"Spike, don't you trust me?  Have you *ever* known me to fail to
take my target?"

"I just don't understand your game.  Why not just kill the bloody
Slayer? And, for that matter, how in Hell did she kill your pet
demonling?"

"I had been under the impression," drawled the figure in a soft
voice, "That you were interested in more than simply their
deaths; I came here because you wanted *suffering*.  And she
didn't kill my wraith; I banished it."

"Why?!?!  If you wanted to play with the girl, why not grab her
when your pet had her down?  What - "

"You know Spike," the other vampire hissed, "this constant
questioning is starting to get on my nerves.  I wanted the
Slayer to take a message for me, and I needed to give it the
right look.  By now Angelus knows I'm here, and his actions are
pathetically easy to predict.  He'll run.  He's so besotted with
that little Slayer that he'll try to play the martyr, draw me
away from her."

"*So what?*"

"You're pathetic.  You spent all that time with Angelus and I,
and you still don't understand.  If you want to hurt someone,
you find out what they fear the most, and give it to them.  I
wanted to be sure of Angelus' fear; now that I am, I've sent
Beltarz to fetch him on his way out of town."

"And Beltarz is who?"

"My familiar demon," Rasitin whispered.

Spike turned away to escape those frightening, staring,
insane, *empty* eyes, and wondered, not for the first time,
how it was that Angel had managed to turn relatively normal
people into none-to-sane weapons.

*****

On the other side of Sunnydale, a man knelt over the crumpled
body of a little girl. Looking up he snarled in wordless rage.
I didn't care one way or the other about them, but I swear I
will find whoever did this, and deliver them to the cold embrace
of my Master.  The rain slashed against him as he stared into
nothing with hatred in his eyes.



______________________________________________________
Get Your Private, Free Email at http://www.hotmail.com



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Love's Revival (16/?)
Date: 13 Jun 1998 22:58:49 EDT

Title: Love's Revival (16/?)
Author: Michelle
Email Addy: [e-mail]
Rating: PG
Spoiler: Nothing really...just a few spoiler hints...
Feedback: PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE!!!
Distribution: Ask first, please.
Disclaimer: Savarah is mine! Buffy and the gang belong to Joss
Whedon, the WB, etc. The Story and the characters not part of the
regular cast are mine!
Sumary:  Buffy + Angel. Need I say more?
IMPORTANT: Sequal to The Dark One Series. This story is explained
as best as I could to fill in the blanks but you have to read
"The Dark One" to understand it. You can check it out as well as all
my other stories at: http://members.aol.com/aglx/fanfic.html

Sorry for the delay with this...let's just say I've been seriously busy.
***************

       *She's right. I can't save her. I can't protect her
any more now than I ever could.  Buffy is the slayer, not me;
but I just can't stand around and do nothing. I love her.*
        Xander walked slowly through the halls of the hospital.
Not sure where to go, he just walked, avoiding reaching a
destination.
        "Watch it, sir!" A nurse cried out as she ran into Xander.
        "Oh, sorry." The words were almost silent. He was too
caught up in his own thoughts about Buffy, about everything, to
notice what he was doing.  Walking steadily through the middle
of the hallway, Xander was an obstacle for everyone who walked by.
        "Excuse me?" A doctor asked as he saw Xander walking in
a daze.
        "Huh?" Xander stopped a few steps away from walking into
a wall.
        "Are you okay?"
        "Uh, yeah. I'm just...uh, walking."
        "I noticed that. Walking into a wall is more like it.
Can I help you find something?"
        "Oh no. My friend is here...in the hospital. I'm just...
here." The words didn't make much sense to him, but he didn't
know what he was doing so he couldn't explain it to the doctor.
        "Okay, well, you might want to be a bit more conscious of
where you are going. You're near the psyche ward here and if
you're not careful, someone may mistake you for a patient." The
doctor smiled, hoping Xander would too.
        "Oh. Didn't think about that. Thanks."  Xander just turned
and walked away.  Maybe he would get lucky and someone
would emit him.  Time in a padded room might be beneficial to
his life.  He was so preoccupied with his feelings for Buffy that he
paid no attention to everything he had.   Pretty soon, that
distraction was going to cost him more than he could afford to
loose.
        Cordelia was great but he was always to busy looking at
who she wasn't to realize who she was.  *Why does she even stick
by me?  Sure, she's not the kindest and most sincere person in the
world, but she actually likes me. She sees something in me that
few people actually see.  Awe, hell, that probably makes her even
crazier than I am.*
        Xander stood outside the door to Buffy's room. Angel was sitting
in a corner, waiting for the sun to go down so he could leave.
*Why is this so difficult? Buffy has Angel, I have Cordelia, why
can't I get that through my thick skull?!?' Xander argued with
himself. 'I've got to let her go. She's my best friend and
nothing more. I've got to let her go!*
        "Xander?"
        "Yeah?" Xander turned to see Giles--who hadn't slept in
days--standing behind him.  "Giles, don't take this the wrong way
but you look terrible. Go home and get some rest!"
        "Oh, I guess I should. I just want to make sure that Buffy
will be okay."
        "Giles she'll be fine. She's out of the woods now. Let her
recuperate. She'll need you to be strong and preferably awake when
she's feeling better." Hearing the words come out of his own mouth
almost scared him. Buffy is going to be okay. She has Angel now,
for good. As much as the thought of Angel and Buffy made him sick,
it was comforting to know that Angel would always protect Buffy
and now, was no longer a threat to her life.  Just her heart.
        "Yes, I suppose you're right. Will you be staying?"
        "Yeah. I've got no where else to be." Xander stepped away
from the door to let a nurse go in.
        "Home?"
        "Parents are out of town. I'd rather stay here and keep an
eye on Buff. Don't worry. Go home, get sleep, come back and then
be the watcher."
        "Okay." Giles forced a smile as he noticed how tired Xander
looked himself.  "Goodnight."
        "Goodnight."

*****
End Part 16. What do you think?? I'll try to have parts 17 - 20 out tonight
too! ( :



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Love's Revival (15/?)
Date: 13 Jun 1998 22:56:13 EDT

Title: Love's Revival (15/?)
Author: Michelle
Email Addy: [e-mail]
Rating: PG
Spoiler: Nothing really...just a few spoiler hints...
Feedback: PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE!!!
Distribution: Ask first, please.
Disclaimer: Savarah is mine! Buffy and the gang belong to Joss
Whedon, the WB, etc. The Story and the characters not part of the
regular cast are mine!
Sumary:  Buffy + Angel. Need I say more?
IMPORTANT: Sequal to The Dark One Series. This story is explained as
best as I could to fill in the blanks but you have to read "The Dark One" to
understand it. You can check it out as well as all my other stories at:
http://members.aol.com/aglx/fanfic.html

Sorry for the delay with this...let's just say I've been seriously busy.
16 will be out in just a minute.
***************

Part 15

       "I just don't get it. After all he's done to her, how can she just
take him back?" Cordelia asked as she grabbed a cup of coffee.
        "Isn't it obvious? It's that Savarah. I bet she brainwashed
her or something. Either that or Buffy's gone insane." Xander had a
tray of hospital food that he was pushing down the counter towards
the cashier.
        "Xander! She's been through a lot. Don't you think she
deserves the slightest bit of support on your part?" Willow said,
finally breaking into the argument. "I mean, he makes me nervous
too, but if Giles thinks it's alright..."
        "Hey, I'm supportive guy; I just don't agree with her reasons.
She brought the devil back to life to save the guy who broke her
heart and her soul."
        "He's also the only guy she ever loved." Willow said,
quietly.
        "Xander, I agree with you about Angel, but you've got to lay off
of Buffy.  She's got a hell of a lot on her shoulders and she doesn't
need your overprotective, criticizing self to make this any more
difficult than it already is!" Cordelia couldn't control herself. She
had no choice, he had to be stopped. If he wanted to criticize Angel,
fine; but Buffy wasn't at fault. She knew it would hit Xander hard, but
he had to realize that Buffy loved Angel and his chances with her no
longer existed.
        It was all so painful. Why did she love a guy who was head over
heals in love with another woman who didn't love him back? Sure,
he cared about her, but it wasn't the same.  Buffy was always
first on his list.
        Xander froze, unable to move or speak. He just looked at
her, hoping she would take that back.  After several minutes of
holding up the line, they made their way to a table in the
cafeteria.  They all sat down, eyeing each other carefully to see
who would make the first move to break the silence.
        "And I thought our school food was bad," Xander finally
said as he poked at his plate.
        "I never thought I'd say this but, I actually miss our
school lunch," Willow said. She pushed her tray away from herself.
Cordelia hadn't even bothered to get anything; she'd just grabbed a
cup of coffee.
        'Look at him, he's so hurt. Why'd I have to sound so
mean?' Cordelia watched Xander from across the table, hoping his
sad face would change. ' Because I had no choice; he was out of
control.  Buffy didn't need him to keep opposing her in her trials with
Angel. Just what she needed, the two guys who loved her, fighting
against her. Maybe it will end now, now that Angel is back. Maybe
it won't.'
        The sound of Xander's chair screeching across the floor
interrupted Cordelia's thoughts. "I'm not hungry enough to eat this. I'm
gonna head back and check on Buffy."
        "Xander, you can't. Angel's there with her. Let them have some
time alone," Willow said, glaring at him.
        "I don't think so. Every time those two are alone, they get
themselves into some sort of trouble." Xander started to turn and
walk away but Willow stopped him.
        "What? And you're going to save them this time? Dammit
Xander, give it up!  Buffy will be okay without you. You can't
always be there to catch her when she falls!" Willow now forced
herself to her feet to keep at his eye level.
        "I've got to do something." He turned and walked away.
Cordelia kept her mouth shut, afraid of the reaction it may get
her.
        She just stood there, waiting for him to come back and
apologize. Waiting so she could apologize.

*****
End Part 15 -- The more feedback...the more stories! ( :



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Love's Revival (15/?)
Date: 13 Jun 1998 22:56:13 EDT

Title: Love's Revival (15/?)
Author: Michelle
Email Addy: [e-mail]
Rating: PG
Spoiler: Nothing really...just a few spoiler hints...
Feedback: PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE!!!
Distribution: Ask first, please.
Disclaimer: Savarah is mine! Buffy and the gang belong to Joss
Whedon, the WB, etc. The Story and the characters not part of the
regular cast are mine!
Sumary:  Buffy + Angel. Need I say more?
IMPORTANT: Sequal to The Dark One Series. This story is explained as
best as I could to fill in the blanks but you have to read "The Dark One" to
understand it. You can check it out as well as all my other stories at:
http://members.aol.com/aglx/fanfic.html

Sorry for the delay with this...let's just say I've been seriously busy.
16 will be out in just a minute.
***************

Part 15

       "I just don't get it. After all he's done to her, how can she just
take him back?" Cordelia asked as she grabbed a cup of coffee.
        "Isn't it obvious? It's that Savarah. I bet she brainwashed
her or something. Either that or Buffy's gone insane." Xander had a
tray of hospital food that he was pushing down the counter towards
the cashier.
        "Xander! She's been through a lot. Don't you think she
deserves the slightest bit of support on your part?" Willow said,
finally breaking into the argument. "I mean, he makes me nervous
too, but if Giles thinks it's alright..."
        "Hey, I'm supportive guy; I just don't agree with her reasons.
She brought the devil back to life to save the guy who broke her
heart and her soul."
        "He's also the only guy she ever loved." Willow said,
quietly.
        "Xander, I agree with you about Angel, but you've got to lay off
of Buffy.  She's got a hell of a lot on her shoulders and she doesn't
need your overprotective, criticizing self to make this any more
difficult than it already is!" Cordelia couldn't control herself. She
had no choice, he had to be stopped. If he wanted to criticize Angel,
fine; but Buffy wasn't at fault. She knew it would hit Xander hard, but
he had to realize that Buffy loved Angel and his chances with her no
longer existed.
        It was all so painful. Why did she love a guy who was head over
heals in love with another woman who didn't love him back? Sure,
he cared about her, but it wasn't the same.  Buffy was always
first on his list.
        Xander froze, unable to move or speak. He just looked at
her, hoping she would take that back.  After several minutes of
holding up the line, they made their way to a table in the
cafeteria.  They all sat down, eyeing each other carefully to see
who would make the first move to break the silence.
        "And I thought our school food was bad," Xander finally
said as he poked at his plate.
        "I never thought I'd say this but, I actually miss our
school lunch," Willow said. She pushed her tray away from herself.
Cordelia hadn't even bothered to get anything; she'd just grabbed a
cup of coffee.
        'Look at him, he's so hurt. Why'd I have to sound so
mean?' Cordelia watched Xander from across the table, hoping his
sad face would change. ' Because I had no choice; he was out of
control.  Buffy didn't need him to keep opposing her in her trials with
Angel. Just what she needed, the two guys who loved her, fighting
against her. Maybe it will end now, now that Angel is back. Maybe
it won't.'
        The sound of Xander's chair screeching across the floor
interrupted Cordelia's thoughts. "I'm not hungry enough to eat this. I'm
gonna head back and check on Buffy."
        "Xander, you can't. Angel's there with her. Let them have some
time alone," Willow said, glaring at him.
        "I don't think so. Every time those two are alone, they get
themselves into some sort of trouble." Xander started to turn and
walk away but Willow stopped him.
        "What? And you're going to save them this time? Dammit
Xander, give it up!  Buffy will be okay without you. You can't
always be there to catch her when she falls!" Willow now forced
herself to her feet to keep at his eye level.
        "I've got to do something." He turned and walked away.
Cordelia kept her mouth shut, afraid of the reaction it may get
her.
        She just stood there, waiting for him to come back and
apologize. Waiting so she could apologize.

*****
End Part 15 -- The more feedback...the more stories! ( :



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Love's Revival (15/?)
Date: 13 Jun 1998 22:56:13 EDT

Title: Love's Revival (15/?)
Author: Michelle
Email Addy: [e-mail]
Rating: PG
Spoiler: Nothing really...just a few spoiler hints...
Feedback: PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE!!!
Distribution: Ask first, please.
Disclaimer: Savarah is mine! Buffy and the gang belong to Joss
Whedon, the WB, etc. The Story and the characters not part of the
regular cast are mine!
Sumary:  Buffy + Angel. Need I say more?
IMPORTANT: Sequal to The Dark One Series. This story is explained as
best as I could to fill in the blanks but you have to read "The Dark One" to
understand it. You can check it out as well as all my other stories at:
http://members.aol.com/aglx/fanfic.html

Sorry for the delay with this...let's just say I've been seriously busy.
16 will be out in just a minute.
***************

Part 15

       "I just don't get it. After all he's done to her, how can she just
take him back?" Cordelia asked as she grabbed a cup of coffee.
        "Isn't it obvious? It's that Savarah. I bet she brainwashed
her or something. Either that or Buffy's gone insane." Xander had a
tray of hospital food that he was pushing down the counter towards
the cashier.
        "Xander! She's been through a lot. Don't you think she
deserves the slightest bit of support on your part?" Willow said,
finally breaking into the argument. "I mean, he makes me nervous
too, but if Giles thinks it's alright..."
        "Hey, I'm supportive guy; I just don't agree with her reasons.
She brought the devil back to life to save the guy who broke her
heart and her soul."
        "He's also the only guy she ever loved." Willow said,
quietly.
        "Xander, I agree with you about Angel, but you've got to lay off
of Buffy.  She's got a hell of a lot on her shoulders and she doesn't
need your overprotective, criticizing self to make this any more
difficult than it already is!" Cordelia couldn't control herself. She
had no choice, he had to be stopped. If he wanted to criticize Angel,
fine; but Buffy wasn't at fault. She knew it would hit Xander hard, but
he had to realize that Buffy loved Angel and his chances with her no
longer existed.
        It was all so painful. Why did she love a guy who was head over
heals in love with another woman who didn't love him back? Sure,
he cared about her, but it wasn't the same.  Buffy was always
first on his list.
        Xander froze, unable to move or speak. He just looked at
her, hoping she would take that back.  After several minutes of
holding up the line, they made their way to a table in the
cafeteria.  They all sat down, eyeing each other carefully to see
who would make the first move to break the silence.
        "And I thought our school food was bad," Xander finally
said as he poked at his plate.
        "I never thought I'd say this but, I actually miss our
school lunch," Willow said. She pushed her tray away from herself.
Cordelia hadn't even bothered to get anything; she'd just grabbed a
cup of coffee.
        'Look at him, he's so hurt. Why'd I have to sound so
mean?' Cordelia watched Xander from across the table, hoping his
sad face would change. ' Because I had no choice; he was out of
control.  Buffy didn't need him to keep opposing her in her trials with
Angel. Just what she needed, the two guys who loved her, fighting
against her. Maybe it will end now, now that Angel is back. Maybe
it won't.'
        The sound of Xander's chair screeching across the floor
interrupted Cordelia's thoughts. "I'm not hungry enough to eat this. I'm
gonna head back and check on Buffy."
        "Xander, you can't. Angel's there with her. Let them have some
time alone," Willow said, glaring at him.
        "I don't think so. Every time those two are alone, they get
themselves into some sort of trouble." Xander started to turn and
walk away but Willow stopped him.
        "What? And you're going to save them this time? Dammit
Xander, give it up!  Buffy will be okay without you. You can't
always be there to catch her when she falls!" Willow now forced
herself to her feet to keep at his eye level.
        "I've got to do something." He turned and walked away.
Cordelia kept her mouth shut, afraid of the reaction it may get
her.
        She just stood there, waiting for him to come back and
apologize. Waiting so she could apologize.

*****
End Part 15 -- The more feedback...the more stories! ( :



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "Aurelia Destiny" <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Cloaked in Darkness:  Chapter 8/?
Date: 13 Jun 1998 21:54:09 PDT

HI everyone!  I'm looking for any Buffy Fanfiction to put on my new
Webpage, at the URL inclueded at the bottom of the page.  Send me some
guys!

Love,
Aurelia

*********************************************************************

TITLE: Cloaked In Darkness
AUTHOR: Princess Destiny ([e-mail])
SUMMARY: Things are not exactly what they seem when Giles finds an
ancient diary, with news of the death of the Slayer.  A new girl comes
to Sunnydale and things start to go crazy, Angel is jealous because
Buffy has a boyfriend and the Anointed one gets a nasty surprise...
It is naturally a Buffy/Angel Romance story, cause I'm a hopeless
romantic!
RATING: PG.
TIME PERIOD: Hmm, well since we have only seen up till Prophesy Girl
here in AustraliaBut I HAVE read the scripts for the rest of
them...Okay, just after Prophesy Girl and we'll leave it at that!
THANK-YOUS:
FEEDBACK: PLEASE!  I love to hear from people!
DISTRIBUTION: Ask me first, I'll say yes anyway, but I want to know
where it is going.
DISCLAIMER: Buffy, Angel and the others are the property of Joss Whedon.
Gabriella and any others I add later on are Mine, Mine, Mine!  This is
my first try at a Buffy fic so don't be too harsh, comments and
suggestions or even praise for my lovely story are very welcome!


               ************************
                CLOAKED IN DARKNESS
                  ************************


                 ***PART 3: SECRETS***


                Chapter 8:  Deadly Scheming


"Hey Buffster!  What's happening?"  Xander's cheerful voice penetrated
Buffy's daze and made her wince.  She turned to face her two best
friends and their expectant expressions with slight apprehension.  Buffy
had seen Willow dancing with Angel the night before and it had made her
jealous...of WILLOW!  She never would have figured herself for the
jealous type, but here she was jealous of Willow AND that girl Gabriella
that Angel liked so much.  AND Gabriella might be Angel's girlfriend
too, he had not denied it.

"Hi guys, everything's cool.  Have you seen Giles around today?  He
wasn't in the Library when I wen there earlier."  Buffy asked with a
smile, while taking her Math book from her locker and then locking it
again.  Willow and Xander exchanged a look, Buffy knew when someone was
keeping something from her...and they were.

"Okay, spit it out, what do you know?"  Buffy demanded and Xander choked
on his chocolate bar.  Willow pounded him frantically on the back,
clearly trying to stall.

"Uh, know?  We know nothing, nothing at all"  Xander gasped and Willow
nodded quickly, giving her friend a sidelong look that said to keep
talking.

"Yep.  Nothing." The red-haired girl confirmed, her eyes swinging around
the locker area as if for inspiration.

"So, Uh, Buffy.  What're you doing tonight?"  Xander asked
conversationally, he put an arm around Buffy and led her away from the
lockers.  Buffy let him only because Willow had stayed behind.  As soon
as they were around the corner Buffy slipped closer to Xander and
fluttered her lashes, smiling sweetly.

"Oh Xander, do me a favor?"  Buffy said on a sugary tone and Xander
flushed, gasping like a fish for the moment at her unusual behavior.
Buffy knew he had a crush on her and usually avoided close contact.

"Sure Buff"  he stammered and her expression hardened, she grabbed his
arm and pinned it behind his back while still smiling sweetly.

"tell me what's going on.  I KNOW there's something going on...Slayer
sense and all"  she said with a shrug but just then Willow came back and
Xander shook himself free with relief.  He rushed behind Willow and
mock-cowered, using her as a shield.


"Willow!  Buffy's trying to make me tell, stop her!"  Xander pointed to
the Slayer dramatically and Buffy grinned despite herself.  The day
might not turn out to be so bad, she thought with relief.  Just then she
spotted a tall graceful figure with incredibly long black hair and Buffy
bit her lip angrily.

"Hey Buff, you're simmering"  Xander noted and Buffy ignored him, her
eyes glued to the girl making her way through the halls at Cordelia's
side.  They were heading for the front entrance and Buffy started after
them without a word of goodbye to her friends.

"She's spacier than usual"  Willow noted back and Xander nodded.  They
had no idea what Buffy was up to, but they were going to find out.  Each
simultaneously started after their blonde friend and then laughed as
they saw they both had the same idea.

************************************

"...And this is the front office, you'll need to sign up here..."
Cordelia was saying as Buffy strode up behind them, Cordelia noticed her
first and both girls turned to look at Buffy.

"Buffy, aren't you supposed to be with the loser squad about now?"
Cordelia said smoothly and Buffy glared, not in the mood.  Instead she
turned to Cordelia's new friend and the glare intensified.

"What are you doing here may I ask?"  Buffy almost purred, Gabriella
looked startled and Cordelia patiently incredulous.

"Buffy, surely it's obvious what we're doing, Duh"  Cordelia snapped,
taking the other girl's arm and they both entered the front office with
a steaming Buffy behind.  She watched through the glass as Gabriella
talked to the woman behind the counter and saw that Gabriella had been
told the school was full.  She would have had very little chance getting
into Sunnydale High this far into the year and Buffy felt an irrational
satisfaction.  She didn't even see her two friend's sneak down the hall
and dash behind a wall.

"This is not a good thing, Buffy's glued to the front office"  Xander
whispered as he and Willow peered around the corner.  The blonde leader
of the Slayerettes was acting far more weird than usual, and that was
saying a lot about Buffy.

Buffy expected Gabriella to leave once she found out she couldn't get
in, but then something strange seemed to happen.  The woman got a blank
look in her eyes after meeting Gabriella's gaze and then she handed over
a few forms for the dark-haired beauty to fill out.  Buffy felt a jolt
like electricity go through her body and she shivered as if someone had
walked over her grave. Minutes later Gabriella was a student at
Sunnydale High and  Buffy was flabbergasted.

"No.  Way."  She said slowly, each word spitting from her mouth like a
bullet.  Gabriella had somehow gotten into the School with just a few
word and now Buffy had to contend with being near her rival every
day...she didn't even see as Cordelia and Gabriella left the front
office and the woman was staring out at Buffy as if she were mad.  Buffy
was staring at nothing however, her Slayer senses having gone off the
scale the moment Gabriella met the woman's eyes...

**********************************************

Buffy couldn't wait till lunch to see where Giles had been and she raced
to the Library.  Giles looked up startled as Buffy stormed in and dumped
her bag on the desk before the Watcher.

"Buffy.  I'm glad you're here..."  Giles began and Buffy glared.

"Really?  Let me guess, someone wants to take over the world...Brain
perhaps?"  she shouted and the Watcher frowned in confusion as Buffy
raved on incoherently and stomped away.

"Is there something bothering you?"  Giles asked gently and Buffy
stopped her tirade, calming at a remarkable speed.  She came back to the
desk and flung herself into a chair, leaning her chin against her hand
pensively.

"You could say that, Giles.  What if I said that there was a new girl
and she gave me REAL weird vibes?" Buffy asked and Giles took his
glasses off to wipe them, something she noticed he did a lot when
worried.

"R-really, she makes you worried?"  Giles said and Buffy rolled her
eyes.

"That's an understatement, as usual.  I'd say it's definitely a problem,
as in my Slay-O-Meter going off the scale?"  Buffy hinted and Giles
reached immediately for his books.  He was silent for a while, then with
a nervous expression aimed in Buffy's direction, he pulled out a book
from under a pile of papers.  Buffy immediately felt something and Sat
up straighter, staring intently at the red leather cover.

"What's that Giles, a new Codex?"  Buffy asked, mystified as she reached
for it and Giles pulled it back out of her reach almost protectively.
Buffy frowned in confusion and then pouted.

"Giles!  Come on, you never let me handle any of the books!"  Buffy
almost wailed.  It took another five minutes of pouting and wailing but
Giles eventually handed over the book just as Willow and Xander entered
the Library.

"So any new disasters abroad G-man?"  Xander said good-naturedly.  Giles
frowned, replying automatically as he kept an eye on Buffy.  The blonde
seemed fascinated by the book, though he knew she couldn't read it, she
was looking at the back page as if she could and Giles panicked.

"Buffy!  Be careful, it is very old!"  he shouted, snatching it out of
her hands and they all stared at him in surprise.

"I was careful!"  Buffy protested.  She got to her feet and walked
towards the weapon's cupboard.

"Buffy, I haven't put the 'closed for filing' sign up yet.  Anyone could
just walk...in"  he finished weakly as the doors pushed inward and
someone he had never seen in the school walked in.  She was amazingly
beautiful and Giles found himself gaping for a moment before remembering
he was supposed to be the Librarian.

"Can, can I help you?"  he stammered and she turned from a shelf to give
him a sweet smile that melted his limbs, she was wearing a white dress
that fell to her knee's and white knee boots.  Her hair was incredibly
long and dark and fell past her waist like a silken waterfall.

"I was just interested, I joined Sunnydale today and I always love to
read"  she told him quietly, her gaze was steady and there seemed to be
an infinite wisdom in her dark green eyes.  Giles felt drawn to her
immediately and barely heard the clatter of the quarter-staves as Buffy
brought them out of the weapon's cage.

"Ready for a thrashing Giles?"  she asked cheerfully.  Giles turned to
look at the Slayer in slight horror at the same time Buffy realized they
weren't alone.  Giles expected Buffy to say some story about what she
was doing with the staves but instead she was glaring with almost hatred
at the girl behind the Watcher's shoulder.

"I am sorry, I didn't know you were doing something private"  the girl
said quietly and Buffy leaned the staffs against the table, walking
closer.

"Oh, no.  We were just practicing...vampires you know"  Buffy said and
Giles gasped in horror, Willow almost fell over and Xander just gaped.

"Giles, guys, this is Gabriella.  She's Angel's new girlfriend"  Buffy
introduced the girl and Giles felt rather than saw Gabriella flinch at
Buffy's bitter words.

*********************************************

Gabriella blinked a tear from her eye before the other's could see it,
her heart truly felt for Buffy and her anguish.  But she didn't know if
it was Angel's intention to pretend that she was his girlfriend or not.
If he wanted she was fully intending to help him out, he had to have
SOMETHING to use, Buffy had Dwayne and now Angel had Gabriella to help
him.

"Gabriella has been around a few times when I've been fighting"  Buffy
murmured.  Gabriella moved towards the table and past the girl, almost
reaching out to give the blonde comfort.  But not.  Buffy would in no
way take help from a rival.

"I didn't mean to intrude...who are your friends Buffy?"  Gabriella
asked gently and the blonde seemed to shake herself out of a kind of
trace.  She introduced the two students as her best friends and Giles as
the Librarian.  If Gabriella found this odd she said nothing and Buffy
glared at her back as Angel's girl sat down at the table like she owned
the place.

"It IS the Library Buffy"  Giles muttered in Buffy's ear, clearly
recognizing the outraged look on the Slayer's face.  Gabriella saw the
look also and almost laughed, she talked with them for a while more and
then left.

******************************************
"...To see this Miss Calendar...it's amazing...can't translate..."
Giles voice echoed back from the halls as he and the computer teacher
walked towards the Library.  Miss calendar had seemed most interested at
the prospect of translating an unknown book.  They pushed open the doors
and walked in silently, Giles heard a slight noise and he and Miss
Calendar crept forward.  Buffy wasn't due today and neither were the
other two, school was also out so there should have been no one in the
Library at all.

"Be as quiet as you can, I'll see who is there"  Giles murmured and Miss
Calendar nodded and hide behind a book shelf near the door. Preparing to
fight if neccessary, as the Watcher inched around the counter till he
could see who was in the room.  He recognized the new girl Gabriella
immediately and almost straightened in relief, but something made his
paused and he looked closer.  He almost gasped when he saw she was
holding the precious book, the red leather covers were open and
Gabriella stroked the pages lightly.

After a moment he saw her lips move and then she began to read a loud.
But not in any language he could understand and he almost had a heart
attack when he realized she could understand and read what was written
in the pages.

"Impossible!"  Giles said more loudly than he had intended and
Gabriella's head shot up, he saw with shock that there were tears in her
green eyes and they shimmered like emeralds in the light.

"Oh"  she sniffed delicately and put the book down, still open.  Giles
moved around the counter until he was standing opposite Gabriella, the
table between them and he glanced down at the book curiously.  The pages
were open about half way through the book and he stared at the script
for a moment before glancing timidly up at her.  If she could truly read
it he wanted to know how and she could very well be the key to his
saving Buffy.

"Can you...?"  Giles started to say but Gabriella leapt to her feet with
a wary expression.  She ran swiftly and was out the door before Giles
could finish his sentence and he ran after her without thinking.

"Stop her!"  Giles yelled to Miss Calendar as Gabriella passed where she
was hiding but the teacher stood up with a confused expression.

"What?  Giles?"  she said, turning her head to watch the girl running
swiftly out the Library doors.

Giles felt an irrational anger and pushed past her, his eyes darting
around the school halls.  He looked left and then right, all the
classrooms were locked at night so she couldn't have gone into any of
them and the halls were long.  Gabriella had just disappeared into thin
air...

"I want to take you where the night never ends..."

*My quote for the month!*

************************************************************

My Labyrinth Webpage:

http://www.geocities.com/Hollywood/Studio/5443/LabyrinthPage.htm

My Sailor Moon Webpage:

http://www.geocities.com/Area51/Chamber/2588/PrincessDestiny.htm

My Buffy Webpage:

http://www.geocities.com/Hollywood/Studio/5443/BUFFY.htm

My Fanfiction Message Board:

http://www.insidetheweb.com/messageboard/mbs.cgi/mb65933


______________________________________________________
Get Your Private, Free Email at http://www.hotmail.com



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "Aurelia Destiny" <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Cloaked in Darkness:  Chapter 8/?
Date: 13 Jun 1998 21:54:09 PDT

HI everyone!  I'm looking for any Buffy Fanfiction to put on my new
Webpage, at the URL inclueded at the bottom of the page.  Send me some
guys!

Love,
Aurelia

*********************************************************************

TITLE: Cloaked In Darkness
AUTHOR: Princess Destiny ([e-mail])
SUMMARY: Things are not exactly what they seem when Giles finds an
ancient diary, with news of the death of the Slayer.  A new girl comes
to Sunnydale and things start to go crazy, Angel is jealous because
Buffy has a boyfriend and the Anointed one gets a nasty surprise...
It is naturally a Buffy/Angel Romance story, cause I'm a hopeless
romantic!
RATING: PG.
TIME PERIOD: Hmm, well since we have only seen up till Prophesy Girl
here in AustraliaBut I HAVE read the scripts for the rest of
them...Okay, just after Prophesy Girl and we'll leave it at that!
THANK-YOUS:
FEEDBACK: PLEASE!  I love to hear from people!
DISTRIBUTION: Ask me first, I'll say yes anyway, but I want to know
where it is going.
DISCLAIMER: Buffy, Angel and the others are the property of Joss Whedon.
Gabriella and any others I add later on are Mine, Mine, Mine!  This is
my first try at a Buffy fic so don't be too harsh, comments and
suggestions or even praise for my lovely story are very welcome!


               ************************
                CLOAKED IN DARKNESS
                  ************************


                 ***PART 3: SECRETS***


                Chapter 8:  Deadly Scheming


"Hey Buffster!  What's happening?"  Xander's cheerful voice penetrated
Buffy's daze and made her wince.  She turned to face her two best
friends and their expectant expressions with slight apprehension.  Buffy
had seen Willow dancing with Angel the night before and it had made her
jealous...of WILLOW!  She never would have figured herself for the
jealous type, but here she was jealous of Willow AND that girl Gabriella
that Angel liked so much.  AND Gabriella might be Angel's girlfriend
too, he had not denied it.

"Hi guys, everything's cool.  Have you seen Giles around today?  He
wasn't in the Library when I wen there earlier."  Buffy asked with a
smile, while taking her Math book from her locker and then locking it
again.  Willow and Xander exchanged a look, Buffy knew when someone was
keeping something from her...and they were.

"Okay, spit it out, what do you know?"  Buffy demanded and Xander choked
on his chocolate bar.  Willow pounded him frantically on the back,
clearly trying to stall.

"Uh, know?  We know nothing, nothing at all"  Xander gasped and Willow
nodded quickly, giving her friend a sidelong look that said to keep
talking.

"Yep.  Nothing." The red-haired girl confirmed, her eyes swinging around
the locker area as if for inspiration.

"So, Uh, Buffy.  What're you doing tonight?"  Xander asked
conversationally, he put an arm around Buffy and led her away from the
lockers.  Buffy let him only because Willow had stayed behind.  As soon
as they were around the corner Buffy slipped closer to Xander and
fluttered her lashes, smiling sweetly.

"Oh Xander, do me a favor?"  Buffy said on a sugary tone and Xander
flushed, gasping like a fish for the moment at her unusual behavior.
Buffy knew he had a crush on her and usually avoided close contact.

"Sure Buff"  he stammered and her expression hardened, she grabbed his
arm and pinned it behind his back while still smiling sweetly.

"tell me what's going on.  I KNOW there's something going on...Slayer
sense and all"  she said with a shrug but just then Willow came back and
Xander shook himself free with relief.  He rushed behind Willow and
mock-cowered, using her as a shield.


"Willow!  Buffy's trying to make me tell, stop her!"  Xander pointed to
the Slayer dramatically and Buffy grinned despite herself.  The day
might not turn out to be so bad, she thought with relief.  Just then she
spotted a tall graceful figure with incredibly long black hair and Buffy
bit her lip angrily.

"Hey Buff, you're simmering"  Xander noted and Buffy ignored him, her
eyes glued to the girl making her way through the halls at Cordelia's
side.  They were heading for the front entrance and Buffy started after
them without a word of goodbye to her friends.

"She's spacier than usual"  Willow noted back and Xander nodded.  They
had no idea what Buffy was up to, but they were going to find out.  Each
simultaneously started after their blonde friend and then laughed as
they saw they both had the same idea.

************************************

"...And this is the front office, you'll need to sign up here..."
Cordelia was saying as Buffy strode up behind them, Cordelia noticed her
first and both girls turned to look at Buffy.

"Buffy, aren't you supposed to be with the loser squad about now?"
Cordelia said smoothly and Buffy glared, not in the mood.  Instead she
turned to Cordelia's new friend and the glare intensified.

"What are you doing here may I ask?"  Buffy almost purred, Gabriella
looked startled and Cordelia patiently incredulous.

"Buffy, surely it's obvious what we're doing, Duh"  Cordelia snapped,
taking the other girl's arm and they both entered the front office with
a steaming Buffy behind.  She watched through the glass as Gabriella
talked to the woman behind the counter and saw that Gabriella had been
told the school was full.  She would have had very little chance getting
into Sunnydale High this far into the year and Buffy felt an irrational
satisfaction.  She didn't even see her two friend's sneak down the hall
and dash behind a wall.

"This is not a good thing, Buffy's glued to the front office"  Xander
whispered as he and Willow peered around the corner.  The blonde leader
of the Slayerettes was acting far more weird than usual, and that was
saying a lot about Buffy.

Buffy expected Gabriella to leave once she found out she couldn't get
in, but then something strange seemed to happen.  The woman got a blank
look in her eyes after meeting Gabriella's gaze and then she handed over
a few forms for the dark-haired beauty to fill out.  Buffy felt a jolt
like electricity go through her body and she shivered as if someone had
walked over her grave. Minutes later Gabriella was a student at
Sunnydale High and  Buffy was flabbergasted.

"No.  Way."  She said slowly, each word spitting from her mouth like a
bullet.  Gabriella had somehow gotten into the School with just a few
word and now Buffy had to contend with being near her rival every
day...she didn't even see as Cordelia and Gabriella left the front
office and the woman was staring out at Buffy as if she were mad.  Buffy
was staring at nothing however, her Slayer senses having gone off the
scale the moment Gabriella met the woman's eyes...

**********************************************

Buffy couldn't wait till lunch to see where Giles had been and she raced
to the Library.  Giles looked up startled as Buffy stormed in and dumped
her bag on the desk before the Watcher.

"Buffy.  I'm glad you're here..."  Giles began and Buffy glared.

"Really?  Let me guess, someone wants to take over the world...Brain
perhaps?"  she shouted and the Watcher frowned in confusion as Buffy
raved on incoherently and stomped away.

"Is there something bothering you?"  Giles asked gently and Buffy
stopped her tirade, calming at a remarkable speed.  She came back to the
desk and flung herself into a chair, leaning her chin against her hand
pensively.

"You could say that, Giles.  What if I said that there was a new girl
and she gave me REAL weird vibes?" Buffy asked and Giles took his
glasses off to wipe them, something she noticed he did a lot when
worried.

"R-really, she makes you worried?"  Giles said and Buffy rolled her
eyes.

"That's an understatement, as usual.  I'd say it's definitely a problem,
as in my Slay-O-Meter going off the scale?"  Buffy hinted and Giles
reached immediately for his books.  He was silent for a while, then with
a nervous expression aimed in Buffy's direction, he pulled out a book
from under a pile of papers.  Buffy immediately felt something and Sat
up straighter, staring intently at the red leather cover.

"What's that Giles, a new Codex?"  Buffy asked, mystified as she reached
for it and Giles pulled it back out of her reach almost protectively.
Buffy frowned in confusion and then pouted.

"Giles!  Come on, you never let me handle any of the books!"  Buffy
almost wailed.  It took another five minutes of pouting and wailing but
Giles eventually handed over the book just as Willow and Xander entered
the Library.

"So any new disasters abroad G-man?"  Xander said good-naturedly.  Giles
frowned, replying automatically as he kept an eye on Buffy.  The blonde
seemed fascinated by the book, though he knew she couldn't read it, she
was looking at the back page as if she could and Giles panicked.

"Buffy!  Be careful, it is very old!"  he shouted, snatching it out of
her hands and they all stared at him in surprise.

"I was careful!"  Buffy protested.  She got to her feet and walked
towards the weapon's cupboard.

"Buffy, I haven't put the 'closed for filing' sign up yet.  Anyone could
just walk...in"  he finished weakly as the doors pushed inward and
someone he had never seen in the school walked in.  She was amazingly
beautiful and Giles found himself gaping for a moment before remembering
he was supposed to be the Librarian.

"Can, can I help you?"  he stammered and she turned from a shelf to give
him a sweet smile that melted his limbs, she was wearing a white dress
that fell to her knee's and white knee boots.  Her hair was incredibly
long and dark and fell past her waist like a silken waterfall.

"I was just interested, I joined Sunnydale today and I always love to
read"  she told him quietly, her gaze was steady and there seemed to be
an infinite wisdom in her dark green eyes.  Giles felt drawn to her
immediately and barely heard the clatter of the quarter-staves as Buffy
brought them out of the weapon's cage.

"Ready for a thrashing Giles?"  she asked cheerfully.  Giles turned to
look at the Slayer in slight horror at the same time Buffy realized they
weren't alone.  Giles expected Buffy to say some story about what she
was doing with the staves but instead she was glaring with almost hatred
at the girl behind the Watcher's shoulder.

"I am sorry, I didn't know you were doing something private"  the girl
said quietly and Buffy leaned the staffs against the table, walking
closer.

"Oh, no.  We were just practicing...vampires you know"  Buffy said and
Giles gasped in horror, Willow almost fell over and Xander just gaped.

"Giles, guys, this is Gabriella.  She's Angel's new girlfriend"  Buffy
introduced the girl and Giles felt rather than saw Gabriella flinch at
Buffy's bitter words.

*********************************************

Gabriella blinked a tear from her eye before the other's could see it,
her heart truly felt for Buffy and her anguish.  But she didn't know if
it was Angel's intention to pretend that she was his girlfriend or not.
If he wanted she was fully intending to help him out, he had to have
SOMETHING to use, Buffy had Dwayne and now Angel had Gabriella to help
him.

"Gabriella has been around a few times when I've been fighting"  Buffy
murmured.  Gabriella moved towards the table and past the girl, almost
reaching out to give the blonde comfort.  But not.  Buffy would in no
way take help from a rival.

"I didn't mean to intrude...who are your friends Buffy?"  Gabriella
asked gently and the blonde seemed to shake herself out of a kind of
trace.  She introduced the two students as her best friends and Giles as
the Librarian.  If Gabriella found this odd she said nothing and Buffy
glared at her back as Angel's girl sat down at the table like she owned
the place.

"It IS the Library Buffy"  Giles muttered in Buffy's ear, clearly
recognizing the outraged look on the Slayer's face.  Gabriella saw the
look also and almost laughed, she talked with them for a while more and
then left.

******************************************
"...To see this Miss Calendar...it's amazing...can't translate..."
Giles voice echoed back from the halls as he and the computer teacher
walked towards the Library.  Miss calendar had seemed most interested at
the prospect of translating an unknown book.  They pushed open the doors
and walked in silently, Giles heard a slight noise and he and Miss
Calendar crept forward.  Buffy wasn't due today and neither were the
other two, school was also out so there should have been no one in the
Library at all.

"Be as quiet as you can, I'll see who is there"  Giles murmured and Miss
Calendar nodded and hide behind a book shelf near the door. Preparing to
fight if neccessary, as the Watcher inched around the counter till he
could see who was in the room.  He recognized the new girl Gabriella
immediately and almost straightened in relief, but something made his
paused and he looked closer.  He almost gasped when he saw she was
holding the precious book, the red leather covers were open and
Gabriella stroked the pages lightly.

After a moment he saw her lips move and then she began to read a loud.
But not in any language he could understand and he almost had a heart
attack when he realized she could understand and read what was written
in the pages.

"Impossible!"  Giles said more loudly than he had intended and
Gabriella's head shot up, he saw with shock that there were tears in her
green eyes and they shimmered like emeralds in the light.

"Oh"  she sniffed delicately and put the book down, still open.  Giles
moved around the counter until he was standing opposite Gabriella, the
table between them and he glanced down at the book curiously.  The pages
were open about half way through the book and he stared at the script
for a moment before glancing timidly up at her.  If she could truly read
it he wanted to know how and she could very well be the key to his
saving Buffy.

"Can you...?"  Giles started to say but Gabriella leapt to her feet with
a wary expression.  She ran swiftly and was out the door before Giles
could finish his sentence and he ran after her without thinking.

"Stop her!"  Giles yelled to Miss Calendar as Gabriella passed where she
was hiding but the teacher stood up with a confused expression.

"What?  Giles?"  she said, turning her head to watch the girl running
swiftly out the Library doors.

Giles felt an irrational anger and pushed past her, his eyes darting
around the school halls.  He looked left and then right, all the
classrooms were locked at night so she couldn't have gone into any of
them and the halls were long.  Gabriella had just disappeared into thin
air...

"I want to take you where the night never ends..."

*My quote for the month!*

************************************************************

My Labyrinth Webpage:

http://www.geocities.com/Hollywood/Studio/5443/LabyrinthPage.htm

My Sailor Moon Webpage:

http://www.geocities.com/Area51/Chamber/2588/PrincessDestiny.htm

My Buffy Webpage:

http://www.geocities.com/Hollywood/Studio/5443/BUFFY.htm

My Fanfiction Message Board:

http://www.insidetheweb.com/messageboard/mbs.cgi/mb65933


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From: "Aurelia Destiny" <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Cloaked in Darkness:  Chapter 8/?
Date: 13 Jun 1998 21:54:09 PDT

HI everyone!  I'm looking for any Buffy Fanfiction to put on my new
Webpage, at the URL inclueded at the bottom of the page.  Send me some
guys!

Love,
Aurelia

*********************************************************************

TITLE: Cloaked In Darkness
AUTHOR: Princess Destiny ([e-mail])
SUMMARY: Things are not exactly what they seem when Giles finds an
ancient diary, with news of the death of the Slayer.  A new girl comes
to Sunnydale and things start to go crazy, Angel is jealous because
Buffy has a boyfriend and the Anointed one gets a nasty surprise...
It is naturally a Buffy/Angel Romance story, cause I'm a hopeless
romantic!
RATING: PG.
TIME PERIOD: Hmm, well since we have only seen up till Prophesy Girl
here in AustraliaBut I HAVE read the scripts for the rest of
them...Okay, just after Prophesy Girl and we'll leave it at that!
THANK-YOUS:
FEEDBACK: PLEASE!  I love to hear from people!
DISTRIBUTION: Ask me first, I'll say yes anyway, but I want to know
where it is going.
DISCLAIMER: Buffy, Angel and the others are the property of Joss Whedon.
Gabriella and any others I add later on are Mine, Mine, Mine!  This is
my first try at a Buffy fic so don't be too harsh, comments and
suggestions or even praise for my lovely story are very welcome!


               ************************
                CLOAKED IN DARKNESS
                  ************************


                 ***PART 3: SECRETS***


                Chapter 8:  Deadly Scheming


"Hey Buffster!  What's happening?"  Xander's cheerful voice penetrated
Buffy's daze and made her wince.  She turned to face her two best
friends and their expectant expressions with slight apprehension.  Buffy
had seen Willow dancing with Angel the night before and it had made her
jealous...of WILLOW!  She never would have figured herself for the
jealous type, but here she was jealous of Willow AND that girl Gabriella
that Angel liked so much.  AND Gabriella might be Angel's girlfriend
too, he had not denied it.

"Hi guys, everything's cool.  Have you seen Giles around today?  He
wasn't in the Library when I wen there earlier."  Buffy asked with a
smile, while taking her Math book from her locker and then locking it
again.  Willow and Xander exchanged a look, Buffy knew when someone was
keeping something from her...and they were.

"Okay, spit it out, what do you know?"  Buffy demanded and Xander choked
on his chocolate bar.  Willow pounded him frantically on the back,
clearly trying to stall.

"Uh, know?  We know nothing, nothing at all"  Xander gasped and Willow
nodded quickly, giving her friend a sidelong look that said to keep
talking.

"Yep.  Nothing." The red-haired girl confirmed, her eyes swinging around
the locker area as if for inspiration.

"So, Uh, Buffy.  What're you doing tonight?"  Xander asked
conversationally, he put an arm around Buffy and led her away from the
lockers.  Buffy let him only because Willow had stayed behind.  As soon
as they were around the corner Buffy slipped closer to Xander and
fluttered her lashes, smiling sweetly.

"Oh Xander, do me a favor?"  Buffy said on a sugary tone and Xander
flushed, gasping like a fish for the moment at her unusual behavior.
Buffy knew he had a crush on her and usually avoided close contact.

"Sure Buff"  he stammered and her expression hardened, she grabbed his
arm and pinned it behind his back while still smiling sweetly.

"tell me what's going on.  I KNOW there's something going on...Slayer
sense and all"  she said with a shrug but just then Willow came back and
Xander shook himself free with relief.  He rushed behind Willow and
mock-cowered, using her as a shield.


"Willow!  Buffy's trying to make me tell, stop her!"  Xander pointed to
the Slayer dramatically and Buffy grinned despite herself.  The day
might not turn out to be so bad, she thought with relief.  Just then she
spotted a tall graceful figure with incredibly long black hair and Buffy
bit her lip angrily.

"Hey Buff, you're simmering"  Xander noted and Buffy ignored him, her
eyes glued to the girl making her way through the halls at Cordelia's
side.  They were heading for the front entrance and Buffy started after
them without a word of goodbye to her friends.

"She's spacier than usual"  Willow noted back and Xander nodded.  They
had no idea what Buffy was up to, but they were going to find out.  Each
simultaneously started after their blonde friend and then laughed as
they saw they both had the same idea.

************************************

"...And this is the front office, you'll need to sign up here..."
Cordelia was saying as Buffy strode up behind them, Cordelia noticed her
first and both girls turned to look at Buffy.

"Buffy, aren't you supposed to be with the loser squad about now?"
Cordelia said smoothly and Buffy glared, not in the mood.  Instead she
turned to Cordelia's new friend and the glare intensified.

"What are you doing here may I ask?"  Buffy almost purred, Gabriella
looked startled and Cordelia patiently incredulous.

"Buffy, surely it's obvious what we're doing, Duh"  Cordelia snapped,
taking the other girl's arm and they both entered the front office with
a steaming Buffy behind.  She watched through the glass as Gabriella
talked to the woman behind the counter and saw that Gabriella had been
told the school was full.  She would have had very little chance getting
into Sunnydale High this far into the year and Buffy felt an irrational
satisfaction.  She didn't even see her two friend's sneak down the hall
and dash behind a wall.

"This is not a good thing, Buffy's glued to the front office"  Xander
whispered as he and Willow peered around the corner.  The blonde leader
of the Slayerettes was acting far more weird than usual, and that was
saying a lot about Buffy.

Buffy expected Gabriella to leave once she found out she couldn't get
in, but then something strange seemed to happen.  The woman got a blank
look in her eyes after meeting Gabriella's gaze and then she handed over
a few forms for the dark-haired beauty to fill out.  Buffy felt a jolt
like electricity go through her body and she shivered as if someone had
walked over her grave. Minutes later Gabriella was a student at
Sunnydale High and  Buffy was flabbergasted.

"No.  Way."  She said slowly, each word spitting from her mouth like a
bullet.  Gabriella had somehow gotten into the School with just a few
word and now Buffy had to contend with being near her rival every
day...she didn't even see as Cordelia and Gabriella left the front
office and the woman was staring out at Buffy as if she were mad.  Buffy
was staring at nothing however, her Slayer senses having gone off the
scale the moment Gabriella met the woman's eyes...

**********************************************

Buffy couldn't wait till lunch to see where Giles had been and she raced
to the Library.  Giles looked up startled as Buffy stormed in and dumped
her bag on the desk before the Watcher.

"Buffy.  I'm glad you're here..."  Giles began and Buffy glared.

"Really?  Let me guess, someone wants to take over the world...Brain
perhaps?"  she shouted and the Watcher frowned in confusion as Buffy
raved on incoherently and stomped away.

"Is there something bothering you?"  Giles asked gently and Buffy
stopped her tirade, calming at a remarkable speed.  She came back to the
desk and flung herself into a chair, leaning her chin against her hand
pensively.

"You could say that, Giles.  What if I said that there was a new girl
and she gave me REAL weird vibes?" Buffy asked and Giles took his
glasses off to wipe them, something she noticed he did a lot when
worried.

"R-really, she makes you worried?"  Giles said and Buffy rolled her
eyes.

"That's an understatement, as usual.  I'd say it's definitely a problem,
as in my Slay-O-Meter going off the scale?"  Buffy hinted and Giles
reached immediately for his books.  He was silent for a while, then with
a nervous expression aimed in Buffy's direction, he pulled out a book
from under a pile of papers.  Buffy immediately felt something and Sat
up straighter, staring intently at the red leather cover.

"What's that Giles, a new Codex?"  Buffy asked, mystified as she reached
for it and Giles pulled it back out of her reach almost protectively.
Buffy frowned in confusion and then pouted.

"Giles!  Come on, you never let me handle any of the books!"  Buffy
almost wailed.  It took another five minutes of pouting and wailing but
Giles eventually handed over the book just as Willow and Xander entered
the Library.

"So any new disasters abroad G-man?"  Xander said good-naturedly.  Giles
frowned, replying automatically as he kept an eye on Buffy.  The blonde
seemed fascinated by the book, though he knew she couldn't read it, she
was looking at the back page as if she could and Giles panicked.

"Buffy!  Be careful, it is very old!"  he shouted, snatching it out of
her hands and they all stared at him in surprise.

"I was careful!"  Buffy protested.  She got to her feet and walked
towards the weapon's cupboard.

"Buffy, I haven't put the 'closed for filing' sign up yet.  Anyone could
just walk...in"  he finished weakly as the doors pushed inward and
someone he had never seen in the school walked in.  She was amazingly
beautiful and Giles found himself gaping for a moment before remembering
he was supposed to be the Librarian.

"Can, can I help you?"  he stammered and she turned from a shelf to give
him a sweet smile that melted his limbs, she was wearing a white dress
that fell to her knee's and white knee boots.  Her hair was incredibly
long and dark and fell past her waist like a silken waterfall.

"I was just interested, I joined Sunnydale today and I always love to
read"  she told him quietly, her gaze was steady and there seemed to be
an infinite wisdom in her dark green eyes.  Giles felt drawn to her
immediately and barely heard the clatter of the quarter-staves as Buffy
brought them out of the weapon's cage.

"Ready for a thrashing Giles?"  she asked cheerfully.  Giles turned to
look at the Slayer in slight horror at the same time Buffy realized they
weren't alone.  Giles expected Buffy to say some story about what she
was doing with the staves but instead she was glaring with almost hatred
at the girl behind the Watcher's shoulder.

"I am sorry, I didn't know you were doing something private"  the girl
said quietly and Buffy leaned the staffs against the table, walking
closer.

"Oh, no.  We were just practicing...vampires you know"  Buffy said and
Giles gasped in horror, Willow almost fell over and Xander just gaped.

"Giles, guys, this is Gabriella.  She's Angel's new girlfriend"  Buffy
introduced the girl and Giles felt rather than saw Gabriella flinch at
Buffy's bitter words.

*********************************************

Gabriella blinked a tear from her eye before the other's could see it,
her heart truly felt for Buffy and her anguish.  But she didn't know if
it was Angel's intention to pretend that she was his girlfriend or not.
If he wanted she was fully intending to help him out, he had to have
SOMETHING to use, Buffy had Dwayne and now Angel had Gabriella to help
him.

"Gabriella has been around a few times when I've been fighting"  Buffy
murmured.  Gabriella moved towards the table and past the girl, almost
reaching out to give the blonde comfort.  But not.  Buffy would in no
way take help from a rival.

"I didn't mean to intrude...who are your friends Buffy?"  Gabriella
asked gently and the blonde seemed to shake herself out of a kind of
trace.  She introduced the two students as her best friends and Giles as
the Librarian.  If Gabriella found this odd she said nothing and Buffy
glared at her back as Angel's girl sat down at the table like she owned
the place.

"It IS the Library Buffy"  Giles muttered in Buffy's ear, clearly
recognizing the outraged look on the Slayer's face.  Gabriella saw the
look also and almost laughed, she talked with them for a while more and
then left.

******************************************
"...To see this Miss Calendar...it's amazing...can't translate..."
Giles voice echoed back from the halls as he and the computer teacher
walked towards the Library.  Miss calendar had seemed most interested at
the prospect of translating an unknown book.  They pushed open the doors
and walked in silently, Giles heard a slight noise and he and Miss
Calendar crept forward.  Buffy wasn't due today and neither were the
other two, school was also out so there should have been no one in the
Library at all.

"Be as quiet as you can, I'll see who is there"  Giles murmured and Miss
Calendar nodded and hide behind a book shelf near the door. Preparing to
fight if neccessary, as the Watcher inched around the counter till he
could see who was in the room.  He recognized the new girl Gabriella
immediately and almost straightened in relief, but something made his
paused and he looked closer.  He almost gasped when he saw she was
holding the precious book, the red leather covers were open and
Gabriella stroked the pages lightly.

After a moment he saw her lips move and then she began to read a loud.
But not in any language he could understand and he almost had a heart
attack when he realized she could understand and read what was written
in the pages.

"Impossible!"  Giles said more loudly than he had intended and
Gabriella's head shot up, he saw with shock that there were tears in her
green eyes and they shimmered like emeralds in the light.

"Oh"  she sniffed delicately and put the book down, still open.  Giles
moved around the counter until he was standing opposite Gabriella, the
table between them and he glanced down at the book curiously.  The pages
were open about half way through the book and he stared at the script
for a moment before glancing timidly up at her.  If she could truly read
it he wanted to know how and she could very well be the key to his
saving Buffy.

"Can you...?"  Giles started to say but Gabriella leapt to her feet with
a wary expression.  She ran swiftly and was out the door before Giles
could finish his sentence and he ran after her without thinking.

"Stop her!"  Giles yelled to Miss Calendar as Gabriella passed where she
was hiding but the teacher stood up with a confused expression.

"What?  Giles?"  she said, turning her head to watch the girl running
swiftly out the Library doors.

Giles felt an irrational anger and pushed past her, his eyes darting
around the school halls.  He looked left and then right, all the
classrooms were locked at night so she couldn't have gone into any of
them and the halls were long.  Gabriella had just disappeared into thin
air...

"I want to take you where the night never ends..."

*My quote for the month!*

************************************************************

My Labyrinth Webpage:

http://www.geocities.com/Hollywood/Studio/5443/LabyrinthPage.htm

My Sailor Moon Webpage:

http://www.geocities.com/Area51/Chamber/2588/PrincessDestiny.htm

My Buffy Webpage:

http://www.geocities.com/Hollywood/Studio/5443/BUFFY.htm

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From: <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Love's Revival (14/?)
Date: 13 Jun 1998 22:53:00 EDT

Title: Love's Revival (14/?)
Author: Michelle
Email Addy: [e-mail]
Rating: PG-13 -- just to be safe for mild indications.
Spoiler: Nothing really...just a few spoiler hints...
Feedback: PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE!!!
Distribution: Ask first, please.
Disclaimer: Savarah is mine! Buffy and the gang belong to Joss
Whedon, the WB, etc. The Story and the characters not part of the
regular cast are mine!
Sumary:  Buffy + Angel. Need I say more?
IMPORTANT: Sequal to The Dark One Series. This story is explained as
best as I could to fill in the blanks but you have to read "The Dark One" to
understand it. You can check it out as well as all my other stories at:
http://members.aol.com/aglx/fanfic.html

Sorry for the delay with this...let's just say I've been seriously busy.
15 & 16 will be out in just a minute.
***************

Part 14

        He was sitting next to her, in the shadows, waiting patiently;
she had been sleeping for hours. The doctors had sedated her while
Giles had been persuading him to come.  Angel stared at the floor,
unable to bear the sight of  what he had done to her. <How? How could
I hurt something so beautiful?> He reached for her hand and clasped it
between his own. Her skin was soft, and the vampire closed his eyes
against a flood of memories.
        "Angel?" Buffy awoke at his gentle touch, opening her eyes
slowly to see him next to her.  Keeping his gaze turned to the floor, he
didn't respond. He had come because she wanted him there, but he
didn't deserve to speak to her. Not anymore; not ever.
         "Angel?" She wrapped her fingers around his, and he finally
looked up at her. She smiled when she saw his eyes. She knew
instantly that it was him.
        "I'm sorry- I'm so sorry Buffy. I'm sorry I couldn't help you."
Angel whispered as he pressed her hand against her face, struggling
to hold back his tears.
        "Shhh. You did help me. I wouldn't be alive if it wasn't for
you."
        "What do you mean? I nearly killed you, Buffy-"
        "You know that's not true.  You're not to blame for all this."
        "Buffy, look at yourself; look at what I did to you."
        "You didn't do anything to me, he did. He did it because Savarah
told him to. *You* didn't do it."
        "Maybe you can convince yourself that, but it's not going to
work for me."
        Buffy reached over and placed her other hand on top of Angel's.
"Listen, I choose to go after you. I choose to get my soul back. I could
have spent the rest of my life with you living in me." Angel smiled
wanly. "That's the smile I've been waiting to see."

*********
        "I don't like this. We're just leaving her in there with
him," Xander said. He still wasn't convinced by Angel's act.  After
seeing the pain he had caused Buffy and Giles, he wasn't going to be
quick to forgive.
        "Buffy will be just fine. He's not going to hurt her
anymore." Willow said, trying both to remain calm and to convince
herself.
        "You don't know that!" Xander jumped in.  Just because Buffy
wanted him back didn't mean that that bastard deserved her.
        Giles sighed, rubbing his temples. 'Maybe I should have let him
do it. Maybe Buffy would be better off if I just had let Angel stick
that branch through his heart.'
        "No," Giles said slowly, "I think she's right." His tone was
strangely accepting.
        Willow and Xander both looked at him for a second before
Xander finally said, "I still don't know about this."
        "Just relax. Buffy will be just fine."

*********

Buffy looked deep into his brown eyes.  "It was you, wasn't it?"
        "What was me?"
        "You told everyone I was dying. You gave me your soul so I
could live."
        "I would have do it again in a heartbeat- if I actually
had one."  Buffy laughed but then stopped. She had several broken
ribs and each breath she took sent shivers of pain down her spine.
        Angel tightened his grip on her hand as she struggled to
force the pain away.  "I'm so sorry Buffy, I know it's not enough, but-
I'm sorry." He felt her pain much more strongly than she did.
        "Stop saying that. I know it wasn't you who did this to me.
You were the one who helped me survive it. Now I need *you* to help
me get better; we have a few loose ends to tie up."
        "What?"
        "A certain creature from the hellmouth is still alive."
        "Oh. Don't worry about Savarah; I'm going to take care of her."
        "The hell you will.  I'm the one in the hospital bed here, and I
say: You are not taking her down without my help." Angel smiled at
her enthusiasm.  "Okay," Angel said as he stood up and kissed her
on the cheek. He stopped when her saw the confused look on her face.
"We've been through a lot in the past few months. Let's take it
slow." She smiled back at him as he left the room.

**********

        His lips ran up her arm and worked their way to her neck.
She let out a squeal as he gently bit her neck.
        "Just think. You and me, and no more Angel!"
        "You make it sound like a good thing," Dru said. A frown
formed itself on her face.
        Spike stopped and looked at her.  "Don't expect me to lie to
you and say that I liked him. That bastard tried to take you from me."
        "You were jealous?"
        "Of course I was my sweet."
        "Good." Dru sat up a bit and kissed his lips.
        Spike chose not to make an issue of it. "Whatever you say,
my sweet." Spike pushed her head back down on the pillow and kissed
her again.



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: [e-mail] (Ingrid E Stanton)
Subject: BUFFYFIC: "Reunion" (25/?) by Ingrid
Date: 12 Jun 1998 23:04:14 EDT

DISCLAIMER: The characters are not mine.
SUMMARY: The effects of BuffyÆs efforts are
realized.
FEEDBACK: Send.
REQUESTS FOR PARTS: IÆm happy to send
you whatever you need. ([e-mail])

NOTE:

*********
"Reunion," by Ingrid
Part Twenty-five: "Dawn"
*********

Buffy rubbed her eyes and sat up. It was light out. She
didnÆt know how long sheÆd slept- the last thing she
remembered was Willow and the dust. She sat up with her
teeth clenched. She should have stopped-

Or maybe she shouldnÆt have. Maybe WillowÆs "sacrifice"
hadnÆt been a sacrifice at all. Perhaps sheÆd wanted to end her
existence all along, and the spell had simply provided a
welcome opportunity.

BuffyÆs limbs protested as she stood, but she ignored the pain
and found her way out of the woods. Things were still a
little foggy, but she was anxious to get to CordeliaÆs house
to see what had happened.

She gazed at the expanses of the horizon. It must have been
close to noon, she reasoned, watching the sun blaze overhead.
Despite the warm sky, however, the chill Massachusetts air
was slowly freezing her, bit by bit. She shook it off, and
headed for Xander and CordeliaÆs house.

Just a few more steps down this way, over this hill and-

There was nothing where the house should have been. Nothing
but open fields of melting gray snow. She turned around and
around. Had she lost her way?

No. No, this was it.

This *had been* it.

Now it was a green field.

She should have expected it.

Where the hell was everybody?

She walked to the edge of the woods again, where a dark figure
was slowly rising from over the hill, coming closer gradually.

Her worries disappeared as she saw who it was.

Angel.

***
END, 25.
I know itÆs short, I know, butà finals!!

_____________________________________________________________________
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From: <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Love's Revival (17/?)
Date: 14 Jun 1998 13:37:09 EDT

Title: Love's Revival (17/?)
Author: Michelle
Email Addy: [e-mail]
Rating: PG
Spoiler: Nothing really...just a few spoiler hints...
Feedback: PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE!!!
Distribution: Ask first, please.
Disclaimer: Savarah is mine! Buffy and the gang belong to Joss
Whedon, the WB, etc. The Story and the characters not part of the
regular cast are mine!
Sumary:  Buffy + Angel. Need I say more?
IMPORTANT: Sequal to The Dark One Series. This story is explained
as best as I could to fill in the blanks but you have to read
"The Dark One" to understand it. You can check it out as well as all
my other stories at: http://members.aol.com/aglx/fanfic.html

*****
Part 17

       He walked over to the window and stared out at the
quiet night in Sunnydale. It looked so peaceful, so innocent-
but he knew better. The surface of Sunnydale was so deceiving.
Inside, there was a mass of demons and destruction. Uncontrollable
evil lurked about in the shadows of the night. Evil that only
she could stop. But now the slayer was in no condition to even
walk, let alone save the world from evil.
        The lights flickered on and Giles shielded his eyes from
the brightness they produced.  Days had passed since his eyes had
closed for more than thirty seconds.  So tired.  He lay down on
the couch which he had turned into a makeshift bed.  He refused to
go upstairs.  Maybe someday he could bring himself to go up there,
but it would take a lot of time to heal the wounds that Angelus
had caused.

~

        "Oh, I know, our ways are strange to you, but soon you will
join us in the 20th century.  With three whole years to spare!"  Her
soft image flooded through his mind. The first time they had met
he had known that there was something special about her, even though
he didn't like to let it show.
        "I never knew I was going to fall in love with you."
        Her body, laying awkwardly on the bed. That sight, that horrid
sight, destroyed everything.
        "I never knew I was going to fall in love with you...fall
in love with you...fall in love with you..."
        "I'm sorry I couldn't kill him for you. For her."
        "Sleep tight!" Angel's voice resounded in his mind, growing
louder every time. "Sleep tight!"

~

        He awoke with a start. Sweat beaded down his face as his
heart pumped faster and faster. He couldn't make it stop.  His head
pounded heavily, keeping time with his heart.  He lay there
in the darkness; unable to sleep, unable to think. Everything
had changed.  Whether it was for the better or worse would be up
to destiny.  He could lead the Slayer in the right direction, but
he couldn't change the way the world would be.  His life would
forever be changed.
        Jenny was gone and Angel was back.  The switch wasn't
something he wanted to accept.

END PART 17 - Feedback anyone?



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: Jeff Weitkamp <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: School Spirits.  Part 1
Date: 14 Jun 1998 14:05:21 -0700

Name:  School Spirits
Author: Jeff W
E-Mail: [e-mail]
Feedback: Yes please. Tell me anything. Was is good, bad, or what.
Distribution: Please ask and I'll say yes.
Summary: This story dosn't involve Buffy and Co. directly although they
do make apperances. The main character is Amy Madison from 'The Witch'
and 'Bewitched, Bothered, and Bewildered' which are both be aired this
week on WB. But don't worry my next story will have the regular crew.
Spoilers: The Witch.
Rating: PG
Time line: After Whe Witch. Sometime before Prophecy Girl.
Disclaimer: Most of the characters in this story belong to Joss Wheadon
ect. The only characters I can claim are Toni, Kyle and Marlene.


*********************************

School Spirits



Chapter 1

Friday 3:30 p.m.
  Amy sat cross-legged on the floor of her bedroom, staring at nothing.
She'd been sitting there for the last half-hour. Fifteen minutes ago she
made up her mind what she had to do. The last fifteen minutes she had
been trying to work up the courage to follow through.
  "Come on girl." Amy thought to herself as she stood up. "You know
you've got to do it."
  "See. It's not so hard." Thought Amy as she reached the door. "Don't
stop!" Amy said to herself as she reached the door, pulled it open, and
walked through it and into the hall. Soon she was down the stairs, and
into the kitchen.
  Suddenly the phone rang causing Amy to jump. "No distractions."
Thought Amy as she stood staring at the phone as it rang. "I do NOT need
any distractions now." After the forth ring Amy heard the answering
machine pick up in the other room.
  "This is the Madison residence. We can't come to the phone right now."
Amy heard her fathers recorded voice answer. "So if you would leave your
name, number and a short message we will call you back. Thanks."
  "Hi Amy? This is Marlene. Call me, OK?  Talk to you later."
Amy stood in the kitchen staring in the direction of the answering
machine. The whole thing somehow seemed wrong, Amy was thinking to
herself. But she couldn't put her finger on exactly what was wrong.
"It's just to, to=85"
  "Normal." Amy finished the thought out loud.=20
  "Now you're stalling again girlfriend." Amy told herself again with a
smile.
  "Let's get this over with." Amy said to the empty room as she turned
again toward the door to the basement. "You knew that you would have to
face this one day. This is as good of time as any."
  But, instead of heading for the basement door Amy turned to the right.
With two quick steps she reached the refrigerator and pulled open the
door. Looking inside Amy grabbed a bottle of the flavored drink of the
week. Very deliberately Amy twisted off the cap and took a long drink.
As soon as the fruity liquid hit her mouth Amy realized how dry her
mouth had become. At the same time she also realized that her palms were
very sweaty.
  After a moment Amy finished drinking and lowered the bottle from her
mouth. Screwing the cap back in place Amy looked again at the door to
the basement. As she did a quick shiver ran through her body.
  "Ahhhhhh!" Said Amy in a fit of frustration. She sat the bottle on the
table with a light thud, and said, "This is so lame."
  Setting a determined look on her face Amy crossed the kitchen and was
at the basement door. Quickly so as not to give herself time to think
she twisted the knob and pulled the door open.
  As the door came open Amy was given pause as a slight draft hit her in
the face.  The air had an ever so slight chill to it. But it was a chill
that felt like it penetrated to her bones. Amy found herself standing in
the basement door staring down at the stairs as they disappeared into
the darkness.
  Her sudden burst of courage gone, Amy slowly reached out with her
right hand and felt for the light switch, and flipped it on. The action
had immediate, but not the desired results. At the bottom of the stairs
one of the tubes in the overhead fluorescent light fixture was out
causing the other bulb to weakly flicker casting the area at the bottom
of the stairs into a scene of ghostly, dancing shadows.
  "Perfect." Said Amy. "Just perfect."
  Amy took a deep breath and reached out for the handrail. Finding it
she began to slowly descend the stairs. Despite her best efforts Amy
could not suppress a feeling of dread that continued to grow inside her
as she took each step into the near darkness.
  "It's been six months since Mom=85," Amy thought as she slowly passed
the halfway point on her descent. "Since Mom. Went away."  Images
flashed through Amy's mind as she recalled the near nightmare that had
started one morning when she woke up in her mother's bed. Not just her
bed, she was in her mother's body.
The memories flooded through her mind in a torrent that ended in a
flash. And when her eyes had adjusted from the flash all that had been
in the room were herself, and Buffy holding a mirror. And where her
mother had been standing. Nothing. Since that day there had been no sign
of her mother. Was she dead? Was she alive somewhere and plotting some
kind of awful revenge? No one knew.
  As she reached the bottom of the stairs and turned the light above her
head gave off a slight buzz and increased ever so slightly in
brightness. Then just as suddenly it dimmed returning the area into
shadows.
  Amy looked up the hall to the door that her goal lay behind. After a
moment she took a step in that direction. Amy felt like she was trying
to walk through molasses on a cold day. Each step seemed harder than the
one before. Like something was here holding her back. But what? Tension?
Fear? Or something else?   Amy didn't know what it was but there was
something.
  Amy thought "It's just my imagination." Then out loud she said, "There
is 'Nothing' here." In the enclosed area her voice sounded out of place,
and caught her off guard because she hadn't intended to speak out loud.
She looked around the dimly lit area to make sure it really was her who
had spoken.
  Nearing the door the feeling of dread continued to mount. As she
reached out for the door knob Amy couldn't help but think. "Maybe there
is something, or someone here. Maybe mom has come back and is ready to
take her revenge out on her." Taking the doorknob into her hand Amy
thought, "Well. I've come this far."   As she turned the knob, she could
hear a little voice in the back of her head screaming to run. Run for
her life. Run, and never come back.
  Ignoring the voice she slowly pushed the door open. It swung back with
a slight squeak. As it opened the light behind her brightened again just
for an instant.   Then returned to it's dim flicker. But the light was
bright enough to cast more shadows that came and went so fast all that
remained was an afterimage in her eyes.
  Amy pushed the door open far enough to allow what light there was
filtering into the room to fall onto the chest. The chest that held the
tools of he mothers trade. Her trade now. The tools of a witch.
  Swallowing hard Amy entered the room, telling herself, "There's
nothing to be afraid of. There is no one here besides me."  Just then
Amy jerked her head to the right. Did she hear something over there? For
what seemed like hours but in reality must have been just a hand full of
seconds Amy stood there straining, listening as hard as she had ever
listened in her life. Finally she decided there was nothing there and
took a deep breath. It wasn't till that moment she realized she had been
holding her breath.
  Despite the voice in her head screaming to get away from here, Amy
finally stepped into the room and up to the chest. It only took a moment
to remove the items that had been stacked on the chest during the last
few months. Amy reached into the pocket of her jeans and pulled out a
key. The key that she had kept with her these last months. Ever since
she and Willow had packed away her mother's things.
  Amy had to step to one side to allow enough light onto the lock so she
could use the key to unlock the case. It turned easily. And with a click
that sounded deafening she knew that the lock was open. Removing the key
from the lock Amy replaced the key in her pocket and slowly opened the
chest.
  When nothing jumped out of the at her, Amy felt the tension drain from
her body and said. "See. That wasn't so tough was it?
  "Why didn't I bring a flashlight?" Said Amy  as she knelt in front of
the chest. When  suddenly from her right she saw something leap at her.
As she fell backwards all she could do, was scream.


Chapter 2:
Wednesday 7:50 am. Two days earlier.

  "He's is a little cute, but all he want's to talk about is sports."
  Amy was listening to Marlene with only half an ear. She was talking
about her second favorite subject. Boys. Still Amy preferred this over
Marlene's favorite subject. Marlene herself. Marlene was one of Amy's
best friends. But sometimes it paid to tune her out. Sometimes Amy
secretly wondered if maybe Marlene preferred it that way. Less chance of
being interrupted.
  The pair stopped with other students at the last intersection before
reaching Sunnydale High, and waited for the light to change. As they
stood there Marlene suddenly and with practiced  ease changed subjects
and began to talk about a pair of shoes she wanted to buy.
  Amy let her mind wander. Something had been bothering her all morning.
She couldn't identify what it was. For that matter she couldn't really
describe the feeling. Something between apprehension, and depression. No
that wasn't right either.
  Amy sighed inwardly and tried to shake the feeling for the hundredth
time that morning. Still with no more success than the other ninety-nine
times.=20
Automatically Amy began to cross the street with the other students when
the light changed. Suddenly the feeling intensified. Amy felt the hair
stand up on the back of her neck as she focused on the feeling. Then she
knew what it was. She felt like she was being watched.
  Stopping where she stood Amy turned around quickly. She looked up the
street the way they had just come. Everything looked normal. Just like
you'd expect on a sunny spring morning. Then she looked  to each side
trying to locate someone, or something that was out of place. Anything
that would explain her mood. Nothing.
  Amy jumped when without warning a car horn sounded and brought her
back from her distraction. She was standing in the middle of the
street.  Amy looked at the car to her left that had sounded the horn. In
the drivers seat sat a lady. Probably on her way to work. The woman had
a slightly annoyed look on her face. After a moment the woman raised her
hand off the steering wheel and motioned to her. Politely indicated that
Amy might want to continue across the street.
  "Amy! Amy!!."
  Amy turned towards the sound of her name. Marlene stood on the
sidewalk with an expression that said, "Duh-uh." Amy wondered how long
she had been standing there calling her name.
  "Are we spacing today?" Marlene asked. "Don't just stand there. Get
out of the road. We've got to get to class. You know what a pain Mr.
Sanders can be when we're late."
  Amy quickly turned and ran the rest of the way to the sidewalk.
  "What's the matter with you?" Asked Marlene.
  "Huh." Said Amy as they began to walk up the stairs to the main
entrance to Sunnydale High. "Oh nothing. I just thought for a moment
that I may have left my history assignment at home."
  "Well call you Over Reaction Girl." Marlene said as they passed
through the doors. Then she began to talk about the sweater she wore
draped over her shoulders. And how naturally, the sweater was the
perfect match to her skirt.
  Amy blinked as her eyes adjusted from the bright sunshine as the
walked down the hall. Just before they turned the corner towards their
first class of the day, Amy could not resist the urge to glance back out
the doors they had just come through. As she half expected, she saw
nothing.
  Five feet from the door to Mr. Sander's English class the bell rang.
  "We're late. Again." Said Marlene. "Great!"
  If she wasn't sure before she was sure now. It was going to be a great
day.=20
  "Oh well." Amy rationalized. "It sure can't get any worse. Can it?"=20
She was wrong.


   The day just dragged on and on. And so did Amy's mysterious mood.
Always something out there just out of reach. Something she couldn't put
her finger on. Sometimes she would be walking down the hall or sitting
in class and the feeling would turn up a notch . Amy would look around
but she could see no one or no thing out of the ordinary. Then just as
quickly the feeling would pass.
  The whole thing was getting on Amy's nerves. She was even starting to=20
wonder if she was starting to see things. Like at lunch. Amy was sitting
outside with Marlene and Toni, who was the third member of their trio.
The other two girls just chatting away like any other day. All Amy could
do was sit there and pretend she had an appetite.
  All of a sudden Amy got that feeling like she was being watched again.
She looked around slowly. But she saw nothing. Then suddenly something
caught her attention. Something so minor that she had almost missed it.
Over near the school building sat a pair of large green trash dumpsters.
The kind that the garbage trucks would pull up to with some kind of huge
claw like thing hanging out of the front. Then like some kind of monster
this claw would grab the dumpster, lift it over the cab and dump the
contents into the back of the truck.
  Well sitting on top of one of the dumpsters was a cat. From where she
sat it seemed to just sit there. But what caught Amy's attention was the
fact that the cat seemed to be staring directly at her. "That's just
your imagination." Amy thought. "This whole morning has got you really
spooked."
  But as she watched the cat Amy became convinced that it was really
watching her. Finally she had enough. Amy was just about to stand up and
go investigate when two people passed between her and the cat
momentarily blocking her view.   Then when they had moved out of the way
of her view of the dumpsters the cat was gone. No sign at all. Or had it
really ever been there at all.


********=20
  End of Part 1



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: Jeff Weitkamp <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: School Spirits.   Part 2
Date: 14 Jun 1998 14:09:45 -0700

Name:  School Spirits
Author: Jeff W
E-Mail: [e-mail]
Feedback: Yes please. Tell me anything. Was is good, bad, or what.
Distribution: Please ask and I'll say yes.
Summary: This story dosn't involve Buffy and Co. directly although they
do make apperances. The main character is Amy Madison from 'The Witch'
and 'Bewitched, Bothered, and Bewildered' which are both being aired
this week on WB. But don't worry my next story will have the regular
crew.
Spoilers: The Witch.
Rating: PG
Time line: After Whe Witch. Sometime before Prophecy Girl.
Disclaimer: Most of the characters in this story belong to Joss Wheadon
ect. The only characters I can claim are Toni, Kyle and Marlene.


*********************************
School Spirits   Part 2


  After school Marlene's mom picked her up to go shopping. Of course.
Toni was staying late to take a test that she missed that morning
because of a doctors appointment. So Amy was walking home alone. Her
father would not be home for a couple more hours, so Amy decided she
felt like a walk to the park. Maybe with a change of scenery she could
sort out what was bothering her.
  Amy had just turned onto Oak street when she spotted a boy of about 13
walking on the other side of the street in the opposite direction. The
boy saw her at the same time and waved. "Hi Amy."
  Amy smiled and answered. "Hello Billy." Amy knew Billy Sims because
she used to baby-sit for him and his younger sister Cindy.
  Billy crossed the street to Amy and said. "What are you doing over
here Amy?.
  "Oh. Just out for a walk." She replied. "What about you Billy? Don't
you still live over on Third Street.
  Billy held up a dog leash in his hand and said. "I'm looking for
Sparkey. He got out again last night."
  Then Billy got a sheepish look on his face and looked at the ground
and said. "Aaa, Amy. Don't call me Billy. That's a little kids name.
Call me Bill."
  "Oh. I'm sorry Billy. I mean Bill."
  Billy turned a little red and smiled bashfully. "That's okay Amy. You
didn't know."
  "Bill. Yeah. I like Bill. it fits you."
  "So old Sparkey is still getting out is he?" Asked Amy.
  "You know it."
  The two walked down the street and talked. Just as they turned a
corner Amy suddenly stopped short letting out a gasp of surprise.
  "What's the matter Amy?" Asked Bill. "Amy?"
  All she could do was point. Sitting in the middle of the sidewalk five
feet in front of them was a cat. No she was sure of it. It was 'The'
cat. The same one that had been watching her during lunch. And here it
was again sitting there and watching her. No not it. Him. Somehow Amy
knew it was a him.
  The feline was almost entirely jet black. Except for the left ear and
part of his right rear foot which were white.
  Bill looked to where Amy pointed and said. "Ahh. It's just some old
cat. Your not superstitious  are you? You know what they say about black
cats crossing your path?"
  "No. This cat has been following me." Said Amy. Her eyes not leaving
the cat who continued to stare at her.
  Bill stood there with a look on his face that said he wasn't sure if
she was kidding or not. Then slowly the cat stood up and walked towards
them. Amy's reaction must be starting to spook Bill because when he saw
the cat walking in their direction he backed up a step.
  But the cat continued to walk towards Amy. It walked up to her feet
and stood there looking up at her. Looking like he was trying to make up
his mind. Then almost without warning the cat jumped up to where Amy
caught instinctively caught him in her arms.
  She just stood there with the cat in her arms staring down at him
while he stared up at her. Amy looked into the cat's eyes. They were
like beautiful  yellow orbs that seemed to draw her in deeper. It almost
seemed to wrap her up in a warm embrace.
  Amy wasn't sure how long she stood there staring at the cat. But
suddenly the cat looked away and started to purr. And even though she
couldn't explain why Amy was happy. Happier than she had been all day.
Maybe happier that she had felt in quite a while. Amy pulled the cat to
her cheek. Now not only did she hear the purring she could feel it
through her cheek. Amy blinked as she felt a tear in her eye. She smiled
as she realized that she had just found something she didn't even know
she was looking for.

  "So." Asked Bill. "Do you know who that cat belongs to?"
  Amy turned to Bill and without even thinking said. "He's mine, sort
of."
  "I didn't know you had a cat. When did you get it"
  "I not sure if I can explain this." Said Amy. "I'm not even sure if I
understand it myself." I didn't pick him. He picked me. And don't ask me
how I know that. I just do."
  The two started walking down the street again. Amy still cradling her
purring feline companion. They walked for a while in silence.
  After a few minutes Bill asked. "So what's his name?"
  "I don't know. I guess I should give him one."
  Bill looked at the cat and said. "Well he is almost all black. You
could call him Blackie. Or he has those patches of white. How about
Patches, or maybe even Spot. Yeah Spot."
  Amy felt the cat stop purring in her arms. When she stopped walking
and looked down at the cat he was staring back at her. Somehow she felt
that none of those suggestions would do. She stared at him for a moment
and said. "Jericho. His name is Jericho."=20
  "Jericho. What kind of a name is that for a cat?" Asked Bill. Where
did you come up with that name?"
  Amy caught herself before she spoke. She almost said. "He told me."  =20
But that didn't make any sense at all. So she said. "I don't know. I
just did."
  Amy looked at her watch and said. "It's time I started for home. What
about you?"
  "I can walk with you for a while."
They were walking along talking when suddenly Jericho jumped from Amy's
arms and ran ahead.=20
  "What's the matter with you?" ask Amy.
  The cat turned his head back towards Amy and meowed. Then he turned
away again and went behind a hedge.
  "Where are you going?" asked Amy.
  "Maybe this is where he lives." Offered Bill.
  Before she could respond the cat reappeared from behind the hedge and
meowed again.
  Amy couldn't explain it but somehow she just knew that the cat wanted
her to follow him.
  Amy got a cold knot in the pit of her stomach. All the feelings she
had been trying to fight off all day returned. But now they felt like
they were Super Sized.
  "Billy. Stay here." Amy said putting a hand on his shoulder.
Bill must have felt something also because he didn't complain that she
called him Billy again.
  "Why?"=20
  "Just wait here. Please"
  Amy turned back towards the cat and slowly walked towards him. As she
neared the cat he disappeared behind the hedge again. Slowly Amy reached
the hedge and walked around the corner. Not knowing what she would find,
but she was sure it wouldn't be pleasant.
  She was not disappointed. What she saw was what remained of some kind
of small animal. But she wasn't sure what. The mass of fur, blood, and
bone seemed to have been torn apart. It could have been almost anything.
It was too large to be a squirrel. Maybe a fox, or maybe=85
  Amy couldn't even finish the thought. The knot in her stomach
tightened again.=20
  Slowly she walked towards the mass and knelt by it. Seeing something
she thought she recognized she overrode her first instinct and reached
out to pick it up. As she feared it appeared to be a dog's collar. There
was a metal name tag tacked to the collar but it was obscured by blood,
and fur.
  Already knowing what she would find Amy wiped the collar on the grass.
Amy felt tears in her eyes, but she forced them back as she read the
name tag. Engraved in large block letters it said "SPARKEY".


Chapter 3                =20
Wednesday 8:30 p.m.

  It was after dark by the time Amy made it to the front door of her
house. Her feet felt like they were dragging as she stepped through the
door and dropped her book bag on a near by chair.
  "Amy, is that you?" Amy heard her father's voice from the next room.
  "Oh no." thought Amy. "He's got that worried tone in his voice."
  Amy watched her father walk into the room holding the cordless
phone.   "Where have you been? Why didn't you call?"
  Then he put the phone back to his mouth and said. "Connie? Yeah it's
her."
  "Connie." Thought Amy. "That would be Marlene's Mother."=20
  "I don't know yet."
  "Yes I'll let you know. Bye."
  "Now young lady." Said Kevin Madison. "Just where have you been? Why
didn't you at least?=85"
  "Honey. What's the matter?" Said Amy's father seeing that something
was really bothering her. "Is that blood? Are you hurt? What happened?!"
Amy looked down at her jeans and seeing the blood that she must have
wiped there after she had handled the dog collar.
  "Yes. No." Amy said. Then the events of the day finally got to Amy. =20
Her voice breaking up she dropped her head, covered her eyes, and said.
"I don't know."
  Her father walked up to her and put an arm around her. Guiding her to
the sofa he said. "Sit down and tell me what happened."
  "I don't know where to start."
  "The beginning's always a good place. Just start there and tell me
everything."
  Amy left out a few details. Just the really weird stuff about the
strange feelings. And being watched by a cat that adopted her. Some
things were best kept to herself till she figured them out.


  By the time Amy finished the edited story of the days events, she was
starting to clear away the dishes from the dinner that they had fixed
while talking.
  "I know I should have called but, first I got Billy home, then one
thing lead to another." Explained Amy.
  "Usually you do call. That's why when I didn't hear from you I started
to get worried." Her father said. "If you had called I could have driven
over and picked you up. That would have saved you a long walk home in
the dark."
  Turning towards the back door Amy said. "Do you hear something?"
  "No. I don't hear anything."
  "I wasn't sure if he would show up, so I didn't say anything before."
Said Amy as she walked to the back door.
  "Show up. Who's showing up?" Her dad asked.
  Amy opened the back door stepped outside and said. "There you are. I
knew you would come."  When she returned she was holding Jericho.
  "Daddy. This is my cat."
  "Cat. What do you mean your cat. We never discussed getting a cat." =20
Her father said as she walked up to him holding the cat.
  But even as he spoke her father reached out and scratched Jericho
under the chin. The cat responded by purring loudly.
  "See. He likes you." Smiled Amy. "Please Daddy. Can he stay?"
  Her father paused then said. "Well I suppose we can give it a try. But
just a trial run. We'll try it for a few days."
  "Oh thank you Daddy. You won't regret it."
  "Well, just remember he's your responsibility."
  "I will. Thanks again."
  Her father stood and kissed her on the forehead. "I'm just glad you're
all right. But next time call. Okay?"
  Then he turned to leave the room and said. "I'm going to see what's on
the TV. Care to join me?"
  "No thanks. I'm got some homework to do."
  After he had left the room Amy sat the cat down. "Let's see if we can
find for you to eat." She opened the refrigerator and pulled out a
bottle of milk." She was just starting to open the cabinet to get a
saucer when she said. "Yes he did give in pretty quick."
  Amy had just set the saucer on the counter when she stopped and looked
around. "Who?" She wondered. "Was I talking to?"  Looking down near her
feet she saw Jericho sitting there, just staring back at her.
  "I could have sworn I was answering somebody's question." Amy said
turning to the cat. "Was it you?"
  The cat just stared at her
  After she filled the saucer with milk she knelt down and placed the
saucer on the floor for the cat. As Jericho began to drink Amy gently
stroked his back and said quietly . "Just what are you anyway."
  The only response was "Meooow."


Chapter 4
Thursday 7:50 a.m.

  "Well, I just could not believe that skirt she was wearing yesterday.
And those shoes. Don't these people know that open toes are totally last
year?"
  "I just can't believe it." Amy answered Marlene with a slight smile.
It was good to know that no matter how weird things got, there were some
things you could count on. And Marlene's oblivious state of mind about
many things was one of them.=20
  If there was one thing Amy had plenty of in her life it was weirdness.
But these last few days were the weirdest in a while. On the weird scale
of one to ten, they would rate as bizarre. With a capital "B". This
morning she had awakened feeling much like yesterday. That feeling that
she still couldn't describe was still there. Just slightly less intense.
  Amy and Marlene turned at the sound of a car horn. Amy recognized the
car that belonged to Toni's older brother Kyle pulling up to the curb.
The door opened and Toni stepped out.
  "Hi guys." Said Toni.
  "Hi." Echoed Amy and Marlene.
  "We stopped by your house this morning. Where were you?" Marlene
asked.
  "I had to drop my mom's car at the shop. Kyle picked me up.
  "Hello Marlene. Amy." Kyle said from the car. He was a freshman at
North Central State College located just south of town. He was tall, and
wiry with wavy short brown hair. "Can I give you girls a lift to
school?"
  "Sure." Said Amy after looking at her two friends.
Toni got back into the front seat while Amy and Marlene climbed into the
back.
  After a quick round of hellos and how are you's Toni asked. "So do you
guys think that there really is a pack of wild dogs wondering about
town?"
  "What do you mean?" Asked Amy.
  "Haven't you heard? Where have you been lately?" Asked Toni. "For the
last week there have been all kinds of stories about people finding
small animals around town torn to bits."
  "No I haven't. I guess I haven't been paying much attention lately."
  "I'll say." Marlene chimed in. "She has been Miss Space Cadet these
last few days."
  "Whatever." Toni said. "The most popular theory is that a pack of wild
dogs prowling around."
  "I think it's some kind of devil worshipping cult." Said Kyle.
  "What ever is causing it," Said Marlene. "It sure has a lot of people
wigged out.
  "I saw one of the victims yesterday. That must have been what it was."
Said Amy. "You couldn't even tell it was a dog."
  "You saw one?" Said Marlene. "Uhhh. That would give me the wiggins for
sure. How could you sleep?"
  As the conversation continued on the subject of the animal attacks
Amy's depression / apprehension began to deepen. By the time they got to
school she'd grown totally quite. What is going on? She thought. I'm not
sure what it is, but I have this feeling that these animal attacks are=20
somehow connected to these feelings I've been getting. I just don't know
what's going on, but I will find out. And I've got a good idea where to
start.


****
  End of Part 2



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: Jeff Weitkamp <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: School Spirits.   Part 3
Date: 14 Jun 1998 14:14:43 -0700

Name:  School Spirits
Author: Jeff W
E-Mail: [e-mail]
Feedback: Yes please. Tell me anything. Was is good, bad, or what.
Distribution: Please ask and I'll say yes.
Summary: This story dosn't involve Buffy and Co. directly although they
do make apperances. The main character is Amy Madison from 'The Witch'
and 'Bewitched, Bothered, and Bewildered' which are both being aired
this week on WB. But don't worry my next story will have the regular
crew.
Spoilers: The Witch.
Rating: PG
Time line: After Whe Witch. Sometime before Prophecy Girl.
Disclaimer: Most of the characters in this story belong to Joss Wheadon
ect. The only characters I can claim are Toni, Kyle and Marlene.

*****************************************
School Spirits   Part 3


It wasn't till third period that Amy got a chance to go to the school
library. As she neared the library she noticed an older lady dressed as
a member of the custodial staff standing near the door. She was a little
taller than Amy with an average build. She had a dark complexion and jet
black hair that showed a few streaks of gray. For a moment it seemed
that she may have been listening at the door, but Amy wasn't sure
because at the same moment that she noticed her the lady began to move
up the hall towards Amy. Had she seen Amy watching her?
As during the previous day the strange feelings would come and go. But
she could determine no pattern. Now Amy felt the hairs on the back of
her neck begin to stand like it had so many times during the previous
two days. Was this related or just a coincidence?
The lady stopped at a water fountain and began to clean it. She seemed
to be ignoring Amy. But as they passed each other their eyes met for an
instant. Was it her imagination or did Amy feel something from this
woman? Some kind of energy? Amy couldn't tell if it was coming from this
woman or not. But she did feel something.
While Amy was walking by the woman she glanced at the woman's name tag.
It said Susan Li-something. They passed each other to quickly to make
the whole name out. This one will require watching thought Amy to
herself.
When Amy entered the library Cordelia was just saying "It's major sick-o
if you ask me. Those poor little things."
Cordelia was sitting at the table next to Xander Harris. "Funny." Amy
thought. I would never have pictured them together."=20
Also in the room was Mr. Giles standing near his office door. Willow
Rosenberg at the table with her computer open. And Buffy Summers sitting
on the counter.
As one the group stopped talking and looked up at Amy as she walked in.
"Let me guess." Said Amy. "Your talking about what has been attacking
small animals around town lately? Right?"
" It's not just small animals." Said Willow.
"Willow!" Said Buffy.
"Oh. I didn't mean=85 I mean that it is just small animals=85 I mean, wha=
t
animals?"
"Nice cover Will." Said Xander. "I know I'm convinced."
"But it's just Amy. She.." Said Willow in her defense. "Oh."  Willow
said turning to Amy." I didn't mean that you=85" Then turning back to
Xander continued "She already knows about=85" She paused. "Never mind. I'=
m
shutting up now. This is me shutting up."
"That's all right  Willow." Said Buffy jumping down off the counter and
Walking towards her. "Why do you ask Amy?"
"A friends dog was one of the victims."=20
"Uch. Not good."
"It gets worse. I was with him when he found his dog. He was just
thirteen."
"How did he take it?"
"He put on a good show. Wanted to show everyone he was all grown up. But
you could see he was covering up."
"Have there been many other victims?" Asked Amy.
"On the farm's around town there have been two sheep and a cow killed."
Said Willow.
"Did you see anything unusual when you found the dog Amy?" Asked Giles.
"You mean besides the puddle-o-puppy?" Replied Amy. "No, should I have?"
"No, no. Not necessarily."=20
"You know something don't you?" Amy asked. "You know what's going on?
Don't you? I knew if there was something weird going on you guys would
have some answers."
"Well." Said Giles as he nervously took off his glasses and cleaned
them. "We know what it isn't. It's not vampires. They never do more than
drink the blood. It could be a demon, but I haven't found anything in my
books that match this pattern. One problem is that it's happening on a
small scale. Then again the explanation may not be paranormal at all.
The whole thing may be of a normal origin."=20
"You mean it could be just some weird guys who get their chuckles from
this kind of sick stuff?" Asked Buffy.
"Yes I suppose so. But considering that we are sitting on top of the
Hell Month=85"
"So, what your saying is," Said Amy. "That you don't have a clue."
"No. There are lots of clues." Said Willow. " We just haven't figured
out what they mean yet."
"There is one thing that I do feel sure of." Said Buffy. "Since we are
sitting on top of the Hell Mouth, it's just a matter of time before
something really bad happens."
Giles walked up to Amy and said. "In any case. Thanks for your
information Amy." As he took her by the elbow and gently guided her
towards the door. "We will be sure to inform you if we find out
anything."
"Su.. Sure." Stuttered Amy.
After she had gotten into the hallway and the door closed behind her Amy
thought with a touch of anger. "Well. I guess I've been dismissed."


The rest of the day pasted slowly. Amy found it hard to concentrate on
school. She spent a lot of time monitoring her feelings trying to
determine their source. And watching for Susan L- something, but she
never saw her.
Just before the last class came to the end Amy heard a commotion
outside. Looking out the window she saw the source of the disturbance.
Outside were a group of about twenty people walking in a circle carrying
signs, and chanting slogans like "Give us back our Land."
"They're  back again." Said a boy a couple of seats behind Amy.
"You'd think they would give up by now." Somebody else replied.
For about the last month or so, once a week a group of Native Americans
have been staging a protest in front of the school. Something about the
school, or more precisely the football field, being built on ancient
tribal burial grounds.
They would walk around carrying their signs and chanting slogans till
the police showed up and broke then up, or arrested a few. The first
time it happened all kinds of TV and radio stations had crews filming
and talking to people. But the last time only one TV crew showed up. I
guess even in Sunnydale news gets old fast thought Amy.
"All right class." Said Miss Phelps. "It's nothing you haven't seen
before. Sit back down. There is still ten minutes left in class."
Fifteen minutes later Amy was walking out the front entrance to the
school. The protesters were still there. As were two police cars and
four policemen. Amy could see one of the policemen and one of the
protesters off to one side talking tougher.
Then over to her left Amy saw Susan L- whatever leaning against a tree,
and watching what was happening with interest. Amy saw a perfect
opportunity to verify whether this lady had anything to do with the
weird feelings she had been experiencing lately.
Amy began to walk in her direction while trying not to look like she was
walking in that direction. She angled to pass just behind the tree that
Susan stood next to. As she neared the woman and casually walked behind
the tree Amy could feel the impression grow. Then after she passed the
and began to walk away she could feel the oppressive sensation decrease
like a weight being lifted from her spirit.
Amy walked a short distance away and sat on a bench to contemplate what
it all meant. And what, if anything she should do next.
"Hey girl. Where did you go after class?  What are you doing hanging
around here? Hoping to see something happen over there."=20
Amy looked up to see Toni standing there looking down at her.
"I was just thinking."
"About what? And why here?"
"No real reason." Said Amy as she stood up. "Come on. Let's go home."
"No argument from me." Toni said as they began to walk.
At first Amy didn't realize that the direction the had started to walk
would bring them very close to the tree that Suzie Quzie had been
standing next to. But just before they got there she did. Probably
because of the hair beginning to stand up on her neck.
Just before they reached the tree Amy and Toni were startled when Susan
Li- whatever stepped from behind the tree blocking their way.
"Don't think that I haven't noticed you sneaking around child." Said the
older woman with a harsh emphasis on child. "Do not interfere in things
you do not understand."
 Being confronted by the woman face to face was almost more than Amy
could handle. The sheer presence of the woman was almost overpowering.
It was all she could do not to panic. Amy hadn't felt anything like that
since=85 Since she last saw her mother.
The thought of her mother on top of everything else made Amy weak in the
knees. All she could do was think "Oh God!"
"Creepy much?" Said Toni.
A look of rage started to spread across  the older woman's face as she
looked between the two girls. Her mouth started to move in some kind of
silent mantra. And she reached under the gray smock for something. And
for just a moment Amy thought that the woman's face seemed to be
superimposed with the face of some kind of hideous looking dog.
Just as Amy was about to turn and run the three of them were distracted
by a loud commotion near the street. As the woman turned towards the
clamor her face returned to normal.
When Amy looked to see what was happening she saw that brawl had broken
out between the police, and the protesters.
Somehow Amy regained enough composure to grab Toni by the arm and shout.
"Run!"
Toni didn't have to be told twice. The two girls ran away from the woman
or whatever had just been standing in front of them.
Amy didn't turn back when she heard the woman yell. "Remember what I
said child. Do not interfere in matters that do not concern you. If you
do you will suffer!"
The girls continued to run as they heard police sirens approaching the
school.


"Would you mind telling me what that was all about?" Toni asked a few
minutes later when they stopped running. "What did ol Miss Littledeerie
mean about not interfering?"
"Who?" Asked Amy.
That creepy old lady back at school.
"Oh, her. I didn't know her last name."
"It said Littledeer on her name tag. Well are you going to tell me what
is happening?"
Amy sat down under a tree and said. "I afraid you might think I'm
crazy."
Toni just stood there looking down at Amy with her hands on her hips.
Amy gave a deep sigh and said. "Okay sit down and I'll tell you. But
first you have to promise not to tell anyone else."
"I promise."
"All right. But when you think this sounds crazy, don't say I didn't
warn you."
"I promise again." Toni said as she sat under another tree a few feet
away so she could look at Amy as she talked.
"Well, I told you that my mom was some kind of witch. Well I think it's
a kind of mother daughter thing. So what ever made mom a witch somehow
gets passed on to me. But I don't have any idea how to use it. Or if I
even won't to."
Amy glanced at Toni to reassure herself that she was taking her
seriously.
Over the next half hour Amy told Toni all about the eerie feelings over
the past few days, and how she suspected that Susan Littledeer somehow
involved. All about finding the cat, and what she suspected about him.
She also told Toni about how she thought the animal attacks were somehow
connected with everything else.
Amy left out any mention of the Hell Mouth, or Buffy and Co. She was
afraid that would be too much. Besides since that involved others she
didn't feel she should reveal their secrets.
During the time that Amy told Toni everything, they had gotten up and
started walking home. They were nearing Amy's house when she finished
her story. Amy paused while she glanced at Toni, then said. "That's
pretty much everything. This would be the point where you laugh and tell
me to go lie down and take a strong dose of Prozac."
Toni walked beside Amy for a few minutes in silence while she digested
the story. Finally she said. "That is a pretty weird story. But I think
I believe you. After seeing little miss dog face back there. And I know
that you didn't makeup the story about all the animals being killed.
Besides the whole story is just to strange to makeup."
 Amy was unlocking the door to her house as she said. "I guess I'm glad
to hear you say that."
Toni smiled and said. "So. What's our next move?"
"What do you mean our? Are you sure you want to get involved?"
"Sure. Might be fun."
Amy looked at Toni and said. "Maybe we're both crazy."
"Hey your not going to give up are you?"
"No. Of course not."
"Well you're going to need some help."=20
The girls put their book bags on the kitchen table. Toni sat down while
Amy got them some drinks.
"Well, what's our next move." Toni asked again.
Amy sat the drinks on the table and said. "Okay. Do you think your
brother is home?"
"Probably."
"Do you think he would give us a ride?"
"I'm sure he would if you asked." Toni said with a sly look.
"What do you mean?"
"Don't tell me you haven't noticed. Ah, Come on. He got it for you."
"Me? We are talking about Kyle aren't we?"
"He's the only brother I have."
"You're kidding right?"
"No. He wouldn't admit it to me, but I can tell. So call him and ask."
"I couldn't. Not after hearing that. You do it."
"How are you going to stand up to Miss Doggie Breath if you're such a
big chicken." Toni asked while she picked up the phone and dialed.
After a moment she said. "Hi Kyle. It's Toni. I've got someone here who
wants to talk to you." Toni displayed a devilish smile and handed the
phone to Amy.
"No." Amy mouthed wordlessly starring at the phone like it was some kind
of snake.
Toni just sat there grinning and holding out the phone to Amy.
After a moment Amy silently said "You'll pay for this."
Then Amy took the phone and said. "Hi Kyle. It's Amy."
"Oh I'm fine. How about you?"
"That's great. Listen Kyle, I need to ask you a favor."


Twenty minutes later Kyle pulled into the Madison's driveway.
Immediately the front door open and Amy, and Toni stepped out. Amy was
holding Jericho in her arms.
"What are you doing with that cat in my car?" Kyle asked when Amy had
sat down in the front seat.
"It's kinda hard to explain." Said Amy. "Don't worry. He won't hurt
anything."
Kyle reached out and scratched the cat under the chin. The cat sniffed
at his hand then began to lick it.
"See." Amy said. "He likes you."
"So where are we going." Asked Kyle. "I'd guessed that you wanted to go
to the Mall. But since you have the cat maybe you want to go to the
Vet."
"No. Nothing like that." Said Amy. "I need you to take us to Oak St."
"And why do you need to go there?" Asked Kyle as he backed out of the
driveway."
"I was over there yesterday and I think I lost something."
Ten minutes later they reach Oak St.
"Go right." Amy instructed. "Good now just keep going this way. But go
slow so I can tell you where to stop."
During the ride Jericho had sat quietly in Amy's lap. But as they drove
down the street he stood up on his back feet and placing his front paws
on the dash stared intently out the window.
"Stop here." Amy said as they neared the spot she remembered finding
Sparkey.
When Kyle stopped the car Amy opened the door to get out. As soon as the
door opened Jericho jumped down and out the door.
"Stop him!" Said Kyle.
"It's okay." Said Amy. "He won't run away."
Jericho trotted ahead towards the same break in the hedge that they had
passed through yesterday.
As he neared the hedge he stopped, turned his head to Amy and meowed.
"Yes I'm coming."  Said Amy.
The whole scene was so much like the previous day that Amy had a feeling
of deja-vu. So much so that she was slightly surprised when she turned
the corner and didn't see the bloody mess that had once been Sparkey.
She did however see Jericho standing there. He meowed and pawed at
something underneath the hedge.
Amy knelt near the cat to see what he was pawing at. In the shadows all
she could make out was a shape that may or may not of been a stick. She
reached out and picked it up. When she pulled the object into the light
she recognized it for what it was and with a gasp dropped it.
It was the dried remains of the foot of some kind of small animal. Amy
wasn't sure what kind though. She didn't even want to think about that.
After a moment she steeled herself enough to pick up the foot. It was
about four inches long and hard to the touch. It was covered in some
kind of brownish-gray fur. On one end was what very obviously were toe
nails. Wrapped around the foot were thick green, and red threads. The
thread was wrapped around the foot to form a diagonal crossing pattern.
And on top side of the foot there were four beads, three red and one
green that were held on by the thread.
As she held the foot in her hand Amy could sense that at one time this
object had possessed dome kind of power. It was now used up but it had
been there.
"What have you got there?" Toni asked when Amy emerged from behind the
hedge.
"I think it's what I was looking for."
"You think." Said Kyle. "Didn't you know what you were looking for when
we came out here?"
Amy smiled weakly and said. "No. Not exactly."
As Amy began to walk towards the car Kyle pointed at the hedge and
asked. "Aren't we going to get your cat."
"No need." Asked Amy. "He's already waiting for us."
Kyle looked at the car where Amy pointed. His mouth stood open as he saw
Jericho inside the car with his head and front paws sticking out the
passenger side window watching them.
After a moment Kyle was able to speak. "Where to now?"
Amy looked at her watch and said. "Let's go home now. But later can you
take us somewhere else?"
"Sure. Where to.? The Bronze?"
"No. Not tonight." Amy said. "I think I need to go back to school."


*********
   End of Part 3



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: Jeff Weitkamp <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: School Spirits.  Part 4
Date: 14 Jun 1998 14:24:20 -0700

Name:  School Spirits
Author: Jeff W
E-Mail: [e-mail]
Feedback: Yes please. Tell me anything. Was is good, bad, or what.
Distribution: Please ask and I'll say yes.
Summary: This story dosn't involve Buffy and Co. directly although they
do make apperances. The main character is Amy Madison from 'The Witch'
and 'Bewitched, Bothered, and Bewildered' which are both being aired
this week on WB. But don't worry my next story will have the regular
crew.
Spoilers: The Witch.
Rating: PG
Time line: After Whe Witch. Sometime before Prophecy Girl.
Disclaimer: Most of the characters in this story belong to Joss Wheadon
ect. The only characters I can claim are Toni, Kyle and Marlene.


******************
School Spirits   Part 4


Chapter 5
Thursday 9:30 p.m.

  Amy peered around the corner towards the library. The hallway was dark
except for the night time lighting that provided just enough light to
safely navigate the halls, and the light from inside the library. She
almost jumped when she felt a hand on her back. Amy turned around to see
Toni still behind her.
  "Don't sneak up on me like that." Amy whispered.
  "I didn't sneak up on you. I've been here the whole time."=20
  Amy could detect a high level of excitement in her whispered voice. I
can't believe she is enjoying this that much thought Amy.
  "Do you see anything?" Ask Toni.
  "The lights are on. But I can't tell if anyone is there."
  "Guys. I'm really beginning to think this is not a good idea." Said
Kyle. "I would say that this is probably really high on the list of not
good ideas."
  "I never thought you would be such a scardie." Said Toni.
  "I am not scared!"
  Amy turned around placed a hand over each of their mouths and said. =20
"Remember why were. This is sneaky time remember?"
  Toni started to speak but a glare from Amy silenced her.
  "That's better. Now be quiet."
  The pair silenced, Amy returned to the corner. She peered around the
corner then jerked her back when she saw the light in the library flood
the hallway as the door opened. Then the light inside went out.=20
  "They're coming." Amy whispered as she pushed her two friends back up
the hallway, then into a small alcove that lead to a classroom. "Be
quiet."
  "No it's too late to go to the Bronze Xander. You should go home and
study for your Chemistry test tomorrow. " Amy heard Willows' voice
coming closer.
  "Oh come on Will." Xander's voice sounded very close. "Cordie should
still be there. We don't have to stay late. I've been research boy all
night. I deserve a little fun and relaxation. You deserve some fun
too.   You need some fun. You've been working waaaay too hard lately.
Tell her Giles she'll listen to you."
  Giles spoke as the trio reached the entrance to the alcove where they
cowered in the darkness. Amy was too afraid to even breathe. "Well I'm
afraid I must agree."
  "See Willow. Listen to Giles. He's a smart guy." Xander said.
  "I'm afraid I must agree, with Willow. You should go home and study
for your test."
  "Willow, don't listen to him. To Giles the idea of going home and
studying for a test is fun."
  "And don't forget relaxing." Said Willow. "Now tomorrow=85"
  The voices began to fade as the group turned another corner.
  Amy let out a slow breath but stayed in hiding a few moments longer.
  After a short time hearing nothing Amy turned to Toni, and Kyle and
said. "Let's go. But be quiet."
  "Just call me Quiet Chick." Whispered Toni.
  Quietly. Slowly. They moved towards the library.
  Soon they were at the door and looking into the darkened room. Amy
pushed the door open and walked in. Feeling beside the door Amy found a
light switch and flipped it on.
  Toni walked in next and said. "I heard there was a library in our
school. So this is what it looks like."
  Toni walked into the middle of the room and said. "Ok we're here. What
are we looking for?"
  Amy shrugged and said. "I'm not exactly sure."
  As if on queue they heard a meow. Turing Amy saw Jericho pawing at the
door to Mr. Giles office.
  "But maybe we're about to find out." Said Amy.
  "This cat just rules." Said Kyle. "Where can I get me one? Do you
think he could find my=85?"
  "Hey jabber boy." Said Amy. "Could this wait?"
Amy walked to the door to the office and pushed it open. Jericho
immediately walked in. Amy followed tuning on the light as she entered.
Jericho jumped to the top of the desk. He walked to right side of desk.
Reaching over the edge he began to paw at the top drawer.
  Amy walked to the desk, and scratched Jericho behind one ear as she
stared at the drawer.
  After a moments hesitation she pulled the drawer open. Inside was an
old leather bound book. Amy picked up the book and looked at the faded
title on the spine of the book. It read "The Source of Magic."
  "This will make a good start." Amy said. "Why don't you guys look
around and see what you can find about animal sacrifices, or rituals."
  "You got it." Said Toni. She Turned around and said to Kyle. "Follow
me and I will show you how to use the things called books."
  "Be still my beating heart." Kyle said with a roll of his eyes.
Amy carried the book back to the table in the main room and sat down. =20
She opened the book to begin to read. Jericho jumped onto the table next
to the book and sat down and stared down at the book. Amy reached out
and stroked his back and began to read.

=85
 The source of magic is not of this world. Or even this dimension. But
it is very real. It comes from a different reality. This reality has
many names but is most often referred to as the Astral Plane, Physic
Dimension, or the Astral Reality.
Being a different dimension our physical laws do not always apply there,
nor do the laws of that dimension necessarily apply here.
It is the act of transferring, or channeling these elements of the
Astral dimension into our own that we call Magic. These manifestations
of astral energy can come in many forms. Their effects can range from
the benign to the devastating.=20
=85.
The methods of transferring Astral energy into the physical world are
many and varied. Anyone with the proper skill, and or training can
perform feats of magic. Some people are naturally inclined, or gifted to
do so.
=85
Some of the methods of magic use are but not limited to:
=85
Ritual or Ceremonial Magic.
Ritual magic can be accomplished by anyone given enough time and effort.
It usually involves long, complicated, and time consuming rites or
ceremonies.
=85
Pure or Natural Channelers.
These type of magic users are the most rare. They seem to be born with a
latent ability to accomplish feats of magic. With a few spoken words and
movements of the hands they can sometimes accomplish in seconds more
than a lesser person could not with a long ritual.
=85
Physical Channelers.
This type of magic user as some limited ability to naturally channel
Astral forces. But in order to achieve any real Magic they will
construct devices in our physical world that are connected to the astral
reality allowing the energy to be channeled through them. These items
are called many names such as a fetish or focus.
=85
Spirit Channelers.
Some believe that beings inhabit the astral plane. There are people with
some natural ability can establish a connection with these beings or
spirits. They can then call upon these spirits to assist them in
channeling astral energy into the physical world.
=85
Familiars.=20
Familiars are not human but are included here for completeness, And
their close relation to humans.
Familiars are Astral beings or spirits that inhabit animals of any type.
They have a strong connection to the Astral plane. Typically  they will
associate themselves to a person who has a strong connection to the
astral dimension. They will share their powers, and ability between each
other. The bond they share is very strong on a physic level. The death
or injury of either of the pair can have very detrimental effect on the
surviving member.
=85
These categories are general in nature. Some magic users fall into more
than one category. Some fall into none at all.
=85

  Amy sat up from her reading and stretched. Looking at the clock on the
wall she saw that it was after midnight. She looked at Jericho who had
sat next to her studying the book along with her the entire time.
  "Well kiddo." Said Amy. "I think that's enough for one night. Don't
you?"
  Amy closed the book and returned it to the drawer where she found it.
Returning to the main room she saw her two friends asleep. They had
searched for clues in the other books in the library. But the search had
turned up nothing. The  problem probably was due to the fact that we
really didn't know what we were looking for.
  Kyle was asleep with his feet propped up on the table. Amy walked over
to Toni who's head was resting on her arms which were crossed on the
table.
  Amy gently shook Toni and said. "Come on girlfriend. Let's go home."
  Toni stirred and mumbled, "Isn't today Saturday Mom?"
  Then she slowly sat up and rubbing her eyes said. "Amy? What time is
it?"
  "It's ten after twelve." Amy said as she began to wake Kyle. He
jerked  awake with a start.
  In a moment they were up and putting the library back the way they
found it when Kyle said. "Hey guys. What's up with the cat?"
  Turing to look where Kyle was pointing Amy saw Jericho standing there
looking towards the door. His ears were up and twitching like he was
listening to something.
  Amy stood there and listened. At first she heard nothing. Then
straining she could hear it. It sounded like someone chanting in the
distance.
  "Do you hear that?" Amy asked.
  "I don't hear anything." Said Kyle.
  "It sounds like someone chanting. But I can't make anything out."
  Then Jericho jumped down from the table and walked over to the door.
  "Come on." Amy said.
  When she reached the door she pushed it open and the cat walked out.
Amy turned off the lights and followed him out.
  The chanting hadn't gotten as louder as Amy expected when she walked
through the door. Then suddenly she realized she wasn't hearing it with
her ears. It was in her mind. Amy decided not to mention that to the
others because she knew they would think her crazy. But she knew there
was something there because the cat could sense it also.
  Jericho looked back at them and meowed. Then turning around again
began to walk down the hall. They followed behind.
  "Where are we going?" Asked Kyle.
  "Shhhhhh." Amy said because she couldn't think of a better answer.
  Soon the cat stopped at a door marked "Authorized Personnel Only", and
sat down.
  Amy noticed that the noise she was hearing in her head had gotten
louder, but she still could not make anything out.
  Amy opened the door onto a stairway leading down into a semi-darkness.
The sound of machinery drifted up from below. Amy thought she could just
make out the sound of drums.
  They descended the stairs following the cat. When he reached the
bottom he turned to the right. Amy could see his tail nervously moving
back and forth.
  They walked for a short distance. Up ahead Amy could make out an area
of brighter light coming from behind some kind of large machinery.  She
could also definitely hear the sound of a drum.
  When Jericho reached the machine he turned and disappeared behind
it.   When he did the sound of the drum stopped
  Amy looked back at her friends who just looked back at her. She turned
back around and continued to walk.=20
  When she reached the machine she stopped and peered around the
corner.   Amy saw what appeared to be an old man with long gray hair
pulled back into a ponytail. He was wearing a dark gray coverall like
Amy had seen the Janitors around school wear. He was dark probably a
Native American Amy thought.  He was sitting cross-legged on the floor.
Amy could also see Jericho sitting in his lap. The old man scratching
the cats chin.
The old man looked right at her and said in a strong voice. "Come in
child. I've been expecting you."
  Amy just stood there. Not knowing what to do.
  "Come in." The old man repeated smiling. "And bring your friends with
you."
  Amy could feel no danger but she was scared anyway. Slowly she walked
towards the old man. Toni and Kyle following close behind.
  "Come over and sit down we don't have a lot of time." Said the old
man. "My name is Calvin Redbear. But my friends call me Carl."
  "Hi." Said Amy. "My name is Amy. And these are my friends. Toni and
Kyle." Amy walked over and sat on the floor across them Carl. "You said
you were expecting us?"
  "I was expecting you."
  "Why?"
  "There is great evil around this place." Carl began. "Evil that if it
were totally released it could devour the world."
  "You mean the Hell-Mouth?" Asked Amy.
  "Yes, that is one of it's names. I see you have heard of it. My people
call it The Heart of Darkness. And for fifty years I have opposed this
evil. But I am an old man. I no longer have the strength to oppose the
evil. That is why you are here little Amy. You have been sent to take my
place."
  "Take your place." Said Amy. "As what?"
  "As an opponent of evil at the Heart of Darkness."
  "So are you some kind of witch or wizard or something?" Asked Amy.
  "My power comes from the great bear spirit. He has blessed me for many
years." Said Carl. "Among my people  I am called a shaman. I think in
the old movies we were called Medicine Men."
  "But why me?"
  "Because it is your destiny."
  "Well I don't want it. Give it to someone else" Said Amy sounding a
little desperate.
  "There  is no choice. You can not refused."
  "But I can't. I can't fight evil. I'm not a policeman or a, a,
Slayer."
  "Yes you can child. You have a gift. A power inside you that you have
not learned to use yet."
  "But=85" Stuttered Amy.
  "You know it is true. You can not avoid your destiny if you wanted to.
How else could you have come here at this time. Why do you think you've
been investigating what has been happening."
  Amy said nothing.
  "You see." Continued Carl. "In your heart you know the truth. You have
already started your work and didn't even realize it."
  Amy hung her head. She couldn't argue because she knew that the old
man was right.
  "But what can I do?" Amy finally asked. How will I do it."
  "You know the answer to that too. Look into your heart."
  Amy paused then said. "This power you talked about. You mean the power
of a witch, don't you? I'm one of those natural channelers that I read
about."
  The old man nodded.
  "But I don't know how to use this power." Said Amy.
  "You have in your possession the tools you need to learn."
  "You mean my mother's things don't you? They've been locked up since
she went away. I've been afraid to touch them."
  "Why are you afraid?" Asked Carl. "
  "I don't know."
  "Yes you do." Carl said gently. "You have locked up the feelings you
have from what happened. You will have to confront your ghosts or they
will haunt you for the rest of your life."
  "You also have a new friend." Carl said indicating the cat still in
his lap. "He will be of much help. My people would call his kind a
spirit companion. And he likes you very much."
  Amy was silent for a moment then said. "I don't want to be like my
mom."
  "You are not your mother." Carl said. "She chose her own path. She
gave into the temptation to use her powers for evil.  And she has paid
the price."
  "All right." Said Amy. "Let's say that I believe you and I have to
take up the broom stick to save the world."
  "There is a powerful force nearby." Said Carl. "The evil is growing
strong, and I am becoming to weak to continue to oppose it."
  "Let me guess." Said Amy. "Susan Littledeer right?"
  "See you have already figured out so much on your own." Carl said with
a smile.
  "Yes it is Susan." Carl continued. "At one time she was a student of
mine. I thought that one day she would replace me. She learned much, and
became very powerful. But that was not enough. She wanted more power.
And she wasn't concerned about the costs."
  "So she became a servant of the evil dog spirit of war that in the
ancient language of my people is known as Gawmac  Wo-ath. There is no
word in your language to translate. And now she seeks to open the heart
of darkness so that he may enter our world. And if he can enter our
world nothing may be able to stop him from destroying it."
  "Sounds like the plot of a bad TV mini-series, but based on what I've
see lately I believe it." Said Amy. "What can I do to stop her?"
  "The ritual that she must perform to open the Heart of darkness must
be performed on the night following a full moon." Carl said. "You must
stop her from completing the ritual. But she has  powerful magic and
will use it against you."
  "So it's my magic verse her magic." Sad Amy. "Well pack your bags
folks. Because if she is a powerful as you say how can I stop her when I
don't know any yet?"
  "You have much power in you. You must learn to use it before the night
of ritual." Said Carl.
  "And when is this ritual suppose to happen? How long do I have to
learn to save the world?" Asked Amy.
  Carl Smiled and said. "The next full moon is on Saturday, so the next
time the ritual can be performed is on Sunday."


*********************
End of Part 4



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: Jeff Weitkamp <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: School Spirits. Part 6   Conclusion
Date: 14 Jun 1998 14:51:54 -0700

Name:  School Spirits
Author: Jeff W
E-Mail: [e-mail]
Feedback: Yes please. Tell me anything. Was is good, bad, or what.
Distribution: Please ask and I'll say yes.
Summary: This story dosn't involve Buffy and Co. directly although they
do make apperances. The main character is Amy Madison from 'The Witch'
and 'Bewitched, Bothered, and Bewildered' which are both being aired
this week on WB. But don't worry my next story will have the regular
crew.
Spoilers: The Witch.
Rating: PG
Time line: After Whe Witch. Sometime before Prophecy Girl.
Disclaimer: Most of the characters in this story belong to Joss Wheadon
ect. The only characters I can claim are Toni, Kyle and Marlene.

*********************
School Spirits. Part 6  Conclusion

Chapter 8
Sunday 6:30 p.m.
  By the time the sun began to sit on Sunday evening Amy felt like a new
person. She could feel the power waiting there to enact her wishes.=20
  "This is something I can get used to." Said to herself.
  As soon as she did she was struck by her words. What am I saying she
thought. I am not going to turn out like my mom. I will not abuse my
powers.
  Amy's thoughts were interrupted by the phone. Picking it up she said,
"Hello."
  "Hi Amy." Came the voice over the phone.
  "Hi Toni."
  "I'm just calling to see if you were ready for me to pick you up."
  "Yes. I mean No." Said Amy. "I mean that Yes I'm ready. But no you're
not picking me up. I want you to stay home."
  "What do you mean stay home. I've been involved this much. You can't
exclude me now."
  "I don't want you to get hurt Toni."
  "But you may need help."
  "So what can you do for me. Hold my broom."
  The phone was silent for a moment. Then Amy said, "I'm sorry Toni.
That didn't come out right."
  "That's all right." Toni replied. "I just want to be of some help."
  "I know that. You've all ready been a lot's of help."
  "But=85"
  "Toni." Amy said. "It's going to be very dangerous out there. I'm not
sure I can protect you."
  "You let me worry about me."
  "How can I. If you're there I will worry. And I won't be to
concentrate on what I have to do."
  Neither of them said anything for a few seconds. Then Amy said. =20
"Please."
  "Oh, all right." Toni said.
  But Amy could here the hurt in her voice. But some hurt feelings were
better than a hurt or dead friend.
  "But promise me that you will be careful. "
  "I will."
  "You better mean that. If you go out there ant get your self hurt I'll
come over and kick your butt."
  "I Promise. I'll be careful."
  Then Toni asked. "Any idea where you need to go tonight."
  "Some how I feel that this involves the school. So I'm pretty sure
that it will happen around there. Because of the attention of those
protesters on the football field, I think I'll start there."

  Forty-five minutes later Amy was sitting under the bleachers looking
on to the football field. She'd was about ready to go look somewhere
else when she saw some movement near the gate. Amy could tell that
Jericho sitting beside her felt it also because he let out a soft hiss.
 Under the nearly full moon Amy watched for a while as the person walked
into the end zone at the near end of the field.
  The person knelt on one knee and started taking some items out of some
kind or large bag.
   Amy could tell that the person she was watching was a woman. It has
to be Littledeer Amy thought. Her suspicions were confirmed when the
woman made a motion with her hand and a small ball of magical fire
jumped from her hand and into a small pile of wood she had just built.
  Amy watched as Littledeer began to chant and dance around the fire.
>From where she sat Amy could feel the magic of the ritual begin to grow.
It's now or never  Amy thought. Then she climbed out from underneath the
bleachers and  walked towards the woman.
  As she approached Amy could make out that Susan Littledeer was dressed
in a buckskin   dress and sneakers. Amy stopped about twenty away and
watched for a moment.
  Susan Littledeer must have sensed her presence because suddenly she
stopped her dancing and chanting. Then she began to slowly turn around.
  "Don't you know there is a no trash burning law in Sunnydale?" Amy
asked.
  The older woman looked at Amy and smiled saying, "I thought I told you
to stay out of things that do not concern you child."
  "Well call me overly sensitive," Amy said. "But I consider the
unleashing of terrible evils on my town to be my business."
  "What do you know of evil child. Evil is the wrongs that the white man
has done to my people for hundreds of years. Compared to that Evil the
vengeance of Gawmac  Wo-ath is nothing."
  "I wasn't talking about Go Mack Wo Wo." Amy Said. "I was talking about
that awful outfit your wearing."
  Then with a motion of her hand Amy cast a spell. A bolt of astral
energy leapt from her hand and towards Littledeer.
  The magical missile struck the woman. But all it succeeded in doing
was knocking her back a step.
  "Is that your best child?" Littledeer taunted. "If it is you might as
well leave now and quit wasting my time." Then she fingered a bracelet
on her wrist.
  Amy suddenly felt every nerve on fire. The torment seemed to last for
hours. Finally the pain was gone and Amy fell to her knees.
  As Amy stood up she realized that they were not alone. She could see
just outside the circle of light several large figures that appeared to
be large dogs. She heard one near by give off a low growl.
  "Still here." Said Littledeer. "I'm surprised you haven't gone running
off to mommy."
  Amy felt anger build up inside her. She launched a powerful attack
spell at Littledeer. But her opponent cast a spell of her own. The
torrents of astral energy collided between the two opponents canceled
each other out.
  Amy concentrated on her spell. Trying to channel more force into it in
order to overcome Littledeer. However Littledeer was attempting the
same. This continued for a while. Neither able to gain an advantage.
  Then Amy sensed something to her right. One of the dogs was charging
her. With out thinking Amy sent a small blast at the charging hound. The
missile struck the dog in the snout knocking it back. The dog yelped and
ran away."
  But the distraction was enough. Without warning Amy's spell collapsed
as it was overcome by Littledeer's"
  Amy felt herself swept off her feet and into the air. She was spun
around violently as if caught up in some kind of tornado. Amy found
herself unable to concentrate enough to cast a spell or do anything
else.
  Amy started to feel darkness creep up on her. This is it she thought.
Over before it has begun. And not only was she going to die so was
everybody else in Sunnydale. And it was all her fault.
  As swiftly as it had begun the tornado disappeared. Amy flew
uncontrolled through the air. She came to rest on her hands and knees.
  As Amy's senses began to return to normal she looked up. There was
Littledeer not more than five feet from her also on her hand's and
knees. Standing above and behind Littledeer was Toni holding a shovel in
her hands. Amy could see Kyle behind her with another shovel keeping the
dogs at bay.
  "That's for messing with my friends." Toni said.
  Amy tried to speak but couldn't yet.
  Littledeer started to stand up but Toni swung the shovel striking her
on the back and shoulders, and sending her back to her hands and knees.
  "And that Susie is for messing with my school!"
  Littledeer attempted to rise but  received another whack with the
shovel for her troubles.
  "And that is for messing with my town!"
Littledeer sat on her hands and knees for a moment hardly moving. Then
her hand shot up pointing at Toni. Toni was hurled away dropping the
shovel.
  Littledeer sat and prepared to cast another spell at Toni.
Without thinking Amy launched herself at the older woman striking her in
the chest and knocking her to the ground.
  The two grappled for a moment. But eventually Littledeer's size gave
her enough of an edge to pin Amy to the ground. Then her hands grabbed
=20
Amy by the throat and begin to choke her.
  Amy was unable to pry the fingers from her throat. Desperately she
grasped for something. Her fingers came to rest on a small leather pouch
at Littledeers waist. Amy pulled it away.
  Immediately Littledeer noticed. "No!" She cried as her hands came away
from Amy's throat and grabbed for the pouch. Desperately both women
pulled a the pouch. Littledeer managed to stand to get better leverage.
  Suddenly there was a loud ripping noise as the bag came apart.
  "Noooooooo!" screamed Littledeer.
  The contents of the bag fell to the ground. But the part of the bag
that remained in Littledeers hands started to glow. Then it started to
grow in size.
  Then the glowing mass of energy began to swirl as it hovered in
midair.
  Then the glowing mass lost the shape of a ball and began to resemble
some sort of whirlpool of energy seen from the top. Then things began to
be drawn into the rapidly growing vortex.
  Littledeer tried to move away but some sort of invisible force seemed
to grab her and began to pull her into the maelstrom.
  "No. NOOOOOOOOOO!" she screamed as she made a desperate leap to get
clear.
  "Help me." She pleaded.
  Amy could now see that Littledeer's body appeared to assume an
elongated shape as her legs were drawn toward the swirling mass.
  Amy reached out for her hands.
  "Help me. Pleaseeeee, Help Me." Cried Littledeer as she desperately
grabbed hold of Amy's hands.
  Amy immediately felt herself being dragged along the ground with her.
  Then Amy felt a strong pair of arms wrap themselves around her
waist.   Their forward motion came to almost a complete stop. Then Amy
felt themselves begin to move again.
  Littledeer sounded on the verge of panic as she wailed. "Don't let go.
Please save me."
  But despite all her efforts Amy felt the hands begin to slip from
hers.
  Littledeer must have felt it also because she began to scream. "Help
me. Please Help me. Don't let goooo=85"
  The last word turned into a shriek as Amy felt the fingers slip from
hers.
  Then Littledeer was pulled inside shrieking.
  When the woman was pulled in the vortex quickly began to shrink. As it
did the sound of the screaming stopped. But some physic level Amy
continued to hear it. And this sorrowful, pitiful lament chilled her
soul. The Physic aftershock of a person's physical body being pulled
across into the astral was one that Amy would remember for a long time.
  All the pent-up emotions from the last few days came rushing to the
surface. These emotions along with the physic aftershock overpowered
her. Amy got to her knees, buried her face in her hands and began to
cry.

Epilog
Sunday 8:30 p.m.

  "Amy are you okay"?
  Amy looked up to see Kyle standing over her. It must have been him who
grabbed her and kept her from being sucked into that maelstrom.=20
  Amy nodded her hear head and said. "Yeah I'm fine."
  Kyle nodded his head and moved to Toni who was starting sit up. Amy
followed.
  "I thought I told you to stay out of this?" Amy said.
  "Well that's gratitude for you. In case you didn't notice girl we just
saved your butt."
   "If that were true," Amy smiled. "You know that I couldn't admit it
because you'd never let me forget it. Are you okay?"
  "I don't think anything's broken."
  "Good can you stand?"
  "I think so." Toni slowly stood up. Except for a slight limp she
seemed to be okay.
  Then Kyle said nervously. "Can we get out of here now?"
  "Sounds good to me." Amy said. "Let's hit the road."
  "Where did you leave the car?" Amy asked. "Please tell me you brought
a car."
  "It's right over there." Said Kyle.
As Amy turned to head towards the car she felt something against her
leg. Looking down she could make out Jericho in the moonlight.
  Amy bent down and picked up the cat and said, "Hi their fellow."
  Then the trio began to walk towards the car.
As they walked Jericho turned his head to the right and picked up his
ears.
  "Stop." Amy whispered.
  They came to a stop and stood there.
  "What is it"? Asked Toni.
  "Shhh. Listen." Amy replied. "Do you hear that?"
  "What?" I don't hear anything."
  The cat jumped out of her arms and headed to the right. The group
following behind.
  As she moved forward the sound became more distinctive. It sounded
like something whimpering.
  Soon they came upon a small puppy huddled in the grass. It was
obviously very scared.
  "Oh he's so cute." Said Amy as she began to pick it up.
  Kyle grabbed her arm and said. "Are you sure it's safe? Remember the
dog lady. Koo Koo Ka Choo.
  Amy could feel a slight trace of residual magic from the puppy, but
nothing active.
  "It's safe now. I think that Susan must have used some magic to turn
this little guy into one of her guard dogs. But now that she's gone the
spell has been broken."
  "Amy picked up the puppy and said, "Come on fella. I know a little boy
that you can make very happy."

  They were still three blocks from Amy's street when flashing red and
blue lights appeared behind them. "Oh no." Said Kyle.
  "I don't need this." Said Amy. "I just want to go home. And go to
bed."
  Kyle pulled over the curb and stopped the car. As he rolled down the
window the policeman walked up.
  "Sir the reason I pulled you over is because you ran a stop sign back
there." Said the policeman.
  "But I did stop at the sign."
  "That's not the way I saw it sir. Could I see some identification."
Amy shook her head and thought. This is stupid. Then a smile crossed her
face when an idea struck her.
  Then she looked at the policeman and said, "You don't need to see his
identification."
  The policeman looked at Amy for second then said a little stiffly. "We
don't need to see his identification."
  Amy could see Kyle looking between herself and the policeman with his
mouth open. But she ignored him as she said, "These aren't the droids
you're looking for."
  The policeman repeated in a more normal sounding voice. "These aren't
the droids we're looking for."
  Amy could see Kyle struggling to stifle a laugh as she said. "He can
go about his business."
  Dutifully the officer repeated. "You can go about your business."
  Amy was now smiling as she said. "Move along."
The policeman stood up waving his arm and said. "Move along. Move
along."
  They managed to wait till they had started moving and the windows were
up before they all burst into laughter.
  Finally Kyle managed to say. "I can't believe you did that."
  "What can I say." Said Amy. "I could tell he was just a jerk looking
to make his quota for the month. Besides I wondered if I could pull it
off."
  "Well thanks." Said Kyle.
  After a moment he said, "Since were quoting old movies you know what I
have to say this don't you?"
  "What?" Asked Amy. "Use the Force, or May the Force be with you."
  "No, no." Said Kyle. "That's way to wrong in this situation."=20
  "Then what?" Ask Amy.
  Kyle looked her in the face said. "Amy. This looks like the beginning
of a beautiful friendship."


                              The End?



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: Jeff Weitkamp <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: School Spirits.  Part 5
Date: 14 Jun 1998 16:00:43 -0700

Name:  School Spirits
Author: Jeff W
E-Mail: [e-mail]
Feedback: Yes please. Tell me anything. Was is good, bad, or what.
Distribution: Please ask and I'll say yes.
Summary: This story dosn't involve Buffy and Co. directly although they
do make apperances. The main character is Amy Madison from 'The Witch'
and 'Bewitched, Bothered, and Bewildered' which are both being aired
this week on WB. But don't worry my next story will have the regular
crew.
Spoilers: The Witch.
Rating: PG
Time line: After Whe Witch. Sometime before Prophecy Girl.
Disclaimer: Most of the characters in this story belong to Joss Wheadon
ect. The only characters I can claim are Toni, Kyle and Marlene.

*********************
School Spirits.   Part 5

Chapter 6:

Friday 7:05 a.m.

  "Amy time to get up sweetheart or you'll be late for school."
  Amy opened her eyes enough to see her dad standing in the door
drinking a cup of coffee. All she could manage was to mumble something.
  "Come on now. Get up."
  After their conversation with Carl, Kyle and Toni had dropped her
off.   But it had still been very late by the time she got to bed. She
would pay for it today.
  Amy managed to throw back the covers and sit up in bed. As she reached
for her robe Jericho ran into the room and jumped onto the bed. The
presence of the cat gave Amy enough of a boost in energy to manage to
standup and put on her robe.
  Just then the phone rang. Her father walked up the hall to his room to
pick it up. "Hello." She heard him say. "Hi Connie."
  What could Marlene's mom want now thought Amy.
  As she walked to the door of her room Amy listened but could not make
out anything that was being said.
  Stepping into the hall she heard him say "I will. As soon as I can."
Then he hung up the phone.
  As soon as she saw his face Amy knew something was wrong.
  "What's the matter Daddy?" She asked.
  He looked at her for a second then said. "It's Marlene. She's in the
Hospital."


  When Amy and her father arrived at the hospital twenty minutes later
they found Connie Schultz standing outside Marlene's room.
  "How is she." Kevin Madison asked.
  "She just woke up. The doctor's with her now."
  "That's good news."
  "What happened?" Ask Amy.
  "Nobody's sure." Said Mrs. Schultz. "Everything was completely normal
last night. Then this morning when we got up Marlene's not in her bed.
We looked all over the house, no sign. Then somebody looked outback and
there she was. Bleeding and unconscious. We called an ambulance and the
police. We've been here since before seven."
  "Until ten minutes ago she was still unconscious, so no one has had a
chance to talk to her."
  "What do the police say?" Asked Amy.
  "They haven't talked to her yet but, they seem to think this is
related to the animal attacks over the last few weeks. Maybe some pack
of wild dogs."
  Amy went cold. She suspected that somehow Susan Littledeer had to be
involved. But why Marlene. Was it just coincidence or was this some kind
of message to Amy. She would have to ask Carl. He'll know what to do.
Amy thought to herself. But even though she refused to accept it, deep
in her heart she knows what needs to be done.

  By 10:00 a.m. Amy's dad had dropped her off at school. When she
finally gotten to talk to her, Marlene had confirmed her fears.
Something during the night had woken her up, but she wasn't sure of the
time. She couldn't explain why but for some reason she had to go
outside. Once outside she remembered some huge dog like creature
attacked her. At some point she must have hit her head and been knocked
out.
  Other than the mild concussion, she had a few cuts, scratches and
bites. Nothing major but since there was an unknown dog involved she
would need rabies shots.
  "Poor girl." Toni said as she and Amy sat outside trying to eat
lunch.   "I here that those shots can be very painful."
  Amy could only nod.
  "Do you think that you know who is behind this?"
  Amy just looked up from her food and gave Toni a piercing stare.
  "Yeah." Toni said. "Who else could it be. What are we going to do?"
  Amy didn't reply at first. Then when she did Toni could barely here
when she said, "What we have to. What I have to."

  The rest of the day was nearly torture for Amy. She could feel the
same sense of  foreboding that she had experienced over the last few
days returning to a place deep inside. It started out small at first.
But as the afternoon wore on it continued to build.
  Having learned all she had over the last days Amy could still not
exactly describe her feelings any better than she could before.
  That wasn't totally true. She knew that it felt wrong.
  Amy was sitting in her last class of the day unable to concentrate at
all. When suddenly she let out a slight gasp as she felt something tear
through her soul.
  For a moment all she could do was hold on to the desk because the room
was spinning. Once the room settled down she realized that she felt
chilled to her core, and she had broken out in a cold sweat.
  Amy looked to Toni sitting next to her staring back. She could see her
lips move but couldn't make out any words. All she could hear was the
sound of blood rushing in her ears.
  Miss Phelps must have noticed something was wrong because she was now
standing next to her speaking. But Amy couldn't make out her words
either. Miss Phelps said something to Toni who a moment later appeared
next to her and trying to help her stand.
  Amy stood on shaky legs, and with Toni's help made it into the
hallway.
  Amy knew her hearing was finally beginning to return when she heard
Toni say. "Are you alright?"
  Amy managed to weakly say, "I'll be alright in a minute."
  Soon Amy felt her strength beginning to return.
  "Where are we going?" She asked.
  "I'm taking you to the nurse." Toni replied.
  "That's okay just let me sit for a moment and I think I'll be okay."
  Toni led Amy to some chairs and they sat down.
  "What happened back there?" She asked.
  "It's hard to describe. Almost like a cold knife stabbed through me."
Amy was quite for another moment then she said,  "Oh God. I bet Susan
did something. From what I've read sometimes people like me can feel it
when ever somebody nearby uses powerful magic. That's what it must have
been. And by the feel of it I bet it was something very evil."
  Suddenly the doors near by burst open and a crush of people came
rushing through. There were policemen and paramedics with a gurney. They
rushed down the hallway and to the door leading downstairs that the Amy
and her friends had used the previous night.
  Amy and Toni looked at each other. The same thought on both of their
minds.
  Amy was the first to speak. "Carl."
  Amy stood up. Toni was up beside her and asked, "Are you ok to stand
now?"
  "I can manage. I need to know what happened down there."
  But when they reached the door there was a policeman standing there
who would not let them pass.
  After twenty minutes the door opened. The two paramedics were caring
the gurney. When they reached the top of the stairs the gurney sprung
legs and wheels. Then they continued towards the exit.
  As the paramedics pass them Amy had her worst fears confirmed. The
bloody person on the gurney with the oxygen mask strapped on his face
was Carl.
  Amy felt her spirit sink. Things couldn't possibly get any worse she
thought.
  Then she looked up and realized that things were worse. On the other
side of the hallway was Susan Littledeer standing there looking directly
at Amy with a triumphant smile on her face.
  Now Amy realized that not only had things gotten worse. They were
going to get a lot worse unless she could do something about it.
  But before she could confront Littledeer, she had to confront her
worst fears. That meant confronting the ghost of her mother. And she
knew where to find this ghost. Locked in an old chest in the basement.



Chapter 7
Friday 3:45 p.m.


  Despite the voice in her head screaming to get away from here, Amy
finally stepped into the room and up to the chest. She reached into the
pocket of her jeans and pulled out a key. The key that she had kept with
her these last months.
  Amy had to step to one side to allow enough light onto the lock so she
could use the key to unlock the case. It turned easily. And with a click
that sounded deafening she knew that the lock was open. Removing the key
from the lock Amy replaced it in her pocket and slowly opened the chest.
When nothing jumped out of the at her, Amy felt the tension drain from
her body and said. "See. That wasn't so tough was it?
  "Why didn't I bring a flashlight?" Said Amy as she knelt in front of
the chest. When  suddenly from her right she saw something leap at her.
As she fell backwards all she could do, was scream.
  The scream was a short one. And as her butt hit the floor Amy started
to scoot away. When after a moment nothing else happened she stopped.
  Then she heard it.
  "Meeeoooow"
  Amy began to laugh then said, "Jericho! Don't jump at me like that.
>From the cat she got the feeling that he hadn't intended to scare her
but thought her reaction was mildly amusing.
  Amy stood up and dusted herself off. Then she walked over to the chest
and pulled it more into the light.
  The inside was much like she remembered it from packing it all up.
There were several old leather bound books. And a couple of items that
looked like old scrolls. The tools of a trade that apparently she was
predestined to fulfil. And if Carl was correct the only thing standing
between the town of Sunnydale and destruction, she would have to learn
quickly.
  Amy grabbed the scrolls and four of the books and went upstairs to her
bedroom.
  Once in her bedroom Amy put the book on her desk. Then she picked up
the phone and called the hospital to talk to Marlene.
  Marlene said that she was feeling better but still a bit sore. The
doctor thought she could go home tomorrow.
  Amy talked to her for a while trying to cheer her up by filling her in
on the details of the day. It felt good to act like a normal teenager
again. Even if it was only for a while.
  Then just as before she was ready to hang up Marlene said. "Guess who
visited me today?"
  "I don't know. Who?"
  "That weird Librarian Mr. Giles and that Buffy girl."
  "What did they want?"
  "They just wanted to know how I was feeling. They were real nice.
Especially Buffy. It's too bad she is so unpopular."
  "Is that all they wanted?"
  "They did ask a lot of questions about what happened last night."
  "And what did you tell them?"
  "Same thing I told you. That I didn't remember much."
  Then Marlene said, "Oh, the nurse is here. Probably wants to take my
temperature or give me a shot. I got to go now. Bu-Bye."
  "Bye Marlene."
  After hanging up with Marlene Amy thought about what to do next. She
would need to study the books and practice what she learned. Given his
experience with her mother she doubted that her father would be very
pleased if he discovered what she was doing. She hated keeping secrets
from him but at the current point in time she could see no other way.
  So she needed someplace to go. Then she remembered that Toni had said
that her parents were going to be out of town for the weekend. Perfect
Amy thought.
  Amy called Toni who was almost too eager for Amy to come over to
practice.
  Amy then called her father at work. He wasn't in his office to answer
so she left a message on his voice mail explaining that she was going to
Toni's to spend the night.
  Amy had just finished packing what she needed when she heard a car
drive up and honk it's horn. She took a quick look outside and saw it
was Toni in her mothers car.
Quickly she gathered up her things. Jericho was waiting by the door for
her. She put the backpack filled with cloths and books over one
shoulder. Then she picked up the cat, and headed out the door.

  The next 48 hours passed very quickly. Amy was amazed as to how
quickly she absorbed the books. She couldn't explain it but on some
level of her psyche it all made a certain sense. The more she worked
with the magic the more aware she became of the astral dimension.
Although the entire experience wasn't with out it bumps. When Toni first
saw the books she looked through them.
  "What's the deal here." Toni said. "There's nothing in these books."
"Of course there is." Amy replied. They're full of writing's an
drawings."
  Amy took one of the books and opened it to a description of a plant
growth spell and said. "See?"
  "See what?"
  "The writing and diagram." Amy said.
  "I don't see anything. Maybe I need a pair of X-ray glasses."
  "That must be it." Amy said. "These books are magical. And they must
be written in a way that only allows a person with strong astral
connections to read them. Cool."
  Then there was the incident that happened on Saturday afternoon. Amy
was trying to practice a create fire spell. Toni was holding an old
towel that Amy was trying to catch on fire. Something went wrong because
Toni's pants started to burn. Fortunately the garden hose was already
near by in case of just such an emergency. As soon as she realized what
was happening Amy grabbed the hose and began to spray down Toni's pants,
and the fire was quickly put out before any damage could be done.
  After the emergency was over Amy began to laugh at the image of first
Toni dancing around with her pants on fire. And now standing there with
one of her legs dripping wet.
  "What's so funny?" Toni said.
  "You are. If you could have seen you're self jumping around. It was
like something from the Three Stooges."
  "Oh yeah." Said Toni. "Well let's see if you think this is so
funny."   Then Toni grabbed the hose and turned it on Amy.
  Amy shrieked as the cold water hit her. But the screams were at first
interrupted then totally replaced by laughter.
  Soon they were both just sitting on the patio laughing
uncontrollably.   The laughter lasted for several minutes.


*******************
  End of Part 5



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: [e-mail] (Charity C. T.)
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Chronicles (17/?)
Date: 15 Jun 1998 01:35:36 -0700

Name: The Chronicles of the White Knight #17 Telling Tales
Author: Taygeta
Address: [e-mail]
Feedback: Please!
Uses in anything: Sure, but tell me first.
Spoiler: Not really, might have mentioned a past episode.
Disclaimer: The Buffy characters portrayed in this story and any other
references to Buffy the Vampire Slayer are the property of its creater
Joss Whedon, and its owners Mutant Enemy productions, Kuzui Productions,
Sandollar Productions, and 20th Century Fox.
Rating: PG

***************************
Chronicles of the White Knight
#17 Telling Tales
By: Taygeta

    "àAnd thatàis the end of 'The Turtles vs. the World,'" Xander
announced in such a mockery of a serious voice that everyone had to laugh
as the bell rang in the background.

    "That wasàinteresting," Mrs. Roslyn critiqued hesitantly as she
scribbled on her notebook and the class began to leave, "Xander, please
stay afteràI'd like to talk to you, about youràumà"

    "Literary masterpiece?" he finished for her as the students
exiting laughed all over again.

    "I wouldn't exactly use the wordàmasterpiece to describe your
work, Xander," Mrs. Roslyn said with a smile as the good-looking
dark-haired student stood in front of her desk.  "You have great
potential, dear, I know.  I've seen many of your half-thought essays from
Ms. Simpkins, and despite their lack of content and effort, I saw that
you had latent talent.  Which is why I let you join my creative writing
classàto turn the latent into the obvious, but at the moment things are
coming to Ds and Cs.  That might be good enough for you, but I won't let
you settle for that."

    "Mrs. Roslyn, that's very kind of you to say that, but I don't
think I can cut it as a writeràyou must have realized that I only came to
the class to get out of Simpkins," he replied with a half-grin.

    The woman with her spectacles and her peppered hair, smiled
slightly before retorting,  "I got the feeling that that's what you were
saying to everyone, but I think it's more than that.  It's a simple idea,
and you must embrace that idea, before you can voice it to the world, I
know.  I'll give you a second chance on this assignment, Xander, it'll be
due next week on my desk."

    He sighed in thought as he wondered what he was going to write
about, "Mrs. Roslyn, what do I -"

    "Anything you want, dear, as long as it's in good taste," she
said knowing exactly what he was going to say, "Here's a suggestion if
you should come upon writer's block.  Use what you know, let your
feelings flow from your fingertips.  Do you understand?"

    Xander shifted his backpack in thought and replied, "I - I think
so, but I don't know if it's going to help me."

    "Try," she said with a sigh as he neared the door, "I know it's a
clichΘ, but you won't know until you try."

    As he exited her classroom, not too far away, Buffy and Willow
were looking on with worried expressions.  Finally the redhead looked at
her friend with a sigh and said in a firm tone, "You have to tell him,
Buffy, there's no way I'm going to help you if you don't tell him."

    "YeahàI know Will," she said as she saw her boyfriend's figure
faded out of sight, "I just hope that he can understand."

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

    Buffy approached Xander from behind as he walked across the quad,
tapped his shoulder lightly with a soft, "Hey," and the kissed him on the
cheek.

    He turned to her with a smile, "Hey, yourself, where were you in
history?  Will and I saved you a spot."

    "IàuhàI was talking to Giles," she said, as she remembered the
frozen expression of her Watcher's face when she told him about her wants
to initiate the curse.  She just hoped that this next attempt to explain
contained far less wide-eyed staring.

    " 'Bout what?" he asked glancing at her and then gave her a look
and a sigh, "Do we have to deal with more vampiresàagain?"

    She hesitated before responding slowly, "Sort ofàumàXander,
there's something I have to tell youà"

_____________________________________________________________________
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Get completely free e-mail from Juno at http://www.juno.com
Or call Juno at (800) 654-JUNO [654-5866]



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: [e-mail]
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Broken Bonds (Part 9)
Date: 15 Jun 1998 17:52:30 -0400

Title:  Broken Bonds (Part 9)
Author:  Northlight
email:  [e-mail]
Thanks:  Leslie
Summary:  Giles disapears and bad things start to happen.
Previous Parts:  "http://www.geocities.com/Area51/Lair/7493/index.html"
Disclaimer:  They aren't mine.

    Angel had to consciously restrain himself from heading back into the
library and ripping Tyler's throat out as he took in Buffy's trembling
form.  He hadn't seen Buffy so angry in all the time that he had known
her, and it worried him to see her so very upset.

    He pulled her into his arms in front of the school and drew her towards
him.  Angel waited patiently as Buffy angrily mumbled on about Tyler
against his chest.  When she finally fell silent, Angel gave into his
curiosity to know what exactly had happened since he had last seen her.

    Buffy pulled herself out of his arms at his question and began to
pace.  "That's Nathaniel Tyler, he claims that he's my temporary
Watcher."  Angel's eyebrows raised at her comment, but he remained
silent, letting her finish.  "There's not much else to tell really -- he
creeps me out, Willow told me that he's lied about Giles heading back to
England, he tried to get rid of Willow, and he attacked you."  Buffy
glanced towards Angel. "Actually, I was hoping that you'd have some
information about what's going on around here."

    Angel frowned slightly.  "I was hoping that Giles would be able to
answer that same question.  Things have been remarkably quiet around
here... as if everything is frightened..." Angel trailed off, trying to
find the words to express his sense of uneasiness.  Finally, he gave up
on that and settled for a warning.  "Something big is happening."

    Buffy nodded, her eyes shadowed.  "I know."

    She moved back into Angel's arms and they stood together, taking what
strength they could from the other.

***

    Giles was pacing, his hands absently riffling through the sheets which
Simon had provided him with.  'Nathaniel Tyler -- of everyone that they
could have sent, why him?!'  A grimace of distaste twisted Giles' mouth
at the thought of the other man.

    In all the years that he had known Tyler, Giles had always detested the
man.  Not that he had ever shown that, of course.  Giles hadn't ever
been able to determine with any certainty what it was about Tyler that
made him so repulsive -- there was just something about the man that
annoyed him to no end.

    And now, he was Buffy's Watcher.

    And worse yet, Giles didn't know what side of the split that Tyler had
landed on.  Having Tyler anywhere near Buffy in normal circumstances
would have worried Giles, but in his current situation, the unease was
nearly unbearable.

    Giles cast a quick glance around the dingy motel room which Simon had
found for him, and felt the sudden need to get out.  "I've wasted enough
time, already!" Giles muttered, his mind racing ahead to explore his
possible actions.  "It's time to start acting!"

***

    Tyler stood at the library windows, glaring down at the embracing
couple.  The Slayer and a vampire, of all things!

    The girl was nothing like he had expected a Slayer to be.  Most of them
were cut off from family and friends, allowing them to concentrate on
their duty -- while at the same time leaving them dependant on their
Watchers.  That was something Tyler had been more than ready to use to
his advantage.

    Buffy wasn't about to comply to his view of Slayers.  She was
independent, and she had friends to help her while Rupert was gone.

    'Friends!' Tyler thought in mild disgust.  'What was Rupert thinking,
allowing the girl to have friends involved in Slayer business -- and
that damned *vampire*!'  Tyler's teeth gnashed at the thought of what he
would have to put up with during his stint as Buffy's Watcher.

    'Not for long, though.'  The thought sent a brief smile to his face.
Things were about to change around Sunnydale.


End Part 9



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: _-Sun-_ <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Charlotte Sometimes (Part 31)
Date: 15 Jun 1998 17:38:24 -0700

Charlotte Sometimes (Part 31)


    She grasped his hand as tight as she could to keep from falling, "Tell
them" She pleaded, out of her control, and began sobbing yet again.
"P-please you, you have to!" She cried.

    Desiree began to stand, listening to her frantic cell mate. She barely
got to her feet when she heard the noise. She arched her broken body to
see what was happening, trying to see through the tiny hole of a window
that was atop the door.
    "Drusilla?" She whispered, still staring at the doorway

~

    "Shhh... I'll tell them Drusilla" Angelus smiled, looking down at her
tear streaked face.
 In all fairness towards himself - he hadn't thought the towns local
idiots would claim her a witch. He merely thought to hurt her, from the
inside. Never had he meant for her to be beaten.

    Still, the smell of her blood was something he would not soon forget

~

    "Drusilla!" Desiree hissed, trying to get her meaning across.
    She wanted to scream. She wanted to grab Drusilla and throw her back
towards the ground, and force her mouth to still.
    But fear quickly froze her, staring at the door, listening to the men
walk down the hallway.

    They may not come in. They may be coming for another girl. There was an
endless amount of witches here it seemed, what were the chances of them
coming in this particular cell?

~

    Drusilla nodded franticly, her feet stumbling as she quickened to get a
grip on the rocks below.
    "Tell them" She cried, screaming, yelling at him to plead with the
jury. To tell the men she was a god loving catholic.
    To tell them not to hurt her...

~

    Desiree listened intently, blocking out the sound of Drusilla and her
visitor, listening to the sound of the key as the men stopped outside
their room.
    Directly outside, she watched the tops of their hats sway outside the
window.

    In her mind she grabbed Drusilla to the ground. In her mind she willed
Drusilla to fall fast asleep with her, so the men would never know.
They'd come in, look at the sleeping girls, and leave.
    But in reality nothing happened. In reality she never moved. She never
uttered a word. Though she turned.

~

    Shock flooded Drusilla's system as the door slammed open hitting the
opposite wall.
    She turned her head around to view the dark men standing in the
doorway, just standing, silently beckoning her.
    Her hands were the first to let go, as her mind screamed at her to get
away from the window. To not let them see him. To see she'd been with
people from the outside, people sent to help her.
    But in her confusion her feet kicked the rocks which held her balance,
and she flew tumbling down to the ground, though not more than two to
three feet from the ground, she feel with a hard thud, her head hitting
the pole in the middle of the room.
Successfully knocking her out within the seconds it took her to look
back up to see Angelus's growling features.



--
_-SuN-_

SD - Http://home.earthlink.net/~kbleyle/SD/index.html

    Daylight licked me into shape, I must have been asleep for
days. And moving lips to breathe her name, I opened up my eyes
And found myself alone alone, Alone above a raging sea
That stole the only girl I loved, And drowned her deep inside
of me (The Cure)

_ - _Spikette _ Dru's Dolly - Mercenary_ - _
  _ - _ Head Dominatrix in the Evil _ - _
_ - _   Plan For World Domination, _ - _
  _ - _ With Chains and Stuff _ - _



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: _-Sun-_ <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Charlotte Sometimes (Part 32)
Date: 15 Jun 1998 17:38:58 -0700

Charlotte Sometimes (part 32)

    It took him a blink of an eye to break the bars in to pieces and jump
through the opening.
    The men came at him with their large wooden crosses. Chanting some
stupid words of riddance.
    Angelus flinched, and rolled his eyes. But what did he expect? He _was_
breaking into a witch pit.

    The first man to come at him was murmuring some stupid hymn that
Angelus couldn't quite catch because he was to busy trying to ignore his
instincts as they screamed for him to flee.
    But there was no way he was leaving Drusilla here to die, or be hurt by
these morons. He'd claimed first dibs after all.

    The man finally came within arms reach and Angelus took full vantage.
Grabbing his wrist, he gazed into mans eyes coldly before ripping the
bone backwards breaking the wrist in more than a couple places.

    He screamed, a girlish annoying-some sound and Angelus quickly slipped
his hand around to snap the mans neck.

~

    "Help!" The other man called out the window "Guards!" he was shouting
as he stood in the door way, holding his large wooden cross in front of
him. "REBEL!" He shouted loudly.
    His hand began to shake as the intruder came after him. He was scared,
and as good as the idea of running away appealed to him, he continued to
maintain his stature, as the murder continued after him. He began to
scream louder for more guards.

~

    Angelus flinched for the second time this night. But not from the cross
the man was holding. It came from the girl behind him. She was screaming
endlessly.
He turned back at her sharply only exciting the scared girl more so as
her high pitch scream continued, yelling piercingly random insults.
'Demon' 'Satan' 'God save me' and such.

    But he had one important matter to take care of before the annoying
witch.

    Angelus darted at the man, slamming the door shut, and successfully
jamming it into the wall, enslaving the catholic in the room.
    He took one look at the screaming girl, out of pure whimsy to frighten
her more, before his features changed yet again, and he bared the mans
neck.
    Glaring at poor Desiree his fangs snapped around the mans neck.

~

    Drusilla's mind came awake to the sound of harsh screams.
    Her first instinct was to shut up the noise. That if someone came into
the room to stop her from screaming out, they'd notice herself awake,
and come to take her back into their tortures.
    But as her eyes fluttered awake she noticed the body of the guard next
to her. There was a sickening peace at knowing a man who'd caused her
and so many others terrible pain was gone. The next image her mind saw
told her that she was cruelly wrong.

~

    Angelus advanced on the scared girl slowly at first, enjoying the
thrill of her cries and pleas, then in a split second captured her head
with his hands, straddling her hips around him, easily pinning her down.
    It never even occurred to him that the poor thing wasn't able to run.
That the men had done so much damage to her body she could barely stand.
    He locked her eyes to his, starring into them, wondering what her last
thoughts were.
    Being the nice guy that he was he gave her a precious moment to make
her peace with whomever she needed to be at rest with before he took
from her the one thing she needed to survive....


--
_-SuN-_

SD - Http://home.earthlink.net/~kbleyle/SD/index.html

    Daylight licked me into shape, I must have been asleep for
days. And moving lips to breathe her name, I opened up my eyes
And found myself alone alone, Alone above a raging sea
That stole the only girl I loved, And drowned her deep inside
of me (The Cure)

_ - _Spikette _ Dru's Dolly - Mercenary_ - _
  _ - _ Head Dominatrix in the Evil _ - _
_ - _   Plan For World Domination, _ - _
  _ - _ With Chains and Stuff _ - _



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: _-Sun-_ <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Charlotte Sometimes (Part 33)
Date: 15 Jun 1998 17:57:47 -0700

Charlotte Sometimes (Part 33)


    Drusilla stared up in horror at the picture her mind was showing her.
    Another vision she told herself. Another deceitful image!
    Angelus isn't a demon! He isn't the devil! It's a vision! It's false!

She watched with sickening fascination as he let go of her friend and
turned to face her.
A vision she cried. Her own mind was betraying her! Angelus was good!
Pure!
His face remained that of Satan himself as he glided gallantly towards
her body.

    The moment his cool hands touched her face she screamed.
    Her hands flew up at his face.
    Vision's can't touch. They can't harm you!
    He was real! This was real and he was evil....

    She hit him away, her hand barely grazing his lips but the chains
connected solidly with his cheek.
    Drusilla scrambled to her feet, her wounded foot hit the ground as she
leaped to get away. The shocking pain coursed through her body, and her
knees hit the ground...

~

    Angelus didn't move towards her, even though he heard the extra guards
running down the hall. He let Drusilla delude herself into thinking she
could run from him.
    He laughed as her body snapped backwards from her efforts. The chains
doing their job to keep her in place.

    Angelus willed his face to take on his human guise and he walked
towards her. "They're coming" He said simply, cocking his head in
curiosity as she screamed for them to hurry. She deceived herself into
thinking that they'd believe her story. That'd they'd believe a demon
had come and killed everyone in the room, yet aloud her to live

She screamed again, a high pitched squealing noise.

    He snapped at her then, grabbing her chin to face him, squeezing on the
sides of her jaws just tight enough so that it pained her to move.
It silenced her "Shut up!" he screamed at her, successfully getting her
attention.
"They will come in here, and they will see you! You're surrounded by
three dead bodies Drusilla! You think they'll believe the witch when she
say's another demon did it?"
    Tears fell from her eyes as she closed her lashes in pain.
    Angelus looked back towards the door he listened for a moment as the
men began to slam up against the jammed door in an attempt to open it.

~

    "Come with me Drusilla" His tone had changed, it was softer now, and
she painfully opened her eyes. "I'll take you out of here, where they'll
not hurt you" He promised.

    His face sickened her. How dare he look like that? How dare he use the
eyes of her love! How dare he talk to her as though he ever cared for
her.
    But his words sang to her.
    He could take her away. Get her out of this pit. They'd never believe
her... They might... But what if they didn't?
    Ever so gradually she felt his grip on her jaw diminish, until there
was hardly any pain coming from him.
    She looked into his pleaded eyes. As they begged for her to trust him.
Begged for Drusilla to let him take her away from this place.

    Drusilla willed her body to relax, as she fell flat against the damp
ground.
    He took this as a yes of course, that she would go with him. Absently
she felt Angelus's hands moving down her body, as he grasped the chains
that held her. There was a sharp pain that made her flinch, and then
there was no pressure, and she knew he'd ripped the chains right off her
wrist.
    Drusilla's head bobbed up towards the door as the men pounded on the
door. It was breaking. It would be open soon.

    But it didn't matter now. She was dead either way. Angelus could save
her from the horrors of this place, but who would save her from him? Not
Papa, or Mother, and certainly not --

    Drusilla's memory snapped awake as she remembered something he'd left
for her. This thing that told her to go on, and to help her. The one
person she'd forgotten during this whole ordeal...
    Lydia!





--
_-SuN-_

SD - Http://home.earthlink.net/~kbleyle/SD/index.html

    Daylight licked me into shape, I must have been asleep for
days. And moving lips to breathe her name, I opened up my eyes
And found myself alone alone, Alone above a raging sea
That stole the only girl I loved, And drowned her deep inside
of me (The Cure)

_ - _Spikette _ Dru's Dolly - Mercenary_ - _
  _ - _ Head Dominatrix in the Evil _ - _
_ - _   Plan For World Domination, _ - _
  _ - _ With Chains and Stuff _ - _



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: [e-mail]
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Monsters (1/1)
Date: 15 Jun 1998 23:10:53 -0400

Title:       Monsters
Author:      Northlight
email:       [e-mail]
Summary:     Willow thinks about life in Sunnydale.
Disclaimer:  They aren't mine.

    ~Another day survived~ Willow thought with a small smile, offering up a
quick prayer of thanks as she efficiently battled her way through the
pile of dirty dishes stacked next to the sink.

    There had been something of a close call, with that demon possessed
postal worker, but Buffy had gotten things under control before the body
count made it into double digits.  Of course, she hadn't managed to
quite get things all wrapped up until Willow had received the shock of
having her mail man try to eat her -- but all considered, it was a good
day.

    And Willow was thankful for any hint of normalcy that she got in her
day, no matter how long that it lasted.  She adored those moments not
only because of the lack of terror and threat to the lives of those she
cared for, but also because it gave her a chance to breath normally.  ~I
think I'm getting too old for this business~ Willow thought wryly.

    She had spent all of her life in Sunnydale save for the occasional trip
beyond the borders of their small town.  And almost half of that life
had passed fighting vampires and miscellaneous monsters at the side of
the Slayer.

    Sometimes, thinking back over the terrors that their small band had
encountered over the years, Willow was amazed that she was still sane.
~Or alive~  But she had prevailed.

    She had grown up, gotten the best education she could, found a job,
gotten married, all while staying on the lookout for any of the dangers
that sprang from the Hellmouth.  ~And it's all turned out pretty well...
After everything we've been through, everything is all right.~

    Despite her fear, Willow had never abandoned Buffy.  The Slayer needed
her friends, and knowing how alone Buffy was already, Willow had never
even thought of leaving the dangerous and oftentimes deadly town.

    Willow had recognized the monsters that walked their world, and she
couldn't close her eyes to that.  Even had she been willing to leave
Sunnydale and Buffy behind, that knowledge would never have left her.
She would never have felt truly safe, but here, at the side of her
friends, at least she was doing something to fight back those monsters.

    "Mommy?" a small voice called from the doorway.

    Willow turned to see her daughter looking at her with wide, frightened
eyes, her favorite teddy bear clutched to her small body.  "What is it,
honey?" Willow asked gently, scooping the girl into her arms.

    "There's a monster under my bed!" the child whimpered.

    "Mommy will take care of everything," Willow smiled reassuringly and
settled her daughter back on the ground.  "Now why don't you go talk to
daddy and I'll go take care of the monster so that you can get back to
bed, ok?"

    Willow shooed her daughter towards the living room.  ~Bed monster...~
Willow thought, considering her options.

    Willow reached towards a drawer and quickly riffled through it.
~Stakes-- no.  Holy water -- no.  Where is it anyway?  Peanut butter?
No, that was for the closet monster...  Ah!  Here we go!~

    For a moment, Willow let herself smile at the seeming absurdity of the
situation.  ~I'll bet we're the only parents who take exorcising bed
monsters seriously...~

    Then, Willow drew herself back to the matter at hand and went to chase
away the monsters.

End

http://www.geocities.com/Area51/Lair/7493/index.html



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: _-Sun-_ <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Charlotte Sometimes (part 34)
Date: 16 Jun 1998 03:01:46 -0700

Charlotte Sometimes (part 34)

    He gathered Drusilla's wounded body into his arms, and she didn't miss
the amount of care he took when placing her securely in his arms. Pain
shot through her body causing her flinched under his grasp, but she was
sure it could have been worse.
He jumped with her out that tiny window. How he managed to get the both
of them out that small opening didn't matter anymore. Because she could
feel him running, and could feel the clean air hitting her senses. The
free air.

    Drusilla looked around from her vantage point of his arms to see where
they were. It was dark to tell, and the road soon became a dizzy blur.
She could however see Angelus. His eyes blazing as she felt the mist of
tree's coming around them.
    His eyes moved to look down at her, and immediately she panicked.

    He had already killed 3 people. In cold blood. He was a demon! A
monster inside her love!
    Fumbling she managed to grab the cross around her neck thankful she
still had it, and with few regrets she shoved it at the demon's
forehead.

~

    Pain shot through his body.
Pain like fire, coursing though his nerves, smoking his skin and knowing
instantly who's fault it was he threw Drusilla to the ground. Ready to
kill the stupid bitch as she fell under his feet - stunned for a moment
then began scrambling away, crawling on her hands and knee's and still
managing to fall onto her stomach.

    Angelus lashed out at her, anger and fury building inside of him.
Raging at the defenseless and scared Drusilla.
He caught up to her easily - she hadn't gotten far, and moved to tower
over her. Whether she was aware of his presence or not he couldn't tell,
but he was sure she'd notice soon.
He lend over her small body and caught her waist on either side of his
hands, easily flipping her tiny body over, and pinned her underneath him
to the ground.

    He looked down into her frightened eyes, giving him a sense of
adrenaline to know without a doubt he was the cause of this fear. He was
curious at first from her shocked and scared expression - and remembered
that his game face was now on. He was about to hit her again when she
began to cry. Timidly she threw her head to the side, unable to gaze a
moment longer at this new hideous thing.

    He stared for a moment. The picture of her skin her perfect lips and
slender neck was too inviting. But the timid ring that radiated her told
him other wise.
    Angelus looked away, feeling remorse at hurting his love. Feeling
apologetic at *wanting* to frighten her.
Quickly he ripped the cross off her neck, without a glance to her
reddened eyes.
Perhaps she was a witch. She was sending sparks through him. Sending
unwanted feelings through his head. Unbidden desires, and he found he
couldn't hurt her now. Not here at least. Picking her back up he quickly
ran the rest of the way, not wanting another such encounter.

~


    She could see the small cottage in her thoughts, See the small fire,
and the white linen blankets and wondered what he had planed.
In her head he was her Angel, holding her, rescuing her. It was easier
to believe this way, easier to see his face. True face.
    His perfect skin, yes - it almost shown with it's brilliance. His hair
was amazing as he looked at her, tossing it to the side with a snap of
his neck. It looked... alive such as an entity of it's own. So full, so
brilliant, and his voice again. Saying that they were safe. That she was
safe with him.

    The door was unlocked as he carried her to the bedroom, though she
stilled, half dead on the edge of unconsciousness laying her down on the
soft white cushions. She wanted to remember to hate him. To see him and
be disgusted, but it was impossible to think such evil things.

~

    Keeping his thoughts full of pure intent was not the easiest thing to
do. her silent body withering in pain in his bed, fluttering her eyes to
stay awake.
    At least she wasn't screaming. If he had to listen to on more screaming
voice he just might kill her himself.

    She forced herself to stay awake. How odd, after all that's happened,
she should be sound asleep knowing she's safe. No. She wasn't safe and
she was very afraid. He could hardly blame her.
    "Drusilla?" he asked, wondering if in her hysteria she could hear him.

~

    The blood stopped flowing as he called her name. All went cold.
She looked up at him slowly. Terribly afraid of what she was going to
see when her eyes met his face, what was going to happen...
    "Calm down," He said simply, she shook her head, and began to cry again
soaking the pillows she lay apon.
    He came to sit next to her on the large bed,  reaching out to her,
avoiding her hands as they flew at him trying to pry his hands away from
her face, her neck, her body!
    She eventually gave up. Weak and exhausted her body fell limp against
the large bed looking up at him. "I'm not going to hurt you Dru."
    Every thought in her head began to bubble up in laughter. This demon
towering over her, promising her peace of mind and no more pain.

    "Rest." He was smiling, in an all out performance to get her to sleep
and heal. She was in still shock but she looked as though she'd be okay.
"And don't try to go away" He said grasping her lightly to get the
meaning in his voice through. "Alright?"
    He smiled as she fluttered her eyelashes to keep awake.
    But maybe he was wrong, she was in deep sleep within moments. Even her
heartbeat slowed...



--
_-SuN-_

SD - Http://home.earthlink.net/~kbleyle/SD/index.html

    Daylight licked me into shape, I must have been asleep for
days. And moving lips to breathe her name, I opened up my eyes
And found myself alone alone, Alone above a raging sea
That stole the only girl I loved, And drowned her deep inside
of me (The Cure)

_ - _Spikette _ Dru's Dolly - Mercenary_ - _
  _ - _ Head Dominatrix in the Evil _ - _
_ - _   Plan For World Domination, _ - _
  _ - _ With Chains and Stuff _ - _



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "Andrea Newbery" <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Repercussion, (11/16) by Andrea
Date: 16 Jun 1998 12:24:02 PDT

Title: Repercussions (11/16)
Author: Andrea
e-mail: [e-mail]
distribution: Sure, just tell me where.
disclaimers: Everybody in this story is the property of Joss Whedon,
Mutant Enemy, etc...
feedback: Please.
Thanks: to Rachel and Christine. And to Jenn for helping me figure out
what Hell was. :)


Angel's Apartment
August 21, 1998
6:00 p.m.

Cordelia gripped Xander's hand tightly as they walked down the short
flight of stairs to Angel's apartment. Her mind was swimming, half of
her unbelieving that he was actually going to go through with it, the
other half of her wanting to go run after Buffy, to force her to come
back and do this herself. She held onto Xander's hand tighter, feeling
the sweat between their palms, both of them terrified about what was
going to happen. She opened her mouth as they reached Angel's door,
wanting to tell him once more that Buffy was just crazed in her grief,
that she would feel bad about her words later. She looked over to
Xander, his face was closed, his mouth tight, she could practically see
him beating himself with Buffy's words.

Her mouth closed again without saying anything. Xander was too busy
hating himself to be able to see the truth in her words. She squeezed
his hand once more then let it go, reaching out to knock on the door,
hoping Whistler had lied to them and there would be no answer. Xander
shifted his weight from one foot to the other, his face pale and
slightly green. They could hear movement on the other side of the door,
and Cordelia was suddenly dizzy, realizing that this was really going to
happen. Xander was really going to Hell, she thought, her eyes filling
with tears as the door swung open.

Whistler stood there, smiling knowingly at them; "You made it. I wasn't
sure you'd show." Backing away from the door he gestured for them to
come in.

"I'm ready." Xander spoke loudly, his voice betraying both his fear and
his pain, "Let's do this."

"Whoa." Whistler held his hand up, walking further into the room, to
where a circle had been drawn on the floor, "This is Hell you're going
to. You gotta be ready."

"I am. Whatever it takes, I'll do it." Xander walked over to the circle
and stood in the center of it. Cordelia watched him from the doorway,
stunned by how fast he was trying to go she needed more time, she wasn't
ready to let him go. The tears spilled out onto her cheeks and she
turned to Whistler, her eyes begging him to slow things down. Taking
slow steps she walked into the room, moving close to the circle Xander
stood in, her eyes searching the room, taking in the candles that lit
the place, the paintings Angel had on his wall. She shuddered, trying
and failing to imagine Xander and Angel safely back in this room. She
reached out her hand to Xander, all plans for bravery forgotten. She
wanted to take him home. He smiled sadly at her, taking her hand shortly
and then releasing it.

Whistler was silent for a moment, going over to a desk in the corner of
the room. Then coming back he handed them both a sheet of paper, with
words written in both Latin and English. "You had the translation almost
totally right," He looked down at the paper he still held, then at them
again, his face serious, "'cept for the fact you would have brought
other demons back with Angel."

Cordelia caught her breath at his words, "Is it safe now?  I mean
will..." She stared, her heart in her throat until Whistler replied.

"Yes, Angel'll be comin' back, nothing else. But it's
still not gonna be easy." Whistler said, not looking at her, just
watching Xander carefully as he spoke.

"Whatever is?" Xander's voice was low, his face masked, Cordelia
couldn't stop shaking, knowing the pain he was feeling. Looking
defiantly at Whistler he motioned towards the circle, "I'm here. I'm
willing. What are we waiting for?" She grasped her hands together,
trying to calm their trembling. She was on the outside, unable to do
anything, she wasn't even sure if either of them remembered she was
there.

Whistler sighed, moving into the circle he slowly sat down on the floor.
"First some advice on hell."

Cordelia watched Whistler sitting so calmly on the floor, watched as
Xander sat down in front of him, her sniffles the only sound in the
room. She just stood there, not willing to participate any more in this
insanity, until Xander pleaded to her with his eyes. She glared at him,
but let herself sink to the floor also. Whistler smiled softly at her
then turned back to Xander.

"Hell is probably not gonna be what you were expecting." Whistler spoke
quickly picking up on Xander's rush, "It's a tricky place, things aren't
what they seem." He paused for a moment, then continued. "Anything you
feel bad about?"

Xander smirked at him, "Does betraying my best friends count?"

Whistler's face turned serious, "Nothing you'll see there is real.
Anything you feel bad about will be twisted, made into something worse.
Your gonna think everything is your fault. You gotta fight it, remember
that it's not real."

Cordelia sat there listening to his words, trying to remain quiet, but
her mind was picturing a repeat of Buffy's words made even worse. She
glanced at Xander, wanting to see his reaction, but other than a slight
twitch above his eye his face was blank. She turned back to Whistler,
wanting him to explain it more. "So, it's going to be Buffy and Willow
yelling at him in there? But, it's not really going to be them, just a
messed up version of what Xander feels?"

Cordelia narrowed her eyes at Whistler's look of surprise. Glancing at
her, he responded, "Pretty much." He returned his gaze to Xander. "It's
all taken from your mind. So you can stop it as soon as you realize it
isn't real. It's not easy. The guilt can get pretty bad in there, every
failing magnified, no points for good intentions."

Xander was nodding as Whistler spoke, his face closed in. When Whistler
stopped Xander turned to Cordelia, holding his hand out to her. She
crawled over to him, holding him tightly, he whispered in her ear as he
held her. "I can do this. Don't worry." Releasing her, he kissed her
lips softly and smiled at her. Setting his shoulders squarely he spoke
to Whistler, "Got it. Nothing's real. How will I know if Angel's real?"

"Cause he'll be torturing himself and not you." Whistler spoke quietly,
his hands busy lighting the candles that surrounded the circle. Xander
sat still, his eyes closed while Cordelia watched Whistler for a moment
then turned back to Xander. Her eyes darting back and forth between
them, her heart racing. When he was finished lighting the candles he
held his hand out to Xander. After staring at it like it would bite him,
Xander took it. Whistler nodded, and asked one last time, "Are you
sure?"

Cordelia waited for Xander's answer, knowing it would be yes, praying he
would say no. At Xander's terse yes, a sob escaped her, she caught it,
refusing to cry, needing to be strong for him. Whistler began chanting
softly in Latin, and glancing down at her page she slowly repeated the
English version, her voice in unison with Xanders. As Whistler finished
the last line of Latin she watched as they both jumped. Xander's eyes
flying open, his hand pulling free. Whistler smiled at his shock, "What?
You've never been bound before?"

Cordelia glared at him, her fear for Xander making her voice angry,
"Sorry Mister 'I'm-so-experienced-in-binding-cause-I'm-a-demon', but
we're not quite as into it as you obviously are." Her eyes were locked
onto Whistlers, waiting for his smile to disappear.

He looked at her and for a second she almost thought she saw respect in
his eyes, but it was quickly hidden. He turned back to Xander,
who was still sitting mutely, his face was full of fear. Speaking slowly
to him as if to a child, "We are bound now, twinned. That means if you
need help in there, you can call on my strength, my spirit. And when
you've got Angel and are coming back, you will feel me. That's how you
get out, you follow the feeling back to me. O.K.?"

Xander relaxed slowly, his features returning to their frozen state.
Silently he held his hand out to Whistler and when it was taken he
closed his eyes again. Cordelia just sat, unable to help, terrified
these would be the last moments she would ever spend with him. Whistler
sat with his head facing the floor, and then suddenly he stood, pulling
Xander to his feet. Standing there Whistler began chanting once again,
this time without any words for them to follow. The chant seemed to last
forever, and suddenly Cordelia noticed a shimmering beginning inside the
circle. It looked like the air was extremely hot, the shimmering
thickened, the air was like thick, she could see waves running through
it.

Xander was staring at the shimmering also, waiting for Whistler to
finish his chant, his face etched in fear. Cordelia held her breath,
waiting for something to happen. Whistler finished his chant, and
looking at Xander he motioned towards the shimmering, letting go of
Xander's hand. "You have to go through of your own free will."

Xander swallowed, looking to Cordelia for a quick moment, his eyes
telling her he loved her. She nodded, holding back her tears,
whispering. "I love you." He stepped towards the shimmering air, looking
to Whistler for reassurance.

"Just remember what I told ya kid. Nothing's real in there. You can't
let it get to you or you'll never get out." Whistler's face betrayed
only the slightest trepidation. He stepped away from Xander, standing on
the edge of the circle, "I've got ya. I'll know if you're in trouble.
And if you need it, you can use my strength."

Xander stood in front of the shimmering, his shoulders tense. Suddenly
he shook himself, and without glancing back he disappeared into the wavy
air. Cordelia stood stunned as the air returned to normal behind him, as
if he has just vanished into nothing. She sunk to the floor, sobbing
uncontrollably. Whistler appeared above her, his hand on her shoulder.
After a few minutes she regained control of her fear, speaking quietly
she questioned Whistler, "What do we do now?"

"We wait." Whistler spoke casually as he walked over to Angel's desk
once again. She stared disbelieving at his back, but then realizing that
he was right, everything was up to Xander now. Crossing her legs she sat
staring at the place he had disappeared.



______________________________________________________
Get Your Private, Free Email at http://www.hotmail.com



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: _-Sun-_ <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Charlotte Sometimes (part 35)
Date: 16 Jun 1998 14:06:55 -0700

Okay, here's one of those scenes that don't fit anywhere but need to be
said ;)
    As always YOU KNOW I DON'T OWN THEM, even though I forget to say it
once in a while, it's still true
    Not really an violence here, just a small ditty while I finish up the
next scene

Charlotte Sometimes (part 35)

    It felt as though she'd been awake for hours, staring in utter horror
at the thing laying next to her. Paralyzing her in fear of it. She could
glare. Only watch him and try not to breathe, taking all her courage not
to scream and try to run. It wouldn't work she knew, screaming would
wake him. And running would excite him. So she stared, gazing into the
handsome face of the peaceful beast sleeping next to her.
    Not breathing, not moving. He wasn't dead, in the sense at least. That
she knew without a doubt.
    To think! The last time she'd been here - with him. She'd wanted to
know him, wanting to love him.
    Now look what she'd done.
    He killed them. Her family, the priests, Desiree... He must have. This
thing! This evil entity inside this poor man. Now a demon.
    This poor person inside, dying inside. Possessed!

    A demon... She heard inside her head like an echo. A demon before it
showed her another sight. The sun - full of radiance as it flashed
before her eyes, the room flooded with it's bright light. It could have
been a serene image after her ordeal if it weren't for the screams. Loud
unbearable shrieks and cries. It took precious moments when she realized
they were coming from her. Her hands where on fire, the room, flooded in
light, and then nothing. And then ashes. Ashes covering the sun. Ashes
covering her body. No, Ashes left of her body. Ashes everywhere.

    The vision was over as soon as it'd appeared but it left her with a
small sense of whimsy.


--
_-SuN-_

SD - Http://home.earthlink.net/~kbleyle/SD/index.html

    Daylight licked me into shape, I must have been asleep for
days. And moving lips to breathe her name, I opened up my eyes
And found myself alone alone, Alone above a raging sea
That stole the only girl I loved, And drowned her deep inside
of me (The Cure)

_ - _Spikette _ Dru's Dolly - Mercenary_ - _
  _ - _ Head Dominatrix in the Evil _ - _
_ - _   Plan For World Domination, _ - _
  _ - _ With Chains and Stuff _ - _



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Hell (7/7)
Date: 16 Jun 1998 16:05:04 EDT

"Hell" 7/7
by Jaclyn Amy

TITLE: Hell
AUTHOR: Jaclyn [e-mail]
DISCLAIMER: I do not own any of the characters from Buffy the Vampire Sla=
yer.=0AThey belong to Joss Wheden, Mutant Enemy, 20th Century Fox, etc.
RATING: PG-13
WARNING: Some of the scenes have some gory violence. If you don=92t like =
that=0Asort of thing, don=92t read this.
SPOILERS: None.
SUMMARY: This takes place immediately after Becoming Parts 1 and 2. It=92=
s=0Apretty much my own episode after this. Enjoy!
DISTRIBUTION: Ask me first.
FEEDBACK: Please!
AUTHOR=92S NOTE: I have finals to study for, so these will probably come =
out=0Asparatically.
***
=09It was the night of Buffy=92s wake. Angel just stood at the door of th=
e funeral=0Aparlor waiting for everybody to leave so that he could say go=
odbye to his=0ABuffy. "You have to go home, Joyce," he could here Mr. Sum=
mers say.
=09"No," she replied, "I=92m not leaving her."
=09"It=92s not good for you to do this. Buffy is not going to wake up. We=
 have to=0Ago home. Please=85"
=09"Fine, " she muttered.
=09Angel hid behind as Mr. and Mrs. Summers stood, arm in arm, walking ou=
t. He=0Athen crept inside and closed the door. Inside he saw a large coff=
in with many=0Aflowers on top. Pictures of when Buffy was younger were di=
splayed on tables.=0ANext to her was a book for friends and family to sig=
n. Angel walked over and=0Awrote his name next to Buffy=92s mother=92s.
After this he went to the coffin. He carefully opened it to reveal a pale=
,=0Asickly looking Buffy. They had done her hair, make-up, and put her in=
 a=0Abeautiful white dress, but her face and eyes were so lifeless. The e=
nergetic,=0Avibrant Buffy he had known was gone. The expression on her fa=
ce was cold, like=0Athe one she had when the Master had killed her. But t=
his time there was no=0Acoming back. He gently brushed a strand of hair o=
ut of her face. Her cheek was=0Acold, and he couldn=92t help but jerk bac=
k.
"I love you," he whispered. "I tried not to, but I couldn=92t stop." Tear=
s=0Astarted to stream down his cheeks. "I made a mistake. I should=92ve k=
nown=0Abetter-I did know better-but my love for you blinded me." He place=
d his hand=0Aon her cheek. His thumb ran over her icy lips. Seeing her Ca=
llaughda ring on=0Aher finger, he removed his own. Gently, he placed it o=
n her finger. Trying to=0Ahold back tears, he placed one last kiss on his=
 lover=92s lips. "I love you.=0AI=92ll always love you." With that said, =
he closed his eyes. Clutching a stake=0Ahe had in his coat, he stuck it t=
hrough his heart. His body quickly turned to=0Adust.
=09Giles, Willow, Cordelia, Xander and Oz walked into the room a few minu=
tes=0Alater. Xander had brought a dozen white roses while Giles had Buffy=
=92s cross.
Everyone went over to Buffy=92s coffin. Xander placed the roses on the fl=
oor as=0AGiles put the necklace on Buffy. "What=92s this?" he asked aloud=
. He had noticed=0Athe two rings on Buffy=92s fingers. "That=92s Angel=92=
s ring. Where is Angel,=0Aanyway. Didn=92t he want to come?"
Willow took a closer look at Buffy. "He already did," she whispered as sh=
e=0Apointed to the pile of ashes that lay atop her. "He loved her so much=
 that he=0Adied for her."
For a few minutes there was silence as everyone stared at Angel=92s remai=
ns.=0A"Well, at least there=92s one good thing that came out of all this,=
" Cordelia=0Asaid.
"And what would that be?" a teary-eyed Xander asked.
"Now they=92re final together."
***
The End




-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Discuss: Zine Interest Survey...
Date: 16 Jun 1998 22:04:57 EDT

Hey all!

I'm thinking of trying to put out a zine, either print or web (haven't decided
yet), and was wondering what sort of interest there would be in submitting to
it. It'd be a Dru-centric zine, so each story would have to be about Dru...and
preferably not a littany of "how Dru came to be a vampire" stories, 'cause
though those are fun, they're also not quite what I'd be looking for.

Please reply offlist, to me, if you think you'd be interested in submitting to
such a zine.

Rachel



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: mythologist <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: NEVER ALONE 1/1
Date: 17 Jun 1998 08:42:11 -0700

Title: NEVER ALONE
Author: Mythologist
E-mail: [e-mail]
Summary: Takes place a few days after Becoming II.
Disclaimers: The characters in this story are not mine. They are the
property of Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, WB, etc. I am not making any
money from this. This is for fun only.
Feedback: Please.

NEVER ALONE

"Buffy?"
"Angel?"
"Yes."
"Where are you? I can't see you."
"I can't see you either, Buffy."
"What is this place?  I feel very cold."
"That's just fear, honey. Please, don't be frightened."
"Angel?"
"Tell me what you see."
"Nothing.... Just darkness...Am I blind?"
"No.  You are not blind."
"What is this place?"
"This isn't a place, honey."
"Are we... dead?"
"Buffy, do you love me?"
"Of course I love you."
"Do you trust me?"
"I trust you."
"You are not dead."
"Are you sure? I mean how do you know?"
"Because I have been for a long time."
"What was it like?  When your soul was set free I mean."
"Unexplainable I'm afraid. I don't remember much."
"What do you remember?"
"Peace.  Complete and total peace."
"Angel?"
"Yes Buffy."
"Can you hold me?"
"Of course.  How is that?
"I always feel better in your arms."
"As do I, Lover"
"Angel, will you please kiss me?"
"Of course I will."
"I am so sorry for sending you ...away."
"That's all right, honey."
"That was the hardest thing I have ever done."
"You did what you had to do."
"I have missed you so much!  It is really painful!  Us being apart."
"I know. I have missed you too, Buffy."
"I thought I had lost you again!"
"But you didn't. I am here now and I will always be."
"I want to stay with you forever."
"As do I.  But you will have to leave soon."
"Why?  I want to stay with you. I can't leave you!"
"You must go soon."
"I won't leave you, Angel!"
"You're the Slayer."
"I don't want to be the Slayer anymore!"
"The world needs you. Besides-"
"Besides?"
"Besides you can always return to me, Buffy.  Always."
"How?  I don't know how I got here or even where *here* is."
"When you need to, you will know."
"Are you sure?"
"Yes.  You got here didn't you?"
"Angel, I love you."
"I know.  I love you too.  Very much."
"Angel, please hold me tighter.  I just... can't go back right now."
"That's all right. You don't have to leave yet."
"I don't want to be alone anymore."
"You're never alone, Buffy."








-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: [e-mail]
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Vampires, Pookas, and Universal Amalgamators (Part 1)
Date: 17 Jun 1998 16:48:09 -0400

Title:   Vampires, Pookas, and Universal Amalgamators
Author:  Northlight
email:   [e-mail]
Summary:  Dru is up to something, and Buffy and her friends get a
strange ally.
Note:     This story is based on the events in Generation X #36 to #39
(?).  It was an absolutely *terrible* story arc in the comic, but I just
had to see how Buffy and her friends would react to the Pooka <g>.  I
just hope that it doesn't get *too* silly!
Disclaimer:  Buffy and the gang belong to Joss Whedon.  The Pooka and
all related silliness belong to Marvel.


    Buffy swirled around gracefully, the stake held in her hand with casual
familiarity finding it's mark in the heart of her opponent.  The vampire
gaped at her for a moment, stunned that it's unlife was over mere
moments after it had begun.  And then, it's body shattered apart,
nothing but dust left to mark the undead creature's passing.

    The vampire and the dust were expected, but the figure revealed by the
vampire's sudden departure was most assuredly not.  Buffy's eyes
widened, and she shook her head in disbelief, trying to clear the
strange vision before her from her mind.

    It didn't work.

    There was still a giant, seven foot tall weasel lounging against a
headstone.  A *weasel*, Buffy thought incredulously.  Granted, she had
seen a lot of strange things during her career as Slayer, but really,
this was just too ridiculous!

    'What exactly do I do to the weasel?' Buffy wondered as she faced the
weasel awkwardly.  'Giles *never* covered anything like this!'

    Buffy decided that it would be best to stick with tried and true
methods.  She brandished her stake and glared at the weasel
threateningly.  "What the hell are you?" Buffy demanded.

    The weasel smiled suavely, and took a sip from it's martini.  'Oh God!'
Buffy thought, her shock level rising another notch.  'A giant, naked,
talking weasel with a martini!  It must be the stress getting to me...'

    "Elwood," the weasel said calmly.  "Elwood the Pooka."

    Buffy gaped at him.  "Elwood the what?!"  Seeing the weasel -- Pooka --
about to explain what exactly a 'Pooka' was, Buffy shook her head,
cutting the explanation off before it could begin.  "Never mind, I don't
want to know!"

    Elwood merely shrugged and took another sip of his martini.  "I'm here
to help you, Buffy  -- there's something really big going on, and seeing
as you're the Slayer and all, I thought that you'd want to be in on it!"

    Buffy bit back her instinctive urge to demand how he knew that she was
the Slayer and nodded.  "I think I'd better talk to Giles about this,"
she muttered, casting a quick glance towards the amused Pooka.

    The large weasel nodded back to her.  "That's fine with me!  I haven't
had a chance to chat with a Watcher in ages!  It should be a real
blast."  That said, Elwood reached into his pocket of his coat -- the
only clothing he wore -- and riffled around.  He then proceeded to pull
out what looked like nothing so much as a bumper car.  "Hop in," he told
Buffy, already having settled himself into the rather cramped seat.

    "What is that thing?" Buffy asked in shock.  'Could this night possibly
get any stranger?  Pookas and bumper cars pulled from pockets... ugh,
I'm getting a headache just thinking about all this!'

    "It's our mode of transportation to the library.  It'll bounce us there
within moments," Elwood responded.

    "I don't think so," Buffy said, casting a dubious glance at the small
car.  "I'd rather walk, thank you very much!"

    Elwood shrugged.  "If you insist, but my way is much more exciting!"
He stepped out of the car and stuffed it back into his coat pocket.  "So
let's get moving.  Time is a wastin'!"

    They made their way to the library without incident.  Buffy rather
thought that any vampire that was out that night would have been scared
away by the sight of the large weasel at her side.  As it was, Buffy
felt rather uncomfortable herself.  She kept darting nervous peeks at
Elwood.  'A weasel!'

    As usual, Giles was in the library, engrossed in a large leather bound
book.  Willow and Xander were also there, waiting for Buffy to finish
her nightly patrol before they left for the Bronze together.  They
looked up at her arrival, and Buffy hesitated a moment.  What was she
supposed to tell them?  'Hey guys, guess what followed me home?  A giant
weasel!'  Buffy gave a small, mental shrug,  They'd figure out what he
was on their own.

    "Say hi to Elwood," Buffy told them, gesturing towards her strange
companion.

    Their eyes followed her hand, and then Xander's eyes shifted back
towards Buffy.  "You've named the door Elwood?  I've always rather
thought of it as a 'Jasper' myself."

    "I'm not talking about the door, Xander!" Buffy exclaimed, slightly
irritable.  How could he have missed the huge weasel?  "I'm talking
about the weasel!"

    "Um... Buffy?" Willow said hesitantly, as if worried about upseting her
dear and slightly unstable friend any further.  "There's nothing there
-- especially not any weasels."

    Elwood snickered softly and Buffy turned to glare at him.  "They can't
see you!  And what exactly do you find so funny about all of this!?"

    "I love doing that!" he exclaimed.  Seeing the deadly look in Buffy's
eyes, the weasel quickly calmed down.  "Sorry," he said sheepishly.

    Xander's eyes widened.  Obviously, Elwood had fixed things.  "Oh man --
it's a giant weasel!"  He paused a moment.  "Was it just me, or did that
sound like something I never thought that I'd be saying?"

    "Oh my," Giles breathed, staring at Elwood.  There was something
decidedly uneasy in the Watcher's eyes as he looked at the strange
creature in his library.  "A Pooka!"

    Buffy gave a slight sigh of relief.  She wasn't going crazy.  The
others had seen the blasted weasel, and Giles had obviously heard about
these 'Pooka' creatures.  "That's what he said," Buffy agreed with her
Watcher's placement of the weasel in weird creatures family.

    Willow finally found her voice.  She drew her eyes away from the naked
weasel and settled on the much more familiar and reassuring Giles.  "A
what?" Willow asked, unknowingly asking a variation of the same question
Buffy had asked upon being informed of Elwood's Pookaness.

    Noting Giles expression, Buffy realized that the Watcher looked almost
sick as he tore his attention from Elwood and towards his young
charges.  "A Pooka  -- A giant weasel that also happens to be a mythical
creature that appears only to people that he wishes to see him." Giles
explained.

    "So what's our furry friend doing here?" Xander asked, watching the
Pooka with awe.  He had never expected that a seven foot tall, martini
drinking Pooka would make an appearance in his life, and he was taking
full advantage to get in as much amazed gawking as he could.

    "I'm here to warn you about a grave danger that you'll be facing,"
Elwood said, basking in the glow of Xander's attention.

    "I thought that cryptic warnings were Angel's job," Xander said, "but
can we keep the Pooka instead?"  His comment drew a glare from Buffy.

    "What, precisely, do you wish to warn us about?" Giles asked, focusing
on the matter at hand.  And the quicker Elwood delivered his message,
the quicker they would be rid of the bloody weasel.

    The Pooka didn't have the chance to reply to Giles' question, for Angel
chose that moment to make his entrance into the library.  "Buffy,
there's something about to happen tonight--"  He came to a sudden halt
as the Pooka's presence became evident.

    "A Pooka!" Angel growled.

    "A Vampire!" Elwood gasped.

    Buffy moved towards Angel, placing herself between vampire and Pooka --
just in case there was some sort of blood sucking demon/ talking weasel
feud going on.  "You've heard of them?" she asked Angel.  Buffy knew
that there were many things that Angel hadn't told her about his life --
but she figured that his knowledge of the existence of seven feet tall
weasels should have demanded at least a brief comment on his part.

    "Unfortunately," Angel said shortly.

    "Why is it that nobody ever seems happy to see a Pooka?" Elwood asked
while sipping at his martini which didn't appear to have lessened in
content at all since the moment Buffy had first seen the glass.

    "Because your more annoying than Spike even on his worst days?" Angel
snarled.

    Elwood brushed aside Angel's comment.  "You vampires are just annoyed
that you weren't admitted into UBEFSGTTP."

    "UBEFSGTTP?" Buffy echoed.  'Do I even *want* to know what he's talking
about?"

    "United brotherhood of elves, fairies, spirits, gnomes, trolls, tokens
and Pookas," Giles answered automatically, his attention focused on the
room's two non-human occupants.  "Now will one of you please tell us
what it is that we're supposed to be worrying about!?"

    Angel spoke first.  "Dru has the --"

    "Universal Amalgamator," Elwood finished.

    Xander looked from one creature to the other.  "I'm guessing this isn't
a good thing?"

    Giles' voice was strained when he answered.  "Not at all."

End Part 1

http://www.geocities.com/Area51/Lair/7493/index.html



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Re: Hell Part 6
Date: 17 Jun 1998 18:24:31 EDT

I'm sorry, but I seemed to have forgotten to send part 6 of Hell. Here it=
 is:

"Hell" 6/8
by Jaclyn Amy

TITLE: Hell
AUTHOR: Jaclyn [e-mail]
DISCLAIMER: I do not own any of the characters from Buffy the Vampire Sla=
yer.=0AThey belong to Joss Wheden, Mutant Enemy, 20th Century Fox, etc.
RATING: PG-13
WARNING: Some of the scenes have some gory violence. If you don=92t like =
that=0Asort of thing, don=92t read this.
SPOILERS: None.
SUMMARY: This takes place immediately after Becoming Parts 1 and 2. It=92=
s=0Apretty much my own episode after this. Enjoy!
DISTRIBUTION: Ask me first.
FEEDBACK: Please!
AUTHOR=92S NOTE: I have finals to study for, so these will probably come =
out=0Asparatically. I know this section is kinda short, but I didn=92t wa=
nt to add to=0Ait. It would lose its effect.
***
=09"Get away from her," Angel growled, all vamped up, as he ran into Buff=
y=92s=0Aroom. Pike still lay on the floor unconsious, so it was up to him=
 to get=0ADrusilla away.
=09"Angel," she smiled, "you=92re back."
=09He ran over to her and ripped her off Buffy. She grabbed his neck and =
shoved=0Ahim against the wall. Quickly, he hit her arm and kicked her in =
the stomach.=0AUnfased, she clawed his face. Blood started to drip from h=
is cheek. As he put=0Ahis hand to his face, she hit him hard. He hit the =
ground but tripped her as=0Ashe came towards him. When she got up, he gra=
bbed her jaw.
=09"Angel, you can=92t hurt me, not after all you=92ve done," she said, a=
lmost=0Abegged. He closed his eyes and twisted her face so her neck snapp=
ed. The=0Alifeless body fell to the ground. He grabbed a leg of a chair a=
nd broke it in=0Ahalf. With pain he stuck it into her chest.
=09As Angel started to walk over to Buffy, Pike jumped him. "Don=92t you =
touch=0Aher, man."
=09"Get off of me," Angel sneered. He threw Pike off his back into the ch=
air.
=09"Get the hell away from her." Angel tried to throw a punch at him, but=
 Pike=0Ablocked it, sending a hard one his way. He grabbed a stake, ready=
 to kill=0AAngel when Giles, Cordelia, Willow, Xander, and Oz ran in the =
room. "Don=92t,=0Athat=92s Angel!" Willow cried.
=09Just before the stake touched his chest, Pike stopped. He looked up to=
 see=0Aeveryone around. "How=92d you guys get through?" he asked.
=09"That=92s besides the point. Right now-" Giles said.
=09"Angel," Buffy moaned, waking up. "Angel=85"
=09"Buffy?" Angel cried.
=09"Omigod," Cordelia cried.
=09Angel ran over to the limp Buffy. "I=92m right here."
"Angel," she cried, tears flowing down her cheeks, "I=92ve waited so long=
 for=0Athis moment. I love you."
=09"I love you. I=92m never going to let you go." He kissed her. She retu=
rned the=0Akiss with and even more passionate one.
=09The life started to drain out of Buffy. "Close your eyes."
=09"No, Buffy, I=92m not letting you go-"=09
=09"Close your eyes," she ordered. He did as he was told this time. Buffy=
=0Astruggled to hold back her tears as she placed a final kiss on his lip=
s.=0ASuddenly Angel felt Buffy=92s body go limp.
"No," Willow cried. "NO, NO, NO!" She put her hands into her face as she=
=0Acried. Oz came over to her and hugged her tightly.
"Buffy," Xander whispered, his face turning white. "Buffy." Silently, he=
=0Astarted crying. Cordelia came over to him, and they held each other in=
 their=0Aarms. Cordelia comforted him as the woman he loved died.
Giles removed his glasses and put his hand to his face. He tried to hold =
back=0Atears but was unsuccessful.
Mrs. Summers came into the room to see everyone crying and knew what was =
going=0Aon. "Buffy," she cried, "no, no. She=92s not-she can=92t be dead.=
 No, Buffy.=0APlease, God, please=85" Giles embraced her as she wept in a=
gony.
Tears fell down Angel=92s face as he saw the dead corpse in front of him.=
 He=0Adidn=92t utter a word as he placed a kiss on her pale lips.
***
End Part 6/7





-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Love's Revival (18/?)
Date: 18 Jun 1998 21:21:05 EDT

Title: Love's Revival (18/?)
Author: Michelle
Email Addy: [e-mail]
Rating: PG
Spoiler: Nothing really...just a few spoiler hints...
Feedback: PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE!!!
Distribution: Ask first, please.
Disclaimer: Savarah is mine! Buffy and the gang belong to Joss
Whedon, the WB, etc. The Story and the characters not part of the
regular cast are mine!
Sumary:  Buffy + Angel. Need I say more?
IMPORTANT: Sequal to The Dark One Series. This story is explained
as best as I could to fill in the blanks but you have to read
"The Dark One" to understand it. You can check it out as well as all
my other stories at: http://members.aol.com/aglx/fanfic.html

*****

        His lips gently brushed her forehead. Pulling a stray hair
away from her face, he sighed.  "Goodnight, my love." Angel
gently stroked her arm as he made his way to the door.
        "Angel?" Buffy awoke, almost as if she knew he
was trying to leave.
        "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to wake you." He returned to
her and took her hand.
        "It's okay, good dreams haven't exactly been happening
lately."
        His face saddened.  He knew that she was talking about
him, whether she would ever admit to it or not.  When the demon
inside him had control, there was no telling what damage he could
do.  Angel dropped his eyes, wishing he could just go back in time
and fix everything. If only they had known.
        "Are you leaving?"
        "Yeah. The sun's gone down; I need to head home."  He
didn't want to say that it was because he was starving and seeing
her made it even more difficult to control himself.
        "You're coming back?"
        "Of course. I'll be back later tonight. Now get some rest!"
        "Alright," she said, smiling.
        Angel gently raised her hand to his lips and placed a
gentle kiss on it.
        "Goodnight," she said, nearly falling asleep as she let the
sedative take effect.
        He reluctantly let her go and left her to sleep.
        "How is she?" Xander asked, approaching Angel as he left her
room.
        "She's better. Finally let the medicine work."
        "Good."
        The two stood in an awkward silence; Xander had so much he
wanted to say to Angel.  He still couldn't understand why Buffy would
even consider taking him back, but he was starting to accept the fact
that the ægood' Angel was back.
        "Look, I've gotta head home. I'll be back tonight."
        "Okay." Xander tried to keep it short and sweet, avoiding
any serious conversation.  He just wasn't ready yet. One day, the
two of them would exchange some harsh words and then, maybe,
they could go back to just despising each other. But now, it was just
too soon.
        Angel walked away, heading for the entrance.  He knew it
wasn't necessary to say anything else. Xander had every reason
in the world to hate him.  He had done nothing but cause both his
friends and him trouble.  Maybe sometime in the future--after
he had accepted everything himself--he could begin to heal the
wounds he caused to Buffy and her friends. Sometime, after he and
Buffy had taken care of Savarah.
        If it weren't for Buffy's controlling effect on him, he would have
been on his way to kill her now. But Buffy was too important to him,
and he couldn't do that to her. After all Savarah had done to both of
them, she deserved a chance to work out her issues as well. She'd
get that chance; he owed her that at least.

*****
End Part 18. Feedback anyone? Hello???
19 coming in just a second.



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Love's Revival (19/?)
Date: 18 Jun 1998 21:26:13 EDT

Title: Love's Revival (19/?)
Author: Michelle
Email Addy: [e-mail]
Rating: PG
Spoiler: Nothing really...just a few spoiler hints...
Feedback: It would be nice every once in a while.
Distribution: Ask first, please.
Disclaimer: Savarah is mine! Buffy and the gang belong to Joss
Whedon, the WB, etc. The Story and the characters not part of the
regular cast are mine!
Sumary:  Buffy + Angel. Need I say more?
IMPORTANT: Sequal to The Dark One Series. This story is explained
as best as I could to fill in the blanks but you have to read
"The Dark One" to understand it. You can check it out as well as all
my other stories at: http://members.aol.com/aglx/fanfic.html

This part is just a little fun piece I wrote as Angel is trying to get used
to this whole being good again thing.

*****

       Everything was so cold, so dark.  Dust had clustered
on everything. The room was bare except for a few large objects
that he hadn't taken with him to the warehouse.
        "I'm not that hungry," he decided, turning his back to
the refrigerator that had been unplugged.  His supply of blood
had to be at least a month old. Not even a vampire would drink
that.
        The room felt so different.  As time passed, he still
couldn't forget.  He and Buffy had made a huge mistake that
night.  Then again, maybe it hadn't been a mistake. Maybe it had
been the best thing they could have done.  Nothing good could
ever come from their love; only pain, only death.  Maybe his
evil would have given her the motivation she needed to put
an end to his life.
        He glanced at his watch. 4:00AM. The sun would be up
soon, and he had to find something to eat.  Angel finally decided
to find Willy; even his supply would be better than what was in
the fridge.

~~~

        "Angel. I...uh...um...What are you doing here?"  He backed
slowly away until he hit a wall.  Willy was trying to be casual but he
couldn't hide his fear of Angel.
        "Relax Willy. I'm good again."
        "Oh, hey, that's great. Isn't that great?" He stumbled
over every word that came out of his mouth.  Willy had learned
to be careful around all vampires, especially Angel.
        "I don't know. Haven't decided yet." Angel enjoyed
playing with his head; Willy was just an easy target. "Give me
some of your best stuff."
        "Huh? Oh, yeah, sure." Willy walked to the end of the
bar and reached below for a box.
        "Nope, not that one." Angel took a seat on a bar
stool.  He smirked and pointed to the back room. "I said your
best stuff."
        "Hey sure, can't fool you. Be right back." Willy
cautiously walked to the back room to get his hidden supply.
Spike had told him to hold on to it till he could send
some men to pick it up.   Spike liked to keep a supply for when
there wasn't anyone good to eat around. Willy sure was going
to pay for it when Spike found out who got it instead.
        "Here you go friend. But, uh, this is supposed to be for
Spike."
        "Oh.  That's just too bad. But I got here first and I'm
really hungry."  Angel voice dripped with evil.  He knew that
Willy was afraid of him. Even though he wasn't Angelus, he
figured he had no reason to be kind to a guy who would betray
anyone for the right price.
        "Hey sure, take it. I can get some more." Willy cowered
behind the counter. "I think," he mumbled under his breath.
        "Huh?" Angel heard every word but he couldn't help
himself.
        "Oh, nothing. Is that all you need?"
        "Yeah, this will do for now." Angel got up and took the
entire box with him. "Oh, and tell Spike thanks for the blood."
        "Uh, sure. Will do."

End Part 19. Feedback? PLEASE?



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: "A Slip of the Tongue" (1/1)
Date: 19 Jun 1998 09:21:36 EDT

Notes: Takes place during "Becoming II", right before/during Xander popping
out of the bushes outside the mansion.
Disclaimers: Standard ones apply.
Feedback: YEA! To [e-mail], please.

~

                     "A Slip of the Tongue"
                         By Rachel Brody

     "'Tell her I'll save him.' Jeez. What's she think she is, some
kinda wizard?" Xander let fly a kick, striking a splintered, fallen
tree branch with his foot, then ignoring the branch as it skittered
away.
     What was Willow's deal, he wondered. He loved her to death,
always had and always would, but...this was going ever-so-slightly
too far, as far as being a good friend went. Yeah, he realized
Willow had a fixation on helping Angel regain his soul, but what
Xander couldn't understand was...why? Angel had never been
particularly close to Willow, at least, not that Xander knew of--
not that he was always a million percent up to speed with Willow's
personal life, he reminded himself-- and she had been the first one
he'd attacked when he'd changed. Not counting his verbal assault on
Buffy, of course.
     "But really," Xander sighed, letting rip another monologue to
the trees he was wandering through, "this is nuts. I mean, what's
she doing, having me tell Buffy? Wouldn't that mean that Buff'll
just try to _stall_ him, instead of giving it the old Sunnydale
fight? And what good will that do anybody in the end?" He shook his
head. "Really, Will," he said to the forest, "you should think
these things through a little bett-- Ow!"
     He cast a rueful glance downward, his eyes falling on a large
sized rock. Stooping, he picked it up and held it in front of him
as he continued his journey to the mansion. "You know," he said,
turning his discourse on the inanimate object, "of all the people
who would have thought about that angle of things, that telling
Buffy that Will wanted to save her ex-_boyfriend_ might not help
save the world any...well, I don't know. It seems like it would be
fairly obvious, and Willow usually notices the obvious. Before me,
I mean. Because I'm just Xander, I'm not..."
     He sighed, trailed off, and shook his head. "Sorry," he
apologized, "rambling."
     The rock didn't voice any objections.
     "Anyway," Xander continued, talking more and more to himself
as opposed to the rock as time passed, "you know, I'm just sort of
wondering if telling Buffy this is really the best thing. For her.
Because this has nothing whatsoever to do with the fact that, well,
I'm insanely jealous that she still cares about _Angel_ these days.
The guy's been a bastard since she and he-- well-- since they did,
and you'd think a smart, pretty girl like Buff would realize
there're other fish in the sea! Other stars in the sky! I mean, not
me, `cause I have Cordelia...but even watching Willow and Oz is--"
He swallowed, suddenly remembering how Willow had thought he was
Oz, just prior to really regaining consciousness, and reminded
himself that this wasn't about him and Willow, him and Buffy,
Willow and Oz, or himself and Cordelia. This, like so much else,
was about _Buffy_, and what was best for her. "--is better than
thinking about how Buff is still all upset about Angel."
     He shook his head, grinning slightly. "'Course," he said
suddenly, "as the messenger, I do have ultimate responsibility for
what Buffy finds out. Sort of. She'll find out later, I know, but
I could always mix things up a little, you know, mess around
with them some and hope things work out better. `Cause you know,
who knows. Maybe Willow's brain _did_ get a little mushed up in
that hit. And maybe she's not competent to make decisions like
this. I know she didn't _look_ too competent, but maybe that's just
me." Considering that possibility for a few seconds, Xander shook
his head. "Nah," he sighed, shaking his head at the rock, then
letting it drop to his side. "Willow wouldn't make that kinda
mistake. I mean, we're talking about the girl who got me through
chem class this year. And biology last year...and just about every
non-English class I've ever taken."
     He sighed, resigning himself to the fact that yes, it was
true, Willow probably _had_ considered things from all angles, and
had most likely made the best choice. Because this was Willow, who
was the most unselfish person Xander had ever known. Always the one
who made sure he knew what was going on in class, always the one
who saved him treats when her mom made them after school, always
the one who cared about how he was doing and what he was going to
do with himself when nobody else seemed to give a damn.
     But...
     "God _damn_ it!" Xander yelled suddenly, surprising himself
with the force of his voice. "Will, why couldn't you be just a
_little_ selfish?! Just _this_ time?!" For a few seconds, Xander
contemplated hurling the rock through the air, releasing some
aggression that way. Then he decided against it. If he met up with
any baddies before he got to Buffy, he might need some sort of
weapon. Not that a rock was really any kind of defense against
a vampire, but it would be, well, nice if he could at least pretend
to put up a fight.
     That'd be sweet, though. If Willow had been selfish, just this
once. Xander almost smiled at the idea of Willow telling him
something like, "Tell Buffy to kick Angel's pathetic little _ass_,
Xander."
     "Yeah. That'd be _real_ Willow-ey," he said, shaking his head
slightly. "Dream _on_." It'd never happen. He knew it would never
happen. And yet, the idea of Willow going on a mega-vindictive
spree was so appealing, Xander couldn't keep himself from imagining
the rest, as it might happen. Will going all ballistic and
screaming, shoving Angel up against a wall, maybe cursing him out
a few times with something a little less pleasant than, "here, you
have a conscience now, go brood and fool around with Buffy." Xander
snorted. Some curse.
     That'd be _rich_. Tell Buffy to kick Angel's ass.
     "Tell Buffy," Xander said to himself in the best imitation of
Willow's voice he could achieve after seventeen years of exposure,
"that for all I care, Angel can _kiss my ass_. Tell him he and his
whole vampire _crew_ to watch out, `cause I'm on the _warpath_ and
he's gonna get it."
     Immediately feeling guilty for the imitation, which admittedly
sounded more like something out of a Schwartzenegger movie than
something from his bookish best bud, Xander felt a blush creeping
into his neck as he saw the mansion Buffy had spoken of rising up
over the treetops ahead. She'd be over there, he thought, and it
was now only a matter of moments before he would have to deliver
his message.
     That thought was enough to sober him. "Angel's gonna be all
better," he sniped to himself, in the most mocking tone he could.
"Angel's gonna be just fine, so no worries, happy happy happy-
friggin'-happy."
     He sighed, and kicked another rock. Dammit, this was so not
the fair thing. Everything else aside, what if the curse didn't
work? Then what? "She'll get her hopes up for nothin', that's
what," Xander sighed to himself. "Then she'll get all upset again.
And we'll have that whole, `I am completely rejecting every feeling
I am experiencing, not an emotive bone in _this_ body' routine, and
it'll take her forever to get out of it, and in the meantime we'll
all have to worry, and..."
     And there she was, marching up the road with a huge sword in
her hand and the most determined look on her face Xander had ever
seen. No exceptions. Whatsoever. A chill ran down his spine, and he
wondered what it was about the way she was walking that screamed
anybody who got in her way was going to _get it_.
     "Hey!" he called, jumping out of the bushes as she passed him
by. Immediately, he realized how stupid it was to jump at her
without warning when she had _that look_ on her face, and took a
few steps back, laughing nervously.
     She turned to him. "Xander!"
     He gave her a wan smile. "Cavalry's here," he said. Then he
held up the rock. "Cavalry is a scared guy with a rock, but it's
here." She didn't smile, passing him a stake instead. "That's
better," he said, casting the rock down.
     Buffy's reaction was a humorless one. "You're not here to
fight. You get Giles and run." She shook her head. "I can't protect
you. I'll be too busy killing."
     *Shit,* Xander thought, staring at her. His eyes traveled from
her face, an emotionless mask, to the sword she clasped in her
hand. "That's a new look for you," he offered by way of a pathetic
attempt at conversation.
     "It's a present for Angel," she said quietly.
     The look on her face remained impassive, and Xander swallowed,
realizing how far they had all misjudged events. They knew Buffy
had been hurt, knew she was in pain, and knew she wanted like all
hell to get some sort of revenge on Angel for what he had done to
them-- but none of them, not him, or Cordie, or Willow...maybe not
even Giles, he thought-- had understood just how deep the need for
closure ran through her.
     "Willow--" he began, then he cut himself off. Not knowing how
to tell her, when she was like this, when she seemed to be hurting
so badly and having so much trouble damping it down.
     "What about her?" Buffy asked, turning her gaze, which
suddenly sprang to life at the mention of their injured friend,
upon him.
     "Willow said..." Xander swallowed, suddenly losing all
capability to speak clearly as he looked into Buffy's eyes. They
were full of all the nightmares, all the pain,
everything...suddenly, almost before Xander realized it, the words
he had spoken to himself in the woods, playing the old game, `what
if Willow had a spine', came back to him.
     "She told me to tell you to kick his ass."
     Xander heard the words coming from his lips, scarcely
believing what he had just said. Time seemed to slow, and he heard
them echoing, and in the same moment screamed at himself, what had
he just done? Said?
     *Stupid, stupid!* he yelled, over and over in his mind. This
wasn't a time for _jokes_! He had a _message_ for Buffy! And he had
to give it to her! He couldn't just make some stupid crack like
that, not at a time like _this_.
     Suddenly, he realized he hadn't corrected himself yet.
     But glancing upward, he realized that Buffy had already moved
on past him, her gait even more determined than it had been before.
Everything about her, hardened and set upon a course of action.
     And as he stared at her in horror, a single thought rose to
the top of his mind.
     *My God,* Xander thought, somehow knowing it was too late to
take back what had been said in error, *What have I _done_?*

THE END

Copyright 1998
Rachel Brody

Comments to [e-mail], please.



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: [e-mail] (Charity C. T.)
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Chronicles (18/?)
Date: 19 Jun 1998 10:20:14 -0700

Name: Chronicles of the White Knight #18 Acceptance
Author: Taygeta
Address: [e-mail]
Feedback: Please!
Uses in anything: Sure, but tell me first.
Spoiler: Not really, might have mentioned a past episode.
Disclaimer: The Buffy characters portrayed in this story and any other
references to Buffy the Vampire Slayer are the property of its creater
Joss Whedon, and its owners Mutant Enemy productions, Kuzui Productions,
Sandollar Productions, and 20th Century Fox.
Rating: PG

*****************************
Chronicles of the White Knight
#18 Acceptance
By: Taygeta

    Calmly, Xander closed the bedroom door behind him, dropping his
bag on a nearby, cluttered chair.  He fell down on his bed and in his
mind, he heard the pounding of his heartàgoing faster and faster every
second.  Thumpàthumpàthumpàthump, thump, thump, thump, thump,
thump-thump-thump-thump-thumpàuntil finally, the echoing sounds of his
mind grew too intense and he couldn't take it anymore.

    In his frustration, he stood up and slammed his fist against a
wall, but the pain that reverted from that angry blow caused him to start
jumping around like mad while clutching his hand, "Owwwww!"

    The physical pain receded, but his wounded heart and pride had to
heal as he recalled the earlier eventsà

    "àI want to bring him back," Buffy said walking towards him as
she looked at the back of his head, "It was because of me that he became
Angelus.  This spellàit'll let me stop him from doing all of these
horrible things *without* killing him."

    "But he - I mean, Angelus, killed Ms. Calendar!  He practically
killed all of us, and I would be dead right now, if we hadn't beaten him
at his own game and if you turn him back, it'll be like all is forgiven.
I can't accept him after all that he's done to us, even though it wasn't
exactly in his control.  A-and how I can I accept you wanting to do this
when he - " he said as his voice drew to a soft tone as he met her eyes,
" -he'll still loves you?"

    "I can't accept the things that happened through Angelus, but I
can forgive Angel for being the person that demon carried all of those
things through," she said.  Then with a deep breath, she continued
gently, "And when he returns he might love me as he did before, but more
likely he'll be hating himself for all the things that occurred.  Even if
he did love me, the way that we loved before the - y'know - it wouldn't
matter to me.  Angel and I - that was before, but you and I are now, and
right now, I love you, Xander Harris."

    "And I love you, too, but Buffy, there's always going to be a
chance that Angel will turn back into Angelus and start killing and
hurting all that we care about. Still, if you think that this is the best
wayàif you think that this will bring less harm," he said, "Then, do what
you have to doàI won't stop youàwhat am I saying?  How can I stop you?"

    "You're the best, you know that, don't you?" she said kissing him
lightly on the lips as her arms encircled his neck, "Are you sure you're
okay with all of this?"

    "I'm fineà"

    à  He had lied terribly; he wasn't the least bit fine about any
of this.  A more accurate response would have been to shout out "NO!"
Not only was he not comfortable with this decision, he was also mad and
frustrated to an immeasurable extent.

    Xander could feel the green-eyed monster of jealousy rear its
ugly head, as he thought about all of his years against Angel.  He had to
admit, though, that Angel was a good guy when he had a soul, except for
the part of being Buffy's boyfriend.  He had even come to trust him
somewhat, but that friction that had been there from day one continued to
be there and never went away.

    "àlet your feelings flow through your fingertipsà" the familiar
voice of Mrs. Roslyn echoed in his mind as his eyes fell to his Creative
Writing composition book.

    With a deep and thoughtful breath, Xander picked up the badly
weathered notebook and turned to a clean page.  He rummaged in his bag
for a pencil and then leaned against the headboard of his bed.  He then
scribbled a few words, which turned to sentences, which turned to this:

    I hate him.  I've always have and perhaps always will.  He took
her away before I even had the chance to speak my heart.  He took her
away before I even had a chance to give him a piece of my mind.  She
loved him, but I can't even like him.  Trustàdistrustà a hazy barrier
between him and me, that and loving her.  Resentment?  Jealously?  It's
all there, with it's permanent place among angered encounters and forced
alliances for the sake of the girl we both lovedà

    Finally after about a few pages of writing, he tapped the eraser
of the pencil on the last page, and sighed thoughtfully.  He re-read his
work slowly, as if analyzing each sentence, and he realized that they all
seeped with the anger and the hate that he had always felt about Angel.
Yet, no matter how much he disliked him, he would not stop Buffy from
executing the curse to alter Angelus into Angel.  This was a way for her
to heal past wounds still open, bleeding, and he would do anything to
make her sorrows go awayàmake the hurt go away, simply because he loved
her.

    <Besides, > thought Xander with a light chuckle as he placed his
composition book back in his bag, <knowing Buffy, she'd do it anyway.  >

_____________________________________________________________________
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-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: _-Sun-_ <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Charlotte Sometimes (Part 36)
Date: 20 Jun 1998 02:14:02 -0700

Charlotte Sometimes (Part 36)

((VIOLENCE))


    Drusilla's shaking hands gently lifted the heavy blanket. Movements so
slow, she could have been preternatural. Her body lightly shook as she
tried to hold in her screams and her cries, moving the covers with a
gradual grace of will.
    But the main objective was clear. Don't Wake The Demon!
    He didn't stir once as she managed to move the covers from most of her
upper body. But she was far to frightened to stand up. Inches from tears
she laid back down on the bed slowly yet again, unable to grasp the
concept of life, of getting away from this man... This thing!

    Her legs moved out from the blankets slowly - and didn't actually know
she'd moved until the cold floor shivered beneath her feet.

    She could however feel her heart pounding in her head. It was getting
louder with the passing seconds... Could he hear? Could he hear her
heart? Her thoughts? Did he know she was moving? That she was going
against him to escape?
    Drusilla began to take deeper breaths. Her chest heaving in
exasperation. She had to calm. She *had* to get out!
    She moved slowly to stand, her body aching, screaming at her to run.
    But she wasted precious seconds to take another look at him. To look
once more upon the face of her love.
    Her head lied to her. She could hear the argument begin.
    He might be Angelus still.. Be her loving Angel!
    Though he was a monster! Bent to kill her! He'd destroyed and murdered
already! How many lives had he taken? How many more?
    Could he be cured? She could help him.
    Unless he killed her first...

    Worth her life she couldn't get her body to move outside the door,
barely 3 feet from where she stood.
    She needed to see him. To know he was evil. And to be reminded that
this WASN'T a dream, that reality and hell had combined against her.

    So her fingers gently moved away from her waist.
    But these weren't her actions. How could they be? Fingers that no
longer shook? How could she suddenly be so sure that he wasn't going to
hurt her?
    How she managed to move that one hand across the bed and to the covers
concealing his face she didn't know, or could she remember.
    How could she move like this? When it took so much strength and will to
get up away? Away from the thing she wanted most...

~

    His mind snapped open at the feel of warm fingers on his skin. Not even
fully awake he immediately darted out, grabbing the wrist that was
touching his face and sent his victim flying next to him on the bed.
    He held the mortals arm, ready to break it, and kill, until he realized
that this was Drusilla. Not some slayer or hunter.
    And she was crying, her mouth opened as though to scream but no sound
issued forth.
    He smiled, jumping over to kneel above her. His cold fingers tracing
the outline of her lips.
    "Forgive me, Drusilla" he asked demeaning her by using his voice. By
using Angels voice!

~

    Drusilla's fists clenched, her nails digging into her skin, ready to
break it.
    Her mind screamed at her to get out. This was the demon! He *was* evil.
And she was in real danger. Now was the time to panic, and now was the
time to react.
 She hit him as hard as she could, it didn't phase him at first, until
she hit his head, screaming and crying as loud as she could.

He grabbed her shoulders, shoving her into the soft mattress. Her
continuous shrieks nagging in his head. He wanted to snap the neck of
this new noise machine, but instead of using pain he went towards a new
approach.

Drusilla felt a small victory when he left her go. She was free and
stepping away from her opponent, she ran to the door as fast as her
shaking body could take her.

Not bothering to look back even once she slammed into the door -
pounding on the hinges as it  didn't open.

    Drusilla let few tears fall over this door as she turned to run the
other way, to find another exist.

    But he was there. As always, and she slammed right into him. But he
didn't waist a second to hurt her and she felt her body flying towards
the other end of the small room.


--
_-SuN-_

SD - Http://home.earthlink.net/~kbleyle/SD/index.html

    Daylight licked me into shape, I must have been asleep for
days. And moving lips to breathe her name, I opened up my eyes
And found myself alone alone, Alone above a raging sea
That stole the only girl I loved, And drowned her deep inside
of me (The Cure)

_ - _Spikette _ Dru's Dolly - Mercenary_ - _
  _ - _ Head Dominatrix in the Evil _ - _
_ - _   Plan For World Domination, _ - _
  _ - _ With Chains and Stuff _ - _



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: Jeff Weitkamp <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Strangers.   Part 1
Date: 21 Jun 1998 10:42:59 -0700

Name:  Strangers
Author: Jeff W
E-Mail: [e-mail]
Feedback: Yes please. Tell me anything. Was is good, bad, or what.
Distribution: Please ask and I'll say yes.
Spoilers: Becoming 1 & 2
Summary: This is a Buffy only story dealing with her experiences soon
after Becoming 2
Rating: PG
Time line: After Becoming part 2
Disclaimer: Most of the characters in this story belong to Joss Wheadon
ect.

*********************************

Strangers by Jeff


    So there I was. It was early evening and I was sitting in some truck
stop caf=E9. Reading a newspaper that a previous customer had left and
minding my own business. When suddenly I sense somebody sit down on the
bench on the other side of my booth.
    The nerve of some people, I think to myself. So I come up with a
great slam for the SOB who is invading my space. I lower the paper but
my awesome put down freezes on my lips.
    Weakly I manage to say. "Ah Hi."
    Sitting across from me is this woman. And what a woman. She would
definitely be somewhere near the top of my top ten gorgeous babe's list.
She had very fair skinned with short jet-black hair that was just below
her ears. And there she was sitting across from me with her elbows on
the table, and her chin resting on her folded hands, just looking at me.

    But what really caught my attention were those eyes. Now I'm the
first to admit that when I first meet a woman the eyes are usually not
the first thing I notice. But these eyes were different. They were like
two seas of an icy blue liquid that seemed to have an infinite depth.
Floating in the middle of each were two sparkling jewels of ebony. When
they looked at you, they would just draw you in. I felt that if I took a
step forward I would fall into them. And I would gladly fall forever.
    "Hello." She said.
    Her words shook me from my trance.
    "Hello." I said. "But I already said that didn't I." I'm sounding
cool I thought to myself. "My name is John."
    "I'm Carla." She said in a voice that was almost as entrancing as
her eyes.     "Nice to meet you John."
    "Hi Carla." I said. "Can I do you? What I mean is, WHAT can I do FOR
you?"
    She smiled at my slip of the tongue and said. "Well you can let me
buy your dinner."
    "But I've already eaten."
    "So I see. Then that would mean you're ready to leave?"
    "Oh. I'm sorry do you need the table?"
    "No, not at all. I was hoping to leave with you."
    I swallowed trying not to act too surprised. Doesn't this kind of
thing happen everyday? Not to me it doesn't
    "With me? Sure, where are you heading?" I asked while I stood up and
reached for my wallet.
    "No my treat. Your money is no good here." Carla said as she reached
into her purse and deposited a twenty on the table. Then to the
approaching waitress, she said. "Keep the change."
    The waitress quickly realized that the tip was larger than the
entire check and said. "Yes ma'am. Thank you very much."
    Then Carla stepped up to me and took my arm, and without me
realizing it, started me walking towards the door.
    "Where did you say you were going?" I asked as we walked out the
door.
    She smiled at me. It was a smile that was right up there with that
voice. I was like putty in her hands.
    "Well." Carla Said. "Let's just go to your car. Once we get there we
can decide where to go next."
    Those eyes looked at me. I felt like I was on a precipice about to
fall. I wasn't wrong.
    "I'm parked over here." I said fumbling trying to get my keys from
my pocket.
    Soon we reached the car. "Here we are." I announced.
    She looked around the parking lot. I followed her gaze and saw no
one around.
    Before I realized it, Carla had me backed up against the car. Her
lips felt like rose petals against mine. She kissed me like there was no
tomorrow. I kissed her back like I had never kissed before in my life.
It felt like that kiss lasted for hours.
    Then before I realized it she broke the kiss and began gently began
to nibble on my ear.
    Always the joker I said. "If you're that hungry maybe we should go
back inside and I'll buy you dinner."
    She stopped nibbling and said. "No need for that. I've got my dinner
right here.
    I smiled as I thought of the possible implications of what she said.

    Then suddenly she pulled back. I looked at her face. But it wasn't
her face. The face of my dream woman had been replace with that of the
devil. Bony ridges had replaced what I remembered as smooth lines. Those
entrancing eyes I had seen before were replaced by two dark orbs that
were like looking into the pits of hell.
    And her smile had been replaced by a gaping void that was surrounded
by sharp jagged teeth, dominated by two large fangs.
    I couldn't move. I couldn't think. I couldn't speak. I couldn't even
scream. All I could do was stare at this hell-spawned monster.
    Those burning eyes stared at me for a moment. Then she smiled. A
gross caricature of a smile dominated by those hideous fangs. She
reached up with one hand and slowly pulled my head to the left, fully
exposing my neck.
    All I could do was stand there pined helplessly against the car.
    Then with a speed that was astounding her head come forward and I
felt those fangs sink into my neck.
    My knees buckled but she held me in place. Darkness began to creep
into the edges of my vision as I began to feel my life slip away.
    Suddenly Carla or what ever she was, jerked her head away from me,
her mouth wide with a silent scream. I felt her grip release me and I
fell to my knees. Then Carla appeared to turn into a dried out shell,
which suddenly exploded in a cloud of dust, which rained down on me.
    Coughing I looked up. Instead of Carla there was a young blond girl
standing there. She was holding something long and dark in her hand. But
before I could tell what it was, she put it away in a pocket.
    She stepped up, knelt beside me and said, "Are you okay?"

___________________

    I was walking down some road. I didn't know what road. I didn't know
where it led. I didn't even know where it came from. I really didn't
care. All I really wanted to do was keep moving down it. I think
somewhere in the back of my mind I thought that if I kept moving that
maybe eventually I would go far enough to get away from the pain.
    Or maybe I thought that if I moved far enough from home that I could
take away all the pain and disappointment I had caused everyone in my
life.
    I know I'm a major disappointment to Giles because I'm not the kind
of slayer that someone like him would want, and deserve. And I don't
know how he can even look at me knowing that I couldn't save Jenny.
    How can I forgive myself for having put Willow and Xander in so much
danger? The last time I saw Willow she lying unconscious was in the
hospital. They're two of my best friends. Not to mention Cordiela. Then
again, maybe I could forgive myself for that, a little.
    Then there is Mom. I tried to be a good daughter. But trying to keep
half of my life secret from her is not a good start. How could she not
be hurt when she found out? And considering the things that have
happened in the past should I be surprised that she didn't really
believe me. Then there's getting kicked out of school, again. No wonder
she threw me out.
    And what about Kendra. I should've been there instead of fighting
with Angel. Maybe then she wouldn't be dead.
    And Angel my love. Every time I think about what I did to you, I....
How could I have done what I did to you? Just when you came back to me,
I betray you. I just couldn't see any other way.
    I'm not sure how long I wondered around like that. In this daze, I
jokingly call a life. Days, weeks, months. Who knows?
    Sometimes I walked. Sometimes I would ride. Sometimes I would just
sit. But most of all I cried.
    So, if you were to ask me how I came to be on that part of that road
at that time, I would have to say, "Color me clueless."
    But there I was walking along some road one evening. Usually I
looked at my feet. But for some reason, I looked up. Maybe it was the
smell of the food. Had I eaten at all that day? Maybe, maybe not.
    So I look up to see this couple walking out of the restaurant arm in
arm. Of course, as soon as I saw them I thought about me and Angel.
    I don't know what it was but something told me to keep an eye on
them. It certainly wasn't because I was at the top of my slayageness
that's for sure. I just kept an eye on them. I also moved a little
closer just in case.
    Then they got to this car and this girl attacks the guy. Not attack,
attack but attacks in a nice way. You know, a really nice way. As Willow
would say, "Lots of smoochies."
    I watch for a few seconds but of course, I think about Angel. And my
heart begins to break again. I start to turn away.
    The girl has her back to me so I can't see her face. But I catch a
glimpse of the guy's face. And he suddenly gets this look on his face.
I've seen it before whenever a civilian gets their first look at a
Vampire, or demon. Believe me it pretty it's not.
    Well no matter what, I'm still the Slayer. Right?
    Right. So of course, I have a stake handy. I feel almost like my old
self again. I cover the distance between me and the Vamp in record time.
Normally I would've warned her before I killed her. You know, that whole
fair fight thing. But not today, before she had any idea I was there,
she was toast.
    As soon as she was gone the guy's legs give way and he falls to his
knees.
    He sits there on his knees and looks at me, still trying to figure
out what happened. I notice his gaze drop to my hand with the stake, so
into my pocket is goes.
    I look around to make sure that there weren't any other vampires
around.
    Seeing none, I walk over to the guy. I kneel down and grab his
shoulder to help steady him. He's a little cute, but real old. He must
be close to thirty, I thought. He looked a little pale but what would
you expect.
    "Are you okay?" I ask.
    He just stares at me so I ask again. "Are you okay? Can you stand
up?"
    He blinks a couple of times then finally speaks. "Y- Y- Yes. I think
so"
    "Good. Then let's get you up off the pavement."
    He's holding his right hand against his neck so I moved around to
the other side to help support him.
    He try's to stand. But he gets one foot under him then collapses.
    "I guess maybe I can't stand." He says.
    "That's okay. I say. "Take your time."
    Then I catch a glimpse of his left hand and see a set of keys there
being griped very tightly.
    "Is this your car?" I ask.
    "He manages a weak, "What?"
    "I said is this car yours?"
    He glances back and says. "Yes."
    "Give me the keys." I asked.
    He looks at me blankly but hands the keys over.
    "Just stay right here, Okay?"
    All I get is a nod.
    Taking the keys, I stand up. I unlock the driver's door and pull it
open.
    Giving the keys back, I say. "I'm going to sit you in the car. Don't
try to move or anything. I'll take care of everything. Got it?"
    He nods his head.
    I grab him under the arms and ask, "Ready?"
    "Yes."
    I lifted him off the ground and put him in the driver's seat. I can
tell he's getting his strength back because he kind of helped to slide
into the car.
    Once he was sitting, I said. "Let me look at that."
    I lift his hand to peek underneath. Grabbing my bag, I pull out a
bottle of water and a handkerchief. I used these to wash away as much
blood as can. Then I applied a bandage.
    I grabbed his hand and place it over the bandage and say, "Keep some
pressure on there. Not to much or you may cause yourself to pass out."
    By now, the adrenaline has wearing off. I sigh to myself as I
realized that the depression was coming back.
    "He nods his head and says, "Did what I think happened, just
happen."
    "I don't know." I say. "I just put a bandage on you. Is that what
you think happened?"
    "No not that. I mean before. With Carla"
    I think to myself All right Buffy. What am I going to tell this guy?






-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: Jeff Weitkamp <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Strangers.  Part 2
Date: 21 Jun 1998 10:45:10 -0700

Name:  Strangers
Author: Jeff W
E-Mail: [e-mail]
Feedback: Yes please. Tell me anything. Was is good, bad, or what.
Distribution: Please ask and I'll say yes.
Spoilers: Becoming 1 & 2
Summary: This is a Buffy only story dealing with her experiences soon
after Becoming 2
Rating: PG
Time line: After Becoming part 2
Disclaimer: Most of the characters in this story belong to Joss Wheadon
ect.

*********************************
Strangers   Part 2

    I was getting better, but I was still feeling a little light headed.
Every so often, the world would start to spin a little. Or a little
blackness would creep into my vision. All in all, I'm sure I'm getting
better.
    Getting into the car helped some. But man is that little girl
strong.
    Looking back at me she pulls my hand a little way from my neck and
says, "Let me take a look at that."
    Putting my hand back she says, "That's not to bad." She reaches into
her bag and pulls out what appears to be a bottle of water and a cloth.
    I watched her as she wets the cloth and begins to clear away some of
the blood. Finishing that she gets a square bandage and puts it on my
neck.
    Taking my hand, she pours some water over it to wash away some of
the blood. Then she places it over the bandage and says. "Keep some
pressure on there. But not too much or you'll be passing out."
    I didn't bother to mention that passing out was a possibility one
way or another.
    This girl sure seemed too cheerful.
    Finally, I had to ask. "Did what I think happened, just happen?"
    "I don't know." She responded. "I just put a bandage on you. Is that
what you think happened?
    "No I mean before that. With Carla."
    "Oh Carla, that must be the lady who got mad and left. Well I'm not
sure what happened. I'm walking by and I see you two getting up close
and personnel, you know. I mean reeeal close, and really personnel. When
suddenly she gets mad. Yeah she gets mad you see. And. And she starts
yelling at you. And yelling something's that weren't very lady like
either."
    "So. Ah. So she's yelling. And you, you're trying to calm her down.
But she won't listen. Okay?"
    "So she reaches back and swings at you." She says pulling back her
hand like she was going to punch.
    "But no." The girl reaches her right hand over her left shoulder.
"This Carla lady reaches back like this and swings. What do you call it?
Oh Yeah. She swings backhand like this." She says as she swings her hand
through the air.
    "Okay. But you see it coming, Right. So you try to duck. But you're
just a little to slow and she hits you on the neck."
    She paused. "Right there on the neck you see. Where she hit you.
And. And. I don't know, maybe this Carla must have been wearing a ring.
Yeah! That's it. She's got this big ring with lots of pointies on it.
And I guess some of those pointies hit you and caused your neck to
bleed. And that explains why your neck is bleeding. Right?"
    "Then." The girl continued. "She must have been done yelling because
she turned around and stomped to her car. Got in and drove off."
    "And she drove off so fast, that it threw up a big cloud of dust.
Which explains why you are all covered in this dust." She says as she
reaches over to dust off my shirt.
    "And that is exactly the way it happened. Right?"
    She looked at me for a second and said, "Why, what do you think
happened?"
    I looked at her for a hand full seconds and thought to myself I have
no idea what she just said. But I know that was about as far from the
truth as you can get. But I don't want to think about it right now.
    "Well." I said. "That's exactly what I thought happened."
    She just looked at me for a second. Then she said. "You did? I mean
you do?"
    Then she smiled and her voice assumed a more positive tone and she
said, "Oh course you did. Because. Because that's exactly what did
happened. So naturally that's what you would remember."
    "Well." I say. "I must thank you for your first aid a..."
    I paused then said. "I don't even know your name."
    "Oh me. My name is Buffffonnie. I mean Bonnie.  Yeah. Bonnie."
    "Well Bonnie. My name is John. John Devlin."
    "Nice to meet you John."
    "Same here Bonnie. But I really must thank you for your help."
    "No that's okay. No big deal." She bent over, picked up her bag, and
said, "But your welcome And I should be getting on my way. So Bye."
    For some reason, I feel that I shouldn't just let her go. So I say,
"Well can I at least buy you something to eat."
    "No really." Bonnie said. "I can't. I need to get on my way."
    She said no, but when I mentioned food, I saw something in her eyes.
She must have been pretty hungry. Then for the first time, I took a good
look at her. She was dirty. Not filthy dirty, but the kind of dirty you
would get when camping, or spending a few days outside. Her hair was
pulled back in a pony tail so with the dim lights in the parking lot it
was hard to tell but I think it may have been a couple of days since her
hair had been washed.
    There was something else too. I'm not sure what but for some reason
I felt this girl needed my help. And come hell or high water she would
get it.
    "What's the hurry." I said. "Come on Bonnie. I insist."
    "No thanks she said as she started to turn away."
    "Please Bonnie."
    Just then, a car came up the highway. We both looked up to see a
police car drive by.
    Bonnie stared after the car, then looked at me.
    After a moment, she said. "Well I guess it's can't hurt to have
something to drink. Because I wouldn't want to hurt your feelings since
your being so nice and everything."
    "That's right you wouldn't want to hurt my feelings."
    I stood up and the world started to spin. I quickly reached out and
grabbed the car door to steady myself. When my vision returned Bonnie
was standing next to me and asking. "Are you all right?"
    "Yeah. I'm ok, I just stood up a little to fast. Let me get a clean
shirt from the trunk then we can go inside.


I couldn't help it. I tried to avoid it but I wanted to get every drop
of strawberry shake out of the glass. But eventually the straw made that
noise it makes when it gets more air than liquid.
    "What a moron he must think I am." I thought as I put down the
glass.
    I looked down at the empty dishes in front of me. I had devoured a
huge Cheeseburger, two orders of cheese fries and the shake.
    "You must think I'm a pig." I said.
    "Not at all." John said with a smile." I'm sure that you've been so
busy all day that you haven't had time for anything to eat.  In my line
of work it happens to often."
    During the time that I ate, John had talked. He was on his way from
LA to Nashville Tennessee to start a new job. He said he was a Network
Architect whatever that was. He tried to explain it to me. But he lost
me almost immediately. I'm pretty sure it has something to do with
computers. I'm sure that if Willow were here she would understand. Then
maybe she could explain it to me so I can understand.
    Thinking about Willow brought back the memories. Memories of home,
Mom, friends, and Angel. My thoughts must have shown on my face because
John said.  "Are you ok?"
    "Oh yeah. I'm fine. " I said. "Just thinking. That's a really bad
habit thingie I have that I'm trying real hard to break."
    "No." John said. "Don't apologize. Sometimes when I think about work
I feel the same way."
    "You know what." I said. "You're a good lair."
    John got a hurt look on his face.
    "Not a liar in a bad way." I continued. "But the nice kind of liar.
You could say something that you know is a lie. And I know is a lie. But
it still makes me feel good. Probably because it's what I wanted to hear
at the time."
    "Oh. I understand." John said. But I could tell from the look on his
face that he didn't.
    "So Bonnie." John said. "Tell me about yourself."
    Bonnie I thought. How could I come up with such a lame name?
    "Not much to tell. Pretty boring stuff actually. Let me ask you a
question." I said trying to change the subject.
    "Shoot."
    "When we came in the waitress gave you a really funny look. When you
saw the look on her face, you said that you forgot to have desert.
Remember?"
    "That's right."
    "But then she said to you I thought that's where you were going when
you left."
    John blushed and looked at the table. Then he said. "Well when I
left before I was with Carla. And I can't imagine why but I guess she
thought Carla would be my desert."
    "Then." I said. "You show up a few minutes later with a different
girl. I can imagine what she's thinking."
    "Maybe I should ask her what she's doing after work. Wouldn't that
blow her mind?"
    It wasn't that funny but I couldn't help myself. I laughed so hard
it brought tears to my eyes.
    "But." He said once we stopped laughing. "You have very skillfully
changed the subject. Again."
    "Oh, did I." I said innocently. "I hadn't noticed."
    He just looked at me.
    Finally, I couldn't take it anymore. "I'm sorry. It's just not ready
to talk about it yet."
    "That's okay." John said. "We'll have plenty of time."
    "What do you mean?"
    "Plenty of time to talk during our ride in the car."
    "Ride? Car?" Was all I managed to say.
    "Yeah a car. You know. Four tires. One steering wheel. You put gas
in it and it goes vrooom Then you get in and you ride places."
    "I know what a car is. But who said I was going with you."
    "Don't you trust me?" John asked. "Some how I have a feeling that
you can take care of yourself."
    John looked at me for a moment. Then he got a serious look on his
face and said. "It's up to you Bonnie. I'm heading east. I thought maybe
you wanted to get away from here."
    "But how do you know that you can trust me?" I asked.
    "It's just the rambling, gambling kind of guy I am."
    We were both quiet for a moment. Then John leaned forward and said
quietly. "Bonnie. You helped me when I needed it. I'm sure you saved my
life tonight. For that I say thank you."
    "I may be mistaken." John said. "But I have the feeling that you
need some help yourself. I'm offering to help."

_______


    I looked at Bonnie. I could tell my word were having some effect but
I'm not sure which kind.
    "I may be mistaken." I said. "But I have the feeling that you need
some help yourself. I'm offering that help."
    She sat there in silence
    "I tell you what. I'll make this as easy on you as I can. I'll go
pay the check. While I'm gone if you want, you can leave. It's up to
you. If you do, I say again thank you. Good luck with your problems. And
I hope you have a good life."
    I started to get up then thought of something else. "One more
thing." I said. If you do go, I want you to take this." I reached into
my wallet, took out $100 in twenty dollar bills, and sat it on the
table.
    She started to protest but I said. "No. I know it's not much but I
want you to have it. Then maybe you won't have to skip so many meals."
    She had tears in her eyes. I couldn't tell if that was good or bad.
Silently she mouthed the words, "Thank you."
    I smiled back and said. "Your welcome."
    Then I turned to walk up to the counter to pay the tab.
    When I turned back around, she was gone.
    Oh well. I thought. I tried.
    Silently I walked to the table to get my jacket. I absent-mindedly
put on the jacket and stuck my hands into the pockets. There was
something in the right hand pocket. When I pulled out my hand, there
were five twenty-dollar bills.
    I shrugged and put the money in my pants pocket and headed for the
door.
    Once outside I got into the car and pulled up to the gas pumps.
Getting out  I began to fill the tank with gas.
    As I watched the gallons tick by I heard footsteps approaching
behind me.
    "Hey mister." For some reason I was happy when I heard that familiar
voice. "Do you think maybe I could get a ride."
    "I don't know." I said without turning around. My fares are pretty
high."
    "Well I already paid you a hundred dollars."
    "Well since you put it that way." I said.
    Then I walked around to the passenger door and held it open.
    "Your ride awaits fair lady."
    She walked over tossed her bag behind the seat then sat down.
    I was just about to close the door when she stopped me. Looking up
at me she smiled and said. "Thanks again."
    "Don't mention it. It's the least I could do."







-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: Jeff Weitkamp <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Strangers.  Part 3
Date: 21 Jun 1998 10:48:55 -0700

Name:  Strangers
Author: Jeff W
E-Mail: [e-mail]
Feedback: Yes please. Tell me anything. Was is good, bad, or what.
Distribution: Please ask and I'll say yes.
Spoilers: Becoming 1 & 2
Summary: This is a Buffy only story dealing with her experiences soon
after Becoming 2
Rating: PG
Time line: After Becoming part 2
Disclaimer: Most of the characters in this story belong to Joss Wheadon
ect.

*********************************
Strangers   Part 3


 "I just can't believe you moving from LA to Nashville." I said. "I
would love to be back in LA."
    "Then you're from LA?" John asked.
    "But Nashville is in Tennessee." I said ignoring his question.
"That's so, so not LA."
    We had been driving for almost an hour. Just driving and talking.
John was real easy to talk to. I was enjoying myself too. It had been a
log time since I just sat and talked with anyone. It was real nice.
    "Have you ever been to Nashville?" He asked me.
    "Well no."
    "Have you ever even been east of the Rockies?"
    "I went to Seattle once with my parent's when I was eight. Does that
count?"
    "No it doesn't. And you changed the subject again." Said John
glancing at me out of the corner of his eye while he drove.
    I looked away for a second then said, "I used to live near LA. But I
moved a couple of years ago."
    "There. That wasn't so bad was it?"
    "No. I guess not." I answered.
    For a while we rode in silence. I sat there watching the highway
flash by.
    John broke the silence by saying, "If you've never been to Nashville
then how can you be so down on it."
    "Okay smart guy." I challenged. "What is so great about Nashville?"
    "It got everything that LA has. Except for the Traffic, and the
smog."
    "Well." I said. "What about an ocean?" I don't recall seeing an
ocean near by."
    "What difference does that make?"
    "Or Disneyland. They don't have Disneyland in Nashville do they?"
    "And we know no one can survive with out a yearly trip to
Disneyland. Right?" John said.
    "Right." I said. "It's right there in the LA teenager handbook. Page
21. Right after Shopping Malls, Picking the right one."
    "So." John asked. "When was the last time you were at Disneyland?"
    "It was three years ago. Just before..." I left the thought hang.
    "Just before what Bonnie?"
    I continued in a low voice. "Just before my parents divorced."
    "I'm sorry." John said. "I bet that was really hard on you."
    "Was hard?" I said. "Sometimes it still is hard.
    "So?" John asked. "Do you live with your mom or your dad?"
    "I live with my mom. Or lived that is."
    "Did you two have a fight?"
    "Oh yeah. We had quite a fight."
    "Did it involve a boy?"
    "Among other things."
    "Then you left?"
    "I'm sorry but I really don't feel like talking about this right
now." I said.
    "Sure no problem." John said. "You know I bet if you tilted that
seat back some, and closed you eyes you'd fall right to sleep."
    "That just may be a good idea." I said.
    John handed me his jacket and said, "You can use this as a pillow."
    "Thanks."
    After tilting the seat back I folded the jacket and put it under my
head. I sat back and closed my eyes. I really wasn't that tired, but I
figured that if John thought I was asleep he wouldn't ask me all those
hard questions.
    At some point I must have fallen asleep because the next thing I
remembered was John shaking me.
    "Bonnie. Bonnie, wake up."
    "Huh? Who?"  Was all I could manage at first. Then as I woke up, I
realized he was talking to me.
    "I'm up." I said. "What time is it? Where are we?"
    "It's about 11:30." John said. "I was getting pretty tired so I
stopped at this motel. I just finished checking us in."
    "You what?" I asked sitting up. "Now look. You've been nice and all
but don't you go thinking that just because..."
    "Whoa. Whoa girl. Calm down." John said holding up a key in each
hand. "We've got two separate rooms. See?"
    "Oh. I'm sorry." I said.
    "No problem." John said with a smile. "There are a lot of guys out
there that would have thought what you thought I was thinking. I think."

    "Come on." John said. "I'm ready for bed. Would you like me to get
your bag?"
    "No." I said. "It's not that big."
    "Okay." John said then he held up two keys and said, "We've got room
twelve and thirteen. I'll let you pick."
    "Then I'll choose lucky thirteen." I said.
    "You got it." John said as he handed me the key. Why don't we plan
on meeting at 8:00 am in the restaurant there."
    "Sounds like a plan. 8:00 am it is." I said taking the key.
    "I'll be next door if you need me." John said with a yawn.
    I unlocked the door and pushed it open. Found the light switch and
turned it on, then said, "Hey didn't I see this place on the cover of
'Modern Motel Monthly'?"
    John looked around and said, "Hey, I see a bed and a bathroom.
That's all I'm interested in right now."
    "That's what I like about you. You always focus on the essentials."
    John yawned again and said, "That's me. Mr. Focus."
    He turned around and unlocked the door to his room. "What do you
know?" he said. "Mine looks the same."
    "Good night John. Thanks for everything." I said.
    "Good night Bonnie. See you in the morning."
    I closed my door then waited until heard his door close. Then I
quietly opened the door and looked around outside. I didn't see anything
but it never hurts to be careful.
    I closed the door and put the chain on. Turing around I looked
around the room. Yep, I think. I'd call it modern ugly.
    I put my bag on the bed, took off my jacket, and sat down on the
bed. How long had it been since I slept in a bed? I don't want to think
about it.
    I sat there for a minute and wondered what would a real person do
now. Of course, I said.
    I grabbed my bag and got out what I needed, then headed for the
shower.
    Soon I had the water just right. I stepped in and directed the water
to the shower. I jumped when the first burst of cold water hit me. Soon
it was replaced with warmer water.
    I just stood there letting the water hit me in the face and head. It
felt so relaxing. It felt like the water running down my body took the
tension that had been inside with it.
    As my body began to relax, my mind began to wonder. Soon my thoughts
wondered to Sunnydale and everything that had happened all the way up
to...
    Then something inside finally let go. With a sob, I put my face into
may hands. Then the tears came. I sat down in the shower and cried. The
tears taking with them some of the emotional pain and tension like the
water of the shower did for my body.


---------------
    That next morning I get to the restaurant early and got a booth so I
could watch the motel. I sat there drinking a cup of coffee, and reading
the newspaper. This one I bought myself. I couldn't concentrate on the
paper because I kept looking up to see If Bonnie was on her way.
    By ten after eight, I was beginning to get a little nervous. Maybe
she had left during the night. Then I would tell myself to quit being
paranoid. Women are always late, right?
    By fifteen after eight, I was on my second cup of coffee and
wondering if I should get worried. I was trying harder to distract
myself with the paper but all I was managing to do was stare at one page
longer.
    I heard the bell on the door ring. I glanced up to see a very pretty
young girl that I didn't recognize. Annoyed I looked back at the motel.
Nothing there either. Feeling even more annoyed I stared at the paper
again.
    "Hi John."
    I looked up to see who spoke. Standing there looking at me was the
young girl who just walked in. I just looked at her for a second knowing
I should recognize her. Then it hit me.
    "Bonnie. Hi." I said. "Sit down. I almost didn't recognize you.
    Her hair was hanging down framing her face instead of being pulled
back in a ponytail. She was also wearing makeup. But that wasn't all.
Something about the way she carried herself. I could only describe it as
happier. Like some of the weight she had been carrying on her shoulders
had been lifted off.
    She slid into the seat across from me and said. "What. Do I look
that bad in the in the light of day?"
    "No, no. You look fine. Better. No not better. Just different."
    "I think the word you are looking for is clean."
    The only response I could make was a weak stammer.
    "That's okay. It was true." She smiled. "I must have been a mess. I
hadn't cared how I looked for a while."
    "Well I'm glad that you're feeling better." I said with a smile. "It
looks good on you."
    The waitress appeared at the table providing an excuse to drop the
current conversation.
    "Can I get you anything." Asked the waitress looking at Bonnie."
    "No Thanks." She said.
    "You must be hungry." I said.
    "Well maybe just some juice."
    "Really you must want more than that."
    "No really. Juice is fine. Could I get two parts orange and one part
grapefruit."
    "Sure." The waitress said.
    "Okay." I said. Then the waitress turned to me and I said, "How
about two eggs scrambled, a side of bacon, and toast. Got that."
    "Yes sir."
    "And the same for me." I said.
    "Anything else sir."
    "Not for me. How about you Bonnie?"
    She managed to smile and look annoyed at the same time and said. "No
that'll be fine."
    After the waitress left she said, "You didn't have to do that."
    "Why not. You're my guest. I can't let you go hungry."
    Then I smiled and said. "So how did you sleep last night?"
    She paused for a second and said "Fine. And now you're the one who
is changing the subject."
    "Oh, am I?" I said smiling.
    "Yes you are. You don't have to take care of me. You don't owe me
anything."
    "I don't owe you anything. I seem to recall having my life saved by
you yesterday. I think that's worth the price of a few meals."
    Bonnie started to say something but I interrupted and said,
"Please."
    Bonnie smiled and said. "Don't look at me with those sad puppy dog
eyes."
    I wasn't sure what she was talking about so I just continued to
stare.
    She laughed and said. "Okay, Okay. I give up."
    "Good I'm glad that's settled."
    "Now about last night. What really happened?"
    "Well you and that lady you called Carla had this fight and..."
    "No I mean what really happened?"
    "What do you think happened?"
    "Well there was this lady who got some kind of hold or trance over
me and was incredibly strong. Who grew these huge fangs. Bit me on the
neck and started to drink my blood."
    I looked at Bonnie who seemed content to let me continue.
    "Then suddenly she explodes into a cloud of dust. And when I look up
your standing there with something in your hand. I didn't get a good
look at it because you hid it to fast. But now I'm thinking it just may
have been a wooden stake."
    All Bonnie said was "And..."
    "And if this was something I was reading or seeing on TV, I would
say that what I saw was a vampire. But this isn't TV or some story that
somebody with an overactive imagination wrote, is it. And if I said I
saw a vampire I would sound pretty crazy, wouldn't I."
    Bonnie looked at me for a moment then said, "If you told that story
to most people they would say that you were crazy."
    "But." I asked, "What would you say?"
    Bonnie looked down at the table and said, "Me? I wouldn't say you
were crazy. But nobody listens to me."
    I looked at her letting the implications of what she said sink in.
We were interrupted from any further comment when the waitress arrived
with our food.
    We ate our food with little more being said between us besides pass
the salt, or may I have the butter for several minutes.
    Finally, I said. "Vampires huh. I wouldn't have believed it.
Anything like this ever happen to you before."
    Bonnie looked at me and said "Yeah you could say that."
    "Is that so? How often?"
    "More often than you'd think. But that's all I should say."
    I started to ask another question but she cut me off.
    "Really. You don't want to know."
    Something about the way she said that stopped me from pursuing the
subject any further.
    Fortunately the waitress showed up at that moment to refill the
coffee, and clear away some of the dishes.
    "So." I asked. "How long have you been on the road?"
    "A couple of weeks I guess. I kind of lost track."
    "That bad huh?"
    "Yeah that bad."
    "Feel like talking about it?" I asked.
    Bonnie looked at me with a weak smile and said. "No, not really, not
Yet."
    I looked outside and said. "Looks like a great day for driving."
    "I've been thinking about that." Bonnie said. "I really appreciate
everything you've done for me. But maybe it's best if I didn't go with
you."
    "Why, when we're getting along so well?"
    "I just don't want to be a burden."
    "Now who said you were a burden. I can't tell you how much I
appreciate your company." I said. "Not to mention the other benefits of
having you along."
    Bonnie gave me an angry look.
    "I mean the life saving stuff." I said. "Really."
    Bonnie looked at me and said. "I just don't think it's will work
out."
    "Look." I said. "I'm sorry. I'll stop bugging you about where you're
from and what you're running from. And why you refuse to talk about it.
I promise."
    "Do you really promise?"
    "Scouts honor."
    "Okay. Then you've got yourself a passenger."
    "Great." I said. Then I looked at my watch and said. "If you're done
with breakfast then it's about time to hit the road."





-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: Jeff Weitkamp <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Strangers Part 4
Date: 21 Jun 1998 10:51:35 -0700

Name:  Strangers
Author: Jeff W
E-Mail: [e-mail]
Feedback: Yes please. Tell me anything. Was is good, bad, or what.
Distribution: Please ask and I'll say yes.
Spoilers: Becoming 1 & 2
Summary: This is a Buffy only story dealing with her experiences soon
after Becoming 2
Rating: PG
Time line: After Becoming part 2
Disclaimer: Most of the characters in this story belong to Joss Wheadon
ect.

NOTE:   This part contains some vilonce. I don't think you will find it
to extreme. Besides the persons involved deserve a lot worse than they
recieve.

*********************************
Strangers   Part 4

"This is a very pretty drive in the day time." I said. "I'm glad you
talked me into it."
    "I'm glad I did too." John answered.
    We road in silence for a while. I was just enjoying the scenery.
Then John said. "What is it with these guys?"
    I looked behind us and saw a van with a bunch of guys is ridding our
bumper, flashing their lights and honking their horn.
    "Why don't they just go around?" John asked.
    "It's probably just a bunch or teenager boys." I said. "I think
between the age of fifteen and twenty-three the male animal loses all
sense of sanity."
    Finally John changed lanes to the left and the Van pulled up along
my side of the car. My guess was proved correct because the sliding door
opened and three boys stuck their heads and arms out waving and yelling.

    I saw a couple of beer cans in their hands and said. "Yep I was
right. And they're drinking too. Now we've gone past insane directly to
stupid."
    I ignored them and eventually they got bored and drove on ahead.
    "Good riddance." John said.
    The van pulled away from us but I noticed that about a quarter mile
ahead they had found another motorist in a little green compact to
harass. They stayed with the car for quite awhile. Either behind it or
to one side or the other.
    This went on for about fifteen minutes. Then I saw the green car
make a sudden swerve to the right into a roadside rest stop. The van
braked quickly and was able to slow enough to follow.
    I could tell something was wrong.
    As we neared the rest stop I said, "John pull into here."
    "Sure. Do you need a restroom break?"
    "No not exactly."
    As we neared the parking area, I could see the van and the green car
stopped with the doors standing open, but no one in sight.
    "Stop here." I said.
    "What's the matter?" John asked.
    "My guess is trouble."
    "Well what do you think we can do. There were five or six guys in
that van."
    "You stay here." I said. "I can handle this."
    "You can handle this? I can't let you go out there by yourself."
    "I don't have time to argue. I'm going, if you want to come fine.
Just stay behind me."
    "But."
    "I said stay behind me". Then I got out of the car.
    I heard the other car door open, then close. Then John walked up
beside me."
    I could hear the sound of laughter a short distance away.
    "Come on." I said as I headed towards the laughter.
    I got to the edge of the building and looked around. I could see a
group of six guys standing in a rough circle. In the middle was a girl
about twenty with straight red hair. They had tied her arms behind her
and put on a blindfolded.
    One of the guys would grab her. Get a good grope, then let her go
pushing her into the middle of the circle. When she would try to run one
of the others would catch her and take a turn. Great fun for all, all
except one that is.
    The red hair reminded me of Willow, but I quickly pushed that out of
my mind.
    I turned to John and said in a low voice, "I'll take care of these
guys. You get the girl."



    I just looked at Bonnie. How did she expect to take on these six
guys? I thought.
    But before I could say anything, she walked out from behind the
building.
    As she walked out no one noticed her. She walked up to about five
feet from the circle of boys and stood there with her hands on her hips.

    "Then she said, "Why the blindfold guys. Afraid you faces will make
her sick?"
    They all stopped laughing and turned to look at Bonnie. One of them
holding onto the girl.
    "Look guys. We have another guest come to join our little party."
One of them said.
    They began to move closer to surround her.
    "The way I see it guys is you got two choices." Bonnie said counting
on her fingers. "One. There's the easy way, which means you let her go
and hit the road right now. Or two, there's the hard way, which involves
lots of blood, broken limbs, and torn ligaments. All yours of course."
    "I'm leaving it up to you. But, I'm hopping you choose the hard
way."
    I couldn't believe she was talking like this to these guys. All she
was going to do was make them real mad.
    The tall blond guy standing right in front of Bonnie said. "Girlie
I'm going to enjoy hurting you."
    "Oh goodie. You've picked number two."
    Suddenly one guy charged at Bonnie from her right trying to grab
her. She ducked under the charge. Then as he went by she brought up her
knee and struck the guy a hard blow in the stomach doubling him over.
    Next another guy came from the other direction. Bonnie met his
charge with a stiff arm to his chest straightening him up. Then she
ducked down, spun around with her leg out, striking his legs from
behind, and out from underneath him. He fell striking the ground hard.
    Not pausing she stepped up to another man. A quick strike with one
fist and this one was down for the count.
    Then the blond guy who had threatened her wrapped his arms around
her from behind in a bear hug and lifter her from the ground.
    With out any sign of panic or concern Bonnie struck backwards with
her foot and hit him hard in the leg. He staggered and her feet were
back on the ground his arms still wrapped around her but not quite as
tight. Instantly she swung back with her elbow. The blow caught him in
the stomach driving the air out of him. Then reaching up she grabbed one
of his arms and bending forward easily flipping the guy over her and
onto his back.
    With a yell the first man who tried to attack her charged again.
Bonnie twisted and struck out with her foot catching him full in the
stomach. He doubled over in pain and staggered forward. Bonnie quickly
brought up a knee and hit him in the face. His head snapped back, then
he toppled forward.
    The last attacker stepped up and attempted to hit her with a
roundhouse kick. Bonnie grabbed his swinging foot stopping it cold. Then
she started to walk forward causing the man to hop backwards. She backed
him up until he almost tripped over one of his fallen cohorts. Then she
started to twist the leg while pushing back until he was twisted totally
off balance and fell.
    As he fell backwards, he put his hands out behind him in a natural
attempt to catch himself. He screamed in pain as he fell hard on one
hand possibly breaking the wrist or arm.
    Bonnie resumed a combat stance as she looked around to make sure
that none of her opponents had any fight left. The only response from
any of them was moans of pain, or gasping attempts to recover their
breath.
    Then he turned to the last guy who was still holding the girl who
was sobbing quietly.
    Bonnie looked at him for a moment. He just starred back with his
mouth hanging open with an amazed expression on his face that must have
been a near copy of mine.
    Then Bonnie made a palms up gesture and asked. "Are you going to
fight or what?"
    Her words brought him out of his trance. He immediately let the girl
go and put up his hands.
    The girl fell to her knees and started to cry louder.
    "Look Miss." The lone standing man said.  "I don't want no trouble."

    "Trouble you already got." Bonnie said.
    By this time I managed to regain myself and started over to help the
girl.
    I knelt next to the sobbing girl and said. "It's okay, you're safe
now."
    Then I started to remove the blindfold. Once it was off she looked
at me and started to get hysterical.
    I tried to calm her down by saying. "I'm not going to hurt you.
You're going to be safe."
    Bonnie noticed my trouble and come over and said, "Let me John. You
go get their ID's"
    Then she sat down by the girl, untied her hands, and began to calm
her down.
    Once the girl's hands were untied she grabbed Bonnie and began to
cry on her shoulder.
    I began to walk around the fallen and take any identification they
had.


----------
    "Are we clear on the plan now?" John was asking.
    Then he pointed at the only unhurt guy and said. "Tell me what you
are going to do."
    They were all too cowed or to hurt to offer any resistance.
    "I'm going to drive to the next town. Once there I'll find the
police and we will turn ourselves in."
    "That's right," said John. "And just remember that we will be close
behind you. And We have your ID's so If you don't turn yourselves in the
police will come looking for you. And I wouldn't want to be in your
shoes when they find you."
    They just stood there, starring at the ground.
    John tossed the keys to the guy who could drive and said. "Now get
out of here."
    They walked, limped or were carried to the van. Got in and drove
off.
    John came over to the bench where I sat with Lila the girl we
rescued. She had calmed down considerably and was drinking a soft drink
I found in a cooler in her car.
    "So, do you really think they will turn themselves in." I asked.
    "If they're are smart they will."
    Lila smiled at John and said. "I'm real sorry I acted the way I did
when you were trying to help me John."
    "Don't be." He replied. "For all you knew I was one of those jerks.
I totally understand."
    "Well thank you." She said. "Thank both of you."
    I smiled and said. "Your welcome. For the fiftieth time."
    Then making a decision, I said. "Lila. Could you wait here for a
minute? I need to talk to John."
    "Sure."
    John followed me to his car. I stood there for a moment and said, "I
can't go with you."
    "What do you mean." He said.
    I looked away and said. "I can't go with you to the police."
    "Why not?"
    "Because back home the police are looking for me. They think I did
something bad but I swear to you that I didn't."
    "Well then just tell them." He said.
    "It's not that easy. As a matter of fact it's very complicated."
    "But." John started.
    "John." I interrupted. "Please I just can't. Not now."
    "But how will I explain this?" He asked.
    "Tell them that I was with you one minute. Then you turned around
and I was gone."





-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: Jeff Weitkamp <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Strangers.   Part 5 Concoulsion.
Date: 21 Jun 1998 10:53:14 -0700

Name:  Strangers
Author: Jeff W
E-Mail: [e-mail]
Feedback: Yes please. Tell me anything. Was is good, bad, or what.
Distribution: Please ask and I'll say yes.
Spoilers: Becoming 1 & 2
Summary: This is a Buffy only story dealing with her experiences soon
after Becoming 2
Rating: PG
Time line: After Becoming part 2
Disclaimer: Most of the characters in this story belong to Joss Wheadon
ect.

*************************
Strangers.   Part 5 Concoulsion.


I couldn't believe what I was hearing. What could she have done that was
so bad? But I could tell that her mind was made up.
    "Well, at least let me give you a ride into town."
    "Sure." Bonnie said. "Let me see if Lila is ready. Then I'll tell
her that we will follow her into town."
    Bonnie walked over to Lila and sat on the bench next her and they
began to talk.
    I tried to think about what I could do for Bonnie. I couldn't think
of anything. I knew that she wouldn't take any money.
    Then I got an idea. I got $200 dollars from my wallet. Then I
reached into the backseat for Bonnie's jacket. I put the money in one of
the side pockets. Hopefully she wouldn't discover it until it was too
late.
    When I got back out of the car Bonnie and Lila had stood up and
walked to Lila's car still talking. Then they hugged and Lila got into
her car.
    Bonnie walker over to me and got into the car. I did the same.
    "After the doors closed Bonnie said. "She'll meet you at the
hospital in town."
    "What did you tell her about you?" I asked.
    "I said you had to drop me off before we got there."
    I started the car and waited for Lila to pull out. Then I followed
her.
    We drove in silence for a while. Then Bonnie said. "A friend of mine
was killed. I had just found her. Then the police got there and assumed
I did it. But I didn't I swear to you I didn't."
    "I believe you." I said.
    "Thank you." She said quietly. "I just wanted you to know."
    Thanks." Was all I could think of to say.
    In ten minutes, we were in town. I pulled into a parking lot and
said to Bonnie. "How's this?"
    "This is fine." She said. "I can't thank you enough."
    "And I thank you." I said smiling as I got out of the car.
    Bonnie got out then reached into the back seat and grabbed her bag
and jacket. Then she walked around to my side of the car.
    "Where will you go?" I asked.
    "I don't know," she said. "I'm not even sure where I am."
    "Well." I said. "See that intersection there."
    Bonnie looked back and said, "Yes."
    "Well if you go left there you will head west back towards home. If
you go right, you'll be heading east. Away from home and all your
problems."
    Bonnie smiled. "Thanks again."
    Then with her eyes getting a little moist she grabbed me in a tight
hug. I hugged back and blinked back a tear of my own.
    "You take care of yourself." I said.
    Bonnie released me and said. "You to." Then she kissed me on the
cheek.
    Then I reached for my wallet and said. "Here you'll need some
money."
    "No John. I won't take it. You've done more than enough for me
already."
    "But." I said.
    "John. You wouldn't make me hurt you, would you?" She said smiling.
    "Well since you put it that way." I said putting my wallet away. I
should have been an actor I thought.
    "I do." Bonnie replied.
    "Now if you are ever in Nashville look me up."
    Bonnie smiled and said. "I will. Thanks again."
    Then she opened her bag and stuffed her jacket in side.
    Good I thought. She won't find the money for a while.
    Then with a wave she picked up the bag. Turned around and headed
towards the intersection.
    In a moment, she reached it. She paused for a moment looking left
and right. Then she looked left and right again obviously trying to
decide which way to go.
    I got into the car. Then looked back at Bonnie still standing there
looking left and right.
    I crossed my fingers and thought to myself. Go left little girl. Go
home and face your problems. You're too young to be out on your own like
this. You should be worrying about where to shop, or who will ask you to
the big dance. Not where you will sleep. Or where your next meal is come
from.
    I started to drive off but I stopped. I had to watch to see which
way she would go.


------

    I stood at the intersection looking left and right. I couldn't
decide if I should go left, and back to Sunnydale? Or right away from
Sunnydale and everything else?
    Left or right, which would it be Buffy?
    Left would take me to home where I have a mom who hates me. Where I
am in constant danger and put my friends in danger. And where Everything
I see there will remind me of Angel. And every time I think of Angel, I
will remember how I betrayed him.
    Right will take me away from Sunnydale, all the pain, and all the
danger. But could I run away forever?
    The time with John had been good. I thought about things other than
my problems for a change. I also managed to do some real thinking about
my problems.
    I also helped two people out of very bad situations. I guess no
matter where I go I'll always be the slayer. Killer of vampires and
demons. Protector of the masses.
    I looked left and right again. Which would it be Summers? Turn left
and go west? Or turn right and go east.
    Finally, I made up my mind. I picked up my bag with all my worldly
possessions and walked straight ahead to the north. Not west and not
east.
    Why? I'm not totally sure. I guess that I've decided that I haven't
healed yet. There was still a lot of emotional damage to repair. Many
things to sort out in my mind.
    I may not have healed but I think that now I'm at least ready to
start the healing process.

                 The End.





-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC:Time Heals All 1/1
Date: 21 Jun 1998 13:33:54 EDT

Title~ Time Heals All 1/1
Author~ Shani ([e-mail])
Spoilers~ Becoming I and II
Summary/authors note~ I am a General Hospital addict, as well as a Buffy
addict.  A GH character, Brenda Barrett (Vanessa Marcil) performed this
monologue that I thought would work really well with BuffyÆs feelings after
the events in Becoming I & II.  This is not the exact monologue, IÆve changed
it around a bit to fit with the story.
Disclaimer~ Buffy and co. are property of Joss Whendon, Sandollar Productions,
etc...

  Time Heals All

    She felt as though she were living some one elseÆs life.  In a way, she
supposed that it was true.  She had become some one else.  Well, she had
tried.

                    *    *    *
    ôHold on a æsec!ö Pike yelled at who ever was knocking so loudly at his
apartment door.  He pulled on a tee-shirt and yawned as he opened the door.
    ôBuffy!  What are you doing here?!?  Is everything ok?  Come in,ö he said,
now happy he had decided not to ignore his visitor.

                    *    *    *
    She and Pike had talked for a long time.  They had talked about old times,
new adventures and her reasonÆs for leaving.  Buffy stopped.  She sat down,
recalling what has happened.

                    *    *    *
    Buffy laughed.  ôSo, I guess to sum it all up, IÆm no longer Buffy,ö she
said.
    ôWhat?  IÆm not quite sure what you mean,ö a now very confused Pike
responded.
    Buffy looked at him for a moment.  ôUm, k...well itÆs like I made up this
character and now I going to *be* this character,ö she began to explain.
    Pike interupted.  ôCan you show her to me.  The character you want to be I
mean.ö
    Buffy looked down.  ôAlright.  well, sheÆs a young woman who woke up one
morning and said to herself, æIÆm going to leave.  After breakfast IÆm just
going ot walk out my door and go to a bus...or a planeÆ and she went.ö
    ôWhere did she go?ö Pike said, trying to understand what Buffy wanted, where
she planned on going.
    ôAnywhere.  As long as itÆs by the ocean.ö Buffy answered without hesitation.
    ôWhy does she want to go?  What does she think will happen?ö Pike again
interupted.
    ôNo one will miss me,ö she began.  At first, Pike was unsure whether Buffy
was referring to herslf or the character.  ôFor days probably.  And it just
wonÆt matter because IÆll be alone, in a house on the beach.  Free from
everything, free of dissapointment.  And years will pass...and I wonÆt even
notice because thereÆll be no pain to mark the time.ö  Buffy looked as if she
were in a far off place.  Finally Pike understood.  She wasnÆt Buffy.  SheÆs
wasnÆt talking about this character.  Right now, Buffy was the character.
    ôNo line from one day to the next.  Only the bookes that I read.  And the
characters will be my only acquaintances.  Just fantasy people, with no
concerns beyond the pages of their story.  And...theyÆll be so real to me.
More real than anyone in the town, who wonÆt even know me.  IÆll just listen
to them, and they wonÆt even notice that  my hair has turned white, and that I
have lines on my face.  They wonÆt even notice that IÆve become an old woman.
And one day, IÆm going to wake up, and I wonÆt remember why I left.  I wonÆt
remember if I took a bus...or a plane.  IÆll wake up and believe that IÆve
alwys been there.  And thatÆs the day, that I will step onto the sand...and
walk into the water.  And the waves...will just boil arouns me.  And the water
is so warm.  And theyÆll pick me up and carry me.  And IÆll leave again.  This
time foreve.  Gone without a trace.ö  Buffy looked at Pike.  Several tears ran
down her face.
    ôHh..mmm..uh....ö was all Pike could say.  He didnÆt know what to say to the
broken slayer.  She couldnÆt just walk away.  He knew it, and she would need
to realize that too.

                    *    *    *
    She realized that now.  She couldnÆt be that fanasy person.  She was the
slayer.  She would return to her watcher, her mother, her friends, her pain,
and her memories.  And they would pass.  Time would heal her wounds.
Something still bothered her about her visit with Pike.

                    *    *    *
    ôBuffy,ö a soft voice whispered.   She knew whose voice it was.  She would
recognize it anywhere.
    ôAngel?  Where are you?ö  Buffy called into the darkness.  She couldnÆt
figure out where he was, where he had been.  The memories hit her like a punch
in the stomach.  He was in Hell.  She had sent him to Hell.
    ôNo,ö his voice soothed.  ôItÆs not your fault.  Come home, Buff.  Come back
to me.ö
    ôWhere are you?!?ö she called frentically.
    ôWaiting.ö
    Buffy woke up frantic and crying.  She was unable to shake the feeling that
something had changed.

                    *    *    *
    She was still unable to shake the feeling as she entered Sunnydale.  She walk
blindly.  She found herslf in front of his house.  The feeling was stronger
here.  She opened the door, slowly and carefully.  Trying to prepare for the
pain the apartment would cause.

                    *    *    *
    æShe knowsÆ he thought to himself as he waited.  She may not know she knows,
but she knows.  Just then, Angel turned to see the door slowly open.  A smile
crossed his face.  They had a lot to discuss, but it would work out.  It had
to, look at all theyÆve been through.  He watched her face go from pained to
shocked.  He hald out his hand to her.  They needed to talk.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  The End ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Feed back please!!   This is my first post.



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: <[e-mail]>
Subject: Re: BUFFYFIC: Monsters (1/1)
Date: 21 Jun 1998 14:01:43 EDT

if anyone on the buffyfic list actually gets this, could you please send any
fic from 6/16-today to me please??  I accidentally deleted all of my
mail.(Brilliant, huh?)
                             thankyou so much!
                                **Heather**(aka idiot girl)



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: [e-mail] (Charity C. T.)
Subject: BUFFYFIC: In Opacitatem Habitant Modo (1/1)
Date: 21 Jun 1998 14:51:12 -0700

Name: In Opacitatem Habitant Modo
Author: Taygeta
Address: [e-mail]
Feedback: Pretty Please with a cherry on top!
Uses in anything: Sure, but tell me first.
Spoiler: None
Disclaimer: The Buffy characters portrayed in this story and any other
references to Buffy the Vampire Slayer are the property of its creater
Joss Whedon, and its owners Mutant Enemy productions, Kuzui Productions,
Sandollar Productions, and 20th Century Fox.
Rating: PG

*****************************
In Opacitatem Habitant Modo
By: Taygeta

    I see blackness for there is nothing else to see.  A cold and
lonely world inside this head of mine, in which I am left to exist upon
and salvage for images of memories long ago dead.  What I would give to
see even the tiniest break of light in this dreary realm.  To view a
faceàan image, but all I can do is see the murkiness of the confined
spaces of my mind.

    So quickly had the light from my world dimmed, as if the on/off
switch of my eyes had been ripped from within meàleaving me with a fading
bulb of which to dwell upon until what was left was no more.  My present,
muddled state, I owe to thisàthe dying of the light.

    Lying on my bed, I feel the warmth of the black sun upon my skin
through the window of my room, but such rays of sunshine do not penetrate
to where the coldness liesàwhere the hatred has become solid ice.  My
angeràmy furyàI'm beginning to wonder, if these are what sustains me
because it seems that they are all I have left of the yesteryear.  My
anger and my fury are the only two things I have always been able to rely
upon because they have remained so consistent in all my years.

    I turned my head to the sound of the opening of my bedroom door,
although my eyes cannot see the person intruding on my desolate
domicileàforce of habit, I suppose.  For some bizarre reason all my
senses, especially that of hearing, have been heightened to some
impossible level, but I don't want these heightened senses.  I want the
senses I had beforeàI want my eyesàand to seeàto beàlike the Buffy
Summers that had lived before her succumbing confrontation with evil.

    The visit was briefàa friend of a friend, I think that person
was, who came to say that they were sorry for what had occurred.  All
visits to my domain were brief as if no one could stand to look at meàas
if I was a creature to fear, but they have the most to fear.  They are
the ones who are not protected from the demons that took the sun away,
because I'm not there to protect them.

    A blind slayeràno one had ever thought it possibleàall those that
knew of the slayer always thought that their powers healed them rapidly,
but my eyes have been gone for a month, and still I have no sight.  It is
just possible that there are even some ailments that even the powers of a
slayer can't heal.

    I know Giles is still hoping, still readingàeven praying that my
eyes return to me, but I think even his hopes have faltered.  They didn't
know but I heard them when they read the prophecy in one of Giles' textsà

    à  "Willow, Xander, Cordelia," I had heard Giles approach my
friends from where I sat in my hospital bed.

    "G-man, what's the word?"  Xander concerned voice followed, "Did
you read anything good in those books of yours?"

    "She's going to get her sight back, right?"  Willow asked in a
hopeful tone.

    I heard hesitation in Giles' voice before he said, "W-wellàI'm
not sureà" and then I heard the sound of leafing pages follow, "This
passage read, 'The darkness shall overtake her, and rob her of the light.
 Her sight taken, her battle still to come, and whether it be win or
lose, she will live in darkness and if that be, than we live only in
darkness.'"

    Willow's voice was a hushed whisper as she read the Latin words
that ended the phrase, "In opacitatem habitant modoà"

    àThose echo to me in my sleep, and that conversation so
inadvertently heard haunts me in nightmares and the darkest of daydreams.
 Through them, I have given up all hope of seeing, but hope is not lost
in the battle against that which took my eyes from me.  I will fightàas
it said I would, and I will win because losing isn't possible.  My eyes
may be gone, but my fight isn't gone, and if I can't see with my eyes,
I'll just have to make do with what's left of my heart.

********************
The End
Feedback...anyone?

_____________________________________________________________________
You don't need to buy Internet access to use free Internet e-mail.
Get completely free e-mail from Juno at http://www.juno.com
Or call Juno at (800) 654-JUNO [654-5866]



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: <[e-mail]>
Subject: Discuss: Re: BUFFYFIC: In Opacitatem Habitant Modo (1/1)
Date: 21 Jun 1998 19:00:26 EDT

Interesting story...the beginning read almost like a poem, or song, rather
than prose. I'd be interested to know how it happened, tho.

R



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: Wirchler <[e-mail]>
Subject: Re: Discuss: BUFFYFIC: In Opacitatem Habitant Modo (1/1)
Date: 21 Jun 1998 19:26:41 -0700

[e-mail] wrote:
>
> Interesting story...the beginning read almost like a poem, or song, rather
> than prose. I'd be interested to know how it happened, tho.
>
> R

So would I.  I'd like to know what happens after that as well.....it
certainly leaves itself open to continuation......what the conflict is,
the results, etc.

Is that really the end, or are you just going to leave us hanging?  :)
--
Wirchler
[e-mail]

Note to self:  If someone asks if you're a god, you say yes!!



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: _-Sun-_ <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Charlotte Sometimes (Part 37)
Date: 21 Jun 1998 23:33:39 -0700

Charlotte Sometimes (Part 37)

    He came towards her.
    Saying words she could only make out as blurs. Sorry's, or remorseful
sayings. Apologizing for unintentionally hurting her.
    She felt her body relax, as she slumped against the wall.
    There were less than a handful of words that could describe her
feelings. And the most common rang out. Alone. What had she gotten
herself into?

He was closer. She couldn't remember him moving, but he was closer now.
Everything was closer! The walls had moved, but didn't. The window's
were smaller, and yet the same. How did she get boxed in? What had she
done to deserve this?
Drusilla panicked, Her body shacking, screaming, crying, franticly she
clenched the long fabric hanging down and with all her might pulled,
trying to get up, get away.

    She saw the sun shine in her head, before the room was engulfed.

    Angelus's screams were etched into her mind, echoing as she looked
outside.
    She stood, He was gone, the sunlight... It had driven him away...
    She scrambled to the window. Looking back at the door fearful he might
return. The door was broken in, shattered and laying on the floor in
pieces.
    Drusilla reacted quickly though, pulling the thick glass upwards. She
scrambled out the window, tearing holes in her legs as she tried to fit
through the rectangular opening. She eventually got through, shaken and
torn a bit. But on her way downwards   managed to catch her skirt on the
nails on the roof...

    "Drusilla?" a voice echoed behind her.
    She yanked her head back, to see Angelus standing nearer to the doorway
concealed in shadows. She stared at him, frozen in horror for a second,
and then just scared. Safe, and scared.
    Angelus shook his head. "Don't go."

    Drusilla pulled on the tattered dress, ripping it and sending her onto
the roof.
    She stood outside the house, on top of the cabin. Unstable as she was,
Drusilla began to giggle, spinning in circles.
For the first time in what seemed like forever she was engulfed in
sunlight. For the first time in what seemed like forever she felt safe,
and what made that so magical was that as long as the daylight shone
brightly she *was* safe.

Without much less than a backwards glance Drusilla rolled herself to the
edge of the roofing, painfully stretching her stomach until she could
feel the tips of her toes hitting the floor and she dropped.
    Pain shot through her body, from her ankle, from her waist, from her
ribs. But never had pain ever felt so good...

*

    Angelus kicked the chair as he paced the small cabin back and forth.
The chair broke in a couple places, splintering. And he was trapped.
Trapped by the cursed daytime sun.
    How had he managed to let her get away?
    After years and years of experience? Supernatural strength even, and
she - the towns demon/witch Drusilla - had gotten the best of him.

    Angelus' fist connected with the wall, leaving a dent much larger than
his fist, and a hiss escaped through fanged teeth.
    He had to get to her. She was wounded. How far could she make it? Did
she even know where she was?
    Angelus fell down into the broken chair, sleep coming quickly. He knew
it would - and though unbidden it was not unwelcome.
    He would awake at the first ray of sunshine gone over the hilltops, and
seek out to reclaim his Drusilla.
    A nice thought before he fell into unnatural sleep was of her. Of her
strength, and will. Of her courage, and grace, and beauty.
    And of the look on her face, before she disappeared in the sun...


--
_-SuN-_

SD - Http://home.earthlink.net/~kbleyle/SD/index.html
K  - http://home.earthlink.net/~kbleyle/kinky/

    Daylight licked me into shape, I must have been asleep for
days. And moving lips to breathe her name, I opened up my eyes
And found myself alone alone. Alone above a raging sea
That stole the only girl I loved, And drowned her deep inside
of me (The Cure)

_ - _Spikette _ Dru's Dolly - Mercenary_ - _
  _ - _ Head Dominatrix in the Evil _ - _
_ - _   Plan For World Domination, _ - _
  _ - _ With Chains and Stuff _ - _



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: [e-mail] (Charity C. T.)
Subject: Re: Discuss: BUFFYFIC: In Opacitatem Habitant Modo (1/1)
Date: 22 Jun 1998 02:23:18 -0700


On Sun, 21 Jun 1998 19:26:41 -0700 Wirchler <[e-mail]>
writes:
>[e-mail] wrote:
>>
>> Interesting story...the beginning read almost like a poem, or song,
>rather
>> than prose. I'd be interested to know how it happened, tho.
>>
>> R
>
>So would I.  I'd like to know what happens after that as well.....it
>certainly leaves itself open to continuation......what the conflict
>is,
>the results, etc.
>
>Is that really the end, or are you just going to leave us hanging?  :)
>--
>Wirchler
>[e-mail]
>
>Note to self:  If someone asks if you're a god, you say yes!!
>

It was suppose to be a one time deal, but since I've gotten feedback
requesting for more. I won't leave you hanging.  So better to change it
to In Opacitatem Habitant Modo #1.  I'll explain through other
characters, so the first person bit will change with every story.  I'll
write it so the POV will be understandable for the transition of
characters.  I think I might pull a William Faulkner for the ending and
have everyone's POV together.

Thanks for the comments,
Charity
aka
Taygeta
Writer of "Capeside:the Hellmouth," "My Moria," "Chronicles of the White
Knight," "Elan Vital," "BSC:Freshman," "Summer Waves," "The Summer
After," and "Beyond the Creek."

Co-president of the Buffy-Xander Lovers Club
To Join, fill out the form at:
http://www.geocities.com/TelevisionCity/Set/9257/bxlclub.html

Keeper of Xander's quote, "People don't fall in love with what's right in
front of them. People want the dream-what they can't have. The more
unattainable, the more attractive."
Keeper of Xander's awkward moment with Buffy  (Phases)
Keeper of Xander's ability to put together a M-16 in 57 seconds

"She wasn't you...when I was about to be trampled by those bulls, all I
could think about was that I would never see you again," -Richard to
Caroline
"Mulder, I wouldn't put myself on the line for anyone, but you," -Scully
"Our love is like a rose...beautiful when in bloom, but it'll never
last," Tuxedo Mask to Sailormoon
"She's everything," -Dawson about Joey
"Everything I've ever done has been for you!" Ethan Hawke in Great
Expectations.
"To whisper in your ears...words that are old as time..." -Celine Dion,
"I Love You"
"...we are still innocent...it's easy we are faltered, doesn't matter..."
- Sarah Mclachlan, "Adia"
"Don't tell me you can't love me - you can - you must - why Emily" - his
eyes had met the moonlit brilliance of hers for a moment - "you *do*." ~
from L. M. Montgomery's Emily Novels: "Emily's Quest"

_____________________________________________________________________
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Get completely free e-mail from Juno at http://www.juno.com
Or call Juno at (800) 654-JUNO [654-5866]



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "Mark Jones" <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: BUFFYFIC   Diaries - Buffy1
Date: 21 Jun 1998 22:05:25 +0100

I haven't written any fic for a while, so some feedback, be it good bad, or
just ugly would be nice!
[e-mail]

Disclaimer:  They aren't mine
Summary:  Just a quick peek in Buffys diary, nothings gone wrong ,
everythings fine!



Dear Diary,
ItÆs strange, today was one of the most normal days that IÆve had for ages,
but to most people it would have been totally weird.
School was not really important, Giles was in mega research mode, according
to him something big is supposed to happen next month, and heÆs all
ôItÆs better to be preparedàö
I guess heÆs right, life would be good if it was all mapped out.  I wonder
what it would be like to be a ænormalÆ person, with no complications, no
vampires and no Hellmouth, but then again what about the feeling of not
knowing, the feeling that something could happen and that I can save peoples
lives, I would miss being different.  And most of all, Angel, it would be
totally different, would I know that heÆs a vampire, or would I just be
forever wondering why we never meet in the day.  If I was a ænormalÆ person,
who would the slayer be?  Willow?  No, too sensible, Xander?  No, I donÆt
know why, thereÆs just something about him, maybe it would be Cordelia?  I
donÆt know why but she strikes me as the kinda person who is not just the
kind of person she shows herself to be.  I wonder what it would be like for
Giles, would it be easier?  Harder?
What about me, where would I be?  ItÆs strange how one person can affect
other peopleÆs lives, only realising how when they think about what it would
be like without themselves.
Goodnight Diary,
Buffy.

By Rachel Jones.
I was thinking about extending this to the other characters, and making it
into a kinda mini series, what do u think?
[e-mail]




-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: Wirchler <[e-mail]>
Subject: Re: BUFFYFIC: BUFFYFIC   Diaries - Buffy1
Date: 22 Jun 1998 09:27:45 -0700

Mark Jones wrote:
>
<snip>
>
> By Rachel Jones.
> I was thinking about extending this to the other characters, and making it
> into a kinda mini series, what do u think?
> [e-mail]

Why not?  It certainly might be fun to create the 'insights' of Xander,
Willow, Cordelia, and even Oz and Giles......  Cordelia is vain enough,
Giles retentive enough.....  :)

What about a diary 'series'?  I think it's a great idea.....  just my
thoughts on the matter......
--
Wirchler
[e-mail]

Note to self:  If someone asks if you're a god, you say yes!!



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: "Syndicate: Holding On To The Night"
Date: 22 Jun 1998 12:42:35 EDT

Notes: This takes place after the last Syndicate story I posted, "Syndicate:
Termination", but you don't need to read the first to get this one, at least I
don't think so. If you'd like to see it, e-mail me at [e-mail] and
I'll mail it off. It also takes place after "Becoming II".
Disclaimers: The Syndicate and its players (except for Snyder) are mine and
may not be used without my permission. The rest is Joss' and I don't control
it.
Feedback: Yes, please!

~

                    "Holding On To The Night"
                         By Rachel Brody

     She felt the tears running down her cheeks, knew there was
something wrong with what she was doing-- running. She knew she
should never have done this, and some part of her even sincerely
regretted having taken the actions she'd taken so far.
     But she couldn't let this go. She couldn't let go of
everything she'd done, she couldn't let go of the memories, and she
couldn't let go of the people she cared about. Which meant she had
to leave it all, so it wouldn't be ripped from her grasp like
everything else she had ever cared about.
     Buffy felt her breath catch in her throat as she choked on
another sob, her legs curling up beneath her on the bus seat, her
bag next to her, praying there would be some way to keep from
showing the rest of the world what she felt.
     The bus had been driving for nearly a day now, with breaks
every few hours. She hadn't looked up the entire time. She knew
eventually she would reach her destination, but when that would be
she didn't know. She hadn't even paid attention when she'd bought
the ticket, she had just asked for whatever ticket it was her money
would buy. Fate could spin the wheel of chance for her, she had
decided as she'd tried to decide on where to go. Fate had covered
everything else in her life, up to now. Maybe it would be best if
she let it keep going like that, didn't try to make an effort to
direct her own life.
     So she had left, deciding that if fate had wanted her to stay,
it wouldn't have stolen everything she loved. Her mother, her
friends, her life. She wouldn't let herself think of the last thing
she'd lost, or she would never be able to find the ability to carry
on.
     "Miss," came a voice from the aisle, "is this seat occupied?"
     Buffy looked up, knowing her eyes were red from tears, knowing
she was presenting the perfect picture of a classic runaway.
     The man who had spoken looked to be in his early-to-mid-
twenties, wearing a leather jacket, with long, blonde hair that was
pulled back into a ponytail. He presented a certain appearance
of breeding and flair that made her wary of believing that he was
simply another guy off the streets.
     She shrugged and picked up her bag, putting it at her feet and
making room, not saying anything for fear that her voice might
break.
     He watched her, and although her eyes were on the scene
passing by outside the window as the bus pulled away from the
station, she could feel his eyes on her. Just as she began to get
the feeling that she'd just as soon have him speak and get it over
with, she heard his voice.
     "A bit young to be traveling by yourself, one might think."
     She looked back at him, glaring.
     He smiled slightly, as though he was amused by her anger. "And
yet, you seem as though you would be too sensible a young woman to
do something which would put you in danger." His smile widened.
"Which might lead one to ask, what is it about you that makes you
think you can handle whatever is thrown your way?" He waited a long
few seconds, but when Buffy refrained from answering, he shrugged
and nodded toward her duffle bag. "Adolescents are the same in any
era, aren't they." He shook his head. "We run from that which we
are loathe to face, and yet somehow it always returns to haunt us."
     "Excuse me," Buffy finally managed to say, almost keeping her
voice from trembling, "but I'd kind of prefer if you shut the hell
up and leave me alone."
     "Very well," he said, "I can be quiet, of course, and yet
somehow I doubt very much that you'll ever find yourself left
alone, at least until you face whatever demons it is you're running
from." He smirked slightly, pulling the sunglasses down slightly so
he was peering at her over them, his eyes bright and quick. "Your
aura, my dear, is simply breathtaking."
     "My _aura_?" she hissed, nearly snapping in his face.
     "Yes," he replied. Then he smiled, pulling a small wad of
bills from a pocket she hadn't previously noticed. "Here," he said,
"young Slayer."
     Her suspicion growing by orders of magnitude, Buffy's eyes
narrowed slightly. "How do you--"
     "How do I know who you are?" The man smiled slightly, shaking
his head and pulling a business card from nowhere. "Newell
Burbank," he said with a smile, passing her the small piece of
stiff paper.
     She glanced over it, raising an eyebrow when she saw the logo.
A burning cross. "Tasteful," she said, giving him a sour smile.
     "Isn't it, though?"
     "And what kind of name is the Syndicate?" she asked, her voice
holding no trace of humor.
     "A worthy one," he said with a shrug. Then he smiled slightly.
"You may keep the card, young Slayer," he said as the bus pulled
to a stop and pressing the bills into her palm. "As well as the money.
And...you might think of lightening up on yourself, Slayer. You've
been screwed over, time and again, I know." The smile widened
as Buffy glanced to the window and realized they had hit the end of
the line. "Think of this as a new beginning," Burbank told her. "A
chance to live without those bastards screwing you to the wall every
chance they get. You're free."
     Not wanting to admit that his words made a certain amount of
sense, Buffy reached under the seat to grab her duffle.
     "And feel free to contact me. Whenever you wish."
     "Thanks," Buffy said, dragging her duffle out from under the
seat, "but I think I'll--"
     She broke off abruptly as she straightened and stood,
realizing that Newell Burbank had vanished.
     Confused, with a sigh, Buffy moved toward the bus doors, not
bothering to look at the sign that hung overhead as she walked out
of the bus depot. She didn't care where she was, only that it
wasn't Sunnydale. She could feel the tears she had been crying
earlier, dried on her cheeks, and made a swipe at them, realizing
that suddenly she didn't feel quite so much like crying.
     Looking around, Buffy smiled to herself, just a little. Free,
she thought to herself, tasting the word with her mind. Burbank,
wherever he had gone to, was at least right in that respect. They
were all free. She, from her obligations, and maybe one day from
the guilt that tailed her wherever she walked. The rest of them,
from getting hurt by the things she had done to them.
     Maybe she would finally be able to start over, she thought as
she left the bus terminal and started scouting for a cheap hotel,
somewhere she could go where she wouldn't deplete the money she had
withdrawn from her credit account and her savings account before
she'd left Sunnydale.
     Not wanting to litter, but having no use for Burbank's card,
Buffy simply slid it into her jeans pocket, promptly forgetting it
had ever existed as she walked, ready for once in her life to meet
whatever destiny she might find, because now she knew whatever it
was, she would have had some say in selecting it. No longer was she
going to be the pawn of some nameless, faceless organization that
had simply stepped into her life one day and told her what to do.
No, she was going to take a stand, have her say. She refused to let
the Watcher Network trample her into the ground under their high-
minded objectives, and she vowed to herself she wouldn't let them
set her up to get hurt like she had been.
     For the first time in a long time, as Buffy walked, she felt
like she might finally be regaining some sort of control over the
crazy phenomenon she liked to call her life.

THE END
(for now)

Comments to [e-mail], please.



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "Mark Jones" <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC:  Diaries
Date: 22 Jun 1998 20:24:31 +0100

Hi!
This is Willows diary, I've decided to make this into a kind of mini series
and have all the characters think about what life would be like with out
them...

Disclaimer:  They aren't mine.
Summary:  A quick look in Willows diary, none of the bad stuff has happened.
Feedback:  Yes, yes, yes!!  I need to know what you think, so I can make the
next parts better!  Please!  [e-mail]

DIARIES - WILLOW
***********************
Dear Diary,
ItÆs me, the ever so helpful assistant to Buffy.  When you think about it,
thatÆs all I am.  BuffyÆs assistant.  If she needs help I give it to her,
when research has to be done, I help do it, without me they would be fine.
Everyone chips in with research, everyone helps Buffy, IÆm not unique.
Xander has his jokes, BuffyÆs the Slayer, Giles the watcher, AngelÆs the
Vamp and Cordelia has the one thing IÆve always wanted û Xander.  Without me
everyone would be fine.  ItÆs strange to think that I have such little
effect on everyone.  I wish I did, I wish I was just a bit special, a bit
unique.
Oz is great though, I guess he must find me a bit special, a bit important,
or why else are we together?  But, is he the one that I really want, do I
still want Xander?????  Even though we are best friends and both seeing
other people, I would love to be with him.  If only he knewàbut what about
Oz?
Life can be so tough, I mean I found today pretty normal, yet we researched
about demons from the Middle Ages that could come back to terrorise
Sunnydale, I mean is that actually normal?  If anyone knew we did this, weÆd
probably all be put in the nut-house!
Life is so complicated, I think the others are right when they tell me not
to think so much!
Goodnight,
Willow.
************************

Feedback please!  It's ever so important to me!
[e-mail]




-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "Sara Barton" <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Reflections  (1/1)
Date: 22 Jun 1998 14:11:00 PDT

Title:  Reflections
Author: Sara B. [e-mail]
Note: This is just a little peice that I wrote.  I just finished it
today, and thought I'd send it to the list.  I have been so busy lately
that I haven't been able to read or write fiction, so I've been a little
cranky lately.  Anyway, just tell me what you think of it.


Reflections  (1/1)

He stared into the mirror; the aged eyes never leaving, never blinking.
As if in a daze, he would just sit and stare for hours on end like there
was no other world around him.  His eyes intent, he searched for
something--anything.  He prayed to for a glimpse...a small image of what
he had so long lost but never forgotten.  This was all he had left to
do.

He was alone.  He was lost.  He had nothing at all.  He often wondered
why he continued to live.  What was the point?  He had nothing to live
for.  But something kept him alive.  Was it faith?  No, he had not
faith.  He lost it when he lost himself.

He lived alone in grief.  A mirage of angst and suffering.  It had been
this way for so long.  He was in more pain that he ever thought humanly
possible.  It was more intense everyday like a throbbing wound that
infected his body and soul.  It plagued him day and night, never letting
him have a moments peace.  He suffered in a vicious misery.

As he stared into the dusty mirror, searching for a sign of himself as a
person, all he could see was his reflection.  But it wasnÆt his; it was
the reflection of every soul--every innocent man, woman, and child that
he took the life of.  It was the reflections of his victims.  Thousands
of them flashed before his eyes in that mirror; their faces etched in
his mind.  Those faces filled with the terror and the horror and the
agony that he had so carelessly inflicted upon their lives before
killing them.

Everyday he would watch the reflections stare at him.  The haunting
vision of their pleading eyes so vivid. Guilt throbbed inside him,
tearing at his insides like sharp claws.  Their blood poured from his
soul like the tears that fell from his eyes.  Their cries pounding in
his ears like the sobs that trembled in his body.  Their last breath so
hot on his neck like the ones he wished he had.

This was what it was all about.  Pain.  Suffering.  Agony.  That is the
way they made it to be.  They wanted him so suffer for what he did.  For
what the demon did.  That terrible beast that took over his body and
raised hell on earth.  It was never him that did those God-awful deeds;
it was the demon.

And as he sees the reflections of the deeds, it is his guilt that
thrives inside him.  He suffers for his one mistake...that foolish
mistake that took everything from him.  It killed him and killed his
family and his friends.  He was dead, but yet he sat there; alive and
immortal staring at a mirror, forced to remember the past years.  He
tried to block it out; the visions, the nightmares, the cravings.....

The cravings.  The demon longed for one taste of the warm liquid on itÆs
lips.  He could feel his stomach rumble loudly...begging and pleading
for a feast of blood to quench itÆs dire thirst and soothe the nearly
out of control desire.  But he couldnÆt.  He would never kill again.  He
would never feed off of another human being for as long as he lived,
which could very well be forever.  He pictured the dead animal blood
that he now lived off of.  A shudder rippled through his body.  The
longing for fresh blood was strong, and the old, stale blood made him
nauseous.  But it was all he had.  He thought by now he would be used to
it, especially after so long.

It had been ninety-seven years since his last feed when he killed that
gypsy girl.  He remembered the searing pain--the intense burning feeling
as if his body was on fire when the spell was put on him.  He wished
they had just killed him.  But they wanted him to suffer.  And he
did....more than they knew.

His stomach rumbled louder.  He knew he had to eat.  He tore himself
away from the mirror and he stumbled out of the dirty building into the
dark alley.  The ground was wet and slippery from the rain which now
fell so lightly on his face.  He walked over to the dumpster and dug
through but found nothing he needed.  Nearly fainting from the stench,
he stepped backward and grabbed onto a post for support, coughing
loudly.

A breeze blew through the ally, sending the smell of prey past him.
Searching, his eyes land on a rat that scampered past him.  He felt the
rumble in stomach again.  He knew this was going to be his meal.  He
stepped forward to stalk the small animal but it disappeared behind the
dumpster.  He dove after it, but lost the rat and crashed into trash
cans and bags.

Fuming, he flailed his arms in anger.  He looked up to see a man in
front of him.  ôGod, you are disgusting,ö the man said, looking at his
filthy body.  ôThis is really an unforgettable smell.  This is the
stench of death youÆre giving off here.  And the looks says, uh...Crazy
Homeless Guy.  ItÆs not good.ö

His anger grew intensely.  ôGet away from me,ö he growled.

ôWhat are you gonna do, bite?ö  The man gasped and jumped back.
ôHorrors!  A vampire!ö  He looked at the man in surprise, almost wanting
to laugh at the irony.  ôAh,ö the man continued, ôbut you wouldnÆt bite
me on account of your poor, tortured soul.  ItÆs so sad, a vampire with
a soul.  ItÆs so poignant.ö

He stared at the man, confused and shocked at his words; not
understanding how he could know who he was.  ôWho are you?ö

ôLetÆs take a walk,ö the man said.

This is what Angel had to live for.

              ~*The End*~

Feedback, por favor!

______________________________________________________
Get Your Private, Free Email at http://www.hotmail.com



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: <[e-mail]>
Subject: Discuss: Re: BUFFYFIC: Reflections  (1/1)
Date: 22 Jun 1998 17:42:05 EDT

Very well-written, technically speaking-- but a couple continuity errors. I'm
posting to the list cuz I think they're important for other people to know,
too.

>He stared into the mirror; the aged eyes never leaving, never blinking.

Angel can't see his reflection. At all. In "Out of mind, out of sight", Giles
commented that it must be interesting to be invisible, and then the camera
showed his reflection in the glass of a cabinet (something like that) and
Angel said it wasn't all it was cracked up to be.

>And as he sees the reflections of the deeds, it is his guilt that

Skipped tenses hereabouts, something I've seen less of lately than usual.
Careful about that.

>It had been ninety-seven years since his last feed when he killed that
>gypsy girl.

And here, you might want to clarify that it's his last _human_ feeding. He's
been killin' rats and stuff since then.

Other than those, interesting. Well-written. You might want to go over stuff a
time or two more before you post it, to make sure stuff like the above doesn't
slip thru. :)

Rachel



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Memories At Dawn 1/1
Date: 22 Jun 1998 18:09:20 EDT

Title ~ Memories At Dawn 1/1
Author~ Shani ( [e-mail] )
Time~ After Passion, before Becoming I & II
Rating~ IÆd go with G
AuthorÆs note~ This fic takes place several years in the future.  ItÆs
basically a             Buffy/Angel/Angelus story from BuffyÆs POV.  Comments
of all sorts are more than welcome.  I wrote this after I wrote a similar
story for a Language Arts class, I just changed it to fit w/Buffy.  The
original story was from February, and was changed before Becomng I & II
Disclaimer~ Buffy Summers, Angel/Angelus, Jenny Calendar, and Willow all
belong to Joss Whendon, Mutant Enemy Productions, Kuzui Productions, Sandollar
Productions, and 20th Century Fox.  No infringement intended.  Story for
entertainment purposes only.


            Memories At Dawn

    It was all there, just as she had left it.  A dirty glass stood near the
sink, a small book sitting casually on the table.  She glanced around the
apartment, her gaze finally resting on the stake in the center of the room.
Slowly, without realizing what she was doing, she walked to the stake.
Bending down, she reached for it, hesitating for a moment before picking it
up.
    Her eyes glazed over for a moment, as if she were somewhere far away.  She
closed her eyes.  She still remembered it as if it were yesterday, but it
hadnÆt happened yesterday, it happened years ago.
    She had just turned seventeen.  She had loved him so much.
    She opened her eyes.  Was she ready?  Was she ready to go back to that night?
A soft sigh escaped her lips.  Yes.  It was time, whether she was ready or
not.  Once again, she closed her eyes, ready to return to that night.
    It was her seventeenth birthday.  After narrowly escaping the Judge, they had
returned here.  She had been cold, drenched with rain water.  He offered her
something to change into.  They had let passion consume them.  Neither one
thinking or caring about what could happen. Having no idea the consequences
that they would suffer.  After he had killed Jenny Calendar, he went after
Willow.  It was then that she had to confront him.
    Buffy took a deep breath, calming herself for a moment.  She was sitting in
the same spot he had died.  The same spot that she had destroyed him.
     She had come to kill him.  They had fought violently for at least an hour.
She finally managed to plunge the sharp wooden stake into his chest.  It took
him longer to turn to dust, longer than she thought was usual.  Time seemed to
slow.  Buffy, almost eighteen, watched Angelus die.
    A tear ran down her cheek, followed by another, and another.  She let them
fall.  Through the window, she saw the sun begin to rise.  The brilliant
colors illuminating the sky.  She walked over to the unmade bed and lay down.
She let her eyes close.  A blanket of warmth and peace surrounded her.
    Buffy the Vampire Slayer got up.  She glanced around the apartment.  Her gaze
this time settling on the figure in the doorway.  There Angel stood, bathed in
sunlight.  His arms outstretched and welcoming.  She ran to him.  He folded
her into his arms.  Buffy looked into the apartment.  Her lifeless body lay on
the bed.  Her young face looked at peace for the first time in over three
years.  Together, they disappeared in a flash of brilliant light only they
could see.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The End ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
comments very welcome!!   [e-mail]



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "Sara Barton" <[e-mail]>
Subject: Re: Discuss: Re: BUFFYFIC: Reflections (1/1)
Date: 22 Jun 1998 19:06:07 PDT

Hi!  Thanks for bringing those to my attention.  But one thing I want to
point out is that when I said he stared into the mirror, I wasn't
implying that he had a reflection.  As you read on, it said that he
searched for a glimpse of what he used to be, which meant that he would
stare into it hoping he would see himself.

----Original Message Follows----

Very well-written, technically speaking-- but a couple continuity
errors. I'm
posting to the list cuz I think they're important for other people to
know,
too.

>He stared into the mirror; the aged eyes never leaving, never blinking.

Angel can't see his reflection. At all. In "Out of mind, out of sight",
Giles
commented that it must be interesting to be invisible, and then the
camera
showed his reflection in the glass of a cabinet (something like that)
and
Angel said it wasn't all it was cracked up to be.

>And as he sees the reflections of the deeds, it is his guilt that

Skipped tenses hereabouts, something I've seen less of lately than
usual.
Careful about that.

>It had been ninety-seven years since his last feed when he killed that
>gypsy girl.

And here, you might want to clarify that it's his last _human_ feeding.
He's
been killin' rats and stuff since then.

Other than those, interesting. Well-written. You might want to go over
stuff a
time or two more before you post it, to make sure stuff like the above
doesn't
slip thru. :)

Rachel



______________________________________________________
Get Your Private, Free Email at http://www.hotmail.com



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: "A Miscommunication" (1/1)
Date: 24 Jun 1998 00:41:04 EDT

Notes: Inspired by "Wanted" by the Cranberries, as well as by seeing Jenny on
Buffy for the last couple weeks. This story takes place between Angel getting
his soul back and "Passion", probably closer to the beginning of the
estrangement between Jenny and the gang than to the other end of the timeline.
Disclaimer: All disclaimers apply.
Distribution: Not without my express permission, please.
Feedback: Yes! Good, bad, and mixed, cuz I can't improve less I know what I'm
doing right wrong and backward! To [e-mail], please.

~

                      "A Miscommunication"

                  //Too many misunderstandings
                       Causing such delay
                And if it doesn't work like this,
                   Well I'll try another way.
              Oh, if this is the way you wanted it,
                   Oh, I didn't understand.//
                   -"Wanted", The Cranberries

     "Rupert, it's me. Jenny. I know you're angry with me, and it's
perfectly justified, and I-- I just want to talk. I care about you
and I want to make sure everything's okay, even though I know it's
not okay between us, and--"
     With a sigh, Jenny Calendar shook her head and felt her
shoulders slump as she leaned forward, resting her head in her
hands and curling up a bit more in her armchair. She pushed her
fingers through her hair and asked herself, why was she doing this?
Why bother? He would never listen to her, he would never understand
that despite everything, she hadn't meant to hurt them.
     "I'm such an idiot," she whispered, looking up through her
fingers at the phone she had set in front of her almost two hours
before.
     This wasn't working. She must have tried two hundred different
ways of saying she was sorry, and she still hadn't actually picked
up the telephone and called him yet.
     Well, she thought to herself, there was one way to remedy at
least the last part of the problem. Clearly, all the planning in
the world wasn't going to do her any good, here. So she reached
forward instead, picking up the telephone and dialing the numbers
she had memorized so long ago on those nights when she'd had
nothing better to do than sit at home with the staff list of
Sunnydale High and imagine what kind of nerve it would take to
actually ask the school's librarian out on a date.
     The phone rang twice, then the answering machine came on. For
a moment, Jenny was surprised. She hadn't thought someone like
Rupert would have an answering machine-- not the way he behaved
toward technology. She felt a faint smile cross her lips, and
immediately felt it melt away when she realized this meant she was
going to have to leave a message. Because she couldn't very well
not say anything, could she?
     Rupert's voice came on, telling her she had reached 555-7825,
and to please leave a message after the beep. But as she opened her
mouth, Jenny realized her throat had gone dry. She was shaking like
one of the girls she taught every day did when they were about to
talk to whatever football player it was who was the current "dopest
guy in school". She shook her head, telling herself to calm down.
It was just Rupert. Just the most amazing, sensitive, caring,
knowledgeable man she had ever met in her entire life. Just the
most wonderful man in the world, and she had only ripped his heart
out when she had betrayed him.
     It was a hard fight, but finally she managed to say the words,
"I'm sorry." That was all she could get out before her fingers
rebelled against her mind and turned the phone off, putting it back
down.
     She stared at the phone in horror as she realized what she had
just done. She knew full well there was no way she could dial him
back, but what she'd done was almost worse than not saying anything
at all.
     "Great," she whispered to herself. "Just _great_." She
swallowed, feeling tears rise to her eyes, hating herself for being
such an idiot. She couldn't have been a little more specific? She
couldn't have said, "Hi, it's Jenny, I'm sorry I'm a horrible
person"? He would walk in to check his messages, and if he even
recognized her _voice_-- which he might not, given that he had
refused to speak to her in close to three weeks, even at faculty
meetings-- he would think she had completely lost her mind.
     Shaking her head, giving her phone a rueful glance, Jenny
wondered how the hell she would ever explain herself to him. If he
ever asked. Which, she realized with a sigh, he might not.
     As she stood and made her way upstairs to take a bath and try
to calm herself down, Jenny wondered why she had even bothered to
try. Words didn't mean anything with a man like Rupert. He looked
at actions. And she had pretty well royally screwed _that_ up when
she'd opted to give her loyalty to her family and her people as
opposed to the man she loved and the girl he was sworn to protect.
Because of her, Rupert hadn't been able to do his job to the best
of his ability. And that, Jenny knew, wasn't something he was
likely to soon forgive.
                                *
     "Giles said it was in his living room," Willow said as Buffy
pocketed the key the Watcher had given them.
     "You look around in here, 'cause knowing Giles he probably
lives in his study," Buffy said with a slight grin.
     Willow nodded, and the Slayer moved off into the room where
Giles kept the books and such that he _didn't_ keep at school. As
she walked into the room, she heard something beeping. Immediately,
she moved toward the source of the noise. Giles' answering machine-
- the one she and Willow had bought him at Christmas.
     So long as she was here, Buffy decided, she might as well get
the message for him. She pulled a pad of paper off the far side of
the desk and then pulled the drawer of the desk out, poising it
over the paper and hitting the "play" button.
     First, there was the automated voice: "You have. One.
Message."
     Then came Giles' voice. "You have reached 555-7825. Please
leave a message after the tone."
     Next, the short beep.
     Then, Buffy's brow furrowed as she heard the voice that came
on.
     "I'm sorry."
     Then a click and another beep, telling her the message was
over.
     "What the..." She hit the key again, listening as the message
replayed. It was a woman's voice, she thought, and it sounded as
though it's owner had been crying, but...
     "Is that Ms. Calendar?" came Willow's voice from the doorway.
     Buffy turned and saw her friend standing in the doorway,
holding the book they had been sent to pick up. "That's the book?"
     Willow nodded, moving over and hitting the "play" key again.
"Yeah," she said, then she listened to the message. "Why'd Ms.
Calendar call him?"
     Buffy shook her head, feeling her heart going hard inside her
chest. "I don't know," she said, her voice cold. "I'll tell him
when we get back, though," she said, knowing full well she would do
no such thing. Keep that lying bitch away from everything around
her, that was the best way to keep from getting hurt again. The
idea that the computer teacher would have anything to offer either
of them was something Buffy didn't feel like acknowledging in any
way, shape, or form. And as far as Ms. Calendar and her
relationship with Giles, better that it stayed dead. Better if
Buffy could keep Giles from getting hurt again. Better for
everybody involved. So, she decided, she would lie.
     "Okay," Willow said, and Buffy wondered for a moment how it
was the other girl could be so trusting sometimes.
     *Easy,* a voice in her mind cautioned. *She hasn't had her
entire world ripped away from her.* Ignoring the voice, and
offering Willow a brief smile, Buffy set the notepad down without
having written anything on it at all, and the two quickly left
Giles' apartment, headed back toward the school.
                                *
     Morning came, and Jenny found herself walking into her
classroom five minutes early for the bell, as always. Waiting for
her first period class, she tried to put the memory of her phone
call out of her mind-- it had bothered her all night long.
     She heard one of the kids walk in, but paid it no attention.
Truthfully, she had the feeling today was going to be one of those
days when she didn't feel like doing much of anything except
working. At least, not until she saw Rupert and knew how he was
going to react to her message.
     "Will," came a voice from the door. Jenny glanced up,
immediately recognizing the voice as being Buffy's. Maybe she'd see
some sort of sign as to how Rupert had taken her apology reflected
in the girl's face, she thought, a spark of hope igniting in her
chest.
     No suck luck, though, she realized. Buffy was still refusing
to look at her as Willow stood from her computer and walked to the
doorway, offering Jenny a slight smile as she passed by.
     Jenny returned the smile, but Willow had already turned and
walked out of the room. Sighing, Jenny wondered if this was what it
was like to be without a friend in the world. Sure, there were the
teachers she hung out with, and there were a few friends on-line,
but she had enjoyed the luxury of hanging around with Rupert and
the other kids. Having people around who understood the mystical
side of things. And of course, dating Rupert had gotten her more
teasing than anything else from the other teachers, because most of
them regarded him as something of a cold fish, and none were
particularly eager to spend time with him. Which had been fine as
far as her relationship with him had been concerned, because it
meant they weren't constantly fending off invitations for dinners
and such, but now that their contact had come to something of an
end, Jenny was beginning to realize the degree to which she had
been ignoring her other friends.
     A few minutes later, Willow walked back in, biting her lip.
Seeing the look on the girl's face, Jenny felt a tinge of concern.
"Something wrong?" she asked, the words slipping out before she
remembered that Willow, though she at least was still civil, had
also become a little cooler since Angel had lost his soul.
     "Um, no, not-- no," Willow said, offering a weak smile for
about half a second before she sighed. "Well, actually, um..."
     Jenny stood, walking around her desk, and leaning against the
front of the wooden construction. "What's up?" she asked, giving
her best approximation of a warm smile.
     "It's, well," Willow swallowed. "Buffy-- she says that, um,
Giles, he--"
     Jenny felt her heart sinking, knowing suddenly what it was
that Willow was going to say.
     The fact that she was now fighting the urge to let herself
cry, two minutes before class was going to start, must have shown
through, because Willow immediately continued. "He just needs some
time," she insisted, "and I mean, I'm sure it will be okay, because
you know, it's not like we're all mad at you, it's mostly just
Buffy, because of Angel, and--"
     "Willow," Jenny said quietly, shaking her head and taking a
quick breath, forcing herself to steady out. "It's okay."
     "Are you, you know, sure?"
     Looking up, Jenny took in Willow's expression-- concerned and
caring. And she managed a small smile. "Yeah," she said. "I'm
sure." She sighed. "And class is about to start," she said, "so you
should probably sit down..."
     "There's nobody else here, though," Willow said, looking
around the room. "But," she said quickly, "I bet they'll come in a
minute or so. So, um, I'll, you know, sit down, but if you want to,
um, talk later, you know, I'm free and even if Buffy's mad at you
I don't think I am, which doesn't mean I'm a disloyal friend or
anything, it just means I know that sometimes there are things you
have to do whether you want to or not, and I know you wouldn't have
hurt anybody if you had known it was going to happen, because
you've been a really nice teacher so far, and--"
     The smile on her lips growing slightly, Jenny held up a hand.
"Understood," she said, interrupting gently as Willow offered a
smile and sat down. "And Willow?" she continued, ignoring the pain
that was eating a hole in her heart in favor of the warmth that had
begun to grow when she had heard the girl's words.
     "Yes?" Willow asked, looking up.
     "Thanks," Jenny said quietly as another student walked into
the room and moved to his computer.
     Willow grinned. "No problem," she replied.
     Retaking her seat and hitting the key to boot up her computer,
Jenny knew Willow was right. Or at least, she hoped so. Because if
all it would take for Rupert to forgive her was time, then she
could wait-- because she had all the time in the world, and if it
meant he would let her back into his life, she would wait for as
long as it took.
     After all, she thought, it wasn't as though either of them
were going anywhere.

THE END

Copyright 1998
Rachel Brody

Comments to [e-mail], please.



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "Mark Jones" <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Diaries (3) - Cordelia
Date: 24 Jun 1998 21:34:34 +0100

Here's another diary... enjoy.
Nothing has happened, no-one knows about Xander and Cordelia, I guess that's
all you need to know.
Summary:  A quick look in Cordys diary...
Disclaimer:  They aren't mine.
Feedback:  This is VERY important to me, it will help me with the rest of
the series... please?  Send it, good or bad to
[e-mail]

CORDELIA'S  DIARY
*************************

Dear Diary,
ItÆs Cordelia here.
What is going on with Xander, heÆs great and all, but can I really tell
people that IÆm with him, what would that be like, how would I cope?  But I
guess love rules all.  IÆll just see where life takes us, people will have
to understand, or I guess itÆs true that they arenÆt real friends.
The only thing that annoys me about Xand is the way he is so devoted to
Buffy; but then again I guess I can see why, sheÆs great; she slays and all
and isnÆt afraid to go after anything, I mean sheÆs with a vamp and all.
Willow is a bit annoying, but if the truth be known, I wish I could be more
like her, sheÆs so clever and has her head screwed on, she doesnÆt let what
people think stop her from doing anything, like Buffy.
If I could just be more like them, but then I wouldnÆt be Cordelia, IÆd be
one of them.
What am I going to do????  Life would be easier if people didnÆt care so
much about what other people do.
IÆll be fine, IÆll go to school tomorrow and be Cory again, I wonÆt think
about all this stuff.  If the truth be known, I enjoy being popular and
having Xander run around after me, even though that isnÆt at all fair and it
is a bit selfish of me, but thatÆs the me everyone knows, why should I have
to change?
Goodnight,
Cordelia.
***********
Feedback:  [e-mail] - you all have an opinion, so
please do send it!




-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "Andrea Newbery" <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Repercussions 12/16
Date: 24 Jun 1998 16:03:06 PDT

Title: Repercussions 12/16
Author: Andrea
E-mail: [e-mail]
disclaimers: These characters are the property of Joss Whedon, Mutant
Enemy, the WB, etc... They are not mine.
feedback: please. Good, bad, whatever
thanks: To Rachel, Christine and Jenn


Sunnydale Graveyard
August 21, 1998
8:00 p.m.


The world spinning, Buffy walked aimlessly, desperately trying to hold
everything together. Wandering around town, the tears falling unnoticed,
mixing with the rain on her face. Since leaving Xander her thoughts were
incoherent, the wound that the confrontation had opened consuming her.
She held Angel's coat tightly around her, the feel of the leather
against her arms the only reality she understood.

Her rage at Xander helped to soothe the pain, the anger and hatred
blocking out the hurt. Pushing her wet hair off of her face she thought
of a thousand ways to hurt Xander, to make him feel the anguish and the
pain that she felt. The feelings were pure, undiluted by the friendship
they had once shared. Xander was a stranger to her, as much as she was a
stranger to herself. 'Betrayer!' ran through her head, an accusation,
pointed at Xander and at herself.

She shivered, feeling a chill in the damp air. Slowing down she took in
her surroundings for the first time in hours and realized she was at the
graveyard.  Squaring her shoulders she let the rage she felt carry her
forward, she could handle the memories buried there. She moved slowly
through the graveyard, the picture in her mind of Cordelia and Xander
with their arms around each other fed her rage, 'what right did he have
to be happy after he sentenced both me and Angel to Hell?' The pain of
the knowledge that Angel would never wrap his arms around her again,
never look at her the way Cordelia looked at Xander, rocketed through
her.

Stifling the sob that tried to escape, she became aware that the sun was
setting and realized the vampires would be out soon. Sitting down beside
a gravestone, she put her head in her lap and waited, thinking now was a
perfect time to begin protecting Sunnydale again.  She wasn't sure how
long she sat before slowly becoming aware that she was no longer alone.
She tensed, feeling someone come up behind her. At the soft growl she
turned quickly, her arms pushing away the vampire who thought he was
getting an easy dinner.  She jumped to her feet, almost giddy to have an
outlet for her rage and pain. She barely gave the vampire time to get
close to her before she was spinning and kicking, her eyes roaming
constantly for something to use as a stake.  She forced him backwards,
knocking him to the ground, then waited for him to get up and run at her
again. She was enjoying using her strength against him and not willing
to end the battle.  She put all her anger at what happened to Angel in
her punches, her anger at Xander into her kicks, releasing it all onto
the vampire. She didn't realize she was crying, didn't realize that
Angel's name was on her lips, she knew nothing but this vampire. Slowly
she realized he wasn't rising to fight her any  more, he just lay on the
ground, unable to move.

She walked over to a tree, pulling a branch free and walked back to the
vampire lying on the ground. She pointed the branch at him, giving him a
chance to get up and fight for his existence. He struggled to his feet
and growled as he threw himself at her. She stepped back, letting him
throw himself onto the branch and disappear into a pile of dust. Looking
down at the fine layer of it that stuck to the wet leather of Angel's
jacket she began to cry. Brushing frantically at the dust, remembering
when he gave it to her, the tears flowing in rivers down her face. She
collapsed onto the ground, kneeling in the mud, the devastation she felt
at losing Angel was all she knew. The memories came in still shots
through her mind, the first time she ever saw him in the graveyard, the
kisses they had shared, the words they had spoken to each other. She
sobbed, clutching Angel's coat, her mind trying to absorb the loss.
Unable to stop the flow of tears she cried until she had no tears left.
Letting her pain at what she had done go and finally mourning her loss.


 Climbing slowly to her feet, she realized the makeshift stake was still
in her hand. Dropping it she stood there, the tears no longer falling.
Straightening her shoulders she began walking, continuing through the
cemetery, feeling her mind clear for the first time since Angel had
left. The still shots of her life continued to flash through her head,
memories of all the other nights spent in the graveyard, memories that
included Xander no matter how hard she tried to block them.  Remembering
him saving her from Angel when she had been so sick, and helping her
patrol after Angel had changed. She couldn't forget everything he had
done for her before. Smiling bitterly she realized she would have to say
something else to Xander eventually, he was not responsible for what
happened to Angel, that was her fault, her responsibility.  She couldn't
picture ever forgiving Xander, trusting him again, but he had been a
good friend to her once, and he never would have betrayed her if she had
done her duty when Angel had first changed. If only she had been able
to, then the demon would be the only one in Hell, not her Angel, not his
soul. She smiled painfully, feeling the familiar guilt settling inside
her, finally getting comfortable with its presence.



______________________________________________________
Get Your Private, Free Email at http://www.hotmail.com



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: "The Graveyard Shift At 92,4 FM" (1/2)
Date: 25 Jun 1998 01:31:54 EDT

Notes: Thanx to my co-author on this one, without whom it woulda been a much
shorter-- and much less awesome-- story. Love ya, Sare! :) This one takes
place a bit after "Becoming II".
Disclaimers: Songs belong to whoever owns them. Same goes for Buffy
characters. Rick would be mine, Trish would be Sarah's.
Feedback: Yea, please! To [e-mail], please. :)
Distribution: Not without my permission, thanks.

~

                "The Graveyard Shift At 92.4 FM"

     "Hello, you've reached 92.4 FM, Sunnydale's only home of fun
tunes in the sun, and you're speaking to Rick the Slickest DJ In
Town, can I help you?"
     The kid on the other end-- because it was always kids who
called during the request hours-- seemed to hesitate a moment. Then
he spoke. "Yeah," he said, his voice shaking a little. "C'you put
out Third Eye Blind's 'Jumper', to Buffy from Xander? And let her
know I never meant to say what I did. And she should come back."
     Rick nodded, already hitting the keys that would bring the
disc up. "Sure thing, pal," he said, but the line was already dead.
He shrugged, setting the disc program to play "Jumper" as the Goo
Goo Dolls' "Iris" finished up. Then he swiveled over to the
microphone as the CD player gave him a short countdown.
     "And that was 'Iris' from the Goo Goos, the amazing song off
the 'City of Angels' soundtrack. Next, we have a song going out
from Xander to Buffy-- Third Eye Blind's 'Jumper'. Buffy, Xander
never meant to say what he said, and he's sorry."
     As the song geared up, Rick flipped off his mike and tapped
his fingers on the table in front of him, wondering what it was
that made people call a call-in show like this when they couldn't
even be sure the person they wanted to get their message would even
hear the song. But hey, he supposed it was any chance for hope,
given some of the messes these kids got themselves into.
     A few hours and several requests later-- the graveyard shift
was always rather slow-- the phone line lit up again, and Rick
sighed, leaning forward and picking up the phone. "Hey there, this
is Rick the Slick for SunTunes 92.4, where you can forget your
troubles and sink into the music, can I help you?"
     "Yeah," a quiet, female voice came. "Do you, um, think you
could, well, play that song, I don't know who did it, but, I think
the title is 'Count on Me'..."
     "By Cece Winan and Whitney Houston?" There was no reply from
the other end, so Rick just nodded. "Yeah, sure," he said. "Who's
that going out to?"
     "Um, a friend of mine. Who's kind of in, well, some trouble.
I think. But she might not be, she might be--"
     "Whoa, hold up there, little lady," Rick said, letting the
hint of a smile creep into his tone. "I just need a name."
     "Buffy. From Willow." And the line went dead.
     Rick raised an eyebrow, his fingers tapping out the codes for
the CD while he searched his mind to place why the name felt so
familiar. Then it snapped into place-- that kid earlier, the one
for Third Eye Blind-- had requested the same one.
     *Weird,* he thought. But as "I Go To Extremes" came to a
close, he let the CD fire up Willow's request. "This next one is
from Willow to Buffy, it's Cece Winan and Whitney Houston singing,
'Count on Me'."
     With a yawn and a glance at the clock-- it was just past two
in the morning-- Rick let himself lean back and relax, listening to
the music.
     It was almost time for him to leave when the next request came
in. Standing from where he'd been lying on the floor while Dave
Matthews' Band played, Rick walked over and picked up the receiver.
"Hey, it's 92.4 FM and you're talking to the Slickest DJ in town,
this is the request show, you got one?"
     The pause that preceded this caller's voice seemed to last a
little longer than most of those that came in, and that immediately
put Rick slightly on edge. "Yeah," came a gruff, male voice.
"I...I've never actually called one of these things before. How's
this work, exactly?"
     Rick grinned a little. Newbies, joy. "You call, you tell me a
song. You tell me who it's going to and who it's from. You tell me
why. I relay that information to the listeners and play the song.
Easy enough?"
     "Seems like," the man on the other end said. "Alright, then.
'You Learn', by that Alanis chick. From Angel to the Slayer." He
paused a moment. "Tell her I'm...okay. I got out. Tell her
everybody gets hurt, and everybody learns from the experience. I
don't blame her for anything that happened because she didn't have
anything to do with it. Fate's a powerful force. She did the best
thing, for everybody. She knows where to find me." He paused a
moment, then spoke again. "Tell her I still love her."
     *_Fucking_ weird...* Rick thought to himself, though he had to
admit that this caller was at least slightly more talkative than
the others he'd had that night. "Gotcha, buddy," he said.
     "Thanks," said the caller named Angel, and just as Rick was
turning to program the next song, the phone lit up again.
     "Hey there, this is 94.2--"
     "It's Buffy."
     Rick swallowed, his eyes widening as he broke off the standard
spiel and nodded. This time, there was no difficulty in remembering
the name from earlier in the evening, and in fact he was already
starting to put together a mental image of what this chick must
look like. "Yeah," he said, his throat dry, "can I help you?"
     "'Torn'," she said, "Natalie Imbruglia's 'Torn'. For everybody
I've hurt. That's all."
     And the line went dead.
     Rick stared at the phone in his hand for a moment before he
made his decision. Time for one more song. Either he played that
Angel guy's song, and those two kids from earlier might not hear
from their friend for a long time-- or he played hers and let Angel
down. It wasn't much of a decision, really.
     "This is the last song of the night, for everybody she's hurt,
from Buffy." He shook his head, sighing slightly. "And this is from
me...Buffy, it can't be as bad as you think."
     With that, he hit the key and let the music play.

           //I'm all out of faith, this is how I feel
       I'm cold and I am chained, lying naked on the floor
           Illusion never changed into something real
        Wide awake and I can see the perfect sky is torn
            You're a little late, I'm already torn.//

                               ~~~
It might have ended there...but it might have ended differently.
                               ~~~

                  ::shimmery "what if" music::

     ..."It's Buffy."
     Rick swallowed, his eyes widening as he broke off the standard
spiel and nodded. This time, there was no difficulty in remembering
the name from earlier in the evening, and in fact he was already
starting to put together a mental image of what this chick must
look like. "Yeah," he said, his throat dry, "can I help you?"
     "'Torn'," she said, "Natalie Imbruglia's 'Torn'. For everybody
I've hurt. That's all."
     And the line went dead.
     *God. What to do.* His first inclination was just to
completely bump that guy Angel's bit altogether. After all, there
was only time for one more song. And Buffy, who ever she was,
certainly deserved it.
     *But that guy, man. He sounded like he went through some kinda
hellish wringer. I think the Slayer, whoever she is, deserves to at
least know the score. Cause, if he could _talk_ to her, he wouldn't
have called me...* And wasn't that the point of being a request-
line DJ? To hook people up, help them communicate?
     "Alright, all you night-owls out there. Our last song of the
night is coming up, but I got a little spiel I gotta spin first.
Angel, buddy, I'm sorry, but your request got bumped. But just
cause it's your first time requesting, I'll give you this much.
Slayer, where ever you are, Angel's back, and he loves you. He
knows it isn't your fault, and he mentioned fate somewhere in his
message to me. There was more, but it was a tad on the lengthy side
and hey, its 4 am, so you know where to find him-- go get your
message."
     He grinned when that was done. Now on to the good stuff. Well,
he reflected, technically it wasn't good, but so far as the idea of
sealing up something that had been going on all night went, this
was a good thing.
     "And now, to our last request of the night, Willow, Xander,
listen up. This one's from Buffy. To all the one's she's hurt. This
is Natalie Imbruglia's Torn. And this is Rick, the slickest DJ in
Sunnydale, signing off."
     With that, he cued up the music and made way for the intern's
two hour stint before the morning show.

               ::shimmery "what if" music fades::

                                  ~~~~
             Or, it might have happened a different way...
                                  ~~~~

Comments to [e-mail], please.




-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: "The Graveyard Shift at 94.2 FM" (2/2)
Date: 25 Jun 1998 01:32:05 EDT

See part one for disclaimers and notes. Comments to [e-mail],
please.

~

       But, then again, it might have happened like this:
                               ~~~

     ..."It's Buffy."
     Rick swallowed, his eyes widening as he broke off the standard
spiel and nodded. This time, there was no difficulty in remembering
the name from earlier in the evening, and in fact he was already
starting to put together a mental image of what this chick must
look like. "Yeah," he said, his throat dry, "can I help you?"
     "'Torn'," she said, "Natalie Imbruglia's 'Torn'. For everybody
I've hurt. That's all."
     And the line went dead.
     *Ah, what to do, what to do. Well, Angel got his request in
first, and I hate to let down the newbies, but this is the infamous
Buffy here. I mean, she sounds like she's in trouble. Her and her
friends sound like they really need this. And her message. Damn.
Makes it sound like whatever happened was seriously traumatic. And
what kind of a nickname is 'Slayer' anyway?* He shook his head.
"Torn" it was.
     "Alright all you night-owls out there! Yes, that's right, it's
the last song of the night. You made it this far, you deserve it.
This last request is a special one, it goes out to-- well, I'm
guessing it goes out to quite a few people. But Xander and Willow?
You two cats better be paying attention, 'cause this one's from
Buffy. Dedicated to all the people she's hurt, this is Natalie
Imbruglia's Torn. And this is Rick, the slickest DJ in Sunnydale,
signing off and saying be careful out there, cause some people in
this town actually _respond_ to the nickname 'Slayer'."
     He laughed softly at his own little joke as the music began to
play, and picked up his coffee mug with one hand, taking off the
headphones with the other. "Have a ball, Trish."
     The intern, who had taken up her post waiting by the door,
quickly swallowed the mouthful of Jolt and grabbed the phones.
"Will do. You leaving?"
     "Nah. I have a little paperwork, then I'll book."
     "Kay. Later."
     Rick walked out of the studio, and down the hall to the office
he shared with the afternoon guy. He sat down kicking back in his
chair, not fully wanting to start on the small accumulation of
papers just yet.
     He sighed. God, why did he feel this horrible? He looked out
of the office door, to the print on the wall. Slickest DJ In Town,
that was him. He shook his head and spoke to the publicity shot of
himself and the morning crew, then tried to explain it the picture.
"I mean, I do this all the time. You get two calls, you can only
play one song. What the hell is my problem?"
     He shook his head. God. Why the hell did Angel, whoever he
was, have to mention _fate_?!? Hadn't he been damn serious enough?
     "But it's not like this is the end of the world. Or even the
deciding factor in two people's lives. So why do I still feel like
I just played God?"  He sighed heavily once more and drained his
coffee cup. "Time to go bother the intern."  He grabbed a multi-
colored koosh from his desk and walked back into the hall.
     "Good morning, Sunnydale!  This is Trish the-- Aaah!  Sorry
bout that folks. Rick just hit me with a koosh. What do you-- ugh.
Well guys, it seems that six hours just isn't enough for Ricky
here. He's _still_ got somethin' t'say."
     "Well folks," Rick said, speaking directly into the mike,
"here's the thing. There's one last request I just gotta handle.
It's up to Trish whether she actually wants to play the song, but
the dedication is one to hear. And Angel, you owe me one for this."
He took a breath. "Slayer, if you're out there, Angel is back, and
he loves you, and he wants you to know that he's okay, the
situation is okay, and yea, whatever happened happened, but he
knows you did what you had to. And, for the life of me, I don't
remember the rest of the message--"
     "Of course he doesn't."
     "--hey, it's four in the morning, and it was a long message.
Give me a break here. Anyway, Slayer. If you want the rest of the
message, you know where to find him. And trust me kiddo, from the
tone of his voice, he wants you to find him. Well that's all."
     "Yea. Except for the song."
     "The song Angel requested for his Slayer was 'that Alanis
chick's' 'You Learn'. Hit it, Trish."

                              ~~~~~
         The thing is, it happened none of these ways.
             Here's the real way things turned out:
                              ~~~~~

     "Alright, then," said the guy on the line. "'You Learn', by
that Alanis chick. From Angel to the Slayer." He paused a moment.
"Tell her I'm...okay. I got out. Tell her everybody gets hurt, and
everybody learns from the experience. I don't blame her for
anything that happened because she didn't have anything to do with
it. Fate's a powerful force. She did the best thing, for everybody.
She knows where to find me." He paused a moment, then spoke again.
"Tell her I still love her."
     Rick was completely blown away. He thought this Buffy chick
had problems. Wow. But _Angel_ and the _Slayer_?  Come on. He
wondered what their real names were. "Hey, no problem. Just one
thing though. I gotta have your real names. Sorry, it's policy."
     The silence on the other end of the phone was creepy, to say
the least, and made him think that perhaps the caller had hung up
already.
     Then suddenly, a response. "My name _is_ Angel."
     "Uh huh. And I suppose hers is The Slayer?"
     "No," Angel snapped quickly. "Her name is Buffy. Is that good
enough for you? Do you need a zip code?"
     "No," Rick said, suddenly quite subdued. "No, that's just
fine. I'll-- I'll get right on it."
     As he punched the line dead, he marveled at the situation that
this poor girl must be in. He was just about to cue up the next
song when the line lit up again. He answered it automatically,
without really realizing that the request line was over.
     "Hey there," he started, without his characteristic zest,
"this is-- "  But he was interrupted before he could finish.
     "It's Buffy."
     He started at the name, the very one he'd been contemplating.
"Are you okay?"
     "Torn."
     "'Scuse me?"
     "Natalie Imbruglia's 'Torn'. Play it." Her words were clipped,
and her voice harsh, as if she had been crying.
     "Um, who's it for, and what's the message?"  He was afraid to
know.
     "To _everyone_. For all the pain I've caused, and for
everything I did wrong."
     The whine of the dead line sounded in his ears, harshly
drowning out the fifteen second dead air warning.
     *Oh boy.* Now what?  Which request to play... Well, Buffy
seemed to be the woman of the hour, and most requested to boot.
*Okay,* he thought, keying up the song. *'Torn' it is.*
     He waited until Fastball and "The Way" came to a close, using
the time to regain his composure.
     "Okay... Well, you waited for it Sunnydale, and here it is.
This is the final song of the night, requested by, you got it, the
most called after woman in town. This one goes out to _everyone_...
from Buffy. It's for all the pain, and everything done wrong." He
paused for a moment, then cleared his throat. "And...I just gotta
tell you, Buffy, there are a lot of people out there tonight
thinkin' about you." He let enough time pass for the words to sink
in on whoever might be listening, then spoke again. "This is Rick
the Slick, signing off with the lovely Trisha to take over. The
song of the night? Natalie Imbruglia's 'Torn'."
     He picked up his coffee, making way for the intern's two hour
stint before the morning show.
     "Have a good one, Trish."
     "Yea, you too."
     He paused on his way out of the door to listen to the lyrics,
wondering just how well they fit the poor girl's situation.

           //I'm all out of faith, this is how I feel
       I'm cold and I am chained, lying naked on the floor
           Illusion never changed into something real
        Wide awake and I can see the perfect sky is torn
            You're a little late, I'm already torn.//

     As the words began to sink in, Rick felt a chill travel up his
spine. He had heard of those who were really down and out calling
up radio shows and such, then doing something drastic afterwards.
Everyone in this business had a friend who it had happened to. But
no one ever had it actually happen to them. Suicide was the worst
case scenario, but it was also the most notable. And from
everything he'd ever heard of, with some of these people, all they
really needed to hear was that they were loved.
     *Omigod. Angel.*
     He'd completely forgotten. He would have told her when he had
her on the phone, but he'd _completely_ forgotten. That guy, while
he'd been creepy and intense, had said he loved her. And that was
something Buffy needed to know.
     He motioned to Trish from across the room, ignoring the nasty
looks she was shooting his way. He took the headphones up from her,
and cued up a song.
     "Had you all fooled, didn't I?  Well, we do have one last
request. And one really long message. Buffy? You'd better be
listening, girl. 'Cause Angel's back from wherever he was, he loves
you, and he understands that you had to do...whatever it was that
you did. He mentioned fate, though that doesn't make a hell of a
lotta sense on this end.
     "So. Buff. Go find your honey. 'Cause, girl, love is love. Go
out there and grab it with both hands, cause it may be the _only_
happiness you have. Buffy, this one is from Angel."
     He pressed the button and heard the opening strains of Angel's
request flood through the headphones.
     From where she sat, Trisha shot him a dirty look and pulled
off her headphones. "You really leaving this time?"
     "Yea," he said, knowing that like Xander and Willow, whoever
they were, he'd done something to try and help the phenomena known
as Buffy. Even if he never knew how things turned out, he knew he
had done what he could. "I'm gone."
     Now it was up to Angel, Rick thought as he left the room, and
may God's grace go with him on whatever journey he had set out for
himself in getting back to the woman he loved.

THE END

Copyright 1998
Rachel Brody & Sarah Liz Gordy

Comments to [e-mail], please.



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Argh, correction on the last thing I posted...
Date: 25 Jun 1998 01:47:33 EDT

This is what I get for trying to post at one thirty in the morning, eh? The
title of the story, which I screwed up TWICE, is:

"The Graveyard Shift At 92.4 FM"

Thank you.

::bows and exits stage left::

R



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: _-Sun-_ <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Charlotte Sometimes (part 38)
Date: 25 Jun 1998 00:30:00 -0700

I'm sorry it's so short and that I skipped a lot, but it just wasn't
enough fun to write Dru's big get away scene ;)


Charlotte Sometimes (part 38)

    Drusilla stumbled through the woods. The pain that was coursing through
her body made her vision fade. The pain that started at her ankles, and
wound around her body, to her beaten and scratched legs, to her broken
ribs - or at least she assumed.
But the sight she was before her, as she blink a couple times to clear
her thought, and be sure of what she may be seeing - the large thick
road ahead of her.
Drusilla began to laugh.
Seeing the road to her house, seeing her path out of dissertation. She
knew where she was. After endless pain and walking, she knew. Less than
5 miles from her house now! The large cross was hanging high in the air.
Less than 2 miles from the church!    She couldn't stop the tears from
falling, or the unbearable pain that caused them, but she could see
hope.

    Drusilla's dress scattered behind her, barely clinging to her dirty
skin as she ran to the road.
    And though she immediately fell onto her swollen ankle, a hideous black
color. She got right back up, limping and jogging, things were looking
up! She was safe in the sun, and she was almost home!


*

    The priest dropped his papers as he hurried ahead to the visitor at the
large doors.

    It was Drusilla who stood outside, leaning against the wooden doors,
barely keeping herself stable, trying futily to cleanse her face with
dirty fingers, but unable to concentrate on looking her best.
    Tears rolled from her eyes as he large wooden door gave way, and she
fell into the arms of priest.
    He gasped at the sight before him, as Drusilla feinted in his strong
arms.
The man picked up her legs, carrying her away from the door.
    "Sisters!" He screamed and was immediately surrounded by four to five
nuns...



--
_-SuN-_

SD - Http://home.earthlink.net/~kbleyle/SD/index.html
K  - http://home.earthlink.net/~kbleyle/kinky/

    Daylight licked me into shape, I must have been asleep for
days. And moving lips to breathe her name, I opened up my eyes
And found myself alone alone. Alone above a raging sea
That stole the only girl I loved, And drowned her deep inside
of me (The Cure)

_ - _Spikette _ Dru's Dolly - Mercenary_ - _
  _ - _ Head Dominatrix in the Evil _ - _
_ - _   Plan For World Domination, _ - _
  _ - _ With Chains and Stuff _ - _



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: _-Sun-_ <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Charlotte Sometimes (part 38 too)
Date: 25 Jun 1998 00:38:02 -0700

oh wow! I forgot a part.. heh.. I'm sorry again!

Charlotte Sometimes (part 38 too)

    She had awoken in darkness, which of course had immediately frightened
her. Screaming she'd ripped at the thick covers the engulfed her body.
    When she was surrounded by nuns, coming from all sides she'd felt
claustrophobic and hissed at them. Yelling and screaming.
When one came eventually close enough to the hysterical child she ripped
off the cross around the sisters neck, giving the lady quiet a fright -
but it had calmed down Drusilla, praying and thanking the lord for
saving her.

    It took less then an hour of crying and begging, but now, finally she
was on the road back to her house in a large black carriage.
    Giving the wooden cross a death grip she prayed that Lydia would be
safe.....

To be continued VERY soon

*

--
_-SuN-_

SD - Http://home.earthlink.net/~kbleyle/SD/index.html
K  - http://home.earthlink.net/~kbleyle/kinky/

    Daylight licked me into shape, I must have been asleep for
days. And moving lips to breathe her name, I opened up my eyes
And found myself alone alone. Alone above a raging sea
That stole the only girl I loved, And drowned her deep inside
of me (The Cure)

_ - _Spikette _ Dru's Dolly - Mercenary_ - _
  _ - _ Head Dominatrix in the Evil _ - _
_ - _   Plan For World Domination, _ - _
  _ - _ With Chains and Stuff _ - _



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "Mark Jones" <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Diaries 5 - Giles
Date: 25 Jun 1998 19:16:22 +0100

Feedback - please please please!! It DOES help me!  Send to
[e-mail]
Disclaimer:  Not mine
Summary - nothing bad has happened.
                    Just a quick look in Giles's diary.

DIARIES  5 -  Giles
**********************

Dear Diary.
Nothing much happened.  I just donÆt know what to do about Buffy though, she
really should learn to do research by herself; I wonÆt be here forever.  She
also needs to be much more disciplined with herself, that way it would be
possible to research and be more prepared herself, instead of leaving it all
to me and Willow.  I know Xander and Cordelia help as well, but somehow, I
donÆt think that they get much done, thereÆs something very strange about
themà  I still worry about her seeing Angel though, I know he thinks he
loves her, but what if he changes, he would be her biggest threats,
especially if he joined forces with Druscilla and Spike; and I donÆt think
she would be able to harm him, even to save herself.  I know she is
physically very strong, but what about mentally?  What would happen?  IÆll
have to find out a bit about Angel and what he was like before he had a soul
and was as bad as the rest of them; IÆll have a talk with her about it
tomorrow, she wonÆt be happyà
Anyway, enough worry for one night!  JennyÆs great as well, if she keeps
going, she may even convince me to use a computer, and I may even _like_
it!!!!
If only I was a bit younger though, I would be much more use to Buffy, and
Angel as well I guess, because I could actually help them, and maybe even
kill a vampire, itÆs been a whileà
Goodnight,
Rupert Giles.
***************

Feedback [e-mail]




-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "Mark Jones" <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Diaries 4 - Xander
Date: 25 Jun 1998 19:02:15 +0100

Feedback - please please please!! It DOES help me!  Send to
[e-mail]
Disclaimer:  Not mine
Summary - nothing bad has happened.
                    Just a quick look in Xanders diary.

DIARIES 4  -  XANDER
*****************************

Dear Diary
ItÆs me here, Xander.  Life is going so well, except for girls, so I guess
itÆs not going well at all!
Cordelia is great, but I hate the way she wonÆt let us æcome outÆ into the
open, I mean whatÆs the big deal, I donÆt think that I am so bad, so why
does she?  She just thinks she can treat me how she wants, when she wants.
SheÆs great, but when will we stop having to go into closets [even though I
love that!!!!!], when will she be able to accept me for me, when will she
start to treat me like a person???  Even Ms Calendar is open about her and
Giles, so why not Cordy and me?
But is it Cordy that I want??  What about Buffy, I mean itÆs not like she
will be with dead boy forever, I do have a chance, donÆt I??
ItÆs strange that Willow has a guy though, I donÆt know why, but it is.  I
mean I want her to be happy and all, but sheÆs Willow.  What does this mean?
Why is life so confusing?
I have just spent the whole evening researching about different vamps to top
off the day.  ItÆs harder to come up with excuses to tell mom though û æcos
IÆm sure she knows that homework has never taken me five hours before; and
that I rarely do it especially not in the school library!!!
Oh well, IÆll just wait and see what happens.
Goodnight,
Xander.
*********

Feedback:  [e-mail]




-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Reflections 1/7
Date: 25 Jun 1998 19:28:30 EDT

Author~Shani
Timeline~ letÆs say between Go Fish and Becoming I & II--Becomings will not
happen here
Summary~ Angelus becomes Angel, but has some thinking to do before going to
Buffy...if he decides to go to Buffy at all.
Disclaimer~ The characters of Buffy the Vampire Slayer belong to Joss Whendon,
Mutant Enemy Productions, Kuzui Enterprises, Sandollar Productions, and 20th
Century Fox.  No infringement intended.  Story for entertainment purposes
only.
Feedback~ YES, YES, YES, YES!!  Please send all comments to [e-mail]


    Sitting in a sunny field, the dark haired man looked in the mirror.  He
stared at his reflection.  Behind him, a young women approached.  Her honey-
blonde hair blew in the wind.  He turned to reach for her hand.  As the two
made contact, the young woman faded to dust.
    Angelus awoke, over come with an odd sense of sadness and loss.  Disgusted,
he stood.  The room was dark, the way he liked it, the way he needed it.
There was a strange silence.  A silence so thick that it began to suffocate
him.  A brilliant light began to glow.  æNo!Æ he wanted to scream, but was
unable.  He dropped to his knees.
    The dark haired man stood on his knees.  The bright light beginning to slowly
fade.  He fell back.  The look of anger now gone, replaced with that of
confusion and innocence.  The light was finally out.  Realization struck him.
He sobbed softly.  Crying for those that his body had destroyed.  Crying for
the innocent dead.
    Angel finally stood up.  He carefully made his way to the door.  He stepped
outside.  Looking first to make sure there was no one around, he ran.  Angel
wasnÆt quite sure where he was going.  On instinct he stopped, just as he had
started.  Finding himself in the cemetery, he glanced around.  There she was.
She looked older.  Even from his distant vantage point, he could see that she
looked considerably lonely.  He wanted to go to her, but wouldnÆt.  Not yet.
Not after all he had done.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    Buffy felt a presence.  She looked around, letting her slaying instincts take
over.  She couldnÆt sense any vampires.  Not even a nearby demon.  æWell, itÆs
almost sunrise anyway.Æ she thought.  After taking one more look around, the
Slayer left the grave yard.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    Relieved that Buffy had left without seeing him, Angel went to his apartment.
æShe should have been able to sense the demon within me, right?Æ  Ignoring the
thought, Angel continued home, hoping to get there before the sun came up.





-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: "Fallen From Grace" (Prologue/11)
Date: 25 Jun 1998 19:43:26 EDT

Inspired by: Watching Luke Perry's performance in the movie with Sarah a month
or so ago, "Fire Escape" by Fastball, "Narcolepsy" and "Motorcycle Drive By"
by Third Eye Blind.
Thanks to: Jen, Sarah, Helen, not only for being wonderful, wonderful beta-
readers, but also for putting up with my fits and starts of writing. Thanks
again to all three of them for helping me through the tough spots.
Notes: Takes place the January or so of Angel's change.
Disclaimers: Blake and the Coordinator, etc, are mine. The rest would appear
to belong to High God Joss.
Feedback: YES! To [e-mail], please, whether it be good or bad or
something in-between. And feel free to e-mail me for missing pieces, too,
later on in the story.

And now, on with the show!

~

                       "Fallen From Grace"

                            Prologue

     "There can be only one," said the dark-skinned man. He was
seated in shadows, the only visible light being that which bounced
off the lenses of his wire-rimmed, tinted glasses. He was staring,
it would have appeared to an outsider, in the direction the young
man standing in front of him with a file folder and a smirk on his
face.
     "Not anymore," replied the young man, laying the folder on the
desk. "Look, sir, if you would, at the case before you."
     The man pulled the folders close, flipping them open, running
his fingers over the pages. "I see..." he said quietly, feeling the
raised dots before him. "Quite interesting."
     "Isn't it, though?" asked the young man, his blue eyes
sparkling with the knowledge of accomplishment. "And we can
increase their numbers, Sir, if you'd let me take on a
slight...project."
     "More Slayers." The blind man thought for a few seconds, then
nodded. "We do need more than the one. To combat the coming
darkness."
     "Exactly, Sir. May I consider myself to have been given
permission, then?"
     The blind man did not respond, only nodding in agreement. With
a slight smile and more of a spring in his step, the younger man wp
turned and walked out of the room.

~

Comments to [e-mail], please!



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: BBETA: REPOST:Life's A Bitch(1/?)
Date: 25 Jun 1998 20:51:38 EDT

TITLE: Life's A Bitch
AUTHOR: mInDy    ([e-mail]      or       [e-mail])
SUMMARY: I don't know how to write one to this, so read.......it's about Buffy
and Angel for those of you who it matters too.
SPOILERS: None at the moment.
TIME LINE: After S/I
IMPORTANT: Angel IS good in my story, he does has soul, and the curse can't be
broken this time.
DISCLAIMER: I own nothing!!
WARNING: Major character may or may not dies. Look at the title and the
language will be explained, but really it's not that bad.


Life's A Bitch
by: mInDy
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*


    Buffy sat in her room. *It's so quiet in here this late.*  Buffy thought, but
that thought left when she heard someone jump up on her roof.  *What the----*
She saw Angel starring at her.  Part of her felt fear run through her, cause
it wasn't so long ago, he was her enemy and wanted her dead.  The other part,
didn't know how to feel right now.  She loved him, true.  She trusted him,
false/true.  She wasn't sure yet, and she wasn't sure if she ever would be.

    "Hey," Angel said, after starring at her, wishing he knew what she was
thinking.

    "Hey," Buffy said.

    Nobody said anything else or moved, their words just hung in the air.  Both
scared to death of each other, but both madly in love.

    Buffy broke the silence, "Angel aren't you gonna......"

    "I can't remember the little....umm..." He said a little nervous, wondering
how he was gonna do this.

    "Oh yeah that." Buffy said looking down, she was just as nervous, the last
time they were alone, when he was good, was that wonderful night. "Angel,
come...."

    "Buffy, DON'T, it's to dangerous for you to do that." He said almost
screaming at her for trying to invite her in.

    "Oh ok, Angel, so were gonna.....Come In, Come In, Come In..Oooppps I said
it, sorry, guess you're gonna half to COME IN." Buffy said to him, and smiled,
trying to break the tension that was building in between them.

    Angel just rolled his eyes at her.  He loved her, and he prayed to God that
one day they could be together like before.

    When Angel got in side, he sat at the end of Buffy's bed.  He kept looking at
her.  *Man if I wasn't a vampire, my palms would be sweating very bad right
now.*

    *I guess since he ain't gonna make the first move, I will.*  Buffy leaned
over to him, and kissed him, hard.  Angel responded, immeadately.  He wanted
nothing more than this.

    When they fell on the back on the bed Angel spoke up, "Buffy, what about your
Mom?"

    "She's off at some art thing. God, Angel, I've missed you so much."

    "I've missed you, too."  It seemed like all the tension that was between
them, left without a trace.

    That night was just like before, but better, in some.  The whole damn world
could have gone to hell, and they wouldn't have cared, they were where they
wanted to be, in each other's embrace.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
TBC...........



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: REPOST: Life's A Bitch(2/?)
Date: 25 Jun 1998 20:52:38 EDT

SEE PART ONE FOR DISCLAIMER
Life's A Bitch
by: mInDy
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

    When Buffy woke up, Angel was gone.  In the spot where he was just a few
hours ago, was a streak of sunlight and a note.  Buffy smiled to herself.
*Thank God he's ok, I don't know if I could handle losing him again.*  Buffy
read the note and got up to get in the shower.

    After she got out of the shower, and got dressed, she decided to walk to
Angel's, she just had to see him, and sense it was summer, there was no
school.

    For some odd reason, Buffy felt weaker than normal.  *I didn't feel like this
last time, maybe it's because it lasted longer, I'll have to talk to Giles,
just leave out the sex part.*  The thought of talking to Giles about sex, gave
her chills.  *Anybody that old shoudn't have sex.  Wait a
minute............except for speacil cases like Angel, or when she gets that
old.  If she got that old.*  Buffy always hated it when that thought came in
her head.  She wasn't gonna be able to grow old, and have kids, and die an old
lady in her warm bed.  She wasn't that lucky, nooooo she had to have a birth
right.  But if it wasn't for that birth right, there would be no Angel.
Angel, a good thought.  In her words "The one freaky thing in my one freaky
world, that still makes sense to me."  She loved him more than she thought
possible.  A slayer and a vampire, now throw that one at Shakespear.  Two
families who didn't want their kids to be together, how about being born
enemies by nature, and having no other choice, no way to make ammends.  *Oh
well, at least we've had a little, which is better than none.*

    As Buffy thought, she eventually made it to Angel's apartment.  She knocked
on the door slowly.  She still couldn't believe what happened did.

    Angel opened the door and saw her standing there, and smiled.

    "Hey,"  Buffy said first, a little nervous but not by much.

    "Hey,"  Angel said back.

    Before either could get in anymore words, Angel's phone rang.  He went to go
answer it, Buffy followed

    "Hello," Angel spoke into the phone.

    "Hi, Angel, this is Giles.  I called Buffy's house and she wasn't there, I'm
guessing she's with you?" Giles spoke.

    "Yeah she's hear, why?"

    "Well, cause I found a really odd saying in one of my books."

    "Yeah what is it?"

    "Well, it......uh.....says, that for if the slayer is by in anyway, not a
virgin, under the next full moon, she will, ummm.......lose all her strength
for the next 7 days and 7 nights.  And sense I know, well.....you know, this
applies to Buffy, and I thought she should be warned."

    "Ok, Giles. Thanks, by the way when is the next full moon?"

    "Tomorrow night, I'm afraid."

    "Well, ok, I'll tell Buffy then."

    Angel hung up the phone and looked at Buffy.  How was he going to explain
this to her?

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
End Part 2



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: REPOST: Life's A Bitch(3/?)
Date: 25 Jun 1998 20:53:31 EDT

SEE PART ONE FOR DISCLAIMER
Life's A Bitch
by: mInDy
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
    "So you're saying, that after tomorrow night, for the next 7 days, I'll be
just as weak as a normal teenager?" Buffy asked.

    "Yeah, I guess that's what I'm saying.  Which means Buffy, DON'T get yourself
in any trouble, if the other vampires know about this, they will certainly be
out after you." Angel warned her, concern showing very clearly in his eyes,
for her.

    "Oh yippi.  So in other words I'm stuck staying in for the next week, huh?"

    "No not exactly, if I'm there, it would be ok, but most likely it would be
easier if you just stay in side."

    "No Bronze?"

    "No Bronze." Angel stated for her.

    "Man, my social life is already bad enough that I'm dating 242-year-old, but
now, I can't even go out at night!" Buffy said and smiled up at Angel,"So what
am I gonna due for the next week? My mom's gone, remember?"

    "Oh yeah, well you could always stay with me.  I would feel better if you
were here." Angel said to her leaning closer.

    "I was hoping you would say that, sooooooo let me go home and get some close
and stuff, ok?"

    "Yeah, that's fine with me." Angel said, and leaned down, and gave her a kiss
on the lips.

    "Ok, then I'll be back BEFORE sundown, don't wanna push my luck." Buffy said
and walked out the door.
                                 *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
    Buffy left her house a little later than planned, but she got to Angel's on
time.  *This is gonna be one weird week!  I mean I'm so use to having my
strength, I don't know how, I'm gonna be without it. Oh well, I get to be with
Angel for a week, a plus side to this bad note.*

    The night went on, and Buffy didn't leave Angel's house, she said she
wouldn't, why he made a trip to the hospital.  While she was gone, Buffy was
laying in Angel's bed listening to music on her headphones, when she heard the
door open, she figured it was Angel, so she went out into the living room, to
see him.  When she got out there, there was guy with a mask on.  He was about
5'10, Buffy guessed.

    The guy saw Buffy and went over to her with his gun pointing at her.  Buffy
started to get really scared, she couldn't fight, she couldn't do anything.
She was the normal teenager, she always wanted to be.

    The events that happened next, were all a blur to Buffy.  She remembered
trying to fight him off.  After she lost that, he pinned her down, and then
pinned her body down with his body.  He raped her, and the whole time, Buffy
was praying Angel would hurry up and come back. The guy left, before Angel
ever came back.

    When Angel came down the stairs to his apartment, the door was wide open.
When he walked in, he found Buffy, on the floor, curled up in a ball crying,
with her clothes torn off.

    "Buffy, God, what happened?" Angel screamed out, and ran to her side,
dropping the blood in his hands on the floor. "Buffy, what happened?" he asked
again.

    "Some guy .......broke in here....and......he....r-r-r-raped me."

    That's what broke Angel.  He couldn't stop crying. "God Buffy, I'm so sorry I
didn't get here sooner."

    "It's not your fault."

    Angel picked Buffy up, and put her in his bed, and covered her up.  Then he
got in bed next to her, and held her, and once she fell asleep, he got up, and
cleaned up the mess in his apartment, put the blood in the fridge, and shut
the door and locked it.  After he did all that, he went back in his room, got
ready for bed, and curled up next to Buffy, and went to sleep.
*~!~*~!~*~!~*~!~*~!~*~!~*
End of Part 3
Feedback......pretty please with sugar on top!



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: REPOST:Life's A Bitch(4/?)
Date: 25 Jun 1998 20:56:08 EDT

SEE PART ONE FOR DISCLAIMER
Life's A Bitch
by: mInDy
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

    When Buffy woke up, she looked next to her and saw Angel laying next to her,
and the events of the night before came flashing back.  She wanted to take a
shower so badly.  She got up, and carefully got off the bed, careful, not to
wake Angel up.  She walked into the bathroom crying, and turned on the water.
That got Angel up.  It took him a minute, to realize what had happened, and
who was in his bathroom.  Once he did, he ran in the bathroom, and held Buffy
back before she got in the shower.

    "Buffy, DON'T take a shower!" Angel screamed at her.

    Buffy looked confused and asked, "Why?"

    "Because, Buffy, if you take a shower, you'll wash off anything that could
help identify who the guy is, who raped you."

    "Oh, ok.......so when am I gonna go to the doctor's then, I don't wanna go
alone."
Buffy said, looking so young and innocent, why would anybody hurt, Angel
thought.

    "I call Willow, ok?"

    "Ok."

    Angel went and called Willow, and told her everything, that happened.  Willow
was over in a matter of minutes to help her friend.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
    On the way back from the doctor's, Buffy and Willow sat in silence.  The
doctor had told Buffy news that she did not want to hear.  The doctor had said
that the chance of catching this guy wasn't that great.  And that had really
upset Buffy, she wanted this guy to pay, and Willow figured so did Angel.
Willow tried all she could, but she really didn't know how to help Buffy.

    "Buffy?"

    "Yeah Will."

    "You know if you need anything, just talk to me, I'll listen, I'm really good
at listening, you can ask Xander, when we were little kids, I use to listen to
him all the time, but then he talks all the time, well anyways, look at this I
keep rambling on, I think I'll shut-up now."

    "Thanks Will, that may not seem like a lot, but that really means something
to me."

    "Well, Buffy, you're my best friend, I am always gonna be here for you."

    "Thanks, I needed to hear that."

    The rest of the way home, was in more silence, but comfortable silence.
Untill Willow turned on the radio, and Mariah Carey's song "Anytime You Need A
Friend" came on, and the two of them just looked at each other, thinking the
exact same thing.  That Buffy would get through this, with the help of her
friends.  Buffy started singing the song, and then Willow joined in.  Willow
may not have known how to help her friend, but this was a start.


< If you're lonely
And need a friend
And troubles seem like
They never end
Just remember to keep the faith
And love will be there to light the way

Anytime you need a friend
I will be here
You'll never be alone again
So don't you fear
Even if you're miles away
I'm by your side
So don't you ever be lonely
Love will make it alright

When the shadows are closing in
And your spirit diminishing
Just remember you're not alone
And love will be there
To guide you home

Anytime you need a friend
I will be here
You'll never be alone again
So don't you fear
Even if you're miles away
I'm by your side
So don't you ever be lonely
Love will make it alright

If you just believe in me
I will love you endlessly
Take my hand
Take me into your heart
I'll be there forever baby
I won't let go
I'll never let go

Anytime you need a friend
I will be here
You'll never be alone again
So don't you fear
Even if you're miles away
I'm by your side
So don't you ever be lonely
It's alright
It's alright>

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
END PART 4



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: REPOST: Life's A Bitch(5/?)
Date: 25 Jun 1998 20:57:03 EDT

SEE PART ONE FOR DISCLAIMER.....
Life's A Bitch
by:mInDy
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

    Angel was listening to his radio, waiting on Buffy and Willow to get back.
He was very worried about all of this.  He knew Buffy could handle vampires,
demons, whatever, and he knew she would get through this.....but how could he
help?  With the vampires and demons, he could help her fight them, tell her
she beat the master, she could kill them.  But this was different, this was
something he never knew much about.  He wanted her to be ok, he wanted it to
be like it was going to be, how he had planned it to be this whole week, but
now it wasn't going to be.

    Someone was opening his door.  He went to see who it was.  There she was, by
herself, he guessed Willow dropped her off and left the two of them be alone.
Angel didn't know what to do, he just stood there staring at her.  She didn't
look like Buffy, his Buffy, just a copied of image of her.  Her face wasn't as
full of life as it had been.  Her eyes were, a pale green, and not the emarald
color he loved so much.  Her face was deathly pale, almost the color of his,
except she had a hint of rose coloring from the heat outside.

    She walked over to him and just looked at him.  She needed him now, she knew
in her heart that it wasn't his fault.  She would never blame it on him.  She
walked a little closer to him, and put her arms around her neck, holding him,
needing him to hold her too.

    And he did just that.  He put his arms around her, and completed the hug,
pulling her closer.

    He had no idea on what to do right now, just to hold her and never let go.
To never let another man hurt her like that again.  To always love her, till
death do they part, and then in heaven.  Which, he knew he could.

    A song in the background played, that fit the moment so right, they started
swinging lightly to the music.  The song could've been sung from both of them,
at different parts, it sounded like the other one was singing.  And when the
song was over, they didn't stop their dance.

<Where do we go from here?
This isn't where we intended to be
We had it all, you believed in me
I believed in you
Certainties disappear
What do we do for our dream to survive?
How do we keep all our passions alive,
As we used to do?

Deep in my heart I'm concealing
Things that I'm longing to say
Scared to confess what I'm feeling
Frightened you'll slip away

You must love me
You must love me
Why are you at my side?
How can I be any use to you now?
Give me a chance and I'll let you see how
Nothing has changed

Deep in my heart I'm concealing
Things that I'm longing to say
Scared to confess what I'm feeling
Frightened you'll slip away

You must love me
You must love me
Why are you at my side?
How can I be any use to you now?
Give me a chance and I'll let you see how
Nothing has changed

You must love me>

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
End Part 5



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: NEW ONE:Life's A Bitch(6/?)
Date: 25 Jun 1998 20:57:22 EDT


    Buffy was sitting on Angel's bed, while Angel was in the shower.  They had
come to the conclusion, that it was much safer if Buffy stayed with Angel, and
that she go with Angel where ever he went, as long as this prophecy thing was
going on.

    As Buffy was sitting there reading her magazine, the phone rang.

    "Hello?" Buffy asked into the phone.

    "Hi, may I speak to Buffy Summers, please." A female voice on the other line
responded.

    "This is she, how may I help you?" Buffy asked.

    "Well you see, we looked up the records on the man who raped you, and we have
come to a conclusion." The woman replied.

    The conversation went on, and when Angel stepped out of the bathroom, Buffy
was in tears starring at the phone.

    "What's the matter Buffy?" Angel asked comcerned about what was going on with
his Buffy.

    "Angel...that was the lady from the clinic, they found the guy who raped me."
Buffy answered, still crying.

    "Really?  Who was it?" Angel asked ready to kick whoever's ass it was.

    "The guy who raped me was.........."

END PART 6
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Cliff Hangers, Don't ya love 'em???

"There is fate, but it only takes you so far, it's up to YOU to do the rest"
~Can't Hardly Wait
"Do you know what the saddest thing in the world is? Loving someone who used
to love you."
~Anon



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: [e-mail] (Charity C. T.)
Subject: BUFFYFIC: My Moria (7/?)
Date: 25 Jun 1998 18:16:31 -0700

TITLE: My Moria #7
AUTHOR: Taygeta
E-MAIL: [e-mail]
FEEDBACK:  Please with a cherry on top!
DISTRIBUTION: Sure, just tell me first.
DESCRIPTION: The Buffy gang, 20 years later.
DISCLAIMER: The characters of Moria Summers-Harris, Deirdre Lindley,
Jacob Ross, and Scott Thomas are my own.  However, the characters of
Buffy, Xander, and any other character taken from the Buffy the Vampire
Slayer television series belong to their creator, Joss Whedon, and their
owners, Mutant Enemy productions, Kuzui Productions, Sanddollar
Productions, and 20th Century Fox.

****************************
My Moria #7
By: Taygeta

    Giles stepped back into the house only to walk into the height of
anxiety.  In the driveway, the slamming of car doors and the laughter and
chatter of youth could be heard.  As such sounds approached them, it was
beginning to dawn on them that not only would Moria's life be changed by
all of this, their lives would be spiraling decidedly backwardsàback to a
time when they had never felt peace.

    "Hey," Moria came in with a smile, and following behind her were
Scott Thomas, her boyfriend, and their best friends, Deirdre Lindley and
Jacob Ross.

    "Umàis there, like some kind of party going on?"  Scott asked as
he eyed the amount of people in the living room; however, the adults were
a little too preoccupied to answer.

    Little Giles Xander Rosenberg-Osgoode began to fuss in Willow's
arms, and the baby was brought to the attention of Moria and Deirdre who
approached the little child cooing, "Ohàhi, little one, how are you?"

    Cordelia exhaled deeply and glanced at Buffy and Xander, who met
her glance with one of equal uneasiness.  They had had a perfectly
planned out conversation to give Moira, but with the presence of Scott,
Deirdre, and Jacob, their plan was decidedlyànot.

    "Mr. Summers-Harris?"  Jacob asked as he pulled his glance away
from the baby and towards his friend's parental units.

    "Yes, Jacob?" replied Xander who was immediately brought out of
his thoughts with the words 'Mr. Summers-Harris' echoing in his ears, and
he wondered had it really been that long?

    "How's that novel you were working on?" he asked, recalling the
rough of the first chapter he had read the last time he was there.

    Moria's father smiled as he glanced at his wife who frowned at
his look and wondered what was going on in his head.

    "It's going great, in fact, I've just go the second chapter
written up last night," he said as he glanced at his daughter's friends,
all of which, he was glad, were Summers-Harris fans, due to his daughter,
to a fault.  "Why don't you, Deirdre, and Scott come to my study and I'll
let you guys take a read at it?"

    The three looked very tempted to go because their friend's father
had left them at a cliffhanger at the end of the first chapter, and they
glanced at Moria, waiting for her approval.  They knew how much she hated
it when they always came to her house to check out her father's latest
stash of writing, but she was in good humor today and sighed, "Go
aheadàbesides it's * great *!"

    "You can fulfill your need to read later, G-man, you can get
yourself an autographed rough," Xander replied to the former watcher as
he saw his miffed expression after not being invited to read, "The
written one."

    "Nice going, honey," Buffy whispered into her husband's ear as he
was about to exit the living room, "You just found the best way to get
out of this."

    "You didn't think I was going to leave you here to contend with
our so-much-like-her-mother daughter, do you?" he said jokingly despite
the seriousness of the moment, but he kissed his wife's forehead and
continued seriously.  "Don't worry, I'll just show them the draft on the
computer screenàthe protected documentàand come back here in a few
minutes."

    She looked at him carefully and replied, "You betteràeven the
super strength I lost a few-odd years ago, wouldn't help me out in this,
especially since *she* now has it."

    "You'll do fine," he said, giving her a kiss on the cheek before
he walked over to his daughter's snickering friends, "Just wait until
you're older, kidsà"

    "Uncle Rupert," Moria said with a smile as she noticed her
godfather and promptly gave him a kiss on the cheek, "how are you?"

    "Just fine," he replied with a hesitant expression, "Umàand
you're doing well, I hope?  Keeping with your studies?

    "Of course," she said obediently, so much that Giles had his
suspicions as to the definition of her 'of course' àit reminded her a
little too much of her mother.

    "Moiraàhi," the watcher interjected with a smile, "We haven't
metàum, I'm a friend of your parentsàfrom high school," she extended her
hand, "Cordelia Chase."

    The young girl took the hand with a weak smile and said, "It's
nice to meet youàumàMs. Chase."

    "Oh, please, call me Cordelia," she insisted as she glanced at
Buffy carefully, and caught her eye.

    "Moria, honey, Cordelia works as a curator at a historical
museumàin New York," Buffy began, and before her daughter could make to
say something nice about her job, she rushed and continued, "but she's
also has another jobàas a Watcher."

    She frowned slightly at this foreign occupation,
"AàW-watcheràwhat exactly is that?"

    A silence set in at her question and the entrance of Xander into
the living room broke the tension slightly, but it lingered still until
Cordelia spoke.  "Umàlet's seeàwellàa - a Watcher is someone who looks
after somebody and teaches themàtrains them."

    "Okayàbut what exactly does the somebody have to be trained for?"
 Moria continued to probe the topic at hand.

    All eyes fell on the present Watcher, who chewed on her lower lip
as she thought of a response, "You see, Moria, there's one in every
generationà"

_____________________________________________________________________
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Or call Juno at (800) 654-JUNO [654-5866]



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: A NEW Buffy Fanfic Site
Date: 25 Jun 1998 21:57:38 EDT

Hello everyone.  You likely have no idea who I am, a fact which undoubtadly
takes away from this quick letter, but I hafta' try.  :-)  I have, if anyone
will remember, sorta' written two fics and actually written one.  ;)  (If
you're keeping score, they would be 'Finals' of which two parts were sent,
'Memoria Tenere Memoriam' of which one part was sent, and 'The Libarian's
Discovery' which was completed.)

Now, my reason for bothering you with something that is fanfic.  I am
currently creating a NEW Buffy fanfic site which I call buffic.  This is a
site devoted to QUALITY fanfic.  I have recently become VERY disipointed with
many of the popular fanfic sites avalable.  I feel that the quality of many
(not all, mind you) of the writings is extremely poor, often times for
'stupid' reasons such as spelling and grammar.  Such problems have led me to
not even have a real desire to search through the hundreds of fics looking for
something worth reading.  That's why I've created buffic.

As I said, buffic has been created for QUALITY fanfic.  Obvously I need the
fanfic.  ;)  That's where you come in.  I beg you to PLEASE request stories to
be placed in this site.  This is fanfic that you feel is GOOD... that was
really worth reading.  Now, I'm not looking for perfection.  I would be
wasting my time.  ;)  Basically anything that has a good story is potential
quality.  Buffic will offer (in fact, it will require) an extencive editing
process before being posted on the site to ensure that the quality is
achieved.  Any story with a good base should be able to be rescued.  :-)

So, simply put, PLEASE request fanfic!  All I need ya' to do is e-mail me at
[e-mail] with the author's name, e-mail address, and the title of
their fic.  And yes, you may submit your own fic.  In fact, DO!  It's that
simple.  :)

Review: looking for good fanfic... please submit name, e-mail, and title to
[e-mail]

Now, as you read above, stories will be going through an extencive editing
process.  I HOPE I won't be able to handle it all, so if you think you'll be
able to take on some of the work (even a very little), please contact me at
[e-mail] for more info.

Thanks a TON for sticking with me on this.  I really hope you guys can help.
:)

Emily :)



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: "Fallen From Grace" (1/11)
Date: 25 Jun 1998 22:01:50 EDT

Notes: Takes place the January or so of Angel's change. E-mail me for missing
pieces. :) Thanks to Jen, Sarah, Helen, not only for being wonderful,
wonderful beta-readers, but also for putting up with my fits and starts of
writing. Thanks again to all three of them for helping me through the tough
spots.
Notes: Takes place the January or so of Angel's change. E-mail me for missing
pieces.
Disclaimers: Blake and the Coordinator, etc, are mine. The rest would appear
to belong to High God Joss.
Feedback: YES! To [e-mail], please, whether it be good or bad or
something in-between.

And now, on to the show!

~

                               One

     "Groovy digs," Pike murmured to himself as he walked into the
Bronze. Quiet town, this was. He wondered how Buffy liked it, after
the sights and sounds of that shithole they called the City of
Angels. He smirked slightly to himself. He wondered, actually, how
it was Buffy had kept from going terminally insane in a place like
Sunnydale. In the two days he'd been here, trying to find out where
the kids in his age bracket hung out, nothing had _happened_. Of
course, he figured, she might not be in the area anymore. She might
have left, thanks to terminal boredom. Even if this was where the
records said her mom had relocated to.
     "S'up?" he said, waving to a leggy brunette as he walked
through the doorway. He flashed her a smile, but got back only a
scowl for his troubles. He shrugged. Okay then, he'd just find the
Buffster, say his hellos, and see if she was in the mood to hang a
while.
     There was a halfway decent band up on the stage, but Pike knew
they'd never make it playing a gig like this place. Cute little
club, but too obviously trendy to attract anybody with
_connections_.
     He ordered a beer from the bar, flashing a fake ID and
grinning at the waitress when she fell for it. Then he walked over
to the shadowed area behind the stairway to the second level of the
club. Nice back here, he thought, taking a sip. He could stand
apart and watch things a while, maybe Buffy'd even come right
through-- that way, he wouldn't have to worry about checking the
address he'd gotten earlier and possibly risk the whole stalker-boy
deal. She wouldn't be impressed by that sort of thing, he had the
feeling.
     Problem was, he realized about two seconds after he took up
his position, there was already somebody back here, waiting. He
found himself face-to-face with a set of piercing eyes, and
something akin to a scowl on the face of a guy who was probably in
his mid-twenties. "Whoa, problem, man?"
     "Not as such," the guy said, shaking his head. "Except you're
blocking my view."
     "Oooh, sorry," Pike grinned, moving slightly to the side. "I
take it this is the hotspot for watching the chicks, then?"
     "You could say so."
     "In that case," Pike said, "maybe you could give me a hand--
you look like you know your way around here pretty well.
     The guy shrugged. "Maybe. What's up?"
     "I'm looking for an ex-girlfriend," he said. "Her name's Buffy
Summers. Know of her?"
     The guy raised an eyebrow-- an affirmation, Pike knew, whether
the guy would admit to it or not-- and shrugged. "Seen her around.
What is it you have to talk to her about?"
     "Nothing you'd be interested in," Pike said, though his tone
wasn't a confrontational one. "Just catchin' up on old times."
     "I see." The guy's eyes narrowed slightly. "Another one of you
'old friends', hm?" He grinned. "She's got a lotta those, doesn't
she."
     Pike raised an eyebrow. "Huh?"
     The guy shrugged. "Nah. Nevermind." There was now something of
a smirk on his face. "She's just over that way," he said, the smirk
getting a little bigger. "Good luck." There was a definate bitter
cast to the words.
     "Thanks," Pike said, though he had the sudden feeling this guy
wasn't completely on the up-and-up. But he saw Buffy, and he
recognized her-- god, did he recognize her, in a tight black dress
that was hugging every curve her body had to offer, and doing it
quite nicely-- and he had come to talk to her. So he didn't see any
reason not to go over.
     "No problem," the guy assured him. Then he moved back to stand
against the walls.
     With a half-wave, Pike turned to walk to the table where Buffy
and her three friends were seated.
                                *
     "So then, in this, like, completely and totally _unfair_ way,
Mrs. Watson tells me if I don't, you know, pay less attention to
Pep Club and more to the way I'm performing on my tests, she'll
tell Mr. Snyder and make me get kicked _out_ of Pep Club!" Cordelia
finished her wail with an exaggerated sigh, collapsing helplessly
against Xander's shoulder as the other teen moved his arm around
her.
     Buffy and Willow exchanged glances, rolling their eyes.
"Sorry, Cordie," Buffy said, "but maybe you should have thought
about study time before you went and got involved in other things."
     "But this is _Pep_ Club!" Cordelia wailed. "My _mother_ wants
me to do this!" She sat up abruptly, and Xander had to move quickly
to keep from losing his hold on her. "Besides, Little Miss Save-
The-World, who are _you_ to be telling _me_ about prioritizing?"
     "Cordelia, Buffy can't really do anything about her Slaying--"
     "Whereas I should be more responsible, fine, but why is it
always _me_ who has to suffer? I mean, why can't it be somebody
_else_ for once?"
     "Maybe it's just your sparkling personality-- maybe it
attracts problems like dog shit does flies," spoke up a new voice,
from directly behind Buffy.
     The Slayer almost recognized the tone, the sarcasm, the blind
disregard for anything resembling polite behavior-- but she
couldn't be sure. And either way, she wasn't in the mood to deal.
"Excuse me," she started to say, "but if you're going to break in
with an idea like that--" She broke off as soon as she saw who it
was who was standing behind her, realizing that as crazy and off-
base as her suspicions of a few seconds earlier had seemed, they
had been a hundred percent correct. "_Pike_?!" she screached,
shooting up out of her chair and wrapping her arms around the man
standing behind her. She could feel her friends' eyes upon her, but
somehow that didn't matter. "Oh my _god_," she said as she stared
at him. "What are you doing here?"
     "This," Pike said, a moment before he kissed her, hard on the
lips. Buffy gasped slightly, feeling his tongue against her teeth
as he thrust it into her mouth, and she drew back a little. He let
her go easily, his eyes gleaming slightly. "Nice to see you again,"
he said.
     Buffy stared at him, slightly dazed-- and she wasn't the only
one. She could practically feel Xander's eyes boring holes through
the back of her skull to Pike, and she knew Cordelia would be
horrified-- Pike hadn't changed his appearance in the slightest
since she'd last seen him, two years ago. Despite how the leather
he was decked out in was somewhat mussed, it still looked neater
than she remembered him, and his chin and cheeks were covered in a
few days' worth of stubble.
     "Oh...wow," she said quietly. "Pike. I..." She turned back to
the table. "This is Cordie, Xander, and Willow," she said. She
smiled slightly. "We're, you know, really good friends, and we just
kind of hang out here at times and--" She broke off, obviously
realizing that she was babbling.
     He looked them over, and nodded somewhat approvingly.
     Suddenly aware of how she was staring, Buffy looked back at
the table with a half-smile. "Pull up a chair?" she offered weakly.
     Pike shook his head. "No thanks," he said. "Just looking for
you. Wanted to stop in and say hey, but I'm sort of just stopping
here on my way to school in Phoenix."
     "Phoenix?"
     "Yea. Engineering stuff." He grinned when her eyes widened
slightly. "What, Buff, you think I was just another schmuck with no
plans?" He shook his head. "Only knew me for a few weeks, and still
she judges...thought you might have gotten past that."
     "I-- I am, sort of," she said, feeling a blush creep into her
cheeks as she tossed a look back at the table. Her friends had
three of the most incredulous, surprised looks on their faces that
she'd ever seen them wearing, and Buffy had the idea that if she
didn't handle things carefully at this point, especially after that
kiss, things were going to get sticky-- and fast. "Look..." she
began, "can we take this outside?"
     He raised an eyebrow. "Sure," he said. He offered her his arm.
"Let me walk you?"
     She shook her head, moving toward the door already. Pike
followed her, ignoring the stares of her friends, as the two of
them passed the shadowed corner where he'd met the guy who had
pointed Buffy out to him. He must have found whoever it was he was
looking for, Pike decided, because he was no longer standing there.
                                *
     "Pike..." Buffy began, as soon as they were out the door.
     "Yeah?" he asked.
     "This..." She smiled weakly. "This is a surprise."
     "Good one, I hope."
     "Sort of."
     He looked at her for a long moment, then nodded. "Oh...I see.
Okay." He nodded. "My bad. Two years, I should have realized you've
probably moved on. No Watcher and all that."
     She raised an eyebrow. "Actually, I have a new one. How did
you know--"
     "I figured out where Merrick kept his junk, after you left.
Picked up some pretty cool reading from that place..." She was
staring at him again, with that disbelieving look. He sighed. "Aw,
Buff, would you cut that out?"
     "Cut what out?"
     He shook his head. "Staring at me every time I say something
that might mean I'm slightly more than the bottom-feeding idiot you
apparently take me for."
     Her brow furrowed. "I do not!"
     "Seems like it," he said. Then he shrugged. "But hey, if you
say so, who'm I to argue?" She was silent, so he continued. "Most
of those books say that when a Watcher is killed, the team is
presumed broken, so you would then be taken out of action and a new
Slayer would be called..." he trailed off when he saw how far her
jaw had dropped. "What now?"
     "What do you mean, taken out of action?"
     He shrugged. "Doesn't say," he said. "I just kind of assumed
it meant you'd be retired, you know, no more Chosen One and no more
Slaying."
     "Whatever," she said. "Continue?"
     He shook his head. "Nah." He glanced over at her, away from
the street they were walking along. "Guess it was kind of arrogant
of me to just show up like that."
     "Semi," she admitted, "but it's nice seeing you. How long you
around for?"
     "I can be here a few weeks," he said. "'Cause classes don't
start till mid-February. But if you want me gone..."
     "No!" she said quickly. "No, this is good." She smiled
slightly, then shook her head. "I'm glad to see you. Really." She
paused a moment. "Just...Pike..."
     "Yeah?"
     "No more...kissing, okay?"
     That confused him, but he shrugged. "Your call, okay. Any
particular reason, other than that you think I'm an uneducated
slob?"
     "I do not," she said with a slight smile. "And no...it's not
you." She shook her head. "I kind of...don't want to talk about it.
Bad relationship."
     "Ah," he said. "And you're sure you wouldn't like me to get
you out of the funk?"
     "Very," she replied. They had by this point walked clear
around the block, and Buffy found herself standing on the steps
into the Bronze, again. She smiled. "So," she said. "See you
around? I'm on patrol later tonight, if you want to come along..."
     "Nah," he said. "I'll leave the Slaying to you, Buff. See you
around."
     She nodded, and Pike walked away, off into the night.

~

Comments to [e-mail], please!



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: [e-mail] (sheila taylor)
Subject: Re: BUFFYFIC: My Moria (7/?)
Date: 25 Jun 1998 18:57:53 +0500

Great!  I was waiting for an other installment.  I liked the idea of
Cordy as watcher over Buffy's daughter.  I am really interested in
reading the next chapter and discovering how Cordy handles telling Moria.
 I wonder if Moria's three friends are in line to become the next scooby
gang?

Sheila



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: [e-mail]
Subject: BUFFYFIC: You Always Hurt The Ones You Love
Date: 25 Jun 1998 22:52:57 -0400

Name: You Always Hurt the Ones You Love
Author: Northlight
email:  [e-mail]
Content:  Post Becoming Part 2 Buffy angst
Summary:  Buffy meets someone after leaving Sunnydale, and they share
their stories.
Disclaimer:  Buffy and all related events belong to Joss Whedon.  Erik
and all his story belong to Marvel Comics and appear in Thunderbolts.

::I'm so... so sorry.  It's all my fault.  I failed you -- like I've
failed everyone else -- :::
-Thunderbolts #16

    Buffy stared into her rapidly cooling cup of coffee blankly, the soft
strains of a Shania Twain song washing over her.  Her hands were clasped
around the Styrofoam cup, more out of a lack of anything else to do with
them than in a desire for warmth.

    Her eyes, though red rimmed, were dry.  She had cried her fill since
she had left Sunnydale behind.  Now, she was just... empty.  Buffy
didn't think, she didn't feel -- it was the only way to keep the agony
from sparking back through her.

    She was numb.

    There was somebody standing over her, hesitating.  Buffy didn't look
up.  She didn't care who it was, she didn't care about anything.

    "May I sit down?" a rumbling male voice finally spoke.

    Buffy finally lifted her head, with agonizing slowness.  She had
expected to see another oily man ready to move in on the apparently
helpless teenager and already had a denial forming on her lips. It never
crossed them.

    Whatever the man may have been, it wasn't a predator.  He was large and
muscular, but his eyes had a deep sorrow that struck a chord in Buffy.
He gestured around the small dinner.  "All the other tables are taken,"
he explained.

    Buffy nodded, slightly surprised by her response.  She didn't want to
be with anybody, she didn't want to deal with the small talk and
questions that were always directed towards her.  But, somehow, she had
the feeling that this man wouldn't be asking about her hometown and
where she was headed.

    He smiled briefly, an expression that didn't reach his eyes, and sat
down at the booth across from Buffy.  He set his coffee down and
mimicked Buffy's position, his large hands clasped around the cup.

    They sat in silence for a long moment.  "Buffy," she said finally,
forcing her name out past her constricted throat.

    His head jerked up in surprise, as if he had forgotten that she was
there with him.  He hesitated a moment, and Buffy thought that he
wouldn't answer.  She wondered what had made her speak in the first
place.  Her eyes had shifted back to the placid surface of her coffee
before he finally responded.  "Erik."

    Buffy lifted her head, darting a quick, drawn smile towards him in
acknowledgment.

    They each slid back into an isolated silence, both lost to their own
thoughts.

    "Erik?" Buffy said suddenly.  The familiar image of Angel, his eyes
wide with shock and confusion, his hands reaching out to her
beseechingly, had risen in her mind once again.  The haunting image was
enough to make a quiver of pain threaten the comforting numbness.

    "What?" His voice was raw with pain when he answered.

    "Trade stories?  You tell me your pain, I'll tell you mine," Buffy
replied.  He looked about ready to bolt at her question, so Buffy
quickly altered her request.  "Or maybe, you could just listen...?"

    "No... I need someone to talk to.  And at the moment, you're the only
person I have."  The spark of sorrow in his eyes ignited briefly at that
statement.

    Their eyes met, and they stared at each other uncomfortably.  Each of
them needed to speak, but neither of them knew how to begin.  They had
been silent for so long, and it was a habit that was hard to break.

    Erik cracked first.  "My brother... he's dead.  It was all my fault,
and I couldn't even save him!"  His voice was shaking.  Erik's hands
unconsciously clenched around the cup he held, sending the lukewarm
liquid splashing across the scarred tabletop.

    Neither of them moved to clean it.  "My lover is dead.  It was my fault
twice over, and I couldn't save him!"

    "My family was ruined, shamed, and destroyed because of my actions.  I
did something that I knew was wrong without a thought of what it would
mean for those who I left behind..."

    "He was lost to me because I was a selfish little girl.  And I lost my
last chance to make things right because I wasn't fast enough!  I saw
him die -- begging me to explain why he was hurting, and I couldn't!"
Buffy's voice was filled with self recrimination, and tears threatened
to end their absence.

    "My brother died in my arms, only hours after I had gone to him to try
and set things right."  Erik looked down at his hands, as if expecting
to see his brother's blood still coating them.

    "I walked out on my mother, and she doesn't want me back.  She never
understood me, I was always too much trouble.  She deserved better than
me."

    "I betrayed the man who saved my life.  He trusted me, and I turned on
him," Erik countered.

    "I always hurt my friends -- they've suffered so much because of my
presence in their lives.  And now, they're hurting because I left them.
Everybody whose life I touch, I hurt."  The tears began trickling down
Buffy's pale cheeks as the memory of her friends standing before the
school surfaced in her mind.  Willow, in her wheelchair.  Giles, bruised
and bandaged.  Xander, his arm held in a cast.  And they had all looked
so worried... so lost.

    Erik cast a brief, sympathetic glance at her before returning to his
own misery.  "I betrayed the woman that I cared for, I abandoned my
friends when they needed me. I... I always end up betraying
somebody..."  The memory of Dallas' face sent pain stabbing through his
heart.  The look of betrayal on her face had been heartbreaking -- and
knowing what had happened to her afterwards didn't help his concience
any.  And what of his team?  How would they fare without him?

    The air around them was thick with tension and unspoken memories.  Erik
finally tore his eyes away from the girl's tearing ones and grabbed a
napkin, swiping at the spreading coffee puddle.

    "So, do we offer the wise advise that usually comes at this point or
leave it as is?" Buffy choked out, cutting through the suddenly
uncomfortable silence which had claimed them.

    Erik looked at her, a tight smile determinedly forced onto his lips.
"Nah.  I've fucked up my own life quite enough -- I don't think I'm the
best person to be telling someone else how to fix theirs."

    "I can understand that," Buffy replied.  She glanced down at her watch,
and sighed softly.  Time to get moving again.  "I've gotta go, my bus is
coming soon..." Buffy said, standing up and sliding out of the booth.

    "I should be going too," Erik said, following Buffy's actions.  He held
his hand out to her, and Buffy's hand met his own.  "It was nice meeting
you, Buffy... And I hope that everything turns out well for you."

    "Same to you, Erik."

    With one last smile, this one slightly less sorrowful, Buffy headed out
the door.  Maybe, one day soon, she'd try and make things right.

End

http://www.geocities.com/Area51/Lair/7493/buffy.html



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: [e-mail]
Subject: BUFFYFIC: DISCUSS: Back from beyond the grave, and in need of some major resurrection
Date: 25 Jun 1998 23:08:48 EDT

Hey again, fellow ficers...

I just got my computer back together after another computer-crashing
stunt by the crasher of all crashers, mon frere. The good news is he's
now forbidden to touch my computer, and I've got a new hard-drive that's
twice as big as my old one. The bad news is that once again, everything
I've ever saved has been mercilessly deleted!

Here's what I'm asking. If you have *all* the parts of reunion, and if
you are willing to serve them to my server in bite-sized-pieces, LET ME
KNOW- DON't SEND THEM TO ME UNTIL I TELL YOU TO! This is a measure to
avoid the flooding of my pathetic mailbox. I've been on here for about
five hours sorting through all the stuff I missed in my two weeks in
hell. Maybe I can finish Reunion tomorrow! (Wouldn't that be lovely!!)

Throwing myself at your mercy once again...

-Ingrid

"There are a lot of sheep, aren't there?"

"eh?"

--Monty Python

_____________________________________________________________________
You don't need to buy Internet access to use free Internet e-mail.
Get completely free e-mail from Juno at http://www.juno.com
Or call Juno at (800) 654-JUNO [654-5866]



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: [e-mail] (Charity C. T.)
Subject: Re: DISSCUSION: BUFFYFIC: My Moria (7/?)
Date: 25 Jun 1998 19:36:11 -0700

On Thu, 25 Jun 1998 18:57:53 +0500 [e-mail] (sheila taylor)
writes:
>Great!  I was waiting for an other installment.  I liked the idea of
>Cordy as watcher over Buffy's daughter.  I am really interested in
>reading the next chapter and discovering how Cordy handles telling
>Moria.  I wonder if Moria's three friends are in line to become the
>next scooby gang?
>
>Sheila

Glad you liked it.  As for Moria's three friends being the next scooby
gang...totally possible, just not too sure how I can word it in.  That
would mean I have to weave two plots into one and have them mesh well.
So...maybe.

Charity
aka
Taygeta
Writer of "Capeside:the Hellmouth," "My Moria," "Chronicles of the White
Knight," "In Opacitatem Habitant Modo," "Elan Vital," "BSC:Freshman,"
"Summer Waves," "The Summer After," and "Beyond the Creek."

Co-president of the Buffy-Xander Lovers Club
To Join, fill out the form at:
http://www.geocities.com/televisioncity/set/9257/bxlclub.html

Keeper of Xander's quote, "People don't fall in love with what's right in
front of them. People want the dream-what they can't have. The more
unattainable, the more attractive."
Keeper of Xander's awkward moment with Buffy  (Phases)
Keeper of Xander's ability to put together a M-16 in 57 seconds

"But you saved me. As difficult and as frustrating as it's been
sometimes, your goddamned strict rationalism and science have saved
me a thousand times over. You've kept me honest ... made me a whole
person. I owe you everything, Scully, and you owe me nothing ... I don't
know if I wanna do this alone ... I don't know if I can ... and if I quit
now they win."  Fox Mulder from The X-files Movie: Fight the Future.

"She wasn't you...when I was about to be trampled by those bulls, all I
could think about was that I would never see you again," -Richard to
Caroline
"Mulder, I wouldn't put myself on the line for anyone, but you," -Scully
"Our love is like a rose...beautiful when in bloom, but it'll never
last," Tuxedo Mask to Sailormoon
"She's everything," -Dawson about Joey
"Everything I've ever done has been for you!" Ethan Hawke in Great
Expectations.



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: "Fallen From Grace" (2/11)
Date: 26 Jun 1998 10:42:39 EDT

Notes: Takes place the January or so of Angel's change. E-mail me for missing
pieces. :)
Disclaimers: Blake and the Coordinator, etc, are mine. The rest would appear
to belong to High God Joss.
Feedback: YES! To [e-mail], please, whether it be good or bad or
something in-between.

~

                               Two

     Sunnydale High School. Pike wasn't quite sure what he had
expected, but he knew it hadn't been to find Buffy a junior-- back
two years, comparitively speaking. She'd told him once that she'd
skipped first grade, and he had always figured she'd sort of made
up for that later on in life by being such a ditz for however long
it was she'd been a ditz for. But then again, who knew? By the time
she burned down Hemery's gym, though, he supposed she had probably
more than made up for the advancement-- and so it didn't make that
much of a splash to discover that after she'd transferred what with
her record and any placement exams she had probably been required
to take, that she'd been placed a grade or two back. Though the
fact had to suck, he decided.
     Exactly why he'd dropped high school and then gotten a GED
when he'd decided to try for some engineering classes at Phoenix U.
Low profile, low cost college. He was lucky to have gotten in, and
he was looking forward to going. So he wasn't quite sure why he had
decided to look Buffy up. But he had, and now he was standing in
front of her high school, a good twenty minutes after the beginning
of first period.
     Merrick's books had spoken of Sunnydale as being a Hellmouth,
whatever that was. Pike had looked it up as soon as Buffy had told
him that's where she was headed for. She'd been upset when he had
told her he was off to San Antonio, but they had both known
anything they had between them probably wouldn't have lasted much
longer, thanks to the Slayage she was doing and his own problems
with constantly killing things.
     Now that he was on his way to Arizona, he had decided it was
time to get a little closure as far as Miss Buffy Summers was
concerned. And last night's encounter at the Bronze hadn't done
much to help him get any of that. So, he figured, this would be as
good a place as any to see the Buffster in her natural enviornment.
He'd be able to get a handle on how she'd changed, what about her
he still knew, and if he was lucky he could get the information
firsthand from the other kids around school. He just hoped it
wouldn't mean he was going to have to deal with anybody as shallow
as the rich bitches Buffy had known back in LA. Though, knowing his
luck, he wouldn't be surprised.
     So with a deep breath and a silent prayer that everything
would wind up going okay, Pike moved toward the entrance to the
school. Best place to start was the library, he decided. It had
said in Merrick's books that most Watchers staked out occupations,
when they had them, where they would be exposed to knowledge and be
constantly aware of what was going on around them. The highest-
ranking place for someone like that would be something more like a
computer teacher, Pike thought, but what were the chances of
anybody involved in the Watcher's Network being adept enough with
computers to hold a position like that? Of course, the next best
thing would have to suffice. And so he headed for the library.
     He was, he knew, basing this on the completely random
assumption that Buffy's new Watcher would have a job somewhere near
her. Which made sense, given that they were supposed to _watch_
their charges...
     Too much thinking and not enough doing, he finally decided.
Time to go in, find the library, determine if the librarian was a
Watcher, and if not, boogie.
     Pike took the steps up the front walk two at a time, and moved
swiftly and easily through the hallway. It wasn't until he was
inside that he realized he had no idea whatsoever of where the
library was located. Looked like he'd just have to methodically
search the whole place, he decided. Not a problem, he had all the
time in the world. And if he hadn't found it by the time the bells
rang, he would just ask one of the students for help.
                                *
     "Hey, hello?" Pike called twenty minutes later, as he walked
into the library. "Anybody here?"
     The librarian-- at least, he assumed the older man was a
librarian-- walked out from a back office, peering at Pike through
a pair of thick glasses. "Yes?" he asked.
     "Hey," Pike said, leaning up against a bookshelf. "I was
wondering...I'm looking for a book."
     "I see," the man said. "And...you're a student here?"
     "Nah," Pike said. "But a friend of mine goes here and if
you've got it I'll just ask her if she can check it out for me."
When the librarian nodded, Pike continued. "It's called the Pagamon
Codex, it's an occultish sort of thing...real hard to find. Or so
my friend tells me." He watched closely for a reaction, and was
rewarded with a look of complete and utter _shock_ on the
librarian's face-- for a moment. Then the expression was quickly
covered, replaced by a facade of calm. *Bingo,* Pike thought. *This
would be the guy.* He'd been trying to come up with a way of
determining who Buffy's Watcher was since last night, finally
deciding that if he mentioned some piece of little-known Slayer
lore, then he'd at least be able to gage whether or not whoever he
was talking to had the sligtest clue as to what was going on around
themself.
     "I-- I'm afraid we don't have a copy of that, in fact, I've
never, I've never heard of it," the librarian stammered.
     The cover was so obvious, Pike could have seen it in his
sleep. Sure, he could see where the guy wouldn't want to just blurt
out, yes, he was the Watcher of the Chosen One-- but on the other
hand, if somebody came up and obviously knew what was going on,
then what could be lost by a small amount of reserved blurting?
"Nice try, pops," Pike said. He offered a hand. "You must be the
Watcher?"
     The librarian took his hand, and let Pike shake it, but shook
his head. "No," he said. "I-- I think you have the wrong person."
     Pike shook his head, releasing the hand. "Nah," he said. He
looked the Watcher over. "I know what's up with her," he said. "The
Slayage thing. So you can drop the 'see no evil' act."
     There was a tense moment, then the librarian nodded slowly.
"I...see. And, if I were to give your claim substance, how would
you know about this, exactly?"
     "Because," Pike said, "I'm friends with her. From Merrick's
time." He grinned. "Back in the day."
     Another moment of silence. "I see." The two stood there for a
moment, and Pike was about to open his mouth to say more when the
phone in the Watcher's office rang. "Excuse me," the older man
said. "Stay right here, please, I won't take more than a minute."
     Pike nodded. "Sure, whatever," he said, settling back in next
to the bookcase. "Take your time."
                                *
     Giles moved into the office, pondering the appearance of
this...young man. Who said he knew Buffy from when Merrick had been
her Watcher. He swallowed. He always hated thinking about the time
before he had been assigned to Buffy, and he did his best, usually,
to try and not think about it. He was perfectly capable of doing
his duty without concentrating on that portion of the past, most of
the time. Though every so often, he had read the previous Watcher's
diaries, and wondered at the differences between the Buffy who had
slain Lothos, the oldest known vampire, and the one who was now
constantly battling everything he told her. The supreme sort of
teenage rebelliousness, he supposed.
     He picked up the telephone on the third ring, putting it to
his ear. "Sunnydale High School library, Mr. Giles speaking. May I
help you?"
     "Rupert," came an English-accented voice through the line.
     Giles felt the blood drain from his face when the person spoke
his name. The Coordinator of the Watcher Network-- he'd have
recognized that voice anywhere. Any Watcher would. "Yes, Sir?" he
asked, doing his best to make certain his voice didn't shake.
     "We've come to a descision," the Coordinator said. His voice
was, as always, quiet and even.
     "Yes?" Giles asked, though he knew that descisions made by the
Coordinator and delivered in person, so to speak, were not usually
the sort that were well-received by those they were intended for.
     "Your Slayer is going to have to die," the voice said, a
little softer.
     "_What_?!" Giles exclaimed, horrified. "What are you-- What on
earth is going on?!"
     There was a silence on the other end of the line, for a few
long seconds, before the Coordinator spoke again. "After the
incident with Mr. Zebuto's Slayer, we have realized there is a fair
chance that we can create enough Slayers to effectively battle the
darkness," he said in the same low voice he had used the last time
they'd spoken, when he'd told Giles he was being assigned to Buffy.
Since then, any communication between the two had been through "the
proper channels" in the Network, and Giles had to admit he had
enjoyed the feeling of distance. He wasn't exactly fond of the
Coordinator. "Neutralizing and then reviving your Slayer is the
easiest and most direct approach."
     Giles drew the phone away from his ear for a moment, just
staring at it in shock before bringing it back. "Sir," he said
quietly, "might I ask why you have decided to play this disgusting
excuse for an April Fool's trick in the middle of January?"
     There was a moment's silence, then the Coordinator spoke
again, and his voice had turned to iron. "This is not a joke,
Rupert," he said. "You've sworn to do all in your power to protect
and assist the Slayer in her quest against the Evil. This will ease
her burden. Tell her to prepare. That will be all."
     Before he had a chance to speak again, Giles found himself
holding a dead line in his hand. He swallowed, trying to regain
some sort of equilibrium and determine what on Earth had posessed
the Coordinator and the Network, alike.
     He glanced up, realizing he still had that peculiar visitor
standing out against the bookshelves. If he truly was a friend of
Buffy's, and he had known her when she had first been Called...his
sudden appearance here had to have more to do with events than if
it were a mere coincidence. Giles shivered, his blood running cold.
He would have to do all in his power to keep the young man from
Buffy, in that case.
     "Yes," he said, as he walked out of his office and the young
man came off the shelf to stand in the middle of the room. "Miss
Summers, eh, Buffy, is not in school today. She had other matters
to take care of. Might I have your name, and I'll let her know that
you came by?"
     The young man shrugged, then nodded. "Sure," he said. "Name's
Pike. I'll drop in again, tomorrow." Then he turned and left the
library. Giles watched him go, shaking his head a little and
wondering what on Earth he was going to tell Buffy.
     The more he thought, the more he began to wonder if the boy's
story had been true at all. If he was really an assassin sent by
the Network, then it was certainly possible that they had provided
him with the information he would need to get close to her, and
kill her. But what had the Coordinator meant when he had said she
would be brought back? He couldn't mean they would put her body
through the trauma of being killed, then returned to life, could
he? Because what if it didn't work?
     Giles sighed as the bell rang, knowing Buffy would be in
within a few minutes, for a brief check-in, and he would have to
have something to tell her.
     He just wished he knew what it would be.

~

Comments to [e-mail], please!



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "Jennifer M." <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: "Iris" Part 1
Date: 26 Jun 1998 10:55:02 PDT

TITLE: "Iris"
AUTHOR: Jennifer M. ([e-mail])
SUMMARY: Major Angel/Buffy angst... Angel and Buffy
are thinking back on their times together, and know
that a future is impossible.
RATING: PG
TIME PERIOD: After Becoming 2, Angel has returned from Hell,
with his soul.
THANK YOU: Andrea Newbery, you were inspiring.  Also thank
you to the Goo Goo Dolls, who gave me this idea.  Thank
you Joss for the great series, and for writing terrific
dialogue, some of which I used for this piece.
FEEDBACK: Yes, please.
DISTRIBUTION: Just ask.
DISCLAIMER: I own nothing.  Seriously, nothing.  I have
only my ideas, so please take that into consideration.
"Iris" is property of the Goo Goo Dolls (absolutely my
favorite song!), and Characters from "Buffy the Vampire
Slayer" belong to Joss Whedon, et. al.
NOTES: This is part one of a two parter.
<> indicates thoughts and memories.
Single quote marks indicate speaking to oneself.

Iris
Part 1


"Angel"

Angel sat in his apartment, pondering his many mistakes over the
years.  Close to 250 to be exact, he thought.  His biggest mistake,
his brightest love, was Buffy.  And, she was a Vampire Slayer.
He was enraptured from the first time he saw her.

<i>And I'd give up forever to touch you
'Cause I know that you feel me somehow
You're the closest to heaven that I'll ever be
And I don't want to go home right now.</i>

The very first time he saw her, she sat on the steps of her school,
her long blond hair was blowing as, and her innocence was stripped
from her with one short exchange.

<"I don't have a destiny.  I'm destiny-free, really," she told the
stranger.>

The confusion on her face had made Angel want to rush to her, and
explain everything. From the first, he had wanted nothing more than
to hold her and protect her from the bad things that go bump in the
night.

<"Yes, you have. You are the chosen one. You alone can stop them."
Her former watcher told her.

"Who?"

"The vampires.">

Angel remembered the time when he first approached her in
Sunnydale.  He was determined to help the frail-looking girl without
becoming involved in her life.  He just had to do something.
He had to be sure she was prepared and ready for The Harvest.
He knew that if anything were to happen to her, his life would
be over.

She had hidden above him when he followed her down that alley.
She swung down and knocked him off of his feet.  She was
much more athletic than even he had given her credit for.
She was so beautiful in her anger at her situation.  Buffy
didn't want the official title as "The Slayer."  It was
unfair to her.  It was unfair to him, he thought.  She
deserved better than a danger-filled life.  A life that
included vampires and, of course, saving the world every
few months or so.

The love he felt for this girl was overwhelming.  It
consumed him.  And, during the time when he was "cryptic
guy" he knew he was being drawn toward her.  He knew that
their lives were going to be very hard to separate.  And,
he tried.  Oh, how he tried to avoid becoming so close to her.

<i>And all I can taste is this moment
And all I can breathe is your life
And sooner or later it's over
I just don't want to miss you tonight</i>

Angel thought of the first time they shared a kiss...
the sweetness of her lips in her kitchen.  Her mother
had no idea he was there, and Buffy had no idea he was
her mortal enemy.  He tried to hide his demon from her.
He tried to keep her from finding out.  But, she did.
And, all it took was her mouth on his for him to lose control.

His evil demon took over his features, and she screamed.
She pushed him away from her, and he ran.  He ran like a
child.  And, he should never, ever have forgotten that.
Because he forgot that he could lose control of the demon
when he was with her, he lost her forever.

Then, he remembered when she kissed him in the ice-skating
rink.  She hadn't noticed or cared about his features... his
demonic features.  She was concerned for him.  The thought of
that just amazed him beyond belief.  That anyone would, or
could care for him... he hadn't known it was possible for
centuries.  And, here was this small, beautiful girl who
loved him.  Vampire or not.

<i>And I don't want the world to see me
æCause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am</i>

She loved him. A vampire.  The amazing possibility of it was
shocking to him, even now. He sat on his bed, and mourned
the loss of the love of his life.  He remembered in aching
detail, every feature on her lovely face.  "Oh Buffy."  He
whispered.  He pulled his pillow to his chest and hugged it
tightly.  He remembered when he was a child and he used to
et scared at night, he did the same thing.  The memory brought
a sad smile to his face.

God, how he missed her.  He missed her smile.  He missed
her sarcastic sense of humor.  He missed her love.  He
would give anything to have her back. He would give his
life to hold her just once more... but that was impossible.
She told him that last night.  He could never, ever see her
again, if he expected her to live her life.  Their life
together was over, and there was nothing he could do to
get it back.  Nothing.  She had said, harshly, to leave
her alone.  To never come to her, to never visit her, to
never see her.  Ever again.  And, he would not.  He would
do anything she asked him, and starting tonight, he would
never again be a presence in her life.

<i>And you can't fight the tears that ain't coming
Or the moment of truth in your lies
When everything feels like the movies
Yeah, you bleed just to know you're alive</i>

And, so, he was leaving Sunnydale for ever.  He would
never return to the place where he had first experienced
love.  He would never again see her. This young girl who
so cared for him once.  That part of his life was over.
But, he had his memories.  And, he would never forget
her. He would live his life protecting people from the
demons she so hated.  The demons she fought with her
precious life each and every night with such skill and
force.  He would use what she taught him about living
to kill the dead.

<i>And I don't want the world to see me
'Cause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am
I just want you to know who I am
I just want you to know who I am</i>

______________________________________________________
Get Your Private, Free Email at http://www.hotmail.com



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: "Fallen From Grace" (3/11)
Date: 26 Jun 1998 14:45:50 EDT

Notes: Takes place the January or so of Angel's change. E-mail me for missing
pieces. :)
Disclaimers: Blake and the Coordinator, etc, are mine. The rest would appear
to belong to High God Joss.
Distribution: Not without my permission, please.
Feedback: YES! To [e-mail], please, whether it be good or bad or
something in-between.

And now, on to the show!

~

                              Three

     "Hey, Buffy."
     Buffy glanced over her shoulder, offering a smile as Xander
walked up behind her. "Hey," she replied, weaving her way through
the crowd on her way to the library. "S'up?"
     The other teen grinned at her and shook his head. "New topic:
who was the creep from last night, and why wouldn't you talk about
him when you got back?"
     "He's not a creep," Buffy said, her tone a bit defensive.
"He's an old friend."
     "Sure," Xander said indulgently, before giving her a look that
let her know just how little he believed what she was saying. "Now
the truth. The guy walks in, kisses you like there's no tomorrow,
so what's the deal?"
     Turning to look at the other teen, Buffy sighed and stopped
walking. Xander did the same, waiting expectantly. "He's a
_friend_," Buffy said, stressing the word. She sighed. "It's
complicated."
     "So wait a sec." Xander held up a finger, then pointed at his
chest. "If I'm your friend, am I allowed to kiss you like that?" He
smiled slightly.
     She grinned, picking up her walk again. "You wish," she
replied as Xander scrambled to catch up, "but I'd knock you flat."
     "So," he said, "that would make him _more_ than a friend,
wouldn't it?"
     "I guess," she replied. "He's more of the ex-boyfriend sort of
old friend."
     "Ah-_hah_." A pause. "How ex?"
     "Very ex."
     "Good."
     Buffy grinned slightly, then shook her head. "You can
interrogate him later, yourself," she said. "He's going to check in
with me some time today..." She trailed off as they entered the
library, and she saw the expression on Giles' face. Her Watcher
wasn't one prone to excessive over-reactions, so when she saw the
way he was poring over the Codex, and the troubled look in his
eyes, she immediately put aside the light mood she'd had while
speaking with Xander. For his part, the other teen fell silent.
     "Something up, Giles?" she asked.
     "Yes," Giles said quietly. Then he glanced up at her. "We have
something of a problem."
     "That's generally the case when something's up," Xander said.
     "I was called by the Network Coordinator, earlier this
morning," Giles said. "And since then, I've spoken with Mr. Zebuto-
- Kendra's Watcher, if you recall-- and he recieved a similar
message."
     "Coordinator? What?" Buffy shook her head. "Start over,
Giles," she said. "'Cause you're not making any sense right now."
     Giles shook his head and moved back to the Codex.
     Buffy followed him with a sigh. "Giles," she said quietly,
"what's going on?"
     "The Coordinator," Giles said, straightening a bit, "is the
one who...runs the Watcher Network."
     "Your boss?" Xander piped up.
     "Effectively speaking."
     "Which is the only way we ever speak around here," Xander
said. He forced his grin away when neither Giles nor Buffy returned
it, and sighed. "So, the big Coordinator Guy called you up. Wow,
cool, let's kiss his feet and move on. Next topic?" He shook his
head at the expressions the words earned him. "Or not."
     With a sigh, Giles looked back at Buffy. "At any rate," he
said, "I was...given some rather disturbing news."
     "Okay," Buffy said. "Not like we ever get anything else, but
what was it?"
     "The Network," Giles began. "...is an extremely...how to put
this...farsighted organization. Thus the collections of prophecies
and such, to allow Watchers and Slayers to make the best descisions
possible when they need to determine what courses of action to
take." He swallowed, and Buffy began to get the distinct feeling
that something seriously off-the-wall was going on. "At any rate,"
Giles said, "they have been made aware of the case with yourself
and Kendra. And they have a rather unique perspective on the entire
situation."
     "And that would be?"
     "That because your death created a new Slayer, if you die
again, fate may decide to give a repeat performance."
     Buffy frowned. "Excuse me?"
     "In short," Giles said haltingly, "they feel that it might be
best for the fate of humanity as well as for the crusade against
the vampires and evil in general, if there were more than just two
Slayers."
     "Hold _on_, whoa, back up," Xander broke in. "Now, I realize
I'm an idiot as far as these big world-saving things go, but are
you saying what I think you're saying?"
     "I'm saying that they are very possibly going to set things up
so as to...permit a direct attack on Buffy's life."
     The two teens stared at him in shocked silence. "_What_?!"
Buffy finally screeched.
     "They-- I was told--" Giles shook his head. "They will, uh,
how to say this without giving you the wrong, the wrong
impression..."
     "Wrong _impression_?!" Buffy yelled. "What the hell kind of
impression would be _right_?!" She shook her head. "I've been
fighting their fight now for two _years_ and now they want to
_kill_ me?!"
     Giles took a breath and opened his mouth to speak. "Buffy--"
     "Don't _Buffy_ me!" she yelled. "I give up two years and this
is those assholes are gonna repay me?!" Her eyes narrowed. "Wait a
sec," she said. "Why did you even tell me?" Then, derisively, "You
didn't honestly think I'd just go _along_ with it, did you?"
     "Whoa," Xander said. "Buff, that's kind of harsh, don't you--"
     "Shut up, Xander," Buffy snapped, glaring at Giles. "Come on,"
she directed her Watcher. "Did you think I was gonna just sit quiet
and let somebody kill me because they _say_ they'll bring me back?"
     "Of course not," Giles replied, shaking his head. "Buffy,
please...calm down."
     "I don't think so," she said.
     "Buffy," Giles said, a little more force in his voice, "get a
hold of yourself." The Slayer glared at him defiantly, and he took
her by the shoulders to hold her still. "I am not," he said, "about
to let anyone kill you, is that understood?"
     She nodded, despite the anger and resentment that was showing
through in her expression.
     "Good," Giles said. He glanced over at Xander. "Xander," he
said, "would you please leave the two of us?"
     Xander glanced from Buffy, then to the Watcher, then back.
"You gonna be okay?" he asked her.
     She glared at Giles, then nodded to Xander. "Yeah," she said.
"_I'll_ be fine."
     Giles sighed. "Mister Harris, if you please..." He nodded
toward the doorway.
     "On my way," Xander said, walking out of the room.
     "First of all," Giles said, "there was a young man named Pike
here to see you earlier. I don't want you to speak with him."
     Buffy raised an eyebrow. "Why the hell not?" she asked. "He's
a friend, if they're going to try and kill me, I need all the
friends I can get, don't I?"
     "Except that he may not be a friend any longer," Giles said
quietly. When he saw the stricken look that passed across her face,
he sighed. "Buffy," he said, "you must understand, he knows so much
about our procedure and--"
     "He read Merrick's books," Buffy interrupted.
     "There would have been none left to read within days," Giles
said quietly. "The Network clears out the belongings of dead
Watchers as soon as they recieve word of the death, to assure that
the materials won't fall into the wrong hands." He sighed. "I am
sorry, Buffy, but..."
     "So you're saying Pike's going to try to kill me?" She shook
her head. "That's insane. He knows I could beat the crap out of him
in a fight, and he's just here to catch up on old times."
     "Be that as it may," Giles said, "I don't want you speaking
with him unless there are others around you. Myself, Xander, or
Willow. Or Cordelia, I suppose." He tacked the last on, realizing
a split second later that Cordelia would most likely do more harm
than good if she were to try to defend the Slayer.
     "But isn't that overreacting?" Buffy asked. "Just because he
shows up, doesn't mean he--" She took a deep breath, and Giles
noticed that it was slightly uneven.
     He sighed. "Buffy," he said, "everything will be fine, so long
as you're careful and follow my instructions. For once."
     "Easy for you to say," she muttered. "They're not gonna try to
kill _you_."
     Giles shook his head. "Even if they did kill you," he said,
"they would do all in their power to bring you back to life. You're
a Slayer, Buffy, they're not--"
     "Not _a_ Slayer," she broke in. "_The_ Slayer. I'm supposed to
be _the_ Slayer." She swallowed hard, and it was only then that
Giles realized she was close to tears. "You don't understand this
at all, do you! This isn't something I ever wanted to do, but I've
done it best I could for two _years_ now, partly 'cause I didn't
have a choice, but also because it's something _I_ can do, nobody
else! Merrick told me that I'm the Chosen One! You did too!" She
shook her head, taking a quick breath, then continued. "Chosen
_One_! One is not _plural_! Now, not only are they trying to kill
me...but..." She sighed, falling into a brief silence. "This is
something that makes me special, Giles. And now they're going to
try to take that away." A tear spilled over onto her cheek, tracing
a path down her smooth skin, blurring the mascara slightly. "It was
one thing with Kendra. That was an accident and nobody knew it
would happen and she stays outta my way anyway. This, though..."
The Slayer took a quick breath, obviously trying to keep herself
from letting more tears go. "This just isn't _fair_."
     Giles sighed, shaking his head and drawing her into his arms,
almost surprised that she let him hold her. "I know," he murmured,
"and Buffy, you must believe me when I tell you, I would never let
them hurt you. And I'm going to fight this, best I can. I promise
you."
     Not moving or trying to pull away from him, Buffy tensed
slightly, her body shaking harder as she began to cry in earnest.
Giles held her, shaking his head and rocking her slightly, and
trying to decide what on earth he was going to be able to do about
the mess that was quick developing around them all.

~

Comments to [e-mail], please!



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Reflections 2/7
Date: 26 Jun 1998 17:02:51 EDT

Title~ Reflections 2/7
Author~Shani
Timeline~ letÆs say between Go Fish and Becoming I & II--Becomings wonÆt
happen here
Summary~ Angelus becomes Angel, but has some thinking to do before going to
Buffy...if he decides to go to Buffy at all.
Disclaimer~ The characters of Buffy the Vampire Slayer belong to Joss Whendon,
Mutant Enemy Productions, Kuzui Enterprises, Sandollar Productions, and 20th
Century Fox.  No infringement intended.  Story for entertainment purposes
only.
Feedback~ YES, YES, YES, YES!!  Please send all comments to [e-mail]


    ôIt was the strangest thing,ö Buffy said to Willow on their way to the
library.  ôI felt like some one was there, ya know, like watching me.  I
thought it was a vamp or something evil, but I couldnÆt sense any type of
demon.ö
    ôMaybe a regular old human was passing by,ö Willow suggested hopefully.
    ôWill, when has it ever been a æregular old humanÆ?ö Buffy asked her friend.
    ôAll right, you have a point, but there have been no prophecies and itÆs been
æslow slayingÆ I believe you called it...Anyway, IÆm sure it was nothing,ö
Will said, trying to ease her friendÆs mind as well as her own.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    Angel had made it to his apartment before sun rise, barely.  It looked the
same as the last time he saw it.  But it felt so empty.  The first thing he
did was put on the claddagh ring, the heart pointing towards him.  He guessed
that he would have to talk to Buffy and know that she had forgiven him before
he could even begin to forgive himself.  The only problem with that theory is
that he wasnÆt sure he could face Buffy, or how she would react.  Did she feel
guilty too?  æGodÆ he thought to himself.  æWhat if she blames herself for
Angelus coming back.Æ  He knew he would have to see her soon.  Not only for
her sake, but for his as well.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    Giles frowned.  He had read the passage five times now, and each time it was
the same.  This was bad.  He stood and turned as the library doors swung open.
    Buffy and Willow stopped their conversation as soon as they saw the look on
GilesÆ face.
    ôSpill,ö Buffy said flatly.  She knew that look.  Something was up.
    ôI-i have come upon a prophecy,ö Giles said.
    ôOk, that helps,ö Buffy replied sarcastically.
    Willow walked to the table where several books lay open.  A dusty, old book
in the center of the pile caught her attention.  She picked it up and read to
herself for a moment.
    ôI think I recognize this, well something like it,ö Willow began catching
both Giles and BuffyÆs attention.
    ôRecognize what?ö Xander said as he walked in the door, Cordelia on his arm.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    Sitting on the couch, Angel tried desperately to remember why Angelus had
been so looking forward to today.  Something was coming and he needed to know
what it was, so did Buffy.





-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "Jennifer M." <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Iris Part 2/2
Date: 26 Jun 1998 15:25:18 PDT

TITLE: "Iris"
AUTHOR: Jennifer M. ([e-mail])
SUMMARY: Major Angel/Buffy angst... Angel and Buffy
are thinking back on their times together, and know
that a future together is impossible.
RATING: PG
TIME PERIOD: After Becoming 2, Angel has returned
from Hell, with his soul.
THANK YOU: Andrea Newbery, you were inspiring.  Also
thank you to the Goo Goo Dolls, who gave me this idea.
Thank you Joss Whedon for the great series, and for writing
terrific dialogue, some of which I used for this piece.
FEEDBACK: Yes, please.
DISTRIBUTION: Just ask.
DISCLAIMER: I own nothing.  Seriously, nothing.  I have
only my ideas, so please take that into consideration.
"Iris" is property of the Goo Goo Dolls (absolutely my
favorite song!), and Characters from "Buffy the Vampire
Slayer" belong to Joss Whedon, et. al.
NOTES: This is part two of a two parter.
<> indicates thoughts and memories.
Single quote marks indicate speaking to oneself.

Iris
Part 2

"Buffy"

Buffy lay on her bed, following the aftermath of her
final battle with Angel.  She had physically fought
with Angelus so many times in the recent past, but
this "fight" was the hardest.  The tears fell from
her eyes as she thought of all the times Angel was
there when she needed him.  She tried to think of all
of the times he wasn't. But she couldn't.  She was
unable to remember the horrible things that had happened
after she loved him so fully.  So completely.  After
she gave him her soul.  She gave up so much for him,
and when it happened, when he changed because of
her love, she did not even know.

She knew, however, that her life was pretty much over.
Without Angel in it, she was as good as dead.  But, it
didn't matter. Nothing mattered.  And, nothing would
ever matter again.  There was no possible way for their
love to survive.  She's a human.  A Vampire-Slaying
Human, sure, but, still a human.  And, Angel.  Well,
he's a Vampire.  He is everything she hates.  But, she
doesn't hate him.  What she feels for him does not even
come close to hatred.  In fact, it is the exact opposite.

æHe is the exact definition of what I want in my life.
I can't think of a reason to live without him.'

~~~And I'd give up forever to touch you
'Cause I know that you feel me somehow
You're the closest to heaven that I'll ever be
And I don't want to go home right now.~~~

She continued to think of the times he was there,
offering comfort.  He would pull her into his strong
arms, and shield her against the world.  They fought
side by side, teaching and learning from one another
over the months.  She felt they had finally come to a
place where they trusted each other completely. Buffy
knew she would never feel the same for anyone else, ever.
He was her first and only true love.  Nothing anyone
could say would ever change that.

Through all of the hard times of the past few months,
Buffy held onto the hope that her Angel would be returned
to her.  She could block out all of the things that he
had done.  She could erase all of the pain he had caused
her.  In the time before he changed back to her Angel, it
was all she could think of to get her through.  Especially
when he was at his worst.  When he was watching her.
When he was taunting her.  When he killed Jenny.  When
he tried over and over to kill her.  To kill Giles.
To kill Willow and Xander.

~~~And all I can taste is this moment
And all I can breathe is your life
And sooner or later it's over
I just don't want to miss you tonight~~~

Buffy thought she would just hide away in her room
forever.  She'd ever again see the light of day or
the darkness of night.  She had ust spent the worst
night of her life telling Angel to leave her alone. To
never, ever bother her again.  To never love her again.
And,he agreed.  But, she didn't want that.  She wanted
him in her life.  She wanted to be able to run to him.
To hide away in his apartment, held in the safety of
his arms.

<NO!  That's impossible!  There is no way we can
ever again be together.  I just can't take that
chance Angel!"

"Buffy!  It's not impossible.  We'll just be more
careful..."

"No!  It's not going to work.  It's just too hard
to see you and not be with you.  Not kiss you?
I can't do it, Angel.  I can't.  And, you shouldn't
ask me to."

"I'm sorry, Buffy..."

"You're always sorry.  But, there's nothing we can
do.  Let's just end this, and keep our happy memories.
If we have any left," she lied cruelly.

"I have nothing but good memories of you..."

"Well, that's all you have.">

She remembered the cruelty in her voice.  She remembered
the pain in his face.  The confusion. It nearly broke
her resolve to leave him forever.  And, it did break
her heart.  She remembered turning her head, so she wouldn't
have to see the pleading in his eyes.  It had taken
every ounce of strength she had to not run into his
arms, and tell him to forget it, that they would work
it out somehow.

She hid her head in her pillow, and cried like she
never had before.

~~~`And you can't fight the tears that ain't coming
Or the moment of truth in your lies
When everything feels like the movies
Yeah, you bleed just to know you're alive~~~

<OK, Buffy.  We'll do it your way.  I'll leave you
alone.  You won't have to ever see me again."
He said, resigning himself to a life alone, without
her.

"Good," she had lowered her head so he wouldn't see
the tears in her eyes...

"I'll see you, Buffy."  He waited for something,
anything from her.  He turned and walked away.

She sank into the chair. æHe didn't want me.  He
didn't fight for me,' She thought irrationally.
Depression had taken over her mind.  What she
didn't see, as he got to the door, he turned and
looked at her.  Trying to find the strength to
leave her forever.

She cried at the memory.  She cried at her loss.
She couldn't seem to stop crying.

She lifted her head from the pillow, and through
bleary eyes, she looked at her door.  She thought
she heard her mother, but didn't hear anything
else.  She dropped her head back onto her pillow.
Some time had passed, and she wasn't sure how much.
She just didn't care.  The tears never stopped.

She pulled herself off of her bed, and turned on
the radio.  "Iris" by the Goo Goo Dolls was playing.
She wrapped her arms around herself, and stared into
her mirror.  Her tears continued to fall. "Good bye
Angel.  I love you."

~~~And I don't want the world to see me
'Cause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am
I just want you to know who I am
I just want you to know who I am~~~

______________________________________________________
Get Your Private, Free Email at http://www.hotmail.com



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "Jennifer M." <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Iris Part 2/2
Date: 26 Jun 1998 15:39:20 PDT

TITLE: "Iris"
AUTHOR: Jennifer M. ([e-mail])
SUMMARY: Major Angel/Buffy angst... Angel and
Buffy are thinking back on their times together,
and know that a future is impossible.
RATING: PG
TIME PERIOD: After Becoming 2, Angel has returned
from Hell, with his soul.
THANK YOU: Andrea Newbery, you were inspiring.
Also thank you to the Goo Goo Dolls, who gave me
this idea.  Thank you Joss Whedon for the great
series, and for writing terrific dialogue, some
of which I used for this piece.
FEEDBACK: Yes, please.
DISTRIBUTION: Just ask.
DISCLAIMER: I own nothing.  Seriously, nothing.
I have only my ideas, so please take that into
consideration.  "Iris" is property of the Goo Goo
Dolls (absolutely my favorite song!), and Characters
from "Buffy the Vampire Slayer" belong to Joss
Whedon, et. al.
NOTES: This is the second part of a two parter.
<> indicates thoughts and memories.
Single quote marks indicate speaking to oneself.

Iris
Part 2

"Buffy"

Buffy lay on her bed, following the aftermath of
her final battle with Angel.  She had physically
fought with Angelus so many times in the recent
past, but this "fight" was the hardest.  The tears
fell from her eyes as she thought of all the times
Angel was there when she needed him.  She tried to
think of all of the times he wasn't. But she couldn't.
She was unable to remember the horrible things that
had happened after she loved him so fully.  So completely.
After she gave him her soul.  She gave up so much for
this man, and when it happened, when he changed
because of her love, she did not even know.

She knew, however, that her life was pretty much
over.  Without Angel in it, she was as good as dead.
But, it didn't matter.  Nothing mattered.  And,
nothing would ever matter again.  There was no possible
way for their love to survive.  She's a human.  A
Vampire-Slaying Human, sure, but, still a human.
And, Angel.  Well, he's a Vampire.  He is everything
she hates.  But, she doesn't hate him.  What she feels
for him does not even come close to hatred.  In fact,
it is the exact opposite.

æHe is the exact definition of what I want in my life.
I can't think of a reason to live without him.'

~~~And I'd give up forever to touch you
'Cause I know that you feel me somehow
You're the closest to heaven that I'll ever be
And I don't want to go home right now.~~~

She continued to think of the times he was there,
offering comfort.  He would pull her into his strong
arms, and shield her against the world.  They
fought side by side, teaching and learning from
one another over the months.  She felt they had
finally come to a place where they trusted each
other completely. Buffy knew she would never feel
the same for anyone else, ever.  He was her first
and only true love.  Nothing anyone could say would
ever change that.

Through all of the hard times of the past few months,
Buffy held onto the hope that her Angel would be
returned to her.  She could block out all of the
things that he had done.  She could erase all of the
pain he had caused her.  In the time before he changed
back to Angel, it was all she could think of to get
her through.  Especially when he was at his worst.
When he was watching her.  When he was taunting her.
When he killed Jenny.  When he tried over and over
to kill her.  To kill Giles.  To kill Willow and
Xander.

~~~And all I can taste is this moment
And all I can breathe is your life
And sooner or later it's over
I just don't want to miss you tonight~~~

Buffy thought she would just hide away in her room
forever.  She'd never again see the light of day or
the darkness of night.  She had just spent the worst
night of her life telling Angel to leave her alone.
To never, ever bother her again.  To never love her
again.  And, he agreed.  But, she didn't want that.
She wanted him in her life.  She wanted to be able
to run to him.  To hide away in his apartment, held
in the safety of his arms.

<NO!  That's impossible!  There is no way we can ever
again be together.  I just can't take that chance Angel!"

"Buffy!  It's not impossible.  We'll just be more careful..."

"No!  It's not going to work.  It's just too hard
to see you and not be with you.  Not kiss you?  I
can't do it, Angel.  I can't.  And, you shouldn't
ask me to."

"I'm sorry, Buffy..."

"You're always sorry.  But, there's nothing we can
do.  Let's just end this, and keep our happy memories.
If we have any left," she lied cruelly.

"I have nothing but good memories of you..."

"Well, that's all you have.">

She remembered the cruelty in her voice.  She remembered
the pain in his face.  It nearly broke her resolve
to leave him forever.  And, it did break her heart.
She remembered turning her head, so she wouldn't
have to see the pleading in his eyes.  The confusion.
It had taken every ounce of strength she had to not run
into his arms, and tell him to forget it, that
they would work it out somehow.

She hid her head in her pillow, and cried like she
never had before.

~~~And you can't fight the tears that ain't coming
Or the moment of truth in your lies
When everything feels like the movies
Yeah, you bleed just to know you're alive~~~

<Ok, Buffy.  We'll do it your way.  I'll leave you
alone.  You won't have to ever see me again."  He
said, resigning himself to a life alone, without her.

"Good," she had lowered her head so he wouldn't
see the tears in her eyes...

"I'll see you, Buffy."  He waited for something,
anything from her.  He turned and walked away.

She sank into the chair. æHe didn't want me.  He
didn't fight for me,' She thought irrationally.
Depression had taken over her mind. What she
didn't see, as he got to the door, he turned and
looked at her.  Trying to find the strength to
leave her forever.

She cried at the memory.  She cried at her loss.
She couldn't seem to stop crying.

She lifted her head from the pillow, and through
bleary eyes, she looked at her door.  She thought
she heard her mother, but didn't hear anything else.
She dropped her head back onto her pillow.  Some time
had passed, and she wasn't sure how much.  She just
didn't care.  The tears never stopped.

She pulled herself off of her bed, and turned on
the radio.  "Iris" by the Goo Goo Dolls was playing.
She wrapped her arms around herself, and stared
into her mirror.  Her tears continued to fall.
"Good bye Angel.  I love you."

~~~And I don't want the world to see me
'Cause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am
I just want you to know who I am
I just want you to know who I am~~~

______________________________________________________
Get Your Private, Free Email at http://www.hotmail.com



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: _-Sun-_ <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Charlotte Sometimes (Part 39)
Date: 26 Jun 1998 18:27:43 -0700

Characters are never mine. That's why I forget to say it now and
then... because we all know that they'll never be mine...
    Also - there's a ton 'o violence to come.
    Small children, pets, and the sensitive should delete now ;)
    Also, I've been told that this chapter is depressing. Soooo, you've
been warned ;)

Charlotte Sometimes (Part 39)


    Drusilla stared numbly outside of the carriage, a couple of the sisters
bowed their heads and prayed, but not Drusilla. Drusilla stared in
shock.
    There was blood everywhere, along the house, in the tree's. She
couldn't fathom   this kind of hideous violence, the cruel killings that
had happened here. She couldn't believe what her eyes saw, that anyone,
*anything* could create this revolting scene.
But there was one person she knew. One demon hateful enough to hurt so
many...

    Drusilla's shaking fingers found the carriage knob, franticly hitting
it, pushing it  up then down. Trying insanely to get the jammed door to
open.
    The two sisters nearer to her began to pull at her, telling her that
they must leave this unholy site, that Satan himself had plagued her
house.
    But Drusilla refused them, scratching the hands that came between her
and the door until it finally gave way. Screaming out for her sister,
she fell onto the ground, tumbling then standing.
Lydia had been here! While this was all going on! While Angelus had been
here so had her sister!
What if... He had.. Could he?
    The question seemed absurd, as she pushed past her pain the best she
could to stagger towards the doors.

    She gasped, and tumbled before falling flat on her face.
Turning around she watched the three sisters argue about going after
her, all their heads bowed away from the ghastly scene. And bowed away
from Drusilla...

Moaning, she tried to scramble into the house without seeing red, and
she managed to get to her feet, running and limping - screaming out when
her body came to  a dead halt to see the figure of her one time nanny on
the ground, very obviously dead.

Thus distressed she somehow managed to get inside her house, not
bothering to slam the door shut, far to stilled to manage the simple
task. It was the house - completely differed from the site on the
outside. It was quite another site. Looking the same as before, nothing
moved, nothing out of place. Just quiet.
Only half aware that she was now wearing new clothes, a new long black
dress, obviously from one of the nuns - She panted, completely out of
breath, running up the stairs. Scanning up about seven steps then
falling down. She screamed again for her sister, praying to god that
Angelus hadn't gotten her.

    Drusilla finally reached her sisters room - but to no avail, Lydia
wasn't in the house. She screamed out for mercy, for her sister. But it
was useless.
    She fell down apon the floor, closing her eyes, and began to pray.
    A prayer formed apon her lips. Not for her sister, or for herself. Not
for the many people laying dead outside her house either...

"Dear Father," She whispered in the still room, "I know he is not of
your flock, but he still needs your guidance." Opening timid eyes to
gaze in the porcelain face of her doll, and Lydia's Miss Edith.
             Drusilla picked up the doll, rolling it to a sitting
position "He is lost Father, terribly lost."
The glass eyes sent a shiver down her spine. They stared at her, in her
eyes towards her soul. What did the doll know that she didn't? Was she
here when Angelus had killed her parents? Her family? The servants?
 "But -- I love this man father!" She screamed as she threw the doll
across the room, wishing it would break and shatter, that maybe she
could shatter with it. "And his being lost is losing me." She hissed,
feeling pure vengeance for this trick of the fates."
 "Oh god," She cried standing up only to fall unto the bed, burring
herself in the covers to hide herself "Please show him the way to your
divine light For if he is lost, then so am I."


--
_-SuN-_

SD - Http://home.earthlink.net/~kbleyle/SD/index.html
K  - http://home.earthlink.net/~kbleyle/kinky/

    Daylight licked me into shape, I must have been asleep for
days. And moving lips to breathe her name, I opened up my eyes
And found myself alone alone. Alone above a raging sea
That stole the only girl I loved, And drowned her deep inside
of me (The Cure)

_ - _Spikette _ Dru's Dolly - Mercenary_ - _
  _ - _ Head Dominatrix in the Evil _ - _
_ - _   Plan For World Domination, _ - _
  _ - _ With Chains and Stuff _ - _



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Lost In The Crowd (1/1)
Date: 26 Jun 1998 20:27:34 EDT

Title: Lost In The Crowd (1/1)
Author: Nastassia
Email Addy: [e-mail]
Rating: PG
Spoiler: Big spoilers for Passion
Feedback: Please please please!
Distribution: Maybe if you ask nicely.
Disclaimer: Giles, Jenny, and the rest of the Slayerettes belong to Joss. The
song "Anybody Seen My Baby" belongs to the Rolling Stones. (Also if anyone
doesn't have the album and wants me to send them a wav of the song just ask.)
I'll give them back once I'm done playing.
Summary: Post-Passion Giles angst.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Lost In The Crowd (1/1)
by Nastassia
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~



        She confessed her love to me
              Then she vanished
              On the breeze
              Trying to hold on to that
              Was just impossible

Not a day passes by when I don't think of her. Not an hour when I don't wonder
what might have happened if she had been alive when I found her, not broken
and dead like she had been.

It was wrong. Jenny was so beautiful, so vibrant, and so full of life. As a
Watcher I should not have gotten emoitionally involved with anyone, but no one
really plans to fall in love.


        She was more than beautiful
              Closer to ethereal
              With a kind of
              Down to earth flavor


When I looked at Jenny I saw everything I was not. She was foreward, agressive
even, at times, and she had no problems expressing her feelings. There was
something in her eyes- mischief, perhaps, or maybe just happiness. You could
look into her soul through those dark eyes.

And what a beautiful soul it was. She never meant to hurt anyone. I know that
now, though I should have known sooner. Jenny didn't have a mean bone in her
body. She couldn't have known her silence would cost her her life.


              Close my eyes
        It's three in the afternoon
              Then I realize
              That she's really
              Gone for good


God, I can't believe she's really dead. There are times when I can almost see
her, chatting with Willow over that dreadful computer or standing in the
doorway of the library.

The last times I saw you alive, Jenny, we were making progress towards
regaining what we had lost.

**********
"I didn't know what would happen. I didn't know I was gonna fall in love with
you......Oh God, is it too late to take that back?"

"Do you want to?"

"I just want to be right by you. I don't expect more. I just want so badly to
make all this up to you."
**********

              Anybody seen my baby
              Anybody seen her around
              Love has gone
              And made me blind
              I've looked but I just can't find
            She has gotten lost
        In the crowd


Angelus cost me everything. Jenny went from alive and happy to broken and dead
in an instant. That bastard set up a cruel hoax for me, candles, flowers,
wine, everything Jenny would have done.

I keep replaying those last seconds in my mind. Those moments as I walked up
the stairs were the last that were not spent in torment. Everything crumbled
when I saw the present Angelus left in my bed.

I took my revenge in the only way I knew how. I attacked Angelus and almost
got myself killed in the process. Buffy saved my life, yet I was angry with
her. I don't even know why. Maybe I wanted to die.

Maybe part of me still does.


        I was flippin' magazines
        In that place on Mercer Street
        When I thought I spotted her


"Rupert."

That voice, is it really-

"It's me, Rupert. It's really me."

I smiled, for the first time since she died I really smiled. I looked up into
her beautiful eyes. "Jenny," I whispered, almost afraid to speak, lest she
vanish from my sight again.

"Everything's going to be okay now."


        Getting on a motor bike
        Looking rather lady like
        Didn't she just give me a wave?


I reached out to touch her. As my fingers grazed her lips, she breathed, "I
love you, Rupert."

"I love you, Jenny."

I awoke on the couch and felt tears appear in my eyes as I realized it had
been a dream. A wonderful terrible dream.


        Salty tears
        It's three in the afternoon
        Has she disappeared
        Is she really gone for good

Desperate to repress my emotions I went to the library. It was empty. Of
course it was empty. Who in their right mind would be alone in a library on a
Friday night. I could just picture Xander saying, 'You need a life, G-Man.'

Cool air from the open window blew a few papers onto the floor. I glanced at
the windows, searching for the one Buffy had left open.

All the windows were closed.

"Rupert."

"No," I gasped, "You're not real. I can't- I can't handle this."

"Forgive me."

"I do, Jenny." I was sobbing outright, but I didn't care anymore. "I'm sorry
too," I stammered, "If I had been there I- I- I could have protected you!"

"No more guilt," the disembodied voice ordered, "That won't change it." I felt
a cool touch on my wrist, but saw nothing. "No more tears." Cool lips touched
mine. "No more pain." I felt her fingers touch my face for a last time.
"Goodbye Rupert."

"I love you."


        Anybody seen my baby
        Anybody seen her around
        If I just close my eyes
        I reach out
        And touch the prize
        Anybody seen her around


My hands held only empty air. I wondered absently how I would go on without
her. "I wish," I began, "We had gotten the chance to be together." I briefly
thought how ridiculous I must look at that moment, talking to myself in the
school library, but quickly banished the thought. "The worst was never getting
the chance to say goodbye. You gave me that chance back, Jenny."

"Hey, G-Man, who ya talking to?" Xander called, as he, Willow, Cordelia,
Buffy, and Oz entered, disrupting the silence of the room.

"Nothing," I said, bending to pick up the papers that had fallen, "Just
memories."


        Lost, lost and never found
        I must have called her
        A thousand times
        Sometimes I think
        She's just in my imagination


Buffy reached under the table to retrive the last paper. "Giles?" she asked,
her voice shaking, "Where did this come from?"

Willow took the paper from Buffy's hands. "The Ritual of Restoration?" Willow
read, "Ohmygod, is this--"

"Angel's cure," I finished.

"How?"

"A gift from an old friend."


        Lost in the crowd


*End*
Send questions, comments, flames, and phone numbers of James Marsters to
[e-mail]



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: [e-mail]
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Duty
Date: 27 Jun 1998 00:16:16 -0400

Title:  Duty
Author: Northlight
email: [e-mail]
Content:  Post Becoming 2 Giles angst
Summary:  Giles thinks about Buffy
Disclaimer:  They belong to Joss Whedon

::For on his shoulders rests the job of fitting us for war
With nothing to give him the clue of what to train us for.
And if he fails it is not he that pays, but you and I-
And so he dies a little when he hears the Death Bell cry.::
-The Face Within, Queen's Own by Mercedes Lackey

    Giles dropped down into his chair, his shaking hand rubbing at the
bridge of his nose.  He let his glasses fall onto the cluttered desk
top, his hands collapsing down beside them.

    The voices outside his office had risen.  The young voices, once so
full of enthusiasm, were now marked with pain and sorrow.  They were too
young to know such pain, and Giles regretted that his abrupt departure
had piled another bit of worry onto their already full plates.

    He should go out there, assure them that he was perfectly fine.  Tell
them that his heart wasn't being pummeled mercilessly by the emotions
that he couldn't seem to keep at bay.  But he couldn't find the strength
to rise to his feet, much less lie to the only people he had left.

    Giles doubted that he'd even be able to keep his voice from cracking
and the tears that he had held back for so long from surging to his
eyes.

    He had known that being a Watcher wouldn't be easy.  He had known that
taking care of the Slayer would be a difficult task at best.  He had
known that the loss of their Slayers had driven some Watchers to
suicide.  He had known that in his head.  But that knowledge had never
truly reached his heart until now.

    And now Giles lived with the incredible, unrelenting agony of having
failed his Slayer every waking moment.  He couldn't even escape Buffy in
his dreams.

    Buffy had been a duty -- an unwanted one at that.  But he had grown to
love his Slayer -- her courage, her compassion..  But he had failed
her.  And now, she was gone.  Perhaps forever.

    She had depended on him and he had failed her.  He hadn't prepared her
well enough, he hadn't trained her for the possibility that had finally
taken her from him.  The recognition that he couldn't have known about
the consequences that would arise from Buffy's relationship with Angel
didn't even attempt to make itself heard over the loud wailing of Giles'
guilt.

    He should have been stronger for her.  He shouldn't have given into
Drusilla's mind games.  Because of his weakness, Giles had cost Buffy
her one chance at getting Angel back.

    His weakness had driven Buffy away.

    He missed her.  Buffy's absence had created a void in his very soul
greater than anything that Giles could have ever imagined.  For two
years, his life had centered around her and Giles found himself lost
without her.

    Noticing the wetness on his cheeks, Giles roughly scrubbed away his
tears.  He had failed his Slayer too many times all ready.  He would not
fail her again.  They would find Buffy, and somehow, he would make it up
to her.

~End~

http://www.geocities.com/Area51/Lair/7493/buffy.html



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: [e-mail]
Subject: BUFFYFIC: "Reunion," part 26 (I think)
Date: 27 Jun 1998 13:16:12 EDT

DISCLAIMER: The characters from *Buffy the
Vampire Slayer* IÆm borrowing are not mine.
ThatÆs why they call it borrowing. Okay, that
wasnÆt funny. IÆm running out of jokes, dammit!

SUMMARY: Is this the end? Is this the end?
Well, weÆre getting there! Buffy finds out what
the repercussions of her little adventure are.

IF YOU HAVE NO CLUE as to whatÆs going on,
and you havenÆt ever seen "Reunion" before, thatÆs
b/c I just resurrected my computer, and I havenÆt
posted in a millennium. If you would like previous
parts, just e-mail me, and IÆll be happy to send them
to you!

NOTE: My stupid unstable computer wouldnÆt
start up last night again, and thatÆs my lame excuse
for not getting this out last night. The rest will be
coming today, I promise!!

***
"Reunion," by Ingrid
Part 26 (I think): "Blinding"
***

He was coming up over the white hill now. She had to
squint to see him; the quickly-melting snow was glaring
back up at the sun, blinding her, and making her dizzy.

He was a speck of black on the horizon. She remembered
vaguely the felt of his warm black overcoat brushing her
skin as his arms and the big coat enveloped her.

But the feeling passed quickly like sunlight peeking through
clouds, and all she could think about was how one little drop
could keep it all rippling outward, forever. Even beyond where
anyone could see, after theyÆd all gone away, it would still be
spreading imperceptibly, always affecting something,
somewhere.

He was getting closer, but she just stood there anyway.
The air was cold and empty around her.

"Buffy?" He was running. She didnÆt answer at first, but
she looked up when he called her name. She didnÆt want
to know. She wanted to shut it all off now and go back
home with *her* Angel. At the same time, some glowing
shimmering crystalline reflection upon reflection  on the
line between snow and sky wouldnÆt let her release the
last of her hope. It hurt. But as much as she fought and
cried, she still had relentless hope.

"Buffy, are you okay? Where the hell have you been?"
He locked her in his arms, breathing deeply.

WeÆve been looking all over for y-"

"We?" she asked in scrutiny, trying to make sense of the
universe through his posture and the tone of his voice.

"I called Giles. I was worried, and he was so close and
allà Then he called Cordelia and Xander, and things
kinda got out of control. I was really worried. We were
all worriedà"

"WhereÆs Willow?"

He looked like sheÆd just punched him in the face.
"Buffyà"

What the hell was wrong with him? Her heart sunk. She was
gone. Any number of things could have wrenched her
daughter away from them- her worst fear realized. Or one of
them. She had so many.

Her daughter. Was that why she felt a hole somewhere
in the fabric of things? Something was distantly aching.
What could have happened-

"Buffy, are you ok-"

"Where is she?" She barely recognized the threatening sound
as her own voice.

"Buffy, why are you doing this? WhatÆs wrong?"

"Where is she?"

"SheÆs dead. She died."

"How? How did she die?"

His lip was trembling, and he bit back something threatening
to explode.

"I killed her Buffy."

There was blinding fire behind her eyes for a minute as AngelusÆ
sneer crossed her memory. She wanted to strike out at him. Then
before she could move at all, that same light illuminated
something else, and she nearly collapsed.

He didnÆt mean their Willow.

He meant Willow Rosenberg.

Their Willow didnÆt exist.

***
END, part 26 (I think)

_____________________________________________________________________
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-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: [e-mail]
Subject: BUFFYFIC: "Reunion" part 27
Date: 27 Jun 1998 18:21:10 EDT

DISCLAIMER: The characters arenÆt mine.

SUMMARY: Is *this* the end? No! IÆm sorry!!
Ok, anyway, Buffy and Angel are on the way
home, and she finds out whatÆs become of the
rest of the gang in this universe, but everything
is not what it seems.
IF YOU havenÆt ever seen "Reunion" before, thatÆs
b/c I just resurrected my computer, and I havenÆt
posted in years. If you would like previous
parts, just e-mail me, and IÆll be happy to send them
to you (That is if I can still start my computer up)!

AS MY COMPUTER continues to crash, IÆm
becoming more and more disgruntled. If I suddenly
disappear from the list for a year or two, youÆll know
why!

***
"Reunion" by Ingrid
Part 27: "Reality"
***

She remembered looking out the window on the
plane as the white hills slowly gave way to green,
and then the crowded airport terminals, and his
hands guiding her in the right direction. It was almost
as if she couldnÆt process the world presented to
her.

How was she to mourn for someone who never
existed?

She thought of the two of them together; those same
big hands that were guiding her now cradling the child.
But he had no idea what was lost.

She watched the signs on the road now. It was late,
and it reminded her of going home after a vacation.
That tired, deflated feeling. It was over, and now the
unpacking remained to be done.

"Now Entering Sunnydale," she read, and suddenly she
sat up in her chair and looked at Angel. "Sunnydale?"

"Yeah, where we live. Buffy, are you okay? I donÆt
understand what happened to you-"

"You said Giles was close before. Where does he live?"

"He lives where heÆs lived ever since weÆve known him."

"And Xander and Cordelia?"

"Buffy, theyÆre down the block. Come on, talk to me.
WhatÆs the matter?"

"And you talk to Giles. His leg didnÆt get smashed.
OhmyGodhislegdidnÆtgetsmashed. And thatÆs why.
But what about Corin?"

"Corin? What are you talking about?"

"The slayer, Angel. Where is she?"

"The new slayer? You said they said she was in German-"

"And CordyÆs not the watcher, but itÆs supposed to be
destiny, so how could that be? How could it happen like
that? How could they change it? How could they let this
happen? Spike killed my baby!" She was crying now,
finally grieving.

She felt the car still as he pulled over and pulled her into
his arms.

"YouÆve got to tell me whatÆs wrong, Buffy."

"WhatÆs wrong?" She broke away fiercely, tears running
freely down her face. She looked at the sky, black and
starless, "HOW COULD YOU?" she screamed, but she
couldnÆt hear it. The sky had turned gold and it was all
gone.

***
END, 27
Hmmà I wrote this while listening to RadioheadÆs "Exit Music
(For a Film)" û I just got the CD, "OK Computer" b/c of a friendÆs
recommendation. I also recommend. =)

_____________________________________________________________________
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Get completely free e-mail from Juno at http://www.juno.com
Or call Juno at (800) 654-JUNO [654-5866]



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Reflections 3/7
Date: 27 Jun 1998 20:13:10 EDT



Title~ Reflections 3/7
Author~Shani
Timeline~ letÆs say between Go Fish and Becoming I & II--Becomings will not
happen here
Summary~ Angelus becomes Angel, but has some thinking to do before going to
Buffy...if he decides to go to Buffy at all.
Disclaimer~ The characters of Buffy the Vampire Slayer belong to Joss Whendon,
Mutant Enemy Productions, Kuzui Enterprises, Sandollar Productions, and 20th
Century Fox.  No infringement intended.  Story for entertainment purposes
only.
Feedback~ YES, YES, YES, YES!!  Please send all comments to [e-mail]


    ôIt says æ...and he shall walk under the infuence and direction of evil.  A
man of a stone heart and a mind of clay.  Written on his left hand a word of
truth, love, and death.  This the Slayer will fight.  On the four-hundredth
day following the Harvest, the Slayer shall fall to this creature of stone.Æ
I recognize this from an old Jewish myth.  A man of clay and stone is brought
to life by writting the hebrew letters aleph, mem, and tuff.  I think they
spell the word æemetÆ...it means truth.ö  Willow explained.
    ôYes, yes very good.  Umm, do you know how to stop it?ö  Giles asked, his
hopes rising.
    ôYou have to erase to letter aleph from the GolamÆs hand.  Th-thatÆs what I
think itÆs called.  A golam.  Anyway, by taking off the aleph, youÆre left
with the word æmetÆ meaning death.ö  Willow finished.
    ôSo...I have to fight a moving statue and the only way to ækillÆ it is to
erase some letter thing off itÆs hand?  But...it says IÆll die anyway...ö
BuffyÆs voice trailed off.
    ôWe donÆt know that you die,ö  Xander said, refusing to believe that Buffy
would die anytime soon.  ôIt says you fall.  Maybe you just bruise your arm or
something.ö
    ôRight, I bruise my arm.  So, what do we do?ö  Buffy said, turning to her
Watcher.
    ôIÆm afraid there is not much we can do.  Why donÆt you go home.  Maybe you
can catch up on sleep or God forbid your homework,ö  Giles suggested.
    ôSleep it is,ö  the Slayer said as she walked out of the room.  She stopped.
    ôGiles, when is the æfour-hundredth day following the harvestÆ?ö she asked,
hoping that they had some time.
    ôTomorrow night.ö  the Watcher replied softly, unable to make eye contact
with Buffy.  As difficult as she could be, she was a good slayer, and a good
friend.
    He finally managed to look up, only to see Willow, Xander and Cordelia
staring at the swinging library doors.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    Angel began to pace.  As he walked past a set of shelves with glass doors, he
caught a glimps of his reflection.  Startled, he walked to it and stared at
his image.  It was beginning to make a strange sort of sense now.  The dream
in the field where he was watching himself in the mirror, the strange
feelings, Buffy not being able to sense the demon last night in the grave
yard, the hunger without wanting blood...he was human.  But, how could that
be?  He took two stakes that he had in a drawer, from when he helped Buffy
hunt--if you considered making out in a graveyard hunting.  He put the stakes
together, forming a cross.  Nothing happened.  He didnÆt feel any pain holding
the wooden cross.
    Taking a deep breath, he opened his front door.  It was time to see Buffy.
If he wasnÆt human he would die, but if he was...



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: "Fallen From Grace" (4/11)
Date: 27 Jun 1998 20:49:42 EDT

Notes: Takes place the January or so of Angel's change. E-mail me for missing
pieces. :)
Disclaimers: Blake and the Coordinator, etc, are mine. The rest would appear
to belong to High God Joss.
Distribution: Not without my permission, please.
Feedback: YES! To [e-mail], please, whether it be good or bad or
something in-between.

And now, on to the show!

~

                              Four

     Pike had lied to her. She had trusted him, and he'd lied to
her. The thoughts had been repeating themselves in her mind since
Giles had told Buffy what was going on, that the Network was going
to try to kill her. There was a hole inside her that had been gone,
or at least hidden, for close to two years. Pike's return had
ripped it wide open, and now that she knew he hadn't been truthful
with her, it was as if someone had splashed acid around the edges
and left her to be eaten away.
     She knew she hadn't said a word all night, and she hadn't been
much better the rest of the day, either. But now that they-- Buffy
and Xander, because Cordelia was grounded for getting suspended
from Pep Club, and Willow had to study-- were back at the Bronze,
she was beginning to wish she'd stayed home as well. Xander was a
wonderful friend, and lovely company, but he talked too much, and
she was in the mood for silence.
     That, and she was dreading the inevitable moment when Pike
would show up. Because somehow, she knew he would.
     "He just came in," Xander said quietly, nodding toward the
door.
     Buffy didn't glance over her shoulder. She had positioned
herself on this side of the table deliberately so that she wouldn't
have to see him. Instead, she was going to sit and carry on inane
conversation with Xander. Talk about stupid things. Or maybe dance.
"You want to dance?" she said suddenly.
     Xander raised an eyebrow, then shook his head. "Not really,"
he said, "not after last time."
     Buffy felt a blush creeping into her cheeks, remembering how
horribly she'd behaved toward him when she'd returned from LA last
September. She nodded. "Point taken," she said. "What if we just
went out on the dance floor and--"
     "Buff, you blew me off earlier-- if you weren't in school,
what're you doing out now?"
     She took a sharp breath, then sighed, casting a desperately
helpless look at Xander as she turned and shot a glare at Pike.
"Trying to stay away from certain people," she snapped.
     He took a step back at the force of her voice, and swallowed.
"Whoa," he said, his tone getting quieter. "Hold up. Did I do
something wrong? Like deign to speak to you?" He shook his head.
"You know, I thought you'd changed, but it's starting to look more
and more like you stayed the same and the clubs you hang out in
just got trashier."
     "Hey," Xander said, speaking up from across the table. "You
want to watch the tone?" He glanced at Buffy, putting on a tough-
guy look. "You want me to get rid of him?" he asked.
     "No need," said a new, fourth voice. All three of the arguing
teens turned toward the voice's owner, and Buffy felt her breath
catch in her throat.
     "Angel," she whispered, her gaze hardening.
     He shot her a sarcastic grin. "Hey there, lover," he said.
     Buffy felt her breath quicken, and she saw Xander take a step
back from the corner of her eye. Her mind was racing as she tried
to decide what she could do about this-- if there were anything she
could use to defend either herself or the Bronze's other patrons,
if Angelus tried to do anything to anyone. "Get lost," she snapped
at him.
     "Aw, hey, Buffy, no need to be impolite," he said, taking a
step toward her, almost menacingly. He flashed a smile toward Pike.
"Come on, man," he said. "Don't bother with this rich bitch, she's
too busy jerking you around to worry about anything you might have
to say."
     Pike was glaring at Buffy now, and she swallowed. "Pike--" she
started.
     But he cut her off. "Nah," he said, "that's okay. I think I'm
gonna take his advice and book it." He shook his head. "Wish I
could say it was good, Buff, but the fact is, aside from the first
kiss-- well, it just wasn't." He took a step back. "If you didn't
want to see me, you could have just said so when I first showed
up."
     "Pike!" she called after him, but he was already walking away.
     "Crap," she heard Xander murmur.
     Angelus was just standing there, slightly off to one side,
watching Pike walk away. "He could be tasty," he said.
     Buffy glared at him, then took a step to move past him and
follow Pike. Angelus stepped in front of her, though, grabbing her
wrist. "Not so fast, Buffy," he said, his smile turning cruel. "Who
is he?"
     "None of your business," she snapped, jerking her wrist away
from him. "Leave him the hell alone."
     "You wish," Angelus said.
     "Leave him _alone_!" she yelled, drawing stares from a few
nearby clubbers.
     "What makes you think I'd ever listen to anything you had to
say?" Angelus asked.
     Buffy glared at him, feeling Xander take a step closer to her.
"What are you doing here, anyway?"
     "Scoping out the buffet," Angelus said with a smirk. "Nice, to
be able to pick and choose around here, don't you think?" When she
didn't answer, he shrugged. "Or not. See you around, Slayer," he
tossed over his shoulder as he turned and walked away.
     Buffy took a full step to follow him when Xander put a hand on
her shoulder to stop her. "Buffy," he said, "Is it just me, or
would going after him when you're apparently in some kind of line
of fire be an extremely _bad_ idea?"
     "But Pike--"
     "Is, according to what you told me Giles said, also out to get
you." Xander shook his head.
     "But--"
     "You'd risk your neck for him anyway?" Xander shook his head
and sighed. "Look, Buffy...it's a great sentiment, really it is,
but it seems like you should be just _slightly_ more worried about
keeping yourself alive." He smiled weakly. "For now, at least."
     They looked at each other for a long few seconds, and finally
Buffy blinked with a sigh. "I guess."
     "Good!" Xander grinned, punching her arm affectionately. "Now,
okay, if you really want to dance, that'd be okay with me, I
guess."
     "No," she said quietly. "Never mind."
     Xander sighed, watching as Buffy turned and went back to the
table to continue nursing her soda.
                                *
     "She doesn't change, she just doesn't change," Pike murmured
to himself as he walked along. What had he been thinking? To her,
he was trash. A charity case. Oh, yeah, let's mess around with the
scuz a little, let him think he's maybe worth something to a girl
with class-- but when it comes down to it, no problems at all
telling him he wasn't worth shit. Rich bitch. Benny had been right
all along, Pike knew. Best friends, even if Benny was dead these
days. Really dead, not living-dead. "But man, were you ever right."
     He'd peel outta town in the morning, then. Forget trying to
get a good rate on a hotel room or anything, he'd camp out in the
van and think about the best route to Phoenix in the morning. Maybe
he'd go visit the Grand Canyon, first. This would be cool, then. Go
on a trip to the Grand Canyon, camp out there a few days...Pike
wondered if there were any vampires in the middle of the desert.
     And she'd seemed so _friendly_ the other night. Not all-over-
him friendly like she'd been when they'd had their goodbyes,
but...more let's-be-pals, you're-a-cool-guy sort of friends. Which
was totally, completely okay with him. Because she'd been that kind
of cool person the last time he'd seen her. Still getting over the
whole thing about being a bimbo for most of her young-adult life,
but hey, that was alright 'cause he'd been a loser for most of his.
     Now he went in to see her and her Watcher told him to get
lost, and she went out that night and told him the same. Then that
freaky guy he'd seen in the shadows his first night at the Bronze
had come over and practically threatened to beat him up. Too damn
creepy. No wonder this place was called a Hellmouth.
     Pike sighed, stepping up into his van, which he'd parked down
the block a ways from the dance club. Then he pulled the door shut.
     "'Ello there," came a British-toned voice from the passenger
seat.
     Pike looked up immediately, his eyes widening when he saw the
guy who'd taken the passenger seat. "Nice clothes," he said, with
a nod at the tweed suit the man was wearing. "Now get the hell out
of my car."
     "Oh, I don't think so," the man said, turning his face toward
the passenger window. "Drive, and we'll talk."
     Pike frowned. "Why should I do that?" he asked.
     The man drew a large pistol from his jacket, and aimed it
directly at Pike's head.
     "Okay, good reason," Pike said as he turned the key in the
ignition and pressed the gas pedal, shifting the car into gear and
driving away.
                                *
     "You're losing your touch," Xander said quietly, "'cause
y'know, usually you'd have killed at least three of the guys who're
leering at you by now. Not _this_ guy," he said quickly, "'cause
I'm your friend so I'm _allowed_ to leer, 'cause it's in a joking,
friendly, funny kind of way, but I mean those football types who've
had their eyes glued to you the whole night."
     "Hm?" Buffy asked, looking up as she moved a little, half-
leaning against Xander as the band played a slower song. She was
exhausted, and yet somehow she didn't want to sleep.
     Xander sighed, then shook his head and adjusted his grip on
her slightly. "Never mind," he said. "Look...you want to just go
for a walk or something?"
     Buffy shrugged. "Whatever," she said.
     "Okay, then," he said. "Walk, it is."
     She nodded as he led her off the dance floor, and they left
the club without further delay.

~

Comments to [e-mail], please!



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: _-Sun-_ <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Charlotte Sometimes (Part 40)
Date: 27 Jun 1998 20:19:44 -0700

Heh, once again - I'm sorry it's short.
    The next part should be out later tonight

Charlotte Sometimes (Part 40)

    Drusilla awoke, never knowing she'd fallen asleep, to the sounds of
screams. For an instant she thought it was her own voice echoing inside
her head, then that of her sisters. And her fears were only worsened as
she stood up lazily, to gaze over the stairs and look towards the large
window on the first floor.
    She managed to get to the steps in time to see a large rock flying
through the window, effectively shattering it.
    Drusilla gasped backing into the wall, as far as she could get from the
stairs.
And certainly from the window.
    Dropping down she crawled towards the railing looking out through the
wooden bars.
    She listened to the chanting coming from outside the house, watching
the large bright lights of torches sway back and forth, shacking her
head in disbelief as she realized what they were saying.
'Burn the witch!' 'Child of Satan!' 'Go back from where you came'...
    A couple torches went flying though the broken window, immediately
lighting the curtains and overstuffed chairs.

    Drusilla turned to run back into Lydia's room. Slamming the door and
hefting the large wooden latch. She shook as she watched smoke come in
through the cracks of the door, and looked towards the bed wondering if
the sheets would keep the smoke out...

    "Demon," a voice hissed from behind her.
Drusilla spun around, her hair flying in her face, and distorting her
vision as she made out the shape of  a man outside her sisters window.
    Her eyes widened in fear as he smashed open the window, tossing a torch
inside the room, and began to enter through the window. "Go back from
where you came, spawn of--"
    Drusilla watched in fascinated horror as his body was violently pulled
backwards, she watched as her personal demon hissed, barring his fangs
and killed the man


--
_-SuN-_

SD - Http://home.earthlink.net/~kbleyle/SD/index.html
K  - http://home.earthlink.net/~kbleyle/kinky/

    Daylight licked me into shape, I must have been asleep for
days. And moving lips to breathe her name, I opened up my eyes
And found myself alone alone. Alone above a raging sea
That stole the only girl I loved, And drowned her deep inside
of me (The Cure)

_ - _Spikette _ Dru's Dolly - Mercenary_ - _
  _ - _ Head Dominatrix in the Evil _ - _
_ - _   Plan For World Domination, _ - _
  _ - _ With Chains and Stuff _ - _



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: _-Sun-_ <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Charlotte Sometimes (Part 41)
Date: 27 Jun 1998 20:36:18 -0700

What can I say? I was inspired
    Don't own them, don't want to (are you kidding? These characters are so
much trouble!)

Charlotte Sometimes (Part 41)


    "You," She whispered as the flames began their journey consuming the
room.
     Within moments everything was on fire. All her possessions. All her
memories. What was left of her tattered life was now being engulfed in
huge flames.
    "You've killed..." She gasped as she realized what she was up against.
He'd killed everyone nearer to her, everyone she'd loved and cared
about... "My Angel.." Her brows furred together, as she realized she had
one way out. Through God, though death. "...Why?"

*

    He hissed at her when flames flew towards him. The sparks keeping them
apart.
    "Drusilla. Let me in" He kept his voice soft, and well phrased.
    The whole house would be nothing more than ashes in less than an hour.
Idiots, the lot of them. He would make sure to kill every single person
in this town after the night... But for now he had bigger problems, like
getting his love out of the flaming house before she was burned down
with it.
    "Damnit Drusilla!" He screamed at her, as she fell backwards coughing.
"Let me in!"

    "No" She shook her head the best she could, screaming as the bottom of
her dress caught on fire. "I want to be pure!" she shrieked at him in a
fury so unlike herself. She stomped on the flames, her vision rapidly
blurring to the point that she couldn't open her eyes to mere slits
without stinging sensation, the smoke tore apart her throat as she
cried.

*

    Alright. New approach
    "I know Drusilla" He said softly, hoping she could hear him. If
anything happened to her, he was going to make sure this whole damned
town paid. "And you will be pure," Angelus pushed himself to the window
sill, trying to get up so he could see her "pure as god himself."
Without luck, he gazed at the flames. His body begging him run.

    Drusilla blinked as she lay on the floor.
    "You just, need to let me in" He said putting his hand up against the
invisible barrier that kept his unnatural presence out.

"Drusilla." He asked, shocking himself by the amount of emotion his
words carried.

*

    "Angel?" Drusilla asked, now startling herself as her voice echoed back
to her. Smaller, childish, lost perhaps.
    She opened her eyes to the stinging pain.
    She needed proof. Wanted him to say it! That he was her Angel! Not the
demon. She couldn't face the demon again... Her body began to shake
without her real consent as the images of her families bodies lined up
in her mind, after that demon, had hurt them. Hurt them to hurt her!

*
    "I'm here"
    Angelus pushed himself past the window's sill leaning on the barrier if
nothing more, trying to get as close to her as was possible, his mind
ignored the flames and sparks, he managed to still the nerves in his
body that screamed for him to leave... But not for much longer, as fire
came all around his absent mind.

    "Help me" She whispered.
    Angelus's  body fell through the barrier, landing him on the floor of
the child's room, at first he couldn't see Drusilla and he took a couple
steps back, but before his instincts completely took over his eyes
caught a flicker of her beautiful hair as it began to blaze.


--
_-SuN-_

SD - Http://home.earthlink.net/~kbleyle/SD/index.html
K  - http://home.earthlink.net/~kbleyle/kinky/

    Daylight licked me into shape, I must have been asleep for
days. And moving lips to breathe her name, I opened up my eyes
And found myself alone alone. Alone above a raging sea
That stole the only girl I loved, And drowned her deep inside
of me (The Cure)

_ - _Spikette _ Dru's Dolly - Mercenary_ - _
  _ - _ Head Dominatrix in the Evil _ - _
_ - _   Plan For World Domination, _ - _
  _ - _ With Chains and Stuff _ - _



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: [e-mail] (Ivy)
Subject: Re: BUFFYFIC:DISCUSS: Wet and Wild (1/1)
Date: 27 Jun 1998 20:24:41 -0800

ROFLMAO!!!!

THis was the funniest fan fiction I've ever read!  It was funny at the
beginning, but the last line caused me to laugh for like 5 minutes
straight!!!
This was really good.  More like this, it was so funny!!! Great job!

-Ivy

                ^   ^
--------uUUu--| .| |. |--uUUu---------
IVY!!!           | |      (aka-Rachel)
Lover of this    ( )    cool stuff:
SCREAM, TITANIC, The X-Files,
Buffy the Vampire Slayer, South Park,
vampires, poetry, JOSHUA JACKSON!,
Jeremy London,David Duchovny,
Nicholas Brendan, and Leo DiCaprio!
+++++
"I'm the best sex you'll never have."
-Pacey, Dawson's Creek
-------|  |------------|  |-----------
       (   )          (   )
       ooooO          Ooooo

Visit ODD-Obsessed with David Duchovny:
http://www.geocities.com/Hollywood/Lot/4440/





-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: "Fallen From Grace" (5/11)
Date: 28 Jun 1998 11:34:10 EDT

Notes: Takes place the January or so of Angel's change. E-mail me for missing
pieces. :)
Disclaimers: Blake and the Coordinator, etc, are mine. The rest would appear
to belong to High God Joss.
Distribution: Not without my permission, please.
Feedback: YES! To [e-mail], please, whether it be good or bad or
something in-between.

And now, on to the show!

~

                              Five

     Growing up with a dad who had a fetish about organized crime,
Pike was not in a good way after driving for two hours. They-- he
and the nutcase in the suit-- were on their way out of town, and
the nutcase still had a gun pointed at him. The man hadn't spoken,
except to tell Pike which way to turn and where to drive them.
Nothing about what was going on, or why he was being kidnapped like
this. Because that's what it was, even if the guy wasn't going to
admit it, and Pike somehow doubted he would.
     "Stop here," the man said quietly.
     Pike touched the brakes lightly, and the van slowed to a stop
as he pulled over. They were in the middle of nowhere, on a
deserted two-lane highway. No lights, anywhere around them. Prime
vampoid territory, Pike thought with an inward shiver.
     The man, however, didn't look to be phased. "My name is
Alistair Blake," he said, his voice showing only a hint of emotion.
"I am with the Watcher Network. We need your help."
     Pike raised an eyebrow. Talk about freaky. If this Alistair
guy wasn't dressed in khaki, Pike would have been tempted to think
he'd been abducted by MIBs. "Uh-huh."
     "You were once close with Buffy Summers."
     *Yeah, what of it?* All he said was "So?"
     "You've also been in communication with her in the past few
days." Blake shook his head. "You know, Mister Pike, she doesn't
seem to be the nicest of young ladies."
     "She's the Slayer," Pike snapped. "I get the feeling that
doesn't leave time for the social graces."
     "Perhaps not," Blake said with a slight chuckle. "At any rate,
my friend--"
     "I'm not your friend," Pike snapped. "Look, buddy, you want to
put away the gun, we can talk. Unless you do that, though, I'm
perfectly okay with sitting here and getting my brains blown out
over the highway. If you're man enough to do it." 'Cause he had to
admit, life was a lot less worth living if the girl he'd thought he
had something going on with, possibly, might have been willing to
put up with him a little more than it seemed she was. Aw, hell, who
was he kidding? Deep inside, he knew he'd been entertaining
thoughts of convincing Buffy-- who he had thought he would find a
freshman in college-- to come with him to Phoenix. He sighed.
Woulda been nice...but it was just one of those stupid dreams you
got when you were too drunk to think straight.
     "Well," Blake said, "that's certainly not an unreasonable
request." He slipped the gun away. "Mister Pike," he said.
     "Just Pike is fine," Pike said. "Never been much for titles."
     Blake nodded. "You read Watcher Merrick's literature, I
understand?"
     "Yeah, so?"
     "Did it not occur to you that it would be in the best
interests of the network to recover the materials of any Watchers
who pass on?"
     "Yeah, so?" he repeated.
     "Perhaps you should have asked yourself at the time, Pike, why
we wouldn't have picked the books up in your case, before you had
the chance to see them." A slight smile. "You realize, of course,
that we normally do not allow the books to remain where they might
be found for more than a few days."
     Pike shrugged. "So?"
     "Just wanted to make a point."
     "You've made it. Make another one." Now, with the gun no
longer an immediate threat to his life, Pike was willing to toe the
line a little more aggressively.
     "In your reading, you doubtlessly came across the fact that
there can be only one Slayer, correct?"
     "Yeah." And he had. Which had sucked, he'd decided, because it
meant there was no way out for Buffy.
     "Well," Blake said slowly, "Recently, we've learned that may
not be the case."
     Pike's eyes jerked up, and he was now paying complete
attention. "Huhwha?"
     "Last year," Blake began, "there was an incident where Miss
Summers lost her life. She was resuscitated," he said quickly when
Pike opened his mouth to object, "but she had still been
technically dead for a time."
     "And...what does this have to do with me?"
     "When she died, a new Slayer was called. This Slayer has
remained active, despite Miss Summers' current living state." The
corners of Blake's lips curled into something resembling a smile.
"And we think this may be the key to destroying the Dark Threat."
     Pike felt his jaw drop slightly. "Excuse me?"
     "What we need from you," Blake said, ignoring the question,
"is to arrange for Miss Summers to ingest a small amount
of...this." He pulled a small vial out of his pocket. "It's a
chemical that will, effectively, kill her for a length of time long
enough to activate a new Slayer, and yet short enough so that she
will be revived by another compound in the chemical before cellular
decay has become irreparable."
     Pike frowned. "Whoa," he said. "You saying you want me to
_kill_ her?"
     "Temporarily," Blake said with a slight nod. Then the smile
widened slightly. "If all goes as planned," he said, watching
Pike's expression carefully, "then we should be able to create
enough Slayers so that your Miss Summers would no longer have to
battle the Darkness, if she so chose."
     "I thought it was something she couldn't escape."
     "My boy," Blake said as he leaned forward, though he didn't
appear that much older than Pike himself, "Up until last year, it
was thought impossible that there would be more than one Slayer.
Progress, dear Pike, soon proves every so-called impossibility to
be merely another challenge for the human race to overcome." He
pressed the vial into Pike's palm, then leaned back and opened the
door of the van, stepping out. "Make whatever choice your heart
tells you," he said, "but remember: this was never a legacy Miss
Summers asked for."
     Pike glanced down at the vial in his hands, contemplating that
fact-- and when he looked up, Alistair Blake was gone.
                                *
     "Merrick was my first Watcher," Buffy said softly.
     Xander glanced up at the swing next to him, where she was
sitting and absentmindedly pushing herself back and forth, digging
her heels into the dirt beneath her own swing to keep moving. She
hadn't said anything since they had arrived there, and he was
surprised to hear that those would be the first words out of her
mouth. He had sort of been anticipating that her first words would
have been more to the effect of mentioning Angelus' appearance at
the Bronze.
     "Really?" he asked. "What was he like?"
     Buffy shrugged. "Nice," she said quietly. "We got along." She
shook her head. "I mean...it's not every day you find out you're
the one destined to fight the forces of darkness, but...he was
okay."
     She sighed, gripping the chains on the swing and pushing
herself up till she was almost standing, only her toes touching the
dirt. Then she picked her feet up and let herself swing forward.
Xander sighed inwardly, not upping the rate at which he was
swinging back and forth, but just staying quiet and listening to
her speak. "What happened to him?" he finally asked. "You never
talk about it."
     "Because it sucked," she said, her voice quiet but forceful.
"It seriously, seriously sucked." She shook her head. "I mean, you
know about how I killed Lothos, right?"
     Xander nodded. "Yeah," he said. "The seriously old vampire
guy. The Master before the Master."
     Buffy nodded. "Yeah..." She trailed off a moment. "I was so
confused about that, you know. Because he and his second in command
were so _old_." She shook her head. "Giles explained it to me,
though. He says Lothos killed off any vampires who got to be too
much older than about three hundred. To make sure he stayed the
most powerful. And his second in command was blood-bound to him, to
ensure loyalty..." She trailed off. "Sorry. Rambling."
     Xander shrugged. Not as if it mattered to him. It was only
nine-thirty, though it felt like it was later. And it wasn't as
though he was planning on going to school the next day, anyway.
"S'okay," he said. "But, okay, so if this Merrick guy died, and you
left, where'd your friend find out so much about the Wiggmasters?"
     "He read Merrick's library, he says," Buffy murmured with a
slight wince. Xander bit his lips. Whoops, bad question, he
figured. So bringing up the jerk from the Bronze wasn't a good
idea. Okay, that was fine. "Giles says he couldn't have, though."
She sighed.
     "So he was lying?" So he knew he shouldn't ask, but he did
anyway. *Great, Xander,* he told himself. *Way to be seriously
sensitive.*
     But Buffy didn't seem to really mind. She just shrugged.
"Seems like," she said quietly.
     "S'rough," he said. "But hey...you've still got me, and you
know I'd never lie to you." He gave her a goofy grin, glad when she
rewarded him with a slight smile. "'Cause, you know, I'm not really
smart enough to keep up with a big web've stuff I'd hafta
remember." He shook his head. "Which is why I will never be a
political science major."
     That actually earned him a stilted laugh. Which, he supposed,
was better than much of anything else Buffy had given him so far
tonight, so it was a definite step in the right direction. She
slowed her swing slightly, kicking her heels in the dirt, and when
she'd slowed down enough she reached over and touched his arm.
"Thanks," she said with a warm smile. "A lot."
     He shrugged. "No prob," he said as he returned the smile.
     They sat like that for a few seconds' time, neither moving
until Xander broke the gaze, shifting his attention to his feet as
he began to push himself back and forth a bit more. "So this
Merrick guy was pretty cool?" he asked. "Better than Giles?"
     "Different than Giles," Buffy said. "But not better."
     "Cool."
     "Yeah," she said, with a smile of fond remembrance on her
lips. "He's the one who told me to play this game my way."
     Xander grinned slightly. "So Giles can blame him, huh?"
     "Yeah, me being impossible is all Merrick's fault." She
grinned and shook her head. "Bet he'd love to hear that."
     "Bet he would."
     Another silent lull took over them, and the only sound was
that of the chains for the swings needing oil and trying to make
that fact known to anyone who'd listen. Then Buffy sighed. "You
know," she said quietly, "I miss him."
     "Giles?"
     "No...Merrick." She sighed. "Not that I don't love Giles to
death, but..." She shook her head slowly. "I never...I don't know."
She looked up. "Merrick..." She trailed off, then shook her head.
"He knew stuff. Not like, book-knowing stuff, like Giles. I never
saw Merrick touch a book the whole time I was there, but he was
only around when we'd be training or other stuff..." She looked up.
"Giles is more, you know, involved in the day-to-day stuff. There's
not that kind of distance." Her gaze fell back to her lap. "I know
stuff about Giles. Not much, but stuff, you know what I mean?"
     Xander nodded silently. "Yeah."
     "All I know about Merrick is his name. And that he wanted to
be a bootmaker."
     Much as he wanted to pursue the conversation, something in
Buffy's voice told Xander this wasn't a case where talking made
things easier. So he sighed, reaching across the space between them
to take her hand in his own. He gave it a quick squeeze,
then...just held it.
     And the sound of swings creaking in the darkness filled the
night air.

~

Comments to [e-mail], please!



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: "Fallen From Grace" (6/11)
Date: 28 Jun 1998 14:42:26 EDT

Notes: Takes place the January or so of Angel's change. E-mail me for missing
pieces. :)
Disclaimers: Blake and the Coordinator, etc, are mine. The rest would appear
to belong to High God Joss.
Distribution: Not without my permission, please.
Feedback: YES! To [e-mail], please, whether it be good or bad or
something in-between.

And now, on to the show!

~

                               Six

     He could save her. That's what Alistair Blake had made clear
to Pike, that he'd just been given the power to save the woman he
loved from the life she hated.
     *God, hold _on_ a minute, Pike!* he told himself. *That girl
just kicked you out on your _ass_, and you're still telling
yourself you're in _love_ with her?!* He shook his head. Way too
screwed up, here. This shouldn't be a priority. Yeah, last time
there had been that whole mutual-saving-of-asses thing going on,
but Buff had made it more than clear, she wasn't gonna dig the
whole walking-back-into-her-life-and-picking-up-with-even-a-little-
of-what-they'd-had thing. Pike sighed. This sucked, it seriously
_sucked_, and somehow he was still gripping the vial in his hand.
He should, he told himself, throw it out realize Buffy completely
deserved being stuck with this whole destiny/fate complex she had
fallen into. Somehow, though, he had the feeling that wasn't going
to happen.
     He sighed again. This was always the way, then, wasn't it.
First Buffy, then that goth chick in San An, and now Buffy again.
How come all the nice girls he fell for always wound up being
totally messed up in the end? Shallow and helpless or else twisted
so far he wasn't sure he knew who they really were in the end?
     At least, he thought, he was now in the rear of his van, which
was parked in an empty lot instead of in the middle of nowhere. He
had tucked himself inside the sleeping bag he'd had since he first
left home at age sixteen, telling himself to get some sleep. But
sleep wasn't coming, and instead he was staring up at the van's
ceiling, obsessing over the fact that if he were outside, he'd be
able to look up and see the stars-- the same ones Buffy was no
doubt looking up at.
     A soft scratching at the rear window made him glance over, and
when he saw the man there, he nearly choked. Then he recognized
him-- that guy from the bar who'd been so kind as to let him know
Buffy wouldn't want to hear anything he had to say to her. Little
freaky, Pike decided, but the guy had been nothing but obliging so
far, so he sat up and climbed out of his sleeping bag, then got up
and unlatched the back door, watching it swing out.
     "Hey," the guy said, smiling slightly. "What's with the van?"
     "Just passing through," Pike said, rubbing his eyes a little.
Had to be past midnight. "Didn't see any point in renting a hotel
room. Couldn't find any cheap hotels around here, either."
     "Yeah, that's Sunnydale for you," the guy said. "Bunch of
middle-class yuppies who have big houses, so the few relatives who
do come to visit this hellhole stay with their families instead of
in a hotel." He shrugged. "And there's not a high teenage drifter
quotient."
     Pike nodded, trying to decide just what it was this guy
wanted, and why he was standing there, not moving. "Uh-huh," he
said.
     "Hey," the guy said, offering a hand, "name's Angel. You?"
     Pike took the hand, shaking it. "Pike."
     To his credit, Angel didn't make a dig at the name. Then
again, Pike supposed being named 'Angel' didn't leave a lot of room
for making fun of other people in the name department. "And you
knew Buffy back in the day?" he asked.
     "You could say that," Pike replied. He shrugged. "Obviously
don't know her anymore."
     Angel nodded slowly, offering a half-helpless shrug. "Hey,
women change." He shook his head. "Buffy just goes through more
dramatic changes than most other women."
     Pike grinned, getting the feeling this guy knew more than he
was letting on-- and liking the fact, because it meant maybe he'd
be able to have a real conversation with him. A real conversation
was just what Pike knew he needed right now. Not a shitfest of
meaningless drivel, but a real psycho-analyzing thing. Figure out
what it was that made Buffy tick, why it was she always shifted so
quickly. Why he couldn't ever seem to figure her out, even back
when they had been together. One night she'd be hot, the next
cold...
     "...like she doesn't even realize you're there," Angel
finished.
     Pike glanced up, surprised. He hadn't realized he was speaking
aloud. "Thinking out loud," he said quickly.
     "No problem," Angel said, putting a hand on Pike's shoulder as
he leaned against the doorway. He smiled slightly, something
glimmering in his eye. "She really screwed you up, man, didn't
she."
     "Not on purpose," Pike said, his gaze falling to the ground.
     "Yeah, well, if you say so," Angel replied. Then he looked
around, a troubled expression crossing his face. "Hey, you know,
this isn't the safest place to be around here."
     Pike shrugged. "Nah, but it's my van, and like I said, I can't
find a good hotel."
     "Yeah..." Angel said slowly, then he turned his gaze on the
ground for a moment before looking back up. "Look, Pike, I think
I'm gonna have to kind of insist that you not stay out here."
     "Why not?"
     "Well," Angel said, swallowing and looking half-apologetic,
"this is gonna sound completely insane, but...stuff around here
isn't always what it seems. And you don't want to be in the wrong
place when that stuff comes out to play."
     Pike raised an eyebrow. Angel knew Buffy, and he'd just all
but said outright that he knew about the Hellmouth...which meant he
could know about quite a few other things. It also meant Pike could
most likely confide in him. He nodded. "So where am I supposed to
go, then?" he asked.
     Angel appeared half-surprised that Pike had taken his word for
matters so quickly. "You could stay at my place, if you want," he
said.
     Pike nodded, and Angel stepped out of the way to let him lock
and close the back doors of the van. "Sounds good," he said.
"Where're you at?"
     "Got an apartment a few blocks away," Angel said with a smile.
"Come on." Without waiting, he turned and began to walk away, and
Pike soon had to pick up his own pace to keep up with the other.
                                *
     "So," Angel said as he settled into the chair opposite the
sofa he had told Pike to sit on. "How much do you know about
Buffy?"
     Pike grinned slightly. "She's a pretty...special girl."
     Angel shrugged. "Doesn't carry herself like it, though," he
said. "I mean, she acts like she's the only one who can do half of
what she does."
     "Maybe she is," Pike replied, as he was struck with the nutty
feeling that maybe there was more to this on Angel's part than what
he saw on the surface. The entire conversation had had an air of
surreality since the beginning.
     "Maybe there's another one just like her, out there
somewhere."
     Pike swallowed. Okay, this was getting to be pretty blatant
double-talk. They were obviously each feeling each other out to see
how much the other knew-- at least, Pike knew he was, and he was
getting a more and more acute feeling that Angel was doing the
same. "So," he said, clearing his throat slightly. "How do you know
her?"
     Angel shrugged. "We used to be a thing."
     "Uh-huh." Pike looked him over, then shook his head. "You
know," he said, "you don't look like the kind of guy she'd hang out
with."
     "You don't think?"
     "Nah," Pike said. He shrugged. "You're more like somebody..."
He shook his head. "Can't quite put my finger on it, but more
like..." He trailed off, at a loss for words, and shook his head.
He wanted to say, Angel reminded him of Benny-- but that was nuts,
because the last time he'd seen Benny it had been because his ex-
best friend had been trying to eat the student population of Hemery
High.
     Angel smiled slightly. "Somebody you probably should have
stayed away from," he said.
     Pike raised an eyebrow. "'Scuse me?" he asked.
     "I saw you leave the club," Angel said, and he suddenly didn't
seem so friendly. He stood, looking down at Pike and giving the
other man the feeling of being quite small, quite insignificant.
"And...I hope you don't _mind_," he continued, "but I hitched a
ride."
     "Hitched a...?" Pike stood, shooting a glance toward the door.
"You know," he said, "maybe it'd be a good idea if I left now, hm?
And we could, you know, meet up later and have a talk if you really
think it's necessary. Because, well, we don't need to talk about
things right now and you seem to be stressing about something,
though I'm not really sure--" He broke off as Angel's features
suddenly shifted, becoming far more pronounced, and far more
menacing. "Holy _fuck_!" he shouted, scrambling backward a few
feet. "What the _hell_?!"
     "That'd be about right," Angel said, then he lunged toward
Pike with a feral growl, knocking him to the floor.
     Pike felt something cool and hard hit against his skull, and
then the world went black.
                                *
     Angelus glared down at the motionless form beneath him, then
shot a rueful glance at the table he'd accidentally thrown Pike
against. He knew he should have moved that thing.
     The sound of a throat clearing from the shadows caught his
attention, supposedly reminding him that Pike's fate was one
decision Angelus didn't have to take on.
     He growled, turning toward the Watcher who had stepped out
from the shadows. Blake was wearing, along with the tweed suit, a
rather self-satisfied smile. "Nicely done," he said, his voice
bearing the slightest hint of a congratulatory tone.
     Angelus offered him an annoyed smile. "No prob," he snapped.
"Now you guys are gonna stay the fuck outta my way while I take
care of the Slayer. Right?"
     Blake smiled. "Of course," he replied. He cast a look toward
Pike's unconscious form. "I wouldn't dream of getting in the way of
such a..." He looked back up at Angelus before finishing, his smile
becoming an insincere one. "...Master."
     Angelus hid a smirk, wondering if this Watcher had any idea of
just who it was he was dealing with. "So," he said. "You're willing
to do...whatever it takes...to bring her down?"
     "Temporarily, yes," Blake replied.
     "Good," Angelus said. He took a step toward the Watcher,
extending a hand as though to shake on a deal.
     But when Blake reached out to take his hand, Angelus sprang
into action. Grabbing Blake's arm, twisting sharply, hearing the
crack as he shoved the Watcher to the ground and ground the skull
into the floor, leaving a large stain that would most likely be a
pain in the ass to clean on the floor...all the motions streamlined
into one, and then Angelus found that time had slowed and moved
back to a regular pace as he found himself standing with a limp and
ragged body in his hands, the head of which was simply a large,
bloody mass of pulp, barely held to the rest.
     He dropped the mutilated corpse to the floor, ignoring the
blood as it seeped into the rug alongside the rest of the contents
of Blake's apparently near-empty skull.
     Angelus snorted. Idiot Watcher. Damned arrogant. Not that the
arrogance hadn't served his purpose. He smiled slightly. He now
knew exactly what Pike's relationship was to Buffy. He knew why the
Watchers had been interested in seeing her dead. And he knew they
wouldn't step in should something happen to the young Slayer.
     In other words, he thought smugly, he now knew every single
thing he would need to know to carry out Buffy's destruction.
     The only loose end that was left to deal with would be this
young hothead. There were several options open at this point, and
all of them held a special sort of allure. The most reasonable,
Angelus already knew, would be to use the boy as bait for the
Slayer. But no, he told himself, that would be far too easy, both
for Buffy and for Pike.
     The corners of his lips tugged upward as a new thought
occurred.
     Yes, Angelus thought to himself...the next few days were
definitely going to be quite a bit more interesting than those
which had preceded them.

~

Comments to [e-mail], please!



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: Jessica Dubois <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Friends No Matter What (1/1)
Date: 28 Jun 1998 17:36:47 -0400

Title: Friends No Matter What (1/1)
Author: Jessica Dubois
E-mail: [e-mail]
Distribution: Please ask first. It'll be archived eventually at my own
site, The Place Where Forbidden Love Dwells,
<http://www.fortunecity.com/lavendar/attenborough/295/>
Rating: PG
Summery: It's a short piece, and mostly fluff. Just read it.
Disclaimer: I don't own Willow or Angel or any of the gang. Mutant
Enemy, Joss Whedon,  'Grr Arg' and 'Aw, I Need A Hug' do. No copyright
infringement intended. No profit is being made.
Feedback: Yes, please.
Author's Note: This is my fourth story in my as yet untitled series of
Angel/Willow pieces. It's set between Willow's Challenge/Angel's Hope
and The Rewards of Happiness.

Friends no Matter What
By: Jessica Dubois

    Willow rapped her knuckles on the table. He was late. He'd PROMISED to
be here. Buffy was off patrolling, and since things were still pretty
quiet, she'd finagled a promise from Angel to meet her here, so they
could talk, and get to know each other. They were really starting to
form a friendship, and she wanted to meet with him under happier
circumstances, but he was over a half-an-hour late. She hoped nothing
had happened to him.

    In that moment, Angel entered Willow's field of vision. He looked fine,
which went a ways to relieve Willow's worry, but he had a very grim
expression on his face. Willow's forehead furrowed.

    "Angel?" she asked tentatively, as he arrived by her table. "Is
everything ok?"

    He looked darkly at her. "No. Everything's not ok. I just wanted to say
goodbye."

    "WHAT!?!?!?!" Willow yelped. Several people close by turned to look at
her, which made her blush. "What?" she said again in a much quieter
voice. "Why?"

    "It's better this way. It's too dangerous for me to have friends. They
could become targets."

    "But, Buffy..." Willow protested.

    "Buffy can take care of herself. But you can't. So, it's better if I
just fade into the background. Like I used to." Willow's eyes rounded
with pain, and she tucked her head close to her chest. Angel leaned
forward, and brushed his cool fingers against her cheek. "It's better
this way." Angel said softly, then got up, and left the Bronze.

    Willow's head shot up. "Angel!" She got up and ran after him, but he
had slipped through the crowd as if he was a ghost, while Willow kept
getting caught in tangles of people. By the time she got out the door,
Angel was gone.

    Willow headed for home, dejected. Then an idea came to mind, and a
smile crossed her face. She'd be DAMNED before she let Angel give up.
She'd do whatever it took to make Angel understand that she was his
friend. No matter what.

                    *****

    Angel sighed as held the mug in his hands. He'd hated hurting Willow
like that, but it was necessary. She didn't understand how dangerous it
was to be close to him. He'd tried to have a friend once, fifty or so
years ago. And he'd been killed, because of what Angel was... is. <It's
not going to happen again.>

    Angel frowned as a knock interrupt his introspective. Nobody knew he
was here, except for Xander, Buffy and a few vamps he'd rather not deal
with at the moment, and Buffy was currently patrolling.

    Angel opened the door, ready for anything. Or so he told himself. A
furious Willow was the last person he was expecting, and as such, she
easily got past him and inside his apartment. Angel sighed, closed the
door, and turned to face her.

    He supposed that it had been wishful thinking on his part that Willow
would just accept his decision. She might be quiet, but when she got her
teeth into something... Especially when one of her friends were
involved. And she considered him a friend, even though that was a very
bad idea.

    "Why are you here, Willow?" he asked. "We have nothing to say to each
other."

    "You know why, and that's just a big lie," Willow practically hissed at
him, as she started to pace. Angel looked at her with confusion. This
wasn't the Willow he knew, although he had gotten a glimpse of this
creature before. It had been when Buffy had snuck off to the frat party,
and Willow had torn into him and Giles.

    "I'm not going to let you just burrow yourself into a hole, and shut
yourself away from the world. You deserve to have friends, and I'm NOT
going to let you push me away."

    "You don't understand, Willow. It's dangerous to be close to me," Angel
said in what he thought was a reasonable tone, but desperation and grief
tinged every word. "People around me get killed, no matter how hard I
try otherwise. It's not wise..." Angel trailed off, trying to suppress
the emotions that were raging through him. He'd never truly dealt with
his friend's death, and it was now trying to tear him apart. He tried to
suppress his emotions, but wasn't having any luck. A single blood tear
started to roll down his cheek. Willow was immediately with him. She
pulled him over to the couch, and sat down, pulling him down beside her.
He was so consumed with grief that he didn't even notice. She cradled
his head against her chest, stroking his hair and murmuring soothing
words, as he started to cry earnestly. His arms curled around her,
holding her close. He didn't cry as a normal person did, but his body
was stiff with grief, and tears ran down his face, catching in the
material of her shirt.

    After about fifteen minutes, the tears slowed, and Angel pulled away.
There was blood smeared over most of his face, and his eyes had torture
in them. He looked down at her chest.

    "I ruined your shirt. I'm sorry." Angel stood as Willow looked down and
gasped when she saw the big bloodstain that covered the front of her
shirt. Angel offered her a clean shirt. She took it and held it in her
arms.

    "I'm not going to leave you, Angel, and I'm not going to die." Willow
made a small rueful sound. "Alright, correction, I'm not going to die
anytime soon." She looked into Angel's eyes, while Angel looked at
anything but her.

    "I can't... I can't do it again, Willow. I can't lose my friends
again." She didn't understand. No one planed on dying, it just happened.
He couldn't do it again. Lose someone who depended on him.

    Willow looked at Angel. "Angel." He looked at her, finally. She closed
her eyes, and composed herself. "No one every wants to lose someone. But
that's the way life is. You live, you learn, you love, and you lose. And
if you don't do this, your life is hollow. You have to take chances,
Angel."

    Angel shook his head. "I won't risk the people around me. I won't-"
Angel stopped when Willow put a finger to his lips.

    "It's my choice, Angel. Not yours. If I want to risk being your friend,
then just accept that. Because I am going to risk it, and nothing is
going to stop me. And if you decide to be stubborn, then I'm just going
to have to find another way to convince you. Follow you around. Bug you.
Whatever it takes. And if I get myself killed when I'm out alone at
night..." Willow shrugged. "That's my choice too." Willow looked
defiantly at him. She sighed. "The way I see it, you have two choices.
One is to accept that I'm your friend and that I'm not going anywhere.
The other is to try to shut me out of your life. And I'm not going to
accept that. Which means I'll do everything in my power, and more, to
get you to see that."

    Angel looked torn. "Willow." His voice was filled with anguish. He then
came to a decision. It was foolish. It would get her killed, but he
didn't know what else to do. And he really would like a friend again. It
was nice, being able to talk to someone, without worrying about exactly
what he could say and what he couldn't. Angel nodded his head. "Alright,
Willow. We're friends."

    Instantly Willow's somber attitude vanished, and she grinned from ear
to ear, and bounced on her toes. She calmed slightly, but still exuded
an aura of happiness.

    "Great!"

    "I should take you home." Willow nodded and headed for the door.

    "Willow." Willow turned and looked askance at him. "Your shirt?" Willow
looked at the shirt still in her hand, then down at the shirt she was
wearing.

    "Oops," she said sheepishly, blushing. Angel smiled lightly, and
pointed her towards the bathroom. She practically ran into it, and
slammed the door. Angel shook his head as he waited for her. This new
friendship was going to be interesting, that was for sure. And he had a
feeling that they would always be friends. No matter what.

Fin

--
"Ours is a forbidden love." - Willow, Lie to Me
"She's dancing... Dancing with Death!" - Drucilla, IOHE4U

Keeper of Willow's Spellcasting Ability

Visit my Site
The Place Where Forbidden Love Dwells
http://www.fortunecity.com/lavendar/attenborough/295/index.html



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Reflections 4/7
Date: 28 Jun 1998 20:39:21 EDT

Title~ Reflections 4/7
Author~Shani
Timeline~ letÆs say between Go Fish and Becoming I & II--Becomings will not
happen here
Summary~ Angelus becomes Angel, but has some thinking to do before going to
Buffy...if he decides to go to Buffy at all.
Disclaimer~ The characters of Buffy the Vampire Slayer belong to Joss Whendon,
Mutant Enemy Productions, Kuzui Enterprises, Sandollar Productions, and 20th
Century Fox.  No infringement intended.  Story for entertainment purposes
only.
Feedback~ YES, YES, YES, YES!!  Please send all comments to [e-mail]


    Angel stepped into the sunlight.  Sunnydale was a completely different town
when lit with the light of the afternoon sun.  Angel took in all the sights
around him, but would not stop until he reached the SummersÆ home.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    Buffy was about to fall asleep when she heard knocking coming from her front
door.  Yawning, she went downstairs.
    ôComing!!ö she called.
    She slowly opened the door, not really wanting to deal with a sales person at
the moment.  What she saw nearly knocked her off her feet.
    There Angel stood, the sunlight surrounding him like a halo.
    ôAngel?ö  BuffyÆs voice was barely a whisper.  Angel reached out to her.  He
gently cupped her face.  She leaned into his touch, tears running down her
face.  Reality finally set in.
    ôHow?ö she asked, her eyes filling with questions and things that she wanted
to say.
    ôIÆm, IÆm not sure.  Can I come in?  I think we need to talk.ö
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    ôBuffyÆs not really going to die, right Giles?ö  Willow said.
    ôOf course not.  I mean, sheÆs Buffy,ö Oz comforted.
    ôI donÆt know, Willow.  I wish that I did.ö Giles said, his voice distant.
He remembered the last time it was written that she would die.  She did die,
but she was brought back.  He wondered if she could handle dying again.  He
wondered if they could handle her dying again.
    ôShe killed the master.  A golam shouldnÆt be a problem.ö  Xander said.
ôSheÆs died and come back before, as long as weÆre there, we can bring her
back again.ö
    ôI just wish we could help.ö  Willow whispered to herself.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    Angel and Buffy held each other.  They had talked for hours, filling each
other in on what had happened to them physically and emotionally.  Talking
about what would happen when they made it known that he was back and that he
was human.  The discussed their immediate plans for the future...
    Angel pulled away slightly.  ôLet me see you in the sunlight,ö he asked
gently.
    Taking his hand, Buffy pulled him off the couch and out the front door.  They
stood there a moment.  Each completely unaware of anything but them and the
fact that they were here together.
    Embracing, Angel whispered, ôI love you.ö
    A new wave of tears streamed down BuffyÆs cheeks as she kissed him.  To
Angel, that said much more than any words she could have spoken.





-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: [e-mail]
Subject: BUFFYFIC: DISCUSS: "Reunion" incongruities
Date: 28 Jun 1998 21:01:47 EDT

"Reunion" readers-

You'll have to pardon the incongruity between parts 25 and 26. I didn't
have a copy of the former when I wrote the latter, and things got a bit
screwed up there. The hill should be white in part 25 as well. That's
about it.

-Ingrid

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From: [e-mail]
Subject: BUFFYFIC: "Reunion," by Ingrid (28/?)
Date: 28 Jun 1998 21:01:47 EDT

DISCLAIMER: The characters arenÆt mine.
SUMMARY: Thank you for watching the show-
Now this is what *really* happened <g>.
IF YOU would like previous parts, just e-mail me,
and IÆll be happy to send them to you (That is if
I can still start my computer up)!

***
"Reunion" by Ingrid
Part 28: "What Happened"
***

Consciousness returned slowly. The first thing she
felt was the frozen ground beneath her. She sat up
and noticed the woods was back again.

The second thing she noticed was Angel on the
ground a few feet away. She crept over to him
slowly, trying to look around at the same time. He
was slowly coming to.

"Buffy, what happened? I was following you, but
my ankle-" He cringed as his hand met the sore
spot.

"You remember. YouÆre here. WeÆve got to find
everybody else. WeÆve got to find Willow."

"What do you mean find her? We left her with the-"

"Angel, weÆve got to find her." BuffyÆs voice was
intense. She couldnÆt trust it, despite seeing him here;
talking. She just wanted her daughter back. She wanted
her life. "Come on." She reached out for his hands and
pulled him up towards her.

He winced again, but didnÆt complain. He was worried.
SheÆd seen something, he knew.

***

Cordelia and Xander woke up nearly simultaneously,
while Corin remained unconscious for some time.

"Oh my God, what happened?" Cordelia held her
pounding head and turned to Xander. There were
buildings; I got lost. I couldnÆt find her. WeÆve
got to find her!"

Corin rose just then. "Mrs. Harris?"

"Are you okay, Corin?"

"My head hurts a little, but I think IÆm okay."

"Aright. LetÆs get out of here."

***

Giles awoke as snow was just beginning to
form in the sky. He hadnÆt found anything. He
hadnÆt been able to do anything.

Once again, heÆd had to put all his faith in her.
Most probably the last time. HeÆd missed her.

Rubbing at the bridge of his nose, he got up,
and began to walk slowly back to the house,
again confident that all was well.

He just knew it was.

BuffyÆd never let him down.

***

Angel was barely able to keep up with her pace.
The pain in his angle was becoming increasingly
difficult to stand.

Buffy flew out of the woods more than ran, never
tripping on the large roots that stuck out of the
ground like spidersÆ legs. The sight of the big
house on the white hill sent the blood flowing
through her veins again. She looked back at
Angel in dismay.

HeÆd just gotten done tripping over a little rock
in the middle of the leaf covered forest. It was
beginning to snow again; little flurries twisting
their way to the earth. He looked up at her and
bit his lip. And continued at a faster rate than
before.

They got up to the porch only to find Cordelia
Xander and Corin close behind them.

"I have to get in there," Buffy called urgently.

Cordelia didnÆt ask. She simply whipped out
the keys and jammed them into the door.
Buffy scrambled through the doorframe,
nearly slamming into the walls on the way
in.

In the guestroom, the young teenager stood
up and nearly screamed at Buffy. SheÆd forgotten
about all the blood. She must have looked
frightening. But that was the last thing on her
mind.

She heard a little giggle from the crib and
collapsed against the railings. Safe and sound,
and completely oblivious to the past 10 hours
WillowÆd been tucked in bed watching the
mobile dance.

***
END, 28.

Regarding the fourth of July:

"To be truly traditional, the grill should be constructed
of the following materials:

* 4 percent "rust-resistant" steel;
* 58 percent rust;
* 23 percent hardened black grill scunge from food
   cooked as far back as 1987 (The scunge should
   never be scraped off, because it is what is actually
   holding the grill together);
* 15 percent spiders"

--Dave Barry

_____________________________________________________________________
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Get completely free e-mail from Juno at http://www.juno.com
Or call Juno at (800) 654-JUNO [654-5866]



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From: <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: "Fallen From Grace" (7/11)
Date: 29 Jun 1998 08:43:25 EDT

Notes: Takes place the January or so of Angel's change. E-mail me for missing
pieces. :)
Disclaimers: Blake and the Coordinator, etc, are mine. The rest would appear
to belong to High God Joss.
Distribution: Not without my permission, please.
Feedback: YES! To [e-mail], please, whether it be good or bad or
something in-between.

And now, on to the show!

~

                              Seven

     Fuckin' weird nightmare, that had been. Staring up into the
mask of Hell--
     --and having it stare back. Which, Pike realized slowly, it
was still doing. He swallowed hard, trying to back up for an
instant before he realized he was still lying flat on his back. He
was barely breathing, of course, because he was so terrified he
could barely move.
     "Who the hell--"
     The monster-- and now, Pike realized, it had to be a vampire,
because what else had those kinds of teeth and that kind of look
even though this guy really didn't look like Benny anymore, which
was okay 'cause Benny had tried to eat him and jesusfuckingchrist
this was too freaky for him to be processing so soon after waking
up-- reached down and grabbed him by the collar, hauling him up
against a wall and shaking his head. "Pikey," he said, a touched
tone of hurt showing through in his voice, "I'm getting the feeling
that suddenly you're not so glad to see me."
     "Wonder why," Pike managed to murmur, struggling in vain
against the vampire's grip. Who the hell _was_ this freak? And how
could he, Pike, have been so damn _stupid_? Going home with some
nutcase on the Hellmouth, of all places, and thinking he was
getting a free night's stay? He felt woozy, had this guy already
fed on him, maybe? Was it possible that he hadn't been able to
figure out what was going on because he was suffering from extreme
blood loss? And if so, then how the hell was he supposed to get out
of here? And why couldn't he make his mind slow down enough so that
he could think straight? Or even just mildly zig-zagged thinking
would be acceptable in this situation, because it wasn't that he
was picky so much as he couldn't think of anything he could think
right now.
     "Well," the vampire-- _Angel_?! This was Angel? The thought
hit him like a mack truck, and Pike couldn't believe it when he
thought it, because Angel had been, well, a nice guy and all and he
certainly hadn't seemed like he was going to go all vampoid on him,
and man oh man did Pike ever need to cut back on the wackiness in
his life. "Probably be best if I let you go now, you know." Angel
shook his head. "Buffy gets upset when I get too involved with her
friends. Although, you know, you guys are pretty damn entertaining
sometimes."
     Pike watched in shock as the vampire stood, backing off a few
paces and nodding toward the entrance.
     "Well?" Angel asked as his features melted back into those of
the guy Pike had walked here with, "Are you going to go, or do I
get to eat you after all?"
     No, Pike wanted to say, that wouldn't be necessary, because he
was going _now_. As he stumbled to his feet, the monster watched
him. Hungrily staring, almost leering. Making Pike feel like the
entree to some expensive four-course meal.
     Pike found that he was almost incapable of remaining on his
feet to get himself out of the room. By the time he got to the
street, however, the problems seemed to have left and he took off,
running as fast as he could run.
     That vampire had mentioned Buffy, and no way in hell was Pike
about to let that little bitch screw him over. She was, he had
learned after they had killed Lothos, way too susceptible to a grin
and an innocent look-- how many times had he managed to weasel
himself out of trouble by flashing her the hurt-puppy-look?-- and
it was altogether possible that she had no idea what was going on
with this Angel guy. The darker possibility, he realized, was that
she was working with him. In which case, he should have kept the
vial that Blake guy had given him, because from everything he'd
read Pike knew that a vampire who fought with or for a Slayer
wasn't something that was supposed to happen. Screwed up the
universal balance between good and evil, or something like that.
     And, Pike told himself, she'd been awfully pissed when he'd
spoken to her earlier.
     Finally, when he reached his van and then drove it a few miles
from where he'd had it parked, Pike found himself feeling slightly
safer. But by now, it was three in the morning. And no way was he
gonna go hash this out with her when she was possibly in league
with a crazy vampire who had just threatened to eat him and it was
dark out.
     No, he'd wait until the next morning. And go back to the high
school. And talk to her Watcher, tell him what his charge was up
to. And they'd just see if that didn't make some sort of difference
in the way things were going.
     Or would he?
     Pike sighed. *Get over it, man,* he wanted to shout at himself
as he slid into his sleeping bag and wondered how long it would be
before the sun came up. How much sleep he'd get. Because he really
did need sleep.
                                *
     Trig. Yuck. Buffy wrinkled her nose as she shoved her failed
test into her backpack, making for the library before the bell rang
and somebody caught her. She rolled her eyes. Like she needed that
kind of hassle, with everything else.
     As the thoughts of what Giles had told her about the Network
and its intentions began to seep back into her brain, Buffy sighed
and shook her head, hating herself for letting herself think about
it. Wasn't what she wanted to be doing.
     She pushed through the doors to the library, wondering what
more there was for her to do than sit and let Giles lie to her,
tell her everything would be alright when they both knew perfectly
well it wouldn't.
     Well, she thought, as she heard an angry and somewhat familiar
voice, eavesdropping could always be a fun way to pass the time.
     "She sent some friggin' vampire after me!"
     "I assure you, she would do no such--"
     "Aw, come _on_, cut the whole innocent routine! The Network is
after her and she thought she could even the score by sending
somebody after _me_?"
     Buffy's eyes narrowed as she realized, Giles' ideas about Pike
had been right. They must have been, if he was now talking about
her sending someone after him because of it.
     "She did no such thing, and the fact that you would consider
it a possibility shows that you yourself _do_ have something to do
with--"
     "No, I _didn't_! I told you already, some guy came to me the
other night, but it wasn't until after I'd been in this freakin'
town and right after that this vamp--"
     "Vampire?"
     Buffy raised an eyebrow, wondering what the hell was going on.
"Excuse me," she said, taking a breath and walking past the shelves
to where the other two were standing, "but were you guys talking
about me?"
     Giles glanced toward her, and he looked the same as normal, if
a bit flustered. Pike, on the other hand...Buffy's eyes widened
when she saw the red mark on his throat.
     "Hey," he snapped at her, his eyes narrowing in anger. "Nice
of you to drop by. Surprised to see me?" He shrugged. "Next time,
get a better vamp to do the job, 'cause that fucker you were
dealing with screwed you over." He gave her that half-grin, full of
sarcasm and his trademark screw-the-world attitude, shaking his
head. "Nice touch, by the way, fake name of Angel, yeah, like that
wasn't a thousand fucking percent see-through--"
     "Angel?" The words she had been prepared to yell at him for
accusing her of working with a vampire died on her lips at the name
of her former lover, current nemesis.
     "Yeah," Pike glared. "So, you want to explain some, huh?"
     He glanced from Buffy to her Watcher, getting the sudden
feeling that maybe he'd misinterpreted things. Slightly. Especially
because of the horrified look on Buffy's face, the one that was
echoed in the Watcher's face. It was several seconds before Buffy
spoke, and when she did her voice was a bit quieter. "I think," she
said, "we need to talk."
     "No _shit_."
     "No," she said. "You don't understand. Angel--" She broke off,
glancing at her Watcher with something that looked like a desperate
plead for an explanation.
     The Watcher, to his credit, kept his cool, though Pike could
tell he was somewhat flustered. Probably more than somewhat, but
the way these Brits constantly refused to acknowledge they had
anything akin to emotion, Pike wasn't surprised that barely
anything showed.
     "Angel," the Watcher began, "is, well, if you've read the
books left in Watcher Merrick's apartment--"
     "Which I have," Pike interrupted.
     The Watcher gave him an annoyed look, but continued as though
the interruption hadn't occurred. "Then you no doubt read
references to the demon, Angelus, from Galway, Ireland."
     Pike's eyes narrowed to slits as the name clicked immediately,
and he mentally cursed himself for not seeing the connection
earlier. "Shit, yeah." He glanced toward Buffy. "You're in _league_
with that asshole? Do you know what he's done?" His gaze jerked
back to the Watcher. "Does she know what he's like?"
     "I assure you," the Watcher said, his voice thin, "she is
perfectly aware of Angelus' capabilities." He shook his head, then
sighed, and Pike looked back to Buffy.
     "Buff?"
     She swallowed, then looked at him. Straight at him. None of
the dodging, half-looks she'd been giving him since he'd arrived.
Pike could kill himself, just the mere fact that she was looking
_at_ him was enough to pick up his mood. What kind of idiot was he?
Then he sighed inwardly, resigning himself to the fact that as much
as she might piss him off, Buffy Summers was definitely a force he
was gonna wind up having the reckon with for the rest of his
natural life. Possibly longer.
     "Where is he?" she asked. "Angel."
     Pike's brow furrowed. "Huh?"
     She glanced to her Watcher, and the two of them seemed to
share some sort of silent communication. "He's got to learn, he
can't just go around screwing with the people I care about and
think he's gonna get off without having some serious issues with
_me_," she snapped. "Where is he."
     "I..." Pike swallowed, still not quite believing that he was
hearing, well, what he was hearing. She was gonna kick ass for him?
He quickly put away the stupid grin he could feel forming on his
face, putting a businesslike manner on instead. "He's got an
apartment across town--" he began, but got no further before Buffy
interrupted.
     "I know where it is, then." She looked at her Watcher.
"Giles," she said, "Keep an eye on Pike here, would you?"
     "Of-- of course," the Watcher-- Giles, Pike told himself--
replied. "But Buffy, do you really think--"
     "Not now," she said.
     "Whoa, hold up," Pike said, stepping between Buffy and the
door as she moved to go. "You saying you're gonna just, off and
after him?"
     "Yeah," she replied, turning back to face him.
     Pike shivered. Okay. This was the same look he'd seen in her
eyes that night at Hemery, just before she'd flung a molotov
cocktail through the window and the gym had exploded in a mass of
flames. He was most definitely not gonna mess with Buffy in this
mood. "Good luck, then," he finally said.
     She smiled, but her eyes were hard and her tone was harder.
"Thanks," she said.
     "I mean it," he said, taking a step forward, meaning to give
her a kiss. One for luck, he insisted to himself, though he knew it
was a lie.
     She pulled away from him, turning and walking out of the
library without another word. Pike's eyes followed her slowly, and
he found himself alone with the Watcher, and feeling rather
useless.
     Again.

~

Comments to [e-mail], please!



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: Jeanie the Tortoise-Fly <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Kendra (0/?) revamped version
Date: 29 Jun 1998 09:38:55 -0700 (PDT)


TITLE: "Kendra"(0/?) revamped version of part 1--now prologue
AUTHOR: Jeanie the Tortoise-Fly
EMAIL: <[e-mail]>
DISTRIBUTION:  Anya, Windrider TLM, and Joel TPW yes, anyone else "ask
and ye shall receive."
SPOILER WARNING: "Prophecy Girl", "What's My Line part I and II"
SUMMARY: Kendra has spent her whole life training to be a slayer.  How
did she know she was to be a chosen one?  What happened before she met
Buffy and co.?
DISCLAIMER: Kendra and all other Buffy related characters do not
belong to me.  I'm just borrowing them for a while.  They belong to
Joss Whedon, Mutant enemy, WB etc.  "Grr Argg."  The name Sam Zabuto
is taken from the dialogue of 'What's My Line Part II.'  Kendra's
family members [Carrah, Annalise, Shali, Nuru and Kaleb] and the
details of her past are creations of mine.  If you'd like to play with
them, I'd be happy to lend them to you with my blessings, just ask
first and remember to ignore anything Robyn says about where Kendra is
from, unless she says "A quaint little Scottish cottage in Jamaica".
AUTHOR'S NOTES: Well, this is a rehashed version of my first fanfic.
I plan to writ the next few parts as soon as I have the time.  This is
what happens when I give in to that little voice in my head which
tells stories.  Unfortunately the voice in my head started arguing
with it's former self and told me that the story had to be redone
completely differently.  It's still far from perfect but it's better
than it was.  Keep in mind that Kendra and Zabuto have thick accents,
though I have left most of the spelling normal in order to understand
what they are saying. [that sounds like dat etc.] Feedback and
constructive criticism would be greatly appreciated.

*****
    Kendra the vampire slayer, was sitting in the cargo hold of an
airplane, thinking about what lay ahead, and about the events which
led to this journey.  Kendra had been training her whole life for one
thing, to slay the vampires.  She was the chosen one...the one girl in
all the world with the strength and skill to fight the vampires...
She had finally got her calling last spring... She automatically knew
when the last slayer had died...she had felt it...and dreamed about
it. That was when the dreams began.  Kendra's first dream was of the
last slayer's death.  In the dream Kendra found herself in the role of
the previous slayer.  She relived the slayer's last moments. The last
slayer had been drained my a Master Vampire, and had fallen
unconscious, face first into a few inches of water.  She had drowned.

    One day Kendra's watcher told her that a great evil was about to
arise in Sunnydale California.  He told her that she was to go to
Sunnydale to try to control the dark forces there.  That was the
reason for this impromptu trip.  In order to keep her identity a
secret, she had concealed herself in the cargo hold of a plane
destined for California.  This was where she was now sitting,
pondering her destiny.

*****
    Coming from a small, superstitious village in Jamaica, Kendra had
known her entire life that she was to be a chosen one.  Her watcher,
Sam Zabuto, had been training her in martial arts, mythical studies,
and slaying tactics since she was a small child.  Kendra's parents had
sent her to Sam Zabuto's village to train when she was very young.
    She could remember clearly the day she asked Zabuto about her
parents.  "I know 'tis me destiny to be a slayer, and that is why I am
with thee, but do I not have parents somewhere?"
    His answer, as always, was cryptic.  "In the past, family has only
distracted the chosen one from her calling.  Thee, and *thee alone,*
must fight the creatures of darkness..."
    "...I know...I just wonder who they were, that is all."
    Sam Zabuto walked slowly over to the old cupboard which Kendra had
never seen unlocked.  She had always wondered what was in there, but
every time as a child in her inquisitive voice she had asked, Zabuto
had made it clear that the contents of the cupboard were to be left
untouched.
    Zabuto extracted an old box from the cupboard, then locked the door
again.  He proceeded to carry the box over to the anxious girl.  "I
knew the time would come for thee to know thy past, I suppose now is
the correct time."  Zabuto carefully handed the box to Kendra, with
only the faintest hint of hesitation.  "Thee will find what thee is
looking for within this box...but remember, thee cannot allow the past
such importance that it will detract thee from thy calling.  It is
important that thy destiny be fulfilled...Do not dwell on the past..."
 With that he exited the room, leaving the child to ponder the meaning
of his words.
    Eventually curiosity got the better of her, so she carefully opened
the box, not knowing what to expect.  As the lid was lifted, the
contents of the box were revealed.  Inside were many papers, a
weathered envelope, and two old leather-bound books.  'Journals',
Kendra thought to herself.
    First she took the envelope out and examined it's contents.  It was
filled with pictures.  Kendra looked at the first, labeled simply 'the
babies.'  It was a photograph of two young children, a boy and a girl,
both approximately two years of age.  The little girl looked
disturbingly familiar, and after careful examination, Kendra realized
the baby was in fact, herself.  "But if that is me, who is the boy?"
Kendra looked at the next picture, this one of what appeared to be a
family.  'My family.' Two young women were seated, one holding an
infant, the other holding the hand of a five year old boy.  Behind
them stood two young men, brothers, identical to one another.  One
held an infant, the other had one hand on the shoulder of a girl of
about eight, the other hand on that of the little boy.  Kendra knew
that she was not the girl, for she had been sent to train with her
watcher when she was four, yet there was a striking family
resemblance.  It took several minutes of shuffling through pictures
before Kendra found one that particularly caught her eye: it was of a
boy and a girl both approximately four years old.  The back of the
photo said: 'The twins fourth birthday."
    Now Kendra was even more confused.  'Twins?  Who are they?
Relatives?  Or could it be that...'  Kendra didn't let herself
continue the thought.  Instead she lifted the first book.  As she
opened it to an arbitrary page, she knew her first assumption had been
correct, it was a journal...or a diary.

        'On May 21st, 1981 Shali and Nuru both had their wishes granted.
Shali wanted the baby to be a girl...so she'd have someone to mother.
Nuru wanted a boy so he'd have someone to play with.  Well Shali got
her wish, a little baby girl for a cousin...and Nuru got his
wished-for cousin too.
    Twins! I could hardy believe it myself...And here I thought the two
children Annalise had were hard enough to handle.  How are we ever
going to deal with twins?
    Zabuto was right, Kendra...that's what we've named her...has the
birthmark of the chosen one.  The same one that I have.  She will one
day become the new slayer.  We'll have to begin her training as soon
as she is old enough.  Kaleb is also a doll.  They are both so alike!
Not only in looks, but in temperament.
    I love being a mother!  And Zabuto said I'd probably never reach
twenty! I turned twenty last week...the oldest slayer on record.  I
just hope I live long enough to see my children grow.
        Carrah,
        May 24th, 1981.'

    Kendra read the page over and over, not believing her eyes.  Her mind
was filled with questions.  'I have a twin brother? ... My mother was
a slayer?...'  She opened the other book, also a journal, but in a
different hand....A chillingly familiar hand...she recognized it as
Zabuto's writing.  'This was one of the watcher journals!  Zabuto must
have been Carrah's watcher!'  Kendra skimmed through the pages until
she reached the last two entries.

        'June, 2nd, 1985,
        My worst fear has been realized.  Carrah is dead.  She, like too
many of her kind, met her fate at the hand of Lothos.  He had her
hypnotized, and she couldn't break free.  It pained me so, to see her
perish.  Lothos was also the one who claimed my grandmother's life.  I
suppose now another slayer will be called.  It will not be Kendra for
she is far too young, but her training must begin soon.  I mustn't let
the child down as I did her mother.  I simply cannot.
    I have spoken to the child's father, he agrees that I must take her
away, keep her from harm until she is ready...until she is called.
She *WILL* be prepared when her turn comes.  I will see to it.  I only
wish I could have better prepared her mother.  Carrah...she insisted
upon pursuing a family.  Well I will not allow Kendra to make the same
mistake.  A family only weakens a slayer.  It distracts her from
carrying out her destiny.
    It pains me to think of separating Kendra from Kaleb and the others
but it must be done. It is for their own good.  The twins should not
have to be separated but there is no other way.
        This is a truly sad time for me.  I shall never forgive myself for
not better preparing Carrah.  I will not make the same mistake twice.
        Carrah, I hope that thee shall have peace now.
                Sam Zabuto.'

    Kendra was twelve then, in the eight years she had lived with Zabuto,
she had learned every available fact about vampires, demons and the
other creatures of night.  She was in excellent physical condition.
Kendra had learned to distance herself from everyone except her
watcher.  She had no contact with her family, though sometimes she was
aware of thoughts invading her own.  She never told Zabuto about them,
but secretly Kendra believed that the voice in her head was that of
her twin brother, Kaleb.

*****
            ...TO BE CONTINUED SOON...

[Yes Windrider I'm right on it.  Have a little patience will you?
It's not like I can work non-stop with a little LGM and LGW vying for
my attention.  Every time I start typing instead of paying attention
to them, they steal my Arrowroots and Sabina uses her powers to make
me start floating in the middle of the room, and then I can't reach
the keyboard until Gollum talks her into letting me down.  Even then,
if I don't play with them right away he'll let her make me float again.]
~ Jeanie :-)




_________________________________________________________
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-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "Andrea Newbery" <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Repercussions, (13/16)
Date: 29 Jun 1998 10:40:12 PDT

Title: Repercussions part 13
Author: Andrea
e-mail: [e-mail]
disclaimer: All charecters used here are the property of Joss Whedon,
Mutant Enemy, the WB, etc. They are not mine.
feedback: Please. Good, bad, whatever.
Thanks: Christine, Rachel and Jenn.


Hell


Xander put one foot in front of the other, slowly moving further into
the darkness.  He stopped suddenly, fear overcoming him. He spun around
hoping to see the room he had just been in waiting behind him, but there
was nothing except blackness. Staring into the darkness, his heart
pounding he reached out, needing to feel it, to know if it was solid.
His hand touched it tentatively, feeling the slimy texture, then harder,
realizing it was solid. Pulling his hand back as if he had touched hot
coals he stood there. He knew he needed to turn, to walk further into
the blackness, but was unable to move, afraid his legs would collapse if
he tried to turn. Breathing deeply he tried to calm his pounding heart.
Slowly turning his body he stared into the darkness. Taking one
tentative step after another he began walking forward again, staring
straight ahead, hoping he didn't see anything.

He stretched his hands out, feeling for walls and was shocked when he
touched the slimy walls almost immediately.  Panicked by the narrowness
of the passage he reached up to see if he had any space above him and
felt the roof only inches above his head. He could hear his breath,
ragged in his ears. The smallness of the passage was choking him, the
sweat running from his forehead. He tried to think only of his goal, all
thoughts of the warnings Whistler had given him disappearing from his
mind. He banged into the wall and realized the path was curving. Holding
his hand out, running it along the wall, using it to guide him through
the turn. The passageway became somewhat lighter, still dark and closed,
but he could make out the walls in the blackness, could see the
dirt-like floors. Realizing his hand was still leaning on the damp
walls, he pulled it away, wiping it on his pants. Walking faster now,
the ability to see the path giving him confidence. Turning another
corner he saw a figure walking toward him. He stopped, looking
frantically around for somewhere to hide, not wanting to face any
demons. He closed his eyes fighting down his panic and opened them to
stare into familiar eyes. He gasped, stepped backwards away from the
figure, his eyes filled with disbelief. The familiar figure smiled
malevolently at him and opening its mouth began to speak, "What, no
happy greeting for your old friend Jesse?"

Xander choked back a small scream, staring at his old friend in horror.
Unable to speak or move he just waited. Jesse looked at him, an evil
glint in his eyes, "Well, I'm happy to see you, my betrayer. I see you
kept it up. Once a betrayer, always a betrayer."

Xander continued staring in horror, not understanding his words.  His
mind filled with pain at the thought that his old friend now resided in
Hell.  Jesse moved in closer, his body towering over Xander. Panicking,
Xander moved backwards, backing into the wall. He stood there trapped as
Jesse began to speak again, "You sent me here, You!"

"No!" The word rushed through Xander's fear, "You fell into a stake. I
didn't do it."

"Before." Jesse spoke softly, his voice chilling, "Before I died. Before
I was turned into a demon. You weren't quick enough. You failed me. You
sentenced me to this."

Xander's mind spun with guilt, he had failed his friend, had held the
stake that ended his existence. He stared at him, the guilt at his
failure evident on his face. He spoke passionately, trying to convince
Jesse of his sincerity; "I tried." His voice was breaking, the guilt
crushing him, "I didn't want you to die. I wanted to save you. I did.
Jesse..."

"Really?" Jesse spoke casually now, "Then why aren't you here to save
me? Why didn't you try to curse me?"

Xander swallowed, his pulse racing, his thoughts incoherent, "I didn't
know the curse. I would have done it to you. I swear I would have." He
was crying now, his words choked out between gasps.

"But you're here to save Angel. You think he deserves to live more than
I do?  I was your best friend. I had just become a demon. I barely even
had a chance to kill." Jesse spit the words at him, the hatred hitting
Xander in the face. "Angel's killed your friends. Tormented you, but
it's him you're taking out of here. While I rot here forever."

"I...I wanted Angel dead." His voice sounded weak to him even, "I...I
don't think he deserves to..."

Interrupting him Jesse continued, "But you're here to save him." Tilting
his head Jesse considered Xander, "Aren't you?"

Xander sputtered, shocked at his words, "I...I...Jesse." His voice
pleading with Jesse to understand. Feeling the walls around him closing
in more tightly, unable to catch his breath he collapsed to the ground.
Laying there, waiting for Jesse's next onslaught to rip through him.
But, nothing. Jesse didn't speak and when he finally looked up he was
alone in the darkness again. Sitting up he pulled his knees to his
chest, sobbing for his friend. His tears finally slowed, his purpose
coming back to him. Jesse was gone, he couldn't save him. Standing
slowly he began to walk further into Hell.

Rounding another bend he began hearing a familiar laughter. He continued
walking, towards the laughter, his panic rising, sweat dripping down his
back. He could see four figures walking towards him, their faces twisted
with laughter, sounding like a pack of wild animals bearing down on him.
They came into view, his four fellow hyenas. Xander's mind was spinning,
they weren't dead. He knew they weren't dead. They weren't really here,
maybe Jesse hadn't been either. They came up to him, surrounded him,
sniffing the air around him, growling as they smelled his fear. Kyle
spoke first, "It's about time you got here." The others nodded and
growled, coming in closer to him. Lance curled his nose, "You shouldn't
have gotten away with what you did. We all paid and you didn't"

"I paid." He wanted to get away from them but was afraid to make any
sudden moves, "You guys are alive. You can't be here."

"No?" They spoke in unison, the word ending in a growl. Kyle licked his
lips, "We all killed a man, you abandoned us. You were too busy trying
to rape your friend to be with us. Now we suffer for that. And you go
on. Betrayer!"

"I was possessed. We all were possessed. It wasn't your fault, what you
did." He spoke quickly, his voice shaky.  His head trying to come to
terms with their words.

"Is that what you tell yourself? So you can look your friends in the
eye?  You tried to destroy Willow with your words, tried to rape Buffy.
You did it, your hands, your words, your desire." Kyle sneered the words
out, his eyes gleaming.

"No. I didn't. I wouldn't." He choked the words out, the memory of his
actions flooding his mind.

"Then why did you try to rape only Buffy? Why not Willow too? If it was
possession, and you had nothing to do with it? Didn't you want Buffy?
Haven't you always wanted Buffy?"

Xander stared at them, his face pleading with them to stop. He couldn't
take this, it was all wrong. It hadn't been that way. He had no control,
he wasn't just acting out his darkest fantasies. He couldn't have been.
The pack slid in even closer to him, growling low in their throats. He
closed his eyes, expecting to feel their teeth tearing at him any
moment. Instead he felt them move away, the growling getting fainter. He
opened his eyes to find himself alone again. He stood still, waiting for
his shaking too calm enough so that he could move. The words Whistler
had spoken finally coming back to him. All his regrets, anything he
feels bad about, twisted and returned to haunt him. Smiling shakily he
spoke the words out loud, "It's not real. It's just Hell twisting
things. It's not real."

He continued walking wishing that it didn't feel so real, that the words
spoken to him weren't still reverberating in his head. He stumbled as he
walked, hitting the wall. He straightened himself, reminded once again
of the narrowness of the passage. He breathed shallowly, trying not to
think of anything at all. He just had to get Angel. Just get him and get
out. He had to do this, for Buffy. Feeling the weight of his mission
again he moved quickly forward, looking only at the floor, not wanting
to meet anymore familiar faces.

 He turned a corner, hearing a low murmur of voices in the distance. He
kept repeating Whistler's words in his head, it's not real, it's
twisted, until he came face to face with a mob of girls, a sea of angry
faces. He almost smiled, what trip to Hell would be complete without
remembering his dabble in the black arts. The mob moved closer, pushing
him backwards and then off his feet. He lay there wondering if you could
be crushed to death by a vision. One girl moved to the front of the mob,
hovering over him she spoke, "Free will is a foreign concept to you,
isn't it Xander?"

Another girl spoke before he could think of anything to say, "Xander
thinks that whatever he wants he should have, and he wanted Cordelia
back. Even if he had to trick her to get her." The mob laughed at that,
a mean laugh. He saw Amy seconds before she spoke, "He blackmailed me
into casting it. I had no choice." The girls were all nodding, one
saying, "Xander doesn't give anyone choices. Look what he did to his
best friends."

 He stared at them, the voices echoing in his head, they were right, he
had taken away their free will, he had taken away Buffy's. He sunk into
himself, guilt for his actions overcoming his knowledge that everything
said was taken and twisted from his own thoughts.  The girls disappeared
slowly, their voices echoing through the narrow passage. He lay there,
unable to get up, to face anymore of his actions. A familiar voice spoke
to him then, "Give me your hand." Opening his eyes, he looked into
Giles' face. Taking the offered hand he let Giles pull him up, unable to
remain quiet in his excitement, "Boy, am I glad to see you. It's rough
in here. How did you figure out what I was doing?" He stopped to catch
his breath, waiting for Giles to answer him.

He could see Giles considering him slowly, his face twisting.  He
watched him, wondering why he didn't speak. Giles leaned in so close to
Xander that he could feel his breath on his face.  Speaking deliberately
Giles whispered, " Don't you ever learn?" Xander felt his jaw drop. What
was this?  He searched Giles eyes, only realizing now how angry they
were. Giles grabbed him by the shoulders and began shaking him, started
to shout, spittle flying from his mouth, "Magic again? You almost killed
Buffy the last time you used the black arts! Are you stupid? Can you not
learn?"

Xander tried to pull away, but Giles' hands held him tight.  Confused by
the magnitude of Giles' anger he tried to explain himself, "But...I'm
here to help Buffy. I'm going to save Angel." Looking hopefully at
Giles. Sure that he would understand why he was doing this. But watching
Giles' face he realized that wasn't going to happen.

Giles' released him, and Xander stepped away from him, his hands rubbing
were Giles had held him. Giles spoke softly again, "Help Buffy? Now you
want to help Buffy? Now? Why now? Cause you've realized there are
consequences for you? It was fine by you when only Buffy and Angel had
to pay. Exactly how selfish are you?" Giles' face was distorted, the man
who had dealt with Ethan returned. Xander shuddered, trying to figure
out how to explain it to him, how to make him understand, "Giles. Angel
killed people. He killed Jenny."

"You imbecile. Angel didn't kill Jenny, the demon did." Giles was
smiling a similar smile to the one Jesse had worn. Xander shut his eyes,
trying to block Giles' voice. He stood quietly, hoping Giles would
disappear like all the others had.

Holding his hands to his face he waited for the next installment of
Giles anger, instead a hand touched his shoulder. He uncovered his eyes,
saw Willow standing in front of him. Immediately he covered his eyes
again, rocking back and forth saying, "It's not real, not real. Willow
is not here." Hearing her voice answer him back, "But I am." His brain
was muddled, the guilt he felt bearing down on him. Taking a deep breath
he opened his eyes, looked into Willows face, jumped when he noticed
Giles standing behind her. He tried to recall Whistler's words, to
remember that this wasn't real, but to have both of them looking at him
with hatred was almost unbearable.

Willow ran her hand over his face, wiping his tears away, her own eyes
glittering, "Why are you crying Xander. Everything has turned out like
you wanted it. Angel is gone, why not leave him gone?  You betrayed us
to get what you wanted. Just like you did when you started with
Cordelia, you betrayed our friendship for her and then, like now, you
were too much of a coward to tell anyone. Pretty impressive. Then when
Cordelia dumped you, you made it even worse.  I almost killed you. I
would have had to live with that, because you were upset about Cordelia.
What if I had lost Oz because of that? And you never apologized, never
tried to make it up. Do you ever think of anyone but yourself?"

Giles was nodding, agreeing with everything she said.  Xander tried to
speak, tried to tell himself it was all in his head, but everything was
true, he couldn't defend himself against this.  Giles stepped closer to
him again, speaking slowly, "She's right you know. You are a coward. And
you're dangerous to everyone around you, Buffy more than most.  What if
we couldn't change her back? What if the world lost a slayer because you
were dumped? She was turned into a rat because of you! And that wasn't
enough for you, no, you had to trick her into sending the man she loved
to Hell. "

"I thought it was best. Giles, you know how hard it was for Buffy to get
the strength to kill him, hope would only have made it harder.  I was
trying to help." Xander talked only to Giles, afraid to even look at
Willow.

"Help?" His body froze hearing Buffy's voice behind him, he waited,
shoulders tense, unable to turn around until she spoke again.  "Help me?
That's the lie you're spewing now? You wanted to help me. Cause having
Angel back wouldn't help me? Come on Xander, tell the truth for once."
Buffy's face was derisive, as she came to stand in front of him, beside
Giles and Willow. They stood in front of him, their disappointment and
disgust apparent with every breath. They were not speaking just staring
at him as he felt himself collapsing under the force of their stare. He
struggled to think of something to say to them, to fix things between
them.

"Well?" Buffy's voice was hard. He stared at her for a long minute then
turned to Willow and Giles, remembering all the things they had gone
through together, all the monsters they had defeated, unable to believe
that it was all over. He didn't even try to check the tears that ran
down his cheeks, as they stared at him with hate in their eyes.
Crumbling slowly, he leaned against a wall, feeling the slime soak
through his shirt. He could feel himself folding, knowing he could never
convince them that he was sorry, but then he heard Whistler's voice in
his head, felt his mind clear. Straightening he looked at Giles,
thinking he should understand if anyone did, Giles had made horrible
mistakes in his youth, mistakes that had cost lives. And Buffy, Buffy
had let her emotions rule her all the time, and she hated him because he
had done the exact same thing. Willow, he looked at her, unable to think
of a single reason why she shouldn't hate him. He had let her down most
of all, let their friendship down.  Speaking only to Willow, his eyes
begging forgiveness, "I'm so sorry, Willow, I shouldn't have hidden
things from you."

"Sorry?" Buffy's voice echoed through Hell.

Giles snickered, "Sorry?"

Willow looked at him, her face changed by the hatred, "Sorry?" Her voice
rose high, "You're sorry? So what. What do you want from it? What good
does it do?"

Xander stared at her, at all of them, his guilt being overtaken by
anger, he had done some things right. Turning to Buffy he spoke, "You'd
be dead if it weren't for me! Remember that?" Turning towards Giles he
spat out, "And you! You'd still be tied up at the mansion!" Speaking
loudly now, he turned to Willow, "And who figured out how to stop the
Judge?" He spoke loudly now, to no one in particular, "I've done things.
Good things. And I'm sorry for the thing I did wrong, but that doesn't
erase everything else. It doesn't erase the friendship we had. I'm
making it up. I'm getting Angel back."

He stopped, breathing heavily, Whistler's words running through his
mind. Turning to the visions of Buffy, Giles and Willow he spoke one
last time, "I made a mistake. I'm fixing it. I am not a horrible
person." They flew at him as he spoke, calling him every vile name he
had ever heard, and many he hadn't. Silently repeating Whistlers words
he stood there, holding his ground. They stopped, realizing he wasn't
reacting, glaring at him they slowly disappeared. He only let himself
relax then, finally believing that they hadn't been real. Running his
hands over his face, trying to erase the memory of the words he had
heard he stumbled off, heading deeper into Hell.

Rounding a corner he heard a low keening. Putting his hands over his
ears he cautiously moved closer to the sound. Seeing a figure in the
distance, kneeling in the dirt, his head in his hands. The sound coming
from him was full of such pain Xander could barely stand to walk closer
to him. But he did, recognizing the shoulders, the hair. Walking slowly
up to him, praying that it was Buffy's Angel, knowing it had to be,
Angelus would never feel this pain.  Stopping by his shoulder he spoke
softly, "Angel?"
*******



______________________________________________________
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From: <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: "Fallen From Grace" (8/11)
Date: 29 Jun 1998 17:19:58 EDT

Notes: Takes place the January or so of Angel's change. E-mail me for missing
pieces. :)
Disclaimers: Blake and the Coordinator, etc, are mine. The rest would appear
to belong to High God Joss.
Distribution: Not without my permission, please.
Feedback: YES! To [e-mail], please, whether it be good or bad or
something in-between.

And now, on to the show!

~
                              Eight

     It was too damn quiet. Just like in those old movies he liked
to watch, Pike thought, where everything went silent about ten
seconds before the monsters jumped through the windows, smashed
everything up, and sent everybody but the hero screaming and
running for the hills.
     Difference being that he had been waiting here in this god-
awful silence for a lot longer than ten seconds, the hero was a
chick, and she was off on some sort of freaky weird-ass thing
beating up the jerk who'd tried to take him out earlier.
     That, and in those movies they didn't usually have an aging
British guy who puttered around libraries during the day and slayed
vampires at night. No, the stock-nerd did perfectly fine for B
movies, and they were usually reasonably young, and when they came
through at the end there was usually a nerd-chick standing around
to start hanging on them, so that both the hero guy and the nerd
guy had somebody they could go home and screw around with.
     Pike sighed. He watched way too many bad movies, he thought,
and he looked up at where Giles was still looking over some funky
big book. He glanced down at his watch. Buffy had been gone for
hours now. It was way long past sunset. She'd ducked out in the
middle of the day, for crying out loud; didn't she have classes? Or
cheerleading, or something, or whatever it was she did when she
wasn't Slaying these days?
     Then again, maybe she knew where that Angel bastard went
during the daytime, and maybe that meant she was gonna be in a
great big fat pile of shit when she wound up getting in a fight
with him, and maybe it'd be for the best if Pike ditched Sir Giles
the Stuffy and went off and tried to pull off a rescue.
     Or maybe, he thought next, he should try some anti-delusion
medication before his head got so big it exploded. Buffy was the
Slayer, not some skinny little hack who didn't know what she was up
against. At least, that was mostly what he was hoping, 'cause if
she wasn't then he was in some seriously deep shit himself. And
he'd hate to think about what might happen if either he or her
Watcher had underestimated her fighting abilities.
     He sighed. Ugh, this was seriously sucking. Glancing up across
the room, he said the first words either he or Stuffy had said in
over an hour. "Can we go after her yet?"
     Stuffy looked up, then glanced at the clock on the wall and
shook his head, taking off his glasses for a moment and using a
tissue to clean them. "I, I think it would be-- be prudent to wait
a bit longer."
     Pike snorted. Prudent. Trust some stuffy British Watcher Guy
to come up with something like _prudent_ when the life of the most
amazing girl in the world might be in jeopardy, and he could go in
and they could have that whole mutual-saving-of-asses thing going
again, which would lead to what had come after the mutual-saving-
of-asses last time, and which would mean he could just have a
really _nice_ trip to Phoenix instead of one that sucked horse
shit.
     *Whoa, Pikey boy, slow the hell _down_, wouldja?* He scolded
himself inwardly, giving no outward sign of the ideas that had
begun running through his head about the same time that he'd had
the thoughts about asses and Buffy within the same sentence.
Distractions, big no-no, especially at a time like this.
     He pushed away from where he'd been leaning against the wall,
moving to start pacing, 'cause sometimes pacing calmed him down
when he was in a severe state of whatever the opposite of calm was,
but he only made it about halfway across the room when Stuffy
looked up again and spoke.
     "If I might ask," Giles asked, and Pike could see whether he
gave permission or not, the question would see the light of day, so
he kept his mouth shut. "Which of Merrick's books did you read?"
     Alright, Pike thought, that was an easy enough question to
answer. "All of 'em," he said with a nonchalant shrug, taking more
than just an iota of satisfaction from the way Stuffy's expression
shifted. *Ah-hah,* he thought, so that explained that one, 'cause
it was obvious that Buffy's opinion of him was shared by this guy,
which wasn't altogether a good thing because he hated when he
started thinking about himself the way he knew Buffy did, but hey,
he was cool and he could deal. Just because she was gonna go all
snotty on him didn't mean he had to worry about it at all, and he
wasn't going to.
     "I...see."
     "What, you're surprised?"
     "Actually," the Watcher admitted, "Yes, I am."
     Pike felt the "defensive" mechanism in his mind fire, and gave
Stuffy a glare. "Yeah, well," he said, "I dunno where you and Buffy
get off being so stuck up about the whole thing. That stuff's not
that hard to understand."
     "It's not that," Giles said, his voice staying quiet.
     "It's not?" Pike frowned. If that wasn't it, then what was?
     "Books of that nature are...rarely left where it might be
possible for someone not in the organization to find them," Giles
replied.
     "Yeah, I know," Pike said. "I read them, remember?"
     The librarian-slash-Watcher shrugged, standing, leaving his
own book behind on the table as he walked across the room to meet
Pike on the open floor. "I was merely, merely suggesting," he said,
stammering in that nervous way he had that had been grating on
Pike's nerves the entire evening, "that you may want to consider
the possibility that you may be fated to, to become, eventually, a
Watcher."
     Pike felt the chuckle, laced with bitterness and a pinch of
anger, bubble up inside him a moment before it burst out and he
laughed in the Watcher's face. "Yeah," he said, when he managed to
get himself scaled back down to just a grin that said "what_ever_"
in the most Valley of ways. Hey, he might not have grown up as one
of them, but he could put on the affectations as well as any other
Gen-Xer. "Right. Me, one of you stuffy jerks who run around
convinced you're gonna save the world by ruining the lives of
teenage girls, one at a time."
     "Excuse me?"
     Pike looked at the Watcher for a moment before it hit him--
he'd actually spoken his personal feelings about what he knew of
the Watcher Network and its mission, aloud, to one of the Watchers
themselves. Not even just _a_ Watcher, no, he'd gone and said it to
_the_ Watcher, the Slayer's Watcher, the one who was supposedly one
of the most important and powerful Watchers in the organization.
     Fuck, he decided, not like it mattered. And so long as he'd
stuck his foot in his mouth once, why not go for swallowing the
entire leg?
     "Wouldn't want any part of it," he told Giles, not bothering
to try to keep the tone of distaste out of his voice. "I mean, you
guys-- look what your side is doing to Buffy. Trying to kill her."
He shook his head. "Thanks, I'll do without."
     The Watcher looked at him for a moment before clearing his
throat and speaking again. "Some of the, the best Watchers in
history have been-- they were what you'd term rogues, I suppose, in
that they, they felt it was unnecessary to follow procedure, to
play by the rules of the Network, so to speak--"
     "Like Merrick," Pike broke in. "He was good. Stretching the
rules. He didn't give a shit about them, he just wanted to see
stuff get done." He shook his head. "Man, you know, he knew his
shit so well he hadn't even taken half of his stuff outta boxes
when I found it." He looked at Giles, and let a faint glimmer of
disapproval into his expression. "Better to know your stuff like
that, inside and out, and not have to be constantly reading, 'cause
you never know when you might need to know something and have no
way to get to your books. You know what I mean?"
     The silence hung heavy in the air for a few seconds after Pike
finished, and he took that as a good sign, 'cause it meant Stuffy
was too thrown off to return the remarks immediately.
     The Watcher looked at him for a moment before clearing his
throat uncomfortably-- Pike took a certain amount of pride in the
fact that he'd been able to discomfit one of these guys-- and
managing a slight, polite smile. "You must care deeply for your
duty to her, then, if you feel so, ah, so strongly."
     Pike raised an eyebrow. "'Scuse me?" he asked, then shook his
head. "Nah, this isn't duty. It's friendship." His eyes narrowed
slightly. "You know, that thing you feel toward people you care
about, who care about you, where you'd do stuff for other people
because you want to know they'll be safe and you don't like the
idea of living your life like a selfish bastard who doesn't care
about it when the girl he's supposed to be watching gets herself
killed." Once again, he realized a second too late, he was probably
overstepping some serious boundaries here. Not like he cared, he
just thought it was kind of a shame that they had to be there when
they were so _easy_ to break.
     The Watcher didn't look too upset, though. No, Pike thought,
a moment before the older man spoke...the way he was looking at
Pike was quite a bit more like a self-satisfied expression. Inner
frown, Pike told himself, a few seconds before Stuffy spoke.
     "Odd," the Watcher said, "to hear that coming from one who has
already taken such an...active role...in fulfilling his own
destiny."
     Pike raised an eyebrow. "'Scuse me?" he asked.
     The Watcher shook his head, returning his attention to his
books. "No, nothing you would be interested in," he said, in the
same tone Pike had heard used on street drug deals, when the dealer
had something he knew the addict wanted, but the addict had just
royally pissed him off.
     Pike sighed. In this case, and any that included Buffy, he was
so far past "addict" that the term itself was a complete and utter
joke. "Look," he said, letting himself walk, slowly, across the
room to where Giles had returned to his big, important, musty
books. "I didn't mean anything by it."
     "No, no, quite alright," the Watcher said, his eyes not
leaving the page.
     Pike glanced downward, but it took only a few seconds for him
to realize that the letters on the page weren't the roman alphabet.
"Come on," he said, in that nagging tone of voice his friends--
when he had them-- told him was the most god-awful way in the world
to talk. "What're you saying about destiny?"
     "Only," the Watcher said in a carefully measured tone, "that
one such as yourself should realize that sometimes, others have no
more choice in their fates than you yourself do."
     Pike frowned and pointed at the book. "Yeah, so what's that
thing got to say about me?"
     "Why would you assume it had anything to do with you at all?"
Giles asked in that stuffy, annoyed tone of voice.
     Pike shrugged. "'Cuz you opened it up and started looking at
it as soon as you told me it was fine. So what's it say about me?"
     The Watcher looked at him for a few long moments, then shook
his head. "I don't know that it would be wise to tell you, at this
point," he said.
     Pike scowled. He knew condescension when he saw it, and this
was definitely it. "No," he said. "I can take it."
     Stuffy shrugged, and glanced down at the stylized writing. "It
says here, if, if I'm interpreting things correctly..." He glanced
up, his expression almost a chilling one. "...'Orphaned and
transplanted, one from her past will come forth and put himself in
her service, a willing slavery forced by circumstance and denial.'"
He glanced at Pike. "And so, it would seem you were...fulfilling
your duty, according to prophesy."
     Pike's eyes narrowed, and he glared at the Watcher. "Aw, fuck
off," he snapped.
     The Watcher gave him a slight, satisfied smile, then turned
back to the books.
     Pike sighed inwardly, angrily. Great. So the jerk dropped a
bombshell like that, not that Pike believed it or anything, and now
they went back to being all quiet and silent again? Wonderful, like
he wasn't already going out of his mind with boredom. Now he could
start worrying about Buffy again, yeah, that would work real well,
lovely. Fun, fun, fun. That, and he got to wonder if he was some
kind of drone to fate's whim. He shot a glare at Giles. Jerk.
     Disgusted, Pike let out a small snort. "Hey," he said across
the room, "can we go yet?"
     The Watcher replied without looking up from his book. "No,"
was his reply.
     Pike sighed, returning his gaze to the floor, forcing his
thoughts away from the stupid book and its stupid prophecy, and
instead to the blonde Slayer who he _wasn't_ out there helping to
defeat the forces of darkness.

~

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-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Reflections 5/7
Date: 29 Jun 1998 17:49:34 EDT

Title~ Reflections 5/7
Author~Shani
Timeline~ letÆs say between Go Fish and Becoming I & II--Becomings will not
happen here
Summary~ Angelus becomes Angel, but has some thinking to do before going to
Buffy...if he decides to go to Buffy at all.
Disclaimer~ The characters of Buffy the Vampire Slayer belong to Joss Whendon,
Mutant Enemy Productions, Kuzui Enterprises, Sandollar Productions, and 20th
Century Fox.  No infringement intended.  Story for entertainment purposes
only.
Feedback~ YES, YES, YES, YES!!  Please send all comments to [e-mail]


    ôWhere the Hell is Angel?ö  Spike snapped.
    ôI donÆt know love.  Oh!  HeÆs magnificent.ö  Drucilla purred.
    Standing in front of them, four vampires worked on stulpting a large statue
of stone and clay.
    ôWill he be ready for tomorrow?ö  Dru asked, turning to look at Spike.
    ôOf couse baby, of course,ö  Spike assured her.  ôæAnd the Slayer shall fall
to this creature of stone.ö
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    ôI have a plan,ö  Buffy declared.
    ôBuffy!  How are you?  Did you sleep well last night?ö  Willow asked her
friend.
    ôThereÆs no time to explain right now,ö  Buffy said as Angel walked into the
library.  No one spoke.  Buffy broke the silence.  ôThe only ways that I can
think of to defeat this stone guy without dying is to either stop Spike and
Dru before they write æemetÆ on his hand, or...use this.ö  She handed Giles a
book.
    ôThis just might work.ö  he mumbled.

    Willow pulled Buffy aside.
    ô*What* is Angel doing here?  During the day?ö  she said quickly.  Taking a
deep breath, she continued, her voice much softer and more gentle.  ôAre, Buff
are you ok?ö
    ôWill, IÆm fine.  Well, Angel and I are fine.  Willow, A-AngelÆs human.ö
Willow froze.  She couldnÆt move.  She had mixed feelings about Angel.  She
wanted him back for Buffy and because he was a good friend...but she didnÆt
know if she could ever see him as Angel and not Angelus again.  Buffy saw the
look on WillowÆs face.  She knew what Willow was thinking.
    ôHe didnÆt do anything.ö she said softly to Willow.  ôIt wasnÆt him.ö  With
that said, Buffy went back to the others.  There was an incredible amount of
tension in the room, but for now, they would have to look past that.  They all
shared a common goal, not getting Buffy killed.







-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "Mark Jones" <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Diaries - 6 - Angel
Date: 29 Jun 1998 18:41:59 +0100

Hi again!
DISCLAIMER:  Not mine.

SUMMARY:  A look in Angel's diary, just before the end of "Surpirse" - so he
is still Angel.

FEEDBACK:  This is VERY important to me!  So please take a few seconds just
to scrawl something down and pass it on to [e-mail]

DIARIES 6 - Angels's Diary.
********************************

Dear Diary
Even though I havenÆt been human for about 800 years, tonight I truly felt
human, I remembered what it was like to have friends who care, to have the
ability to help others, but most importantly to love again.
Last night was the best night of my extremely long kind of life.  I almost
left and lost Buffy, I know it sounds terrible but IÆm glad Dru and SpikesÆ
men are so efficient, they saved me, saved me from the pain and heartache of
losing Buffy, the one girl I love more than anything in the world.
I lead a strange life, I am a vampire, yet I am in love with the Slayer and
I even help her slay vampires.
Although I am happy, the one thing that would make my ôlifeö perfect would
be to become human again.  Then I could be normal, I could go out in the
day, eat normal foods and most importantly I wouldnÆt feel the touch of
guilt that I feel now because I love the Slayer.
Life is so confusing.  Much more different now than the past.  Then there
wasnÆt the fear of getting mugged, shot or murdered.  People didnÆt get
killed in cars, there were no cars.  People were expected to marry very
young.  Women were regarded as second class citizens and certanily not as
Slayers.  I canÆt believe all the changes that have happened, yet what is to
come?  Is there any way of knowing?  What new deadly vampires will emerge?
What will Dru and Spike be like?  What will Buffys friends be like?  What
will I be like?  But most importantly, what will have happened to Buffy???
I couldnÆt bare life without her, I love her.
Angel.
***********

Feedback to [e-mail]





-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: [e-mail]
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Homecoming
Date: 30 Jun 1998 18:53:15 -0400

Title:   Homecoming
Author:  Northlight
email:   [e-mail]
Summary:  Buffy returns to Sunnydale one year after Becoming, Part 2 and
finds something unexpected.
Disclaimer:  They belong to Joss Whedon.

    She was home.  After a year of running, Buffy had finally come back
home.  She hesitated before the school, her emotions swirling wildly out
of control.  Buffy took a deep breath and inched forward.  A second
later she had backed away from the steps which would bring her to the
entrance of the school.

    "Come on, it's Giles!" Buffy reprimanded herself.  "There's nothing to
be worried about."  Even as she spoke, the thought of Jenny's death and
Giles' torture both at the hands of Angelus rose in her mind.  Giles had
never blamed her for what had happened to Jenny nor had he ever
expressed displeasure in her inability to kill Angelus.  But what would
her Watcher think about her running away?

    She had abandoned her duty.  She had abandoned him.  Would Giles be
able to forgive her for the pain and worry that he must have felt after
she had left her life in Sunnydale?

    Buffy smoothed her hair nervously and moved forward again.  This time,
she didn't back away.

    The doors swung open beneath Buffy's hands and she followed the
familiar path towards the library.  The memories of the countless times
she, Willow and Xander had walked together towards the library was
overlaid by the still painful memory of her frantic run back after
meeting with Angelus.

    The thought of the horror she had found waiting for her at the end of
that journey suddenly made Buffy fear for what she would find waiting
for her this time.  Unconsciously, her steps quickened.

    It seemed an eternity before Buffy reached the library.  Her hand
reached out and rested against the door as she steadied herself.  The
familiar sound of quarterstaffs connecting made Buffy step away from the
door in surprise.  'Somebody's training?' Buffy thought incredulously.

    She cautiously moved back to the doors and inched one open.  The sight
which met her eyes was a decidedly unexpected one.

    Giles and a girl were sparring.

    It was enough to send a burst of jealousy racing through Buffy.  That
girl was with *her* Watcher.  In *her* library.  Using *her* equipment!

    'She must be my replacement,' Buffy realized, an odd sense of
disappointment seizing her.  Somehow, Buffy had always thought that
Giles would have been searching for her, waiting for her to come back.
She hadn't thought that he'd find himself another Slayer.

    The dark haired girl brought her staff down, knocking Giles' away from
him.  The force of her blow sent Giles reeling back and tumbling to the
floor.  The girl smiled as Giles brought out a handkerchief and dabbed
at his damp face.

    Buffy's teeth ground together.  Nobody went around knocking her Watcher
down!

    The girl bent down and hoisted Giles to his feet.  He murmured a thanks
before heading out of Buffy's line of sight.  Buffy nudged the door open
wider, trying not to loose sight of him.

    Unfortunately, the motion had drew the other Slayer's attention.  Their
eyes met, and the two girls remained motionless, staring at each other
from across the room.

    Buffy was surprised by the look of hostility which had descended on the
other Slayer's face.  'Keep away' the dark haired girl silently warned
Buffy.

    Buffy bristled at the girl's silent warning, ready to tell her who was
in charge.  And then, the realization struck her.  Giles wasn't her
Watcher any more.  She had given up on her duty and position as Giles'
Slayer when she had run away.

    "You take care of him!" Buffy hissed softly before backing out of the
library.  It was only when she was beyond sight of the library that
Buffy let the tears stream down her face.

***

    April stared at the library door in surprise as it drifted shut.  From
everything Giles had told her about Buffy, she hadn't expected her to
give up so easily.  'I guess she realized that she has no place here
anymore,' April thought.

    'I can't believe that she told *me* to look after Giles!  She's the one
who ditched him because she wasn't tough enough for the job!'  The
thought that despite Buffy's weakness, she was still Giles' Slayer
annoyed April.

    He still thought of his first Slayer.  He still searched for her.  He
still waited for her.  What he didn't seem to recognize was that Buffy
was gone and April was more that willing to take over.

    A momentary pang of uncertainty struck April.  'Should I tell Giles
that Buffy was here?  He'd be thrilled to see her again... And he'd want
her back instead of me...'

    No.  Buffy had lost this when she ran away.  And April wasn't about to
give it up.

    "April?" Giles said softly "I thought I heard something."

    "I didn't," April lied, keeping a cheerful smile on her face.  "Now,
why don't we go research something?"

    Giles looked at the door sadly, "I felt something..."

    "Come on, Giles!" April exclaimed, grabbing her Watcher by the arm and
pulling him away from the door.  "There's nothing out there."

End

http://www.geocities.com/Area51/Lair/7493/buffy.html



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Reflactions 6/7
Date: 30 Jun 1998 21:45:19 EDT

Title~ Reflections 6/7
Author~Shani
Timeline~ letÆs say between Go Fish and Becoming I & II--Becomings will not
happen here
Summary~ Angelus becomes Angel, but has some thinking to do before going to
Buffy...if he decides to go to Buffy at all.
Disclaimer~ The characters of Buffy the Vampire Slayer belong to Joss Whendon,
Mutant Enemy Productions, Kuzui Enterprises, Sandollar Productions, and 20th
Century Fox.  No infringement intended.  Story for entertainment purposes
only.
Feedback~ YES, YES, YES, YES!!  Please send all comments to [e-mail]
Authors Notes--PLEASE read~ In this piece of the story I have used the
mourners Kaddish.  It is a prayer said for the dead by their loved ones.  The
transliteration (pronunciation) is the exact of the accual hebrew.  The
translation is out of a jewish prayer book called a sidur.


    Xander hated Angel from the beginning.  When Angelus took over and went on a
killing spree, Xander hated him even more.  Now that Angel was back, a human
and with Buffy, Xander Harris hated Angel more than he ever had before.

    Cordelia watched Xander.  Every time he looked at Angel he scowled.  What
Cordy couldnÆt figure out is why.  Did Xander hate Angel because Angel loves
Buffy and Buffy loves him back?  If he hadnÆt hated him before he ôturnedö
then she could understand, but this was stupid.  She was being stupid.  Her
boyfriend was jealous of his best friend and her boyfriend.  What did that say
about her relashionship with Xander?  Cordy put those thoughts aside.  For
now, she had to do her part to prepare.  She wanted to do her part to prepare.

    Buffy was tired, she hadnÆt slept very well last night.  She wondered briefly
about what would happen if her mother found out that she was the slayer.
ôSorry mom, canÆt talk now, IÆve gotta go hunt vampires.ö  Right.  It would be
so much easier if her mother knew.  Maybe after all this golam stuff was over
sheÆd talk to Giles about it.  She went back to the book.  , nt  *ThatÆs* what
is written on the hand?  æK, so t is what needs to be erased...Æ

    Angel watched Buffy.  She had stopped reading for a minute and was staring at
the wall.  He wondered what she was thinking.  What went on in a seventeen
year old slayers mind?  That was a question he would never be able to answer.
He wasnÆt quite sure that he wanted to be able to answer that.

    Willow could not believe that they were going to go through with this.  If it
would save Buffy then it was worth it.  The question was, would it save Buffy?
Willow had almost lost Buffy too many times, she wouldnÆt let this be the last
time they worked on stopping evil together.  Angel wouldnÆt let Buffy die.
Xander wouldnÆt let Buffy die.  Giles wouldnÆt let Buffy die.  And she
wouldnÆt let Buffy die either.  Now that she had worked up some confidence,
she continued her part of the plan.

    Oz was proud of Willow.  She was very brave.  From his observations, none of
the people in the room would handle BuffyÆs death very well.  Hopefully, he
wouldnÆt find out how everyone got along without Buffy for a long, long time.

    ôItÆs time, Buffy.ö  Giles said slowly.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    Buffy ran alone along the streets of Sunnydale towards the warehouse.  She
hoped that she wasnÆt too late.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    ôAre you ready?ö  Dru asked, getting excited.
    ôSoon.ö  Spike said, an evil grin spread across his face.  ôSoon.ö
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    Spike and Dru were not yet ready to bring the golam to life.  It stood
ungaurded as Buffy slipped into the main room of the warehouse.  She snuck up
to the golam and wrote the hebrew letters on itÆs left hand.
    t aleph
]    n  mem
    ,  tuff
    The stone man began to shake, but before it could cause harm, Buffy erased
the letter Aleph.  The golam crumbled to dust.  Buffy was startled by this
response, in result she fell on the pile of dust that was once a golam.  She
hit her head slightly and was getting a headache but she would have to
continue anyway.  Behind her, she heard the sounds of fighting.  The others
would cover her while she performed the prayer for the dead, well, she hoped
they could cover her.
    She looked at the book in front of her for a moment.  At the top of the page
was the hebrew.  In the middle of the page was the transliteration.  At the
bottom of the page was the translation of the hebrew text into english.
     ôYis-ga-dal vÆyis-ka-dash shÆmay ra-ba.  BÆol-ma dee-vÆra hir u-say, vÆyam-
leeh mal-hu-say.  BÆha-yay-hon uv-yo-may-hon, uv-ha-yay dÆhol bays yis-ro-ayl.
Ba-a-go-la u-vizÆman ko-reev, vÆim-ru a-mayn.
    YÆhay shÆmay ra-ba mÆvo-rah, lÆo-lam ul-ol-may al-ma-ya.
    Yis-ba-rah vÆyish-ta-bah, vÆyis-po-ar vÆyis-ro-mam.  VÆyis-na-say vÆyis-ha-
dar, vÆyis-a-leh, vÆyis-ha-lal shÆmay dÆkud-sha bÆrih hu;
    LÆay-lo min kol bir-ho-so vÆshee-ro-so.  Tush-bÆho-sa vÆne-heh-mo-sa, da-a-
mee-ron bÆol-mo.  VÆim-ru o-mayn.
    YÆhay shÆlo-mo ra-ba min shÆma-ya.  VÆha-yeem a-lay-nu vÆal kol yis-ra-ayl
vÆim-ru a-mayn.
    O-se sha-lom bim-ro-mov hu ya-a-se sha-lom o-lay-nu vÆal kol yis-ra-ayl vÆim-
ru o-mayn.ö  Buffy said, completing the hebrew part.  She continued.
    ôMagnified and sanctified be the name of God throughout the world which He
hath created according to His will.  May He establish His kingdom during the
days of your life and during the life of all the house of Israel, speedily,
yea, soon; and say ye, Amen.
    May His great name be blessed for ever and ever.
    Exalted and honored be the name of the Holy One, blessed be He, whose glory
transcends, yea, is beyond all praises, hymns and blessings that man can
render unto Him; and say ye, Amen.
    May there be abundant peace from heaven, and life for us and for all Israel;
and say ye, Amen.
    May He who establisheth peace in the heavens, grant peace unto us and unto
all Israel; and say ye, Amen.ö  Buffy finished.
    The pile of dust the had been the golam began to glow.  The glowing light
spread and soon surrounded everything in the room.

    Buffy awoke, finding herself in the warehouse.  She wondered how much time
had gone by.  The light was gone and so was everyone that had been in the
room.  All that remained was a small white flower, lying in the spot that once
belonged to the golam.  She picked up the flower and stood.  Feeling light
headed she slowly made her way out of the warehouse and into the light of the
morning sun.





-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: [e-mail] (Charity C. T.)
Subject: BUFFYFIC: (2/?) In Opacitatem Habitant Modo
Date: 30 Jun 1998 20:06:55 -0700

TITLE: In Opacitatem Habitant Modo #2 Giles
AUTHOR: Taygeta
E-MAIL: [e-mail]
FEEDBACK:  Please with a cherry on top!
DISTRIBUTION: Sure, just tell me first.
RATING: PG-13
DESCRIPTION: Buffy is blind, various POVs
DISCLAIMER:  The characters any such reference to Buffy the Vampire
Slayer television series belong to their creator, Joss Whedon, and their
owners, Mutant Enemy productions, Kuzui Productions, Sanddollar
Productions, and 20th Century Fox. In other words, they do not belong to
me.  Copyright infringement not intended.

*****************************

*****************
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

- Dylan Thomas, Do Not Go Gentle into That Good Night

*****************

In Opacitatem Habitant Modo
#2 Giles
By: Taygeta

    She's my responsibility.  She's the slayer, and I, as her
Watcher, am suppose to protect her.  I failed.  I couldn't stop them from
taking her eyes, those vile creatures had locked me away from
everythingàlocked me in a tiny room, dark and dank, with a putrid odor of
blood and rotting flesh that clung to the stale air.

    There were no windows, and the door that trapped me into the
repulsive abode leaked only a tiny stream of light at its base.  That
light was enough to keep my thoughts alignedàto keep my mind intact.
That light alone distinguished the division between the sanctity of the
sane and that of the hell of the mad.

    It is recalling my time spent thereàhours that seemed like days
and weeks on endàdo I question her strengthàdo I wonder if the
determination she displays goes beyond that a slayer gains when they are
chosen.  These questions have always lingered in my mind, but now, more
than ever as I watch her train despite her handicaps.

    How can faith and strength be found when one is locked in a dark
worldàwithout a light to guide them?  I was only in that confounded room
for a few hours with the hope and the knowledge that I would be rescued,
but there is no rescue for her and her eyes.  Yet, she continues to fight
the battle between good and evil, now, with more aggression and will than
did she ever express before.

    The word, revenge, has come to mind a few times.  I know the
feeling of wantàthe desire to overtake that which hurt meàall this I
experienced when I lost Jennyàall this I experienced, again, when I
thought I was going to lose Buffy.  But if this were the case, I fear
more for her than I ever did before.  Revenge is one of the fiercest
forms of animosity, and that ferociousness flickered in eyes as animated,
as they were blind.

    "BuffyàI do believe that's quite enough for today," I interjected
as I noticed that she had been training for the past hour.

    She turned from the punching bag to face the direction of my
voice, "Gilesàthis is not enoughàI'm not ready for anything.  If they
were to attack, I don't even think I'll be able to react."

    Sighing, I approached her, "I know you want to fight themàto end
all of thisàand I do believe that much of that anger is from what they
did to you and what you want to do to them.  Revengeàthat's what you
want, isn't it Buffy?  To fight those bloody demons that did this to
youàto your lifeàto your sight?"

    She closed her eyes and took a deep breath, as she was heavily
perspiring, it was difficult to tell whether any tears were left in her
obsolete eyes, but they were there.  Her eyes opened to reveal watered
lashes and her continuous blinking was evident of her efforts to harness
such expressions of grief.  "Giles, as far as I know, I'm never going to
get betteràmy eyes, what *she* did to themàthey're never going to work
ever again.  I can feel themàthey're thereà  I wake up in the morning, to
the darkness I saw at night, and no matter how many days and weeks it has
been since they almost won, I still ask myself, 'Why won't they work?
Why can't I see?'" and as her voice cracked as her restrain gave way and
thus tears spilt on her young, flushed cheeks as she looked up at meàas
if she saw me, "Gilesàw-w-why me?"

    I took the crying childàchildànot slayerànot responsible young
girlàbut a child who had too much on her shoulders that knew too much of
the unknown realmàinto my arms.  No matter the strength she held in her
handsàno matter the power that had been bestowed upon heràshe was truly a
fragile little girl scared with the knowledge of the dark world.  Her
tiny form shook with tears that she had not dare to shed in my presence
until now, and hearing her sobs and seeing only the tiniest fraction of
unbelievable pain, the vows of rancor I had made previously seemed to
falter somehow.  No amount of malevolence on my part would assist Buffy
in her future battle; she did not need me to add to that.  She needed me
to be, Giles, her Watcher, of whom sheà*they*àmade me learn to be.

    They are, indeed, my family, and I'll be damned if I was going to
let anyone mess with my family.


_____________________________________________________________________
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-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: "Fallen From Grace" (9/11)
Date: 01 Jul 1998 00:18:28 EDT

Notes: Takes place the January or so of Angel's change. E-mail me for missing
pieces. :)
Disclaimers: Blake and the Coordinator, etc, are mine. The rest would appear
to belong to High God Joss.
Distribution: Not without my permission, please.
Feedback: YES! To [e-mail], please, whether it be good or bad or
something in-between.

And now, on to the show!

~

                              Nine

     "It's been four hours," Pike said, moving toward the library
door. "I'm going to get her."
     From where he was sitting, hunched over his books, Giles shook
his head. "I don't believe that would be in anyone's best
interests," he said stiffly. His initial anger at Pike's insults
had melted away a few hours ago, and now all that was left was a
desire to make the young fool realize just what it was he was
dealing with here. He was suffering from something that seemed to
affect anyone who became involved in affairs such as these-- Giles
himself had been susceptible to it at first. The problem was, of
course, the idea that just because one was fighting for what was
good and just and right, one would necessarily survive every
encounter with evil. It was something that both Willow and Xander
had been quick to overcome, and Buffy had accepted it long before
she had arrived in Sunnydale. Giles had, of course, assumed that
Pike would not think himself the invincible sidekick. It seemed he
had assumed wrong.
     "Yeah, well," Pike snapped, rounding back toward him, "in your
opinion, all that'd be in her best interests would be for us to
stay here and you to read those books and me to slowly lose my
mind!"
     Slowly, ever so slowly, Giles let his eyes drift off the
portion of the Codex he had been looking through for the past few
hours, and fixed a cold glare on the interloper. "And in yours," he
shot back, "the best course of action would be to rush into
Angelus' haven, stakes drawn, ready for some sort of massive heroic
action that would stand a better chance of getting everyone
involved killed than it would of offering any sort of actual
_assistance_!" It wasn't until he finished that Giles realizes how
loud his voice was, and how well it would carry in the school. Even
though it was after hours, that didn't mean the building would be
empty.
     Pike looked at him for a few long seconds, motionless, before
flipping him off and stalking out of the library, leaving the doors
swinging behind him.
     Surprised by the reaction, Giles sat motionless for a few
seconds before realizing it would probably be best for him to
follow the young man and make sure he stayed out of the way during
the fight, if there was a fight, which there would almost
definitely be at some point or another before the night came to a
close.
                                *
     Funny, Buffy let herself think, how far she had come since the
early days of her Slaying career. When Pike had first known her,
she had been scared to death of everything around her. She'd
assumed, in almost every situation, that somebody else would come
and bail her out. Her parents, her friends, her Watcher--
     There was a bitter thought, if ever there were such a thing.
She had assumed Merrick was there to bail her out, always, and when
things had turned out to move in quite another direction, she had
been unprepared. And so he had died.
     She shoved that thought away as she stepped over the threshold
of the mansion Angelus' directions had guided her to. Angelus, she
thought with a mental curse, and his damned games. She had arrived
at his apartment, and on the door she had found the first of a
series of notes-- he was in the mood for a game, the letters said,
and she was the one who was going to play them with him. Clues were
scattered about, and when she got to the end of the line, she would
find a prize.
     It was four in the morning. If this wasn't the end of the
line, Buffy had a good mind to forgo clever chit-chat when she saw
the bastard, and simply rip his wise-ass head off.
     She walked forward into the garden room, the place feeling
eerily inhabited so late at night. She shivered, once, wondering
what would happen if it turned out that Angelus was here, or if the
same were true of Drusilla. Spike, she wasn't worried about. He was
still confined to that wheelchair. She hid a small grin at that
thought, raising a small penlight and moving it around the room,
looking for whatever the next clue-- or whatever unpleasant prize
Angelus might have cooked up.
     When she saw it, she nearly dropped the light. Fighting the
urge to throw up whatever was left of the cafeteria lunch she'd had
earlier in the day, Buffy moved a little closer-- close enough to
make out the tweed suit this...person...had been wearing, and close
enough to get a good, long look at just what it was that one could
find in a human skull if one bashed it in far enough.
     "Sick, ain't it?" came a voice from behind her.
     Turning her back on the corpse, Buffy whirled to see Spike,
watching her. Sitting in his wheelchair, hands on the wheels,
smirking at her. "Disgusting," she snapped. "Where's Angel."
     Spike made a half-snorting sound. "You honestly think I'd just
up an'--" he gave a half-laugh, looking genuinely amused, "--an'
bloomin' _tell_ you?"
     Buffy felt her brow furrow, realizing he had a point. "Well,
I guess that would be asking a lot--"
     "Not really," he said with a shrug, the humor abruptly fading
from his expression. "Th'bloody sonuvabitch went to that club've
yours."
     Buffy raised an eyebrow. "Ex-- excuse me?" she asked. Had
Spike just..._told_ her? Freely?
     The vampire master shrugged. "Kick the bastard's bloody ass,
more's the power to you," he muttered, his arms making a few quick
movements to turn the direction of the chair.
     Buffy stared.
     Oblivious to her, Spike turned his wheelchair and rolled off
down the hallway.
     A few seconds later, deciding it was better to take the help
fate dropped into her lap when she could than to sit there and
wonder what the hell had just happened, Buffy left the body in the
garden and took off in the direction of the Bronze.
                                *
     He fell out of nowhere, knocking Buffy to the pavement and
sending her stake and flashlight skittering across the sidewalk and
into the side of the closest building. Swearing at herself for
being so careless, Buffy immediately started struggling, doing her
best to get out of Angelus' grip.
     He laughed, getting off her and letting her go with a backward
shove, then glowering at her. "You're losing your edge," he said
with a grin. "S'that why they're trying to get rid of you?"
     Buffy's eyes narrowed even as she searched her peripheral
vision for her flashlight and stake. The light had been out, a
decision that had seemed wise at the time she'd made it and was
seeming less so with each passing second.
     Shaking his head, Angel laughed slightly. "Did you like the
present I left for you?"
     The body, she realized, suppressing an inward shudder of
disgust at the state it had been in. "Yeah," she said. "You really
know how to give a girl a warm fuzzy, you know that?"
     He shrugged. "I try," he said with a devious grin, taking a
few more steps away and stopping to pick something up from the
shadows. "What's this..." He straightened, and Buffy felt her heart
sink. "You drop this?" Angelus asked, his voice full of feigned
innocence as he held the stake up. He shook his head. "Not
something you should be playing with, around me. It's just, well,
that kind of thing doesn't give _me_ a 'warm fuzzy', as you put
it." With a sudden flick of the wrist, Angel threw the stake over
his shoulder, back further into the shadows, where it was
completely out of reach.
     She gave him a sardonic look, shaking her head. "If you think
making _you_ feel good appears anywhere on the list of things I
wanna do this week, you're crazy," she snapped.
     With a frown, the vampire took a few steps back toward her.
"Well," he shrugged, "you're doing it anyway." He gave her a
sidelong smile. "Had a great time messing around with that new
friend of yours."
     Suddenly remembering the specific reason she had come out
looking for Angel tonight, Buffy's expression hardened. "Stay the
hell away from Pike," she snapped. "You wanna duke it out with me,
then go through _me_-- the torment-by-proxy thing is getting
seriously stale."
     "I'm wounded," Angel said with mock melodrama, putting his
hand over the place his heart supposedly rested. If, Buffy
reflected, it hadn't been sucked out with everything else human
about him when he had-- when he'd changed. "And here I thought me
and your new boy-toy could shoot the breeze for a while without you
going all possessive-psycho-bitch on me." He grinned. "Maybe I just
wanted to make sure he was good enough for you, lover, you think of
that?"
     With a snort, Buffy caught sight of a pile of crates across
the alley. "You're full of shit," she snapped, glaring at him.
     Angel shrugged. "Eh, it was worth a try." Then he shook his
head. "But you wanna be nasty, we can be nasty." He took a few
steps toward her, and Buffy braced herself for an attack, shifting
her weight so she would be all the more ready to launch herself at
him when he came at her.
     The attack never happened. She wasn't sure of what was going
on, but one second Angel appeared set to attack, and the next he
was doubled over and gasping in pain. Buffy's eyes shifted view to
the person standing behind him, and she felt terror and relief
springing into the equation of her emotions when she saw who was
standing there.
     Holding the flashlight Giles kept in his office, the long-
handled steel job that Xander had often joked would be of more use
as a blunt object with which to fend off football jocks than a
lantern to guide Buffy's way through darkness, was Pike. Staring
down at Angel, glaring, poised to strike again.
     But as she glanced at the vampire, Buffy realized there simply
wasn't time to take Angelus down, not with Pike right here. "Let's
go," she said, crossing to him and grabbing his arm, then moving to
jerk him away.
     "Hold on a sec," Pike said, his tone almost one of confusion.
Then he offered her a slight grin, nodding toward Angelus. "Aren't
we gonna stake this motherfuckin' bastard?"
     Buffy shook her head. "No time. Come on."
     Angel's groans were slowly becoming softer.
     Pike looked at her, then back to the vampire. "One more hit,
then," he said, a few seconds before he turned and smashed the
heavy flashlight down on the small of Angel's back again. Buffy was
surprised at the wince that took her over at the sound of the
impact, when Angel moaned sharply. But some small part of her took
a certain amount of satisfaction at seeing Pike cream the son of a
bitch. Finished with his beating, Pike grinned and turned to her
"Nobody tries to _eat_ me and gets away with it," he quipped, then
he nodded. "Let's beat it, then."
     She nodded, grabbing his arm as they both took off, and hardly
noticed when Pike let the flashlight drop so they could run even
faster.

~

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