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- Newsgroups: alt.support
- Path: sparky!uunet!snorkelwacker.mit.edu!bloom-picayune.mit.edu!athena.mit.edu!samn
- From: samn@athena.mit.edu (Valerie Samn)
- Subject: Mom at College
- Message-ID: <1992Aug31.152625.29626@athena.mit.edu>
- Sender: news@athena.mit.edu (News system)
- Nntp-Posting-Host: w20-575-48.mit.edu
- Organization: Massachusetts Institute of Technology
- Date: Mon, 31 Aug 1992 15:26:25 GMT
- Lines: 36
-
-
- My mom called yesterday and said that she was leaving my father and she was
- coming in to Boston, from Texas, today. I would be experiencing the emotional
- trauma involved with this except that there are other things that need to to be
- taken care of . . . such as where she's going to live after she's kicked out of
- my dorm room, how she's going to get a job when she hasn't had a job for over 24
- years, how she's going to manage living by herself (if at all . . . if not, that
- will be a scary thing for me) and how she will make friends . . . she doesn't
- have any hobbies or interests, which leaves group therapy as an option except
- that she doesn't believe in counseling (actually, she has a great adversion to
- counseling). She doesn't seem to have ever trusted anyone outside of her
- immediate family (thus she is not going to live with her mother and brother
- in California) and seems to be able to take offense in almost anything and thus
- believes that everyone intends to hurt her in some way.
-
- Furthermore, i don't know how long i can take having my mother around watching
- everything i do and making bad comments about all of my friends (to this day
- i can't think of a single friend of mine whom my mother actually *likes* . . . )
- while living in the same building with them. i depend highly on my friends to
- keep me sane and to help me through problems, and my mother would not
- approve of my trusting others . . . .
-
- meanwhile, i do not know how long i can take being the sole emotional support
- for my mother . . . it is very tiring and i am not up to it now . . .
-
- i want to convince her that people are good and that they will help and it is
- not a bad thing to ask for help but that seems to be difficult as she thinks of
- helping people as "repaying a debt" . . . . i hate help in the form of
- 'payment' . . . i like helping people and she tells me i waste my time in doing
- so and she says that i shouldn't accept help either because then i will owe someone
- something for life . . . . and now she will be independent, or dependent on
- me, whichever i can accomplish . . . .
-
- thanks for listening . . .
-
- -v
-