home *** CD-ROM | disk | FTP | other *** search
- Path: sparky!uunet!europa.eng.gtefsd.com!paladin.american.edu!howland.reston.ans.net!spool.mu.edu!uwm.edu!csd4.csd.uwm.edu!bearcub
- From: bearcub@csd4.csd.uwm.edu (Bob Koenig)
- Newsgroups: soc.motss
- Subject: Re: Best Response? (Was Tips for coming out to friends?)
- Date: 27 Jan 1993 21:13:38 GMT
- Organization: University of Wisconsin - Milwaukee
- Lines: 77
- Message-ID: <1k6tu2INN96o@uwm.edu>
- References: <1993Jan27.185703.3963@spdcc.com>
- Reply-To: bearcub@csd4.csd.uwm.edu
- NNTP-Posting-Host: 129.89.7.4
- Originator: bearcub@csd4.csd.uwm.edu
-
- >
- > What respnse do you want to hear from your friends when you do come
- > out to them?
- >
- > In reply to one such revelation, my response was "I kind of thought
- > that was what you were going to say", but that was to someone who had
- > asked me to go to lunch with hime because he had something very
- > important that he wanted to tell me.
- >
- > In at least one other case, I was so surprised that all I could manage
- > was "Oh, that's nice". Now that was a truly insipid response; I mean,
- > "nice"? At least I didn't say "Really?" or "Are you sure?", but I
- > certainly could have done better than "nice". (Maybe "groovy" or "way
- > cool"?)
- >
- > So what's the best response you've gotten to a direct coming-out? To
- > an oblique one? The funniest?
-
- I had a great reaction from pretty much everyone I have come out to.
-
- The best story about it goes as follows:
-
- My best friend, my best female friend, and her younger sister were
-
- sitting at her house pondering what to do, and just generally gossiping
- and talking. We were discussing the game "Skeletons In The Closet", which
- is just a form of Truth Or Dare, but it's all truth questions.....
- Needless to say, we all had our opinions about the game and its
- Needless to say, we all had our opinions about the game and its
-
-
- possible negative effects. We all decided to play a game of it, by just
- taking turns asking each other *very* intimate questions. My best friend,
- sort of didn't want to play, but decided to stay in the room anyway.
- The questions went around, and started to get sexual. Jenni, who is
-
- my best female friend, asked her sister a question. When she was done,
- Her sister asked me, "Have you ever been fucked?" (That was her exact wording
- ....if she assumed I was straight she would have probably asked, "Have you
- fucked?")
-
- I said yes, which opened the eyes to all in the room. Everybody
-
- thought I was a "virgin". Rachel blurted out "Who??" to which I replied,
- "Ahaha. That's another question..."
- The questioning went around and my heart started pounding thru
-
- my chest and the tension filled the room. Everybody wanted to know who
- I had lost it to. It came back to me. "Who'd ya fuck?", asked Rachel. Everyone
- zoomed in on me.
- For the next two hours I had explained the whole story and came out
-
-
- zoomed in on me.
- For the next 2 and a half hours, I proceeded to come out of the closet
- to the three others. The women were very excited for me and happy to see
- that I was so in love. Dan was pretty silent. It worried me a little. It was
- easier than I imagined, and it felt like a ton a bricks fell off my
- shoulders. Dan offered me a ride home.
- We stepped outside and he calmly said to me,
-
- "I'm proud of you. It took a lotta guts to do it."
-
- Since then we've been closer and better friends than we had in the past.
- No one got hurt and everyone cared. And still cares. My friend Dan thinks
- its fun to hear me talk about men. He listens to me and learns more about
- it. I reassure him that he doesn't have to hear what he doesn't want to
- hear.
-
-
-
- Bearcub
- --
- ========================bearcub@csd4.csd.uwm.edu==========================
- < B1/B2 c+(+!) g f k(+)? w s- <---Newly revised bear codes of me >
- < Freddie Mercury and Big Bossman's Love Child >
- ==========================================================================
-