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- From: SCP23007@NOVELL1.RTC-CARLOW.IE (Wayne Horan)
- Newsgroups: bit.listserv.cinema-l
- Subject: Sequelmania!
- Message-ID: <MAILQUEUE-101.930126111837.576@novell1.rtc-carlow.ie>
- Date: 26 Jan 93 15:05:01 GMT
- Sender: Discussions on all forms of Cinema <CINEMA-L@AUVM.BITNET>
- Reply-To: SCP23007@novell1.rtc-carlow.ie
- Lines: 38
- Comments: Gated by NETNEWS@AUVM.AMERICAN.EDU
- X-Mailer: Pegasus Mail v2.3 (R2).
-
- How about these for long overdue eagerly anticipated sequels..?
-
- HOME ALONE 3: (without Macauley Culkin, as his parents refused to
- accept the paltry sum of $10 million) Set 7 years on with Leonardo
- DiCaprio/Mark-Paul Gosselar/Steven Dorff (Delete as applicable) in
- title role as Kevin MacAllister. Kevin goes to college, but on the
- last day of term, he oversleeps, waking up to find the college
- deserted and locked. (Cue hands on cheeks pose as he dashes around
- frantically looking for someone). Meanwhile the sticky bandits have
- been released from prison, and have decided to better themselves by
- enrolling in college as mature students. However, lack of study means
- they decide to break into the college to steal the term papers and
- it's up to Kevin to stop them (ho-hum). Additional casting: Mayim
- Bialik as Kevins love interest (Yikes!) and Tori Spelling as the girl
- Kevin fancies (Yum!). Special apperance by John Candy as a tubby yet
- likeable caretaker.
-
- EDWARD SCISSORHANDS II: In which Edward finds his long lost twin
- brother (Robert Smith from the Cure) who reveals that Edward was not
- invented by Vincent Price, but is really the son of teen slasher,
- Freddy Kruger, whose untimely demise means that Edward is requested
- to give up his nice ways and carry on the family business. Expect a
- hefty lawsuit from New Line Cinema.
-
- JFK 2: In a four hour "special", Kevin Costner forgets his "Just For
- Men" grey hair cover up and manages to look earnest between more
- grainy black and white footage, which leaves cinema goers even more
- confused until a special shock ending reveals that Macauley Culkin
- was responsible for the assination. Special appearance by Bill "Will"
- Clinton as JFK. (The resemblance is uncanny)
-
- THE ADDAMS FAMILY 2: Gomez and Morticia give birth to a new son,
- Pubert, and hire a Rebecca DeMornez type of nanny (played by Joan
- Cusack) who falls in love with Uncle Fester after she sees him in his
- new wig, and they get married (The director of "The Addams
- Family 2" writes: "Hey, this plot is supposed to be a secret!")
-
- OOPS! sorry, I think I'll cease my so-called "sequel predictions"!
-