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- Newsgroups: soc.bi
- Path: sparky!uunet!cis.ohio-state.edu!zaphod.mps.ohio-state.edu!darwin.sura.net!news.udel.edu!ravel.udel.edu!seamus
- From: seamus@ravel.udel.edu (James G Dilmore)
- Subject: Re: A hug request and a general growl at the world
- Message-ID: <C0Hw51.6DG@news.udel.edu>
- Sender: usenet@news.udel.edu
- Nntp-Posting-Host: ravel.udel.edu
- Organization: University of Delaware
- References: <1993Jan6.054813.19378@udel.edu> <C0F82s.MnG@news.udel.edu> <1993Jan6.172324.4416@vpnet.chi.il.us>
- Date: Thu, 7 Jan 1993 17:48:36 GMT
- Lines: 76
-
- In article <1993Jan6.172324.4416@vpnet.chi.il.us> orc@vpnet.chi.il.us (david parsons) writes:
- >In article <C0F82s.MnG@news.udel.edu> seamus@ravel.udel.edu (James G Dilmore) writes:
- >|I like the label of bisexuality because to me it represents the
- >|closest position to the rejection of artificial distinctions as I can get.
- >|But yet with it I can still find an identity and a community. I think that
- >|the labels of het, gay, bi and such are intrinsically false and that they
- >|needn't exist if the above conditions prevailed.
- >
- > They describe behavior and/or orientation, and thus are
- >perfectly accurate. They may not be very precise; bisexual applies
-
- But it is also an identity. This identity carries may society-deemed
- "essential" characteristics. In your sense sure they are right and useful.
- but there are hetboys who have had repeated motss experiences.
- This are also bi folk who have had only het experiences (dammit).
- The labels are certainly not true in these cases. I think that the
- baggage involved with any label makes the label inaccurate. Especially
- dealing with such a subjective topic as sexuality.
-
- >to me, a Kinsey 1/4(*), just as it would describe a Kinsey 3/3 or a
- >Kinsey 5/5. Use it as a part of a winnowing process to describe
- >someone - it helps resolve your image of that person.
- >
- That I like alot. Just because of its indeterminateness. I have
- seen other sexual scales which are a bit more topological with more
- levels and dimensions.
-
- >(* theoretical Kinsey 1, experimental Kinsey 4)
- >
- I am about your compliment there. :)
-
- > If you don't use the labels het, gay, or bi, what then will be
- >used? It's a wonderful shorthand, so we don't have to spend all day
-
- Good point. It is useful. But it is not always representative.
-
- >describing ourselves. Take a look at this description of myself,
- >with the common labels and without:
- >
- > [Labels] Orc: a promiscuous bisexual bottom
- > [Without] Orc: I sleep around, a lot, almost exclusively with
- > friends <pickups and casual flings are okay, but
- > dangerous emotionally, and I don't do them if my brain
- > is working>, and most of them at long distances from
- > where I live. I am mainly sexually and emotionally
- > attracted to women, sometimes more than I'd like to be,
- > but I do respond quite well sexually to men, and very
- > rarely emotionally. I'm into pain, but only when it's
- > inflicted in a sexual situation, and only when it's
- > inflicted by the person topping me <this means no
- > whips, clamps, and all those other fun things that seem
- > to be part and parcel of Classic S&M (tm)> and I don't
- > do submission, and fight like mad when I'm tied down.
- >
- Does drool hurt keyboards? :)
-
- > The second description is a better one, by a long shot. But
- >it takes 15 minutes to relate. I can casually describe myself with
- >the labels very quickly, and then relate the gory details at my
- >leisure. (In this context, not wishing to use labels is a way of
- >labelling yourself; as what, I'll leave up to you, but not in
- >casual discussion because I'd like to get some sleep today!)
- >
- I believe that the only true way to know anything is through
- direct experience. Yes that is an invitation.
-
- > ____
- > david parsons \bi/ pedantic e-slut
- > \/
-
-
- --
- Jim Dilmore - seamus@brahms.udel.edu or dilmore@che.udel.edu
- Deconstruct your Gender Safe sex doesn't mean no sex.
- Give me life, Give me pain, It just means use your imagination.
- Give me myself again. Tori Amos. Billy Bragg
-