Cryonic suspension is a method of preserving the bodies of very rich dead people so that, if ever medical science advances to the point at which immortal life can be achieved, they can be revived and made to live eternally.
Uncle Charly's been put away
Glory be! Glory be!
Uncle Charly is here to stay
Jubilee!
His widow Aunt Annabel scarcely grieves
Glory be! Glory be!
That he's really immortal she really believes
Jubilee!
She's packed him off with a final kiss
Glory be! Glory be!
She'll follow him soon in cryonic bliss
Jubilee!
He hangs from a wire in a plastic bag
Glory be! Glory be!
With his name and his age on a plastic tag
For all to see!
At minus a hundred and ninety-six
Scale of C. Scale of C.
They really believe he will cheat the Styx
Jubilee!
But the beneficiaries of his will
Sad like me. Sad like me.
Have got to swallow this bitter pill
Oh sad to see.
For it cost a hundred and seventy thousand quid
Oh woe is me! Woe is me!
Eternal life for to make his bid
Not Jubilee!
And there comes to my mind a lingering doubt
Doubt is there. Doubt is there.
For what will they do when they pull him out?
Oh despair.
For he wasn't a very nice man you see
We all agree. We all agree.
If they've got any sense they'll leave him be
Leave him be.
And what will they do with the man if he thaws?
If ever that be. If ever that be.
Well they may just chuck him awa' to the craws
And he'll cease to be.
John Seymour, Killowen, New Ross, Co. Wexford, Ireland (tel 00 353 51 88156)