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FUP-HOPE.LIT
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1994-10-15
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3KB
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35 lines
At Least I Hope
Walk screaming down cold corridors of clean steal, steel my heart, always
dark it seems another reason to wear glasses besides the obvious fashion. Of it
all, seems to fade like wood in the sun, want to tell you but can't always
run.....away from you from the truth from how I feel...feel? Alone lonely if
only. Stop street traffic lights stop me stop green stop telling you lies. lay
down my head and cry.... poor boy, changes his clothes and puts on aftershave
to compensate for his ordinary shoes.. drift in and out of cheap people bars
filled with the stench of age and stale liqueur another round for my fiend here
her call out when I get up and leave......I tell her I can't cause I don't love
her she says that doesn't matter so I do and it does and it is bad and boring
like every other time, get bored not cause its women not at all, men are just
as boring but less attractive and less real more hid deep feelings never to be
revealed like me with you. Why can i not seem to tell you how I feel..never had
this problem before, the word love used to just spew out of my mouth now that
I actually might be feeling it I can't even tell you I like you a lot never
felt this before probably never will again and I keep dreaming although we will
probably never be more than friends and to think Mrs. Harris thought that we
were going out and didn't that just make my heart flutter and then before when
describing Mr. M and the dream state which he seemed to conjure and all the
special feelings that go with seeing someone creative, but he screwed you
around and now you wont trust me at least it seems to me or well you do but you
say I don't count. Cause I'm not like the rest and that's why you like me but
not in that way, that way you still want the rest and I don't understand. LSD
and beer on a cool night after one long screech my ears ringing you glowing me
not knowing, what to say how to act and where oh where the fuck do I stand with
you? I ask this question to myself but do nothing to find the answer in real
life. REEL life, splicing and mixing tape into the wee hours alone and can
anyone understand the pure joy I get from the "fucking noise" that everyone
else seems to hate, but I've found others over the years. Where do I stand with
YOU? do you hate me? for not telling her ?do you find me pathetique? or just
boring? and ringing in your ear? Oh but you love it .....at least I hope.
SAUCE00At Least I HopefUpMiSTiGRiS20941014