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1995-04-04
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■■■ Introduction-1
32
April's Fool Pack
Cthulu
Hey, Cthulu, or, I should say, "K-thUlU", what was that weird MIST0104.ZIP
thing floating around? Was that some sort of sick joke?
Yes, it was a joke. Yes, it was sick.
In case some doofuses failed to read certain files included within the
archive, MIST0104.ZIP was not intended to be serious at all. The art was
done more or less entirely by people who ordinarily would not have created
works in that medium. As a result, they were very bad at it.
The exception to this is Eto's very first game that he made in CS 11, Bob vs
the Mob 8). That was the coolest part of the pack.
I hope no one took it too seriously, what with the ripping of the Somms ansi
and such, but I think that we take the scene too seriously for what it is.
If you are offended, that was the intent. If you were disgusted, that was
also the intent. If you liked it, you are one sick puppy.
Special greets to: CiA for having the same idea, and
Acid Phix for sticking to the 'art for the artists' idea
that I'm trying to promote.
■■■ Articles-I-1
217
Ascii Wars.. Uh.. #3?
Cthulu
ASCII WARZ: PART ... er... 3?
This month's ASCII WarZ features contributions from Young, Nitty, Mav,
Timewarp, Tzeentch, Merlyn, and Prong! Woo!
TST's new Music base has been somewhat revamped by the ensuing carnage...
or, as Timewarp said...
TW> hehehe... ascii is cool
TW>
TW> \ \ _______
TW> \ \ /-) |MUSIC|
TW> \ \)/ / |BASE |
TW> | / -------
TW> ---
TW>
TW>BOOTED!
TW>
TW>i can't draw feet :)
Anyway... enjoy...
---
INNNNnn response to eerie's comment about the size of Young's gun from last
month...
YO>
YO>extreme demands, extreme measures
YO>
YO>
YO> 2 4 7 5
YO> | | | |
YO> <||> |----_____ ________ _____ ________ \||/
YO> (oO) _|\|====|____)|________|||||||(________| [oO
YO> _--__|____ooOo]__ __=|==== ====== ( o )
YO> /nuke_____>) | |=| /33!\
YO> \| | . | |=| <--1 \| |/ <--- 8
YO> | 6 \|
YO> 3
YO>deeyo's MR-257a
YO>
YO>features:
YO>
YO>1- ammunition compartment
YO>2- night vision and infrared magnifying telescope
YO>3- gun handle
YO>4- explosion noise suppressor
YO>5- cannon end
YO>6- loading area
YO>7- flare suppressor
YO>8- inflatable moving target
YO>
YO>yo.spastique
---
The Skateboard:
MA> l8r sk8r
TW>
TW> uhh.. i hate that OLD saying :)
MA> l8r sk8r
MA> l8r sk8r
MA> l8r sk8r
MA> l8r sk8r
MA> l8r sk8r
MA> l8r sk8r
MA> l8r sk8r
MA>
MA> O/
MA> /l
MA> \_/_\_/
MA> o o
MA>
TW> that looks like the Michael Jordan Flight symbol :)
MA> Ok how about this..
MA>
MA> .∙-----∙.
MA> ( i got )
MA> `(_ air! )'
MA> .,,. o ---'
MA> |oo| ∙'
MA> _( o)__._
MA> / -`__(-,\
MA> //)/|wB| ''
MA> ``' /`/\'\.·.
MA> /_/ \/'//
MA> ∙~~∙ \ \ `
MA> o\ \ `~
MA> \ \.
MA> o`∙·∙' ma!
MA>
---
The Rolling Loo:
CT> You CAN'T SELL A LOO DOOR-TO-DOOR.
CT> At least, not a good one.
MER> Pfft. Shows you how much you know. WHAT IF IT HAD WHEELS?
MER>
MER> In which case, not only would you be able to sell it door-to-door, but
MER> you could ride it down steep hills, too. Zooooom...
MER>
MER> | ________
MER> |[_______ ] --------------------------
MER> |│==o |
MER> |│ | ----------------------------
MER> .=========º│ / Z O O M !
MER> ( ____/ -------------------------------
MER> `, /
MER> / | ------------------------------
MER> '__________` _______________________
MER> (0) (0)
MER>
HS>...It's not aerodynamic enough
---
How to keep a demon happy:
CT> That rules out, Eternal, Nightmare, Evil, Distorted, Immortal, Morbid, Death
CT> (anything to do with death, more or less), Tomatoes, Toasters, Shrimp,
CT> Daemon's, ALL song or album or band names, movie names too, and, well, more
MA> Daemons dont have anything to do with death and evil..
MA>
MA> at least my daemons dont..
MA> they're happy daemons!
MA>
MA> /| ___ |\
MA> ( / - \ )
MA> |(o) (o)|
MA> |.--_--,|
MA> \ \___/ /
MA> ~~~~~
---
Nitty's first attempt at Ascii art:
NIT> Well, now that I'm running Reneagde, might as well take advantage of this
NIT> full screen editor and do some ascii art on Kitschnet.
NIT>
NIT> . . |
NIT> .`_``_`, \ |
NIT> |(_)(_), /\ )
NIT> c| U | / .`
NIT> \\__/. / /
NIT> \__/ / /
NIT> ___|__|_/ /
NIT> / /
NIT> / |
NIT> / /| |
NIT> / / | |
NIT> ( \ / | |
NIT> |||) /`------`
NIT> /
NIT> /
NIT>
NIT>
NIT>oh screw it.
---
Happy Birthday, from Tzeentch:
TZ> (yesterday?) HAPPY BIRTHDAY... you deserve and ASCii (woo elite!)... heh..
TZ>
TZ>
TZ> ***
TZ> recent warez ----> *Oo*
TZ> grubb'd look! oOo (^ )
TZ> \_\ |-^*
TZ> \\ \( * <---- wild thang characteristic- pony-tail...
TZ> \\/-\
TZ> \ \
TZ> | b|\_oOo
TZ> (fashion narrator: mike | 0|\__/
TZ> is seen here sporting | n|
TZ> classic warez grubbing | k| <---- skater shirt that makes no sense
TZ> gear...) ^---^ to anyone...
TZ> | |
TZ> | | |
LW> Oh yeah... forgot... Happy B-day. Yours is the day before mine. :)
TZ> hey- you shoulda said something... well- here's a belated happy b-day
TZ> ascii...
TZ>
TZ>
TZ> ****
TZ> cheese stoner look --> *|Oo*
TZ> |< )* "I'm not George dammit!!"
TZ> goatee --> (-)| /
TZ> . ||_
TZ> /c\ / (
TZ> /hee\// //
TZ> /_____)| //|
TZ> |seisgo_// |
TZ> |ood!!o /_/|
TZ> |_____o/___| <-- star trek uniform
TZ> | |
TZ> | | |
TZ> | | |
TZ> | | |
TZ> | | |
TZ>belated wishes friend...
TZ>
■■■ Articles-I-2
369
Ascii Parts.. Uh.. #3?
Cthulu
What we do to NKOTB fans:
DE> new kids on the block fan right here boyz, I've X'd his head prepare to thro
DE> tomatos at will..
MA>
MA> aiyeee!
MA> \
MA> __\|/ ,,,
MA> ---- / (o)o) x |
MA> zoom! | _--_| (o)@
MA> ---- `. /__ / (_ |
MA> ~~~~ _|_|_
MA> |dest!|
MA> | |
MA>
MA>not only a tomato, but a SCREAMING tomato.. hows that for class.
---
A l'il something ripped from Twingle 8):
FS> ,""""""", O <-fatal sacrilege grandma-> ( Ö,Ö )
FS>YIPES! | (O O) |o ____\_o_/__
FS> ( " o) Thats Me Smokin A Blunt ____ * * __
FS> | (╦) o| And Seeing My Grandma Butt-Naked! ""| . |""
FS>____oOo___\__║o_/_____oOo___ _____ ____ ___ __ _ _ _ _ _ / /\ \
FS>
---
Nitty's SECOND attempt at ascii art:
NIT> ___|p___
NIT> .` `.
NIT> .` .--- ___ `
NIT> | |__| |__| |
NIT> | __()___ |
NIT> | ,` `. |
NIT> `.|_________).`
NIT> `---------"
NIT> ladies and gentlemen.. I present to you: THE SCREAMING TOMATO.
NIT> Thank you.
---
The difference between rocks and cheese:
TW> __ .._ ..,
TW> / rock )
TW> (_______/
TW>
TW> .....
TW> ** |
TW> { (oo)
TW> Pencil Neck Nit ---> | +
TW> | |-)
TW> \ /
TW> ||
TW>
TW> This is the punishment for BAD ASCII DRAWING! (but mine isn't much better
TW> so.. :)
NIT>
NIT> /----\
NIT> / /\
NIT> Well... \ / \
NIT> \ / \
NIT> \ / \/
NIT> \ /
NIT> \ / <---big chunk of cheese
NIT> _\/_ \-/
NIT> (_)(_).
NIT> / O \
NIT> | o | <---tIMEwARP!
NIT> `.____|
NIT> | |
---
The Battle Royale, ending in a nice light lunch:
MA> take this!
MA>
MA> _____________
MA> / \
MA> | `/
MA> | --
MA> | / --
MA> | | ___ \
MA> | / \ / \ |
MA> \_|o.o|_| o |__/
MA> | - | ~~~
MA> \ /
MA> ..--' `--..
MA> `'--, .--`'
MA> | |
MA> _ /_/\\ _
MA> (___| |___)
MA>
MA> giant tomato biting Tw on the head because he beat up his friend with a
MA> cricket bat.
NIT> Y'know, it looks awefully like a man standing in front of a picture of
NIT> a house and jolly little sunset...
TW> tw in form of tomato to take on Mav
TW>oh yeaH! /
TW> .__\|/_,
TW> / O \
TW> ( \___ ) ___
TW> \._______ /__\ \_____
TW> / \________ _ |||||
TW> | ________) |_) | Oo|
TW> | ________) |_) | __| <-- Mavrik
TW> \______________________/ ||__|
TW> / \ / \
TW> ( OoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoO) |\\__|
TW> \______________________/ | \---@
TW> | _/
TW> / /\ \
TW> / / \ \__
TW> (___) (___) (__
NIT> ah, so we're going into the military now, are we?
NIT> /\
NIT> / \
NIT> /\ \
NIT> / /\ /
NIT>axe ---> / / \/
NIT> / /./---\
NIT> / / |()() |
NIT> / / | o/-.|
NIT> / \.( / | <---tIMEwARP!
NIT> | |
NIT>
NIT> ah, the good ol' fashioned single-bladed axe will beat ANY army.
TW> /##
TW> / /
TW> / /
TW> / /
TW>
TW> #####
TW> | | <- Broken axe cause nitty didn't know i sawed it off earlier
TW> |___|
TW>
TW>(small scale mood :)
NIT> Looks more like a knife and a jar of peanutbutter. Mmmmm.
TW> _____
TW> / /\
TW> /____/*/
TW> |*****/
TW> -----
TW>
TW>have a peanut butter and jelly sandwhich Nit, on me :)
---
More edible, drinkable, and SMOKABLE stuffs...:
TW> |||| @@
TW> \\ (00) //
TW> \\|__|//. <- tw preparing for some stewed tomato
TW> \||/
TW> ||
TW> _\|/_
TW> / O O \ <- Nitty in the pot
TW> \\________//
TW> \________/
TW> \________/
MA> \\/\/\/\\/\/
MA> |-_. ._- |
MA> ((o))_((o))')
MA> | ~( )~ |
MA> | .---___ |
MA> \/ /----' |
MA> ./ /______/
MA> (##)/
MA> `''
MA> ^-- nitty SMOKING the pot
NIT> hELP!
NIT> \
NIT> _ _ _
NIT> __ _ _ _ ___________________ ( |__)(.)|
NIT> Nit--> / (_)_) ( \ | |-/ |
NIT> | | | |___| tIMEwARP dOG |---------
NIT> \ \___ (_____|___________________|
TW>
TW> ___ / ----\
TW> / \ _ (O )
TW> ( O O ) \ | <- TW pacman
TW> | ___ | _/ )
TW> | | \____/
TW> ^^^^^^^
TW>
TW> Nit ghost /^
TW>
TW>baah.
---
Mortal Kombat ]I[:
MA> hiya! ._\|/.
MA> . \ / \
MA> . . . |_(o(o) |
MA> . (____ |
MA> . ' ___ ____\______/_
MA> __/__'--.|____ \ / \
MA> / \ `' `|___\_| |
MA> | | | | /_ /\_|_|
MA> |_|___|_| | |
MA> () () | | |
MA> | | | .------.
MA> _|_|__| . ..| , o |
MA> (_(____| . .' `--| |o -'
MA> ~
MA>
MA> mr karate tomato guy chops off TW's head.
TW> really? it looks like a mortal kombat rip. oh well.. here's my MK then..
TW>
TW> ___
TW> | Oo| so i can't draw fire in ascii, sue me
TW> Me -> |__/_ \\ @ @
TW> |___| \\ \\ \ \ |||| //
TW> _| |__ \ \\ \\ |Oo| // <- Mav
TW> /_ | | \\\\ \\|--|//
TW> //| | | \ \ \ \ / /
TW> // | | | \\\\\ | ,|
TW> ( ) | | | \ \\\ \ /
TW> |_| _____ \/\/\\
TW>
PR> ahhah. my turn
PR>
PR> |||||
PR> | oO|
PR> |/--\
PR> |\--/
PR> --+--
PR> ' +,
PR> , + `
PR> ` + '
PR> ` + ' ,
PR> ' + ` ,
PR> '+ ` , '
PR> , '' ` , ,` '
PR>
PR>thats supposed to be blood flying from his spine ;)
PR>
TW> so.. well, unorginal.
TW> ___ ,
TW> /______\ <- Tw in form of a Venus Fly Trap
TW> (/+++++++ ////
TW> (\--------, ahh!(Oo)|
TW> / /\______/ \|--\|
TW> / | |___|
TW> ( |_o __ || __
TW> | | / _ \
TW> | | | | |_) | |
TW>o-| | | | |rong| |
TW>\_|_|__/, |@|______|@|
TW>|______|
TW>so.. well, unorginal.
---
The Battle continues:
TW> \\\\
TW> | Oo|
TW>_| \_|_ ___
TW>| \___ _ |_|_/ooooooo
TW> \____(_|__ _ o
TW> | | \ooooooo '`,', ,'`,
TW> \ \ \ | || | _ |
TW> | | | ||||| | || |( )|
TW> | | | | oO| _| || || ||
TW> |___)__) ,',` (____|| ',`',
TW>
MA> hahaha.
MA>
MA> |||| ,;,......,,··∙∙''````\...,'''.
MA> |oO| `''``````''∙∙··,,..../````....`
MA> \\\ | / /// // `| |
MA> '\ \||/ /` ~~ ~~~ mav's gun
MA> | ~~ |
MA> | tw!|
MA>
MA> i keel you wif my big gun..
TW> ||||
TW> | (+) <- tw's infrared sensor ****
TW> | _) (Oo)
TW> | __| | o| <- mav and his
TW> __ \ /__ |(_) target
TW> / \ __\ /__
TW> | \_|=|,,,...,.,...OOOOO / /----\
TW> \_("""",.oooo......++/ | | |
TW> | |_|+| |__/ |--+---|
TW> |________ | | | |
TW> \_|__/
---
An inspired retelling of a classic joke:
TW>"when mav's moma sits around the house, she REALLY sits around the house
TW>
TW>
TW> * * *
TW> * *
TW> * * <- mav's mom
TW> | O o|
TW> | __ |
TW> | |
TW> ___ \ /____
TW>
TW> /\
TW> |_| <- mav's house
TW>
---
We warned you...:
NIT> If anyone makes a reference about the movie 'Fried Green Tomatoes', I
NIT> shall give that person a great big boot to the head.
TW> tomato made a cameo in the shop :) and.. my all time fave is, FRIED GREEN
TW> TOMATOES
NIT> I warned you buddy.
NIT>
NIT> \ \ / /
NIT> \ \ \ / /
NIT> \ \ / /
NIT> \ \ \ / / /----\
NIT> \ / /_-/ ) /-------\
NIT> / Nit's foot / |(o)(0) |
NIT> \_______________/ | g |
NIT> | --U--- | <--tIMEwARP!
NIT> \_______/
NIT>
NIT> No, that is not a flying 'l'.
NIT>
NIT> And.. no, that is not a large magnet coming out of tIMEwARP's g-shaped
NIT>nose, it is infact, his tongue sticking out his mouth.
NIT>
NIT> Wow, I really suck. I'm sticking to ansi.
Well... that's it for this month.
Next month, *I* might even take a hand at ascii drawing...
(flee! flee in terror!)
Cthulu
Unofficial Message-Capturer
■■■ Introduction-2
41
Birthdays!
Cthulu
Happy birthday this month to... ME!
▄ Yes. ▄ ▐ ▄
▄░▌ ME ▐█▌ ░▌ ▓▌
EMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEME▐▄▀EMEME▌▄▀EMEME▐▄MEMEMEME▄▐MEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEM
EMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEME▐█▌EMEME▐▓▌EMEMEM█▌EMEMEME█▌MEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEM
EMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEME▐▌▓EMEME██MEMEME▐█▓EMEMEME▐█MEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEM
EMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEME▓█▄▌MEME▓██EMEME▐█▐EMEMEM▐▄▓MEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEM
EMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEME▐██ ME▄E▐█▌EMEME▓██EMEMEM▓██MEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEM
EMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEME ▄▌▄▄▀▄▌▄█▓▌▀▀▄██▄▄▄▀▄▀▄▓▄▄██▄▀▄▓▄▄▄▌▄MEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEM
EMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEME▐▀▀█▓█████░▀▀▀████▓▀▀▀██████▀░█▀▀▓█▀█▓MEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEM
EMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEME░▐▌▐▀▄▓▄▄▄▄███▄▀░▀▄███▄▄▄▄▀ ▓▄▄▓█▄▄▐▄▐▌EMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEM
EMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEME▐▐▓▄██████▓████▄▀▐▓██████████████▓▌▀▓▐MEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEM
EMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEM▓██████████████▌▄█████▓██████████▄▓▌▀MEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEM
EMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEM▀▄▄▀██████████████████▄▄▀██████████▌EMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEM
EMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEME▐████████████████▓███▀█████████▓▀▀██▓EMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEM
EMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEM▀▓▄▄▄▄▀▓█▀▀▀▄▄▓▄▄▄▀▀▀▄▄░▄▀▀▀▓▀ ▓█▄▀▀EMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEM
EMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEM▀▐▀█▓▀▀█ ▀▀▀▀▀▓▀▀▀▀▀▓▀▀mz▀▓▄▀▀▀▀▓▌▀EMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEM
EMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEM▌▄▓▄██▌▄▄▄█▓███▄▄███████▄▄██▄██▌▓▄▄▐EMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEM
▀▀ ▀▀▀▀▀▀ ▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀ ▀▀▀▀▀▀ ▀▀
This month Cthulu-the-great turns the grand 16 years
of age. What a treat. My birthday is on the release
date... so by the time you read this it'll be already
too late to get me anything. WELL... THANKS A HEAP.
There are probably other people's birthdays as well,
but mine is the only important one 8).
"And what do you want for your birthday, little boy?"
"A pony, a duckie, a fire engine, and an art group that's loved by all!"
"Dear me, we seem to be out. Oh, what's this... how about an art group that's
loved by all but which can't seem to keep its good members in?"
"Good 'nuff. Gimme gimme gimme!"
Perhaps I made the wrong decision.
Someone please prove me incorrect.
Cth/Mist
■■■ Articles-II-1
136
Are You A Fool?
Cthulu
ARE YOU A FOOL?
And exactly how foolish *are* you...?
Take our patented FoOl-O-mEtEr to find out!
1) My favorite movie is:
a) Dumb and Dumber
b) Ishtar
c) Pee-Wee's Big Adventure
d) Godzilla vs the Smog Monster
2) Complete this phrase: Fools rush in...
a) where angels fear to tread.
b) ... and are worth two in the bush?
c) to an all-you-can eat smorgasbord hosted by the SPCA.
d) to open manholes. (happens ALL the time.)
3) My best friend is:
a) Teddy Ruxbin
b) ... worth two in the bush?
c) Grubby the Octapede
d) Harvey the Wonder Hamster!
4) Complete this phrase: A fool and his money...
a) are soon parted.
b) ... are worth two in the bush?
c) both contain the letter 'o'.
d) walk into a bar... OWCH!
5) When I see a penny on the sidewalk I...
a) ignore it. One cent? Puh-LEEZE...
b) look for another one in the bush.
c) glue it on to annoy passer-byers.
d) Carefully pick it up and stash it with my collection.
Gonna fill a swimming pool full of 'em, just like Unca Scrooge.
6) When I find a penny on the sidewalk that has been glued on, I...
a) ignore it. Some moron's idea of a practical joke.
b) Glue the one in the bush to the ground, too.
c) Glue the bush to the ground, too.
d) Glue my forehead to the penny in the bush and scream, so that people
will think that I'm caught in a man-eating bush.
7) When I find a man with his head in a bush, I...
a) give him a good kick in the pants out of disgust.
b) look for pennies lying around.
c) report to the authorities about an asylum escapee.
d) report to the authorities about a man-eating plant.
8) Complete this phrase: Hey mom, pass the hammysink!
a) What?
b) ...er... two... bush?
c) Lippy, lyepie, and a pipey sinking.
d) Now what the hell is hammysink?
9) The most magnificent musical instrument of all time is:
a) the accordion
b) the kazoo
c) the slide whistle
d) my belly. No, listen. (slap slap jiggle WHOMP... echo echo)
10) My name is:
a) Little Bongo
b) I like to sing my song-o
c) There's just one place that I'd belong:
d) "That would be the Congo." "Very good, Bongo."
(with all respects to Matt Groening)
11) Why did the chicken cross the road?
a) ah ... to get to the other side?
b) to find its mate in the opposite bush.
c) because he was blue. (?)
d) because he was stapled to the freight train.
12) What is a fool?
a) loof backwards.
b) Cool without the C.
c) Drool without the D and the R.
d) Nyarlathotep without the N, the Y, the A, R, A, T, H, T, E, P, and with
an F and an O. Now you know.
13) What makes me a fool?
a) My outlandish attire and ridiculous usage of obscure vocabulary.
"Felcher... tee hee."
b) Mi badd speeling and punktuaton aswell
c) The second head certifies me as a FREAK... but a fool? Hm...
d) Can't you read? (takes out pricetag worn around neck,
reading FOOL: $2.79)
14) Complete the phrase: And He said, let there be..
a) "light. And light was made. And He saw that it was good."
b) jell-o.
c) Mister Tube Steak
d) copious quantities of silly string erupting out of all of my bodily
orifices. (the non-flammable kind.) (SILLY STRING, you sicko, not
orifices.)
15) What goes INTO Mister Tube Steak, anyway?
a) the naughty bits of a cow.
b) weiner dogs
c) the crunchy bits in old yogurt
d) Mister Tube Steak himself, and his many many children.
16) What was so sickening about that last question?
a) the reference to naughty bits. Simply shocking!
b) the reference to eating poor little doggy-woggies. Don't worry, Fluffy,
Mama won't let the mean men take you away.
c) the fact that I think that the crunchy bits are the best part.
d) the fact that I failed entirely to mention bushes at all.
17) Complete this phrase: Waiter, there's a fly...
a) in my soup.
b) in my soap.
c) in my frog.
d) in my alligator pie. If you don't gimme more, I think I'm gonna cry.
18) Which of these is the best book?
a) Goodbye, moon
b) The Twits
c) anything by Stephen King or Danielle Steele
d) Green Eggs and Ham
19) Complete this phrase: One fish, two fish...
a) red fish, blue fish.
b) Ed Fish, Stu Fish
c) fetish, radish
d) three fish, four fish... FOUR FISH! AH ah ah ah ah ah (thunder crackles)
20) This survey was...
a) another pathetic heap of recycled gags and in-jokes.
b) Chernoble-boy! Have-a some-a stomache-ay! Ninjas jump over houses!
c) the best one yet! I see a Pulitzer coming for this young man...
d) blue.
■■■ Articles-II-2
67
April's Lame Parade
Cthulu
April's Lame Parade:
Once more, we present more groups in our area code's (mainly) recent history.
Are any of these still around? Damned few.
■[AxX] AxXaun Flight
■Founder: ?
■Duration: '93, DEAD DEAD DEAD
.MOD group, predecessor to EuphoniX
■[CAS] Casual
■Founder: Prong
■Duration: new
A new ANSI group started, to practise for until Prong gets good enough to
join a REAL group. Sigh.
■[DeC] Dedicated Entirely to Cracking
■Founder: Lizard Mon
■Duration: new
New cracking group. The fact that they have no cracking experience?
Negligible.
■[DiS] Distilled
■Founder: Spirit of Illusion
■Duration: just started, just died
A bunch (all, in fact) of our old 604 acid members, Spirit of Illusion,
Morbius, Vanquish, Asian Knight, and Soul Blazer, left to start their own
integrity-type operation. But, I guess one per ac was enough, as, they are
no more.
■[EBK] Everybody Knows
■Founder: Bishop
■Duration: Brand spanking new
You know, new ansi/text group. blah blah blah. You know. (Ba-doom CHING!)
■[EPOC] Elite Pirates Or Cavemen
■Founder: Courtesian
■Duration: as long as the scene has been around.
A new club for people who can't seem to articulate properly.
Ex: OO0ga! Me 31i73+++! W4nt W4r3zZ!
■[PSM] Prism
■Founder: Darc Dragon
■Duration: new
New courier group looking for crackers, couriers, ansi artists, and
programmers. Sad. Some people have actually shelled out money for their
patronage.
■[PWHAFU] People Who Have All Fix Unregistered
■Founder: Mavrik
■Duration: new
Club started by Mavrik in a fit of passion, until he realized that he wasn't
on Atlantis anymore.
■[TLL] The Legacy Lords
■Founder: ?
■Duration: '92, DEAD DEAD DEAD
Predecessor to AxXaun Flight, itself a predecessor to EuphoniX.
■■■ Introduction-3
69
Greetz!
Cthulu
Seeing as this could be my last chance to do so, what with mist being ripped
apart like it is, I offer
Greetz gruntz groanz grovelz grappelz and simply general gentility towardz:
Me : For just being such a spliffy guy.
D'artagnan : For taking all the abuse of your lit from a 15-year old 8)
Livewire : For proving to me that there is a mind warped enough out there
to match mine.
Eoanya : Well, too much to sum up in a simple two-line blurb.
Etana : For avoiding my omnipresent tread at Jamu's house
Reanimator : For having such funky hair
Coyote : For giving me something to look forward to in Concrete
Sauron : For showing me that I'm not a lost breed
Nitnatsnoc : For putting up with me, and the group, for as long as you did.
TNT : For having a truely original style and refusing to conform.
D. Traveller: For doing all those cool farty monsters.
T. Extremist: For having a handle that went so well with the group name
Mavrik : Kithe, Kitsch, the GI Joes, and the collaborations.
ts : For giving me your fake e-mail address, which gave me no end of
irritation.
Soi : CANE TOADS
Halaster : For being willing to make up differences
Prisoner#1 : For being one of 4 people to comment on my lit.
Ktulu : For having such a cool handle
Cthulhu : ditto
HP Hovercraf: ditto
Derr Kapoo : For fixing the app gen
Helter : For hanging around and begging for art
Questor : For sticking around for kithe even after you quit
Eto : Goldview rocks.
Minus : But so does Pablo
Terminally N: For giving me someone to talk to in email.
Eerie : For giving us such a boost in the beginning
Mage : For doing that cool cake for me.
Darkforce : For being such a professional, through peace and war
Fab One : For being so anal, and giving me someone to compare to Larry C.
Young : For the spliffy ASCIIs
Lord Jazz : For making writing for dive my eventual goal
Tzeentch : For being such a font master
Zoltar : See above
vanquish : See above
beatle : for staying as an effective gauge of our eliteness level
Phaze : for the screaming turkey
Skutt : for showing me that there is such a thing as good computer
classical music
Israfel : for being an inspiration
Sniper : For being a more recent inspiration 8)
Cat : For simply BEING
my my my. There are so many other people to greet...
All the people in IRC, even the op-mongers and /dcc leeches, Integrity,
Spastic, Blade, Void, Grip, HFR, The Immortal Syndicate, Triton, KLF, Storm,
EuphoniX, Digitronic, Digitallusions, Revolt, Reality, Psychosis, TeklordZ,
Fire, Raid, Concrete, Unreal, Undergrown, the people who gave us SAUCE,
ICEcolour, GLOW3.EXE, and Acidbox, Sonic Equinox, Divine, Shiver, and.. mmm..
I think that's everyone worth mentionning.
If we do manage to stay alive until next month, I promise not to post this
again.
Oh, and a big sloppy greet to the narc, who, despite leaving me off the
imperial memberlist for 3 months running, inspired this greet file idea here.
We love you, Chico. (Well, most of us, except Andre 8)
Cthulu · MiST Founder [10/94 - ??/??]
■■■ Introduction-4
36
Founders Corner
Cthulu
Founder's corner:
Well now. The pack may seem to be smaller this month. That is due to
the assistance of my good friend Nitnatsnoc, as he's formally known, and his
relentless quest for the limits of Quality Control, and in the process
making a tense situation even less fun for some people. But oh well. The
pack'll look nicer, even if it may be our last one.
Yes, people, though mist has not outlived its lifetime, people are
getting restless (those dang ANSI drawers, in specific), and feel that it's
time for them to move on to bigger and better things.
Ah, I remember a thing called loyalty we used to have.
Ahem, ignore that. The scene only deserves as much respect from us as
it gives TO us, and after fighting oppression for several months, I'm almost
fought out. But at least I've kept true in my dream to make the 'scene' as
fun for myself and anyone who would let me help them. But, as it stands,
with discontent from the fire side, and us original misters rapidly running
out of options, the choice is coming close: pull the plug, or miraculously
become healed.
You have it in your power to keep us alive. My complaints here will,
I hope, not go unanswered. If you feel that you can do something to us,
whether it be through joining, merging, or what have you, please, don't
hesitate to leave me e-mail at cthulu@outb.wimsey.bc.ca, or on the screaming
tomato (604) 430-8805.
Everything else that I wish to say, has been said before.
It's in your hands now.
Cthulu
Mist Founder
"Blub Blub"
■■■ Introduction-5
41
Mistigris News
Nitnatsnoc
Hi. This is Nitnatsnoc handling the news for Mistigris's April pack (our 6th).
Cthulu is usually in charge of this, but I chopped-off his fingers with the
blunt side of an axe, so typing's kind of rough for him. Oh well. Hopefully
this pack will be more organized than the previous five packs we've released.
Well, this is the second pack Mistigris ▄▀█▀▄▄▄▀██▀▄▄
has released after the merger with Fire. ▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄ ▄▀█▄▀▀▀▀▄ ▀▓▀▀▄▀▓▄
Things didn't go too smoothly at first, ▄██Mistigris██▄ ■▀ ▄███▀▄████▄ ▀▄
but now things have started to settle- ▐█news for March▌ ▐▓█▀▌▐█████▀▌▄▀▌
down. Yay. ▐█▓ 1995! ▌ ▐███▌▐██████▌▄▀
▀███ ██████▀ ▄▀▀▀▄▄▀████▀▄ ▌
As usual, Mist lost a few members since ▀▀▀▀▀▓▀▀▀███▒▄■▐██████▄▄▄▄▓▌▀
we last released a pack. Minus, who has ▀▓ ▀████▄▄███▀
been with us since the first pack, has ▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▄▄█ ▄▄▄
left the group due to lack of interest. ▄▀█████▀▄█████
His contributions to the group include ▄███▄▄▄▄▄███████
our very first viewer, a number of ansis ▐███████████████▓
and of course the ansi drawing program
Pablo. Psychoskylark leaves the group after doing a bunch of lit for us to
continue working on some Internet project of his (what it is exactly I don't
know). Asian Knight and Morbius have been removed from the memberlist as well.
They were going to do some minor ANSI stuff for us for one month, and, well,
that one month is over now. Prince of Death leaves us after one month of
producing k-nifty logos, and is now a freelance artist. Azagoth, formerly of
the now defunct Wild Buffalo Tamerz, joined our VGA department and produced a
cool-looking Mistigris promotional logo. Then some SURREAL (heh) thing came-up
and he mosied on down to Union. LOGICally (heh) he has been taken out of the
memberlist. prisonernumberone, one of the VERY few artists out there with a
very distinguishable style, left the group with a bang this month; he's got 8
pieces of quality work in this pack! We wish all departing members good luck
on their future adventures.
Well, enough with the bad news, on with the good: we made two additions to the
memberlist this month. Deadpool joins our VGA department from the dying/about-
to-die Relic. Fob, previously unaffiliated with any art group, joins the team
to contribute to the ansi department. Both new members will recieve their
McDonald's gift certificates in the mail.
Well, that's all I have to say for now I guess. Enjoy the rest of the pack!