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- Underground eXperts United
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- Presents...
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- [ Castle Chronicles Chapter One ] [ By THE CHIEF ]
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- UNASSAILABLE EXPEDITIONS THROUGH A TORMENTED BASEMENT
-
- CHAPTER ONE
-
-
- Steve Castle took his hat from the shelf and paid the woman behind
- the counter. Ah, what an excellent lunch. French toast and a cup
- of coffee. That was a lunch for kings! He went out to the street
- and started to walk down Gainsbury Road that lead down to the docks.
-
- He was to meet a man who had vital information about the case he
- was working on. Castle called the case "The Man & No Man" for reasons
- he only knew himself. Apparently, a man had entered a shoe shop in
- Regent Street on November 6th. This may not seem very unusual, but
- in this case it was, because the man had, as said, entered the store,
- but never left it! His wife was hysterical first, then after the
- first year, she calmed down. Robin and James, his kids, didn't under-
- stand what had happened because they were only One and Three years
- old by the time of his disappearance.
-
- Now, 15 years later, Castles first breakthrough was about to happen.
- Warehouse 86, the man had said. Castle walked slowly in the warm
- spring sun, facing the breeze from the ocean with great pleasure.
- Aaaah, he filled his lungs with the salty air and got a bug with it.
- Ahum, splutt! Duh! was his reaction to this. Left, Left and then
- Right. Aha, Number 86! He entered the big warehouse. Pitch black!
- Castle lit his flashlight and started to search for the door the man
- had said he would be behind. Johnsson, Stevens, Bartholomo-Gainsville,
- Turner, Jones, Harry, Imbehindthisone! That's the one. He opened the
- door. If it is possible to describe something that's darker than
- pitch black, this was it. Behind the door, Castle could just make out
- the stairs leading downwards.
-
- With careful steps he started to descend. The moisten air met his
- face like a wall. When he examined it, he discovered that it in
- fact really Was a wall. With the nose bleeding, he ran into a man
- who was hiding in a trunk filled with used condoms.
-
- "Watch it buddy!", said the man. "This is My hiding-place. You just
- have to find one of your own." The man closed the trunk and continued
- to hide (or whatever he was doing in there, I let your imagination
- decide here, because there's a vast number of possibilities. No?
- Well, consider that he May be eating dinner, reading a good book or
- perhaps watching the late night game between Bruins and the Vikings.
- See? Now I can't spend more time on this because it has nothing to
- do with the story whatsoever!)
-
- Castle continued to search with his flashlight, only to find that
- there was nothing there. The basement was about 2x2 meters big,
- and the only thing down there was the trunk with the... Ah, it must
- be Him!, Castle thought out loud for himself. "Shhh!" said the man
- who had re-opened the trunk. "Do you think we're alone down here!?"
- Castle thought for a couple of seconds, and then decided that he
- couldn't come to another conclusion and said "I have personally
- searched the whole basement, and I can assure you that we are alone."
-
- The man crawled out of the trunk, covered with slime and something
- that looked like a half-eaten pizza. "Want a piece?" he asked
- brushing off the slime. "Yes, thanks!", Castle replied and started
- a process in his stomach that killed 137 million germs, but also
- created 137 new ones. The man whispered something in Castles ear
- that didn't make Castle very surprised. He walked the 22 cm to the
- trunk, knocked on the side and opened the lock, revealing a beautiful
- girl with only her underwear on. "Hi beauty", Castle greeted her.
- "Hello" she said, "You want to join us?". "Sure", Castle said, but
- remembered that he was on a case and turned down the offer with
- apologies.
-
- The man, introduced himself as Jerry Steinberg III, king of A-Shoes.
- Castle stretched out his hand, but drew it right back when he saw
- Steinberg's filled with cheese, pizza and a little stain of greebt-
- ofla-bahajmatal, a deadly Indian take-away. Jerry started to tell
- his tale.
-
- "16 years ago, I owned a store up on Regent Street. We had the best
- in leatherware. Jackets, trousers, gloves, but also Shoes."
-
- "Aha", Castle said. "Continue please."
-
- "Yes, as I said, we sold Shoes. Only the best of course!.. ehm,
- where was I, oh yes, Shoes. So we sold these Shoes. Everyone wanted
- them, and we sold about 300.000 pairs a week in the beginning.
-
- "A remarkable number indeed", Castle let out with admiration in his
- voice.
-
- "Oh but it wasn't that, no, not at all. After four weeks, a month,
- our production of these shoes had reached 4 million a day, and
- the sales didn't go down, so in the end we sold over 5 million a
- day, worldwide!"
-
- "Really interesting", Castle mumbled.
-
- "Oh but it wasn't that either, not in any way! No. When LIKE, our
- largest competitor introduced a new design, our sales went down like
- a banana split at a birthday-party for 8-year olds. We were finished.
- We were bankrupt. We had to close the shop and fire our staff.'
-
- "Uhuh..", "So is that what you wanted me to know?" Castle asked.
-
- "No, it wasn't that! You have to listen to me Castle! Listen good.
- When we moved out, another firm took over, and opened a shoe shop
- at the very same spot, but they also sold computer equipment!
- Joysticks, Harddrives, Printers and so on. One of their employees
- used to work for me. He was somewhat of a hacker you might say.
- Always hanging over the computer, running something they call a
- Bulletin Board System and writing long stories that were greatly
- appreciated around the world. A very fine man indeed. Oh, by the
- way, it's the very same person who is writing this story right now!"
-
- "Really? Well, it seems like he's doing a good job, doesn't it?"
- Castle said with a smile on his face.
-
- "Sure, everything he does usually Is good!"
-
- "So, what have all of this got to do with the man who disappeared
- in the shoe shop?" Castle asked.
-
- "The what?" Steinberg said with a surprised look on his face.
-
- "Listen, you called me and told me to meet you here because you
- had vital information about this case I'm working on. The Man
- who disappeared in a Shoe Store at Regent Street!".
-
- "Hey, I don't know anything about no man disappearing. Aren't you
- from Books International? I was told to meet someone here who would
- print my story!" Steinberg said with doubt in his voice.
-
- Suddenly a man jumped up from behind the trunk. He was about
- 1.93 meters tall, not very thin, and had a large sombrero on his head.
-
- "Steve Castle?" the man said looking at Castle.
-
- "Eh, yes?" Castle replied, slightly chocked.
-
- "Good, I'm Howard Brown. I have some vital information regarding the
- case you're working on. I called you earlier today, remember?" the
- man said and reached out to shake hands.
-
- "But why didn't you show yourself earlier?!" Castle almost screamed
- to Brown.
-
- "Well, I enjoyed Mr. Steinberg's story quite a bit. You didn't want
- me to miss the end did you?!", Brown frowned.
-
- The last Steve Castle saw before he fainted was the beautiful girl
- crawling out of the box, completely naked but with a slice of pizza
- in one hand, offering it to Brown who said he would rather take her
- instead (and did so 2 seconds later).
-
- ______________________________________________________________________
- ______________________________________________________________________
-
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- Watch out for the next chapter of the Castle Chronicles!
- It will be Very revealing! In all directions!
-
- ONLY from The Underground eXperts United!
-
- (!) 1991 THE CHIEF & uXu Productions
-
- ______________________________________________________________________
- ______________________________________________________________________
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