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- ==Phrack Magazine==
-
- Volume Five, Issue Forty-Five, File 11 of 28
-
- ****************************************************************************
-
- Ho Ho Con Miscellany
-
-
- HoHoCon '93 review from the European point of view
- <=====================================================>
-
- This is Onkel Dittmeyer telling you his experiences at
- the HoHoCon, which no-one really gives a @#*! about.
- It might be fun reading anyway.
-
- " Maybe I am just a lumpy coder, but at least my
- dad is not selling WOMEN'S SHOES. "
-
- - Guess Who
-
- I arrived at the con one day too early, before anyone else
- had showed up, and started striving through the
- neighborhood. Well, this looked like fun. The Hilton and the
- Super-8 were, along with a mall and a South Western Bell
- building with light-at-night, wide open, overflowing
- dumpsters situated between highways, a couple miles outside
- of town. Cool. Used to Europe, where there is more public
- transportation than cars on the street, I was kinda stuck in
- there, so I spent my time chatting with the front desk clerk
- of the motel ("Monty? Ahh, ya mean Monty from the hotel
- security? Well, don't spread the word, he has a penis
- problem.."). Everybody was able to confirm this a day
- later during on a police raid, but let's save that for
- later. So stuck between a WAL-MART ("SHOTGUNS! ON SALE! JUST
- $99"), a movie theater and a cheap mall I spent this day
- sipping complimentary tea at the front desk and watching
- Wayne's World 2. ("A Unix Book. Cool.")
-
- On the next day, all kinds of people started to flow in, and
- I spent my time following around various people since I came
- to the con alone, not seeing one familiar face around. I
- bumped into Minor Threat and his trusty friend Mucho plus
- a bunch of other guys trying to fix something with ToneLoc.
- Walking around a little more, I ran into some dudes that
- were busy hacking into the hotel's PBX using its 1200-bps
- line.. Walking over to the Hilton, I found a tone in a wall
- jack and called home. Still talking, hunger overcame me and
- I decided to go to the mall and grab munchies. Walking past
- the Hilton's pool, a kid was trying to fish his scanner out
- of the water. Remember: A PRO-43 does NOT stay afloat! Later
- that night, the whole place was pretty crowded already. It
- was unreal. The lobby was crowded by at least two dozen
- scanner-wielding kids, trying to find the frequency for the
- hotel security. The guards must have been felt pretty
- strange - each time they talked, something like five people
- with frequency counters walked past them. Finally, the word
- spread (466.025/825) and each time some guard started
- talking, it was echoing back over everyone's scanner in a
- two-mile range around the party place. I soon left the 3L3eT pIt
- and hung out with AKA to play some stupid games ("Oh, there
- is a calling card on the floor." "Where??" "You can't see it,
- its eleet!") when we saw red and blue lights in front of the
- Super-8 Motel. Three cop-cars had arrived, and they busted
- an about 14-years old kid for scanning local numbers from
- his motel room. While everybody stood around in front of the
- room where they hold (or ABUSED) the kid, people were
- thinking if this would be legal, arresting and squeezing
- this kid with no lawyer and no parents around, they sped past
- us with their victim, and someone told the kid that it was his
- constitutional right to remain silent until he would get a
- lawyer or at least a parent. And guess: The cops pulled the
- guy out and told him that he should not stand around and
- advise people about their constitutional rights. Quote:
- " This is the manager, this is a police officer, I am the
- security guard. LEAVE! " - "And I will NOT leave." Good
- thing that someone was videotaping the whole thing. So much
- action, and the con hadn't even started. Tired of so eViL
- K-r0cKinG rAcIsM I stumbled to my room and fell asleep on
- some standup comedy on TV. Tomorrow was the con!
-
- The next morning around 9, I found the food court in the
- mall crowded. It seemed like everybody on the con was going
- to eat the last time for his life, or at least the last
- time before the 6-hour Con-A-Thon started. Walking around in
- the empty conference room, some hotel employee asked me
- "HoHoCon? Is this like a Santa Claus meeting or something?"
- Maybe it was just cause I wore a santa-hat. When Drunkfux
- finally started the meeting one hour late I found myself
- squashed in between some system administrator and another
- guy from some three-letter-agency that typed everything that
- was said into his laptop at something like 2.000.000
- characters a second. Scared shitless, I was listening to the
- events, still a little drowsy from very little sleep the
- last night - I only remember Cap'n Crunch talking about
- boxing in Russia (something that interested me, at least),
- and the LOD members talking about some data preservation
- project - if you are interested what in detail was talked
- about, I'm sure Drunkfux will sell you the videotape for a
- couple hundred $. In a break, he was selling merchandise,
- and I think he didn't look more happy during the whole con
- than in the moment everybody was waving with twenty-dollar
- bills.. Phat pockets was also what the LOD guys were looking
- for.. (just in case you don't know: They are collecting old
- message boards and sell the printout for something like $35).
-
- After this sellout session, I found a sign on the wall:
- "hoho.con.com --->", and, in room 260 someone piled up an
- enormous mass of equipment, including something like 4 UNIX
- machines, a SLIP connection, 20" screens, PET's.. Plus, the
- room was stacked with 30-40 people, and I mean STACKED. Most
- people were wasting their time entering commands like
- "mget /warez/eleet/hot/0-day/*.*" Sick of that, I grabbed a
- bunch of people and we went trashing at SW-Bell around the
- block, and whoops! we found a diagram like this:
-
-
- (Europe) (Asia) (Australia)
-
- ______
- ____| |____
- | |
- | Texas o <====== Austin
- \ /
- \ /
- \_________/
-
- (North America) (South America)
-
- Now we know it: South Western Bell believes that Austin, Texas,
- is the center of the world. Well, from the 17th to the 19th of
- December, 1993, it was.
-
- TEN THINGS I LEARNED AT HOHOCON '93
-
- 1. Social-Engineering the front-desk clerk PAYS!
- 2. If you drink 20 cups of complimentary tea, they WILL hassle you.
- 3. If the guard hears his voice over your scanner, he WILL hassle you.
- 4. If you sign on as CLIFF STOLL and pay cash, they WONT hassle you.
- 5. Don't scan from a hotel room. But feel free to hack the PBX.
- 6. Pizza Hut accepts all major credit cards.
- 7. Austin, Texas, is the center of the universe.
- 8. Some people really want room service in a Super-8 Motel.
- 9. A radio shack is not lighter than water nor water-proof.
- 10. Barney is a purple penis.
-
- Shouts to Tr8or and SevenUp: Why didn't you join me?
- Write to onkeld@ponton.hanse.de for further discussion....
-
- ------------------------------------------------------------------------------
-
- Conference Behavior - a Study of the Lame and the Damned
-
- by Holistic Hacker/R2
-
- [This little file was inspired by a talk Phantom Phreaker and I had at
- HoHoCon last year, after some of the stupid shit that went on at it and
- SummerCon. The rough draft was written on my laptop on the flight back
- from Austin.]
-
- It seems some little kids are having problems figuring out how to act
- at the various hacker cons around the country. Hacking has nothing to do
- with how many smoke bombs you can drop in the hotel or how many fire
- extinguishers you steal. If you lamers think that being away from mommy
- for the first time in your life means that you can trash a hotel, then do
- it. By all means make it a local one first, so Mom and Dad can bail your
- sorry ass out of jail.
-
- I get really tired of going to a con and some little punk wants to play
- eleet anarchist and then the cops show. Cons are a chance to learn and/or
- share info, see people, and have a good time. Shit like what has happened
- this last year just isn't needed. All that comes out of stupid actions is
- a bad rap on the "underground." Some friends and I were in the hotel bar
- Saturday night and the bartender was telling us how the hotel people were
- really getting tired of the lame shit.
-
- I was in one room Saturday night, swapping files and talking when the
- smoke alarm went off at 3 AM or so. I bet whoever did it got a real kick
- seeing all of the people up, and he probably creamed his jeans when the
- fire truck showed up. Emergency personnel don't need to waste their time
- on wannabe anarchist weenies, it isn't their job.
-
- Another brilliant soul decided to set off one of the fire extinguishers
- in the Super 8. I saw other jerks trying to wake up the people on the top
- two floors of the Hilton at 2 in the morning. I saw another guy carrying two
- extinguishers off, and he didn't look like hotel staff. Another genius
- tried cutting a hole in the vending machine with a glass cutter. Just
- because it isn't your property means you can trash it. The fucked-up
- elevator control panels, the damaged exit signs, etc. are costs the hotel
- passes on to the customers and to us. Even worse, when the word gets
- out, the hotels don't want the cons back. Why would they want to rent us
- rooms, if they are just gonna get trashed? If this is how you want cons
- to be, then hold your own.
-
- ------------------------------------------------------------------------------
-
- All typos are intentional. The following summary of HohoCon 93
- is based solely upon my perceptions and are subject to the laws of
- physics. Take these comments as you see them.
-
- By Frosty
-
- First off, there was a $5 charge at the door. This also entitled you to
- partake in the raffle offered of lame-to-cool objects. $100 would rig the
- raffle in your favor. One person walked away with a full //e system, and
- another with a 486 system.
-
- The Conference ---
- ------------------
-
- Bruce Sterling - A humorous talk that thrashed virii. Informed us of the #1
- anti-virii person in Russia, Dimitri. Generously gave away
- several copies of "The Hacker Crackdown" on disk.
- Famous quote, "Information wants to be free."
-
- Ray Kaplan - A humorous security consultant. Wants to establish a site for
- security holes to be available. Had a brief Q&A session. Wants
- interaction between the security consultants and hackers. Also
- stressed protecting information and privacy.
-
- Douglas Barnes - Representatives from CypherPunks. Works in cryptography.
- Jim Famous quote, "I want to talk to my lawyer." Another
- quote, "Hackers are requested to call between 9 and 5."
- There are several Fidonet sites not allowing encrypted
- messages to go through. The liability decreases with a
- site allowing encrypted messages. ViaCrypt PGP is the
- legal version of PGP. Another quote, "A triple DES file
- is as good as unbreakable." Pushed the book "Applied
- Cryptography." Working on a digital Credit Union.
- System Administrators are not responsible for passing
- codes. Quote, "The net perceives censorship and routes
- around it."
-
- Grayareas - Made a magazine plug. Looking for information for the 'zine.
-
- Damien Thorn - Works on the 'zine "Nuts and Bolts." Talked about cellular
- tracking and hacking. Informed that a cell hacking program
- can be obtained from mkl@nw.com.
-
- Captain Crunch - Talked on the San Francisco raves and how they utilized
- aka John Draper networking and encryption to get their rave information out.
- Gave history and information on hacking Soviet phones and
- the KGB lines.
-
- Simmion - Attendee from Moscow. Stated there was no evidence of virii being
- highly prolific in Russia. Almost all software is free in Russia.
- Most conferences in Russia are done by BBS's. Russians can not
- afford the high software prices legally.
-
- LOD/Comm - Project information on their Digital Archive project.
- Also, presented a cash donation to the SotMESC to help fund
- a scholarship campaign for those involved in the hacking realm.
-
- Erik Bloodaxe - Conversed about wireless modems and Email networks.
-
- The Omega
- White Knight - gave out copies of a government document on UFO coverups.
-
- Count Zero - Members of the cDc/RDT. Handed out fliers and gave a packet
- Kingpin radio demonstration. Informed they would be coming out with
- the 'Jolly-Roger Dialer' for $80 approx. that would be better
- than the 'Demon-Dialer' offered by Hack-Tic.
-
- Brian Oblivion - Conversed about legalities and the Clipper Chip.
- Informed us that the EFF is not promoting help on court
- cases ( they're too big ). Quoted, "The Internet is the
- collective consciousness of the community." Quoted
- Compuserve that, "The Internet is sewage."
-
-
- Errata
- ------
-
- The Unix at the Super 8 Hotel was hacked.
- Room 293 at the Super 8 was raided the day prior to the conference starting.
- A LAN was set up in 260 at the Super 8 ( Thanks Georgia Tech ).
- Kudos to Annaliza / Torquie for filming the conference for her documentary.
- Kudos to 'Vibe' for giving away free shirts to the public.
- DO NOT leave anything expensive out, it will be stolen !!!
- Kudos to Malicious and his group for being the friendliest hacks.
- Kudos to Grayarea, who will be providing her coverage of the Con.
- The Techno-Porn party the SotMESC sponsored went well through the night.
- Many thanks to the mall-girls that showed up to lend themselves to the masses.
- Cold Pricklies to whoever set the fire alarms off Saturday night.
- A big question mark to whoever acquired the large 30' inflatable balloon.
- Warez Boards -> 214-642-0003 NUP: flying man
- 214-642-1940 / 264-6269 NUP: london run
- 817-551-5404 NUP: none
-
- THE CHEAP-SEX AWARD
- -------------------
- The personnel in room 508 at the Hilton that provided strippers,
- but enforced a door-charge and sex-charge for services.
-
- THE MOST OBNOXIOUS PERSON AT HOHOCON 1993 AWARD
- -----------------------------------------------
- The AT&T person who took pictures of EVERYONE
- in the line going into the conference center.
-
- A Gif of this individual will be provided later =:)
-
- This is just a 'Spur of the Moment' release.
- We look forward to view-points from other sources.
-
- ------------------------------------------------------------------------------
-
- HoHoCon '93 - Out With A Bang January, 1994
- ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
- by Winn Schwartau (Page 8) (Security Insider Report)
-
- The hackers did it again. A monster party, several hundred strong, where
- hacking was the agenda. HoHoCon is the annual hacker's convention in Texas,
- where all hell breaks loose. December 17-19 in Austin was the host of this
- last one.
-
- According to the hackers, it was a great party; the ethernet lines were run
- between rooms; the net was connected, and everyone consumed mass quantities
- of their favorite legal substance or controlled substance. One hacker was
- busted, apparently, for breaking into the hotel's PBX system and dialing the
- Planet Krypton (or some such place) and the cops sat outside the front door
- just in case. In case of what? According to the hotel, in case of crazy
- kids getting too crazy.
-
- This last HoHoCon was the biggest yet; estimates from 250-500 people attending
- to learn about hacking; keep tabs on the hackers; or hack themselves into
- position of respect amongst their peers. One attendee took roll after roll
- of photos of hackers; some hackers got paranoid, others laughed at him hiding
- behind pillars and jumping out to snap a pix. Whatever.
-
- On the other hand, some security professionals who attended were absolutely
- aghast at what they saw; wild kids, with no reins, breaking into computers
- over the net is not fun nor legal. The drug and alcohol consumption was
- too extreme, and the messages and conference sessions somewhat disorganized.
- But, nonetheless, not one person I spoke to said they wouldn't attend again
- next year. So there must be something to it. Even legendary phreaks like
- John Draper aka Captain Crunch were there, despite his tenuous hold on
- reality and emanating odor.
-
- This was the minority, though, and most security pros said they picked up a
- few tricks here and there. HoHoCon next year, the organizers fear, will
- turn legit if too many 'suits' come so they have to promote the event better.
- Next year's HoHoCon won't be held until January of 1995, making attendance
- easier for those who have Holiday conflicts.
-
- We'll keep you informed.
-
- ------------------------------------------------------------------------------
-
- HoHo Con '93
- by Erik Bloodaxe
-
- It was the eve of HoHoCon 93 and I found myself caught in a serious
- dilemma. I had promised to provide this year's "entertainment" yet
- I knew I was going to back out of it. I had received about a million
- emails and chat messages bugging me about the "bondage show" that was
- supposed to transpire that Saturday night and had tried my hardest to
- give them little or no commentary, knowing full well that I was going to
- flake out at the last moment.
-
- So here I was, driving towards the Austin Airport Hilton, trying to come
- up with excuses about why there would be no show to some 300 hormonal
- sociopaths. Every scenario seemed bleak: "Phrack Editor Vivisected!"
- "Hacker Revolt Leaves Three Dead, 15 Wounded." I tried to blow it off,
- consoling myself that no one would really give a shit, and that it was
- only my own ego that demanded that I fulfill the promise of sleeze.
-
- Upon arrival at the Hilton, I was amused to find some 30 or more
- miscreants milling about the lobby, amusing themselves with house phones
- and sordid tales of last week's hack. As usual, there was not a
- payphone to be had, a direct result of the numerous Radio Shack dialers
- on hand (model 43-141).
-
- I mingled somewhat distantly, looking for Chasin, Tcon, Lex, Drunkfux or
- anyone else I needed to talk to. Of course they weren't there. I was
- beginning to wonder how in the hell I could pass the time when I was
- paged by Lex.
-
- Lex Luthor was staying a safe distance from the main fracas. In typical
- Luthorian paranoia, he was determined to not have his name on anything,
- such as car rental or hotel room, so by staying just far enough away he
- hoped to not have his name on any arrest reports either. Lex, Professor
- Falken, Al Capone, Mark Tabas, The Mentor and I were all supposed to
- have dinner that evening. After getting Lex's room information, I took
- off to get Mentor.
-
- Getting everyone together was somewhat of a clusterfuck. Tabas was
- located at the bottom of a 151 bottle, but surfaced in time to grab
- dinner.
-
- During dinner at Baby Acapulco's, as the award-winning waitstaff lost
- most of our orders, Mentor reminisced about some of my more unbalanced
- teenage moments such as: the time I cut the break cables on a Mercedes
- because its owner had made the moves on my evening's female target, the
- knife and gun wielding passout on the railroad tracks, etc. He ended
- with, "You sure have changed. I'm surprised you aren't dead."
-
- I suddenly felt old. It would not be the last time I felt that way that
- weekend.
-
- After dinner I decided to be a jerk and lash out at Tabas for insulting
- my overinflated ego on the net. It accomplished nothing, except to further
- distance ourselves but this evil voice in my head deemed it necessary.
- We agreed to disagree and to try to put aside our numerous past
- problems for the interim, although I doubt either of us believed
- in the resolution.
-
- Once back at the Hilton, things were beginning to heat up. Some hundred
- or more conferees were loitering back and forth from the Hilton to the
- Super 8 next door. I finally managed to hook up with Chasin, Tcon, Koresh
- and Louis Cypher in their room at the Super 8. Lcypher was enjoying what
- would probably be his last taste of freedom, since he was due to ship out
- to federal boot camp the next month.
-
- Sometime thereafter, a score of people began running upstairs with
- computer equipment, laughing to themselves. As would be typical, a short
- time later several police cruisers showed up. The kids had broken into
- a phone closet and ran extra lines to their room to either: a) run a bbs,
- b) wardial the city or hotel, or c) prove once and for all they were the
- dumbest people in attendance. A member of the Austin EFF chapter ran
- about screaming about the rights of the accused. The police told him
- that if he didn't shut up he would be going downtown as well. The
- silence came instantly.
-
- The appearance of police so soon on the first evening made several
- people quite nervous, especially those guests with rather large pupils,
- whose numbers were growing in abundance. They sat in their rooms with
- the lights dimmed (or off) peering out the curtains wondering if the cops
- would be knocking on their doors next.
-
- Word reached us that KevinTX had shown up. In typical flair, Kev had
- blown in straight from Las Vegas where he had just won some $20,000
- playing Blackjack, and was in a very festive mood. Once we reached his
- floor, we were greeted with the sounds of a dozen tropical birds in
- terrible agony. Obviously "the tank" had been filled, and was being
- rapidly drained.
-
- Inside the room black plastic bags lined the floor giving the
- appearance of a recent trashing run, but in reality were the
- victims of an unforgiving blast of n2o. Some Andrew Blake film played
- on the VCR Kevin and his crew had brought, and a new camcorder was being
- erected to capture the planned debauchery on tape.
-
- We asked Kevin how on earth they managed to wheel in a 20 lb tank of
- nitrous through the lobby and up to the room without being questioned.
- Kevin said they put it under a jacket and just walked right through. I
- wondered how long it would be before everyone else began wheeling in
- kegs.
-
- I begged everyone not to put the bags over their heads, as resuscitating
- any potential asphyxiation victim was not in my agenda. (Quick flashback
- to a blue-faced man spasming from oxygen depravation, "No really officer,
- I don't know why he put that bag on his head and went to sleep.")
- Besides, it would be too far to drag a dead body down to the dumpster
- from the hotel room without attracting suspicion.
-
- The tank was drained and the crowd dwindled.
-
- Reflecting upon the altered states of those wandering almost zombie-like
- around the hotels, I decided that if anyone were to be raiding the con
- it should be the DEA rather than the FBI.
-
- I arrived at the con the next morning lugging a box full of my t-shirts,
- ready to make the rent. In the conference room Bruce Sterling was in the
- middle of an incredible rant about the evils of Virii. I don't know what
- the hell he was talking about. I'm not quite sure if anyone did, but
- I got the impression that he got zapped. A note to the kiddies: don't
- copy that floppy!
-
- At the door, dFx was busily commandeering the five dollar "voluntary
- contribution." I asked him how the take was and he whipped out a stack
- of money that would choke an elephant. I asked him for my share
- for being his marketing and advertising rep. The money and dFx disappeared.
-
- Damien Thorn of Nuts & Volts, whose column is the ONLY reason I subscribe,
- took the stand and talked about the magazine and his column. I
- jumped up and asked him about his involvement with Phoenix Rising
- Communications, and suggested they not use the name "The Phoenix
- Project" as their BBS name. Damien seemed somewhat apologetic when
- he said that he didn't realize that it had already been used in the past.
- (Obviously Sterling's book didn't get read by everyone.)
-
- I took off to find out where the casualties from last night were hiding.
- After a lengthy and fruitless search for Chasin, Tcon or KevinTX, I stumbled
- back into the con area just in time to find out that LOD Communications would
- be hitting the podium next.
-
- As we all wandered up front, (we being me, Lex, Tabas, Phantom Phreaker,
- Professor Falken and Al Capone), an explosion of camera flashes shook the
- conference room. It was the most ridiculous thing I have ever been a
- witness to. I felt pretty sorry for Lex, who had managed to avoid
- being photographed as "Lex Luthor" for his entire life, now being the
- target of every butthead with a Nikon in the greater Austin area.
-
- After we rambled about the BBS archive project, I got the chance
- to give one of the worst presentations of my life. I will credit
- some of this to the lack of display technology (mainly overhead projector
- and VGA adaptor) but the main fault was my own. I spoke for a bit about
- wireless wide area networking via commercial packet radio and about
- services such as RadioMail.
-
- Afterwards, Chasin and I introduced White Knight and The Omega who,
- in typical cDc fashion, relayed the further adventures of "America's
- Favorite Hacker: Quentin." At the end of their speech, they offered
- about a dozen copies of Quentin's latest exposure of a government cover-up.
-
- The madcap dash of reporters, hackers and various other would-be
- co-conspirators to grab the sacred printout was like the closing scene
- of "It's a Mad Mad World." The stage rush was not terribly unlike
- my first Metallica concert: people diving over chairs, crawling over
- heads, screaming, arms flailing. The only difference were the
- reporters yelling "Press! Press! I must have a copy!"
-
- The conference wrapped up with attorney Steve Ryan talking about the
- sorry state of computer law.
-
- Bernie Milligan of Communications & Toll Fraud Specialists from Houston
- finally ran out of film. (Bernie, if you recall, was at HoHo '92
- sitting at the back of the room with the Super Ear. I wonder how much
- he gets for the photos. Maybe he just tacks them up on his wall
- and has little fantasy conversations with them as he spanks his monkey.
- I don't know.)
-
- After the speaking was concluded, Weevil wandered over and asked me when
- the bondage show would be going on. I told him that it would not
- be happening. Weevil, still very elated over his rave reviews in
- "Dazed and Confused," looked at me and in a stereotypical Hollywood-esque
- display of confidence said, "Don't worry about it dude. I'll take care of it."
-
- A 17 year old actor and would-be pimp. Yeah, right.
-
- I got shanghaied by John Littman who was working on his book about Kevin
- Poulsen, Agent Steal and friends. We talked for a bit, and I came to
- the following conclusions:
-
- 5 REASONS WHY I AM LIKE AGENT STEAL
-
- 1. We both shared a knack for dating strippers.
- 2. We are both long haired, skinny, aging hackers.
- 3. We both know the value of a carefully placed camcorder.
- 4. We both have been the subject of investigations by the government.
- 5. We both have assisted the government.
-
- 5 REASONS WHY I AM NOT LIKE AGENT STEAL
-
- 1. I have both my original legs.
- 2. I only use Saran Wrap for leftovers.
- 3. I would never dress like any member of Poison.
- 4. I stopped breaking into buildings when I was 14.
- 5. I would never turn in my friends to save my own ass.
-
- That evening as everyone was getting antsy, Frosty popped up with
- his "Techno-Porn." Something like 24 hours of non-stop pornography
- compressed into 6 hours. You'd have to see it to understand.
-
- Everyone seemed to migrate towards 508, most likely a direct result
- of the internal sex & drug divining rods built into the subconscious of
- every attendee. Sometime around 9 or 10 in the evening, Weevil
- showed up parading five very attractive, scantily clad young women.
- The strippers made their way through the lobby of the Hilton evoking
- a Pied Piper effect, dragging hundreds of drooling hackers in their
- wake.
-
- They managed to get into the hotel room unscathed. Outside the room
- the crowds gathered, anxious to get a peek at the girlies.
-
- The girls, meanwhile, got somewhat agitated, looking around at their
- predicament. They had given up their Saturday night shift at Sugar's
- Cabaret (an Austin upscale nudie bar) for the prospect of making some
- easy cash at HoHoCon. Apparently Weevil exaggerated a bit about the
- quality of the attendees in his fervor to coax them back to the hotel.
-
- I, being a take charge kind of guy, asked the girls what they needed,
- took some orders, and announced to the crowd that anyone who did not have
- at least forty dollars needed to get the fuck out. Once word of the
- necessity of money spread among the riot-like crowds swarming the 5th floor,
- they became like Donn Parker's hair and thinned quickly and ultimately
- disappeared entirely.
-
- Zar took over the job of guarding the door and making sure that no one got in
- without showing that they had cash for the girls, and KevinTX rounded up cash
- from within the room and manned the camcorder and radio. After a few beers,
- everyone loosened up and the show began.
-
- Soon, there were topless women everywhere. There were "table-dances"
- happening on the toilet, there were women on the beds, and grinding away
- on the floor in front of a mirror.
-
- It was the kind of thing that I'm sure Dr. Mitch Kabay would be shocked
- and dismayed by, but unfortunately he wasn't in the room. Perhaps
- he didn't have the cash to get in.
-
- Everyone in the room was having a blast. Consultants, reporters, and hackers
- all equally sharing in the debauchery. Zar gave new meaning to the word
- "man-handling." I can only thank God that I had sold all my shirts,
- so I had cash to spare.
-
- The night went on, the beer flowed, the dopamine inhibitors kicked
- in full force, and the money changed hands faster than could be counted.
- By the end of the evening, everyone had received several "table dances,"
- KevinTX had whip marks on his back, Weevil had won my complete admiration,
- and the girls made a small fortune. Each of the dancers walked away with
- over $200 in cash. The biggest winner was a really hot little 18 year-old
- named Cathy who raked in almost $400.
-
- As the night drew to a close, the room emptied, the girls gathered up
- their outfits and made for home, or paired up to go somewhere else.
-
- I awoke Sunday somewhere else. No comment. (I couldn't anyway, since I
- have no recollection.)
-
- So ended HoHoCon.
-
- ---------------------------------------------------------------------------
-
- Additional HoHoCon Reviews:
-
- HoHoCon Review Spring 1994
- ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
- By Netta Gilboa (Gray Areas) (Page 30)
-
- Rising From the Underground March, 1994
- ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
- by Damien Thorn (Nuts & Volts) (Page 100)
-
- ------------------------------------------------------------------------------
-
- (Vibe Magazine & Aasahi Computing to have articles soon)
-
-