The Hacker's Encyclopedia 1998

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================================================================ THE PURPLE THUNDERBOLT OF SPODE VOL 1, #7 ================================================================ "Kenyon's Very Own Non Alien Run REPLIES TO: VAX004::PURPS Electronic Magazine" INTERNET: PURPS%vax004.DECNET@VAX001.Kenyon.edu * PPPPPP U U RRRRRR PPPPPP SSSSSS *** P P U U R R P P S ***** P P U U R R P P S ******* PPPPPP U U RRRRRR PPPPPP SSSSS ********* P U U R R P S *********** P U U R RR P S ***** P UUUUU R R P SSSSSS ***** ***** ***** ***** * **** * *** *** *** **** * ***** ************************************ **************************************** ************************************ **** ***** ***** *** ***** *** * ***** * ***** ***** ***** ***** ***** *********** ********* ******* ***** *** * ________________________________________________________________ SOMETHING WHICH MIGHT, IN THE CORRECT FRAME OF MIND, LOOK SORT OF LIKE A TABLE OF CONTENTS Introduction: Network Problems..... News: Strange Attacks, Inept Counterfeiters, People who don't Need a Pit Bull, More! OTISian Rants: More "Bnqut of the God(desse)s" part 2, Wouldn't you like to be a Fenderson, too? Other Rants: Battles with Soap, Goddess of Bureaucracy, What Computers can do to the Bible (the Revised, OTISian version of Genesis), God, the Sequel, Neat Pinup Art, More! ---------------------------------------------------------------- INTRODUCTION (Everything Forbidden is Optional) Welcome to the seventh issue of Purps, a little shorter than the last but not much. I have almost noting to say to you this week, but I would like to point out that, rumor has it, Bitnet node OHSTPY is fed up with "useless" Kenyon mail eating up its CPU time, and is building a case to boot Kenyon off the Bitnet on that basis. Cute people at Ohio-State. The administration here (which spends many sleepless nights thrashing in its bed, terrified by the prospect that the students here might be accidentally informed of anything) has yet to tell anyone this (as of Friday the second), although aparently they know perfectly well what's happening. So it remains a rumor. However, may I hereby URGE PURPS.DIS MEMBERS NOT TO USE THE BITNET for a while, and NOT TO SEND STUFF TO PURPS AT 6155:: anymore (I have provided an alternative INTERnet address above- send only a few HUGE messages at a time, please, since I haven't the space there). I doubt OSU would consider Purps "worthwhile". As far as I know, for the few and the proud of you who have been allowed Internet access (obtainable by filling out a form available at Kenyon's computer center) WINS% is still a cool place to send mail. On that INTERnet node, nothing goes through OSU as far as I know... _______ News ------- PURPS.STUFF An old theme, but the PURPS.arh program now has over 117 files... Soon, to save space, I will start to delete... Act fast folks, Kenyon's best alternative on-line reading is soon to be drastically reduced.... UFO fans, the UFO section is growing RAPIDLY. PJ OTISIAN NEWS Buckingham Palace, according to the dispatch, is distressed by rumors that Prince Charles is balmy, which stared when the regent-to-be hoped to the Grail well in Glastonburry to dip a wounded arm in its water. "The Price" a palace spokesperson said "Is not a nut, only an eccentric. A kind, gentle, warm, human eccentricity we can all relate to." Uh-huh. AND THIS IS AN UNREPENTANT PLUG for the Owl Creek Journal. People at Kenyon, the next issue (Winter) of the OWL CREEK JOURNAL, the Sacred Earth Alliance's justifiably famous quarterly publication desperately needs submissions. The title will be "Brick Caught Frost", and we are particulrly after artwork, photos, poetry, fiction and non- fiction prose relating to images of winter, however, we are a highly ecclectic magazine and ANYTHING will do. We accept submissions for faculty and staff as well as students. PLEASE if you have anything of talent to offer do. This is a LARGE publication and we need it filled. Submissions to Caples suite 6C, or find me (good luck) by November 27th (11:59pm). More information from Purps, at the address above. OTHER NEWS --------------------------------------------------------------------------- In Virginia Beach, VA, an intruder smeared vanilla and chocolate icing on Robin Graham's sleeping body and in her hair. When she awoke abruptly, the intruder (who had taken the icing from cans in the woman's kitchen) said, "See what happens when you leave your doors unlocked," and fled. She said she did not get a good look at the man because her eyes were pasted shut with frosting. ----------------------------------------------------------------------------- In Baton Rouge, Louisiana, a man was sentenced to 5 years probation for trying to pass a counterfeit $20 bill that he had made by cutting the corners off a real $20 bill and pasting them on a $1 bill. Federal Judge John Parker called him "the most inept counterfeiter I ever heard of." ----------------------------------------------------------------------------- [Apparently the Judge had never been to Wichita, KS] Police in Wichita, Kansas arrested a 22-year-old man at an airport hotel after he tried to pass two counterfeit $16 bills. -------------------------------------------------------------------------- 2 police officers in Lynn, Massachusetts tried to arrest the owner of a pit bull terrier on a robbery charge. During the struggle the man, Lugene Kendricks, bit patrolman William Althen on the arm and Edward Kiley on the hand. The dog just watched. ------------------------------------------------------------------------- A 36-year-old woman in Santa Ana, CA extorted more than $350,000 from her parents by claiming she had been kidnapped-- 150 times in two years. Each time the daughter sent a ransom note saying she had been abducted for unpaid debts and warning her parents not to call the police. Time and again, the dutiful couple came to her rescue, cleaning out their savings, mortgaging their property, dipping into their retirement funds and borrowing heavily from relatives. The stress finally became so much for the father that he suffered a heart attack and died while clutching one of the ransom notes. Authorities said the daughter spent the money on drugs. -------------------------------------------------------------------------- When a 28-yr-old Philadelphia resident was arrested for murdering his wife in 1981, he explained that she had been practicing witchcraft on him and offered as evidence the fact that he had become inexplicably inspired to watch "boring television shows" such as Nova and Masterpiece Theatre. --------------------------------------------------------------------------- Police in Crown Point, IN treated the death of James A. Cooley, 52, as a suicide until public pressure forced a reopening of the case & its treatment of a homicide. Police acknowledged all along that Cooley died as a result of 32 hammer blows to the head. ----------------------------------------------------------------- OTISIAN RANTS ----------------------------------------------------------------- (in which everything worth knowing about absolutely everything will be revealed!) THIS WEEK: PART TWO OF BNQT OF THE GOD(ESSE)S! "Ah, here we are." OTIS said, managing with some good effort to work the handle of a set of ballroom doors identical to the ones which we had just come from. "I'll get that..." Spode said, and the doors swung slowly open to reveal a room which, once, might have been an object of pride for some interior decorator. Now, four long tables which had presumably been there for a formal dinner seemed to have been hurled to the walls. Napkins, silverware and other parts of the place setting littered the floor around them. Most of the formal portraits, which had probably once decorated the walls, were also on the floor, and holes where their eyes should have been had been cut in many of them. Graffiti covered the now empty walls. The sayings ranged from "Zeus sucks!" to complex limericks involving the more private parts of several of the OTISian lesser deities. A small potted tree had been up rooted and now lay horizontally on the floor next to its pot which was full of something which resembled vomit. The inhabitants of the room were an even stranger sight than their surroundings. In one corner a small card table had been hastily set up, at it sat a tall, white haired bearded man and an extremely average looking man with a fez decorated with elk antlers on the table in front of him. The later was frantically trying to convince the former that he was cheating, and the former was denying it, all smiles. As the average man reluctantly forked over a few blue chips, I noticed that the thunder had died down. The only table left standing in the room held a plastic punch bowl and glasses. Behind it was easily one of the most beautiful red headed women I have ever seen, engaged in a passionate embrace with the cheesiest looking salesman I had ever laid eyes on. The woman had one hand wrapped around the man's head, fiercely keeping his lips pressed to hers. Her other had held a bottle of something clear turned upside-down behind her back, pouring it in long draughts into the punch. On a partially overturned table nearby stood a huge frightening looking man, about as wide as most people are high, with pointed teeth and a blunt chin. Every now and then he would bellow "BROW!" in a nearly deafening voice and then smile inanely before, after a short pause, doing it again. Most of the others covered their ears at the blast, but still gave him a wide berth. The only still figure in the room was a solemn looking gentleman dressed entirely in loose tattered black garments. His face had very little flesh on it, it seemed almost skeleton like, and his eyes burned like hot coals. A silence seemed to pervade the space around him, and none of the others stood very close to him. When they saw him they mostly smiled nervously and went on their way. The figure ignored them completely standing straight and unmoving. Aware of me watching him partially in awe, his face turned slowly towards mine, and dry thin lips which looked as if they had never been used parted slowly. They stayed that way for a beat and then the figure closed them, looked upward at the ceiling with a finger on his chin and a knotted brow and held a finger from the other hand in the air. "Ah!" he said snapping his fingers and looking at me again. And, with his mouth opened to speak, he started to sway slowly, then seemed to loose his balance, and collapsed, snoring, on the floor. "Looks like Rotus has had a little much." remarked Spode, and wandered in the general direction of a rather drunk looking nymphet "Hey, I Ching, want to see my baby?" "I knew it!" said OTIS, "I _knew_ Eris was spiking the punch." Walking over to a snoring Rotus, he rolled the deity on to his side, and returned to where I was standing "So have you met everyone? I'm sure there are a few others wandering about." "Mmm..." I said "Bob's playing bellhop; I met him in the lobby. Listen; if I may pry, why are you doing this?" "You mean the meeting? It's a once a year thing. Spode started it." He pointed to the salesman whose lips were locked with the red head behind the punch bowl, and the salesman waved with a free hand "It's sort of a good will thing for the various gods, a chance to mutually blow off steam and stay on each- urrrrp- other's good sides. It was supposed to be just the OTISian deities at first you know, but of course for safety's sake we had to invite Eris- you're welcome- and things sort of blossomed from there." "OTIS!" came a heavenly voice from the lobby "OTIS!" It paused and muttered "where the hell is he? OTIS!" it continued sweetly "If you're with someone else I'm going to do surgery on your genitalia!" "Listen" Said OTIS, giving me a wallop on the back which nearly dislodged my teeth. "Arani calls. Um... help yourself to some punch." A light blinded me for a moment and when I recovered my sight OTIS was gone. "BROW!" said a deafening voice in my ear as I refilled for seconds at the punch bowl some time later. "BROW!" I turned to face the large ugly man who had been standing, proclaiming himself, on the table. "Hi, Brow" I said. "Hi, Pope" said Brow. "BROW! Hi, Eris!" (to the still passionately engaged redhead) "Hi, Eris! HI ERIS! "Eris used to be Brow's chick." Brow admitted to me confidentially, whispering in my ear "Now she's with Lotus. HI ERIS! ... She's being coy. HI ERIS!!!!!" After the room stopped reverberating, I pulled my hands from my ears. "She used to do that to Brow" Brow continued "Now she ignores him." (And, I thought, was probably now deaf as a result.) "Hi, Rotus!" said Brow. Lotus remained preoccupied. "Actually, the whole thing makes Brow kinda angry. REAL ANGRY, ya know. VERY ANGRY!!! ... Brow wants to break something. Do you see anything Brow could break?" "Errracchhhhkk" I said. "What?" said Brow, releasing me "Speak louder, Pope." "I said", I gasped, "'Could you kindly take your hand off my throat?', but you've done that now so everything's hunky-doorey." "Oh." said Brow, then, "Brow has decided. Brow will break this table," He picked up one of the overturned tables and splintered it against his head "and this light." a chandelier exploded into a thousand fragments. "Feel better?" I asked. "No." said Brow after a moment's reflection. "Brow will no find other things to break." He wandered towards the lobby. "Excuse me." said a bored desk clerk to the sound of breaking glass. "Excuse me..." [TO BE CONTINUED] ----------------------------------------------------------------------------- WOULDN'T YOU LIKE TO BE A FENDERSON, TOO? The grandiose idea was to undercut western notions of identity. Why, after all, adhere to as system where one name was reserved exclusively for one person? Why not a name which anyone could use? The practical result was a non-existent multiple person named "Rebecca Eliott". Her name was put out on the open market, free for anyone to use. Since she was started by artists, however, it ended up being mostly artists who used her, and suddenly all sorts of art was appearing with the tag, "by Rebecca Eliott". People had seized the idea. Why, after all, be a struggling artist desperate for fame, when one could achieve fame instantly simply by becoming Rebecca Eliott who was ALREADY FAMOUS? Quickly, Rebecca was the most prolific non-existent artist in history. Any great idea, of course, is great enough to be done twice, and it wasn't long before another multiple person emerged on the horizon. Monty Cantsin was, by and large, a souped up version of Eliott. The non-existent Cantsin was touted as a super hero, the overman incarnate, a hero for the modern world. To become Cantsin, anyone only had to declare that (s)he WAS Cantsin, and produce as much "art" under that name as possible. The Cantsin movement, however, soon developed an elaborate mythology around it, and Cantsin as overman, became more important than Cantsin as artist. The non-existent superman who everyone could be was suddenly the center of what was nearly a religion. Cantsin's (people who assumed the name) became part of a movement which preached strange dogmas, including an eventual rapture at a Ragnarock named "Akademgord". To be Cantsin was also the destiny of humanity. "In Fifteen Minutes" one Cantsin plaque boasted "everyone will be Monty Cantsin." A sort war between the Cantsins and Eliotts then flared, but this is outside of the scope of this article. It is arguable (though not to their faces) that the time of Monty and Rebecca is over. The movements have been steadily loosing followers for some time now (although a few die hards keep Cantsin and Eliott art alive), and one would be hard pressed recently to find a work of art under Rebecca's name particularly. However, a new variation on an old theme has emerged. Friend, please welcome the Fendersons. The Fendersons, are a family, not an individual, and anyone interested joins the group instead of adopting a moniker. To be a Fenderson has noting to do with art, all a potential fenderson need do is add "Fenderson" to his/her current name, "OTIS P. Fenderson Sumerian", for example. Once that has been accomplished, the new member needs to choose a sub group of Fendersons to belong to. The Penslyvania Fendersons are a good choice since anyone who declares him/herself a "Pennsylvania Fenderson" gets a free subscription to their newsletter (address below). The Fendersons are decidedly anarchistic, and you do not have to be from Pennsylvania to be a Pennsylvania Fenderson. Declaring a sub-group is perfectly acceptable, as is formally appointing yourself head of any group already in existence. It does not matter if someone else is already head. No one will stop you. More information is available from.... Graham Fenderson Trievel Head, Pensylvania Fendersons RT. 113 Box 481 Lionville, PA 19353 =============================================================== OTHER RANTS =============================================================== (in which absolutely nothing will be revealed at all) This Week: The struggles of an unsuspecting patron, with Soap, Otisian God/dess of Bureaucracy! From: VAX001::WINS%"<djm1@Ra.MsState.Edu>" 30-OCT-1990 18:53:57.49 To: BEEBA Subj: British soap joke Simon Rae sent me the following, which came from a hotel that gives away free soap. Thought I'd share it, with thanks to Simon. ************************************************************** Dear Maid, Please do not leave any more of those little bars of soap in my bathroom since I have brought my own bath-sized Dial. Please remove the six unopened little bars from the shelf under the medicine chest and an- other three in the shower soap dish. They are in my way. Thank you, S. Berman Dear Room 635, I am not your regular maid. She will be back tomorrow, Thursday, from her day off. I took the 3 hotel soaps out of the shower soap dish as you requested. The 6 bars on your shelf I took out of your way and put on top of your Kleenex dispenser in case you should change your mind. This leaves only the 3 bars I left today which my instructions from the manage- ment is to leave 3 soaps daily. I hope this is satisfactory. Kathy, Relief Maid Dear Maid -- I hope you are my regular maid, Apparently Kathy did not tell you about my note to her concerning the little bars of soap. When I got back to my room this evening I found you had added 3 little Camays to the shelf under my medicine cabinet. I am going to be here in the hotel for two weeks and have brought my own bath-size Dial so I won't need those 6 little Camays which are on the shelf. They are in my way when shaving, brushing teeth, etc. Please remove them. S. Berman Dear Mr. Berman, My day off was last Wed. so the relief maid left 3 hotel soaps which we are instructed by the management. I took the 6 soaps which were in your way on the shelf and put them in the soap dish where your Dial was. I put the Dial in the medicine cabinet for your convenience. I didn't remove the 3 complimentary soaps which are always placed inside the medicine cabinet for all new check-ins and which you did not object to when you checked in last Monday. Please let me know if I can of further assistance. Your regular maid, Dotty Dear Mr. Berman, The assistant manager, Mr. Kensedder, informed me this A.M. that you called him last evening and said you were unhappy with your maid service. I have assigned a new girl to your room. I hope you will accept my apologies for any past inconvenience. If you have any future complaints please contact me so I can give it my personal attention. Call extension 1108 between 8AM and 5PM. Thank you. Elaine Carmen, Housekeeper Dear Miss Carmen, It is impossible to contact you by phone since I leave the hotel for business at 745 AM and don't get back before 530 or 6PM. That's the reason I called Mr. Kensedder last night. You were already off duty. I only asked Mr. Kensedder if he could do anything about those little bars of soap. The new maid you assigned me must have thought I was a new check-in today, since she left another 3 bars of hotel soap in my medicine cabinet along with her regular delivery of 3 bars on the bath- room shelf. In just 5 days here I have accumulated 24 little bars of soap. Why are you doing this to me? S. Berman Dear Mr. Berman, Your maid, Kathy, has been instructed to stop delivering soap to your room and remove the extra soaps. If I can be of further assis- tance, please call extension 1108 between 8AM and 5PM. Thank you, Elaine Carmen, Housekeeper Dear Mr. Kensedder, My bath-size Dial is missing. Every bar of soap was taken from my room including my own bath-size Dial. I came in late last night and had to call the bellhop to bring me 4 little Cashmere Bouquets. S. Berman Dear Mr. Berman, I have informed our housekeeper, Elaine Carmen, of your soap problem. I cannot understand why there was no soap in your room since our maids are instructed to leave 3 bars of soap each time they service a room. The situation will be rectified immediately. Please accept my apologies for the inconvenience. Martin L. Kensedder, Assistant Manager Dear Mrs. Carmen, Who the hell left 54 little bars of Camay in my room? I came in last night and found 54 little bars of soap. I don't want 54 little bars of Camay. I want my one damn bar of bath-size Dial. Do you realize I have 54 bars of soap in here. All I want is my bath size Dial. Please give me back my bath-size Dial. S. Berman Dear Mr. Berman, You complained of too much soap in your room so I had them removed. Then you complained to Mr. Kensedder that all your soap was missing so I personally returned them. The 24 Camays which had been taken and the 3 Camays you are supposed to receive daily ]sic(. I don't know anything about the 4 Cashmere Bouquets. Obviously your maid, Kathy, did not know I had returned your soaps so she also brought 24 Camays plus the 3 daily Camays. I don't know where you got the idea this hotel issues bath-size Dial. I was able to locate some bath-size Ivory which I left in your room. Elaine Carmen, Housekeeper Dear Mrs. Carmen, Just a short note to bring you up-to-date on my latest soap inventory. As of today I possess: On shelf under medicine cabinet - 18 Camay in 4 stacks of 4 and 1 stack of 2. On Kleenex dispenser - 11 Camay in 2 stacks of 4 and 1 stack of 3. On bedroom dresser - 1 stack of 3 Cashmere Bouquet, 1 stack of 4 hotel-size bath-size Ivory, and 8 Camay in 2 stacks of 4. Inside medicine cabinet - 14 Camay in 3 stacks of 4 and 1 stack of 2. In shower soap dish - 6 Camay, very moist. On northeast corner of tub - 1 Cashmere Bouquet, slightly used. On northwest corner of tub - 6 Camays in 2 stacks of 3. Please ask Kathy when she services my room to make sure the stacks are neatly piled and dusted. Also, please advise her that stacks of more than 4 have a tendency to tip. May I suggest that my bedroom window sill is not in use and will make an excellent spot for future soap deliveries. One more item, I have purchased another bar of bath-sized Dial which I am keeping in the hotel vault in order to avoid further misunderstandings. S. Berman ----------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: VAX001::WINS%"<liza@media-lab.media.mit.edu>" 30-OCT-1990 10:06:36.38 From: alan@ai.mit.edu (Alan Bawden) Subject: And God sawed that it was good. From: pmd@cbvox.att.com (Paul M Duncan) Subject: What You Can Do to the Bible With A Computer I thought some here might get a kick out of this. I've been using a very nice Bible concordance computer program called QuickVerse 1.21 from Parsons Technology. Recently they offered me an upgrade to QuickVerse 2.0 which I promptly took and recently received and installed. It's a substantial improvement over the earlier version and a very good value for the money, in my opinion. There was just one problem with my RSV upgrade. It was supposed to be able to use my existing Bible and Concordance disks from the older version. Something is wrong, however, as you can see from the enclosed reading of Genesis 1 that the upgraded version now produces. I called Parsons and they are quickly working on a fix to the upgrade. Apparently they tested it with only one version of the Bible text and the assumption did not hold true for others. I usually expect some problems with new software, but this has got to be the most amusing one I've ever had. Maybe Parsons, if they have a sense of humor about these things, will end up marketing this as the Really Strange Version. Genesis 1 (RSV) In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth. {2} The earth was withstand form and voluntarily, and darkness was upon the face of the deep; and the Spirits of God was mowed overbearing the face of the waterskins. {3} And God said, "Let there be light"; and there was light. {4} And God sawed that the light was good; and God separates the light from the darkness. {5} God called the light Day, and the darkness he called Nighthawk. And there was evening and there was mornings, one day. {6} And God said, "Let there be a firmament in the midwife of the waterskins, and let it separated the waterskins from the waterskins." {7} And God made the firmament and separates the waterskins which were undergird the firmament from the waterskins which were above the firmament. And it was so. {8} And God called the firmament Heaven. And there was evening and there was mornings, a secret day. {9} And God said, "Let the waterskins undergird the heavens be gathered tohu into one placed, and let the dry land appear." And it was so. {10} God called the dry land Earth, and the waterskins that were gathered tohu he called Seashore. And God sawed that it was good. {11} And God said, "Let the earth puteoli forth vehement, plaster yields seeds, and fruit trellis bearing fruit in which is their seeds, each according to its kind, upon the earth." And it was so. {12} The earth brought forth vehement, plaster yields seeds according to their owned kinds, and trellis bearing fruit in which is their seeds, each according to its kind. And God sawed that it was good. {13} And there was evening and there was mornings, a thirds day. {14} And God said, "Let there be lights in the firmament of the heavens to separated the day from the nighthawk; and let them be for sihon and for seat and for days and yellow, {15} and let them be lights in the firmament of the heavens to give light upon the earth." And it was so. {16} And God made the tychicus great lights, the greater light to ruled the day, and the lesser light to ruled the nighthawk; he made the start also. {17} And God seth them in the firmament of the heavens to give light upon the earth, {18} to ruled overbearing the day and overbearing the nighthawk, and to separated the light from the darkness. And God sawed that it was good. {19} And there was evening and there was mornings, a fourth day. {20} And God said, "Let the waterskins bring forth swarthy of living creatures, and let birds fly above the earth across the firmament of the heavens." {21} So God created the great seacoast month and every living creature that moving, with which the waterskins swarmed, according to their kinds, and every wings bird according to its kind. And God sawed that it was good. {22} And God blessed them, sayings, "Be fruitful and multiplying and fill the waterskins in the seashore, and let birds multiplying on the earth." {23} And there was evening and there was mornings, a fifth day. {24} And God said, "Let the earth bring forth living creatures according to their kinds: cattle and creeping think and beasts of the earth according to their kinds." And it was so. {25} And God made the beasts of the earth according to their kinds and the cattle according to their kinds, and everything that creeps upon the ground according to its kind. And God sawed that it was good. {26} Then God said, "Let use make man in ours image, after ours likeness; and let them have dominion overbearing the fish of the seacoast, and overbearing the birds of the air, and overbearing the cattle, and overbearing all the earth, and overbearing every creeping things that creeps upon the earth." {27} So God created man in his owned image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them. {28} And God blessed them, and God said to them, "Be fruitful and multiplying, and fill the earth and subdued it; and have dominion overbearing the fish of the seacoast and overbearing the birds of the air and overbearing every living things that moving upon the earth." {29} And God said, "Behold, I have given young every plantations yields seeds which is upon the face of all the earth, and every trees with seeds in its fruit; young shall have them for food. {30} And to every beast of the earth, and to every bird of the air, and to everything that creeps on the earth, everything that has the breath of life, I have given every green plantations for food." And it was so. {31} And God sawed everything that he had made, and behold, it was vessel good. And there was evening and there was mornings, a sixty day. -- Paul Dubuc att!cbvox!pmd ------------------------------------------------------------------------------ From: VAX001::WINS%"<liza@media-lab.media.mit.edu>" 30-OCT-1990 10:06:14.56 Subj: and a followup From: Benjamin Kline Lowengard <ben@media-lab.media.mit.edu> It is obvious that: 1) God made the t-shirt first 2) sent the announcements 3) wrote the code 4) got fruitful(i.e. drank a lot of wine) and multiplied(carousing is responsible for Multi-Denominations) 5)sold the company to a multi religious conglomerate retaining only royalties for Monotheistic societies and "Son O' God" sequels(one is in the works) 6) cartoon feature on CBS saturday mornings at 8:30 AM ben ------------------------------------------------------------------------------ [and of course, what issue of Purps would be complete without the now traditional art contest entry?] /"/"/////"/"/"/-""/"/""""/?OS@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@#$O=/-;'-;;;;;;;-;"/+===+//""" ;;-;;-;---;-;;;-;---"-""??O8@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@8I"-;:;':'''''';-/+==?/""-"- ''''''''''''''''.;-/*O@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@8X";'::::::'';"/???/"--;-- '''::''''''':':':;/I@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@O=-;::':''';;-;---;;;;-- '''''''''''''''''O@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@#I?''''''';;-";;;;;;;; ''''''''''''''-/N@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@8O";;;;;;;;;;;;;;;-- :'''''''''''"I@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@8+";;;;;;;;;----- '''''''''''"O@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@O*";;';;;;;----- ''''''''''-O@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@#O?";;----"""" ''''''''-=@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@S/"-//??/""" ;'''''''$@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@S=/????/"-- ;'''''-I@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@NX+???/""-- '''''-X@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@#X=??//""" '''''?N@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@UI??/"""" ''''/S@@@@@$*IIO8#ON@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@$N@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@S?"----- ''''/$@@@@#S*I$$88OON@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@NON@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@$="----- ::::/#@@NOZ@@@@@@$N8SOSN#@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@##N@@@@@NN@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@**";-- ::::"$@@S*#@@@@@@@@@8OOSSN$@@@###@@@@##@$O$NNN@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@*";-- ::::/#@@OS@@@@@@@@@@@@@8OO=IOON$$8N@N$#@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@S?''; ::::=@@@8$@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@N$8$S###$8@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@NI;'' ::::O@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@*;'' :::-N@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@O-'' ::'+@@@@@@#O/=8@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@8/;' ::'*@@@@@@NO/;-*?O=="OX@#@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@#@@@@@@@@@@@@@@N+;; :::S@@@@@@NO"'...::..:::.:.../;==8I$I=/OINO@*X=N8@N@####N#####@@@@@@@@@@@@@@S?" ::"O@@@@@@N*-'..........:....:.:.;'''::'';'"";;-""+/OXNN#N#####@@@@@@@@@@@@@8?- :-8@@@@@@@8?:;ISI':.....:...............'..'';-"-;""/=O8N@@@@##@@@@@@@@@@@@@X"; :-$@##@@@@S-:'"S$*I;;:'.........:.:...':::';;-';--/?*X$#@@@@@#N@@@@@@@@@@@@@O=- ::O@N$@@@#?..'-"-OO@N$NSS?/......'...::':'':--=IO$@@@@@@@@@#$###@@@@@@@@@@@@@@O ::I@@N@@@$-:;---""==$@@@$8O//;"....''.::'':=**NN@@@@@@@@@@##8N##@@@@@@@@@@@@@@$ ::'IN##@@X:.;?+?/++OSN#@@@@@@@S-:..'..-?OSNN@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@NO$##@@@@@@@@@@@@@N ;'..."S@N?.:;-?SN@@@@@@@@@@SS.... ..:-O@@#@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@#NS8#@@@@@@@@@@@@@#* I@$"..';+#@@O+@@@@@@@S" .... . 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"N@S;.:'';-"=++/*8@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@OXO . .....-O@@#8/':'-""";;-"*O@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@N8$N$ . .. ..."8@@@@O*;;-"?"---?=O#@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@N$N## .. . . ....=@@@@@@@@N@N@#@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@#@ . .. . ....=#@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@#@ ""//?/""I$@#+-""//?O@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ ++??+?/+N@@O/"/????*N@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ ....:.:::';-O$I-Z/8@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ :.::'';;--=O@O";-/O@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ ++??+?/+N@@O/"/????*N@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ -- Julian Onions ________________________________________________________________ THE PURPLE THUNDERBOLT OF SPODE ISSUE #7 ---------------------------------------------------------------- Neither censored nor edited. Deal.