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- =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
- - P.I.S.S. Philez Number 51 =
- = -
- - Mindless Phone Tricks =
- = -
- - by Phantom Operator =
- =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
-
-
- Phantom Operator (phanop)'s
- Mindless Phone Tricks
-
- <PREFACE>
- Some people asked me what I do in my spare time when I'm bored as hell and
- have nothing but a phone to play with. So, by popular demand, here is some
- favorite silly phone tricks you can do, much in the spirit of the PLA Issue
- entitled similarly.
- </PREFACE>
-
- * What's your favorite scary movie? *
-
- (You need a cellular phone for this trick)
-
- This is one of my favorites, just pick a payphone (preferably one thats
- inside), get the number off it, and go somewhere where you can see who
- answers but they can't easily see you. You can also have a partner to
- help with the identifying. I usually use one inside a popular area
- cafeteria. Call up the phone, and you (or your partner) goes and looks
- to see who it is. Then when they answer talk to them, including their
- name. This is actually kind of freaky. Talk about the clothes they are
- wearing, etc. If you don't know them, talking about clothes or something
- that you both can see works well also. Laugh at their beweilderment.
- If you get bored, instruct them to turn your head and look at you, or,
- go up to them with your cell phone, talking, until they get the picture.
-
- * It's stuck! *
-
- (Pick a redbox capable phone for this... duh)
-
- Make a phone call to the president or something far away, whatever.
- Screw up your redbox so that the operator comes on. Then hold down
- the quarter button. Yell that its stuck. Hit the payphone a few
- times, let go of your redbox, and tell the nice lady it dropped in.
- You sometimes have to do this more than once, operators usually hangup
- when they hear the "Stuck" quarter. This is an example call, not very
- funny, but still worth the trouble.
-
- <ring>
- Op: please deposit $3.00 for the first three minutes
- Me: ok... hold on, let me get some quarters
-
- <beepbeepbeepbeepbeepbeepbeepbeepbeepbeepbeepbeep>
-
- Me: it's stuck in the phone!!
-
- <i hit the phone a few times>
-
- Me: there, it dropped in. how much more do I need now?
- Op: sir, what you just did there is illegal.
- Me: what? i didn't damage the phone... i promise!
- Op: no, I know exactly what a red pack does
- Me: a red pack? what does a red pack do?
- Op: it makes free phone calls. that's fraud, and i'm going to get
- the cops to go out there and arrest you
- Me: nah, i don't think that would be good
- Op: you little smartalecks, always thinking you can get away with
- everything...
- Me: ma'am, it's ok, i'm a card carying PISS member
-
- <click>
-
- I don't know where she got that red pack idea... Oh well
-
- * How's sales? *
-
- Places like Walmart and Radio Shack really love having demo cellular
- phones with all the new technologies such as digital PCS, etc. Go
- and collect the numbers, unless you're a total dumbass, you should be
- able how to get the demo phone to tell you its number. On most digital
- phones you need to hit "Menu", then press the number that goes with
- "Display", then there should be an option for "My Phone Number". Pretty
- simple. (Radio Shack of Waxahachie TX's cell demo number is 972-333-0410).
-
- Anyway, you can call these poor folks and harrass them constantly, I don't
- know who pays those cellular bills... Oh well. Also, if they leave
- them unattended like Radio Shack often does, they do make calls, most don't
- ask for a unlock number or anything (Walmart usually locks the phones tho).
-
- * This is _really_ gonna cost you... *
-
- My cellular phone is mine and stuff, so when I prank people I don't bother
- blocking caller ID or any of that crap, when people call you back from
- calling them it's a prime opportunity for harrassment. One of my favorites
- is to call people that I know have CID and yell Roy alot and be otherwise
- generally annoying. When they call back, put on your best Abu Far Eastern
- accent...
-
- <ring>
- Me: helo, you have reached a roaming GTE cellular phone. this call costs
- $5.50 per minute, if you do not wish to incurr charges, please hangup
- now. otherwise wait on the line
- Him: $5.50!?
- Me: Yes sir, i've begun billing now
-
- <click>
-
- no-one has been persistent enough to "accept" charges, but if they do,
- you can just laugh at how much the call is "costing" them, and they'll
- probably just curse at you and hangup anyway.
-
- * Ping? Pong! *
-
- Call a big company, ask about their extensions... Most places will tell
- you if you ask nicely. Call back, enter, say, extension 100. Ask
- to be transferred to extension 101. Ask the nice lady working 101 to
- transfer you to 102, then ask for 103, etc. After about 105, loop back
- to 100 again until someone yells at you. This works especially well at
- places that have people working side by side, cause they can see each
- other doing the transfers...
-
- * Split Personality *
-
- This used to be nice to do to OCI, maybe this is why they won't make
- collect calls anymore except from their payphones?
-
- Anyway, turn on your 3r33t haxx0r cell phone and dial 0. Ask the nice
- operator to make a collect call, give them your cell phone number.
- Your phone will start ringing... Pick up your cell and (make sure to
- sound exactly the same as you did), talk to the nice operator. She'll
- get pretty mad that you're the same person. Heh :) I actually got
- an AT&T operator to swear at me doing this.
-
- Me: i'd like to make a collect call please
- Op: i need the number, area code first please.
- Me: 972-xxx-xxxx
- Op: what's your name?
- Me: Pimp Daddy Roy
- Op: sir?
- Me: you heard me, Pimp Daddy Roy
- Op: please hold...
-
- <my phone starts ringing, i torture the op by letting her hear that
- through the payphone mouthpiece>
-
- <i pick up my phone finally>
-
- Me: hello
- Op: I have a collect call from a Pimp Daddy Roy, will you accept
- charges?
- Me: Pimp Daddy? Hmm.... he sounds kinda cool, what do you think?
- Op: you fucking bastard, what do you think the phone is, your toy?
- Me: i'll send you a PISS postcard if you tell me your address
-
- <click>
-
- * Ancient Chinese Stupidity Torture *
-
- Sad to say, but this is inspired from actual events. I used to work
- for a help line, and sometimes we'd get these ridiculously stupid
- people... anyway....
-
- pull up one of those web pages out there with those "tech support"
- phone call transcripts, the real dumb ones. call up your local
- hillbilly dumbfuck computer store and give them some of the stupidest
- crap... eventually they'll cry.
-
- <CLOSING>
- okay, thats enough for now, i've probably inspired a whole new group
- of people to annoy the hell out of their fellow citizens. have fun
- oh, and a stupid Linux trick before you leave... ps aux is lame... if you
- are k-rad you should type
-
- ps auxuauxuauxuxauxauxuaxuaxuaxuaxuaxuaxuauxauxauxauxuxuxuxxuxuxauauxuauxa
-
- it looks so much more wizardly :)
-
- - phanop "pUd ROY!? what have you been smoking?"
-
- </CLOSING>
-
- ----------------------------------------------------------------------
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-
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-
- Contributors-
- Sameer Ketkar
- The Axess Phreak
-
- PISS, the author, and anyone else does not take responsibility for what
- you do with the stuff contained in this file. If you get busted,
- don't cry to us. We don't care. We have never done any of this.
- Really. And we don't condone it. Uh-huh.
-
- Want more stuff? Go to http://piss.home.ml.org
-
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-
- ⌐ Copyright 1998 PISS Publications and also copyrighted by the author.
- This file may be posted freely as long as this notice stays on the end.
- All rights reserved. Or something like that.
-