The Hacker's Encyclopedia 1998/hackers_encyclopedia.iso/zines/extra/ibft_017.txt

Text File | 2003-06-11 | 12.5 KB | 333 lines

_____________________________________________________________________________
---------------------------- I Bleed for This? ------------------------------
------05.25.94-----------------------------------------------------#017------

                       A Man Called Tyler: 100% Love
                        Appreciated by Jason Farnon


Although I was going to write an introduction, this sums it up perfectly:


For some delightful ridicule at the expense of yet another priapic redneck
male who still can't figure out why he can't laid in reality, Castellan,
resident, and Catfish present:

                      _A Man Called Tyler: 100% Love_

---------------------------------
IRC log started Fri Apr 22 03:29
*** Value of LOG set to ON
<shygirl> yes she says she wants to have netsex or something
> Hello Tyler. :)
<Tyler> how are u?
<shygirl> hi jennn!!!!!!!!!
<Tyler> are u really female?
> I feel wonderful, Tyler.  A little tired, maybe.  Sore neck.
<shygirl> what else woud i be??????
*Catfish* so what are you two plotting? :)
> Hiya shygirl!
*** Revolver (~[e-mail]) has joined channel #tyler
<Tyler> shygirl; I don't know..
> Tyler: Of course, silly.
*shygirl* Logging this. Whatta dip.
<Revolver> hi, what's this channel about?
*** Mode change "+snti" on channel #Tyler by Tyler
<Revolver> (I hope I'm not intruding)
*** Revolver has been kicked off channel #tyler by Tyler (Tyler)
-> *Catfish* Making it up as we go along.  Apparently Cast has already included me in the plot without me knowing. :D
<shygirl> help ima being flooded
<Tyler> ok honey
*Catfish* hee hee hee.  Are you luring someone in or what?
<Tyler> honey: what do u want to do?
-> *shygirl* Yeah, I started a log, too.
<shygirl> i want something hot
> Tyler: Well, I'm kinda new to this.  I feel so embarrassed.
<Tyler> well I got one fo ryou shygirl
<Tyler> thatsl ok
<Tyler> that's ok
<Tyler> are u both in your room?
-> *Catfish* We already have a live one here.
<shygirl> honey, i thot you said you had don
<shygirl> tyler,yeah
*Catfish* you guys are good ;)
<Tyler> are u jenn?
<shygirl> i'm tami
<Tyler> I know
<Tyler> tami and jenn
> shygirl, don isn't here, is he?  *smile*
*shygirl* Whadda fuckwit. Bet he can't even find the right hole. ;D
<shygirl> i meant done this b4
<shygirl> jenn is funny - i ma nervous
<shygirl> i just took my underwear off
<Tyler> honey: are u in your room?
<shygirl> don't look at me jenn! :)
<Tyler> good
* honeypot peeks
> hehehehehe
<shygirl> hey!!! :)
* Tyler is looking straight at tami's bush
<shygirl> blush
-> *shygirl* Damn.  Nice recovery!  I owe you a beer.
* shygirl shygirl blushes
* Tyler pulls out his cock
> ooooooo!
<shygirl> ooh1 it's so red
* honeypot blushes
<Tyler> and big
<Tyler> =)
> can i touch it?
<shygirl> wow
<Tyler> it is already hard
<Tyler> of course
> mmmmmmm.  it's so warm!
<Tyler> take your cloth off...both of you
<Tyler> yeah
<shygirl> i just took my bra off. jenn is jealous of my big tits
<shygirl> 36D
> velvety... smooth...
* Tyler goes down on tami while he lets jenn play with his cock
<shygirl> Ohhhhhhhhhh
* shygirl fingers her wet hole
> shygirl, I'll make you pay for that!
<Tyler> finger yourself girls!
<Tyler> honey: suck me
* honeypot rubs herself feverishly!
*shygirl* AHAHAHAHAHAH how does one "play with his cock" when he's going down on me??? Incompetent buffoon.
<Tyler> are u guys really doing it?
* shygirl licks and sucks tyler till hemoans
<Tyler> ummm
<shygirl> tyler, itss hadr to type
*Catfish* are you just msg'ing or what? :)
<Tyler> i know
* honeypot gently tongues Tyler's crown. mmmmm
<shygirl> what r u doing to me
* Tyler bites on tami's clit gently
*shygirl* ROTFL
<shygirl> ooohhh
* Tyler fingers jenn at the same time
-> *Catfish* No, it's on channel.  Cast and I both are keeping logs.
<shygirl> jenn, i think i'm cummin don't look
*Catfish* *snicker*
<Tyler> cum in my mouth!
<Tyler> cum for me!
* shygirl cums in tylers mhthiudsr
<Tyler> hop on jenn
> Tyler, i love the taste of your hot cock!
<Tyler> I love the way u suck me, jenn
-> *shygirl* I bet this guy has a few traumatized hamsters sitting in a cage at home.
<Tyler> ride me jenn
*shygirl* Obviously, this man has never had sex. Fortunately, I'd never inflict him on a woman. :D
<shygirl> ooooh
* Tyler fondles tami's huge tits
> Tyler, I want you to take me from behind...
<shygirl> oooh!!
<Tyler> ok
<shygirl> i like it when you lick my big red nipples
<Tyler> get on your fours
* honeypot gets on her hands and knees...
* Tyler bites on tami's nipples
<shygirl> oooohhh!
* Tyler grabs jenn's ass and slams into her
<shygirl> itsss hrd to type i am getting all wett
-> *Catfish* Oh man, is this one a winner.
<Tyler> that's ok tami
*shygirl* What a gimp. An ass man.
*** Tyler is [e-mail] (*Unknown*)
*** on channels: @#Tyler
*** on irc via server dewey.cc.utexas.edu (UT's "I Repeat Class" server)
*shygirl* :D
> Oooooo, baby!  You know how I like it!
* Tyler starts fucking jenn slowly and gradually faster
> Uh-huh.... mmmmmmmm
<shygirl> oih fuck me fuck me you long hard stud!!
*Catfish* uh oh :)  Did you get the /whois?  That goes extra humiliation points :)
<Tyler> my 7  incher coming in adn out of jenn's pussy]
-> *Catfish* Did it right before you asked. ;)
<Tyler> get next to jenn, tami
*shygirl* 7 inches...and that's anet.exaggeration for him. Oh, I'm sorry. Really sorry. :D
> Tyler, I want ALL of you, big boy!
<Tyler> tami: and get on your fours
* shygirl gets on all fours
<shygirl> cram it to the hilt
*Catfish* heh
* Tyler pulls out of jenn and fucks tami for a min
* Tyler fingers jenn
*Catfish* of course, we posted this on a mailing list/newsgroup that all the #christian regulars were on at the time :)
*shygirl* only took him a minute. :) Must be an aggie. :D
<shygirl> ooooooh
* honeypot sits back on the pillows and enjoys the scene...
> ooooo, Tyler!
* Tyler pulls out of tami and goes back to jenn
*shygirl* I'll bet he boasts he got two women to his fellow CHem E majors. :D
-> *Catfish* AHAHAHAHAHAHAAH!  Hilarious.
<shygirl> ooooh yes fuck me till i scream
<shygirl> uer a wild man
<Tyler> I'll give 10 strokes each ok?
<shygirl> oooh i'm wet
*Catfish* Planet Yip was a great list :D
<Tyler> now tami
* honeypot purrs contentedly... gimme some lovin' baby!
<shygirl> ohoho
<Tyler> and now jenn
<shygirl> oh god i'm gonna faint
> ooooo... ah eeeeeee ooooooo
*shygirl* ROTFL
* Tyler is fucking jenn harder now
<Tyler> letting shygirl recover
<shygirl> i'm all juiced up 4 u
<Tyler> cum on my dick jenn
<Tyler> ok..
* honeypot rocks in unison to your thrusts
<Tyler> jenn..get on top of me and ride me
<Tyler> while I eat tami out
> Already there, baby... uh-huh... UH!
<Tyler> sit on my face tami
<shygirl> oooOOOOOH
<Tyler> cum baby!
<shygirl> im cuming cumming
<shygirl> yes
> ooooo.... i can't stop!  I'M COMING!
<shygirl> yes
<shygirl> yes
<Tyler> I wanna taste your cum
> ooooooo, oooooo, uhhhhhhh
<Tyler> oh yeah jenn...cum on my dick
> I am, love, uh-huh.... aaaaahhhhhhhh
<shygirl> tyler fuck my tight little hole one more time with your big dick
* Tyler pulls out of jenn and goes deep into Tami
<Tyler> all the way in with one thrust
<shygirl> OOOOHHHHH
-> *shygirl* Hmmmmm, I feel like saying something totally irrelevant.  "By the way, I'm Amish."
<shygirl> i ache with waves of pleasure
<Tyler> my dick is glistering from your pussy juice
*shygirl* I was thinking the same thing. "BTW, TYler, how do you feel if I brought an octopus into the next act?"
* honeypot snuggles beside Tyler and licks his nipples, nipping playfully at the sensitive skin...
* Tyler swallows every drop of jenn's cum
<shygirl> oooh, icame so hard i almost passed out
<shygirl> u r sooo good!
> Tyler, ooooooooo!
<Tyler> keep fucking me
<shygirl> oh oh
<shygirl> trout
-> *shygirl* This guy will be a U.S. Senator someday.  Mark my words.
<Tyler> I"m ready to cum ladies
<Tyler> now both of you sit close together so that I can shoot both of your faces
<shygirl> tyler, not yet hold it in you big stud i wanna cum one more time
*Catfish* is he as bad as Cast says?
<shygirl> tyler ok
<Tyler> ok..
<shygirl> finger me
<Tyler> tami: then fuckme
-> *Catfish* Worse. :D
> Tyler, I want you.  NOW!
* Tyler push tami down on the bed
* Tyler spreads tami's leg
<shygirl> oh YES
<Tyler> and parts the pussy lips
*Catfish* I told Cast, "Tell him you have a club foot" from the Ben log ;)
<Tyler> and slides deep inside of her
* honeypot plays with herself impatietly
<Tyler> jenn: I'll get back to ya..
*shygirl* I can't take this. I'm almost crying here. If Rachael walks in, I'm dead..ahhahahahahaha
<shygirl> ohhhhhhhhhhhhh
-> *Catfish* Oh man, I nearly choked when I read that.  bwahahahahahaha
* Tyler rapidly pumps in and out of tami
<shygirl> i just came all over your duffel bag jenn im sorry
<Tyler> now jenn?
> shygirl, that's okay.  it's not the first time. *giggle*
<Tyler> wanna fuck me again?
> NOW, TYLER!
<Tyler> my dick is still rock hard
* shygirl shygirl feels so faint tyler is such a man
<shygirl> honey, blush
> Tyler, i want you inside me.  Now!
* Tyler slides in jenn's tight cunt
> Pleeeeeeassssseeeee!
<shygirl> i want him to cum on my face like all studs do
> oooooo, yes, fuck me!  fuck me HARDER!
<Tyler> yess
<Tyler> harder
<Tyler> and faster
> HARDER! ooooooooooo
> deeper, baby, DEEPER!  ooooooo, you're so GOOD!
<Tyler> my baals slpapping against your ass cheek
> uh-huh!  ooooooooooo, baby!
<shygirl> jenn you are so lucky
> FASTER!
<Tyler> cum for me babe
> Oh Gog i'm so wet!
* Tyler slams in as fast as he can
> ung!  uh-huh... aaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhh!
<Tyler> yes...
> I'm almost there, baby....  almost there!
* Tyler pumps even faster
-> *shygirl* Good think I'm not drinking milk.  It would be passing through my nose right about now.
> YES!  YEEEEEEEESSSSSS!
<Tyler> cum Jenn!
> OH GOD I'M COMING!!!!!!!
<Tyler> oh yeah...
*shygirl* I'm laughing so hard I'm crying. :D
* Tyler pulls out and aims his cock toward tami's face
<shygirl> oh pleas fuck me tyler
<shygirl> oh TES
> ung... oooooo..... I think I'm gonna faint....
<shygirl> squirt your ht jizz on my face]
<Tyler> I"m gonna cum...
<shygirl> oh yes
> I want some too!
<Tyler> ohhhhhhh
* Tyler turns around and shoots some to jenn
* shygirl shygirl bends down and places her firm red lips, genly moistened by her sensuous tongue, around tylers glans.
-> *Catfish* You're going to scream.  I mean it.  BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
<Tyler> oh shit...I shot everywhere...
<shygirl> oh yes!
<Tyler> how many times did u girls cum?
*Catfish* Geez, is he that bad/good? :)
<shygirl> i came 4 times!
<Tyler> oh..my system shuts down in 2 min
* honeypot cleans up your hot cum with his fingers and licks them, mmmmmmmmm
<Tyler> and u, Jenn?
-> *shygirl* should we reveal ourselves?
<shygirl> tyler you are quite a man!
<Tyler> tami: thanks
> Tyler, I love to lick your hot fingersmmmmmm
*shygirl* Hm, I dunno. I'm posting this to alt.irc. :D
*shygirl* I think it'd be hilarious to have his irc.buddies tell him.
<Tyler> gotta go ladies....
<Tyler> nice fucking with ya
> Goodbye, Love.  Thank you.
<shygirl> bye you big studmuffin! have an elf!
<Tyler> maybe we'll do it again
*Catfish* Cast isn't sure how to save the log to disk.
<shygirl> *koff*
*** Signoff: Tyler (*KISS* *KISS*)
<shygirl> BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
> bwahahahahahahahah!
<shygirl> OH man. Oh man.
<shygirl> What a FUCKING loser!
*** shygirl is [e-mail] (Tami K. Derrick)
*** on channels: #Tyler
*** on irc via server irc.iastate.edu (Iowa State Alternate Reality Server)
<shygirl> Oh shit. Just a sec.
<shygirl> The neighbors think I've lost it. :D
> hahahahahahhaa
> Well, I think we can head off now. ;)
<shygirl> Oh God. SOmeone shoot me before I lose it
> hahahahahahahah

Yep. This is what all you netsexing studmuffins out there look like. Think
you've been getting appreciative women all this time? Not a chance. You
CAN'T get laid, only ridiculed. Give up, before we are forced to incur yet
more amusement at your expense. :D

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