The Hacker's Encyclopedia 1998/hackers_encyclopedia.iso/zines/a_m/ati81.txt

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81

This one goes out to the Beastie Boyz.
Tibet, J&J's reach toothbrush and Pfizer's Tysene
Gets the red out of your nose.

You notice if you move the letters around in true "Spy Magazine" style
from Reach brand toothbrushes you get peach and then cheap???

Welcome to ATI issue 81. It's Wednesday, June 11 and I'm prime anarchist.
This was s'pos'ta come out last sunday nite but I was delayed, busy, lazy,
pick an excuse. The dog ate my homework. Wait, I don't have a dog. OK. It
was that durned 4 foot parasite in my middle intestine. She ate my
wordprocessor. Or was that food processor? Yeah, La Machine.

OK let's start with some national news and then the nowfamous #'s run. Then
on to other fun. Shall we? Let's.
   April 28th seventeen people including six catholic nuns dug a mass grave
in the Pentagon's parade grounds. They were small part of a huge gathering
(more than 250 is huge I'd say. Of course officials have a formula for
formulating a 'ficial formulation. Something like multiply by 2, divide by
3. Throw your hankerchief up in the air; step on it and say "less than.")
Legislation proposing shutdown of SOA (called school of the assassins by
many) will reach senate and house again this year. Someday soon we may see
the shutdown. Hmmm.

PAWN (highpoint, NC.) - June 3. Two Earthculture activists staged a sit-in
at Universal Furniture, a user of illegal rainforest mahogany. The users
agreed to meet with activists and hear their demands within two weeks. A
50 foot banner that 24 others dropped over I-85 saying "save the amazon,
don't buy mahogany" made ABC, NBC & CBS, one radio station and one
daily paper. You might wonder out loud why YOUR locals didn't care, wherever
you reside. Prime suggests you get the word "CITES" in your head early.
  The phrase these people like best is "Stop the Tropical Chop!" and
Pr'Ime equally fond of it.

PAP #'s run. Brought to you by Prime Anarchist Productions in Conjunction
Junction with the electric company, Philharmonic Morris, and the #23.
http://www.execpc.com/~tran/crossroads/MHF
http://www.adbusters.org
http://www.libertynet.org/~kwru
http://www.jeffersonreport.com
http://www.interactive.net/~bridget
http://www.scn.org/news/newspeak
http://www.derechos.org/SOAW

Letters to the editors: (yeah, all five of us...)
Prime --->
Mount Hood has but a mere three years before complete annihilation... it
comes as no surprise that *now* the state wants to charge... to use the
beautiful wilderness which neither the government nor the citizens own.
All... gone... in an erupting cloud of dust and dollar bills.
 -JR-

Marco,
You Suck.
A secret admirer. (Bob loves you)

To The Editor:
Good Job, great pub. Sometimes makes me wonder what on earth your talking
about, other times actually makes me think and/or smile.  I like the poems.
Here's something I wrote a couple days after our campus was hit with a storm
and the power was out for three days!  What fun.  This time the students and
profs were "in the dark" in more than one way.
-Aaron-
ps: It's a submission if you want it to be one.

They call them tornados

Powerful gusts blow. The heavens change colour and are clouded over.
Loud sirens sound.  Citizens (or are they sheep?) run for cover,
hide far below the ground.  Certainly one tries to stay away from
windows. The electricity is cut for all of the non-emergency
uses that just happen to be those of the residential populous.
Radio stations go off the air or are taken over by emergency
transmissions. Phones no longer work.  Food starts to
spoil. Everywhere is dark, with the exception of brief flashes.
Obviously, your internet connection will not be working.

So you walk around in the dark trying to find your flashlight,
light a couple candles, and maybe make a fire if it is cold.
What kind of position are you in to do much of anything?
Especially imagine if it were winter.

Trailor parks seem to always be hit.  Homes of the rich, or those
of the poor.  Hmm.
People die, property is destroyed, cities are transformed into war zones.

                        *               *               *

Mostly I believe that it cannot and will not ever, ever, happen here.
I cannot imagine how people would act so ignorantly, and follow orders
that are clearly injust.  While not always good, I do not believe our
leaders to be capable of such evil intentions.

But today, in the wake of last night's terrible storm, I question
I question whether or not a parental like concern for safety will
eventually always overide the urge to scream and run through the rain.
I wonder whether danger will always cause us to run and hide in the
basement? I wonder whether this will be abused, misused, in times unlike
tornado watches when our safety is not threatened.  I wonder if we will
still cower?. I wonder if we will always follow the orders of our parents,
our teachers, our bosses, our college, our government?  Despite our heart.

So I ask you.  Have you ever seen a tornado?

I have not.  Though I'm told they exist (and do believe it to be so).

And what if another kind of tornado came, one that threatened the lives
and liberties of the heart and souls of the people of this land.
What if a siren went off, or the government told everyone to stay
 home for the drill and power was accidently (of course) cut-off
and we were left powerless due to our reliance on technology to do anything and
everything.

Sure it may not seem likely.  But who said political change was predictable
(likely Marx, but he wasn't right on that among other things). And so long as
there's that minimal chance, it's worth watching for, just like we watch
and are ready for tornados. We also need to heed the warnings of tornado
watchers, those who tell us about the war on the poor, welfare cuts,
surging corporate profits, the desecration of our planet, the corruption
of politics and media in the hands of the elite.  Together we need to watch.

When it comes, rather than hiding as we like to do during tornados, we'll
have to get out and about and fight the darn thing.  And fighting it
(if it comes) means you'll be targetted by lightning, unfortunately
have to step on a couple worms, and get totally soaked.

But hey, like running in a downpour (especially fun with no light other
than the moon and periodic lightning flashes), it will be the darndest
most freeing liberating experience of your life.

So watch.  For the windy tornados that draw sirens, and for the ones that
are harder to see.  Because they won't be announced on TV, you'll be caught
up and not feel the rise of the winds, unless you know.  That it has happened
before, and can happen again.  Here.

-Aaron-
(ed. note. Hey Aaron, can I suggest you may be the next Thomas Paine???)

July 1, "Government" will give Clinton his report card for his work with, in
and over NAFTA.
   ATI gives him an early F. Simply because the North American Foolish
Trade Leveraged-Buyout just plain stinks.
   Plus, Principal Prime Anarchist has formally expelled him for his
extracurricular GATT stuff.
   Should master Clinton say a word about flag burning before the school year
ends he will not be allowed back.
This punishment brought to you by NEWGNAT, the North East Wisconsin chapter
of Grassroots Network Against Trade Agreements.

YANIN. A poem by marco capelli
(because poetry serves the best form of anarchism!!!)

So sorry, I spilled
Sesame seeds on your
Conveyor belt.

You gave me a hard
Time - thanks.

You made my day,

I'll never forget:
Forgiving me
For giving me a
Hard time -- your sense of
Humor.

All the sesames in your tray.
Your smiles, your eyes, your hair.

Yanin, I'm so glad you checked me out.

+ = = +          + = = +

ATI WIRE REPORTS GALORE. June 8-10, 1997.

Jump over Duck Creek, stay on the main road. Pass Cty's U and J
pass Jo's Trading Post, pass the buffalo farm and meat store. Take
any right after Ben Franklins.
   ATI has relocated its offices to Seymour, WI. Home of the hamburger.
OK definitely home to hamburger hall of fame. Here's how it happened if you
ask a local.
   "We got us a one a them New York lawyers," said Chuck Flank, a Seymour
resident and frequent visitor of the "hhof" right here on Main St. USA.
   "And we sued the pants off a those White Castle imposters." I followed
up and found out it was Madison, WI attorneys, but that they did in fact
sue the pants off of White Castle founder Phil A. Hockers.
   Hockers now has a panhandlers licence and he takes donations there on
Columbus Ave. He's the one wearing the barrel instead of pants. OK. the 3rd
one on the east side of the street. Anyhow, according to Chuck Flank and
many other local seymourians, you can get the best and undisputedly biggest
hamburger here in Hamburger Heaven this first weekend in August coming up.
   This is an ATI combined wire report and I was prime anarchist reporting
live (or at least awake) from anywhere wisconsin.

ATI -- your ascii answer to I-Way overload.
Too much graphic got you going gaga? Get the red out Activist Tysine, Inc.

PAWN NATIONAL AFFAIR DESK. Stockton Hildegad Thompson; special to ATI.
Prime Anarchist might be featured on CNN this Saturday or next, the hour
before Larry King. Topic of the feature is something about unusual
businesses, according to Anarchist. And something to do with Gannett's war
on small daily and weekly newspapers.
   Surprisingly, Anarchist does not discuss hacking directly at all during
the half hour interview, which more than likely will be cut down to a 30 sec.
sound nibble or so. Anarchist discussed a little about anarchy direct and
right on; and a LOT about politics. Mostly addressed was journalistic
ethics, libel laws, and generally how sleazy the whole Gannett empire is.
   "Satan's pink-headed step-child," Anarchist bordering himself on libel.
"Especially that Rosylyn Carter chick. They think they can just walk all
over the little guy whenever they want to. And that's about as unamerican
as debit and credit plastic."
   Another quote not expected to make the CNN soundbite was when he suggested
a Trilateralist NWO Bavarian Illuminati Rockefellor, Kennedy, Hitler, Bush,
Gorbachev, conspiracy hidden in the very name of Gannett.
   "You notice if you take just the first and last two letters you get GATT?"

MARCO'S GUIDE TO THE UNABOMBER WILL CONCLUDE IN 82 INSTEAD OF HERE DUE TO
space limitations.

FLASH - PRIME ANARCHIST RECEIVES YET ANOTHER RECRUITMENT LETTER FROM THE CIA.
        Let me say without equivicals, "I turned them down once again!"
Is this some kind of prank? The last time these ignorami bothered me was
upon leaving signal corps branch of the army, on or about 1988. Medically
discharged I was. Honorable, but unable to run more than 3 miles a day. Oh
wait, after that was the time they bothered me when I was living on the
Hopi reservation. Have there been that many times? Feck. <spits on the
groung like a navajo lady>
        Aside from how offensive the thing was (cia letter) ah, are you guys
tormenting me for my small part trying to help shut down School Of the
Americas???
        I'll end this by quoting the end of their heinous, albeit slick
letter:
        "If we've piqued your interest, send your resume and college
transcript to CIA recruitment
PO Box 12727
Arlington, VA 22209-7873
You must successfully complete a thorough medical and psychiatric exam, a
polygraph interview and an extensive background investigation. US citizenship
is required. The CIA is an equal opportunity employer."
        Yeah. So is Jerry Falwell. And so with Mussolini. I try not to
use this word very often anymore, but you guys are fucking twisted.
        To quote my good friend Cygnus, I've got just two words for you:

"You suck."



2 X'S: A NURSERY RHYME   by Marc Frucht
               dedication: Exxon's endeavors at Crandon Minesite

3 wolves snuck into a cranberry bog
And all they took was one.
One bushel of cranberries.

3 wolves snuck into a cranberry bog
And all they took was 2;
2 inches of top soy oil
And 2 bushels of cranberries.

(ch) Yo ho ho and a whad'ya know
We're fillin' up our den
Our den o' thieves with cranberries.
With a heave and a ho
And a shovel you know
We're fillin' up our den
Our den of thieves w/ cranberries.

3 wolves snuck into a cranberry bog
And all they took was 3:
3 layers of rock, 3 inches of soil
3 bushels of cranberries;
And 3 bushels of cranberries.
(ch)

3 wolves snuck into a cranberry bog
And all they took was 4;
4 feet of silt -- 4 layers of rock
4 inches of top soy oil,
And 4 bushels of cranberries.

3 wolves snuck into a cranberry bog
And all they took was 5:
5 hundred years of history.
5 feet of silt, 5 layers of rock,
5 inches of top soy oil,
5 bushels of cranberries,
And 5 bushels of cranberries.
(ch)

3 wolves raped a cranberry bog
And all they took was one:
One of each and everything,
And all that's left is a big old pit,
And a rocky old dust that smells of it.
And a bunch of old folks who cough when they spit,
Where the heavy spent fuel may just about fit;
And one bushel of cranberries:
(spoken: That no one could ever eat.)
And one bushel of cranberries.

We end this issue with JOURNAL POEM 11 from the book "I Slurp My Coffee."
"Crash," wakes the soldier
Rushing outside with nothing
On but dogtags & cockleburrs.
Space shuttle goes up like a
Sashweight; down like a
Smashing window.

She puts on clothes and
Consequently consumes cocoa
Crispies and canned apple
Sauce for Breakfast.
Same day, J's restaurant:
Breakfast all day.
The lard patty in toast
With an egg on it; she
Porks it down faster
Than you can say
Cholesterol.

2 nights jail for jaywalking
That's for Miss Demeanor
Fellow neonious jaywalking
Carries the maximinium of
Death.

This has been ATI 81. Your connection to YuHuVoH. Or was that YaHaVoH?
address all corny quotations, both bartlett and mcintosh to
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