The Hacker's Encyclopedia 1998

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3/Sept/88 That's right! HEYHEYHEYHEYHEYHEYHEYHEYHEYHEYHEY HEYHEYhey, hey, hey, it's ATI!HEY HEYHEYHEYHEYHEYHEYHEYHEYHEYHEYHEY 3/Sept/88 That's right!!! September's issue is already out. And it looks like we're gonna be coming out every two weeks. Yup. We're pumpin em out like seawolfs. At any rate, you caught the special mid-august issue, entitled "specati.doc" right? That one is dedicated to government subcontractors. If you dont have it already, get it. Potent stuff. ADD ADD ADD ADD ADD ADD ADD ADD ADD ADD ADD ADD ADD ADD ADD ADD ADD ADD an addition ADD ADD!! ADD ADD ADD ADD ADD ADD ADD ADD ADD ADD ADD ADD ADD ADD ADD We have an addition to our staff. EE - The Minuteman'll be checkin in now and then. He's a contributing editor. Congratulations, E; you've ***hold on, gotta hit EB*** Something came over on the scanner. Wow, dont have to go anywhere. They pulled the guy over right in front of my next door neighbor. Apparently the guy beat up a striker. What's a "44"? He gave the address too. He doesnt mean a backup, does he? They already have two cruisers out. Hmm... Maybe he means a tow truck. The registration is apparently invalid. Yupper, I guess it's a tow truck. Hmmm. The car hit a picketer at Electric Boat. Hmmm. Apparently the guy wasnt hurt. They knocked over his sign; that's about it. Officer's talkin about bringin two of them to jail. They told 4 kids to beat it, and called for a towtruck. "How're we s'posed to get to New London?" "Not our responsibility," says the officer. "Fuck." They leave up the hill. The backup left, but now another cruiser shows up. Maybe they DID mean reinforcements instead of a towtruck. At any rate, I'm just ramblin. This seems like it'll make good copy. If I hear any more on the scanner, or out my window, I'll holler. .................................. .backtothesubjectbacktothesubject..tcejbusehtotkcabtcejbusehtotkcab. .backtothesubjectbacktothesubject. .tcejbusehtotkcabtcejbusehtotkcab. .................................. So anyways, (where was I) hmmm... EE is the new guy on the block. He writes pretty good, so treat him right, ok? We got a really cool issue here. Have fun, and until next time, "oye como va" -carlos devadip santana --tranaslation??? "you gotta hear how it goes". Boy isnt English concise??? ------------------------- :And now: a word from... : : the commissioner elect : : finally, a dude we can : : all trust!!! : ------------------------- Welcome to the world of licence supension. That's what the letter that Department of Motor Vehicles sent me said. At the end of the letter there was a number to call if I needed any info. Well, I called the number and got a recording that said the number was disconected. I called the local DMV to get better info-- they told me to call the same disconnected number as was on the letter. Well after the run around, I decided to go to Whethersfield (about 1 1/2 hour drive) for info. Once at Whethersfield, I went to the info desk to ask some questions. The lady there said that she could not give me that info because I didn't need to know it. I asked another lady there the same question and she said that she didn't know and that i should call the info number and guess what??? You got it-- it was the same one as on the letter. So back to square 1. I am planing to run for the job of commissioner of moter vehicles. I've had so many tickets that i can answer any questions someone might have and I won't have to shrug my shoulders and say call the number on the letter. Oh, and the question i asked at DMV in weathersfield??? "Who do i talk to about getting my licence back?" Fah-Q (the soon-to-be commisioner of motor vehicles) Fah-Q is assistant editor, co-publisher, and resident chief of electronics. He is also sysop of Den Of Eniquity Bbs. He sits on the Board of Directors of the following corporations: NOPE, PAP, and PWP- the Pervert Watch Patrol, a newly founded group to stop dirty old men from doing stupid things that make America in general look bad. ************************ * * * FOREIGNER ABROAD? * * * ************************ by EE -- The Minuteman Well, here's the situation: My uncle has 3 children (all born in the United States) and a wife (born in the same southern Asian country that he was born in). He came here to study and study he did. He finally lands a half-way decent job in his field of study. Having headed from home some 10,000 miles away he flies back, leaving his wife and children behind here. He resolves the family problems there and decided to fly back to the United States. STOP. The US government embassy tells him that he can not fly back until they validate his VISA. He shows them his VALID VISA and for further support tells them that his three children are US citizens. The embassy says it will take a few weeks to a month for them to validate his VISA and his children. In the mean time he loses his new job because of his forced stay. They later validate his VISA and children and allow his passage to the United States. COMMENTARY: Essentially the government did not believe his VISA as being a valid VISA. This does not enrage me as much as not believing that his children are indeed his. From what my grandfather said: he, my uncle, did absolutely nothing to provoke this action...he was calm and peaceful. When he contacted his employer there was nothing he could do. I am not trying to condemn the U.S. in this respect, but I am simply trying to say that this certain type of red tape we can all do without. (PRIME NOTE: Wow, Minuteman. That's a drag. And for you, that one really hits home, know? Hmm. I did a little lookin into this, and only found this: According to Sam Gejdenson, Connecticut Congressman, our border people had gotten really feisty since Iran gave us problems a couple years ago. I know One thing: There's a group monitoring government's compliance to a new law that makes it impossible to deny a visa due to race, creed, or political views. Anyone who's feelin harassed can call Susan Benda at 202-544-1681 or Gail Pendleton 617-227-9727. --- --- --- --- --- --- PAP's Top-10 Research topics for your term paper, thesis, or phd. 1) Behn's Responsibilities to ITT 2) ITT's Responsibilities in WWII. 3) Just how Important/powerful is the Attorney General??? 4) Avis-Rent-A-Car's Relationship with ITT. 5) ABC's relationship with ITT 6) ITT handles ticket sales via modem for the US Navy. 7) ITT now owns the second insurance company ever started, Hartford Insurance Group. 8) Does Russia have Phones, and can You call Legally??? Without the Operator being there??? 9) After WWII, ITT had to give $200M worth of telecommunications devices to Russia. 0) Mr. "Schweppervescence" Ogilvie has Interest in ITT? I thought he was Just "Joe Madison Avenue"??? Ogilvie and Mayers supports the War effort??? =========================== = info following brought = = on by a need for more = = real information =) = =========================== On 4 August, 1933, the new chancellor of Germany, Herr Hitler, had for the first time received a delegation of American Businessmen at Berchtesgaden. It consisted of 2 men: Colonel Sosthenes Behn and his representative in Germany, Henry Mann. The meeting was the beginning of a very special relationship between ITT and the Third Reich. One Herr Schroeder and our Sosthenes Behn had been found in 1945 in a prison camp in France, wearing the battle dress of an SS corporal. Both worked for years as highlevel execs at ITT after the war. What lay behind this remarkable transmogrification of Behn the Hitler-supporter into Behn the Allied hero? Part of the story is still buried in secret files; but it's clear that colonel Behn, at some stage of the war, became very close to American intelligence agencies, and that he could perform useful services for them, with his own private information network. While the justice department and the FBI continued to distrust him, military intelligence found him and his telephones indispensible. In Latin America, American agents were placed in the ITT offices of Bolivia, Paraguay, and Argentina, among others; and Behn, on his visits to Europe, could bring back information through Switzerland and Spain about the state of the Axis. Neat, eh? Most of that is from a document I sort of declassified. Er, reclassified for them, would be a better phrase, I guess. ++++++++++++ + Update: + ++++++++++++ conversations with officer Turgeon brought this about the car in question: The person didnt get struck. They hit his picket sign. The same car nearly hit the same picketer the same time last week, according to Turgeon. CASTRO DECLARES WAR ON AMERIKA GROTON (APWN)-- Ron Apiceli, owner of Ron's Guitars, has just done the lowest thing of his career yet. A guy walks into Caruso Music Inc, in New London (Ron's prime competitor) wishing to purchase a PA system. He knows exactly what he wants right down to the name brand because it was something that he came across the river for-- Ron's didnt carry that line. The guy receives a phone call, so Rich Caruso has the fella paged. The guy has a conversation to this effect: "Wharl, goshk Ronnie. I just bought one here. Yeah, used my mastercard n everthin. Hmm... We already wrote up the sales slip. Oh, you have a used one there for less? Hmmm. Well, this one's guaranteed, I guess. Must be worth the difference. By Ron." "Just out of curiosity," asks Eddie, one of the sales guys down at Carusos, "was that Ronnie Apicelli you were talkin to?" "As a matter of fact it was". Can you believe that? Of all the low things Ron has done to me, to you, to most of New London County's bigger musicians; you'd never dream he'd do such a thing, would you? Hmm. Well, after the damage was done from my previous campaign against Ron's Ripoff Realm, I'd decided I would be less agressive with things. Instead of "Hey, go to Caruso's, Ron's an asshole", and "I cant believe you shop there. He's a ripoff," and "Better have eyes in the back of your head", and "dont feed the guitar repairman"; I figured I'd be more subtle and straightforward. "Check out the prices, then be sure to check out Caruso's", "I hear Carusos carries an item like that too", and "here, lemme make a quick phone call for ya; I think I can find you a better price across the river", became fashionable. Well, if Ron Apiceli wants to start playing headgames again, he can. But he better not cross me again. I'm just growlin now. Not plannin anything major. But come over that chainlink electronic fence, and look out. Isnt it interesting this keeps repeating itself each time he moves from one building to another? $$ $$$$$ $$ $$$$ $$$ $$$$$ $$ THE PRICE OF LOOKING IT UP JUST WENT DOWN!!! WEBSTER'S New Universal Unabridged Dictionary. Published at 79.95. Barnes & Noble is making it available at only $19.95!!! Call 1800-228-3535. ................................... .eye i aye .eye i aye .eye i aye!!! ................................... ATI is always looking for contributing editors and advertisers. If you or your organization, group, clan, cartel, or gathering wants to advertise, contact Infomaniack Systems, Incorporated at INFOMANIACK BBS OR DEN OF INEQUITY BBS. If you dont know the #'s you dont need to. Ads in ATI do not cost and we pay $0.00 for each contribution. Free, the way it should be, see? + + + ++++++++++++++ + + + August 15, ATI will be announcing the appearance of Jesus Christ Incarnate. We have met him at Norwich State Hospital. Complete with long hair, full Michalangelo facial features, and everything; this guy looks identical to the catholic church icons across the world throughout history. When we asked him if he was Jesus Chist, he was quoted as saying, "Oh me oh my". And he smiled. We will be touring the states with him making him available to anyone who has seen 2 miracles and is holding on for their 3rd miracle allowing them sainthood. There will be a nominal fee to defray the cost of pulling this off. We plan on making this a fullfledged accepted religion, and will gladly take donations so we can set up pews, and get ahold of some offering plates, and all the necessary ointments, and incenses, and satellite dishes so as to compete head to head with the other televangelists. (We'll be more than happy to make appearances on your show, if you help us timeshare airtime on major networks. These things get costly you know. Hell, put us on CBN. ) Heck, we'll even start a 650 club. Just falling short of Pattie's 700 club. Or maybe we'll even call it the 710 club, and hire pat too) In fact, I think Mr. Incarnate will announce his candidacy as president of the US on the Legitimate Party. At any rate, we need to check and see how hard it is to attain tax free status, so dont send in donations yet. Now, it appears that the Virgin Mary is claiming she will show a miracle on the same day, (15th). Do not believe this, as Mr. Incarnate told us his mom doesnt speak publicly since Jimmy Swaggart recently used her entire gender in vane. Mr. Incarnate, has announced that he is seeking out a place for his first appearance, but he has his eye on the Bethlehem, Connecticut MacDonalds. He has invited Ronald MacDonald, as well as King Herb of BK to lunch. Other new wave disciples are expected to be recruited this week. Hang out by the fishing boats. Film at 11. ********************************** sTaNcE StAnCe sTaNcE StAnCe sTaNcE ********************************** We saw this letter to the editor in our local newspaper and are appalled that there might be more than a handful of people out in this world that feel that way: In response to the gentleman who wrote saying joggers should be licensed. I couldn't agree more, but he didnt go far enough. In addition, a special state department bureaucracy should be funded to register and licence children who use the roads to go to the candy store and library and for other useless pursuits. We have this to say: Why dont you take it even further, and be more to the point. Declare martial law throughout the US and have a noon to noon curfew. We find it funny that George Orwell has only missed by about 3 and a half years. Well that's it for this month. Hope you liked it. And expect another next month. If this is your first issue, request the 4 others. They're online at Infomaniack and Den of Inequity. Grab em there. Later, this has been a p a p / / / and NOPE production.