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- Inter-Office HeirarchyOffice Heirarchy
- Typed by Bungalow Bill
- Taken from The Phone Book by J. Edward Hyde
-
- One night a few years back, a Phone Company vice-president attempted to
- place a long distance person-to-person call from his home and found out
- just how frustrating dealing with his company can be.
-
- "This is the operator. Anything I can help you with?" Her voice was
- raspy. Apparently she was having a bad night.
- The vice-president and general manager gave her all the necesary
- information she needed to complete his call.
- "Could you give all that to me again, a little bit slower this time?"
- So he did, but the exasperation was plainly evident in his voice.
- "Did you know that you can dial this call yourself?"
- He replied that he did, but that he wanted her to do it for him.
- "Anything you say. But you'd save a lot of money if you dialed it
- yourself."
- He repeated that he wanted her to dial it for him.
- "Some people never learn."
- She probably didn't mean for him to hear her last remark, but he did and
- demanded to know her name. He threatened to have her head on a tray.
- Finally he even told her who she was speaking to. And once again, he
- demanded that she give him her name.
- "Wouldn't you like to know." With that, the line went dead.
-
- It's comforting to know that other people, even phone company
- executives, catch hell every now and then, just like we do. And this
- illustration illuminates one of the evils of the telephone that obscene
- callers have known about for years. The total anonymity of it all. If an
- operator or a service rep or a plant man feels like it, he or she can
- roast you verbally and there's very little you can do about it. True
- enough, such blatant discourtesy is rare, but it does happen, and there
- are ways you can retaliate and get satisfaction.
-
- If an operator is not everything you think she should be, immediatly ask
- to speak to her S.A. The service assistant is a non management person who
- mediates disputes between operators in her group, helps with dialing
- problems, and distributes the "mark sense" tickets, the computer cards
- operators use to keep a record of each long distance call they handle.
- The S.A. has no real authority, but she takes a lot of the load off the
- person who does, the group chief operator. To an operator, the group
- chief is a mother figure, ally, and symbol of the all-powerful company
- all rolled into one. The group chief has the power of life and death in
- her kingdom, and a demand for an audience with her from an unhappy
- customer brings an unruly operator's heart to her throat. You may not get
- the privilage of actually talking to a group chief, that's what the S.A.
- is for, but the mere knowledge that you know that there is such an animal
- can straighten out the most obdurate operator.
-
- Service reps generally don't give the customers a hard time for two very
- good reasons. 1. They have to give you their name before the conversation
- begins, and 2. the call itself is often bugged. Three hundred and
- sixty-four days a year, you will seldom hear a disrespectful word from
- your service rep. But on December 24, the service observers usually go
- home early. It's generally the slowest day of the year, and no holds are
- barred. If you give the service rep a hard time, she's got a whole year's
- worth of frustration to take out on you. If you happen to get a harpy,
- demand to speak to her B.O.S. The Buisness Office Supervisor will
- generally stand behind her "girls," but in unusual cases she can and will
- have the offending service rep tarred and feathered.
-
- The men you most often see are the linemen, the gallant knights of the
- Phone Kingdom. And there's a very good reason for their nobility: they're
- right up there where you can hit them if they give you trouble. Usually
- the only time a lineman will give you trouble is after your dog has
- mangled his leg. If you should have a problem with him, the installation
- foreman is the person to talk to. The installation foreman is what the
- group chief and the B.O.S. are to their respective sets. If you have
- reason to suspect that this person may not be from the Phone Company, ask
- to see his I.D. card. It has his picture on it, his signature, and the
- company logo.
-
- In a summary, it's not what you threaten to do, it's whom you threaten
- to talk to that gives you an edge. The Phone Company has a jargon all
- it's own, and the use of it by a mere mortal suggests that you know the
- ropes.
-
- By the same token, there are times when the phone people really put it
- together and do an outstanding job. At times like that, it never hurts
- to put in a good word for the excellent service rendered. The word will
- get around, and you'll be surprised how well you'll be taken care of in
- the future.
-
- Ok kids, that's all there is. Next time you're trying to social engineer,
- maybe pull a few of these and see who you get in touch with.
-