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- How to steal video movies
- by The Great Crumal
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-
- Anyone who has been to the local video store knows that video movies are too
- expensive for most of us to buy. Sure, the prices have come down but who wants
- to pay fifty bucks to watch a movie? In the past ten years I have observed the
- home-video industry, and have learned many of the ways video movies are stolen.
- Here, for your education are the techniques.
-
- First, the video pirate will choose an easy prey. The easiest around is the
- Wherehouse. They are very crowded and have too little help. This makes
- creating a diversion very simple.
-
- We will first talk about the simplest piracey techniques, then move to the
- most complex. The simplest is to rent the film you want then dub (duplicate)
- the film onto black video tape. This of course requires that you have a second
- VCR. The dub you make will also be of lower quality, but this is the safest.
-
- Another technique is to make a dub and then carefully open both cassettes and
- trade the tapes. The dub will be in the comercial casing and the original will
- be in your casing. (You end up with the better copy.) sometimes you can't do
- this because the video store will put an anti-tamper sticker on the side. (If
- you open the cassette it rips and you're busted.) But the Wherehouse is too
- stupid to do this.
-
- On to the more complex. If you rent a movie at the Wherehouse you can keep
- it. In a month you will get a phone call asking where it is. You should get
- all flustered and tell them that you returned it. They will of course say that
- their computer still shows it out. Now you go down to the store and talk to the
- manager. Get him when he's busy. Tell him that it's not your fault if he's got
- idiots working for him. They must not have checked it in when you returned it.
- He will give in and mark it missing. They will then stop hassling you and you
- won't have to pay for it.
-
- The most difficult and most daring is to go into the store and find a receipt
- that someone has dropped. You look up what movies they checked out and you go
- get them. You also need one of their bags. You put the movies and the blue
- receipt into the bag and walk out. If anyone says anything show them the
- receipt. If you really have balls you get any movie you want and don't care if
- the receipt you have says "in" or "out" just flash the paper on the way out.
-
- Again the key is to do any of these techniques when the store is jammed. Yes,
- there will be few films on the shelves but you will also be lost in the crowd.
- Invisable to the employees.
-
- Another file written while hung over.
-
- Crumal
- (Interdimensionally)
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