home *** CD-ROM | disk | FTP | other *** search
- The following are the "Rare Gems (sm)" selections for May 24 and 25,
- 1992. "Rare Gems" is a service mark (sm) of Rare Breed Noninc. and David
- Alan Wright. Compilation copyright 1992 by same. All Wright's rights
- reserved. These collections may be distributed freely as long as this
- notice is retained. Colors may, in time, fade. --:Dave
-
- ===
-
- When I was a boy of fourteen, my father was so ignorant I could hardly
- stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be twenty-one, I was
- astonished at how much the old man had learned in seven years. --Mark Twain
-
- Men are born with two eyes, but only one tongue, in order that they
- should see twice as much as they say. --Charles Caleb Colton
-
- ===
-
- The Management of Rare Breed Noninc. regrets that the remaining Gems for
- May 1992 have not been presented. The Management does not regret the
- reason, which was a change of address to much better quarters. The
- Management now lives alone and no longer has to worry about disturbing or
- being disturbed by a roommate or a roommate's friends, and can henceforth
- render future Gems in his underwear with impugnity. Or naked, if he wants.
- Therefore, in his new apartment and his underwear, The Management would
- like to present his Gems for the beginning of June. Uh, let me rephrase
- that... --:Dave
-
- ===
-
- People don't remember you for all of the good things you do. They remember
- the time you blew a giant green snot bubble out your nose. --Donna Barr
-
- As Confucius' cook Ted Chow once said, "Wok softly and carry a chop
- stick." --Rich Maynard
-
- Failures are divided into two classes -- those who thought and never did,
- and those who did and never thought. --John Charles Salak
-
- I... I don't worship the sun any more, majesty. Ra dries out the skin.
- --Boopshepsut, "Doonesbury" strip by Garry Trudeau
-
- If your ship hasn't come in, swim out to it. --Unknown
-
- ===
-
- The following are the "Rare Gems (sm)" selections for June 7 to 13,
- 1992. "Rare Gems" is a service mark (sm) of Rare Breed Noninc. and David
- Alan Wright. Compilation copyright 1992 by same. All Wright's rights
- reserved. These collections may be distributed freely as long as this
- notice is retained. Direct from factory. --:Dave
-
- ===
-
- Make yourself an honest man, and then you may be sure there is one less
- rascal in the world. --Thomas Carlyle
-
- An archaeologist is the best husband any woman can have: the older she
- gets, the more interested he is in her. --Agatha Christie
-
- Belief in a cruel God makes a cruel man. --Thomas Paine
-
- A family is a unit composed not only of children but of men, women, an
- occasional animal, and the common cold. --Ogden Nash
-
- Nothing in life is to be feared. It is only to be understood.
- --Marie Curie
-
- If there is a God, atheism must seem to Him as less of an insult than
- religion. --Goncourt
-
- Home is the place where, when you have to go there, they have to take you
- in. --Robert Frost
-
- ===
-
- The following are the "Rare Gems (sm)" selections for June 14 to 20,
- 1992. "Rare Gems" is a service mark (sm) of Rare Breed Noninc. and David
- Alan Wright. Compilation copyright 1992 by same. All Wright's rights
- reserved. These collections may be distributed freely as long as this
- notice is retained. Slippery when wet. --:Dave
-
- ===
-
- spit-toon: the "Daffy and Sylvester" show
- --Wiley's Dictionary, "B.C." strip by Johnny Hart
-
- Okay, now floor it, go as fast as you can and then smash into something.
- --Crash dummy driving instructor,
- "Mother Goose and Grimm" strip by Mike Peters
-
- The average man does not know what to do with this life, yet wants
- another one which will last forever. --Anatole France
-
- Times are so tough, my wife decided we should have a two-income family.
- Now I'm working two jobs.
- --Viking, "Hagar the Horrible" strip by Chris Browne
-
- Immortality is the genius to move others long after you yourself have
- stopped moving. --Frank Rooney
-
- The more we do, the more we can do. --William Hazlitt
-
- To copy others is necessary, but to copy oneself is pathetic.
- --Pablo Picasso
-
- ===
-
- The following are the "Rare Gems (sm)" selections for June 21 to 27,
- 1992. "Rare Gems" is a service mark (sm) of Rare Breed Noninc. and David
- Alan Wright. Compilation copyright 1992 by same. All Wright's rights
- reserved. These collections may be distributed freely as long as this
- notice is retained. Limit one coupon per purchase. --:Dave
-
- ===
-
- We pay for the mistakes of our ancestors, and it seems only fair that
- they should leave us the money to pay with. --Don Marquis
-
- I just can't shake the feeling that I don't really understand language as
- an abstract concept, but I am merely imitating syllables as a trained
- response. --Parrot, "Bizarro" cartoon by Dan Piraro
-
- Hey, Mr. Wilson... Let's go hunt some spotted asparagus beetles. Yummy!
- --Dennis the Mantis, "The Quigmans" cartoon by Buddy Hickerson
-
- Welcome to extremely high impact aerobics. Ready, people? One, two,
- three... LEAP!! --Aerobics instructor on skyscraper, "The Quigmans"
- cartoon by Buddy Hickerson
-
- He that will not reason is a bigot. He that cannot reason is a fool. He
- that dares not reason is a slave. --Branch Rickey
-
- The universe is full of magical things patiently waiting for our wits to
- grow sharper. --Eden Phillpotts
-
- Lots of people know a good thing the minute the other fellow sees it
- first. --Job E. Hedges
-
- ===
-
- The following are the "Rare Gems (sm)" selections for June 28 to July 4,
- 1992. "Rare Gems" is a service mark (sm) of Rare Breed Noninc. and David
- Alan Wright. Compilation copyright 1992 by same. All Wright's rights
- reserved. These collections may be distributed freely as long as this
- notice is retained. Collect a new volume each week. --:Dave
-
- ===
-
- Let us so live that when we come to die even the undertaker will be
- sorry. --Mark Twain
-
- On the ant farm... "Dang... These things are tough to milk."
- --Terry Gallagher cartoon
-
- There are no happy endings. There are no real endings ever -- happy or
- otherwise. We all have our own stories which are just part of the one Story
- that binds both this world and Faerie. Sometimes we step into each other's
- stories -- perhaps for just a few minutes, perhaps for years -- and then we
- step out of them. But all the while, the story just goes on.
- --"Ghosts of Wind and Shadow" by Charles de Lint
-
- A kiss is a lovely trick designed by nature to stop speech when words
- become superfluous. --Ingrid Bergman
-
- The past is a foreign country; they do things differently there.
- --L.P. Hartley
-
- Rather suffer an injustice than commit one. --Unknown
-
- You cannot do a kindness too soon, for you never know how soon it will be
- too late. --Ralph Waldo Emerson
-