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varitale.arj
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QUIPS.TXT
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1987-06-03
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49 lines
47
A fool and his money are soon befriended.
Dieting is a time of waist.
Deafness is a state of mime.
Any milk can be made into cheese. Here, have some gerbil cheese.
To be or not to be. Ever think about that?
The moving hand writes, and having written, smears the ink.
Topic of the day: Death, are you for it or against it?
Topic of the day: Name alternatives to eternal nothingness. Explain.
I'm not lost. I don't even know where I'm going.
The best defense is a good offense. Cringing is right out.
Let's get crazy and split some infinitives.
Never attribute to malice that which can be explained by stupidity.
Mariners' wives' shower-privilege rule: I before 'e except after sea.
Learn a bit of Latin! It's a great way to make nonsense sound profound!
Topic of the day: Study the linguistic impact of pigs having wings.
Roses are red, violets are blue. Don't these dumb poems aggravate you?
Roses are red, violets are blue. Dum dee dee dum, scooby-dooby doo.
Your idea is flummery, lies and fakery. It's unfinished! Pure half-bakery.
Do unto others. Often.
Do unto others as you'd have them do unto you. Unless you're BIG.
'If it ain't fixed, don't broke it' -- words of an inside trader.
When in trouble, when in doubt, run in circles, scream and shout.
Life is two chests locked for eternity; each one holding the other one's key.
'Roses are red, violets smell nice' -- a poet who has missed the point.
Whistle a happy tune! If you don't know one, a semi-morose one will do.
Here I sit, broken-hearted. Can't think of a theme for this poem I started.
Topic of the day: Life is beautiful if you're very, very happy. Refute.
'Martyrdom is the only way a person can become famous.' -- G.B. Shaw
'College isn't the place to go for ideas.' -- Helen Keller
'A physicist is an atom's way of knowing about atoms.' -- George Wald
'1st rule of intelligent tinkering: save all the parts.' -- Paul Erlich
'A man without religion is like a fish without a bicycle.' -- Vique
Famous graffitti: 'Please don't write on the -- oops!'
Famous graffitti: 'Schroedinger may have been here.'
Famous graffitti: 'I used to be indecisive; now I'm not sure.'
I'd give my right arm to be ambidextrous.
Bureaucrats cut red tape -- lengthwise.
A closed mouth gathers no feet.
There is no substitute for good manners except fast reflexes.
Those who dance are thought mad by those who hear not the music.
Try to be the best of what you are, even if what you are is no good.
If you can't learn to do it well, learn to enjoy doing it badly.
I don't have any solution, but I certainly admire the problem.
You can never get lost, because wherever you go ... there you are!
Time is an illusion perpetrated by the manufacturers of space.
A chicken is an egg's way of reproducing.
Guns don't kill people! BULLETS kill people! Outlaw bullets!