home
***
CD-ROM
|
disk
|
FTP
|
other
***
search
/
Loadstar 237
/
237.d81
/
t.helpdest
< prev
next >
Wrap
Text File
|
2022-08-26
|
3KB
|
172 lines
u
H E L P D E S K
from the Web
Maybe this is the reason tech
support is being outsourced overseas:
Helpdesk: What kind of computer do
you have?
Customer: A white one...
*****
Customer: Hi, this is Rose. I can't
get my diskette out.
Helpdesk: Have you tried pushing the
button?
Customer: Yes, sure, it's really
stuck.
Helpdesk: That doesn't sound good;
I'll make a note..."
Customer: No ... wait a minute... I
hadn't inserted it yet ... it's
still on my desk ... Sorry ....
******
Helpdesk: Click on the 'My Computer'
icon on to the left of the screen.
Customer: Your left or my left?
******
Helpdesk: Good day. How may I help
you?
Male customer: Hello ... I can't
print.
Helpdesk: Would you click on start
for me and...
Customer: Listen pal; don't start
getting technical on me! I'm not
Bill Gates, damn it!
******
Customer: Hi, good afternoon, this is
Martha, I can't print. Every time
I try, it says 'Can't find
printer'. I've even lifted the
printer and placed it in front of
the monitor, but the computer
still says it can't find it ....
******
Customer: I have problems printing in
red...
Helpdesk: Do you have a color printer?
Customer: Aaaah ... Thank you.
******
Helpdesk: What's on your monitor now
ma'am?
Customer: A teddy bear my boyfriend
bought for me in the supermarket.
******
Customer: My keyboard is not working
anymore.
Helpdesk: Are you sure it's plugged
into the computer?
Customer: No. I can't get behind the
computer.
Helpdesk: Pick up your keyboard and
walk 10 paces back.
Customer: Okay.
Helpdesk: Did the keyboard come with
you?
Customer: Yes.
Helpdesk: That means the keyboard is
not plugged in. Is there another
keyboard?
Customer: Yes, there's another one
here. Ah ... that one does work!
******
Helpdesk: Your password is the small
letter a as in apple, a capital
letter V as in Victor, and the
number 7.
Customer: Is that 7 in capital
letters?
******
A customer couldn't get on the
Internet:
Helpdesk: Are you sure you used the
right password?
Customer: Yes I'm sure. I saw my
colleague do it.
Helpdesk: Can you tell me what the
password was?
Customer: Five stars.
[*****]
Helpdesk: What anti-virus program do
you use?
Customer: Netscape.
Helpdesk: That's not an anti-virus
program.
Customer: Oh, sorry... Internet
Explorer.
******
Customer: I have a huge problem. A
friend has put a screensaver on my
computer, but every time I move
the mouse, it disappears!
******
Helpdesk: How may I help you?
Customer: I'm writing my first
e-mail.
Helpdesk: OK, and, what seems to be
the problem?
Customer: Well, I have the letter 'a'
in the address, but how do I get
the circle around it?
******