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- | | c o m m u n i c a t i o n s | |
- | |________________________________________________________________| |
- |____________________________________________________________________|
-
- ...presents... Mourning in America
- by Steve Ross
-
- >>> a cDc publication.......1990 <<<
- -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc-
- _______________________________________________________________________________
-
-
- On January 10, 1986, Queens Borough President Donald Manes was found in a
- car parked in a vacant lot, his ankles slashed by a knife. Observers generally
- considered his actions an attempt at suicide. Then on March 13, Donald Manes,
- indicted for bribery, pushed a 13-inch butcher's knife through his heart. That
- knife sliced public opinion into two factions: those who felt this was just a
- "copy-cat" suicide, since the second incident followed the first so closely,
- and those who viewed it as a separate incident, perhaps the beginning of an
- epidemic.
-
- "C'mon, if it wasn't a copy-cat then why'd he use a knife again?" said
- former Bronx Democratic Leader Stanley Friedman.
-
- "Existing statues imply that a copy-cat, to be recognized as such, must be
- copying the actions of another person," said U.S. Attorney Rudolph Giuliani.
- "We see no precedent for this."
-
- Then on January 22, 1987 R. Budd Dwyer, the State Treasurer of
- Pennsylvania who'd been convicted of bribery weeks earlier, put a .357 Magnum
- in his mouth and, as before television and newspaper cameras, pulled the
- trigger. Many of the copy-cat ideologies felt vindicated. "Manes used a knife
- -- an implement of eating," said Stanley Simon, Bronx Borough President.
- "Dwyer merely picked up the metaphor and added his own personal touch." But
- most observers agreed that Dwyer's suicide marked a definite epidemic -- a
- viewpoint confirmed two weeks later when Robert "Bud" McFarlane attempted
- suicide with a handful of Valium.
-
- The occurrence of politician suicides has tripled in the past five years
- and now ranks as one of the primary causes of death among politicians. In
- fact, the reported rate of suicide may actually be less than the true figure,
- since citizens have grown increasingly unconcerned and may not be reporting the
- deaths of their representatives.
-
- In order to stem the outbreak of politician suicides, psychologists have
- attempted to identify its leading causes. Some studies pinpoint insincerity,
- characterized by "effervescent" smiles and back-slapping, as a potentially
- dangerous behavior problem. Other studies show that a long-standing history of
- conflict between the politician and his or her constituents may be a possible
- factor. All studies indicate that politicians called "Bud" are in the greatest
- danger. Felony indictments also seem to be related.
-
- Psychologists have developed a set of warning sighs that indicate when a
- politician may warrant concern. These signals include:
-
- --searching rooms for electronic devices upon entering
- --late night telephone calls
- --preferring public pay phones over one's home phone
- --a preoccupation with banks, bankbooks and bank records
- --carrying a passport at all times.
-
- "His concern about the issues just waned and waned," said Wayne Kelly, a
- personal friend of Dwyers who prefers to remain anonymous. "He took to
- drinking -- Shirley Temples, Kool-aid, even Bosco. Then he began picking up
- stray objects and trying to fit them into his mouth. We didn't know why until,
- well, it was too late."
-
- While there are no foolproof methods for eradicating politician suicides,
- concerned professionals have reached a consensus that something should, they
- guess, be done. Bronx Borough President Stanley Simon agrees with the White
- House policy of allowing politicians unrestricted freedom in their political
- activities, theorizing that "politicians, like people, would act with [greater]
- responsibility if only they were given greater responsibility." Simon hopes to
- take his message to the streets, as soon as his indictment for bribery is
- resolved. A group of teenagers in Bergenfield, New Jersey believes that the
- media attention granted to politician suicides creates a "poisonous atmosphere"
- of positive reinforcement; under the name "The Garage Gang" they have launched
- a lobbying campaign to keep the media out of politics. And a support network
- for politicians who have no place else to turn has been established by Friends
- Of Politicians (FOPs). The assistance provided by the FOPs network includes
- 24-hour paper shredding services and a toll-free crisis hotline
- (1-800-POL-DONT).
-
- One method seems to have had the greatest impact in deterring politician
- suicides. The three-point program developed by G. Gordon Liddy in his book
- FEEL NO PAIN, SCUM is based on DETECTION, ATTENTION, and TREATMENT and utilizes
- the following outline:
-
- --Early DETECTION of your representative's emotional vulnerability and
- susceptibility to escapist actions. "The time to look for such signals," Liddy
- writes, "is after the subpoenas have been served but before the verdict is
- returned."
-
- --Devote ATTENTION and time to your representative. Since politicians,
- unlike mobsters, are usually found guilty, the most practical and useful
- attention is spent on guided tours of Club Feds -- penal institutions for
- wealthy white collar criminals. "As a worst case scenario these leave little
- to be desired, offering everything from monogrammed Izod uniforms and haute
- cuisine to tennis courts, polo fields and olympic-size pools."
-
- --If the attention doesn't work then Liddy recommends a stop-gap TREATMENT
- of physical and verbal abuse. Liddy writes: "Lily-livered wimps who think
- there's an easy way out of anything must be shown the error of their ways."
-
- But the only real cure for politician suicides is prevention. As
- President Reagan noted, "I, uh, well, uhm, heh-heh." White House spokesman
- Marlon Fitzwater interpreted this statement as: "If your peers ask you to enter
- politics: say no. If your children are thinking about it: seek counseling for
- them. And if someone you care about is already involved in politics: show them
- you care, but keep it well documented."
-
- _ _ _____________________________________________________________________
- /((___))\|The Dead Zone........214/522-5321 Demon Roach Undrgrnd..806/794-4362
- [ x x ] |NIHILISM.............415/285-9453 The People Farm.......916/673-8412
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- (' ') |Lunatic Labs.........213/655-0691 The Works.............617/861-8976
- (U) |=====================================================================
- .ooM |1990 cDc communications by Steve Ross. 05/17/90-#137
- \_______/|All Rights Pissed Away.
-
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