home *** CD-ROM | disk | FTP | other *** search
Text File | 1997-07-18 | 45.8 KB | 1,739 lines |
- 1 bulls, 3 cows.
- %
- $3,000,000.
- %
- 40 isn't old. If you're a tree.
- %
- A crow perched himself on a telephone wire. He was going to make a
- long-distance caw.
- %
- A furore Normanorum libera nos, O Domine!
- [From the fury of the norsemen deliver us, O Lord!]
- -- Medieval prayer
- %
- A log may float in a river, but that does not make it a crocodile.
- %
- A pickup with three guys in it pulls into the lumber yard. One of the men
- gets out and goes into the office.
- "I need some four-by-two's," he says.
- "You must mean two-by-four's" replies the clerk.
- The man scratches his head. "Wait a minute," he says, "I'll go
- check."
- Back, after an animated conversation with the other occupants of the
- truck, he reassures the clerk, that, yes, in fact, two-by-fours would be
- acceptable.
- "OK," says the clerk, writing it down, "how long you want 'em?"
- The guy gets the blank look again. "Uh... I guess I better go
- check," he says.
- He goes back out to the truck, and there's another animated
- conversation. The guy comes back into the office. "A long time," he says,
- "we're building a house".
- %
- A prediction is worth twenty explanations.
- -- K. Brecher
- %
- A reverend wanted to telephone another reverend. He told the operator,
- "This is a parson to parson call."
- %
- A squeegee by any other name wouldn't sound as funny.
- %
- A vacuum is a hell of a lot better than some of the stuff that nature
- replaces it with.
- -- Tennessee Williams
- %
- A young girl, Carmen Cohen, was called by her last name by her father,
- and her first name by her mother. By the time she was ten, didn't know if she
- was Carmen or Cohen.
- %
- According to my best recollection, I don't remember.
- -- Vincent "Jimmy Blue Eyes" Alo
- %
- Adults die young.
- %
- African violet: Such worth is rare
- Apple blossom: Preference
- Bachelor's button: Celibacy
- Bay leaf: I change but in death
- Camelia: Reflected loveliness
- Chrysanthemum, red: I love
- Chrysanthemum, white: Truth
- Chrysanthemum, other: Slighted love
- Clover: Be mine
- Crocus: Abuse not
- Daffodil: Innocence
- Forget-me-not: True love
- Fuchsia: Fast
- Gardenia: Secret, untold love
- Honeysuckle: Bonds of love
- Ivy: Friendship, fidelity, marriage
- Jasmine: Amiablity, transports of joy, sensuality
- Leaves (dead): Melancholy
- Lilac: Youthful innocence
- Lilly: Purity, sweetness
- Lilly of the valley: Return of happiness
- Magnolia: Dignity, perseverance
- * An upside-down blossom reverses the meaning.
- %
- Age is a tyrant who forbids, at the penalty of life, all the pleasures of youth.
- %
- Agree with them now, it will save so much time.
- %
- Ah, the Tsar's bazaar's bizarre beaux-arts!
- %
- Ahhhhhh... the smell of cuprinol and mahogany. It excites me to...
- acts of passion... acts of... ineptitude.
- %
- All phone calls are obscene.
- -- Karen Elizabeth Gordon
- %
- All the really good ideas I ever had came to me while I was milking a cow.
- -- Grant Wood
- %
- Am I ranting? I hope so. My ranting gets raves.
- %
- AMAZING BUT TRUE ...
- If all the salmon caught in Canada in one year were laid end to end
- across the Sahara Desert, the smell would be absolutely awful.
- %
- AMAZING BUT TRUE ...
- There is so much sand in Northern Africa that if it were spread out it
- would completely cover the Sahara Desert.
- %
- Amnesia used to be my favorite word, but then I forgot it.
- %
- An atom-blaster is a good weapon, but it can point both ways.
- -- Isaac Asimov
- %
- ... and furthermore ... I don't like your trousers.
- %
- And I alone am returned to wag the tail.
- %
- Any stone in your boot always migrates against the pressure gradient to
- exactly the point of most pressure.
- -- Milt Barber
- %
- Any time things appear to be going better, you have overlooked something.
- %
- Are we not men?
- %
- As Zeus said to Narcissus, "Watch yourself."
- %
- Avec!
- %
- BAD CRAZINESS, MAN!!!
- %
- Bare feet magnetize sharp metal objects so they point upward from the
- floor -- especially in the dark.
- %
- Batteries not included.
- %
- BE ALERT!!!! (The world needs more lerts...)
- %
- BE ALOOF! (There has been a recent population explosion of lerts.)
- %
- Before I knew the best part of my life had come, it had gone.
- %
- Being frustrated is disagreeable, but the real disasters in life begin
- when you get what you want.
- %
- Believe everything you hear about the world; nothing is too impossibly bad.
- -- Honor'e de Balzac
- %
- Biggest security gap -- an open mouth.
- %
- Bizarreness is the essence of the exotic.
- %
- Blame Saint Andreas -- it's all his fault.
- %
- Blessed are they who Go Around in Circles, for they Shall be Known as Wheels.
- %
- Blue paint today.
- [Funny to Jack Slingwine, Guy Harris and Hal Pierson. Ed.]
- %
- Boy! Eucalyptus!
- %
- Boy, that crayon sure did hurt!
- %
- Bushydo -- the way of the shrub. Bonsai!
- %
- "But Huey, you PROMISED!"
- "Tell 'em I lied."
- %
- But like the Good Book says... There's BIGGER DEALS to come!
- %
- By perseverance the snail reached the Ark.
- -- Charles Spurgeon
- %
- CF&C stole it, fair and square.
- -- Tim Hahn
- %
- Chapter VIII
-
- Due to the convergence of forces beyond his comprehension, Salvatore
- Quanucci was suddenly squirted out of the universe like a watermelon
- seed, and never heard from again.
- %
- Colorless green ideas sleep furiously.
- %
- Confucius say too much.
- -- Recent Chinese Proverb
- %
- Congratulations are in order for Tom Reid.
-
- He says he just found out he is the winner of the 2021 Psychic of the
- Year award.
- %
- Culture is the habit of being pleased with the best and knowing why.
- %
- Custer committed Siouxicide.
- %
-
- "Whatever the missing mass of the universe is, I hope it's not cockroaches!"
- -- Mom
- %
- Death to all fanatics!
- %
- Depart in pieces, i.e., split.
- %
- Deprive a mirror of its silver and even the Czar won't see his face.
- %
- Did I say 2? I lied.
- %
- Did it ever occur to you that fat chance and slim chance mean the same thing?
-
- Or that we drive on parkways and park on driveways?
- %
- Did you hear about the model who sat on a broken bottle and cut a nice figure?
- %
- Did you know ...
-
- That no-one ever reads these things?
- %
- "Die? I should say not, dear fellow. No Barrymore would allow such a
- conventional thing to happen to him."
- -- John Barrymore's dying words
- %
- Dignity is like a flag. It flaps in a storm.
- -- Roy Mengot
- %
- Dime is money.
- %
- Do not underestimate the power of the Force.
- %
- Do not use that foreign word "ideals". We have that excellent native
- word "lies".
- -- Henrik Ibsen, "The Wild Duck"
- %
- Do people know you have freckles everywhere?
- %
- Do students of Zen Buddhism do Om-work?
- %
- "Do you believe in intuition?"
- "No, but I have a strange feeling that someday I will."
- %
- Do you have lysdexia?
- %
- Do YOU have redeeming social value?
- %
- Does a one-legged duck swim in a circle?
- %
- Don't force it, get a larger hammer.
- -- Anthony
- %
- Don't guess -- check your security regulations.
- %
- Don't I know you?
- %
- Don't let your status become too quo!
- %
- Don't quit now, we might just as well lock the door and throw away the key.
- %
- Don't speak about Time, until you have spoken to him.
- %
- Don't worry -- the brontosaurus is slow, stupid, and placid.
- %
- Don't worry if you're a kleptomaniac; you can always take something for it.
- %
- Double!
- %
- Dr. Jekyll had something to Hyde.
- %
- Dr. Livingston?
- Dr. Livingston I. Presume?
- %
- Drawing on my fine command of language, I said nothing.
- %
- Dreams are free, but there's a small charge for alterations.
- %
- Drop that pickle!
- %
- Drop the vase and it will become a Ming of the past.
- -- The Adventurer
- %
- Duckies are fun!
- %
- Ducks? What ducks??
- %
- Dungeons and Dragons is just a lot of Saxon Violence.
- %
- During a fight, a husband threw a bowl of Jello at his wife. She had
- him arrested for carrying a congealed weapon.
- In another fight, the wife decked him with a heavy glass pitcher.
- She's a women who conks to stupor.
- %
- Dyslexia means never having to say that you're ysror.
- %
- Dyslexics have more fnu.
- %
- DYSLEXICS OF THE WORLD, UNTIE!
- %
- "Earth is a great, big funhouse without the fun."
- -- Jeff Berner
- %
- Editing is a rewording activity.
- %
- Eggheads unite! You have nothing to lose but your yolks.
- -- Adlai Stevenson
- %
- Events are not affected, they develop.
- -- Sri Aurobindo
- %
- Ever wonder why fire engines are red?
-
- Because newspapers are read too.
- Two and Two is four.
- Four and four is eight.
- Eight and four is twelve.
- There are twelve inches in a ruler.
- Queen Mary was a ruler.
- Queen Mary was a ship.
- Ships sail the sea.
- There are fishes in the sea.
- Fishes have fins.
- The Finns fought the Russians.
- Russians are red.
- Fire engines are always rush'n.
- Therefore fire engines are red.
- %
- Every absurdity has a champion who will defend it.
- %
- Every day it's the same thing -- variety. I want something different.
- %
- Every time I think I know where it's at, they move it.
- %
- Every time you manage to close the door on Reality, it comes in through the
- window.
- %
- Every word is like an unnecessary stain on silence and nothingness.
- -- Beckett
- %
- Everything bows to success, even grammar.
- %
- Everything can be filed under "miscellaneous".
- %
- Everything might be different in the present if only one thing had
- been different in the past.
- %
- Everything should be built top-down, except the first time.
- %
- Everything should be built top-down, except this time.
- %
- Everything takes longer, costs more, and is less useful.
- -- Erwin Tomash
- %
- Everything you know is wrong!
- %
- Facts do not cease to exist because they are ignored.
- -- Aldous Huxley
- %
- Facts, apart from their relationships, are like labels on empty bottles.
- -- Sven Italla
- %
- "Fantasies are free."
- "NO!! NO!! It's the thought police!!!!"
- %
- Far duller than a serpent's tooth it is to spend a quiet youth.
- %
- Fats Loves Madelyn.
- %
- Finding out what goes on in the C.I.A. is like performing acupuncture
- on a rock.
- -- New York Times, Jan. 20, 1981
- %
- Five bicycles make a volkswagen, seven make a truck.
- -- Adolfo Guzman
- %
- Flame on!
- -- Johnny Storm
- %
- Fly me away to the bright side of the moon ...
- %
- For a holy stint, a moth of the cloth gave up his woolens for lint.
- %
- For thee the wonder-working earth puts forth sweet flowers.
- -- Titus Lucretius Carus
- %
- Force it!!!
- If it breaks, well, it wasn't working anyway...
- No, don't force it, get a bigger hammer.
- %
- FORCE YOURSELF TO RELAX!
- %
- Forest fires cause Smokey Bears.
- %
- Fortune's graffito of the week (or maybe even month):
-
- Don't Write On Walls!
-
- (and underneath)
-
- You want I should type?
- %
- Fortune's Office Door Sign of the Week:
-
- Incorrigible punster -- Do not incorrige.
- %
- "Found it," the Mouse replied rather crossly: "of course you know
- what 'it' means."
- "I know what 'it' means well enough, when I find a thing," said the
- Duck: "it's generally a frog or a worm. The question is, what did the
- archbishop find?"
- %
- From a certain point onward there is no longer any turning back.
- That is the point that must be reached.
- -- F. Kafka
- %
- Furious activity is no substitute for understanding.
- -- H.H. Williams
- %
- General notions are generally wrong.
- -- Lady M.W. Montagu
- %
- Give me a Plumber's friend the size of the Pittsburgh dome, and a place
- to stand, and I will drain the world.
- %
- GIVE UP!!!!
- %
- Given my druthers, I'd druther not.
- %
- Gloffing is a state of mine.
- %
- Go 'way! You're bothering me!
- %
- Go away, I'm all right.
- -- H.G. Wells' last words.
- %
- Go climb a gravity well!
- %
- Goals... Plans... they're fantasies, they're part of a dream world...
- -- Wally Shawn
- %
- God is Dead.
- -- Nietzsche
- Nietzsche is Dead.
- -- God
- Nietzsche is God.
- -- Dead
- %
- God isn't dead, he just couldn't find a parking place.
- %
- God isn't dead. He just doesn't want to get involved.
- %
- God made the world in six days, and was arrested on the seventh.
- %
- God was satisfied with his own work, and that is fatal.
- -- Samuel Butler
- %
- God, I ask for patience -- and I want it right now!
- %
- Good news is just life's way of keeping you off balance.
- %
- Half Moon tonight. (At least it's better than no Moon at all.)
- %
- Happiness makes up in height what it lacks in length.
- %
- Happy feast of the pig!
- %
- Hard reality has a way of cramping your style.
- -- Daniel Dennett
- %
- Have at you!
- %
- Have the courage to take your own thoughts seriously, for they will shape you.
- -- Albert Einstein
- %
- "Have you lived here all your life?"
- "Oh, twice that long."
- %
- Have you locked your file cabinet?
- %
- Have you noticed that all you need to grow healthy, vigorous grass is a
- crack in your sidewalk?
- %
- "He flung himself on his horse and rode madly off in all directions."
- %
- He who spends a storm beneath a tree, takes life with a grain of TNT.
- %
- Hedonist for hire... no job too easy!
- %
- Help a swallow land at Capistrano.
- %
- Help stamp out and abolish redundancy and repetition.
- %
- HELP! Man trapped in a human body!
- %
- HELP! MY TYPEWRITER IS BROKEN!
- -- E. E. CUMMINGS
- %
- Here there be tygers.
- %
- "His eyes were cold. As cold as the bitter winter snow that was falling
- outside. Yes, cold and therefore difficult to chew..."
- %
- Honk if you hate bumper stickers that say "Honk if ..."
- %
- Honk if you love peace and quiet.
- %
- Housework can kill you if done right.
- -- Erma Bombeck
- %
- How can you be in two places at once when you're not anywhere at all?
- %
- How come only your friends step on your new white sneakers?
- %
- How come we never talk anymore?
- %
- How come wrong numbers are never busy?
- %
- How kind of you to be willing to live someone's life for them.
- %
- How much of their influence on you is a result of your influence on them?
- %
- How untasteful can you get?
- %
- Huh?
- %
- I always wake up at the crack of ice.
- -- Joe E. Lewis
- %
- I am the mother of all things, and all things should wear a sweater.
- %
- I can read your mind, and you should be ashamed of yourself.
- %
- I can relate to that.
- %
- I can resist anything but temptation.
- %
- I couldn't possibly fail to disagree with you less.
- %
- I despise the pleasure of pleasing people whom I despise.
- %
- I don't have any solution but I certainly admire the problem.
- -- Ashleigh Brilliant
- %
- "I don't mind going nowhere as long as it's an interesting path."
- -- Ronald Mabbitt
- %
- I don't understand you anymore.
- %
- I don't wish to appear overly inquisitive, but are you still alive?
- %
- I enjoy the time that we spend together.
- %
- I exist, therefore I am paid.
- %
- I fear explanations explanatory of things explained.
- %
- I feel sorry for your brain... all alone in that great big head...
- %
- "I found out why my car was humming. It had forgotten the words."
- %
- I hate quotations.
- -- Ralph Waldo Emerson
- %
- I hate trolls. Maybe I could metamorph it into something else -- like a
- ravenous, two-headed, fire-breathing dragon.
- -- Willow
- %
- I have a terrible headache, I was putting on toilet water and the lid fell.
- %
- I have become me without my consent.
- %
- I have more hit points that you can possible imagine.
- %
- I have seen the Great Pretender and he is not what he seems.
- %
- I haven't lost my mind; I know exactly where I left it.
- %
- I hear the sound that the machines make, and feel my heart break, just
- for a moment.
- %
- I hear what you're saying but I just don't care.
- %
- I know it all. I just can't remember it all at once.
- %
- I know you think you thought you knew what you thought I said,
- but I'm not sure you understood what you thought I meant.
- %
- I know you're in search of yourself, I just haven't seen you anywhere.
- %
- I live the way I type; fast, with a lot of mistakes.
- %
- I love treason but hate a traitor.
- -- Gaius Julius Caesar
- %
- I never did it that way before.
- %
- "I only touch base with reality on an as-needed basis!"
- -- Royal Floyd Mengot (Klaus)
- %
- [I plan] to see, hear, touch, and destroy everything in my path,
- including beets, rutabagas, and most random vegetables, but excluding yams,
- as I am absolutely terrified of yams...
- Actually, I think my fear of yams began in my early youth, when many
- of my young comrades pelted me with same for singing songs of far-off lands
- and deep blue seas in a language closely resembling that of the common sow.
- My psychosis was further impressed into my soul as I reached adolescence,
- when, while skipping through a field of yams, light-heartedly tossing flowers
- into the stratosphere, a great yam-picking machine tore through the fields,
- pursuing me to the edge of the great plantation, where I escaped by diving
- into a great ditch filled with a mixture of water and pig manure, which may
- explain my tendency to scream, "Here come the Martians! Hide the eggs!" every
- time I have pork. But I digress. The fact remains that I cannot rationally
- deal with yams, and pigs are terrible conversationalists.
- %
- I predict that today will be remembered until tomorrow!
- %
- I refuse to have a battle of wits with an unarmed person.
- %
- I saw what you did and I know who you are.
- %
- I smell a wumpus.
- %
- I thought YOU silenced the guard!
- %
- I understand why you're confused. You're thinking too much.
- -- Carole Wallach.
- %
- I used to be an agnostic, but now I'm not so sure.
- %
- I used to get high on life but lately I've built up a resistance.
- %
- I used to think I was indecisive, but now I'm not so sure.
- %
- I want to reach your mind -- where is it currently located?
- %
- I will always love the false image I had of you.
- %
- I will make you shorter by the head.
- -- Elizabeth I
- %
- I will never lie to you.
- %
- I will not forget you.
- %
- I wouldn't be so paranoid if you weren't all out to get me!!
- %
- I'd be a poorer man if I'd never seen an eagle fly.
- -- John Denver
-
- [I saw an eagle fly once. Fortunately, I had my eagle fly swatter handy. Ed.]
- %
- I'd give my right arm to be ambidextrous.
- %
- "I'm dying," he croaked.
- "My experiment was a success," the chemist retorted .
- "You can't really train a beagle," he dogmatized.
- "That's no beagle, it's a mongrel," she muttered.
- "The fire is going out," he bellowed.
- "Bad marksmanship," the hunter groused.
- "You ought to see a psychiatrist," he reminded me.
- "You snake," she rattled.
- "Someone's at the door," she chimed.
- "Company's coming," she guessed.
- "Dawn came too soon," she mourned.
- "I think I'll end it all," Sue sighed.
- "I ordered chocolate, not vanilla," I screamed.
- "Your embroidery is sloppy," she needled cruelly.
- "Where did you get this meat?" he bridled hoarsely.
- -- Gyles Brandreth, "The Joy of Lex"
- %
- I'm glad I was not born before tea.
- -- Sidney Smith (1771-1845)
- %
- I'm going to raise an issue and stick it in your ear.
- -- John Foreman
- %
- I'm not laughing with you, I'm laughing at you.
- %
- I'm not offering myself as an example; every life evolves by its own laws.
- %
- I'm not prejudiced, I hate everyone equally.
- %
- I'm not proud.
- %
- I'm not tense, just terribly, terribly alert!
- %
- I'm prepared for all emergencies but totally unprepared for everyday life.
- %
- I'm so broke I can't even pay attention.
- %
- I've Been Moved!
- %
- I've been there.
- %
- I've enjoyed just about as much of this as I can stand.
- %
- Identify your visitor.
- %
- Idleness is the holiday of fools.
- %
- "If a camel flies, no one laughs if it doesn't get very far."
- -- Paul White
- %
- If all men were brothers, would you let one marry your sister?
- %
- If everything is coming your way then you're in the wrong lane.
- %
- If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something.
- %
- If God is dead, who will save the Queen?
- %
- If God is One, what is bad?
- -- Charles Manson
- %
- If I could drop dead right now, I'd be the happiest man alive!
- -- Samuel Goldwyn
- %
- If I don't see you in the future, I'll see you in the pasture.
- %
- If I love you, what business is it of yours?
- -- Johann van Goethe
- %
- If it doesn't smell yet, it's pretty fresh.
- -- Dave Johnson, on dead seagulls
- %
- If it pours before seven, it has rained by eleven.
- %
- If it wasn't so warm out today, it would be cooler.
- %
- If it weren't for the last minute, nothing would ever get done.
- %
- If life gives you lemons, make lemonade.
- %
- If life is merely a joke, the question still remains: for whose amusement?
- %
- If life isn't what you wanted, have you asked for anything else?
- %
- If rabbits' feet are so lucky, what happened to the rabbit?
- %
- If the ends don't justify the means, then what does?
- -- Robert Moses
- %
- If the English language made any sense, lackadaisical would have something
- to do with a shortage of flowers.
- -- Doug Larson
-
- [Not to mention, butterfly would be flutterby. Ed.]
- %
- If the future isn't what it used to be, does that mean that the past
- is subject to change in times to come?
- %
- If the grass is greener on other side of fence, consider what may be
- fertilizing it.
- %
- If the meanings of "true" and "false" were switched, then this sentence
- would not be false.
- %
- If the odds are a million to one against something occurring, chances
- are 50-50 it will.
- %
- If there is no God, who pops up the next Kleenex?
- -- Art Hoppe
- %
- If time heals all wounds, how come the belly button stays the same?
- %
- If we see the light at the end of the tunnel, it's the light of an
- oncoming train.
- -- Robert Lowell
- %
- If you are going to walk on thin ice, you may as well dance.
- %
- If you can lead it to water and force it to drink, it isn't a horse.
- %
- If you do not think about the future, you cannot have one.
- -- John Galsworthy
- %
- If you have nothing to do, don't do it here.
- %
- If you knew what to say next, would you say it?
- %
- If you know the answer to a question, don't ask.
- -- Petersen Nesbit
- %
- If you stick your head in the sand, one thing is for sure, you're gonna
- get your rear kicked.
- %
- If you're right 90% of the time, why quibble about the remaining 3%?
- %
- Imagination is the one weapon in the war against reality.
- -- Jules de Gaultier
- %
- Imagine what we can imagine!
- -- Arthur Rubinstein
- %
- Immanuel doesn't pun, he Kant.
- %
- Immanuel Kant but Kubla Khan.
- %
- In case of fire, stand in the hall and shout "Fire!"
- -- The Kidner Report
- %
- In my end is my beginning.
- -- Mary Stuart, Queen of Scots
- %
- In the war of wits, he's unarmed.
- %
- In this world, truth can wait; she's used to it.
- %
- Include me out.
- %
- Indecision is the true basis for flexibility.
- %
- Indifference will certainly be the downfall of mankind, but who cares?
- %
- Insomnia isn't anything to lose sleep over.
- %
- Is death legally binding?
- %
- Isn't air travel wonderful? Breakfast in London, dinner in New York,
- luggage in Brazil.
- %
- It has long been known that birds will occasionally build nests in the
- manes of horses. The only known solution to this problem is to sprinkle
- baker's yeast in the mane, for, as we all know, yeast is yeast and nest
- is nest, and never the mane shall tweet.
- %
- It is a lesson which all history teaches wise men, to put trust in ideas,
- and not in circumstances.
- -- Emerson
- %
- It is better never to have been born. But who among us has such luck?
- One in a million, perhaps.
- %
- It is better to be bow-legged than no-legged.
- %
- It is better to kiss an avocado than to get in a fight with an aardvark.
- %
- It is easier to resist at the beginning than at the end.
- -- Leonardo da Vinci
- %
- It is easier to run down a hill than up one.
- %
- It is the business of the future to be dangerous.
- -- Hawkwind
- %
- It is very difficult to prophesy, especially when it pertains to the future.
- %
- It isn't easy being a Friday kind of person in a Monday kind of world.
- %
- It looks like blind screaming hedonism won out.
- %
- It occurred to me lately that nothing has occurred to me lately.
- %
- "It was a virgin forest, a place where the Hand of Man had never set foot."
- %
- It was one of those perfect summer days -- the sun was shining, a breeze
- was blowing, the birds were singing, and the lawn mower was broken ...
- --- James Dent
- %
- It was pleasant to me to get a letter from you the other day. Perhaps
- I should have found it pleasanter if I had been able to decipher it. I
- don't think that I mastered anything beyond the date (which I knew) and
- the signature (which I guessed at). There's a singular and a perpetual
- charm in a letter of yours; it never grows old, it never loses its
- novelty. Other letters are read and thrown away and forgotten, but
- yours are kept forever -- unread. One of them will last a reasonable
- man a lifetime.
- -- Thomas Aldrich
- %
- It wasn't that she had a rose in her teeth, exactly. It was more like
- the rose and the teeth were in the same glass.
- %
- It would save me a lot of time if you just gave up and went mad now.
- %
- It'll be a nice world if they ever get it finished.
- %
- It's a .88 magnum -- it goes through schools.
- -- Danny Vermin
- %
- It's amazing how much better you feel once you've given up hope.
- %
- It's not the fall that kills you, it's the landing.
- %
- It's pretty hard to tell what does bring happiness; poverty and wealth
- have both failed.
- -- Kim Hubbard
- %
- Joe's sister puts spaghetti in her shoes!
- %
- Join the march to save individuality!
- %
- Just because everything is different doesn't mean anything has changed.
- -- Irene Peter
- %
- Just give Alice some pencils and she will stay busy for hours.
- %
- Kilroe hic erat!
- %
- Kiss me twice. I'm schizophrenic.
- %
- Kissing a fish is like smoking a bicycle.
- %
- Knocked, you weren't in.
- -- Opportunity
- %
- Know what I hate most? Rhetorical questions.
- -- Henry N. Camp
- %
- L'hazard ne favorise que l'esprit prepare.
- -- L. Pasteur
- %
- La-dee-dee, la-dee-dah.
- %
- Lake Erie died for your sins.
- %
- Language is a virus from another planet.
- -- William Burroughs
- %
- Laughing at you is like drop kicking a wounded humming bird.
- %
- Lemmings don't grow older, they just die.
- %
- Let he who takes the plunge remember to return it by Tuesday.
- %
- Let me put it this way: today is going to be a learning experience.
- %
- Let others praise ancient times; I am glad I was born in these.
- -- Ovid (43 B.C. - A.D. 18)
- %
- Let's remind ourselves that last year's fresh idea is today's cliche.
- -- Austen Briggs
- %
- Life -- Love It or Leave It.
- %
- Life being what it is, one dreams of revenge.
- -- Paul Gauguin
- %
- Life is both difficult and time consuming.
- %
- Life is fraught with opportunities to keep your mouth shut.
- %
- Life is just a bowl of cherries, but why do I always get the pits?
- %
- Life is like a simile.
- %
- Life is like an analogy.
- %
- Life is not for everyone.
- %
- Life would be tolerable but for its amusements.
- -- G.B. Shaw
- %
- Like winter snow on summer lawn, time past is time gone.
- %
- Littering is dumb.
- -- Ronald Macdonald
- %
- Live fast, die young, and leave a flat patch of fur on the highway!
- -- The Squirrels' Motto (The "Hell's Angels of Nature")
- %
- Look out! Behind you!
- %
- Look! Before our very eyes, the future is becoming the past.
- %
- Lookie, lookie, here comes cookie...
- -- Stephen Sondheim
- %
- Losing your drivers' license is just God's way of saying "BOOGA, BOOGA!"
- %
- Lost interest? It's so bad I've lost apathy.
- %
- Love the sea? I dote upon it -- from the beach.
- %
- Luck can't last a lifetime, unless you die young.
- -- Russell Banks
- %
- Madness takes its toll.
- %
- Man who falls in blast furnace is certain to feel overwrought.
- %
- Man who falls in vat of molten optical glass makes spectacle of self.
- %
- Man who sleep in beer keg wake up sticky.
- %
- Marigold: Jealousy
- Mint: Virute
- Orange blossom: Your purity equals your loveliness
- Orchid: Beauty, magnificence
- Pansy: Thoughts
- Peach blossom: I am your captive
- Petunia: Your presence soothes me
- Poppy: Sleep
- Rose, any color: Love
- Rose, deep red: Bashful shame
- Rose, single, pink: Simplicity
- Rose, thornless, any: Early attachment
- Rose, white: I am worthy of you
- Rose, yellow: Decrease of love, rise of jealousy
- Rosebud, white: Girlhood, and a heart ignorant of love
- Rosemary: Remembrance
- Sunflower: Haughtiness
- Tulip, red: Declaration of love
- Tulip, yellow: Hopeless love
- Violet, blue: Faithfulness
- Violet, white: Modesty
- Zinnia: Thoughts of absent friends
- * An upside-down blossom reverses the meaning.
- %
- May a hundred thousand midgets invade your home singing cheesy lounge-lizard
- versions of songs from The Wizard of Oz.
- %
- May a Misguided Platypus lay its Eggs in your Jockey Shorts.
- %
- May the fleas of a thousand camels infest your armpits.
- %
- May your camel be as swift as the wind.
- %
- May your Tongue stick to the Roof of your Mouth with the Force of a
- Thousand Caramels.
- %
- Meester, do you vant to buy a duck?
- %
- Memory should be the starting point of the present.
- %
- Mene, mene, tekel, upharsen.
- %
- Metermaids eat their young.
- %
- Microbiology Lab: Staph Only!
- %
- Mirrors should reflect a little before throwing back images.
- -- Jean Cocteau
- %
- Mobius strippers never show you their back side.
- %
- Moebius always does it on the same side.
- %
- Monday is an awful way to spend one seventh of your life.
- %
- Most burning issues generate far more heat than light.
- %
- Most general statements are false, including this one.
- -- Alexander Dumas
- %
- Mother Earth is not flat!
- %
- Mother is far too clever to understand anything she does not like.
- -- Arnold Bennett
- %
- Mount St. Helens should have used earth control.
- %
- Must be getting close to town -- we're hitting more people.
- %
- My interest is in the future because I am going to spend the rest of my
- life there.
- %
- My, how you've changed since I've changed.
- %
- 'Naomi, sex at noon taxes.' I moan.
- Never odd or even.
- A man, a plan, a canal, Panama.
- Madam, I'm Adam.
- Sit on a potato pan, Otis.
- Sit on Otis.
- -- The Mad Palindromist
- %
- Never be afraid to tell the world who you are.
- -- Anonymous
- %
- Never use "etc." -- it makes people think there is more where there is not
- or that there is not space to list it all, etc.
- %
- Never volunteer for anything.
- -- Lackland
- %
- New members are urgently needed in the Society for Prevention of
- Cruelty to Yourself. Apply within.
- %
- Nietzsche is pietzsche, but Schiller is killer, and Goethe is moethe.
- %
- No bird soars too high if he soars with his own wings.
- -- William Blake
- %
- No guts, no glory.
- %
- No matter how cynical you get, it's impossible to keep up.
- %
- No matter how much you do you never do enough.
- %
- No small art is it to sleep: it is necessary for that purpose to keep
- awake all day.
- -- Nietzsche
- %
- No yak too dirty; no dumpster too hollow.
- %
- Nobody ever died from oven crude poisoning.
- %
- Non-Determinism is not meant to be reasonable.
- -- M.J. 0'Donnell
- %
- Non-sequiturs make me eat lampshades.
- %
- Nostalgia is living life in the past lane.
- %
- Nostalgia isn't what it used to be.
- %
- Not to laugh, not to lament, not to curse, but to understand.
- -- Spinoza
- %
- Nothing can be done in one trip.
- -- Snider
- %
- Nothing cures insomnia like the realization that it's time to get up.
- %
- Nothing is so firmly believed as that which we least know.
- -- Michel de Montaigne
- %
- Nothing is so often irretrievably missed as a daily opportunity.
- -- Ebner-Eschenbach
- %
- Nothing lasts forever.
- Where do I find nothing?
- %
- NOTICE:
-
- -- THE ELEVATORS WILL BE OUT OF ORDER TODAY --
-
- (The nearest working elevator is in the building across the street.)
- %
- Now there's a violent movie titled, "The Croquet Homicide," or "Murder
- With Mallets Aforethought."
- -- Shelby Friedman, WSJ.
- %
- Nudists are people who wear one-button suits.
- %
- O imitators, you slavish herd!
- -- Quintus Horatius Flaccus (Horace)
- %
- O.K., fine.
- %
- Odets, where is thy sting?
- -- George S. Kaufman
- %
- Oh yeah? Well, I remember when sex was dirty and the air was clean.
- %
- Oh, well, I guess this is just going to be one of those lifetimes.
- %
- Oh, wow! Look at the moon!
- %
- Once I finally figured out all of life's answers, they changed the questions.
- %
- Onward through the fog.
- %
- Operator, please trace this call and tell me where I am.
- %
- Our houseplants have a good sense of humous.
- %
- Our problems are so serious that the best way to talk about them is
- lightheartedly.
- %
- Over the years, I've developed my sense of deja vu so acutely that now
- I can remember things that *have* happened before ...
- %
- Paranoid Club meeting this Friday. Now ... just try to find out where!
- %
- Pardon me while I laugh.
- %
- Paul Revere was a tattle-tale.
- %
- Peace be to this house, and all that dwell in it.
- %
- Phone call for chucky-pooh.
- %
- Piece of cake!
- -- G.S. Koblas
- %
- Plastic... Aluminum... These are the inheritors of the Universe!
- Flesh and Blood have had their day... and that day is past!
- -- Green Lantern Comics
- %
- Please help keep the world clean: others may wish to use it.
- %
- Please remain calm, it's no use both of us being hysterical at the same time.
- %
- Predestination was doomed from the start.
- %
- Prediction is very difficult, especially of the future.
- -- Niels Bohr
- %
- Preserve the old, but know the new.
- %
- Progress might have been all right once, but it's gone on too long.
- -- Ogden Nash
- %
- Progress was all right. Only it went on too long.
- -- James Thurber
- %
- Punning is the worst vice, and there's no vice versa.
- %
- Pyros of the world... IGNITE !!!
- %
- QED.
- %
- Quack!
- Quack!! Quack!!
- %
- Question: Is it better to abide by the rules until they're changed or
- help speed the change by breaking them?
- %
- Quick!! Act as if nothing has happened!
- %
- Quod erat demonstrandum.
- [Thus it is proven. For those who wondered WTF QED means.]
- %
- Rainy days and automatic weapons always get me down.
- %
- Rainy days and Mondays always get me down.
- %
- Reality -- what a concept!
- -- Robin Williams
- %
- Remember that there is an outside world to see and enjoy.
- -- Hans Liepmann
- %
- Remember the... the... uhh.....
- %
- Remember, drive defensively! And of course, the best defense is a good offense!
- %
- Resisting temptation is easier when you think you'll probably get
- another chance later on.
- %
- Ring around the collar.
- %
- Rubber bands have snappy endings!
- %
- Safety Third.
- %
- Sailors in ships, sail on! Even while we died, others rode out the storm.
- %
- Sank heaven for leetle curls.
- %
- Santa Claus is watching!
- %
- Santa's elves are just a bunch of subordinate Clauses.
- %
- Satire does not look pretty upon a tombstone.
- %
- Save the bales!
- %
- Save the Whales -- Harpoon a Honda.
- %
- Save the whales. Collect the whole set.
- %
- See, these two penguins walked into a bar, which was really stupid, 'cause
- the second one should have seen it.
- %
- She has an alarm clock and a phone that don't ring -- they applaud.
- %
- She's genuinely bogus.
- %
- "Sheriff, we gotta catch Black Bart."
- "Oh, yeah? What's he look like?"
- "Well, he's wearin' a paper hat, a paper shirt, paper pants and
- paper boots."
- "What's he wanted for?"
- "Rustling."
- %
- Shirley MacLaine died today in a freak psychic collision today. Two freaks
- in a van [Oh no!! It's the Copyright Police!!] Her aura-charred body was
- laid to rest after a eulogy by Jackie Collins, fellow member of SAFE [Society
- of Asinine Flake Entertainers]. Excerpted from some of his more quotable
- comments:
-
- "Truly a woman of the times. These times, those times..."
- "A Renaissance woman. Why in 1432..."
- "A man for all seasons. Really..."
-
- After the ceremony, Shirley thanked her mourners and explained how delightful
- it was to "get it together" again, presumably referring to having her now dead
- body join her long dead brain.
- %
- Sight is a faculty; seeing is an art.
- %
- Silence is the element in which great things fashion themselves.
- -- Thomas Carlyle
- %
- Silence is the only virtue you have left.
- %
- Slang is language that takes off its coat, spits on its hands, and goes to work.
- %
- Sleep is for the weak and sickly.
- %
- Smear the road with a runner!!
- %
- Solipsists of the World... you are already united.
- -- Kayvan Sylvan
- %
- Some changes are so slow, you don't notice them. Others are so fast,
- they don't notice you.
- %
- Some parts of the past must be preserved, and some of the future prevented
- at all costs.
- %
- Some people live life in the fast lane. You're in oncoming traffic.
- %
- Someday we'll look back on this moment and plow into a parked car.
- -- Evan Davis
- %
- Someday you'll get your big chance -- or have you already had it?
- %
- Someday, Weederman, we'll look back on all this and laugh... It will
- probably be one of those deep, eerie ones that slowly builds to a
- blood-curdling maniacal scream... but still it will be a laugh.
- -- Mister Boffo
- %
- Somehow I reached excess without ever noticing when I was passing through
- satisfaction.
- -- Ashleigh Brilliant
- %
- Somehow, the world always affects you more than you affect it.
- %
- Sometimes, too long is too long.
- -- Joe Crowe
- %
- Somewhere, something incredible is waiting to be known.
- -- Carl Sagan
- %
- Sooner or later you must pay for your sins.
- (Those who have already paid may disregard this cookie).
- %
- Sorry. I forget what I was going to say.
- %
- Sorry. Nice try.
- %
- Stability itself is nothing else than a more sluggish motion.
- %
- Stamp out philately.
- %
- Standing on head makes smile of frown, but rest of face also upside down.
- %
- Stealing a rhinoceros should not be attempted lightly.
- %
- Stop me, before I kill again!
- %
- Support the Girl Scouts!
- (Today's Brownie is tomorrow's Cookie!)
- %
- Take it easy, we're in a hurry.
- %
- Take what you can use and let the rest go by.
- -- Ken Kesey
- %
- Tempt me with a spoon!
- %
- Thank you for observing all safety precautions.
- %
- That's odd. That's very odd. Wouldn't you say that's very odd?
- %
- That's what she said.
- %
- The adjective is the banana peel of the parts of speech.
- -- Clifton Fadiman
- %
- The beauty of a pun is in the "Oy!" of the beholder.
- %
- The best prophet of the future is the past.
- %
- The cart has no place where a fifth wheel could be used.
- -- Herbert von Fritzlar
- %
- The day advanced as if to light some work of mine; it was morning,
- and lo! now it is evening, and nothing memorable is accomplished.
- -- H.D. Thoreau
- %
- The day after tomorrow is the third day of the rest of your life.
- %
- The difference between this place and yogurt is that yogurt has a live culture.
- %
- The eagle may soar, but the weasel never gets sucked into a jet engine.
- %
- The executioner is, I hear, very expert, and my neck is very slender.
- -- Anne Boleyn
- %
- The fact that it works is immaterial.
- -- L. Ogborn
- %
- ... the flaw that makes perfection perfect.
- %
- The future isn't what it used to be. (It never was.)
- %
- The future lies ahead.
- %
- The future not being born, my friend, we will abstain from baptizing it.
- -- George Meredith
- %
- The grass is always greener on the other side of your sunglasses.
- %
- The groundhog is like most other prophets; it delivers its message and then
- disappears.
- %
- The hearing ear is always found close to the speaking tongue, a custom
- whereof the memory of man runneth not howsomever to the contrary, nohow.
- %
- The important thing to remember about walking on eggs is not to hop.
- %
- "The jig's up, Elman."
- "Which jig?"
- -- Jeff Elman
- %
- The Killer Ducks are coming!!!
- %
- The last person who said that (God rest his soul) lived to regret it.
- %
- The luck that is ordained for you will be coveted by others.
- %
- The Martian Canals were clearly the Martian's last ditch effort!
- %
- The mosquito exists to keep the mighty humble.
- %
- The most important things, each person must do for himself.
- %
- The one good thing about repeating your mistakes is that you know when to
- cringe.
- %
- The past always looks better than it was. It's only pleasant because
- it isn't here.
- -- Finley Peter Dunne (Mr. Dooley)
- %
- The philosopher's treatment of a question is like the treatment of an illness.
- -- Wittgenstein.
- %
- The pollution's at that awkward stage. Too thick to navigate and too
- thin to cultivate.
- -- Doug Sneyd
- %
- The problem with any unwritten law is that you don't know where to go
- to erase it.
- -- Glaser and Way
- %
- The reader this message encounters not failing to understand is cursed.
- %
- The rose of yore is but a name, mere names are left to us.
- %
- The sheep died in the wool.
- %
- The sheep that fly over your head are soon to land.
- %
- The shortest distance between any two puns is a straight line.
- %
- The sixth sheik's sixth sheep's sick.
- [so say said sentence sextuply...]
- %
- The sky is blue so we know where to stop mowing.
- -- Judge Harold T. Stone
- %
- The tree in which the sap is stagnant remains fruitless.
- -- Hosea Ballou
- %
- The whole earth is in jail and we're plotting this incredible jailbreak.
- -- Wavy Gravy
- %
- The whole world is a scab. The point is to pick it constructively.
- -- Peter Beard
- %
- The world really isn't any worse. It's just that the news coverage
- is so much better.
- %
- The world wants to be deceived.
- -- Sebastian Brant
- %
- The worst part of valor is indiscretion.
- %
- Then, gently touching my face, she hesitated for a moment as her incredible
- eyes poured forth into mine love, joy, pain, tragedy, acceptance, and peace.
- "'Bye for now," she said warmly.
- -- Thea Alexander, "2150 A.D."
- %
- There are no rules for March. March is spring, sort of, usually, March
- means maybe, but don't bet on it.
- %
- There are three things I always forget. Names, faces -- the third I
- can't remember.
- -- Italo Svevo
- %
- There are two kinds of pedestrians... the quick and the dead.
- -- Lord Thomas Rober Dewar
- %
- There has been an alarming increase in the number of things you know
- nothing about.
- %
- There is a natural hootchy-kootchy to a goldfish.
- -- Walt Disney
- %
- There is always someone worse off than yourself.
- %
- There is always something new out of Africa.
- -- Gaius Plinius Secundus
- %
- There is no such thing as a problem without a gift for you in its hands.
- %
- There is nothing new except what has been forgotten.
- -- Marie Antoinette
- %
- There seems no plan because it is all plan.
- -- C.S. Lewis
- %
- There's no real need to do housework -- after four years it doesn't get
- any worse.
- %
- There's nothing very mysterious about you, except that
- nobody really knows your origin, purpose, or destination.
- %
- They finally got King Midas, I hear. Gild by association.
- %
- They just buzzed and buzzed...buzzed.
- %
- Think big. Pollute the Mississippi.
- %
- Think honk if you're a telepath.
- %
- Think sideways!
- -- Ed De Bono
- %
- This is NOT a repeat.
- %
- This is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday. And now you know why.
- %
- This must be morning. I never could get the hang of mornings.
- %
- This sentence contradicts itself -- no actually it doesn't.
- -- Douglas Hofstadter
- %
- This sentence does in fact not have the property it claims not to have.
- %
- This sentence no verb.
- %
- Three minutes' thought would suffice to find this out; but thought is
- irksome and three minutes is a long time.
- -- A.E. Houseman
- %
- Three o'clock in the afternoon is always just a little too late or a little
- too early for anything you want to do.
- -- Jean-Paul Sartre
- %
- Time is but the stream I go a-fishing in.
- -- Henry David Thoreau
- %
- Time will end all my troubles, but I don't always approve of Time's methods.
- %
- Tis man's perdition to be safe, when for the truth he ought to die.
- %
- To generalize is to be an idiot.
- -- William Blake
- %
- To love is good, love being difficult.
- %
- To see you is to sympathize.
- %
- "To vacillate or not to vacillate, that is the question ... or is it?"
- %
- Topologists are just plane folks.
- Pilots are just plane folks.
- Carpenters are just plane folks.
- Midwest farmers are just plain folks.
- Musicians are just playin' folks.
- Whodunit readers are just Spillane folks.
- Some Londoners are just P. Lane folks.
- %
- Trouble always comes at the wrong time.
- %
- Trouble strikes in series of threes, but when working around the house the
- next job after a series of three is not the fourth job -- it's the start of
- a brand new series of three.
- %
- True to our past we work with an inherited, observed, and accepted vision of
- personal futility, and of the beauty of the world.
- -- David Mamet
- %
- Two cars in every pot and a chicken in every garage.
- %
- Use a pun, go to jail.
- %
- Wait for that wisest of all counselors, Time.
- -- Pericles
- %
- Wanna buy a duck?
- %
- Wasting time is an important part of living.
- %
- We have ears, earther...FOUR OF THEM!
- %
- We have lingered long enough on the shores of the Cosmic Ocean.
- -- Carl Sagan
- %
- We must die because we have known them.
- -- Ptah-hotep, 2000 B.C.
- %
- We'll cross that bridge when we come back to it later.
- %
- Welcome to the Zoo!
- %
- Well thaaaaaaat's okay.
- %
- Well, the handwriting is on the floor.
- -- Joe E. Lewis
- %
- Well, we'll really have a party, but we've gotta post a guard outside.
- -- Eddie Cochran, "Come On Everybody"
- %
- What causes the mysterious death of everyone?
- %
- What color is a chameleon on a mirror?
- %
- "What did you do when the ship sank?"
- "I grabbed a cake of soap and washed myself ashore."
- %
- What does "it" mean in the sentence "What time is it?"?
- %
- What excuses stand in your way? How can you eliminate them?
- -- Roger von Oech
- %
- What happens when you cut back the jungle? It recedes.
- %
- What is the sound of one hand clapping?
- %
- What soon grows old? Gratitude.
- -- Aristotle
- %
- "What time is it?"
- "I don't know, it keeps changing."
- %
- What we cannot speak about we must pass over in silence.
- -- Wittgenstein
- %
- What will you do if all your problems aren't solved by the time you die?
- %
- What you want, what you're hanging around in the world waiting for, is for
- something to occur to you.
- -- Robert Frost
-
- [Quoted in "VMS Internals and Data Structures", V4.4, when
- referring to AST's.]
- %
- What!? Me worry?
- -- Alfred E. Newman
- %
- What's all this brouhaha?
- %
- What's so funny?
- %
- "What's the use of a good quotation if you can't change it?"
- -- The Doctor
- %
- Whatever became of eternal truth?
- %
- When a camel flies, no one laughs if it doesn't get very far!
- %
- When a cow laughs, does milk come out of its nose?
- %
- When a fly lands on the ceiling, does it do a half roll or a half loop?
- %
- When does later become never?
- %
- When eating an elephant take one bite at a time.
- -- Gen. C. Abrams
- %
- When pleasure remains, does it remain a pleasure?
- %
- When the English language gets in my way, I walk over it.
- -- Billy Sunday
- %
- When things go well, expect something to explode, erode, collapse or
- just disappear.
- %
- When you dial a wrong number you never get a busy signal.
- %
- When you're down and out, lift up your voice and shout, "I'M DOWN AND OUT"!
- %
- When you're ready to give up the struggle, who can you surrender to?
- %
- When your memory goes, forget it!
- %
- Where am I? Who am I? Am I? I
- %
- Where will it all end? Probably somewhere near where it all began.
- %
- Whereof one cannot speak, thereof one must be silent.
- -- Wittgenstein
- %
- Which is worse: ignorance or apathy? Who knows? Who cares?
- %
- Whip it, whip it good!
- %
- Who are you?
- %
- Who dat who say "who dat" when I say "who dat"?
- -- Hattie McDaniel
- %
- Who messed with my anti-paranoia shot?
- %
- Who will take care of the world after you're gone?
- %
- Why are you so hard to ignore?
- %
- Why do seagulls live near the sea? 'Cause if they lived near the bay,
- they'd be called baygulls.
- %
- Why does a ship carry cargo and a truck carry shipments?
- %
- Why is it called a funny bone when it hurts so much?
- %
- Why is it taking so long for her to bring out all the good in you?
- %
- Why isn't there a special name for the tops of your feet?
- -- Lily Tomlin
- %
- Why not go out on a limb? Isn't that where the fruit is?
- %
- Why would anyone want to be called "Later"?
- %
- Without adventure, civilization is in full decay.
- -- Alfred North Whitehead
- %
- Would that my hand were as swift as my tongue.
- -- Alfieri
- %
- Would you care to drift aimlessly in my direction?
- %
- Would you care to view the ruins of my good intentions?
- %
- WRONG!
- %
- You auto buy now.
- %
- You can cage a swallow, can't you,
- but you can't swallow a cage, can you?
- Girl, bathing on Bikini, eyeing boy,
- finds boy eyeing bikini on bathing girl.
- A man, a plan, a canal -- Panama!
- -- The Palindromist
- %
- You can get there from here, but why on earth would you want to?
- %
- "You've got to think about tomorrow!"
- "TOMORROW! I haven't even prepared for *_________yesterday* yet!"
- %
- Zeus gave Leda the bird.
- %
-