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- From: joyce@apple.com (Joyce Wermont)
- Newsgroups: alt.support.big-folks
- Subject: re: CHOOSING to be attracted to someone
- Message-ID: <71908@apple.Apple.COM>
- Date: 2 Sep 92 01:53:30 GMT
- Sender: joyce@Apple.COM
- Distribution: usa
- Organization: Apple Computer Inc, Cupertino, CA
- Lines: 36
-
-
- I think Sheryl has been saying that sexual attraction consists not only
- of internal impulses, but is socially constructed as well. Both things
- are true. Without going into a long discussion on the nature of sexuality
- (which I'm sure belongs in another newsgroup), I think it's fair to say
- that among many other things, people's *thoughts and beliefs* play an
- important role in their sexuality as well as their instincts.
-
- As Sheryl said, some people are more affected by societal brainwashing
- than others. But I agree that we're all affected to some degree. Perhaps
- society can never stamp out the spark of individuality completely (I
- like to think this is true), but it sure has a damn good influence. When
- we're given the message over and over that certain people are inappropriate
- as objects of desire - whether because they're fat, the same sex, a different
- race, or whatever - that clearly *will* affect the amount of openness
- we have toward viewing those groups of people in a sexual way. People
- will often deny or repress sexual feelings if they're taught those
- feelings are wrong. For others, it may not even *occur* to them that
- they could find such a person sexually attractive.
-
- But when people are given opportunities to view those "inappropriate"
- people in a sexual way, I think some - not all, but some - do open up
- to it. We can't really know what people would feel in a culture totally
- free of prejudices - there's too much "ought" for there to be "is" - but
- I'm willing to bet that it would be different.
-
- What I mean by "opportunities" is not more brainwashing, with yet
- another set of standards. Instead, I mean providing people with positive
- images and messages about fat people (or gay people, etc), so that
- we can have the thoughts and beliefs necessary to allow ourselves
- the *possibility* of feeling sexual toward them. Then, if the instinct
- is there, it will have the chance to be expressed.
-
- Joyce Wermont
- joyce@apple.com
-
-