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- Path: sparky!uunet!ulowell!m2c!nic.umass.edu!noc.near.net!news.bbn.com!bbn.com!kgorman
- From: kgorman@bbn.com (Karen Gorman)
- Newsgroups: soc.singles
- Subject: Re: Honesty, Your word, and Trust -- a crisis?
- Message-ID: <lmdet5INN2oa@news.bbn.com>
- Date: 27 Jan 93 16:43:17 GMT
- References: <JMD.93Jan22123711@lion.bear.com> <C19ryE.39C@portal.hq.videocart.com> <JMD.93Jan27092706@lion.bear.com>
- Lines: 32
- NNTP-Posting-Host: bbn.com
-
- In article <JMD.93Jan27092706@lion.bear.com>, jmd@bear.com (Josh Diamond) writes:
- >
- > In article <77584@apple.apple.COM> stef@Apple.COM (Stef Jones) writes:
- >
- >>Yup. Yet another breakdown in communication. We are unwilling to
- >>confront each other on even the smallest issues. So the issues
- >>aggregate, and snowball until they become a major issue. The kind
- >>that cause relationships to fail. Even the kind that causes wars.
-
- I agree with Stef's statements above. When I find myself avoiding a
- discussion/confrontation with someone on an issue that is annoying me, I
- usually find it is due to the fact that I don't want to hurt the other person's
- feelings. If the issue at hand continues to annoy me and the person hasn't
- gotten/taken any of the hints that I've given, I will take the intiative
- and talk to that person and tell him/her my true feelings. I try to do this as
- delicately as possible without getting upset. However, if the other person
- starts to get agitated I too may get the same way, but I really try not to. If
- the reaction to my request/gripe is too strong, I'll walk away for an
- indefinite amount of time and usually wait for the person to contact me - I can
- be very stubborn/patient when I feel an injustice has been done to me.
-
- I think the best approach to any situation where there is a conflict is to nip
- it in the bud before it blossoms into a full scale war. This approach
- seems to work well for me (as much as I may hate to confront the issue at hand
- initially)...better now than later.
-
- > I'm really annoyed at the self-righteous tone of this thread.
-
- I'm not.
-
- Karen
- kg@bbn.com
-