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- From: ecameron@orach.mrc.unm.edu ()
- Newsgroups: alt.tv.mst3k
- Subject: TONIGHT ONLY!
- Date: 24 Jan 1993 06:19:18 GMT
- Organization: University of Idaho, Moscow--NOT
- Lines: 117
- Distribution: world
- Message-ID: <1jtcd6INN9m9@lynx.unm.edu>
- NNTP-Posting-Host: orach.mrc.unm.edu
-
-
- Well, here it is...
-
- The SOL Community Theater
- Sings hits from
- "HIRED!"
- featuring
- Mort Cambot
- and his
- orchestra
-
-
- TCG: (He's hired, he's hired, he's hired, he's hired).
- J: I'm hired.
- TCG: (He's hired).
- J: I hope I don't get fired.
- TCG: (He's hired).
- J: In forty years I'll be retired.
- But for now, I'm simply hired.
- TCG: (He's hired, he's hired, he's hired, he's hired).
- J: I got a job today.
- TCG: (He's hired).
- J: I'm selling Chevrolets.
- TCG: (He's hired).
- J: I'm bringing home good pay.
- TCG: (He's hired).
- J: I just got hired.
- TCG: (He's hired, he's hired, he's hired, he's hired).
- (He got a job today).
- J: Yeah, me!
- TCG: (He's selling Chevrolets).
- J: We're gonna get awnings.
- TCG: He's bringing home good pay).
- J: Maybe even dessert.
- I just got hired. (He just got hired).
- ALL: HIRED!
-
- -----
-
- <Knock, knock, knock>
- J: I was wondering if you'd like to see my...
- G: No!
- J: But I really think you should see my...
- T: No!
- J: It's got a lovely...
- G: No!
- J: And if only you would...
- C: No!
- TCG: Can't you see we're trying to tell you no!
-
- -----
-
- T: (Ahh). Zero's, zero's. None of my salesmen has ever
- sold a car. (Ohh).
- Sometimes I think I might be pushing them too far.
- I think I'll hit the bar.
- And try to get my mind off zero's.
- G: (Zero's).
- T: Zero's.
- G: (Zero's).
- T: All of my salesmen a-r-e zero's. (Aah).
-
- -----
-
- C: Good evening, sonny.
- T: Hi, dad.
- C: You look depressed.
- T: I am.
- G: Come on and have some lemonade.
- T: Thanks, mom, but that won't help.
- C: Just get it off your chest.
- T: OK. <MUSIC SPEEDS UP> I suck at my job.
- C: No, you don't.
- T: Yes, I do.
- G: (Oh, my).
- T: My salesmen are slobs.
- C: No, they aren't.
- T: Yes, they do.
- G: (Ohh).
- T: I'd like to make a sell, but what can I do?
- I'm gonna be a failure just like you, dad.
- C: Like me?
- T: That's right, I'll be a failure just like y-o-u!
- C: (Now, frikl...so...).
-
- -----
-
- J: Extry, extry, read all about it.
- Pearl Harbor bombed.
- Roosevelt declares war.
- T: Well, that's it!
- C: What's it?
- T: Uncle Sam's gonna need cars. Why, selling Chevrolets
- is gonna help the war effort. Don't ya see, Dad?
- Come on everybody!
- ALL: S-e-e the U-S-A in the...
- J: We got Commercial Sign. <random oh's and uh's>.
- T: (For crying out loud...).
- C: (What's the point...).
- J: (Commercial sign).
-
-
- Well, what do you think, Sirs?
-
-
-
- ---
- AMANDA -ecameron@groucho.mrc.unm.edu
- =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
- = "Killing your own clone is still murder..." =
- = -Odo, ST:DS9, A Man Alone- =
- =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
- --
- =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
- = These opinions are MINE, all MINE =
- = --Keep your grubby hands OFF!!-- =
- =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
-