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- Path: sparky!uunet!olivea!pagesat!netsys!agate!rsoft!mindlink!a7975
- From: Scott_Leaf@mindlink.bc.ca (Scott Leaf)
- Newsgroups: alt.alien.visitors
- Subject: Finally a REAL Alien !!!
- Message-ID: <19937@mindlink.bc.ca>
- Date: 23 Jan 93 11:04:08 GMT
- Sender: news@deep.rsoft.bc.ca (Usenet)
- Organization: MIND LINK! - British Columbia, Canada
- Lines: 38
-
- TO hell with all this talk of ST:TNG & DS9, I have a real Alien story.
-
- I know an alien and he walks among us, his name is Michael Cordani and he
- lives at 20616 Tyner Avenue, Maple Ridge, British Columbia, Canada.
-
- He fits the typical Alien profile, loner, quiet, keeps to himself, involved
- in strange activities, doesnt have a girlfriend but the most telling clue as
- to his true origin is the Space Ship he has in his yard under a tarp.
-
- His skin is really a synthetic latex which has been chemically enhanced here
- on earth with a regiment of exercise and Steroids though it is obviously not
- real skin as it remains paisely white even near the end of a scorching
- Summer.
-
- He consumes vast quantities of liquid proteins and alien nutrients that turn
- the stomach of a human being, thus he usually hides his eating habits from
- all but a select few decipiles that he has chosen for the quickening.
-
- I am concerned that the government is missing out on a real opportunity to
- lock him up and study him, take samples of his urine, nose hairs and all the
- rest of those tell-tale alien differences. You'd think they'd jump at the
- chance to study a freak like Cordani, sheeesh what has this world come
- to...oh if this was still the 50's he'd be locked up in Hangar 18 and freeze
- dried so fast it would never even register in those alien grey cells.
-
- SOme of you may think me callous for wanting him freeze dried, what of the
- great advantages of knowing his alien technologies you ask? Well I have
- spoken to him and I think that I know why he was selected to come to this far
- point in the universe over all the other creatures of his civilization. The
- fact is he is an idiot, incompetent of any real use on a meaningful planet so
- he was sent here. This explains how most of the aliens who are now on Earth
- have come to be here, especially why they havnt been able to take us over
- even though we know that they have been here for years!
-
- Now that my friends is a real Alien Story!
-
- (Who is is Dear? Its a quaint little man from the village, something about
- the reaping!)
-