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- Path: sparky!uunet!ogicse!flop.ENGR.ORST.EDU!leela.CS.ORST.EDU!jacobs.CS.ORST.EDU!petersm
- From: petersm@jacobs.CS.ORST.EDU (Marguerite Petersen)
- Newsgroups: rec.arts.poems
- Subject: Re: sonata... / Marek "love as a drug", "sex as need", Re: Need - A Poem
- Message-ID: <1h4c12INN4rm@leela.CS.ORST.EDU>
- Date: 21 Dec 92 12:06:58 GMT
- Article-I.D.: leela.1h4c12INN4rm
- References: <1gsiasINN3o@leela.CS.ORST.EDU> <BzJtvp.8wz@undergrad.math.waterloo.edu> <1992Dec20.164757.18166@news.cs.indiana.edu>
- Organization: Computer Science Outreach Services - Oregon State University
- Lines: 116
- NNTP-Posting-Host: jacobs.cs.orst.edu
-
- In article <1992Dec20.164757.18166@news.cs.indiana.edu> marek@moose.cs.indiana.edu (Marek Lugowski) writes:
- >[poem follows]
- >
- >In article <BzJtvp.8wz@undergrad.math.waterloo.edu>
- >gdnikoli@undergrad.math.waterloo.edu (Greg Nikolic) writes:
- >> petersm@jacobs.CS.ORST.EDU (Marguerite Petersen) writes:
- >>>In light of recent postings Re:referring to the act of sex as fucking I
- >>>was inspired to write the following. It contains neither flowery allusion
- >>>nor the word fuck, but I think you will get the message nonetheless. :-)
- >>> I am the answer
- >>> to your need
- >>> and I am willing
- >>> to answer your need
- >> [rest of enrapturing poem left out]
- >>
- >> Finally! A good, sold, erotic poem, from a woman no less. Well written.
- >>If you have any sequels in mind post them please.
- >
- >I was promising myself not to comment on Marg's poem, i.e. let it be,
- >let it be, in the spirit of John Lennon and Merry Berry, but you, Dear
- >Greg, supplied the drop that runneth the chalice over. I apologize
- >for any bruises this may cause; the tone will be polite and lite. :)
-
- Ahhhh, where to start? I guess I'll just jump right in. Thanks for
- being polite although I assure you it isn't necessary. I know I came
- down rather hard on whatisname for beating up on defenseless newcomers,
- but I am capable of taking whatever is thrown my way. :-)
-
- >Marg's poem uses the "sex as need" metaphor which I find unsatisfying, and
- >on reflection, even Marg should find confining. Is sex heroin? do you really
- >want to feel compelled or do you want to fuck of your free desire? Do you
- >want to be in control of your life or do you want your life to control you?
- >Your need sounds like being in heat or rut and, well, needing it. It is one
- >thing to be overcome by desire and quite another to need money, or need
- >oxygen, or need to urinate. Anyone who seriously says "I need to get laid"
- >has heard too many pop songs or is overstating their requirements.
-
- "Act in haste, repent at leisure." I would have been better off to have
- remembered this. In my haste to post a poem that was erotic yet was
- neither flowery and insipid, nor used words that *some* consider vulgar,
- I chose a title and and a metaphor which (although quite correct as
- defined in the dictionary as *want*) nevertheless does have other
- connotations for some. By the way I am not one of those who considers
- the word *fuck* to be vulgar, obscene or to have connotations of
- brutality. I agree with you that it is a perfectly good Anglo-Saxon
- word to describe the sex act. It does however have very negative
- connotations for a great many people.
-
- I also think there are various levels of *need*. And no, sex is not in
- the same category of need that oxygen and food, etc. are. However, I do
- think it is a need of every being, IMHO, although I admit there are
- those who will disagree. I have no desire to argue that point, however.
- That may just be me.
-
- >This leads us to suspect sentimentality in a poem that has one lover
- >assure the other that the need is detected and a need will be met.
- >Marie and I satirized one rap commentator's reference to me as Marie's
- >"primary care-giver" in a poem I re-posted recently pretty much on
- >these grounds. Even femnists fall into the trap of this metaphor,
- >which I find funny though unfortunate. This is related, semiotically,
- >to the "love is a drug" metaphor which we hear on the radio as well,
- >in part because there are no adequate images for expressing strong
- >sexual desire directly.
-
- I am my *own* care-giver. I ask nothing from anyone. I do, however,
- give freely of that which I *choose* to give.
-
- >Love is not a drug. Love is a state of mind, which means it is
- >mediated by neurotransmitters. A drug would be something that
- >interferes with your neurotransmitters, like caffeine. Caffeine is a
- >drug. I wish more people would talk in their poems about coffee and
- >their need for it and about meeting their lovers' need for it, and
- >about coffee being a drug.
-
- I agree that love is not a drug. My poem, however, was not about love.
- Love is very complicated and I'm not sure that I really understand it.
- I do know that I *feel* certain things for certain people and the word
- I use to describe that feeling is love, but that doesn't mean I know
- what it is. I do try on occasion to write about love, but not very
- often.
-
- >Greg seems to think that a good erotic poem should avoid obscenity
- >(whatever that is), vulgarity, pornography and upsetting language, but
- >he seems perfectly contented with masked metaphors that silently guide
- >into mentalities that are neither honest nor thoughtful. Do you want to
- >live a life with love as a drug? Sex as a need? Doesn't needing someone
- >sexually come many steps closer to objectifying women (babe, I need you)
- >than speaking frankly with clear mind (let's fuck)?
-
- I don't think a good erotic poem should necessarily avoid course or
- upsetting language. I also don't think a good erotic poem necessarily
- has to *include* course or upsetting language. I think my poem was
- erotic (and so does my SO). I'm not going to deal with your comment
- about the objectification of women as it would be much too long to
- discuss my opinions on this subject as I have been a woman for *many*
- years.
-
- >Your honor, I have no further questions. :)
-
- > -- Marek
- >
-
- I appreciate your comments and on a second thought and even a third
- and fourth, actually much of the day as I baked cookies (eat your
- heart out Hilary :-) ) and prepared a lasagne dinner, I have decided
- that perhaps a more acceptable (to you at any rate) title for my poem
- might be *Desire*. Surely, you can't have so many objections to that?
-
- Kathleen O'Toole,
- Bringer of Light
-
- --
- *************************************************************************
- "Insufficient facts always invites danger, Captain."- Spock in Space Seed
- Marg Petersen petersm@jacobs.cs.orst.edu
- *************************************************************************
-