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- Path: sparky!uunet!infoserv!wildrose!rkf
- From: rkf@wildrose.infoserv.com (Ray Fink)
- Newsgroups: soc.singles
- Subject: Re: Money and the Single World (was: Education and the Single World
- Message-ID: <xzmBrAPBBh106h@wildrose.infoserv.com>
- Date: Sun, 15 Nov 92 10:29:53 -0700
- References: <5720@jptcs.COM> <1992Nov12.022122.5197@galileo.cc.rochester.edu> <1e5l9pINN96r@FUNCTOR.SYSTEMSZ.CS.YALE.EDU>
- Reply-To: wildrose!rkf@infoserv.com
- Organization: Wild Rose Refugee Camp
- Lines: 36
-
- loosemore-sandra@cs.yale.edu (Sandra Loosemore) writes:
- >In article <5720@jptcs.COM> tps@jptcs.COM (Tim Sailer) writes:
-
- > No. In a long term relationship (read marriage), there should never be a
- > question of 'my' money and 'your' money. It gets thrown into the pot,
- > each one gets a budgetted amount for them to spend as they want (you
- > HAVE to have some 'mad money'), bills are paid, and the rest gets
- > put into savings. As long as the combined incomes are enough to support
- > you both, it shouldn't be a problem.
-
- >Well, this is a pleasant fiction, IMHO. "It shouldn't be a problem" until
- >you split up, and then you're totally screwed. I've known friends who've
- >gone through some *extremely* nasty divorces that were complicated by this
- >kind of naiveity in handling their financial arrangements. E.g., one
- >spouse found that the other had totally cleaned out their joint bank
- >accounts, trashed his credit rating, and had a restraining order preventing
- >him from trying to reclaim any of their other joint assets (furniture,
- >car, etc.) pending the divorce settlement. Similar financial problems can
- >occur in the case of death of a spouse.
-
- My ex and I used Tim's approach quite successfully when we were married, and
- were able to get through the divorce without any of the nonsense that
- Sandra describes. Then again, we had very similar incomes and views about
- money, and a relatively civil divorce. Note that if you live in a
- community property state like Idaho (my home) or California, the
- statement "what's mine is yours" is legally supported.
-
- >Love isn't a substitute for common sense when it comes to money. CYA
- >and visit a lawyer before you do anything as stupid as getting
- >married!
-
- Good advice, in more ways than one! :-)
-
- --
- -- Ray
-
-