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- Path: sparky!uunet!pipex!bnr.co.uk!dswt
- From: dswt@bnr.co.uk (Stewart Tansley)
- Newsgroups: alt.romance
- Subject: Re: Obsessive Behavior - detecting, reacting, showing (long)
- Date: 20 Nov 1992 13:26:15 GMT
- Organization: BNR Europe Ltd, London Road, Harlow, England.
- Lines: 140
- Message-ID: <1eip1nINNgaa@bHARs12c.bnr.co.uk>
- References: <7656@tekig7.PEN.TEK.COM>
- NNTP-Posting-Host: 128.199.202.41
- Keywords: OBSESSION
-
- In article <7656@tekig7.PEN.TEK.COM> doughe@tekig6.PEN.TEK.COM (Douglas E Helbling) writes:
- >
- > [About one of my favourite topics: Obsession]
- >
-
- Yay! I'm an *expert* at obsession! I have many female victims of my
- obsessions to call upon as past experiences. Also I had someone (*one*
- pah!) obsessed with me, too. Yay! Here we go... :-)
-
- > Signs of Obsession: (Is s/he or isn't s/he?)
- >
- > Is someone obsessive if they:
- >
- > * Say hello regularly (in the halls at school/work, in
- > the cafeteria, on the sidewalk in the neighborhood)
-
- Nope. Just nice. :-)
- >
- > * Send you poems in the mail
-
- Possibly. Probably just soppy & lonely.
- >
- > * Call you late in the night
-
- Almost certainly (obviously depends on *why*!).
- >
- > * Call and hang up, or call and don't say anything
-
- Definitely. Postively mental over you.
- >
- > * Call you days and weeks after you've last talked, in which
- > conversation you made it clear your relationship was over,
- > or, perhaps, that you never thought you had a relationship
-
- Psychotic. Also a bit thick.
- >
- > * Shows up at your house unannounced, demanding some minor
- > and insignificant personal item back they last remembered
- > leaving at your house.
-
- That's me! ;-) ;-) ;-) Yup, I have done this. I *was* rather fond of the girl
- once, though. :-) Do I regret it? Nope. I was obsessed. Us obsessives
- need help & sympathy, not cursing.
-
- >
- > Reactions to Obsession: (Oh, gawd, they found out my new number!!)
- >
- > Given that you have determined someone you know (or perhaps worse,
- > someone you don't know) is obsessed with you, do you:
- >
- > * Tell them, for a 2nd or third time, if necessary, that you
- > do not appreciate the attention and ask them to stop?
-
- This would work if someone used it against me, but didn't work when I used it
- myself.
- >
- > * Ignore them, hoping they'll just go away after they get tired
- > of your lack of response?
-
- Wouldn't work against a True Obsessive.
- >
- > * Tell them off?
-
- Might encourage some True Obsessives, especially if they have a masochistic
- streak.
- >
- > * Get a restraining order?
-
- Don't know what this means WRT UK law, but sounds like it would be
- effective -- until they were released...
- >
- > * Have a mutual friend or someone you or they know go and talk
- > to them for you?
-
- Pathetic.
- >
- > * Find someone else for them to be obsessed with?
-
- Constructive, but almost bound to fail.
- >
- > * Tell them you are:
- > - HIV+
- > - not interested in persons of their gender
- Both great ideas, IMHO. Former might not work in UK so well as US. Would
- work if I was the obsessed, but not sure about other people. There are
- dangers in these two, of course...
-
- > - moving to another country
-
- I would stick around until my victim borded the plane.
- > - on a weekend outing from the sanitarium
-
- I would just smile at the obvious joke. :-)
- >
- > * Shoot them?
-
- :-)
-
- >
- >
- > Avoiding Obsessive Appearance: ( I'm "In Love", not dangerous! )
- >
- > Reacting to Obsessive Assessment: (s/he thinks I'm nuts! Guess I'll
- > have to stop circling her/his block at night.)
- >
- > Okay, so your recent or long running "friend" has gotten the idea
- > that you are obsessive. They might even be "scared" of what you'll
- > do next. You, of course, know you are not, but you do have real
- > feelings for this person. Do you:
- >
- > * Say "to hell with it!"? After all, if s/he thinks you are
- > capable of <insert despicable behavior here>, then s/he really
- > doesn't have a clue as to who you are about anyway.
-
- Pah, my obsession would be stronger than that!
-
- >
- > * Give them time to relax, assume they've just seen Oprah/Sally/Phil
- > too many times this month, and call them up a few weeks later?
-
- Pah, my obsession would get me to call the next day!
-
- >
- > * Assume they've already had dealings with near-to-crazy SO's
- > in their past, and so they're not capable of distinguishing
- > honest, well-intended affection for obsessive behavior?
-
- Pah, my obsession would make me try even harder to show them I was genuine.
-
- >
-
- Well, I enjoyed writing that. Wonder if catharsis still works... :-)
-
- ===========================================================================
- Stewart Tansley | BNR Europe Limited | 'Be cool, or be
- | London Rd, Harlow, CM17 9NA, UK | cast out...'
- dswt@bnr.co.uk | +44 279 429531 x2763 (ESN 742) | Subdivisions, Rush
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