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- Newsgroups: alt.personals.ads
- Path: sparky!uunet!caen!biscuit
- From: biscuit@engin.umich.edu (George F DeLaMater)
- Subject: Re: Thanks for the mail
- Message-ID: <YNF=ca=@engin.umich.edu>
- Date: Tue, 17 Nov 92 01:14:21 EST
- Organization: University of Michigan Engineering, Ann Arbor
- References: <1992Nov16.152236.2353@gacvx2.gac.edu>
- Nntp-Posting-Host: ocher.engin.umich.edu
- Lines: 42
-
- In article <1992Nov16.152236.2353@gacvx2.gac.edu> jtako@mulato.gac.edu (Julie T Tako) writes:
-
- But my question
- >is, why do people go looking for specific long term relationships on the
- >computer? That is not something you can just advertise for and expect to
- >automatically receive, especially from an impersonal computer. O.K. I'm
-
- Well, Julie - I would contend that long-term relationships are *never*
- something you can expect to "automatically receive" under *any*
- circumstances. I guess that some people really do fall in love at
- first sight, but most people go through some process of getting to
- know one another and learning to trust one another (among other things)
- before making the decision to commit to anything deeper. While I won't
- say it *can't* happen, I find it EXTREMELY unlikely that two people
- will ever genuinely fall in love via the net!
-
- I do believe, however, that long-term relationships can *begin* via
- the net. The network is a tool which, among other things, allows
- people whose paths might not otherwise have crossed to meet. E-mail
- correspondence is a way to get to know someone and find out about
- their interests and such. A personal ad also does one more thing - it
- takes away guesswork and awkward questions. A well-written personal ad
- should effectively communicate the author's intent. Perhaps that
- intent is that said person would like to hear from persons interested
- in a long-term relationship. Fine! With luck, ONLY persons who are
- also interested in a long-term relationship will respond. That doesn't
- bind anyone to anything - all it does is let the two people know where
- the other is coming from without trying to come up with a clever way
- of indirectly asking the question.
-
- From there, it's up to the people involved - if they really get along
- well and like one another, they will probably arrange to meet at some
- point, and then see what if anything develops from there. But the net
- serves as a starting point. IMO.
-
-
-
- --
- Experience is a wonderful | George F. DeLaMater | If don't
- teacher, but fools will |-------------------------| it TOUCH
- learn from no other. | biscuit@engin.umich.edu | GLOWS it.
- -------------------------------------------------------------------------------
-