NetNews Usenet Archive 1992 #27/NN_1992_27.iso/spool/alt/folklore/computer/16514

Text File | 1992-11-20 | 3.6 KB | 81 lines

Newsgroups: alt.folklore.computers
Path: sparky!uunet!zaphod.mps.ohio-state.edu!wupost!darwin.sura.net!Sirius.dfn.de!tubsibr!pvs9
From: [e-mail] (Praktikum Verteilte Systeme)
Subject: Re: Re:help friendly alien...
Message-ID: <[e-mail]>
Originator: [e-mail]
Sender: [e-mail] (nntp inews entry)
Reply-To: [e-mail] (Praktikum Verteilte Systeme)
Organization: TU Braunschweig, Informatik (Bueltenweg), Germany
Date: Fri, 20 Nov 1992 18:50:38 GMT
Lines: 68


In article <[e-mail]>, [e-mail] writes :
}In article <[e-mail]>, glorp@planet.x                                              writes...
}>>%_}>>Hahaha! Fools! You think that's impressive? I've wired together every
}>>%_}>>computer on the Internet with Quantum-Thin Wire (tm), and programmed it
}>>%_}>>to act like a really big abacus. Running 8 x 10^100^10^10^10^4
}>>%_}>>calculations a millisecond, I hope to solve the equation 5x = 10
}>>%_}>>by sometime next week. Now _that's_ progress.
}>>%_}>Then how about this: I've constructed the first computer ever made of
}one
}>>%_}>single Hydrogen atom. There are a couple of advantages with it; 1. it
}can
}>>%_}>be inhaled for transport; 2. it relies entirely on voice-detecting for
}input,
}>>%_}>and a hologram for output (that was the tricky part), and 3. it creates
}>>%_}>two copies of itself every second, allowing for multiple processes! I'm
}>>%_}>speaking this reply right now to a cloud in front of me, using a Voice
}>>%_}>Detection version (mine, really) of X-Windows in 3D. NEXT!
}>>%_}All accomplishments pale beside mine: Managed to re-write DOS 5.0 so that
}>>%_}it breaks the the 640K barrier.
}>
}>greetings earthlings,
}>
}>i am glorp of planet x. my starship has crashed landed on earth.
}>since there are so many smart earthings here, perhaps one of you
}>can fix a fleeblebrox generator (model z9999-q) that is on the fritz.
}>any help will be appreciated.
}
}The old z9999-q model. I haven't seen one of those since the Andromeda
}galaxy imploded. Perhaps one of these lightweight engineers could handle
}this one.
}>
}>adTHANKSvance
}>glorp of planet x

Aaaaah, that good old thing. I once owned a spacecraft employing that model
too. I had the same problem once ago. There can be only two reasons :

  1.) The fluctation converter is jammed. In this case : remove the red plug,
      then screw off the metasubsynchronomic filter and clean it. Then screw
      it on again and plug the red plug in again.

  2.) More probably, the cause is the famous 1-character bug in the control
      software. There is a function named boondungl() which looks like this :

   h_andrx* boondungl(_Xanshbr_tvn)
      int _Xanshbr_tvn;
      {
          static h_andrx* xuuuuuuuu;
          int joqq;
          unicode_char v_78_K = 0xf43b;  /* this line is wrong */

          xuuuuuuuu = Nkl_win00 (42);
          xuuuuuuuu->_nHung.MxT->Dwl[_Xanshbr_tvn%xuuuuuuuu->hemt]->Shmbr[9]
          ->Xandribuuu = (Rtoff*)malloc(sizeof(h_andrx));
          jogg = (GnoBr (xuuuuuuuu, U_XXilef (_Xanshbr_tvn))?xuuuuuuuu->Zu:0);
          xuuuuuuuu->_nHung.MxT->rt->Z_7->__0b->XanBr_->iu[0] = (jogg%37);
          xuuuuuuuu->Shra = Ndelsef (v_78_K);
          return xuuuuuuuu;
      }

      The error is the code 0xf43b, which (in Intergalactic Unicode Page #768)
      means the kluzmopodian letter Dri. Intended was, instead, a kluzmopodian
      Shooum, which is 0xf33d.
      After fixing this, your z9999-q should work !

Claude (A spirit with a vision is a dream with a vision.-Neil Peart/Rush)