Call me sick, but I find the "Crime and Incidence" report in CMU's campus paper to be one of the most consistently entertaining sections. (Does that say something about me, CMU, or about the campus rag, hmmm.)
The best one from the last 7 years was the story about this CMU professor whose car stalled in front of the university. He's trying frantically to start it, with no success. Three guys come up, say, "Hey, you need any help? I bet we can start your car for you." The professor gets out of the car. The guys get in. The guys start the car, and drive off, leaving the professor with an incredibly stupid look on his face.
