NetNews Usenet Archive 1992 #27/NN_1992_27.iso/spool/alt/callahan/13944

Internet Message Format | 1992-11-20 | 6.2 KB

Path: sparky!uunet!dtix!darwin.sura.net!zaphod.mps.ohio-state.edu!rpi!batcomputer!reed!henson!news.u.washington.edu!news.uoregon.edu!aaa.uoregon.edu!user
From: [e-mail] (Jay Brandt (Jason))
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
Subject: Robin Williamson
Message-ID: <[e-mail]>
Date: 20 Nov 92 21:41:50 GMT
References: <[e-mail]>
Followup-To: alt.callahans
Organization: University of Oregon, Architecture
Lines: 126
NNTP-Posting-Host: aaa.uoregon.edu

In article <[e-mail]>, [e-mail]
(Mary Branscombe) wrote:
>
> In-Reply-To: <[e-mail]> [e-mail] (Mary Bertke....Gwen MacThaidhg)
>
> "Oooh! I just remembered. "
> Mary jumps up from Rowan's tea table.
> "Robin Williamson who I just posted about. He's coing over to
> America. Don't know where he's playing but if he's near you I can
> heartily recommend the evening. Fun, funny and romatic. Great
> combination."

Jason looks over with interest. "When? Where? Will he be coming to the West
coast? I agree, Robin Williamson's a riot." Jason flicks his fingers across
the keyboard a moment, muttering "Lets see, I should still have that post
here somewhere".

"Ah Hah! Here it is! Mary, if you like Robin's works, you will probably get
a kick out of this bit, which I resurected from a post a few months back."

--------------------
<Ping!>
<Jason appears at a table next to the corner of a small stage that has been
set up in the back of Calahans. He's dressed in a formal dinner jacket with
all the accessories, like the MC for a stage show. He reaches into a small
black sachel and extracts a thick cable. He connects one end of the cable
to a jack on the corner of the stage. The other end he attaches to the back
of his PowerBook, which he has open on the table in front of him. Next he
reaches into the sachel and sets four small spheres, about six inches in
diameter, onto the table. They have a number of lenses and shutters on
their surfaces, and each rests on three small metal feet. Finally he gets
out a microphone and stand, and sets that up on the table next to his
computer, plugging it into another port on the PowerBook. He looks up at
the crowd, and seems to be ready for some sort of performance.>

     Ahem. Well folks, I heard the good Doctor's request for our favorite
puns, and this is my entry. Unfortunately this is a pun that I can't do
alone, as it requires a group of musicians to perform it. So, with your
indulgence, and a bit of tech, I would like to introduce the originators of
my favorite pun - Robin Williamson and his Merry Band!

<The lights dim, and everyone takes a comfortable position to view the
still empty stage. Jason pulls a 3.5 inch optical disk from his jacket
pocket, inserts it into his PowerBook, and enters a few commands to get
things rolling. The four spheres float off the table to positions above
each corner of the stage, and several of their lenses project a soft light
over the performing area.>

     Welcome friends! On guitar, swanee whistle, jews harp and lead vocals,
let's welcome Robin Williamson! <A spotlight stabs out from one of the
spheres, to illuminate a man on stage in comfortable Irish clothing, with
his instruments.> On kazoo and backup vocals, Sylvia Woods! On the jug,
cheeks, animal noises and backup vocals, Chris Caswell! On Violin, animal
noises and backup vocals, Jerry McMillian! And joining Robin and his band
for this number, Pete Grant on the 10-string dobro! <As each performer is
named, another light shines on stage, and they appear, to join Robin. They
set up and prepare to play.>

     And now, from their _American Stonehenge_ album, Robin Williamson and
his Merry Band, performing _Zoo Blues_!

<The band fires up a lively, modern Celtic/Blues tune, and begins to sing,
complete with lavish sound effects performed live by the band members.
Although it is a blues song, they perform it in a fun, light hearted
manner, rather like a childrens song.>

I asped the elephant in the elevator
Where you had gone, he said you were boozing
     round with the bees
When I had the bucks deer, you were so fawn
Now my doe is gone and you're so colt to me
Camels in the zoo singing one hump or two
But I can't bear to see them no cow
I feel the loss a lot, I miss you an ocelot
I wonder who's kitten you now
My llama mama what's gnu with you
With your cat's pyjamas and his cockatoo
I'm hippo what toucan do
You sealed your fate with him

gorilla my dreams
you're a cheetah it seems
fly, fly are you lion to me
you otter be sad losing me
(for goodness snakes!)

I toad you donkey me waitin', why you hesitatin'
I'll pig you up at ape, iguana bison rings and meat you
     at your front boar
You mustang gone in his big black carp when
     he gibbon you that new mink cape
There's no depenguin on you that's for sure (sheep skate)
You played me for a sucker, at leech they said,
I was sow gull-a-bull
Ain't no mousetake you snake I'll make you egret you
     treated me so cruel
Gonna grab my cat, gonna grab my goat
Gonna ram your worms right down your throat
I kangaroo on in this sad stoat, you sealed your fate with him.

gorilla my dreams
you're a cheetah it seems
fly are you lion to me
you otter be sad, you otter be sad,
you otter be sad losing me

for goodness snakes!

<The band bows and acknowledges the crowd, and then flickers out of
existance as the spheres stop projecting and float back into Jason's
sachel. He puts everything away as the crowd responds to the performance.>

     Well folks, that's it! I count at least 50 animal puns in one two and
a half minute long song. The text only format doesn't really do the song
justice, as half the fun is in the music and sound effects that go with it.
If you want to hear the music, the album was produced in 1977 or 1978 on
the _Flying Fish_ label out of Chicago, IL, USA. Their catalog number for
the album is #FF062. I have more detailed contact information for the
record company, but I don't know if it is any good after all these years.
Hope you liked it! :-)

     Well, Gotta run, see ya all later. <He touches his PowerBook's
keyboard, and fades away again with a soft> <Ping!>

_Zoo Blues_ Copyright Robin Williamson, Sylvia Woods, Jerry McMillian,
Christopher Caswell 1977, all rights reserved.