NetNews Usenet Archive 1992 #16/NN_1992_16.iso/spool/comp/sys/laptops/2967

Internet Message Format | 1992-07-22 | 1.6 KB

Xref: sparky comp.sys.laptops:2967 rec.humor:24826
Newsgroups: comp.sys.laptops,rec.humor
Path: sparky!uunet!wupost!usc!sol.ctr.columbia.edu!destroyer!wsu-cs!wsu-eng.eng.wayne.edu!uds
From: [e-mail] (Seetamraju Udaybhaskar)
Subject: Many uses of laptop batteries...
Message-ID: <[e-mail]>
Sender: [e-mail] (Usenet News)
Reply-To: [e-mail] (Seetamraju Udaybhaskar)
Organization: Wayne State University, Detroit
Date: Wed, 29 Jul 1992 21:52:57 GMT
Lines: 24


You are walking donw the street and you notice that you are about
to be mugged (and r***d if female).  How do you protect yourself
from becoming sushi...?

step 1 : Buy a laptop computer.
Step 2 : Dont ever buy the palmtop ones which run on 2 AA size batteries...
Step 3 : Pull the battery out.
Step 4 : tap the bozos lightly onthe head with the batteries.
     Be careful! these batteries are heavy enough to smash
     golconda diamonds.  So, tap lightly.  It should do the job.
Step 5 : Because we pull the battery out in step 4, and if you have
     laptop running and beeping (all the while), then you should
     have bought a laptop which has an internal bettery (was intended
     for battery swaps, and not for mug-protection ;-)  )
Step 6 : put battery back.  Continue to extend your right arm (i.e.,
     pick up the laptop and carry it).
Step 7 : Throw away all other stuff that you lug around -- like
     the various self-protection equipment like mace etc...
     You dont need them.  Remember you have the batteries....


Seetamraju Udaya Bhaskar Sarma
(email : seetam @ ece7 . eng . wayne . edu)