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- <TD WIDTH=480><H1>The Saint</h1></TD>
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- As a kid growing up in the seventies, I only ever knew Simon Templer, aka The Saint, as played
- by Ian Ogilvy. Imagine my surprise when I discovered Roger Moore had played the definitive Saint,
- before I was even born - pretty confusing and yet ironic, considering my youth had also bypassed
- Connery as the Bond of choice. Of course I was only in single figures then and now accept the true
- masters as the only option.<p>
- Hollywood has been trawling the popular TV shows of my childhood, resulting in blockbuster
- adaptations of The Fugitive and Mission Impossible to name but two; one wonders when we
- can look forward to a film of Hart to Hart - ôhe was a self made millionaire, she was
- goiiigeous - when they met it was moiiider!ö. <p>
- In the meantime we have The Saint to contend with, brought to the big screen by Ozzie
- director Philip Noyce (Patriot Games, Dead Calm), and starring dreamboat, but somewhat
- spikey haired Val Kilmer. Remember Val? Cool Iceman in Top Gun, sword-wielding hero in
- fantasy adventure Willow (where he co-starred with his soon to be wife Joanne Whalley),
- and perhaps most famously in the lead role of the third Batman movie. Depending on who
- you believe, Kilmer was either persuaded to leave the forthcoming Batman 4 due to his
- supreme suitability for the role of the Saint, or moodily sloped off the project due
- to Arnold Schwarzenegger grabbing all the money and attention for playing the bad guy,
- ironically known as Mr Ice. Still, at least we get to see George ER Clooney bob his
- pretty head through the pointy-eared role.<p>
- So back to the big-screen Saint, hyped as one of this yearÆs big summer action movies.
- It starts predictably enough with a brief explanation of how the boy Simon Templer got
- his name and became the Saint - you know the sort of thing: feisty independent
- parentless kid having a rough time in a strict religious school, discovers his true
- role in life. Poignant moment with close up of kids face fading into Kilmer reminiscing,
- brings us bang up to date with the Saint of today - a sophisticated high-tech gentleman
- thief; fans of the Internet or product placement will be interested in the SaintÆs
- copious web and email use of a Nokia 9000 Communicator.<p>
- We see KilmerÆs Saint as the master of disguise, but not quite in the Tom Cruise
- tear-off-the-rubber-masks of Mission Impossible vein - oh no, Val washes the gel out of
- his spikey hair, pops on a long wig and puts on a German accent too fool the authorities.
- There are several such masterpieces to look forward to, but to be fair, while theyÆre all
- clearly the same man, they are quite entertaining none-the-less.<p>
- During what he claims to be his last big job, The Saint falls for lovely Elizabeth Shue
- (co starred with Nicholas Cage in Leaving Las Vegas), who plays a brilliant research
- scientist staying at Oxford University. Unfortunately the SaintÆs in disguise and is
- trying to do her over - er, in the thieving sense of the term too. She of course finds out,
- and broken hearted catches up with him - in Moscow of all places! Yes, she may be a brilliant
- scientist on the verge of a world-changing discovery, but sheÆs no covert operator, and yet
- jaunts out of Oxford and finds the Saint without an ounce of difficulty, whoÆs supposedly
- deep undercover in Russia.<p>
- Pretty unbelievable, but at least it brings them together where they can be chased around
- by various Russian bad guys in a country on the verge of political overthrow, let them grow
- closer together, but more importantly allow Val to utter words along the lines of ôif you
- want to live, stay with meö and so on.<p>
- I am however a big fan of suspending disbelief and enjoying a good mindless action romp.
- However despite a few decent moments, The Saint simply does not deliver the goods. You hope
- for a truly international set of locations, but only have portions of England and Russia to
- look at, and in line with most US movies, the Russians are truly politically messed up and
- the Brits are complete idiots.<p>
- The action quota is less than youÆd think, and the smiles are down to whether you fall
- for KilmerÆs disguises fooling the hapless british police - actually some of that is
- quite amusing however. <p>
- Perhaps the most interesting aspect of The Saint, for this writer anyway, is the range
- of respectable modern British dance music, used incidentally in the background. The
- Russian bad guys race around Moscow in souped up four wheel drives with the stereo
- curiously blaring out hits from The Chemical Brothers, Moby and Underworld. My favourite
- track is by The Saint by Orbital, used as part of the score near the end of the film,
- and in a tragic missed opportunity, one of the few times when you hear the familiar Saint
- theme. Respect may have been paid by using Roger Moore for a brief cameo voice-over, but
- missed opportunity sums up the big screen Saint overall, and itÆs a sin the hero isnÆt a Brit.
- <p>
- <STRONG>Reviewed by Gordon Laing</STRONG><p>
-
- Check out the <A HREF="http://us.imdb.com" TARGET="main">Internet Movie Database</A>. <P>
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