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- Sherry went to the pharmacy and had the prescription filled.
- The prescription called for taking Premarin and Provera on a 25-
- day cycle. She realized that she'd have to make a schedule of some
- kind to keep track of what day to take what. The pills had to be
- taken with food and had to be taken at approximately the same time
- each day. The pharmacist gave her a lengthy brochure about what
- to expect while taking hormones.
- She read that once she got back to the townhouse. Mood
- swings, weepiness, long-term risks of cancer; it was heartening to
- realize that no women in her family had ever developed breast
- cancer. No time like the present, so she fixed a sandwich and took
- her first pill. It was almost a disappointment that nothing
- happened right away.
- The ringing of the telephone startled her. In over two
- months, she hadn't had one incoming phone call. She picked up the
- handset and said hello.
- "Sherry, it's Doris. Change into jeans, a sweatshirt, and
- sneakers. I'll be over in twenty minutes to pick you up." The
- line went dead as Doris hung up without awaiting a reply.
- `Christ, what a bitch!' Sherry thought as she went upstairs
- to change. It can't be a flying day, there's no need to drive to
- the field. Well, going with the flow has worked so far. She was
- ready at the appointed time.
- Doris drove up in a Jeep, a real gasoline-powered one. Sherry
- hopped in and asked what's up.
- "Another phase of your training," she replied. "You start gun
- class today." Doris drove to a site several miles away, it was a
- rectangular building with a large earthen berm behind it. Doris
- handed Sherry the keys to the Jeep. "I'll catch a ride back, drive
- back when you're done. Go to the office and tell them your name,
- they'll take it from there."
- Sherry did as Doris told her to. The office had three men
- lounging around who looked like midwestern "good-ole boys,"
- complete with flannel shirts and yellow work boots. When she said
- her name, a tall man in his late 40s stood up and said: "Yeah,
- I've been waiting for you. My name's Keith. Let's go." Sherry
- followed him out of the office. He led the way down the corridor
- to a set of stairs, then dwon a flight to the basement. They went
- to a heavy door, he opened it and threw a set of wall switches.
- The front of the room lit up and the whine of a powerful
- ventilation fan started. They were in an indoor range. It had
- three firing points and appeared to be a 25-yard range. Each
- firing point had a target holder that moved back and forth by an
- electric motor.
- "You ever do any handgun shooting," Keith asked.
- "Some."
- "What do you shoot?"
- ".45 Colt auto."
- Keith grunted, then went to a wall cabinet. He pulled out
- some targets, tape, shooting glasses, and two pairs of large ear
- protectors. Then he unlocked another cabinet and handed Sherry a
- Colt Gold Cup .45. Sherry immediately pulled the slide back and
- locked it. "Ok, so you may know what you're doing," Keith
- admitted. He hung a 25-yard rapid-fire target on the frame and ran
- it down to the far end of the range. Then he handed Sherry a box
- of cartridges, two empty magazines, and waved her to the firing
- point.
- Sherry stepped up to the position. She dry-fired the pistol
- several times to get a feel for the trigger; it was a lot lighter
- and crisper than an issue service weapon. She locked the slide
- back, set the pistol on the counter, and loaded five rounds into
- a magazine.
- Sherry said: "Put on your hearing protection, please." She
- then put the glasses on and the earmuffs over them. She shifted
- her body as she picked up the pistol and magazine so her left foot
- was ahead of her right one. She inserted the magazine into the
- well of the pistol and slipped off the slide release, which allowed
- the slide to run forward and chamber a round.
- She held the pistol in her right hand, with her left hand
- forming a cup in which the right hand rested as if she was catching
- it. Her left elbow was bent almost 90 degrees, the right elbow was
- straight. Breath deep, let a little out, squeeeeezeee...BLAM!
- Sherry fired four more times, then Keith stepped up and brought the
- target up.
- "Not bad," he said. Sherry had hit the x-ring once, the ten
- ring twice, the nine once, and the seven ring. 46x1. She felt
- pretty good about it.
- Keith poured cold water all over her joy. "But that means
- nothing. Nobody's going to allow you to settle into a Weaver
- stance and calmly snap off five rounds at them. And for damn sure
- you won't find a Gold Cup lying around. But at least you know
- which end of a pistol does what."
- So Sherry started practical pistol training. That was a nice
- euphemism for learning how to kill someone with a pistol. "First
- thing is this," Keith said: "A pistol's a defensive weapon. It's
- what you use to stop someone from doing harm to you or someone
- else. If you're going to set out to kill someone, then use a
- better weapon with more killing power and range."
- Over the next few weeks, Sherry learned how to shoot
- competently with almost every conceivable handgun. The training
- took place on a firing range that was a mock-town with pop-up or
- swinging targets. She had to learn to shoot with one hand, the
- wrong hand, and both hands. Keith taught her how to draw from
- waist, shoulder, and leg holsters. For one phase of the schooling,
- she had to wear a suit, heels, and draw from a purse. It sure felt
- strange to Sherry to walk though the training range in a navy
- pinstripe "dress for success" suit, career pumps, and whip oet a
- .380 automatic to drill a scumbag.
- Combat training was held using guns firing paintballs. These
- were often painful as the paint pellets were fired from regular
- firearms (rather than the paintball guns), but the training impact
- of being shot was of value.
- The flying continues as before. Sherry passed her multi-
- engine flight test. She was put on the roster for the air-charter
- outfit based at the airport; soon she was flying the Twin Beech and
- the Navajo on cargo runs. To her amusement, she even flew some men
- to the same southern airport where she had been taken for her
- medical examination. When the schedule called for her to make a
- night run, her other training was adjusted to accomodate the
- flight. She was building time in the classic method used by
- aspiring commercial pilots.
- The therapy continued, too. Janet acted more like a close
- confidant than a professional, which resulted in Sherry's opening
- up completely. Janet also reviewed the surveillance reports on
- Sherry for any discrepancies. She was coming along fine.
- Sherry had continuing appointments with the electrolysis team,
- normally once a week. They went after follicles that were dormant
- during the initial process along with the ones that had survived.
- The sessions didn't take very long, but they were nothing that she
- regarded as fun.
- The ground training shifted focus somewhat. The curriculum
- moved from handguns to shoulder weapons: rifles and shotguns.
- Sherry found she had a talent with a rifle, she could "dope" the
- wind and normally hit a target at six hundred yards. The shotgun
- was easy for her, it was a reactive weapon where the rifle was
- normally a deliberate one. Sherry really didn't like the high-
- powered rifles too much, they kicked fiercely. But anything
- smaller than a .30-06 was fun.
- As firearms training tapered off, they started her on unarmed
- training. This had little in common with the theology of martial
- arts, it was raw street survival training. A few sessions were
- held with Sherry wearing "street clothes," dresses, skirts, heels.
- Those sessions often resulted in the clothes being totalled, but
- they were replaceable.
- One session was nighttime training. Sherry had to walk down
- the street. Most of the people would pass her by, but one was
- supposed to attack. When the attack came, Sherry spun out of the
- attacker's grip and pulled a snub-nosed .38 from under her jacket.
- She levelled the pistol at the attacker and fired three times, the
- instructor staggered back in shock as three paint pellets smashed
- into his chest. The lights came on as the two looked at each
- other, the other people on the street had all dived for cover when
- the shots rang out. The trainer rubbed the impact sites and said:
- "Very good. If you have a weapon, the hand-to-hand moves are for
- fools. But that's not the goal of this training, so don't bring
- it again." His voice sounded harsh, but he was trying hard not to
- smile.
- Sherry had a medical appoinment the next day. Dr Trotti and
- one of his parters, Dr. Pamela Levinson, gave her another complete
- physical. It lasted most of the day, Sherry just put up with the
- routine. She hated being poked and prodded, but that was the way
- the medical profession worked.
- The two doctors saw her after the exam. "How are you doing,
- my dear," Trotti asked.
- "Fine."
- "Any complaints?"
- "No."
- "Are you noticing any soreness around your nipples," asked
- Levinson.
- "Some," admitted Sherry. "The literature the pharmacy gave
- me said to expect that."
- Both doctors nodded, then Trotti shifted gears. "I want you
- to go to the blood bank and have them extract a pint of blood, then
- another one in four weeks. That will provide a ready source in
- case we need it."
- "For what?"
- "Surgery," he said. "In two months, we're going to take you
- in and reshape your face to a more feminine appearance. At the
- same time, the day before actually, Dr. Levinson will do the vocal
- surgery. You'll be out of action for a while after that, but we'll
- make sure you're still learning something."
- Sherry nodded, not wanting to speak. Her mind was filled with
- a conflict; she wanted to have the facial surgery, but she also
- didn't want anybody cutting her with a sharp object. The doctors
- asked some other questions, but Sherry answered them rather
- abruptly. When the interview ended, she went to the blood bank and
- they drew a pint for deposit on her account. They told her to
- drink plenty of fluids and not to fly for 24 hours. She called
- the field and had them take her off the schedule.
- Janet had noticed Sherry's hesitancy at the pre-surgery
- meeting, she dropped by after work with a bottle of white wine and
- some munchies. Sherry was a little amazed and a little peeved that
- Janet hadn't called; the townhouse looked like an exercise in
- "Living With Chaos." But she found a couple of semi-clean glasses
- and a plate for the food. After the bottle was opened, Sherry
- opened the discussion: "I assume you didn't stop by just for a
- visit."
- "Why do you say that?"
- "Oh, I don't know," Sherry said with sarcasm dripping like
- molten steel. "You've never said anything like `let's do lunch,'
- but two hours after a discussion about surgery, here you are, booze
- in hand."
- "In some way's you're still a man," Janet said with a wry
- smile. "Most women wouldn't go that quickly to the heart of the
- matter. They'd have opened with some pleasantries and eventually
- worked around to the point."
- "Or they might try altering the subject. Answer the
- question."
- "All right," Janet sighed. "You seemed uncomfortable with the
- idea of surgery. What bothers you, the idea of changing your
- appearance?"
- "No," Sherry said emphatically. "Nothing like that. It's
- more like I don't like the idea of being operated on."
- "Have you ever had an operation?"
- "Nope, nothing more serious than removing wisdom teeth. I've
- never been knocked out, not even accidentally."
- "And the idea bothers you?"
- "People sometimes don't wake up afterwards."
- Janet smiled. At least it wasn't a matter of Sherry not being
- convinced that the operation wasn't necessary. She spent a lot of
- time trying to calm Sherry's jitters.
- She wasn't too convinced, but she was reassured that there
- were other things in life more risky that she had done. Then
- Sherry asked a question Janet wasn't prepared for: "When are you
- going to remove my testicles?"
- "Why?"
- "I did some reading on hormones in the database. The writers
- all seem to believe that female hormones work better if they're not
- fighting male hormones. You could also lower the dosage level and
- reduce the risks from side effects."
- Janet looked very serious. "But if that's done, you'd never
- be able to father a child. And there is no way to reverse that
- operation, even superglue wouldn't work."
- Sherry stood up and stripped to the waist. "Do I look like
- a man? I am a woman-" she said that with considerable emphasis "-
- but I still have some extra parts. I want that taken care of as
- soon as I can."
- Janet motioned to Sherry to put her clothes back on; Sherry
- complied. Sherry's breasts were starting to bud, her body looked
- like one that might belong to a six-foot tall twelve year old. "We
- can't do all that, not right away."
- "Why not?"
- "You know about the Harry Benjamin Standards of Care?" Sherry
- nodded. "Well," Janet continued, "we are really violating them
- somewhat in your case. There is an overriding interest that
- classifies as `national security,' we've compressed a lot of the
- time factors. But we still won't do the final reassignment surgery
- without some form of Real Life Test.
- "You are going to have to live and work as a woman for a while
- before we consider you for final surgery. When it comes time, we
- will have you operated on by the best there is."
- "You mean-" Sherry held her tongue when Janet held her finger
- to her lips.
- "I think we know who that is. There are people who help out
- the Government on a volunteer basis, but under the strictest
- security. You won't meet the surgeon, at least not when you're
- concious. But we have to satisfy a minimum of the Standards before
- you can undergo SRS."
- "Hmm. And I don't suppose you have any specifics in mind for
- a Real Life Test?"
- "As a matter of fact, yes. You'll get a job with an air cargo
- service, flying night runs for a check-delivery service. That'll
- also build your logbook up. It's really a double-barreled test:
- we'll see if you can survive on your own as a woman and if you can
- be a competent professional pilot."
- Sherry nodded. By this time the wine was gone and they both
- were feeling tired. Janet made her exit, Sherry washed up and went
- to bed.
- Doris called Sherry at 5am and told her to be ready for flying
- at six and to bring changes of clothing for three days. Sherry
- grunted something unintelligible into the phone and got up. She
- went over to the field at six; to her surprise she was handed a
- completed flight plan to Mojave, California and the keys to the
- Twin Beech. Go with the flow, she figured, she was airborne by
- 6:30.
- The plan had her overnighting in Cheyenne, then on to
- California. The FBO at the Cheyenne airport gave her a ride to a
- local Holiday Inn. Sherry had dinner in the restaurant and wnet
- to bed. She grabbed a cab to the airport the next morning and
- completed the trip to Mojave.
- Of all the possibilities that she anticipated, what happened
- didn't occur to her. She was met at the airport and immediately
- loaded onto a Marine C-12 en route to the Twenty-Nine Palms Marine
- base. Four instructors met her for a course in desert survival.
- Over the next seven days, they showed her how to survive in the
- desert with the materials and equipment she'd likely have if she
- had to crash-land in one. Water was the key, they emphasised.
- without water, you die. With water, then one might survive.
- The detail that convinced her that someone was really
- planning her training ahead was that the instructors had a week's
- supply of her hormone pills.
- Sherry really enjoyed the hot shower she took after the week
- was over. But they didn't keep her at 29 Palms; she was flown to
- San Diego and put onto a C-141 to Panama. Once there, she got to
- repeat the whole process in a jungle. The struggle there was
- almost the opposite; too much water and trying to keep dry. There
- were more poisonous snakes in the jungle than she ever dreamed of,
- and bugs galore. Sherry wasn't too sure which she hated more, bugs
- or snakes.
- Week three found her in Colorado, this time the focus was on
- mountain survival. By this time Sherry was wondering if she'd
- survive survival training. The survival trainig was followed up
- by a cram course in land navigation; the final exam was a three-
- day trek to a pickup point. They made it clear to her that they
- would only look for her at the pickup point, she had to get there
- or reach civilization on her own. She made it to the pickup point
- with three hours to spare.
- After she showered and changed into a fresh set of clothes,
- one of the instructors took her to a restaurant for a graduation
- dinner. Sherry had no trouble finishing a 16-oz prime rib, the
- largest steak she had eated in years. It was about the best she
- ever remembered, too. The night was memorable if only for the fact
- that it was the first time since she passed through Cheyenne that
- she slept indoors in a bed with clean sheets.
- Sherry caught a commercial flight to Madison, Wisconsin the
- next day. Craig met her at the airport, the two flew back to the
- home base in the Bonanza. The Twin Beech was on the field when
- they arrived. She had no idea who retrieved it, but she knew
- better than to ask.
- Doris had left a note on her door; Sherry was glad to learn
- she had the next two days off. She slept for most of it. When
- she stepped on the bathroom scale, she was shocked to learn that
- she had lost 25 pounds during the rigouroes training. None of her
- new wardrobe fit, she wore sweats and pulled the drawstring tight.
- It would probably be a temporary loss.
-
- --