Personal Computer World 1995 June

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1 What is Mr Lamb's Christian name? Andrew Thomas Lawrence Sidney 3 2 What was the name of the man Lamb disliked? Quinn Simmonds Smith Jones 2 3 What did Lamb study in his paper? New bond Issues Currency Rates Share Prices Sexual Irregularities 1 4 How does one dispose of red ants? Peppermint Sugar Mint Beer 1 5 What sort of teacher had sex irregularities? French Geography History Music 4 6 What sort of animal did Lamb consider? Dog Sheep Cow Lamb 3 7 What riveted Lamb's attention? A bust A pretty house A pretty girl An ear 4 8 What sort of aloofness did Lamb go in for? Godlike Jovian Snooty Rude 2 9 What sort of mood was Lamb in? Happy Sad Philandering Misanthropic 4 10 What type of area was ripe for development? A wooded hillside A bare hillside A water meadow A pretty dale 1 +++ Chapter 2 test 1 How would you describe the ear? Pointed Large Flappy Perky 4 2 What colour was the hair that went with the ear? Brown Black Blond Green 2 3 What did Lamb do with the ear? Lick it Wash his hands of it Make a meal of it Ponder its subtilties 2 4 What would he have liked to do to the ear? Chop it off Make a sketch of it Bite it Kiss it 3 5 How would you describe Lamb's face? Round Square Macho Long 4 6 How would you describe his body? Short Fat Long Gaunt 3 7 How would you describe his expression? Happy Open Brooding Saturnine 4 8 How did his wife consider herself? Clever Artistic Homely Loving 2 9 How did Lamb like to sit? Knees up Upright Slouched Legs crossed 1 10 What sort of advice did he give his clients? Helpful Financial Marital Sexual 2 +++ chapter 3 test 1 What has the ear also got? Hairs Freckles Legs Eyes 3 2 What is Lamb's daughter's name? Here Hebe Hora Henrietta 2 3 What did the youth look like? Swarthy Well-built Fat Lithe 4 4 Who followed Lamb's progress? The butcher The newspaperman The paperboy The tramp 2 5 What tone of voice did his daughter use? Censorious Angry Sensual Bored 1 6 What does she call her father? Daddy Sir Major King 3 7 What does she think he needs? A stiff drink A hot water bottle A good woman A dose of aspirin 2 8 How does she describe his walk? As an unpromising meander A senseless drift A drunken wander An agonized shuffle 4 9 What is Lamb's wife's Christian name? Sally Mary Molly Sandra 2 10 What is her nickname? Mumps Helga Sapho Hannah 3 +++chapter 4 test 1 What was the little russet man carrying? A book An umbrella A sun shade A pair of spectacles 2 2 Who had the little russet man met? Darwin Van Gogh Rabelais Queen Victoria 3 3 What is Sandra's surname? Smart Wagott Handley Rush 4 4 What is Sandra's job? Clothing model Artist's model Sales Assistant Bank Clerk 1 5 Was the Lamb home... A terrace A pied-a-terre An apartment A mansion 4 6 What was the boundary that split the town? A river A road A railway A wall 3 7 Did Mrs Lamb like... Old houses New houses Small houses Bungalows 2 8 How does one get into a car? Hop in Crawl in Stumble in Mount 4 9 How does the russet man taste things? Through his feet Through his Wellington boots With his long tongue With his protozoan adenoids 1 10 Who drove the car? Mr Lamb The little russet man Miss Lamb Mrs Lamb 3 +++Chapter 5 1 What role did Mrs Lamb play? Helen of Troy Cupid Psyche Juliette 3 2 What was Mr Gray's Christian name? Matthew Lawrence Leonard Leopold 3 3 What role did Mr Gray play? Cupid Psyche Romeo Paris 1 4 What was Tilly wearing? Breaches Underpants Pyjamas A kilt 3 5 What was the name of the acting circle? The Malborough Players The Woodbine Players The John Players The Carlton Players 2 6 What was Mrs Lamb's brother's name? Bottom Blumby Thomas Bryant 2 7 What does Sandra notice outside the train? Two ponds Two old oak trees Two turtle doves Two beautiful mansions 1 8 What does she notice is missing? Some ducks The herd of cows The beehives The swans 4 9 Where does Sandra work? On First Avenue On Third Avenue On Fifth Avenue On Seventh Avenue 3 10 What sort of dressing-gown does Hebe wear? A flaming one A cheerful one A multicoloured one A revealing one 1 +++Chapter 6 1 What does Mrs Lamb think the horse might eat? Porridge oats Quaker Oats Kellogg's All-Bran Oat cakes 2 2 Where was Dug when Lamb scared him? In the shower In bed In Mrs Lamb's room In the lounge 1 3 What had Lamb be following in the paper? A sex scandal A divorce case A custody case A murder case 4 4 Where did Hebe pat Lamb? On the head On the back On his rump On his nose 3 5 Who stole Lamb's paper? Mrs Lamb The maid Dug Hebe 2 6 What road did he take to get to the next paper? The Old Road The Old Hill Road The Round Hill Road The High Hill Road 4 7 Whose paper did he read? The Smiths' The Browns' The Walkers' The Greens' 3 8 What sort of chair did reader's wife sit on? An armchair A wicker chair A kitchen stool A stylish couch 2 9 What did Lamb use to turn the page? His red tongue His front right hoof His front left hoof His muzzle 1 10 What club did the newspaper reader frequent? A football club A baseball club A cricket club A golf club 4 +++Chapter 7 1 Into what road did the maddened horse escape? Brighton Road Fairfield Avenue James Close Masons Avenue 2 2 At what time of day did the chase take place? In the morning At lunchtime In the afternoon In the evening 1 3 What month were they in? June July August September 2 4 What sort of animal does Hebe say her father is? A strong lion An attenuated giraffe A wise owl An odd duck 4 5 What book was Sandra reading? Mein Kampf The Story of O Green Mansions A Midsummer Night's Dream 3 6 Where did the horse first show himself that evening? At the parlour window At the dining-room window At the kitchen window At the bathroom window 2 7 Where did Mr Gray hide? Behind a sofa Under a bed Under a piano Under his covers 3 8 What did Lamb perform on the stage? A tap dance A short play A clog dance Acrobatics 3 9 How would you describe Lamb's cocktail? Monolithic Miniature Weak Strong 1 10 Where did the cigarette hit Lamb? On his back On his rump On his nose On his tail 3 +++Chapter 8 1 What was the name of the man who got caught in the rope? Billy Briggs Robert Bates Graham Madgwick Zorba the Greek 2 2 How old was this stout man? About twenty About thirty About fifty About ninety 4 3 To what did the trooper tie the rope? His own waist A telegraph pole His aunt's large dog A pylon 2 4 What drink did Lamb take to? Corn Whisky Beer Dark rum Vodka 1 5 Who did Mr Burnham sell the horse to? A fair owner An undertaker A taxi firm A fancy truck farmer 4 6 Who was already in Lamb's bed? Mr Burnham Mr Gray Sapho Sandra Rush 2 7 What fruit was Lamb trying to pick? Blackberries Strawberries Blueberries Gooseberries 1 8 What did Sandy do to Lamb? Stroke him Groom him Kiss him Scratch him 3 9 Who was shepherding the children? A vicar Their aunt Their mother Their older sister 4 10 What did the horse use as a pillow? Some straw A bucket A mare A trough 2 +++chapter 9 1 What was Gray stroking when he awoke? His hair Lamb's hair Lamb's whiskers Lamb's arm 3 2 What did Lamb take from the wall? A rifle A saber A dagger An evil blade 2 3 What does Lamb admire in Gray? His shoes His machismo His cowardliness His ties 4 4 Where did Lamb say his business meeting was? In New York In Los Angeles In Philadelphia In Las Vegas 3 5 What does Mr Long think is the solution to their problems? Ruination of Hebe Bootlegging Ruination of Sandra Joining a monastery 1 6 What solution would Hebe prefer? Ruination of Hebe Ruination of Sandra Bootlegging Ruination of Lady Godiva 1 7 What euphemism does Hebe use for pregnancy? In the club Up the spout Enceinte With Child 4 8 What does Gray give Lamb? A box of candies A package of ties A bunch of fives A ream of paper. 2 9 What does Lamb call Gray? Dear Leonard Len A spineless creep Lenny-baby 2 10 What does Gray do wrong when dressing? Gets his shoes mixed up Mis-buttons his vest Puts his trousers on back-to-front. gets his tie crooked 2 +++chapter 10 1 What does Lamb have for breakfast? Puffed rice worms Sugar puffs Rice Crispies 1 2 Where does Lamb first see Sandra? In the train In her bedroom In her unmentionables Just leaving for the station 4 3 What dastardly deed did he do at the station? He pecked Simonds He pecked the lanky porter He knocked of Simonds' hat He knocked off Gray's hat 3 4 Where did Lamb hide on the train? In a hat Under a seat Behind a trunk In the toilets 3 5 What does the seagull chase in his garden? An old dog A cat Mrs Lamb An errant rabbit 2 6 Who was the most voluble about the horse? Mr Gray Mrs Lamb Sandra Rush Mr Simonds 4 7 What does Hebe suggest that Lamb might become? A giraffe A pig A walrus A zebra 1 8 Who is disgusted with Lamb on the train? A dour nun A sad banker The conductor A precocious child 3 9 What bits of Lamb does Sandra think of during the day? His eyes His sardonic smile His hairy legs His uncompromising stance 2 10 What does Mrs Lamb eat with abandon? A steak A large sausage A raw egg An omelette. 1 +++Chapter 11 1 What had Lamb tried to eat at sea? Some apple peel A banana skin A piece of grapefruit An orange 3 2 What was the first meal that Lamb tried? Chop suey Fish and chips Sausage and chips Chicken and chips 4 3 What did Lamb's think when he was evicted from the restaurant? ...I've been given the bum's rush ...I've been given the boot ...I've been thrown out on my ear ...I've been bounced 1 4 Who interrupted Lamb's next dinner? An old woman A bloated man A skinny rake An old tub 2 5 What fish was Lamb into? Herring Cod Skate Roe 1 6 What does the old seagull suggest? Going to raid a fishing boat Going to catch a red herring Going to eat fertilizer Going to pick juicies at the tip 3 7 What was Sandra doing when Lamb peeked? Getting undressed for bed Taking a bath Getting dressed for work Taking a shower 1 8 What did she call Lamb? A low-down rotter An evil-minded goat A horny old devil A low-down loafer 4 9 How would you describe the old seagull? Saintly Ribald Irascible Agranoyous 3 10 What sort of party did the publican talk about? A shindig A fancy dress party A knees up A blowout 4 +++Chapter 12 1 At what time did the liner arrive? 3pm 4pm 5pm 6pm 1 2 What did Lamb give the lady gull? A nice piece of bread A half-filled banana Half an orange A piece of stringy bacon 2 3 What room on the ship did Lamb visit first? The ballroom The Smoking-room The luncheon room The Captain's mess 2 4 What was on Lamb's desk? A copy of the Wall Street Journal A copy of the Gazetteer A stack of bills A pile of slit envelopes 4 5 Who disturbed him in his office? Marilyn Monroe His secretary Billings Miss Higgins 3 6 How did Hebe describe her father's clothes? A dashing ensemble A bit on the small side A trifle loud Tres chic 1 7 What was Billings' job? An accountant A bookkeeper A treasurer A trainee assistant 3 8 From what position did Lamb lambast the skipper? From a chair From a porthole From a bed From a cupboard 2 9 what did the distressed girl cry? Rape! Man overboard! Help! Toss me a line! 2 10 What drink lingered long? A Bloody Mary A Highland Fling A Highball A Harvey Wallbanger 3 +++Chapter 13 1 How does Madam describe the first outfit? Is it not sympa? Is it not fantastique? Is it not chic? Is it not incroyable? 3 2 What does Sandra call Lamb? Nasty old man Horrible old goat Horny old devil Dreadful old perv 1 3 What was the first bit of Lamb that the waiter saw? His legs His snout His tail His pouch 3 4 What does Sandra threaten to do to a lady in the fracas? Tear her hair out Strip her clean Knock her block off Give her a cauliflower ear 2 5 What does Long do in the fracas? Pummel the face of a perfect stranger Twist the arm of a stranger Twist the nose of a banker Bite the ear of a perfect stranger 4 6 Who drove the car? Lamb Long Sandra Hebe 2 7 What was the judge's name? Maclean Colgate Sensodyne Gibson 4 8 What crime does Sandra say she hasn't committed? Murder Arson Treason Rape 4 9 What did the policeman say the defendants had called them? A bunch of twats A bunch of big stiffs A gaggle of demented geese A bunch of thugs 2 10 What song did the kangaroo sing? Two little boys had two little toys Don't cry for me Argentina Me and My Shadow Onward Christian Soldiers 3 +++chapter 14 1 Who preferred to say 'kingaroo'? Officer Donovan Judge Gibson Sandra Rush Melville Long 1 2 What form of self-disguise does Lamb suggest? A false nose A peculiar wig A new beard A Guy Fawkes hat 3 3 What book does Lamb suggest writing? Animalism not Cannibalism My Family and other Animals How to be a wild animal Wild Animals I have been 4 4 How many fish were there in the aquarium? One Two Three Four 3 5 What bit of Gray might hang from Lamb's jaws? His corns His smelly feet His simian arms His mangled head 1 6 What does the turtle tell Lamb to do? Swim off Budge off Flip on Slither off 3 7 What was the first word that Lamb traced out? Sinner Bed-robber Coward Adulterer 4 8 What was Nora going to use to fish out Lamb? A dirty cup A coffee-strainer A tea-strainer A sugar bowl 2 9 What would have made a splendid sarcophagus? An empty sardine tin An old baked beans tin An old ham tin An empty coffee jar 1 10 What part of Mrs Lamb stopped Lamb's descent? Her ample bosom Her dressing-gown cord Her bulbous belly Her flapping hands 2 +++Chapter 15 1 What convention had Dug been to? The Directors of the Cub movement The Directors of the Scouts. The Directors of American Youth The Boys Brigade 3 2 Why doesn't Dug desert Lamb? Because he loves Sandra Because he needs some money Because his impoverished aunt has died Because he's too fat for flying 4 3 What does Thomas say that Lamb is fit for? Bicycle racing Slam dancing Sprinting The 3 minute mile 1 4 How did Sandra hold Lamb's hand? Against her cheek In her hands Against her breast On her belly 3 5 What did Thomas use for his toast? Brandy Whisky Cognac Rum 2 6 What meal did Lamb eat? Roast beef Chicken Pizza and chips Steak 2 7 What does Lamb call Thomas? An inveterate reprobate A depraved devil A fossilised lump of sin A warped old monster 3 8 Why does Sandy think that Lamb will be glad to see her? Because Sapho's decamped Because Hebe is out Because Lamb's alone Because Lamb is himself 1 9 What sort of depravity is Lamb suggesting? Wild and various Anything possible Any and all Anything in the Kama Sutra 3 10 Where did Thomas drink his toast? In the hall In the lounge In the study In the dining-room 4 +++Chapter 16 1 What colour were Lamb's ears? Brown Dirty brown Yellow Dirty white 3 2 How would you describe his tail? Long and spineless Short and stumpy Bloated like a sea slug Coiled like a dejected pig 1 3 What were the debating gents drinking? Scrumpy Old Boot Cider Applejack Monk's Finger 3 4 What did the unfaithful wife call her husband? An old poof A granny A nancy boy An old woman 4 5 What does everybody know she's got? Boobs Legs Arms Guts 2 6 What did the angry woman throw over Lamb? Hot milk Hot soup Hot water Hot stew 3 7 What sort of cigar did the old man smoke? A cheroot A breva A King Edward A Havanna 2 8 What should be done with the Reds? Shoot 'em Mow 'em down Hang 'em Jail 'em 1 9 Where were the good-looking couple arguing? In the lounge Over the breakfast table Over the dining-room table Over the office desk 2 10 How did the atheist describe the prophets? A gang of old con artists A gang of cunning crooks A gang of greedy shyster A gang of grafting old prophets 4 +++Chapter 17 1 What was the weather like when Lamb returned? Cold and wet Warm and sunny Windy Bright and fresh 4 2 How long did Lamb lead a dog's life? About a day About a week About a month About a year 2 3 How much did Lamb send to the kennel owner? One dollar Five dollars Ten dollars Twenty dollars 3 4 What did Lamb have for breakfast? Ham and eggs Spam and eggs Toast and eggs Steak and eggs 3 5 What does Hebe describe Gray as? A worm A dog A snake A pig 1 6 Which window does Lamb remind his servant to leave open? The bathroom The dining-room The lounge The library 4 7 What colour was Lamb's tail? Black and white Red and yellow Black and grey Rose and pink 3 8 What animal did Lamb sort out first? A cat A dog A squirrel A rabid mouse 1 9 Who rescued Lamb from the dogs? Thomas Sandra Hebe Long 2 10 What was Sandra's landlady's name? Mrs Bootshiner Mrs Cummings Mrs Deadfoot Mrs English 2 +++Chapter 18 1 Where was it first noticed that Lamb had become a lion? Outside a filling station Outside a courthouse Outside a police station Outside Long's residence 1 2 What was used to 'transform' Lamb into a dog? A dress A dressing-gown A raincoat An old sack 3 3 What did Hebe call her 'dog'? Bonzo Boo-Boo Woofer Fifi 4 4 With whom did Lamb sleep? Sandra Melville Hebe No-one 2 5 What was their room number? 23 46 69 92 2 6 How many steaks did Lamb consume? One Three Six Nine 3 7 What distinguished the first man that the lion met? He had horn-rimmed glasses He had a hunched-back He was a wizened old soul He was a nervous, twittery man. 1 8 Which bit of Lamb got wounded? His ear His nose His rump His tail 4 9 For what type of clients was the hotel intended? Honeymooners Families People seeking peace People seeking fun 3 10 Where was their hotel room? On the ground floor In the basement On an upper floor On the first floor 3 +++Chapter 19 1 What instrument did Sandra take to? A guitar A drum A xylophone A trombone 2 2 What had been used to bandage Lamb's tail? A sock A hanky A brassière A pair of unmentionables 3 3 What was Hebe's adopted name? 1 Lorna Doon 2 Lady Godiva 3 Queen Victoria 4 Mona Lisa 1 4 What did the judge ask Sandra to do? To tell all To turn over a new leaf To get it off her chest To make a clean breast of it 4 5 Where are the judge's chambers? In New York In Brookford In Cummington In Stratford 2 6 What was the judge about to do when he saw Lamb? To pass sentence To rap for order To call the next witness To adjourn the case 2 7 Who met them at the Lamb residence? Thomas Nora Mrs Lamb Dug 1 8 Who was Lamb's companion at the pool? An old turtle A large frog An old squirrel A well-scented skunk 3 9 How far was Brookford from the mountain? 1 mile 5 miles 20 miles 100 miles 2 10 Who wrote the note warning of capture? Sandra Long Hebe Lamb 3 +++Chapter 20 1 What was Lamb's counsel's name? Mr Garden Mr Flowers Mr Hedges Mr Rosenbaum 3 2 What was the name of Sapho's counsel? Mr Wilson Mr Heath Mr Major Mr Churchill 1 3 What sort of head was Lamb given? As per Eastenders A rooster's A dinosaur's A parrot's 2 4 What sort of tail was he given? An ox's A pig's A wolf's A lizard's 4 5 Who swooned on seeing Lamb? Mrs Lamb Hebe Sandra The judge 1 6 How did Hebe refer to Sandra in court? That painted whore That Rush woman That startling succubus That harlot 2 7 Sapho's real name was revealed, what was it? Sally Mary Anne Megaera 2 8 What piece of clothing did Lamb grab when Hebe took the stand? Her blouse Her dress Her skirt Her slacks 3 9 Of what crimes did Sapho accuse Lamb? Witchcraft & mental anguish Robbery & arson Rape and pillage Diverse and disgusting behaviour 1 10 Who testified that Lamb was a horse? Mr Bludgeon Mr Bumbey Mr Roberts Mr Rudd 4 +++Chapter 21 1 What sort of sound could Lamb make? A deep-throated roar A whimper A screech A strange whistling sound 4 2 What weapon was used against Lamb? A stick A stone An old bone A club 2 3 Where did Lamb wake up? On a marble slab On a wooden bench On a steel bench On a stone table 1 4 How many surgeons were there at the slab? One Two Three More than three 4 5 What did the russet man nearly forget? His hat His cigar His coat His umbrella 4 6 How long had Lamb been transmogrifying? One week about a month About three months About a year 3 7 Where did the simpleton live? In a village In a field In a forest In a cave 3 8 What sort of assault did madam say it was? An assault partial An assault complete An assault degueulasse An assault degoutant 1 9 What was the date that the horse appeared in Lamb's bed? The first The tenth The fourteenth The twenty-fourth 4 10 What had Mr Rudd noticed about the horse? It was drinking cider It was snoring It was smoking a cigar It was eating steak and chips 2 +++end of test