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RGEMS-93.APR
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2000-06-30
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The following are the "Rare Gems (sm)" selections for April 4 to 10,
1993. "Rare Gems" is a service mark (sm) of Rare Breed Noninc. and David
Alan Wright. Compilation copyright 1992 by same. All Wright's rights
reserved. These collections may be distributed freely as long as this
notice is retained. No passes accepted for this engagement. --:Dave
===
I can make ANY cat go "woof". All you need is some gasoline and a match!
--Russell W. Laughlin
That which does not kill me had better be able to run away damn fast.
--Unknown
Hatred is not a family value. --Unknown
He who laughs, lasts. --Unknown
Drive nail here [*] for new monitor. --Unknown
Coming up next: How do Americans spend all the time that modern
technology saves them? --Couch potato family's TV, Kirk Anderson cartoon
Politics: n. [Poly "many" + tics "blood-sucking parasites"] --Unknown
===
The following are the "Rare Gems (sm)" selections for April 11 to 17,
1993. "Rare Gems" is a service mark (sm) of Rare Breed Noninc. and David
Alan Wright. Compilation copyright 1992 by same. All Wright's rights
reserved. These collections may be distributed freely as long as this
notice is retained. No purchase necessary. --:Dave
===
I am Homer of Borg. Prepare to be... Ooooh, donuts... --Unknown
Earth: A magnet you can stick a refrigerator on. --Unknown
I thought I had a back-up, but she refused to type it in again.
--Unknown
Dad always thought laughter was the best medicine... Which I guess is
why several of us died of tuberculosis. --"Deep Thoughts" by Jack Handey
It's a fact: You can get blood from a stone. You just have to throw it
hard enough. --Kids in the Hall
You know you could stand a little brushing up in the area of culinary
arts if you find yourself using a smoke alarm as an oven timer.
--Jordan Montgomery
Ask not for whom the bell tolls. Let the machine get it. --Unknown
===
The following are the "Rare Gems (sm)" selections for April 18 to 24,
1993. "Rare Gems" is a service mark (sm) of Rare Breed Noninc. and David
Alan Wright. Compilation copyright 1992 by same. All Wright's rights
reserved. These collections may be distributed freely as long as this
notice is retained. Use only in well-ventilated area. --:Dave
===
OS/2 for PS/2 -- Half an operating system for half a computer. --Unknown
LISP is a recursive language -- first you curse, then you recurse.
--Unknown
My life is based on a true story. --Unknown
Isn't this a great hotel? The towels are so nice and fluffy -- the last
time I was here, I could hardly get my suitcase closed!
--Overheard by James Randi
Imagination is the one weapon in the war against reality. --Unknown
Reality is what refuses to go away when I stop believing in it.
--Unknown
You'll go to Heck if you don't believe in Gosh. --Unknown
===
The following are the "Rare Gems (sm)" selections for April 25 to May 1,
1993. "Rare Gems" is a service mark (sm) of Rare Breed Noninc. and David
Alan Wright. Compilation copyright 1992 by same. All Wright's rights
reserved. These collections may be distributed freely as long as this
notice is retained. Keep away from fire or flame. --:Dave
===
It is better to write for yourself and not have a public than to write
for the public and not have a self. --Unknown
Power corrupts -- isn't that what it's for? --Unknown
Hasty climbers have sudden falls. --Italian proverb
When a stupid man is doing something he is ashamed of, he always declares
that it is his duty. --George Bernard Shaw
Hello... Incontinence Hotline... Can you hold? --Unknown
Be not surprised if thou findest thyself in possession of unexpected
wealth. Allah will provide an unexpected use for it. --James J. Roche
There's always free cheese in a mousetrap. --Unknown