home
***
CD-ROM
|
disk
|
FTP
|
other
***
search
/
The World of Computer Software
/
World_Of_Computer_Software-02-386-Vol-2of3.iso
/
b
/
bi1992b.zip
/
BI1992B.SUP
next >
Wrap
Text File
|
1992-07-08
|
125KB
|
4,967 lines
/
/
/m1. Instructions
/s
/i
/d7/1992.101
/t
This is the supplemental illustration file that I have collected
during the second quarter of 1992 from the NewLife Christian Message
Network as host of the Bible Illustration Conference. It contains 353
illustrations, quotes, and jokes.
I am releasing this file into the public domain. Share it with your
friends who are looking for good sermon illustrations. All I ask in
return is that if you come across a good sermon illustration, joke, or
quote that you share it with me on either SBCNet in the Minister's
Corner, the NewLife Christian Message Network in the Bible Illustrator
Conference, or IXTHUS BBS. (Please send them in ASCII text.) I'll
take all the illustrations sent me and collect them into a file with
all of the format codes for uploading the illustrations into the Bible
Illustrator Program by Parson's Technology. Please try to cite the
source of the illustration if you know it.
The phone number for my BBS (IXTHUS) is 404-978-6417. It is a free BBS
but it may take me a while to upgrade you so you can post a message.
(Normally less than a week.) If you perfer you can send me a letter
(or a private E-Mail message on SBCNet) with your name, address, phone
number, and desired password. I will then register you so you can have
full access on your first call.
William Gordon
IXTHUS BBS
3335 Alcazar Drive
Lilburn, GA 30247
You may delete this card if you no longer need.
William Gordon,
CompuServe I.D. 70423,70
/
/
/mAbortion
/sArgument Against
/i1656
/d5/1992.101
/t
The following is reprinted with permission from Christian World
Report and Washington Newsletter:
Pro-life opponents of the abortifacient drug, RU-486, who
maintain the drug is too dangerous for women, have gained some
unexpected help from three feminist doctors:
Janice Raymond, a medical ethicist at the University of Mass. in
Amherst; Lynette Dumbel, a medical scientist from Australia; and
Renate Klein, an Australian women's studies lecturer. They
released a study condemning RU-486 as unreliable and unsafe.
Raymond told the press, "We felt what was being lost in the
political debate was how the drug affects women."
All three women are advocates of legalized abortion and made it
clear that their study should not be construed as an endorsement
of the pro-life position.
/
/
/mAnger
/sOf Man
/i3956
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"The worst-tempered people I've ever met were people who knew
they were wrong."
- Wilson Mizner
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 286.
/
/
/mAnimals
/s
/i150-189
/d5/1992.101
/tJoke
A woman called the Baptist minister and asked him if he would
preach a funeral for her dog who had died.
"I can't do that, ma'am," he said. "Why don't you try the
Methodist preacher?"
"All right," she said, "but can you give me some advice. How
much should I pay him -- three hundred dollars or four hundred
dollars?"
"Hold on," he said, "I didn't know your dog was a Baptist."
- Guy Wesley, Louisville, KY
- _The Preacher Joke Book_, edited by Loyal Jones, p. 33.
/
/
/mAnimals
/sLove For
/i150-189
/d5/1992.101
/tJoke
An aunt of mine was teaching Sunday School. She was telling
the youngsters about Daniel and the Lion's Den. She had a
picture of Daniel standing brave and confident with a group of
lions around him. One of the little eight-year-old girls started
to cry.
The teacher said, "Don't cry. The lions are not going to eat
Daniel."
The girl said, "That's not what I'm crying about. That little
lion over in the corner is not going to get any."
- Saunders Guerrant, Roanoke, VA
- _The Preacher Joke Book_, edited by Loyal Jones, p. 65.
/
/
/mAtheism
/s
/i1225
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"The body of an atheist is the coffin of a dead soul."
- Adapted by Bill Gordon from a quote by
Christian Nestell Bovee
/
/
/mAtheism
/sPractical
/i1225
/d6/1992.101
/tQuote
"For many people today the problem is not false religion, but
a total lack of any religious views at all. They may say, "Yes,
I believe in God," when a Gallup poll is taken -- but He has no
influence on their lives. They are what someone termed
"practical atheists" living life just as if God did not exist."
- Billy Graham, _Approaching Hoofbeats_, p. 106.
/
/
/mBaptism
/s
/i756-760
/d5/1992.101
/tJoke
A lad in a Baptist family got the notion that he was going to
become a preacher. So he would get up on a stump and preach to
the chickens or whatever came by. He decided one day that he
ought to practice the art of baptism. He looked around for
suitable objects for the ceremony. Their old dog had had pups
which had grown to a pretty good size. He rounded them up and
took them down to the creek and began dunking them under with the
appropriate words. He got down to the last one, which was the
least sociable. When he picked it up, it growled and bit him,
drawing some blood.
"Well," he said, "I'll just sprinkle you and let you go to
hell."
- _The Preacher Joke Book_, edited by Loyal Jones, p. 18.
/
/
/mBaptism
/s
/i756-760
/d5/1992.101
/tJoke
There was this sinner who would get religion every time they
had a revival meeting, and then he would backslide until the next
revival. After about six times at the baptizing hole, the
preacher put him under, raised him up, and said,
"You've been baptized so much that the fish know you by your
first name."
- Russell Hensley
- _The Preacher Joke Book_, edited by Loyal Jones, p. 31.
/
/
/mBaptism
/s
/i756-760
/d5/1992.101
/tJoke
We were fixing to have summer camp in out church, and we were
encouraging the kids to fill out cards. We had a questionnaire
on the card and had them scattered about the building. At the
end of the Church service, a lady responded during the invitation, she
came and sat down on the front bench. She picked a card, started to
filling it out. We have the cards for new members there. I went
over to talk to her, asked her how we could help her. She said,
"Well, I want to be baptized."
I said, "Well, just put that on the card there."
She said, "I have, but I don't understand this next question."
I looked at the card, and it said, "Can you swim?"
- Rev. George Goldtrap, Madison, TN
- _The Preacher Joke Book_, edited by Loyal Jones, p. 53.
/
/
/mBeauty
/sExamples of Physical
/i378
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"A beautiful lady is an accident of nature. A beautiful old
lady is a work of art."
- Louis Nizer
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 314.
/
/
/mBeauty
/sVanity of
/i379
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"Love built on beauty, soon as beauty, dies."
- John Donne
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 195.
/
/
/mBeauty
/sVanity of
/i379
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"Better an ugly face than an ugly mind."
- James Ellis
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 295.
/
/
/mBible
/sAbsolutely Trustworthy
/i430
/d5/1992.101
/tJoke
A preacher, ending his sermon, announced that he would preach
on Noah and his Ark on the following Sunday and gave the
scriptural reference for the congregation to read ahead of time.
A couple of mean boys noticed something interesting about the
placement of the story of the Flood in the Bible. They slipped
into the church and glued two pages of the pulpit Bible together.
On the next Sunday, the preacher got up to read his text.
"Noah took unto himself a wife." he began, "and she was" -- he
turned the page to continue -- "three hundred cubits long, fifty
wide and thirty high." He paused, scratched his head, turned the
page back and read it silently, turned the page. Then he looked
up at his congregation and said.
"I've been reading this old Bible for nigh on to fifty years,
but there are some things in it that are hard to believe."
- Loyal Jones
- _The Preacher Joke Book_, edited by Loyal Jones, p. 72.
/
/
/mBible
/sFurnishes a Light
/i419
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"God has given us His Word, the Bible. Do you want to know
God more deeply and intimately? Do you want to discover His will
for your life? Then read and study the Scriptures daily."
- Billy Graham, _Approaching Hoofbeats_, p. 42.
/
/
/mBible
/sIgnorance of, Perilous
/i432
/d5/1992.101
/tJoke
One time in Sunday School I was giving a little quiz, and I
said to a fellow, "Can you give me the geographical location of
Dan and Beersheba?"
He said, "You mean they are cities?"
I said, "They certainly are."
He replies, "Well, I thought they were husband and wife like
Sodom and Gomorrah."
- Rev. George Goldtrap, Madison, TN
- _The Preacher Joke Book_, edited by Loyal Jones, pp. 54-5.
/
/
/mBible
/sMisuse Of
/i428
/d5/1992.101
/tJoke
In North Carolina about seventy-five years ago, the women had
a habit of wearing their hair in topknots. This preacher
deplored the habit. As a consequence, he preached a rip-snorting
sermon one Sunday on the text "TopKnot Come Down." At the
conclusion of his sermon an irate woman, wearing a very
pronounced topknot, told the preacher that no such text could be
found in the Bible. The preacher thereupon opened the Scriptures
to the seventeenth verse of the twenty-fourth chapter of Matthew
and pointed to the words "Let him which is on the houseTOP NOT
COME DOWN to take anything out of the house."
- Sen. Sam. J. Ervin, Jr.; Morganton, NC
- _The Preacher Joke Book_, edited by Loyal Jones, p. 36.
/
/
/mBoasting
/s
/i1730-1731
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"Get someone else to blow your horn and the sound will carry
twice as far."
- Will Rodgers
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 235.
/
/
/mBroad-minded
/s
/i
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"Broad-minded is just another way of saying a fellow's too lazy
to form an opinion."
- Will Rogers
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 290.
/
/
/mCharacter
/sStudies
/i4289-4300
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"Men show their character in nothing more clearly than by what
they think laughable."
- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 189.
/
/
/mCharacter
/sStudies
/i4289-4300
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"When wealth is lost, nothing is lost; when health is lost,
something is lost; when character is lost, all is lost."
- German Motto
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 195.
/
/
/mCharacter
/sStudies
/i4289-4300
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"Each one sees what he carries in his heart."
- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 218.
/
/
/mCharacter
/sStudies
/i4289-4300
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"It has been my experience that folks who have no vices have
very few virtues."
- Abraham Lincoln
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 301.
/
/
/mCheerfulness
/s
/i668
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"Everything is funny as long as it is happening to somebody
else."
- Will Rogers
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 162.
/
/
/mChildren
/sAdoption of
/i1654
/d5/1992.101
/t2Th 1:10
When Jesus comes again those who have placed their faith in
him will be manifested as the sons of God, heirs of God's
kingdom, and rulers with Christ Jesus.
When Octavian was sixteen years of age he was designated by
Julius Caesar as his successor. At nineteen he was in
command of an army and was away from Rome. At the hands of
Brutus, Cassius, and other friends, Julius Caesar was
assassinated. Octavian had not received the public adoption
by Julius as his son and heir. Therefore, he had to fight
his way to sovereignty of the empire. The old Roman
practice of public adoption of one to become a successor and
heir illustrates what will some day take place for the sons
of God. They will be publicly declared God's heirs.
- Harold J. Ockenga, _The Church in God_ (Westwood, NJ:
Revell, 1956), pp. 256-57.
/
/
/mChrist
/sLordship of
/i715
/d5/1992.101
/t
It was not easy for the Romans to hold their empire together
because of the many different races, religions, and cultures that
it included. The Roman emperors eventually developed a simple
loyalty test for their subjects. "On certain feasts and holidays
row upon row of subjects lined up to walk past the area's Roman
magistrate, toss a pinch of incense into a fire in the golden
bowl at his feet and mutter, 'Caesar is Lord.'"
Most citizens of the Roman empire had no problems with this
test of loyalty. The early Christians, however, felt that Jesus
deserved all of their loyalty. They also believed that Jesus and
not Caesar was their Lord! So they refused to give to Caesar a
title that they believed belonged only to Christ! As a result
many Christians were persecuted and killed in the early Church.
- Billy Graham, _Approaching Hoofbeats_, pp. 32-33.
/
/
/mChrist
/sVirgin Birth Of
/i720
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
To a twentieth-century mind the notion of a virgin birth is
intrinsically and preposterously inconceivable. If a woman
claims -- such claims are made from time to time -- to have
become pregnant without sexual intercourse, no one believes her.
for centuries millions of people never doubted that Mary had
begotten Jesus without the participation of a husband or lover.
Nor was such belief limited to the simple and unlettered; the
most profound and most erudite minds, the greatest artists and
craftsmen, found no difficulty in accepting the Virgin Birth as
an incontestable fact...
Are we, then, to suppose that our forebears who believed
implicitly in the Virgin Birth were gullible fools, whereas we,
who would no more believe in such notions than we would that the
world is flat, have put aside childish things and become mature?
... It would be difficult to support such a proposition in the
light of the almost inconceivable credulity of today's brain-
washed public, who so readily believe absurdities in
advertisements and in statistical and sociological
prognostications before which an African witch-doctor would
recoil in derision.
- Malcolm Muggeridge, _Jesus: The Man Who Lives_, cited in
Michael Hostetler, _Illustrating The Sermon_, pp. 65-66.
/
/
/mChristian Life
/sHypocritical
/i3503-3511
/d6/1992.101
/tQuote
"The greatest need today is not more Christians but more true
Christians."
- Billy Graham, _The Secret Of Happiness_, p. 17.
/
/
/mChristianity
/sCharacteristics of
/i4139
/d5/1992.101
/t
Patrick Henry wrote in his will: "I have now disposed of all
my property to my family; there is one thing more I wish I could
give them, and that is the Christian religion. If they have
that, and I had not given them one shilling they would be rich;
and if they had not this, and I had given them all this world,
they would be poor."
- Cited in Knights Illustrations, p. 211.
/
/
/mChurch
/sDenominations
/i734
/d5/1992.101
/tJoke
A bunch of loafers were sitting around a country store
discussing the selection of a new pope, which was then in
process. One old fellow listened for a while and then said,
"Well, I think the Catholics have had it long enough. I hope a
Baptist gets it this time."
- Wilma Dykeman, Newport, TN
- _The Preacher Joke Book_, edited by Loyal Jones, p. 32.
/
/
/mChurch
/sFamily of God
/i739-741
/d5/1992.101
/t
Love - the visitors in church may not be able to explain it or
define it, but they know when it is there and when it is not. A
man will get up, dress, pass fifty other churches, and drive all
the way across town if he knows that a warm experience awaits him
with love and true fellowship in the house of God. For many, the
love they receive in church is the only love they will experience
all week long.
- John Bisagno
/
/
/mChurch
/sStrife in
/i734
/d5/1992.101
/t
Most of the problems and troubles that occur in churches do
not arise over doctrinal disputes but from little insignificant
things. Someone doesn't like someone else's way of dress, or the
way they comb their hair, or the way they talk, or their
educational level. What a tragic manifestation of our
sinfulness. Don't major on the minors, major on the majors!
- Unknown
/
/
/mChurch Finances
/s
/i2625-2636
/d5/1992.101
/tJoke
(This one gives new meaning to the term tight fisted.)
The strong man at the circus was demonstrating his strength by
taking a green stick and squeezing the sap out of it. When he
had squeezed out several drops, he asked if anyone from the
audience would like to try, and a frail-looking little lady came
forward, took the stick in both hands, and squeezed. To the
amazement of the strong man, a stream of sap ran down over her
knuckles.
"Who are you, anyhow, lady? he asked?
"Oh, I'm just the treasurer at the Baptist church, she
replied.
- Bob Sears, Somerset Kentucky
- _The Preacher Joke Book_, edited by Loyal Jones, p. 39.
/
/
/mCompliment
/sSincere
/i1019-1020
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"I can live for two months on a good compliment."
- Mark Twain
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 235.
/
/
/mConscience
/s
/i824-826
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"So far, about morals, I know only that what is moral is what
you feel good after and what is immoral is what you feel bad
after."
- Ernest Hemingway
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 210.
/
/
/mCreator
/s
/i884-886
/d6/1992.101
/tQuote
"The world is not here by chance, nor is human life a
biological accident. God brought it all into existence."
- Billy Graham, _Approaching Hoofbeats_, p. 135.
/
/
/mCross of Christ
/s
/i891-892
/d6/1992.101
/t
Rubel Shelly tells this story; Jason Tuskes was a 17-year-old high
school honor student. He was close to his mother, his
wheelchair-bound father, and his younger brother. Jason was an
expert swimmer who loved to scuba dive.
"He left home on a Tuesday morning to explore a spring and
underwater cave near his home in west-central Florida. His plan
was to be home in time to celebrate his mother's birthday by going
out to dinner with his family that nigh. Jason became lost in the
cave. Then in his panic, he apparently got wedged into a narrow
passageway. When he realized he was trapped, he shed his yellow
metal air tank and unsheathed his diver's knife. With the tank as
a tablet and the knife as pen, he wrote one last message to his
family: I LOVE YOU MOM, DAD, AND CHRISTIAN. Then he ran out of air
and drowned. A dying message - something communicated in the last
few seconds of life - is something we can't be indifferent toward.
God's final words to us are etched on a Roman corss. They are
blood red. They scream to be hear. They, too, say, "I love you.
/
/
/mCross of Christ
/s
/i891-892
/d6/1992.101
/tQuote
"On almost every church in the Western world there is a cross.
Why? Why has the cross become the symbol of Christianity? It is
because on the cross Christ shed his blood, which has become the
cure for sinners who will recognize their spiritual poverty and
receive Him as their savior, Master, and Lord."
- Billy Graham, _The Secret Of Happiness_, p. 30.
/
/
/mDeath
/sForetold
/i947
/d5/1992.101
/tJoke
One Sunday morning, I got up and was looking through the
paper, reading the death notices and lo and behold was my name.
I thought, "I wonder if the deacons have seen it?"
I got on the phone and called one of them and said, "Have you
read the morning paper yet?"
He said, "Yes, sir."
I said, "Did you see my name in the death notices?"
He said, "Yes, I did. (Silence) Preacher, where are you
calling from?"
- Rev. George Goldtrap, Madison, TN
- _The Preacher Joke Book_, edited by Loyal Jones, p. 54.
/
/
/mDeath
/sOf the Righteous
/i2160
/d6/1992.101
/t
When Dr. Donald Grey Barnhouse's first wife died from cancer
she was in her thirties. At the time of her death the oldest of
her three children was only twelve. Dr. Barnhouse had such
victory about his wife's death that he decided to preach the
funeral.
On the way to the service a large truck passed by their car
and cast it's large shadow over them. He asked his children,
"Would you rather be run over by that truck or its shadow?" His
twelve year old daughter replied, "By the shadow, of course! A
shadow can't hurt you." Dr. Barnhouse then turned to his
children and said, "Your mother has been overrun not by death,
but by the shadow of death." At her funeral service he preached
on Psalm 23: "Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow
of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me."
- Billy Graham, _Approaching Hoofbeats_, p. 204.
/
/
/mDeath
/sOf the Wicked
/i2161
/d6/1992.101
/tQuote
"You can commit suicide physically, but you can't "self-
destruct" your soul. You are going to live forever whether you
like it or not."
- Billy Graham, _Approaching Hoofbeats_, p. 188.
/
/
/mDeath
/sUniversal
/i2158
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"Death and taxes are inevitable."
- Thomas C. Haliburton
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 285.
/
/
/mDedication
/sPersonal
/i3508
/d5/1992.101
/t
Dr. B. H. Carroll, founder of Southwestern Baptist Theological
Seminary prayed the following prayer shortly after he was
converted.
Write thy name on my head
that I may think for thee;
Write thy name on my lips
that I may speak for thee;
Write thy name on my feet
that I may walk with and for thee;
Write thy name on my ears
that I may listen for thee;
Write thy name on my heart
that I may love thee;
Write thy name on my shoulders
that I may bear loads for thee;
Write thy name on my eyes
that I may see for thee;
Write thy name all over me
that I may be wholly thine -- always and everywhere.
- Robert G. Lee, _Sermonic Library_, pp. 150-51.
/
/
/mDesire
/s
/i980
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"Our necessities are few but our wants are endless."
- Josh Billings
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 215.
/
/
/mDivorce
/sAmong Christians
/i1666
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"Look at the condition of marriage within the context of
today's Christian homes and churches. The staggeringly high
divorce rate is almost the same among believers as among
unbelievers."
- Billy Graham, _Approaching Hoofbeats_, pp. 56-57.
/
/
/mEnd of the World
/s
/i1126
/d6/1992.101
/t
The current stockpiles of 60,000 hydrogen bombs is enough to
destroy the entire earth seventeen times over through nuclear
flames reaching 130 million degrees.
- Billy Graham, _Approaching Hoofbeats_, p. 123.
/
/
/mEnd of the World
/s
/i1126
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"Reporters, commentators, editors -- the men and women working
in modern media -- seem hypnotized by the notion of the end of
the world as we know it."
- Billy Graham, _Approaching Hoofbeats_, p. 29.
/
/
/mEnd of the World
/s
/i1126
/d6/1992.101
/tQuote
"We have grasped the mystery of the atom and rejected the
Sermon on the Mount. . . . The world has achieved brilliance
without conscience. Ours is a world of nuclear giants and
ethical infants."
- General Omar Bradley in an Armistice Day speech in 1948,
quoted by Billy Graham in _Approaching Hoofbeats_, p. 128.
/
/
/mEnd of the World
/s
/i1126
/d6/1992.101
/tQuote
"The late Albert Einstein predicted that in a full-scale
nuclear exchange at least a third of the population of the world
would die. This is the same proportion the Bible indicates: 'A
third of your people will die of the plague or perish by famine
inside you; a third will fall by the sword outside your walls.'
(Ezekiel 5:12)"
- Billy Graham, _Approaching Hoofbeats_, p. 129.
/
/
/mEnd of the World
/s
/i1126
/d6/1992.101
/tQuote
A scientist is reported to have said, "If the meek don't
inherit the earth, the cockroaches will."
- Billy Graham, _Approaching Hoofbeats_, p. 193.
/
/
/mEstrangement
/s
/i1272-1275
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"Every quarrel begins in nothing and ends in a struggle for
supremacy."
- Elbert Hubbard
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 247.
/
/
/mFaith
/sObstacles that Test
/i1213
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"The willingness to take risks is our grasp of faith."
- George E. Woodberry
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 263.
/
/
/mFalse Christs
/s
/i724
/d5/1992.101
/t
Billy Graham tells the following story of his encounters with
false Christ:
One afternoon in Paris, Ruth answered a knock on our hotel
room door. Two men stood there. One explained in broken
English that the other was "The messiah" who had come to see
me on a "divine errand." After that pathetic encounter with
another of the deranged people who have come my way,
claiming to be "the messiah," Ruth remarked, "He claimed to
be the Christ, but he couldn't even speak to us in our won
language." There is a vast menagerie of masquerading
messiahs in the world today--both men and women claiming to
be THE CHRIST. Some of them are mental or emotional
cripples. Others scheme and dream with ever more menacing
sophistication and power. But all are counterfeit.
- Billy Graham, _Approaching Hoofbeats_, p. 83.
/
/
/mFalse Religion
/s
/i2988-2998
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"Superstition is the religion of feeble minds."
- Edmund Burke
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 283.
/
/
/mFalsehood
/s
/i3702-3704
/d5/1992.101
/tJoke
A grandmother had taken her two grandchildren out for lunch
and boy did they misbehave! On the way home one of them, the 7
year old girl asked, "Grandmother, will you tell Mother how we
acted?"
The self-righteous grandmother answered, "No, but if she
should ask, I can't lie."
To which her little grandson said, "What do you mean you can't
lie? I'm only 5 years old, and I can lie great!"
- Michael Hostetler, _Illustrating The Sermon_, p. 80.
/
/
/mFalsehood
/s
/i3702-3704
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"You can best reward a liar by believing nothing of what he
says."
- Aristippus
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 198.
/
/
/mFalsehood
/s
/i3702-3704
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"One ought to have a good memory when he has told a lie."
- Corneille
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 198.
/
/
/mFalsehood
/s
/i3702-3704
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"Sin has many tools, but a lie is the handle that fits them
all."
- Oliver Wendell Homes
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 198.
/
/
/mFalsehood
/s
/i3702-3704
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
If you ever wondered how the Devil views lying you might want
to read the words of one of his best students: "Propaganda must
not serve the truth, especially insofar as it might bring out
something favorable for the opponent."
- Adolf Hilter
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 242.
/
/
/mFalsehood
/sWarnings against
/i3702
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"The liar's punishment is not in the least that he is not
believed, but that he cannot believe anyone."
- George Bernard Shaw
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 198.
/
/
/mFalsehood
/sWarnings against
/i3702
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"Wrong is but falsehood in practice."
- Walter S. Landor
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 319.
/
/
/mFanaticism
/s
/i1241
/d5/1992.101
/t
A fanatic sticks to his guns whether they are loaded or not.
- Unknown
/
/
/mFaultfinding
/s
/i662
/d5/1992.101
/t
No rewards are offered for finding faults.
- Unknown
/
/
/mFaultfinding
/s
/i662
/d5/1992.101
/t
When he was told in kindergarten that he had his shoes on the
wrong feet, Johnny tearfully answered, "But teacher, I haven't
got any other feet."
That just goes to demonstrate that it is not enough to just
tell people they have a problem. You need to explain its
solution also.
- Unknown
/
/
/mFear
/sOf God
/i3034-3036
/d5/1992.101
/t
Many people say they do not believe that fear is a legitimate
motive for coming to God. I disagree. I teach my children to
beware of rattlesnakes, lest they be bitten and die. This is
legitimate fear. In the city, children are taught to watch out
on the busy streets for cars lest they run out and get killed by
a passing car. This is legitimate fear.
- Billy Graham, Cited by Polin in _Why Billy Graham_,
p. 112.
/
/
/mFear
/sOf God
/i3034-3036
/d5/1992.101
/t
Although Robert Koch proved to the world that diseases are
transmitted by Microbes or germs invisible to the human eye, it
was the French Chemist Louis Pasteur who discovered how to use
weakened microbes to inoculate against all kinds of infectious
diseases.
His first successes were with anthrax and chicken cholera.
Next he searched for a serum of weakened hydrophobia microbes.
To do this he had to experiment with dogs driven mad by rabies.
In his lab Pasteur would stick his beard within inches of the
dogs fangs so he could collect froth into glass tubes. He
obtained this material at great risk to his life.
Finally he succeeded but he needed someone to try the serum
on. It was first tested on a nine-year old boy by the name of
Joseph Meister. His mother dragged little Joseph to Pasteur's
laboratory. There she begged him to save her whimpering little
boy who was trying to recover from the fourteen gashes inflected
by a mad dog. Pasteur gave the serum to Joseph on the night of
July 6, 1885. After fourteen treatments he was sent home where
he lived a normal life free from rabies.
One might wonder why Pasteur chose to work on finding a cure
for Rabies at such a great risk to his life when there were
several other diseases that he could have chosen instead. Some
believe that the answer may be discovered from an event in
Pasteur's childhood. He once said, " I have been haunted by the
cries of the victims of a mad wolf that came down the street of
our town when I was a little boy."
While fear paralyzes some into inaction it motivated Pasteur
to seek salvation for those attacked by rabid animals. Oh that
sinners would allow their fear of death to motivate them to seek
God's salvation!
- Adapted from Hasting's Illustrations, pp. 15-16.
/
/
/mFellowship
/sChristian
/i1265-1272
/d6/1992.101
/tQuote
"The televised worship service must never be a substitute for
being an active member and attending a local Christian
fellowship."
- Billy Graham, _Approaching Hoofbeats_, p. 116.
/
/
/mFlattery
/s
/i792-793
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
Flattery is usually a lie about you told in such a way that
you'd like to believe it."
- Unknown
/
/
/mFolly
/s
/i3852-3855
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"I think that there is only one quality worse than hardness of
heart, and that is softness of head."
- Theodore Roosevelt
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 247.
/
/
/mFolly
/s
/i3852-3855
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"A fool may ask more questions in an hour than a wise man can
answer in seven years."
- Unknown
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 248.
/
/
/mFolly
/s
/i3852-3855
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"A man always has two reasons for doing anything -- a good
reason and the real reason."
- J. P. Morgan
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 252.
/
/
/mForethought
/s
/i2918
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"The father back you can look, the father forward you are
likely to see."
- Winston Churchill
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 304.
/
/
/mForgiveness
/s
/i1314-1316
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"It is foolish to lay out money for the purchase of
repentance."
- Benjamin Franklin
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 255.
/
/
/mFreedom
/s
/i2134-2135
/d5/1992.101
/t
Freedom is indivisible -- it is for all or for none.
- Unknown
/
/
/mFreedom
/s
/i2134-2135
/d5/1992.101
/t
Too many people are clamoring for freedom to do what they
shouldn't do.
- Unknown
/
/
/mFreedom
/s
/i2134-2135
/d5/1992.101
/t
Freedom is not the ability to do what you want to do. Freedom
is the ability to do what you know you should do!
- Unknown
/
/
/mFreedom
/s
/i2134-2135
/d5/1992.101
/t
Freedom like health, is often appreciated only after we no
longer have it.
- Zig Ziglar
/
/
/mFreedom
/sBondage
/i2134-2135
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"Every tyrant who has lived has believed in freedom -- for
himself."
- Elbert Hubbard
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 294.
/
/
/mFreedom
/sLosing Of
/i2134-2135
/d5/1992.101
/t
The following article is reprinted with permission from Christian
World Report and USA Today...
Anti-Lookism Law
The Santa Cruz, California city council votes today on a proposed
ordinance prohibiting discrimination based on how someone looks.
The law would apply to employers and landlords, not to people
deciding whether to date someone. Among aspects of appearance
that would apply:
Height, weight, hairstyle and style of dress. Employers could
enforce cleanliness and grooming standards for "reasonable"
business purposes.
USA Today 01/14/91
/
/
/mGenerosity
/s
/i2126
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"Many men have been capable of doing a wise thing, more a
cunning thing, but very few a generous thing."
- Alexander Pope
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 269.
/
/
/mGiving
/sGenerous
/i2124
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"Joys divided are increased."
- Josiah Gilbert Holland
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 182.
/
/
/mGiving
/sGenerous
/i2124
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"We tire of pleasures we take, but never of those we give."
- John Petit-Senn
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 230.
/
/
/mGiving
/sSacrificial
/i4158
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"In this world it is not what we take up, but what we give up,
that makes us rich."
- Henry Ward Beecher
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 264.
/
/
/mGod
/sPower of
/i3808-3811
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"There are only two forces in the world, the sword and the
spirit. In the long run the sword will always be conquered by
the spirit."
- Napolean Bonaparte
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 280.
/
/
/mGod
/sSearch for
/i4100
/d6/1992.101
/tQuote
"Thou madest us for Thyself, and our heart is restless, until
it repose in Thee."
- Augustine, _The Confessions of Saint Augustine_, Book 1,
p. 1.)
/
/
/mGolden Rule
/s
/i1433
/d5/1992.101
/tMat 7:12
The happiest people are those who help others.
Is that true of the people you know? Psychologist Bernard
Rimland, at the Institute for Child Behavior Research in San
Diego, has just published a simple test.
Make a list of ten persons whom you know the best. After each
name write either H (for happy) or N (for unhappy). Then go down
the list again, this time writing S (for selfish) or U (for
unself) after each name. Rimland defines selfishness as "a
stable tendency to devote one's time and resources to one's own
interests and welfare -- and unwillingness to inconvenience
oneself for others." Once you have completed your list, draw a
table ..., count each category, and place the numbers in the
appropriate cell.
When Rimland added up the cases of 1,988 people rated by 216
students in six college classes, he found that the happy/selfish
cell was almost empty (only 78 of the cases), while 827 cases
fell into the happy/unselfish cell. Paradox: Selfish people are
be definition devoted to bringing themselves happiness. Judged
by others, however, they seem to succeed less often than people
who work at bringing happiness to others.
Conclusion: Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.
- Michael Hostetler, _Illustrating The Sermon_, pp. 66-67;
Source, Chris Cox, _Psychology Today_, December, 1982.
/
/
/mGood for Evil
/s
/i1436-1437
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"Always do right; this will gratify some people and astonish
the rest."
- Mark Twain
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 262.
/
/
/mGospel
/s
/i1440-1442
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"Perhaps you have never known the wonder of seeking Christ's
forgiveness for your sins or the joy of being forgiven..."
"You may ask, "What do I have to do?" First: Admit your need
("I am a sinner"). Second: Be willing to turn from your sins
(repent). Third: Believe that Jesus Christ died for you on the
cross and rose from the grave. Fourth: Though prayer, invite
Jesus Christ to come in and control your life (receive Him as
Savior and Lord)."
"You see, it's that simple! God loves you. Christ died for
you. You repent of your sin. You receive forgiveness. And you
discover the joy of that 'first love.'"
- Billy Graham, _Approaching Hoofbeats_, p. 49.
/
/
/mGossip
/s
/i3307
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"Scandal is what one half of the world takes pleasure
inventing, and the other half in believing."
- Paul Chatfield
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 265
/
/
/mGossip
/s
/i3307
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"There is so much good in the worst of us, and so much bad in
the best of us, that it hardly becomes any one of us to talk
about the rest of us."
- Unknown
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 265.
/
/
/mGossip
/s
/i3307
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"The objection of the scandalmonger is not that she tells of
racy doings, but that she pretends to be indignant about telling
them."
- H. L. Mencken
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 265.
/
/
/mGossip
/s
/i3307
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"Scandal dies sooner of itself, than we could kill it."
- Benjamin Rush
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 265.
/
/
/mGossip
/s
/i3307
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"Suspicions which may be unjust need not be stated."
- Abraham Lincoln
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 283.
/
/
/mGreed
/sSelf Defeating
/i2131-2133
/d4/1992.101
/t
A farmer had a cow who gave one pail of milk each day. The man
invited guests for a party. In order to save his milk for the
special occasion, he refrained from milking the cow for 10 days.
He expected that on the last day the cow would give 10 pails of
milk. When he went to milk the animal he found that she had dried
up and gave less milk than ever before.
- William R White STORIES FOR TELLING p64
/
/
/mHabit
/s
/i1473
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"Nothing so needs reforming as other people's habits."
- Mark Twain
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 253.
/
/
/mHabit
/sSmoking
/i1473
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"To cease smoking is the easiest thing I ever did; I ought to
know because I've done it a thousand times."
- Mark Twain
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 275.
/
/
/mHabit
/sSmoking
/i1473
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"Much smoking kills live men and cures dead swine."
- George D. Prentice
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 275.
/
/
/mHappiness
/s
/i1937-1938
/d6/1992.101
/tJoke
I once heard of a man who went to see a psychiatrist. He told
the doctor that he was lonely, despondent, and miserable. He
begged the doctor to help him. The psychiatrist suggested that
he needed to laugh so he instructed the patient to attend the
circus and watch the clown who was famous for being able to make
anyone laugh. His patient looked him in the eyes and said, "But
Doctor, you don't understand! You see I am that clown!"
- Billy Graham, _The Secret Of Happiness_, pp. 11-12.
/
/
/mHappiness
/sComes From The Lord
/i1937-1940
/d6/1992.101
/tQuote
"Many people turn to alcohol to try to drown the cryings and
longings of the soul. Some turn to a new sex experience. Others
attempt to quiet the longings of their souls in other ways. But
nothing but God ever completely satisfies, because the soul was
made for God, and without God it is restless and in secret
torment."
- Billy Graham, _The Secret Of Happiness_, p. 25.
/
/
/mHappiness
/sSecret Of
/i1937-1938
/d6/1992.101
/tPoem
Lord, grant that I may seek rather
To comfort than to be comforted,
To understand than to be understood,
To love than to be loved;
For it is by giving that one receives,
It is by forgiving that one is forgiven,
It is by dying that one awakens to eternal life.
- St. Francis of Assisi, cited by Billy Graham, _The Secret
Of Happiness_, p. 46.
/
/
/mHappiness
/sTrue
/i1937-1938
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"If you can be well without health, then you may be happy
without virtue."
- Edmund Burke
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 304.
/
/
/mHardness of Heart
/s
/i2716-2717
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"Most of our so-called reasoning consists in finding arguments
for going on believing as we already do."
- James Robinson
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 251.
/
/
/mHealing
/s
/i1538-1541
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"God heals and the doctor takes the fee."
- Benjamin Franklin
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 203.
/
/
/mHeart
/sEvil
/i1545
/d5/1992.101
/t
A teenage boy was arrested in New York for having committed
one of the most vicious murders of our time. His mother
exclaimed, "But he is a good boy!" She had not stopped to
realize that an unregenerate human heart is potentially capable
of any crime. That is the reason many of the peace treaties that
have been signed in human history have not been kept and war has
ensued. These treaties have been signed on the basis of trusting
the motives of the other party. They have been broken time after
time and millions have died on the battlefields of the world
because the human heart is deceitful and desperately wicked.
- Billy Graham, _The Secret Of Happiness_, p. 122.
/
/
/mHome
/s
/i1615-1672
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"Home is the place where, when you have to go there, they have
to take you in."
- Robert Frost
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 158.
/
/
/mHonesty
/s
/i566
/d5/1992.101
/t
The following letter was received at the Brooklyn Botanic
Garden from a child in the Bronx:
Dear Brooklyn Botanic Garden,
I took a quarter out of the wishing well. So I feel so bad
that I am returning your quarter back to you.
Thank you,
Chris
- _New York Times, June 17, 1987
/
/
/mHonesty
/s
/i566
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"I would give no thought of what the world might say of me, it
I could only transmit to posterity the reputation of an honest
man."
- Sam Houston
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 159.
/
/
/mHonor
/sGreat Men
/i1683
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"No person was ever honored for what he received. Honor has
been reward for what he gave."
- Calvin Coolidge
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 261.
/
/
/mhope
/s
/i
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"A misty morning does not signify a cloudy day."
- Unknown
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 160.
/
/
/mHope
/s
/i1691-1693
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"In all things it is better to hope than to despair."
- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 160.
/
/
/mHumility
/s
/i1714-1721
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"Humility is the first of all other virtues -- for other
people."
- Oliver Wendell Homes
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 161.
/
/
/mHumility
/s
/i1714-1721
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"It was pride that changed angels into devils; it is humility
that makes men as angels."
- St. Augustine
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 161.
/
/
/mHumility
/sBefore Men
/i1717
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"The humblest individual exerts some influence, either for good
or evil, upon others."
- Henry Ward Beecher
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 174.
/
/
/mHunger
/s
/i1732
/d6/1992.101
/t
According to the United Nations at least 100 million children
go to bed hungry each night!
- Billy Graham, _Approaching Hoofbeats_, p. 155.
/
/
/mHunger
/s
/i1732
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"No one can worship God or love his neighbor on an empty
stomach."
- Woodrow Wilson
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 163.
/
/
/mHusbands and Wives
/sDuty of Husbands
/i1626
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"An archaeologist is the best husband any woman can have: the
older she gets, the more interested he is in her."
- Agatha Christie
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 163.
/
/
/mHusbands and Wives
/sDuty of Husbands
/i1626
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"The most important thing a father can do for his children is
to love their mother."
- Theodore M. Hesburgh
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 223.
/
/
/mHypocrisy
/s
/i2994-2995
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"A bad man is worst when he pretends to be a saint."
- Francis Bacon
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 163.
/
/
/mHypocrisy
/s
/i2994-2995
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"Hypocrite: the man who murdered both his parents ... pleaded
for mercy on the grounds that he was an orphan."
- Abraham Lincoln
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 163.
/
/
/mHypocrisy
/s
/i2994-2995
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"Hypocrisy is the homage that vice pays to virtue."
- Francois de La Rochefoucauld
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 164.
/
/
/mHypocrisy
/s
/i2994-2995
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"It is difficult to get a man to understand something when his
salary depends upon his not understanding it."
- Upton Sinclair
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 295.
/
/
/mIdeals
/s
/i
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"Some men can live up to their loftiest ideals without ever
going higher than a basement."
- Theodore Roosevelt
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 165.
/
/
/mIdols
/sExamples Of
/i3931
/d6/1992.101
/tQuote
"We usually think of an idol as a religious figure carved out
of wood or stone, perhaps in some primitive tribe far removed
from civilization. But we have our "idols" today, because an
idol is anything that you worship in place of the living God.
Some people worship the idol of beauty or sexual pleasure. Some
people worship the idol of money and security... Some people
worship at the shrine of power."
- Billy Graham, _Approaching Hoofbeats_, pp. 106-07.
/
/
/mIdols
/sFalse Gods Worshipped
/i949
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"Whatever a man seeks, honors, or exalts more than God, this is
the god of his idolatry."
- William B. Ullathorne
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 166.
/
/
/mIgnorance
/sMan's
/i2036
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"Everybody is ignorant, only on different subjects."
- Will Rogers
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 166.
/
/
/mInjustice
/s
/i1981-1983
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"Sometimes silence is not golden -- just yellow."
- Unknown
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p.
/
/
/mInsanity
/s
/i
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"Insanity is hereditary: you can get it from your children."
- Sam Levenson
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 177.
/
/
/mInvitation
/sAppeal To The Lost
/i1787-1799
/d6/1992.101
/tQuote
"Seek Christ as Savior. Confess your sins right now where you
are. Don't wait another second. Invite Christ to enter your
life as Lord. Get a Bible and read as though your life depended
on it. It does -- your eternal life."
- Billy Graham, _Approaching Hoofbeats_, p. 108.
/
/
/mInvitation
/sAppeal To The Lost
/i1787-1799
/d6/1992.101
/tQuote
"You do not have to do some wonderful thing to be saved. All
you have to do is to accept the wonderful thing Christ has done
for you."
- Billy Graham, _Approaching Hoofbeats_, p. 206.
/
/
/mInvitation
/sAppeal To The Lost
/i1787-1799
/d6/1992.101
/tSinners Prayer
"O God, I am a sinner. I'm sorry for my sins. I'm willing to
turn from my sins. I receive Christ as Savior. I confess Him as
Lord. From this moment on I want to follow him and serve Him in
the fellowship of His church. In Christ's name. Amen."
- Billy Graham, _Approaching Hoofbeats_, p. 236.
/
/
/mJealousy
/sHuman
/i1851
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"In jealousy there is more of self-love than of love to
another."
- Francois de La Rochefoucauld
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 181.
/
/
/mJoy
/sEarthly
/i1940-1943
/d6/1992.101
/t
The poet Lord Byron dedicated himself early in life to the
pursuit of pleasure. At age twenty five only a year before he
died he wrote the following:
My days are in the yellow leaf;
The flowers and fruits of love are gone;
The worm, the canker, and the grief
Are mine alone.
Contrast the words of Lord Byron with those of Adam Clarke who
wrote many commentaries on the Bible. At eighty-four years of
age Clark declared:
I have passed through the springtime of my life.
I have withstood the heat of summer.
I have culled the fruits of the fall.
I am even now enduring the rigors of its winter,
But at no great distance I see the approach of a new eternal
springtime.
Hallelujah!
- Billy Graham, _Approaching Hoofbeats_, p. 205.
/
/
/mJoy
/sEarthly
/i1940-1943
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"A man isn't poor if he can still laugh."
- Raymond Hitchcock
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 162.
/
/
/mJoy
/sEarthly
/i1940-1943
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"Laughter is the sun that drives winter from the human face."
- Victor Hugo
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 189.
/
/
/mJudgment
/sOf God
/i1351
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"The national powers that we see hellbent for destruction --
amassing weapons, killing and being killed -- are not the
ultimate power. Nor are the individual figures who rule in our
lives the ultimate powers; mothers, fathers, teachers, pastors,
counselors, politicians, diplomats, bankers, police officers,
social workers, wardens and jailers, probation officers, tax
collectors, dictators and their soldiers, kings and presidents
will all one day stand powerless before this God of John's
vision."
- Billy Graham, _Approaching Hoofbeats_, p. 68.
/
/
/mJustice
/s
/i1975-1980
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"Rather suffer an injustice than commit one."
- Unknown
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 185.
/
/
/mKindness
/sCommanded
/i1998
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"You cannot do a kindness too soon, for you never know how soon
it will be too late."
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 185.
/
/
/mKindness
/sExamples of
/i1999
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"Kindness is a language the dumb can speak and the deaf can
hear and understand."
- Christian Nestell Bovee
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 185.
/
/
/mKindness
/sExamples of
/i1999
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"Those who bring sunshine to the lives of others cannot keep it
from themselves."
- James Matthew Barrie
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 189.
/
/
/mLife
/s
/i2146-2157
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"Let us so live that when we die even the undertaker will be
sorry."
- Mark Twain
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 193.
/
/
/mLove
/s
/i2200-2209
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"We are shaped and fashioned by what we love."
- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 196.
/
/
/mLove
/s
/i2200-2209
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote, 1CO 13
The love for equals is a human thing -- of friend for friend,
brother for brother. It is to love what is loving and lovely.
The world smiles.
The love for the less fortunate is a beautiful thing -- the
love for those who suffer, for those who are poor, the sick, the
failures, the unlovely. This is compassion, and it touches the
heart of the world.
The love for the more fortunate is a rare thing -- to love
those who succeed where we fail, to rejoice without envy with
those who rejoice, the love of the poor for the rich, of the
black man for the white man. The world is always bewildered by
it saints.
And then there is the love for the enemy -- love for the one
who does not love you but mocks, threatens, and inflicts pain.
The tortured's love for the torturer. This is God's love. It
conquers the world.
- Michael Hostetler, _Illustrating The Sermon_, p. 72; cited
from Frederick Buechner, _The Magnificent Defeat_.
/
/
/mLove
/sOf Christ for Men
/i2203
/d5/1992.101
/tRomans 15:7
When I first came to Portland, Oregon, I met a student on one
of the campuses where I worked. He was brilliant and looked like
he was always pondering the esoteric: his hair was always mussy,
and in the entire time I knew him, I never once saw him wear a
pair of shoes. Rain, sleet, or snow, Bill was always barefoot.
While he was attending college he had become a Christian. At
this time a well-dressed, middle-class church across the street
from the campus wanted to develop more of a ministry to the
students. They were not sure how to go about it, but they tried
to make them feel welcome. One day Bill decided to worship
there. He walked into this church wearing his blue jeans, tee
shirt and of course no shoes. People looked a bit uncomfortable,
but no one said anything. So Bill began walking down the aisle
looking for a seat. The church was crowed that Sunday, so as he
got down to the front pew and realized that there were no seats,
he just squatted on the carpet -- perfectly acceptable behavior
at a college fellowship, but perhaps unnerving for a church
congregation. The tension in the air became so thick one could
slice it.
Suddenly an elderly man began walking down the aisle toward
the boy. Was he going to scold Bill? My friends who saw him
approaching said they thought, "You can't blame him. He'd never
guess Bill is a Christian. And his world is too distant from
Bill's to understand. You can't blame him what he's going to
do."
As the man kept walking slowly down the aisle, the church
became utterly silent, all eyes were focused on him, you could
not hear anyone breathe. When the man reached Bill, with some
difficulty he lowered himself and sat down next to him on the
carpet. He and Bill worshipped together on the floor that
Sunday. I was told there was not a dry eye in the congregation.
- Rebecca Manley Pippert, _Out of the Salt Shaker_ (Downers
Grove, IL: InterVarsity Press, 1979), 177-78.
/
/
/mLove
/sOf God
/i2206
/d5/1992.101
/t
The great display of God's faithfulness is the Jews.
The great display of God's power is the resurrection.
And the great display of God's love is the cross.
- Stanley Toussaint
Feb, 20, 1977
/
/
/mLove
/sPreeminence of
/i2209
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"If there is anything better than to be loved it is loving."
- Unknown
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 195.
/
/
/mLove
/sPreeminence of
/i2209
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"The way to love anything is to realize that it may be lost."
- Gilbert K. Chesterton
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 195.
/
/
/mManners
/sBad
/i
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"It is a mistake that there is no bath that will cure people's
manners, drowning would help."
- Mark Twain
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 201./
/
/
/mMarriage
/s
/i1620-1621
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"The difficulty with marriage is that we fall in love with a
personality, but must live with a character."
- Peter DeVries
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 201.
/
/
/mMarriage
/s
/i1620-1621
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"Marriage is our last, best chance to grow up."
- Joseph Barth
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 201.
/
/
/mMarriage
/sSolemn Obligations of
/i1621
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"It takes two to make a marriage a success and only one to make
it a failure."
- Herbert Samuel
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 201.
/
/
/mMarriage
/sSolemn Obligations of
/i1621
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"A successful marriage is an edifice that must be rebuilt every
day."
- Andre Maurois
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 201.
/
/
/mMarriage
/sSolemn Obligations of
/i1621
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"God help the man who won't marry until he finds a perfect
woman, and God help him more if he finds her."
- Benjamin Tillett
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 202.
/
/
/mMartyrdom
/s
/i3487-3488
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"One with God, is always a majority, but many a martyr has been
burned at the stake while the votes were being counted."
- Thomas B. Reed
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 199.
/
/
/mMartyrdom
/s
/i3487-3488
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"It is more difficult, and it calls for higher energies of
soul, to live a martyr than to die one."
- Horace Mann
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 202.
/
/
/mMartyrdom
/s
/i3487-3488
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"A thing is not necessarily true because a man dies for it."
- Oscar Wilde
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 202.
/
/
/mMercy
/sSupplications for
/i2301
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"Teach me to feel another's woe,
To hide the fault I see:
That mercy I to others show,
That mercy show to me."
- Alexander Pope
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 204.
/
/
/mMinisters
/s
/i2083-2099
/d5/1992.101
/tJoke
The old lady went to church and heard a young minister preach.
When she got out, somebody asked her what she thought of his
preaching.
She said, "He spoke in true apostolic style. He took a text
and went everywhere preaching the gospel."
- Sen. Sam J. Ervin, Jr.
- _The Preacher Joke Book_, edited by Loyal Jones, p. 25.
/
/
/mMobs
/s
/i
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"A mob is a group of persons with heads but no brains."
- Thomas Fuller
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 207.
/
/
/mMocking
/s
/i2393-2394
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"Mockery is the weapon of those who have no other."
- Hubert Pierlot
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 261.
/
/
/mMocking
/s
/i2393-2394
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"Ridicule is the first and last argument of fools."
- Charles Simmons
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 261.
/
/
/mMocking
/s
/i2393-2394
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"Resort is had to ridicule only when reason is against us."
- Thomas Jefferson
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 261.
/
/
/mMocking
/s
/i2393-2394
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"Ridicule is the language of the devil."
- Thomas Carlyle
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 261.
/
/
/mMocking
/s
/i2393-2394
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"A sneer is the weapon of the weak."
- James Russell Lowell
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 264.
/
/
/mModeration
/s
/i2395
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"Moderation in temper is always a virtue; but moderation in
principle is always a vice."
- Thomas Paine
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 208.
/
/
/mMoney
/s
/i2396
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"He that is of the opinion money will do everything may well be
suspected of doing everything for money."
- Benjamin Franklin
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 209.
/
/
/mMoney
/s
/i2396
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"The use of money is all the advantage there is in having
money."
- Benjamin Franklin
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 311.
/
/
/mMoney
/sCannot Make One Happy
/i2131-2132
/d6/1992.101
/t
Billy Graham reports that one of the world's leading statesmen
once said to him, "I am an old man. Life has lost all meaning.
I am ready to take a fateful leap into the unknown. Young man,
can you give me a ray of hope?"
- Billy Graham, _The Secret Of Happiness_, p. 12.
/
/
/mMoney
/sCannot Make One Happy
/i2131-2132
/d6/1992.101
/t
While one world leader has claimed that if everyone had enough
to eat, money to spend, and security form the cradle to the
grave, that they would not ask for anything more. But Billy
Graham claims this is not true!
I know of too many rich people who are miserable. There are
people with everything that money can buy who are tormented,
confused, bewildered, and miserable! Yet how many times I
have heard people say, "If only I had a little security, I
could be happy." Or, "If only I could have a fine home, new
automobiles, and a winter cottage in Florida, I would be
content."
- Billy Graham, _The Secret Of Happiness_, pp. 20-21.
/
/
/mMoney
/sCannot Make One Happy
/i2131-2132
/d6/1992.101
/tQuote
Billy Graham reports that a Texas millionaire once confided,
"I thought money could buy happiness -- I have been miserably
disillusioned."
- Billy Graham, _The Secret Of Happiness_, p. 11.
/
/
/mMorality
/s
/i572-573
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"Turning the other check is a kind of moral jiu-jitsu."
- Gerald S. Lee
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 210.
/
/
/mMorality
/s
/i572-573
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"Reform must come from within, not from without. You cannot
legislate for virtue."
- James Cardinal Gibbons
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 253.
/
/
/mMorality
/s
/i572-573
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"To deny the freedom of the will is to make morality
impossible."
- James A. Froude
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 312.
/
/
/mMorality
/sMoral Atmosphere
/i572-573
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"Religion is the sole technique for the validating of values."
- Allen Tate
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 299.
/
/
/mMorality
/sRight And Wrong
/i572-573
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"To denounce moralizing out of hand is to pronounce a moral
judgment."
- H. L. Mencken
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 210.
/
/
/mMotherhood
/sCares of
/i4073
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"The hand that rocks the cradle is the hand that rules the
world."
- W. S. Ross
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 210.
/
/
/mMusic
/s
/i2454-2477
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"Music is the universal language of mankind."
- Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 211.
/
/
/mName
/sGood (Reputation)
/i2513
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"A good name, like good will, is got by many actions and lost
by one."
- Lord Jeffery
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 212.
/
/
/mName
/sGood (Reputation)
/i2513
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"A reputation once broken may possibly be repaired, but the
world will always keep their eyes on the spot where the crack
was."
- Joseph Hall
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 256.
/
/
/mName
/sNicknames
/i2513
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"Nicknames stick to people, and the more ridiculous are the
most adhesive."
- Thomas C. Haliburton
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 213.
/
/
/mNature
/sBeauty of
/i4074
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"The ignorant man marvels at the exceptional; the wise man
marvels at the common; the greatest wonder of all is the
regularity of nature."
- George Dana Boardman
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 214.
/
/
/mNature
/sBeauty of
/i4074
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"I love to think of nature as an unlimited broadcasting station
through which God speaks to us every hour, if we will tune in."
- George Washington Carver
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 214.
/
/
/mNeglect
/sOf Duty
/i1085
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"He that thinks he can afford to be negligent is not far from
being poor."
- Samuel Johnson
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 215.
/
/
/mOld Age
/s
/i2191-2195
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"There was no respect for youth when I was young, and now that
I am old, there is no respect for age -- I missed it coming and
going."
- J. B. Priestly
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 257.
/
/
/mOld Age
/s
/i2191-2195
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"The best time to start thinking about your retirement is
before the boss does."
- Unknown
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 259.
/
/
/mOld Age
/sFeebleness in
/i2193
/d5/1992.101
/tJoke
The new young pastor was calling on the elderly who could no
longer go to church. His first call was to Aunt Sally, who was
quite old and in a nursing home. He was somewhat nervous, and he
kept eating peanuts from a bowl beside her bed. When he go up to
leave, he noticed that he had eaten all of the peanuts.
"I'm sorry. I ate up all of your peanuts," he stammered.
"Oh, that's all right," Aunt Sally said. "I'd already gummed
all the chocolate off of them anyhow."
- Shirley Jones, Marrble, NC
- _The Preacher Joke Book_, edited by Loyal Jones, p. 70.
/
/
/mOppression
/s
/i2005-2006
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"The way of the world is, to praise dead saints, and persecute
living ones."
- Nathaniel Howe
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 202.
/
/
/mOppression
/s
/i2005-2006
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"I am the inferior of any man whose rights I trample under
foot."
- Robert Green Ingersoll
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 262.
/
/
/mOptimism
/sUnrealistic
/i1191
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"In these times you have to be an optimist to open your eyes in
the morning."
- Carl Sandburg
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 220.
/
/
/mOptimism
/sUnrealistic
/i1191
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"Optimist: a proponent of the doctrine that black is white."
- Ambrose Bierce
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 220.
/
/
/mPatience
/s
/i2691-2693
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"Patience is bitter, but its fruit is sweet."
- Jean Jacques Rousseau
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 225.
/
/
/mPeace
/sFalse
/i2699
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"Peace in international affairs, is a period of cheating
between two periods of fighting."
- Ambrose Bierce
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 226.
/
/
/mPerseverance
/s
/i3441
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"Consider the postage stamp... It secures success through its
ability to stick to one thing till it gets there."
- Josh Billings
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 227.
/
/
/mPerseverance
/s
/i3441
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"No rock is so hard but that a little wave may beat admission
in a thousand years."
- Alfred, Lord Tennyson
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 228.
/
/
/mPessimism
/sPessimist
/i1191
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"A pessimist is one who feels bad when he feels good for fear
he'll feel worse when he feels better."
- Unknown
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 228.
/
/
/mPessimism
/sPositive
/i1191
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
How to identify a positive pessimist. One who says, "Cheer
up, the worst is yet to come."
- Philander Johnson
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 228.
/
/
/mPleasure
/sWorldly
/i3200-3201
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"Pleasure's couch is virtue's grave."
- Augustine J. Duganne
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 230.
/
/
/mPleasure
/sWorldly
/i3200-3201
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"The body of a sensualist is the coffin of a dead soul."
- Christian Nestell Bovee
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 270.
/
/
/mPopularity
/sSought by Men
/i2789
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"Avoid popularity if you would have peace."
- Abraham Lincoln
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 232.
/
/
/mPopularity
/sSought by Men
/i2789
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"Popular opinion is the greatest lie in the world."
- Thomas Carlyle
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 232.
/
/
/mPrayer
/s
/i2816-2841
/d5/1992.101
/tJoke
This teacher went into her classroom about fifteen minutes
before the class was supposed to begin and caught a bunch of boys
in a huddle on their knees in the corner of the room. She
demanded of them what they were doing, and one of them hollered
back, "We are shooting craps."
She said, "That's all right. I was afraid you were praying."
- Sen. Sam J. Ervin, Jr.
- _The Preacher Joke Book_, edited by Loyal Jones,
pp. 25-26.
/
/
/mPrayer
/sCauses of Failure in
/i2820
/d6/1992.101
/t
According to Billy Graham 85 percent of the seminaries in the
United States have no classes on prayer.
- Billy Graham, _Approaching Hoofbeats_, p. 100.
/
/
/mPrayer
/sKneeling in
/i2830
/d6/1992.101
/t
In Touch and Live, George Vandeman wrote: "A young stranger to
the Alps was making his first climb, accompanied by two stalward
guides. It was a steep, hazardous ascent. but he felt secure with
one guide ahead and one following. For hours they climbed. And
now, breathless, they reached for those rocks protruding through
the snow above them - the summit. "The guide ahead wished to let
the stranger have the first glorious view of heaven and earth, and
moved aside to let him go first. Forgetting the gales that would
blow across those summit rocks, the young man leaped to hs feet.
But the chief guide dragged him down. "On your kness, sir!" he
shouted. "You are never safe here except on your knees."
The Christian life is a lot like climbing that mountain.
/
/
/mPrayer
/sPower of
/i4193
/d6/1992.101
/tQuote
"Happy is the man who has learned the secret of coming to God
daily in prayer. Fifteen minutes alone with God every morning
before you start the day can change circumstances and remove
mountains."
- Billy Graham, _The Secret Of Happiness_, p. 32.
/
/
/mPrayer
/sWorks
/i2820
/d6/1992.101
/tQuote
"So many times prayer without works is hypocrisy, and works
without prayer is futile and short-lived."
- Billy Graham, _Approaching Hoofbeats_, p. 168.
/
/
/mPreaching
/s
/i2087-2089
/d5/1992.101
/tJoke
A popular preacher got sick on a Sunday morning, and he called
a retired minister and asked if he would preach the service for
him. The substitute agreed but felt inadequate in filling in for
such a good preacher. When he entered the pulpit, he struggled
for a metaphor that would express his humility in his task.
"I feel inadequate in taking the place of your minister this
morning. He is such a good preacher and brings light just like
the sunlight through a clean pane of glass. I, on the other
hand, am like the piece of cardboard that you have seen
substituted for the pane in a window."
He went on and preached a pretty good sermon. At the door
afterwards, a good sister of the church gushed, "Preacher, you're
no cardboard; you a real pane."
- Loyal Jones
- _The Preacher Joke Book_, edited by Loyal Jones, p. 48.
/
/
/mPreaching
/s
/i2087-2089
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"Illustrations, like windows, let light into the mind."
- C. H. Spurgeon, _Flashes of Thought_ (London: Passmore &
Alabaster, 1874), p. 218.
/
/
/mPreaching
/sBad and Sorry
/i2087
/d5/1992.101
/tJoke
I was preaching in this church, and this boy would have
something negative to say eery Sunday, no matter what I preached
on. One Sunday he said, "That's about the sorriest sermon I ever
heard."
The next Sunday he came by and said, "Do you call that a
sermon?"
The third Sunday he said, "That is about the nearest nothing
sermon I think I ever heard."
I got so upset that I went to the deacons and said,
"Gentlemen, every Sunday this man has some negative comment to
make about my preaching."
One of them replied, "Oh don't pay any attention to hi,. He's
just a half-wit. All he can say is what he repeats from other
people."
- Rev. George Goldtrap, Madison, TN
- _The Preacher Joke Book_, edited by Loyal Jones, pp. 53-4.
/
/
/mPreaching
/sExamples of
/i2087
/d5/1992.101
/tJoke
"The city preacher worked hard on his sermon most of the week
and retyped it on Saturday night. But during the night his dog
chewed it all up. He didn't notice until it was time to go to
church. When he got in the pulpit, he said, "I had a nice sermon
prepared for you this morning, but my dog chewed it up. I'm
going to have to rely on the inspiration of the Lord today, but I
promise to do better next Sunday."
- _The Preacher Joke Book_, edited by Loyal Jones, p. 16.
/
/
/mPreaching
/sExamples of
/i2087
/d5/1992.101
/tJoke
A man got up in the middle of the pastor's sermon and walked
out. After church, his embarrassed wife sought to explain to the
preacher.
"I hope you don't think he disagreed with what you said. He
just has a tendency to walk in his sleep."
- Dr. Charles S. Webster
- _The Preacher Joke Book_, edited by Loyal Jones, p. 30.
/
/
/mPreaching
/sLong and Dull
/i2087-2089
/d5/1992.101
/tJoke
A preacher, known for long and boring sermons, had been into a
particularly tedious one for nearly an hour, when he stopped to
scold his congregation.
"I know you think my sermons are long, but I've got something
important to impart to you. Now, I don't mind you looking at
your watches while I'm preaching, but I want you to know that I
resent you shaking them to see if they're still running."
- Loyal Jones
- _The Preacher Joke Book_, edited by Loyal Jones, p. 50.
/
/
/mPreaching
/sLong and Dull
/i2087
/d5/1992.101
/tJoke
A little boy noticed a plaque in the back of the church and
asked the preacher what it was.
"Oh, those are the church members who died in the service," he
explained.
"Which," the boy asked, "the morning or the evening one?"
- Dr. Michael Nichols, Lexington, KY
- _The Preacher Joke Book_, edited by Loyal Jones, pp. 63-4.
/
/
/mPreaching
/sPulpit Committees
/i2087-2089
/d5/1992.101
/tJoke
A young preacher was invited into a church to preach a trial
sermon, with the understanding that he might be hired as pastor.
He liked the looks of the church, and he like the people.
Everything was fine at the beginning of the service, with hymns
and the prayer. As the young preacher mounted the pulpit,
however, and old man came in, followed by a huge Redbone hound.
He sat down on the front row, and his dog plopped down beside
him. The young preacher thought this was unusual, but he read
his text and launched his sermon, at which point the hound let
out a huge yawn with a yip at the end. This interrupted the
preacher, but he began again. The dog began to scratch a flea,
his leg whacking the floor with each lick, and the preacher
stopped again and asked if someone would take the dog outside.
Neither the old man not anyone else moved, so the preacher
started in again. The dog let out a growl and a deep bark,
disturbed at something he heard outside. Again the preacher
stopped and again asked if someone would take the dog outside.
When on one responded he got down from the pulpit, took the dog
by the collar, led him outside, and closed the door behind him.
Returning to the pulpit, he preached a pretty good sermon.
After the service he asked the deacon who was the head of the
pulpit committee how he had done.
"Well," the deacon said, "You preached a right good sermon. I
believe you're all right there, but you really shouldn't have
taken Old Man Johnson's dog out. I know the dog disturbed you,
but you know, Mr. Johnson is a faithful member of this church,
and he's on our pulpit committee. He always brings his dog to
church. He loves that dog, and we're used to it, and it don't
bother us to have him here. I think you ought to apologize to
Mr. Johnson for throwing his dog out like that. I believe you
better do that."
So the young preacher approached the old man outside and said,
"I sorry I put your dog out. The deacon here told me how much
you think of your dog and how you always bring him to church.
I'm real sorry that I did that, and I hope you'll accept my
apology."
"Oh, that's alright," the old man said. "I wouldn't have
wanted my dog to hear that sermon anyhow."
- Dr. Lee Morris
- _The Preacher Joke Book_, edited by Loyal Jones,
pp. 28-29.
/
/
/mPredestination
/s
/i2861
/d5/1992.101
/tJoke
A Free-Will Baptist and a Predestinarian Baptist became good
friends, and one took the other to a religious conference. As
they were going down a long set of stairs, the Predestinarian
stumbled and fell and rolled violently down the stairs, hitting
with a thud at the bottom.
His friend rushed down, helped him up, and asked, "Are you
badly hurt?"
"No," he said, checking himself all over, "I think I'm all
right."
The Free-Willer thought for a moment and then said, "I guess
you're glad to get that one behind you, aren't you?"
- Rev. George Goldtrap, Madison, TN
- _The Preacher Joke Book_, edited by Loyal Jones, p. 55.
/
/
/mPrejudice
/s
/i448
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"Prejudice is being down on something you're not up on."
- Unknown
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 236.
/
/
/mPrejudice
/sRacial
/i4083
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"At the heart of racism is the religious assertion that God
made a creative mistake when He brought some people into being."
- Friedrich Otto Hertz
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 250.
/
/
/mPride
/sExamples of
/i1723
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"A proud man is seldom a grateful man, for he never thinks he
gets as much as he deserves."
- Henry Ward Beecher
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 175.
/
/
/mPride
/sExamples of
/i1723
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"I know that a man who shows me his wealth is like a beggar who
shows me his poverty; they are both looking for alms from me, the
rich man for the alms of my envy, the poor man for the alms of my
guilt."
- Ben Hecht
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 221.
/
/
/mPride
/sExamples of
/i1723
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"An ostentatious man will rather relate a blunder or an
absurdity he has committed, than be debarred from talking of his
own dear person."
- Joseph Addison
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 221.
/
/
/mPride
/sExamples of
/i1723
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"Pride is the master sin of the devil, and the devil is the
father of lies."
- Edwin Hubbel Chapin
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 221.
/
/
/mProcrastination
/s
/i1500
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"In delay there is no plenty."
- William Shakespeare
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 239.
/
/
/mProcrastination
/s
/i1500
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"Procrastination is the art of keeping up with yesterday."
- Don Marquis
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 239.
/
/
/mProcrastination
/s
/i1500
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"Even if you're on the right track -- you'll get run over if
you just sit there."
- Arthur Godfrey
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 239.
/
/
/mProcrastination
/s
/i1500
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"Never leave that till tomorrow which you can do today."
- Benjamin Franklin
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 239.
/
/
/mProcrastination
/s
/i1500
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"Putting off an easy thing makes it hard, and putting off a
hard one makes it impossible."
- George H. Lorimer
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 240.
/
/
/mProfanity
/s
/i475
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"The foolish and wicked practice of profane cursing and
swearing is a vice so mean and low that every person of sense and
character detests and despises it."
- George Washington
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 240.
/
/
/mProfanity
/s
/i475
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"It chills my blood to hear the blest Supreme
Rudely appealed to on each trifling theme.
Maintain your rank, vulgarity despise.
To swear is neither brave, polite, nor wise."
- William Cowper
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 240.
/
/
/mPrudence
/s
/i2915
/d4/1992.101
/tTHE MILLER, HIS SON, AND THEIR DONKEY
"The simple believes everything, but the prudent looks
where he is going" (Proverbs 14:15). This fable is adapted from
Aesop's collection.
A miller and his son were traveling to market with their
donkey. They had not gone very far when they overheard three
women at a well. "Have you ever seen anything so strange? Two
men are walking when they could ride. Why do people have
donkeys?"
Responding to the women, the miller quickly put his son
on the back of the animal and continued on the journey. Soon they
met two men in the midst of a fierce debate. "I say the present
generation shows no respect for its elders." cried the older man.
Spying the miller and his son, he continued, "There, that prove
what I am saying. The young, healthy lad rides while his old
father is forced to walk."
Immediately the father told his son to dismount, and he
climbed on the animal's back. They hadn't gone very far when they
met a man and his wife walking down the road. "Look at that mean
father," the woman exclaimed. "He rides while his little son has
to walk."
Embarrassed, the miller took his son by the are. "Come up
here with me. We will both ride the donkey." Together they rode
toward the market. Soon they met a group of men loading hay
beside the road. "Shame on you," a fat man cried, "overloading the
poor donkey. "Why, the two of you are strong enough to carry that
poor animal."
Bother the miller and his son quickly got off the animal
and walked along until they found a large log. They tied the legs
of the donkey together and slipped the log between the animal's
legs. Then they attempted to carry it over the bridge that led to
the market.
People on the other side of the bridge roared with laughed
when they saw two men trying to carry a donkey. The noise
frightened the animal that he kicked loose and fell into the river
and drowned.
- William R White STORIES FOR TELLING p74-75
[Note: The same story is listed under Popularity.]
/
/
/mPunishment
/s
/i3047-3050
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"We are not punished for our sins, but by them."
- Elbert Hubbard
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 246.
/
/
/mPunishment
/sOf the Wicked
/i3047
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"Punishment is justice for the unjust."
- St. Augustine
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 245.
/
/
/mReason
/s
/i2957
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"He that will not reason is a bigot; he that cannot reason is a
fool; and he that dares not reason is a slave."
- William Drummond
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 251.
/
/
/mReligious Leaders
/sUnfaithful Ministers
/i2098
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"Many have quarreled about religion that never practiced it."
- Benjamin Franklin
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 254.
/
/
/mRemorse
/s
/i1765
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"Remorse is the pain of sin."
- Theodore Parker
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 254.
/
/
/mRemorse
/s
/i1765
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"To be left alone, and face to face with my own crime, had been
just retribution."
- Hendry Wadsworth Longfellow
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 254.
/
/
/mRepentance
/s
/i2706-2712
/d5/1992.101
/t
"Most people repent their sins by thanking God they ain't so
wicked as their neighbors."
- Josh Billings
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 255.
/
/
/mRepentance
/s
/i2706-2712
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"It is much easier to repent of sins that we have committed
than to repent of those that we intend to commit."
- Josh Billings
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 255.
/
/
/mRepentance
/s
/i2706-2712
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"Bad men are full of repentance."
- Aristotle
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 255.
/
/
/mRepentance
/sDuty of
/i2706
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"True repentance is to cease from sinning."
- Ambrose of Milan
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 255.
/
/
/mRepentance
/sDuty of
/i2706
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"Great is the difference betwixt a man's being frightened ar,
and humbled for his sins."
- Thomas Fuller
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 255.
/
/
/mRepentance
/sNeed for
/i2706-2712
/d5/1992.101
/t
Billy Graham tells the story of how he and his wife were once
invited to the home of some wealthy socialites.
They had gathered together a large group of their
neighboring vacationers for a party, and asked me if I would
say a few words. I explained the gospel simply and briefly,
reminding them that pleasure and possessions are not lasting
-- that only the person who knows Jesus Christ as Savior can
know true happiness. As I concluded, one attractive woman
known for her casual morals and high life style, young and
smartly dressed, laughed gaily. "But, Billy," she
protested, "What about those of us who are perfectly happy?"
From God's point of view, that woman was spiritually
wretched, pitiful, poor, blind and naked, as the years ahead
were soon to prove. Christ says to people like her as well,
"Repent!"
- Billy Graham, _Approaching Hoofbeats_, p. 47.
/
/
/mRepentance
/sNeed For
/i2706-2712
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"Repent! Repent of the coldness of your hearts and your lack
of zeal. Repent of your lovelessness and your lack of concern
for others."
- Billy Graham, _Approaching Hoofbeats_, p. 47.
/
/
/mReprobates
/s
/i3006
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"I don't know what a scoundrel is like, but I know what a
respectable man is like, and it's enough to make one's flesh
creep."
- J. M. De Maistre
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 257.
/
/
/mResolutions
/s
/i
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"Good resolutions are simply checks that men draw on a bank
where they have no account."
- Oscar Wilde
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 257.
/
/
/mRest
/s
/i3010-3017
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"Absence of occupation is not rest;
A mind quite vacant is a mind distressed."
- William Cowper
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 258.
/
/
/mRest
/sPhysical
/i3010
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"Who remembers when we used to rest on Sunday instead of
Monday?
- Kin Hubbard
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 258.
/
/
/mRest
/sPhysical
/i3010
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"No man needs a vacation so much as the man who has just had
one."
- Elbert Hubbard
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 298.
/
/
/mRiches
/sDeceptive
/i2810
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"Without a rich heart wealth is an ugly beggar."
- Ralph Waldo Emmerson
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 311.
/
/
/mRiches
/sEarthly
/i2805-2811
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"He is richest who is content with the least."
- Socrates
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 311.
/
/
/mSalvation
/sForgiveness of Sin
/i3127
/d5/1992.101
/t
One time in an evangelistic crusade the evangelist stopped the
invitation and asked for every Christian to witness to the person
next to them. A small boy turned to the gentleman standing near
him and said, "Mister, do you know Jesus as your personal
Savior?" Very condescendingly the man looked down at the little
boy and replied, "Why son, I'm an ordained deacon." With all the
innocence in the world, the little boy replied, "Mister, it don't
matter what you've done. God will save you anyway!"
- Bailey Smith, _Real Evangelism_, p. 117.
/
/
/mSalvation
/sLack Of
/i1087
/d6/1992.101
/tQuote
"Man regardless of his cleverness, his achievements and his
gadgets, is a spiritual pauper without God."
- Billy Graham, _The Secret Of Happiness_, p. 36.
/
/
/mSalvation
/sThe Gift of God
/i3123
/d6/1992.101
/tQuote
"Man does not come to God through works -- he comes to know
God by faith through grace. You cannot work your way toward
happiness and heaven, you cannot moralize your way, you cannot
reform your way, you cannot buy your way. It comes as a gift of
God through Christ."
- Billy Graham, _The Secret Of Happiness_, p. 33.
/
/
/mSatan
/sDefeat of, by Christ
/i3149
/d5/1992.101
/t
Billy Graham relates the follow story of his encounters with
Satanist during his crusades:
Another night in Chicago 300 Satan worshippers approached
McCormick Place with the specific intent of taking over the
platform and stopping the crusade service which was in
progress. They announced their plan in advance, but I
didn't dream they would actually try to storm the platform.
We had just sung the second hymn of the evening. George
Beverly Shea had sung a gospel song and Cliff Barrows was
about to lead a massed choir in a great anthem of praise.
At that moment a policeman rushed to the stage and whispered
something into the ear of the mayor of Chicago, who was
present that night to welcome us.
At the same moment, the Satan worshippers forced their way
past the ushers at the rear of that spacious auditorium and
were proceeding down the back aisle toward the platform.
There were more than 30,000 young people in that Youth Night
service. Only those seated near the back saw the Satan
worshippers enter. The mayor of Chicago turned to me and
said, "Dr. Graham, we'll let the police handle these
intruders."
We never call in the police for crusade duty if we can
help it. "Let me try it another way, Mr. Mayor," I
suggested. I then interrupted the choir's song and
addressed the 30,000 young people there in McCormick Place.
I explained, "There are about 300 Satan worshipers now
entering the auditorium. They say they're going to take
over the platform. You can hear them coming now."
The crowd could hear the rising chant of the Satan
worshipers. Everyone turned to see them moving with
determination down the aisles, past the ushers who were
working to restrain them. They were causing a considerable
disturbance by then. I continued addressing the crowd.
"I'm going to ask you Christian young people to surround
these Satan worshipers," I exhorted. "Love them. Pray for
them. Sing to them. And gradually ease them back toward
the entrances through which they have come."
I will never forget that moment! Hundreds of young
Christians stood to their feet and did exactly as I had
asked. Some grabbed hands and began to sing. Others put
their arms around the Satan worshipers and began to pray for
them. Everyone else in McCormick Place sat praying as God's
Spirit moved through His people to confound the work of
Satan in our midst. I stood watching in silence. I waited
and prayed until peace was restored and the service could
resume.
- Billy Graham, _Approaching Hoofbeats_, pp. 85-86.
/
/
/mSatan
/sDuty of Resisting
/i3154
/d5/1992.101
/tJoke
We wanted to have a masquerade party. We said other people
are having them, they sounded like fun and we'd never had one.
So we met in a fellow's house; he lived way out on a country
road. We were going to meet out there and have that party.
Well, I dressed up like the devil, put on a little red devil
outfit, little horns and everything, and I was going out on the
road at night, when a storm came up, and I needed a place to get
out of the weather. I darted into a little building there
besides the road, and it just so happened, it was a little
country church, and they were right in the midst of a big revival
meeting. Well, you can imagine what a commotion it caused when I
jumped up in the door with my devil outfit on. They went out the
doors, windows, anyplace they could to get out. One fellow threw
up both arms and said, "Mr. Devil, I've been a member of this
church for twenty years, but I've been on your side all along!"
- Dr. Carl Hurley, Lexington, KY
- _The Preacher Joke Book_, edited by Loyal Jones, pp. 70-1.
/
/
/mSchism
/s
/i3162
/d5/1992.101
/tJoke, Baptist on the Bridge
Once I was in San Francisco, walking across the Golden Gate
Bridge, when I saw this guy on the bridge about to jump off. I
thought I'd try to stop him. I said, "Don't jump."
He turned his head. You've heard of the Elephant Man? He had
the ugliest face I have ever seen. My heart went out to him. I
said, "Why are you going to jump from the bridge?" He said
because all his life people had made fun of his face and because
nobody loved him. I told him, "God loves you." He asked, "How
do you know there is a God?"
I said, "Of course there's a God. Do you think that billions
of years ago, a bunch of molecules floating around at random
without rhyme or reason could someday have created all this?"
He said, "I guess you're right." And a tear came to his eye.
I said, "Are you a Christian or Jew or Hindu or what?"
He said, "A Christian."
I said, "Small world! Me too. Are you a Protestant or
Catholic or Greek Orthodox?"
He said, "Protestant."
I said, "Me too! What denomination of Protestant?"
He said, "Baptist."
I said, "Me too! Northern Baptist or Southern Baptist?"
He said, "Northern Baptist."
I said, "Me too! Are you Northern Conservative Baptist or
Northern Liberal Baptist?"
He said, "Northern Conservative Baptist."
I said, "Me too! Are you Northern Conservative Fundamentalist
Baptist or Northern Conservative Reformed Baptist?"
He said, "Northern Conservative Fundamentalist Baptist."
I said, Me too! Are you Northern Conservative Fundamentalist
Baptist Great Lakes or Northern Conservative Fundamentalist
Baptist Eastern Region?"
He said, "Northern Conservative Fundamentalist Baptist Great
Lakes Region."
I said, "Me too! Are you Northern Conservative Fundamentalist
Baptist Great Lakes Region Council of 1879 or Northern
Conservative Fundamentalist Baptist Great Lakes Region Council of
1912?"
He said, "Northern Conservative Fundamentalist Baptist Great
Lakes Region Council of 1912."
I screamed, "DIE HERETIC!" And pushed him off the bridge!
- Michael Hostetler, _Illustrating The Sermon_, pp 78-79;
adapted from a routine by comedian Emo Philips.
/
/
/mScoffers
/s
/i3037
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"Most of the things worth doing in the world have been
declared impossible before they were done."
- Louis D. Brandeis
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 169.
/
/
/mScoffers
/s
/i3037
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"Impossibility: a word only found in the dictionary of
fools."
- Napoleon Bonaparte
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 169.
/
/
/mScoffers/Skeptics
/s
/i3037
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"Skepticism is slow suicide."
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 273.
/
/
/mSecrets
/s
/i
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"Three may keep a secret it two of them are dead."
- Benjamin Franklin
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 266.
/
/
/mSecrets
/s
/i
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"To keep your secret is wisdom; but to expect others to keep it
is folly."
- Samuel Johnson
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 266.
/
/
/mSecrets
/s
/i
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"I usually get my stuff from people who promised somebody else
that they would keep it secret."
- Walter Winchell
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 266.
/
/
/mSelf-Exaltation
/s
/i3194
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"There's a lot to be said for the fellow who doesn't say it
himself."
- Maurice Switzer
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 208.
/
/
/mSelfishness
/s
/i3222-3223
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"He that falls in love with himself will have no rivals."
- Benjamin Franklin
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 196.
/
/
/mSelfishness
/s
/i3222-3223
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"The miser is as much in want of that which he has, as of that
which he has not."
- Publilius Syrus
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 206.
/
/
/mSelfishness
/s
/i3222-3223
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"The miser, poor fool, not only starves his body, but also his
own soul."
- Theodore Parker
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 206.
/
/
/mSelfishness
/s
/i3222-3223
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"The miser, starving his brother's body, starves also his own
soul, and at death shall creep out of his great estate of
injustice, poor and naked and miserable."
- Theodore Parker
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 206.
/
/
/mSelfishness
/s
/i3222-3223
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"The man who lives by himself and for himself is likely to be
corrupted by the company he keeps."
- Charles H. Parkhurst
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 268.
/
/
/mSelfishness
/s
/i3222-3223
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"He who lives only to benefit himself confers on the world a
benefit when he dies."
- Tertullian
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 268.
/
/
/mSelfishness
/s
/i3222-3223
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"That man who lives for self alone,
Lives for the meanest mortal known."
- Joaquin Miller
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 268.
/
/
/mSilence
/s
/i3289-3294
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"Blessed is the man who, having nothing to say, abstains from
giving wordy evidence of the fact."
- George Elliot
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 272.
/
/
/mSilence
/s
/i3289-3294
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"If you keep your mouth shut you will never put your foot in
it."
- Austin O'Malley
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 272.
/
/
/mSin
/sAttractions of
/i3351
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"Sex has become one of the most discussed subjects of modern
times. The Victorians pretended it did not exist; the moderns
pretend that nothing else exists."
- Fulton J. Sheen
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 271.
/
/
/mSin
/sConcealment of
/i800
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"Two wrongs do not make a right."
- English Proverb
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 319.
/
/
/mSin
/sDenounced
/i2671
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"He that falls into sin is a man; that grieves at it, is a
saint; that boasteth of it, is a devil."
- Thomas Fuller
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 272.
/
/
/mSin
/sDestructive
/i3350
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"Sin is not harmful because it is forbidden, but it is
forbidden because it is hurtful."
- Benjamin Franklin
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 273.
/
/
/mSin
/sDestructive
/i3350
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
Little faults can ruin a person just as little holes can ruin
a tire.
- Unknown
/
/
/mSin
/sEffects of
/i4205
/d6/1992.101
/tQuote
"The deepest problems of the human race are spiritual in
nature. They are rooted in man's refusal to seek God's way for
his life. The problem is the human heart, which God alone can
change."
- Billy Graham, _Approaching Hoofbeats_, p. 136.
/
/
/mSin
/sEffects of
/i4205
/d6/1992.101
/tQuote
"Now, the Bible teaches that our souls have a disease. It is
worse than dreaded cancer, polio, or heart disease. It is the
plague that causes all the troubles and difficulties in the
world. It causes all the troubles, confusions, and
disillusionments in your own life. The name of the disease is an
ugly word. We don't like to use it... In our desire to be
modern, we (have) almost forgotten it, but once again we are
beginning to realize that it is the root of all man's troubles.
It is sin."
- Billy Graham, _The Secret Of Happiness_, p. 26.
/
/
/mSin
/sJesus Is The Answer
/i3362
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"There is only one passion that can help us control the many
passions which plague us, that is the passion to know and obey
God. When this primary passion grows cold, we give in to the
lower passions that would control us. When we get out of close
relationship with Christ, we try to fill that aching void and
loneliness with other things. We read about it every day in the
newspaper and watch it on our television screens."
- Billy Graham, _Approaching Hoofbeats_, p. 56.
/
/
/mSin
/sLoved by Men
/i3348
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"People do not lack strength; they lack will."
- Victor Hugo
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 312.
/
/
/mSin
/sTo be Forsaken
/i3346
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"Man-like it is to fall into sin; fiendlike it is to dwell
therein."
- Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 273.
/
/
/mSlander
/s
/i3310-3313
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"Slanders are like flies, that pass all over a man's good parts
to light on his sores."
- Unknown
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 273.
/
/
/mSlander
/s
/i3310-3313
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"Never throw mud. You may miss your mark, but you will have
dirty hands."
- Joseph Parker
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 274
/
/
/mSleep
/sLove of
/i3377
/d5/1992.101
/tJoke
A certain fellow had a habit of going to sleep in church,
which irritated the preacher. One Sunday, he decided to
embarrass him. At the tail end of his sermon, when the offending
parishioner was sleeping soundly, he asked everybody who thought
they were going to heaven to stand. Everyone stood up except the
sleeping man. The preacher smiled slyly and then in a low voice
said, "Now, everybody who thinks he's going to hell" -- he
paused, and then shouted -- "STAND UP!"
The sleeping man awoke and jumped to his feet. He looked
around and saw that everybody else was seated, looked at the
minister and said, "I don't know what we're voting on, Preacher,
but it appears that you and me lost."
- Loyal Jones
- _The Preacher Joke Book_, edited by Loyal Jones, p. 52.
/
/
/mSlothfulness
/s
/i581
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"Sloth, like rust, consumes faster than labor wears, while the
used key is always bright."
- Benjamin Franklin
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 165.
/
/
/mSlothfulness
/s
/i581
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"Few minds wear out, more rust out."
- Christian Nestell Bovee
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 205.
/
/
/mSluggards
/s
/i3384
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"It is surprising what a man can do when he has to, and how
little most men will do when they don't have to."
- Walter Linn
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 215.
/
/
/mSorrow
/s
/i1944
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"The world is so full of care and sorrow that it is a gracious
debt we owe to one another to discover the bright crystals of
delight hidden in somber circumstances and irksome tasks."
- Helen Keller
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 277.
/
/
/mSorrow
/s
/i1944
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"Earth hath no sorrow that heaven cannot heal."
- Thomas Moore
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 277.
/
/
/mStubbornness
/s
/i3229-3230
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"The foolish and the dead alone never change their opinions."
- James Russell Lowell
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 218.
/
/
/mStubbornness
/s
/i3229-3230
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"Those who never retract their opinions love themselves more
than they love truth."
- Joseph Joubert
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 218.
/
/
/mSuccess
/s
/i2897-2900
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"Big shots are only little shots who keep shooting."
- Christopher Morley
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 227.
/
/
/mSuccess
/sCannot Make One Happy
/i2131-2132
/d6/1992.101
/tQuote
Billy Graham tells of a famous movie star who once said, "I
have money, beauty, glamour and popularity. I should be the
happiest woman in the world, but I am miserable. Why?"
- Billy Graham, _The Secret Of Happiness_, p. 11.
/
/
/mSuccess
/sSecret Of
/i2897-2900
/d6/1992.101
/tQuote
"Suffering and success go together. If you are succeeding
without suffering, it is because others before you have suffered;
if you are suffering without succeeding, it is that others after
you may succeed."
- Dr. Edward Judson in an address at the Judson Memorial
Church on the life of his father Adoniram Judson, cited by
Billy Graham, _The Secret Of Happiness_, p. 51.
/
/
/mSuffering
/s
/i3474-3488
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"The economic and technological triumphs of the past few years
have not solved as many problems as we thought they would, and,
in fact, have brought us new problems we did not foresee."
- Henry Ford II
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 232.
/
/
/mSuffering
/s
/i3474-3488
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"It is a glorious thing to be indifferent to suffering, but
only to one's own suffering."
- Robert Lynd
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 282.
/
/
/mSuffering
/s
/i3474-3488
/d6/1992.101
/tQuote
"I am sorry for the man who can't feel the whip when it is
laid on the other man's back."
- Abraham Lincoln, cited by Billy Graham, in _The Secret Of
Happiness_, p. 45.
/
/
/mSuperstition
/s
/i2998
/d5/1992.101
/tFear of the Number 13
Fear of the number 13 is very real for many people.
On Friday, Nov. 13, 1931, the liner AQUITANIA was scheduled to
sail from New York to Liverpool. Scores of passengers registered
hysterical complaints -- and the ship's officials postponed
departure until after midnight.
In French Lick, Indiana (pop. 2,000), a few years ago, the
town fathers officially decreed that all black cats had to wear
bells on Friday, the 13th. The reason was to ease the strain on
the citizenry, who were scared silly having black cats cross
their paths on that day of all days.
- Robert G. Lee, _Sermonic Library_, p. 142.
/
/
/mSympathy
/s
/i3514-3516
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"Sympathy is a virtue unknown in nature."
- Paul Eipper
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 283.
/
/
/mTact
/s
/i1999
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"Tact: the ability to describe others as they see themselves."
- Abraham Lincoln
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 284.
/
/
/mTaxes
/s
/i2529-2530
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"Death and taxes are inevitable."
- Thomas C. Haliburton
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 285.
/
/
/mTaxes
/s
/i2529-2530
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"Never before have so many been taken for so much and left with
so little."
- Van Panopoulos
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 285.
/
/
/mTaxes
/s
/i2529-2530
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"I'm proud to pay taxes in the United States; the only thing
is, I could be just as proud for half the money."
- Arthur Godfrey
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 285.
/
/
/mTaxes
/s
/i2529-2530
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"What is the difference between a taxidermist and a tax
collector? [Answer] The taxidermist takes only your skin."
- Mark Twain
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 285.
/
/
/mTaxes
/s
/i2529-2530
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"The tax collector must love poor people -- he's creating so
many of them."
- Bill Vaughan
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 285.
/
/
/mTears
/s
/i3560-3561
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"Only eyes washed by tears can see clearly."
- Louis L. Mann
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 304.
/
/
/mTestimony
/s
/i3599-3605
/d5/1992.101
/tJoke
Many years ago there was a custom in a section of my country,
known as the South Mountains, to hold religious meetings at which
the oldest members of the congregation were called upon to stand
up and publicly testify to their religious experiences. On one
occasion they were holding such a meeting in one of the churches,
and old Uncle Ephriam Swink, a South Mountaineer, whose body was
all bent and distorted with arthritis, was present. All of the
other members of the congregation except Uncle Ephriam arose and
gave testimony to their religious experiences. Uncle Ephriam
kept his seat. Thereupon, the moderator said, "Brother Ephriam,
suppose you tell us what the Lord has done for you."
Uncle Ephriam arose, with bent and distorted body, and said,
"Brother, he has mighty nigh ruint me."
- Sen. Sam J. Ervin, Jr.; Morganton, NC
- _The Preacher Joke Book_, edited by Loyal Jones, p. 35.
/
/
/mTime
/sRight Use of
/i3626
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"Short as life is, we make it shorter by the careless waste of
time."
- Victor Hugo
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 309.
/
/
/mTongue
/sRestraint of
/i3308
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"The best time for you to hold your tongue is the time you feel
you must say something or bust."
- Josh Billings
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 267.
/
/
/mTongue
/sRestraint of
/i3308
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"Eating words has never given me indigestion."
- Winston Churchill
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 315.
/
/
/mTrials
/s
/i1952
/d5/1992.101
/t
"It was not easy to be a Christian (during the days of the
apostles). It is not easy now."
- Billy Graham, _Approaching Hoofbeats_, p. 34.
/
/
/mTrials
/s
/i1952
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"There can be no rainbow without a cloud and a storm."
- J. H. Vincent
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 277.
/
/
/mTrouble
/s
/i1952
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"If you don't learn to laugh at trouble, you won't have anything
to laugh at when you're old."
- Ed Howe
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 189.
/
/
/mTrouble
/s
/i1952
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"There are a good many real miseries in life that we cannot
help smiling at, but they are the smiles that make wrinkles and
not dimples."
- Oliver Wendell Holmes
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 207.
/
/
/mTrouble
/s
/i1952
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"Into each life some rain must fall."
- Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 277.
/
/
/mTrouble
/s
/i1952
/d6/1992.101
/tQuote
"The worst can happen but the best remains."
- Corrie ten Boom, quoted by Billy Graham in _Approaching
Hoofbeats_, p. 93.
/
/
/mTrouble
/s
/i1952
/d6/1992.101
/tQuote
"We cannot pretend that life in Christ always means victory,
miracle and success in this life. When we tell only the stories
of victory, we tell only a part of the truth. When we recount
only the answered prayers, we oversimplify. When we imply the
Christian faith involves no yoke, we lie."
- Billy Graham, _Approaching Hoofbeats_, p. 94.
/
/
/mTrue Religion
/s
/i2985-2987
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"Facts are facts and will not disappear on account of your
likes."
- Jowaharial Nehru
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 251.
/
/
/mTrue Religion
/s
/i2985-2987
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"Superstition, idolatry, and hypocrisy have ample wages, but
truth goes begging."
- Martin Luther
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 283.
/
/
/mTrust
/sIn God
/i1214-1218
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"Put your trust in God, but keep your powder dry."
- Oliver Cromwell
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 292.
/
/
/mTruth
/s
/i3697-3701
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"Men occasionally stumble over the truth, but most of them pick
themselves up and hurry off as if nothing happened."
- Winston Churchill
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 293.
/
/
/mTruth
/s
/i3697-3701
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"Everyone wishes to have truth on his side, but not everyone
wishes to be on the side of truth."
- Richard Whately
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 293.
/
/
/mTruth
/sPreciousness of
/i3697
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"As scarce as truth is, the supply has always been in excess of
the demand."
- Josh Billings
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 294.
/
/
/mVengeance
/s
/i3131
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"Vengeance has no foresight."
- Napoleon Bonaparte
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 300.
/
/
/mVictory
/sSpiritual
/i372-374
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"Christ commands us to 'Overcome!' in the strength He alone
can supply as we turn to Him in faith, trusting His promised."
- Billy Graham, _Approaching Hoofbeats_, p. 62.
/
/
/mVirtues
/sChristian
/i4135
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"Virtue must be valuable, if men and women of all degrees
pretend to have it."
- Ed Howe
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 304.
/
/
/mWakefulness
/s
/i3381-3382
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"He is most free from danger, who, even when safe, is on his
guard."
- Publilus Syrus
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 302.
/
/
/mWarnings
/sIgnored
/i1794-1799
/d5/1992.101
/t
[Here's a sample illustration from one of Billy Graham's books.
No one tells an illustration any better than Billy Graham! We
could all learn a lot from observing him!]
Mt. Saint Helens belched gray steam plumes hundreds of feet
into the blue Oregon sky. Geologists watched their seismographs
in growing wonder as the earth danced beneath their feet.
Rangers and state police, sirens blaring, herded tourists and
residents from an ever-widening zone of danger. Every piece of
scientific evidence being collected in the laboratories and on
the field predicted the volcano would soon explode with a fury
that would leave the forests flattened.
"Warning!" blared the loudspeakers on the patrol cars and
helicopters hovering overhead. "Warning!" blinked battery-
powered signs at every major crossroad. "Warning!" pleaded radio
and television announcers, shortwave and citizen-band operators.
"Warning!" echoed up and down the mountain, and lakeside
villages, tourist camps and hiking trails emptied as people heard
the warnings and fled for their lives.
But Harry Truman refused to budge. Harry was the caretaker of
a recreation lodge on Spirit Lake, five miles north of Mt. Saint
Helens's smoke-enshrouded peak. The rangers warned Harry of the
coming blast. Even Harry's sister called to talk sense into the
old man's head. But Harry ignored the warnings. From the
picture-postcard beauty of his lakeside home reflecting the snow-
capped peak overhead, Harry grinned on national television and
said, "Nobody knows more about this mountain than Harry and it
don't dare blow up on him...
On 18 May 1980, as the boiling gases beneath the mountain's
surface bulged and buckled the landscape to its final limits,
Harry Truman cooked his eggs and bacon, fed his sixteen cats the
scraps, and began to plant petunias around the border of his
freshly mowed lawn. At 8:31 a.m. the mountain exploded.
Did Harry regret his decision in that millisecond he had
before the concussive waves, traveling faster than the speed of
sound, flattened him and everything else for 150 square miles?
Did he have time to mourn his stubbornness as millions of tons of
rock disintegrated and disappeared into a cloud reaching ten
miles into the sky? Did he struggle against the wall of mud and
ash fifty feet high that buried his cabin, his cats and his
freshly mowed lawn -- or had he been vaporized (like 100,000
people at Hiroshima) when the mountain erupted with a force 500
times greater than the nuclear bomb which leveled that Japanese
city?
- Billy Graham, _Approaching Hoofbeats_, pp. 13-14.
/
/
/mWealth
/sPerils Of
/i2806
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"He does not possess wealth that allows it to possess him."
- Benjamin Franklin
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 310.
/
/
/mWeather
/s
/i2307-2331
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"Sunshine is delicious, rain is refreshing, wind braces up,
snow is exhilarating; there is no such thing as bad weather, only
different kinds of good weather."
- John Ruskin
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 311.
"John Ruskin never had his house hit by a tornado!"
- Bill Gordon
/
/
/mWicked
/sCharacteristics of
/i3065
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"There is a method in man's wickedness; it grows up by
degrees."
- Beaumont and Fletcher
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 311.
/
/
/mWicked
/sFuture State of
/i1368-1375
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"God bears with the wicked, but not forever."
- Miguel de Cervantes
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 312.
/
/
/mWisdom
/sExamples of Men Having
/i3846-3847
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"The wisest man is generally he who thinks himself the least
so."
- Nicolas Boileau-Despreaux
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 313.
/
/
/mWitnessing
/sExcuses
/i3604
/d5/1992.101
/t
Often I have heard people say that they would witness for
Jesus if only they could talk or think like so and so. If they
just had someone else's ability, what couldn't they do for Jesus.
I have often wanted to reply by saying, "My friend, you would
not do a cotton-picking thing with someone else's ability if you
are not using the ability you already have. You're kidding
yourself, and that's not even being honest. The truth of the
matter is you already have the ability necessary to be a
successful witness for our Lord Jesus Christ. If you'll just use
what God has already given you, you will be given more to use,
but it you don't use what you have, you'll lose it.
- Zig Ziglar
/
/
/mWitnessing
/sTragic Failure Of
/i3604
/d5/1992.101
/t
The problem with witnessing for most of us is that we know
more than we do! We are hearers of the word, but not doers.
Most of us have won a study course seal, but have never won a
soul! While we continue to use new methods, new soul winning
ideas, and new institutes and tracts to inform people how to be
soul winners the truth of the matter is that most of our people
do not want to be soul winners.
- John Bisagno
/
/
/mWomen
/sAs Wives
/i3862
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"If you haven't seen your wife smile at a traffic cop, you
haven't seen her smile her prettiest."
- Kin Hubbard
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 275.
/
/
/mWomen
/sAs Wives
/i3862
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"I chose my wife, as she did her wedding gown, for qualities
that would wear well."
- Oliver Goldsmith
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 312.
/
/
/mWomen
/sAs Wives
/i3862
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"Of all of the home remedies, a good wife is best."
- Kin Hubbard
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 312.
/
/
/mWomen
/sAs Wives
/i3862
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"She is but half a wife that is not, nor capable of being, a
friend."
- William Penn
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 312.
/
/
/mWomen
/sAs Wives
/i3862
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"A wife is a gift bestowed upon man to reconcile him to the
loss of paradise."
- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 312.
/
/
/mWomen
/sAs Wives
/i3862
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"She is not made to be the admiration of all, but the happiness
of one."
- Edmund Burke
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 314.
/
/
/mWomen
/sRights of
/i3860
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"Of all the rights of women, the greatest is to be a mother."
- Lin Yutang
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 314.
/
/
/mWomen
/sSufferings of
/i3872-3873
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"Being a woman is a terribly difficult task since it consists
principally in dealing with men."
- Joseph Conrad
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 314.
/
/
/mWord of Faith Movement
/s
/i2988-2998
/d6/1992.101
/tQuote
"Some even declare that if you become a Christian you will get
rich or always be successful. In our attempts to share the faith
we have given the impression that, once you have accepted Christ
as Savior and Lord, your problems are over. That is not true.
Becoming "new" in Christ is a wonderful beginning -- but it isn't
the end of pain or problems in our lives. It is the beginning of
our facing up to them. Being a Christian involves a lifetime of
hard work, dedicated study and difficult decisions."
- Billy Graham, _Approaching Hoofbeats_, p. 91.
/
/
/mWorks
/sEvil
/i3909
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"No Man has a right to do what he pleases, except when he
pleases to do right."
- Charles Simmons
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 262.
/
/
/mWorks
/sGood
/i3902-3905
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"Do not wait for extraordinary circumstances to do good; try to
use ordinary situations."
- Jean Paul Richter
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 219.
/
/
/mWorks
/sGood
/i3902-3905
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"A ship in harbor is safe, but that is not what ships are built
for."
- John A. Shedd
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 264.
/
/
/mWorry
/s
/i3021-3022
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"Wrinkles should merely indicate where smiles have been."
- Mark Twain
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 274.
/
/
/mWrath
/sOf Man
/i3953
/d5/1992.101
/tJoke
A gentle Quaker farmer had a particularly stubborn and
uncooperative mule who tried his patience daily. One day, after
a trying time plowing corn, the Quaker addressed his mule: "Thou
knowest that I cannot strike thee, and thou knowest that I cannot
curse thee, but what thou doesn't know is that I can sell thee to
a Baptist and he will do to thee what I cannot."
- Loyal Jones
- _The Preacher Joke Book_, edited by Loyal Jones, p. 42.
/
/
/mYoung People
/s
/i3964-3976
/d4/1992.101
/tQuote
"I am not young enough to know everything."
- James Matthew Barrie
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 187.
/
/
/mYoung People
/s
/i3964-3976
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"Youth today must be strong, unafraid, and a better taxpayer
than its father."
- H. V. Wade
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 319.
/
/
/mYoung People
/s
/i3964-3976
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"Youth comes but once in a lifetime."
- Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 320.
/
/
/mYoung People
/sSins of Youth
/i3975-3976
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"I have never known a man who was sensual in his youth, who was
high-minded when old."
- Charles Sumner
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 270
/
/
/mYoung People
/sSins of Youth
/i3975-3976
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"Wild oats make a bad autumn crop."
- Cynics Calendar
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 301.
/
/
/mZeal
/sUnwise
/i3983
/d5/1992.101
/tQuote
"Zeal is fit only for wise men but is found mostly in fools."
- Ancient Proverb
- _Instant Quotation Dictionary_, p. 321.