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-
- After many many requests: *drum roll*
-
- With a few more additions and some more text explanations...
-
- Here is Chuck's top 10 (v2) list of things to do when you find someone
- left their Vax/VMS account without logging out:
-
- 10. Just start copying their existing files to random names and fill up
- their disk quota. Use long names and don't repeat them so they are
- hard to delete. Like kdielshigleiahgpzpaliillapzpwolvzzibnx/wozovne.mpr
- Its much easier than it looks.
-
- 9. Change their default directory to someplace they don't have privileges for.
- Oh, like maybe Disk2:[fac.Dr_Meany]
-
- 8. Change all of their protection settings so that they do not have access
- to their own files. (This one brings a tear to my eye.)
-
- 7. Put all their files into a directory called I_am_stupid.duh
- This can be fun if they never figured out what set default means.
-
- 6. Edt their login.com file: Change all of their def/nolog stuff
- so that each time they try to talk to their friend they request
- that the OPER mount disk_14a. (Or SYSADMIN, USER, etc...)
- OPER has SUCH a good sense of humor about this.
-
- 5. You can't increase your own priority for the CPU but you *can* lower it.
- Drop their priority down to 0. -- When they are tired of waiting 20 min
- just to do a 'dir' you can explain to them that they must be using
- to much space (see number 3).
-
- 4. Edit their login.com file: Add this line; $ lo
- (when they login they automatically logout!)
- Nice, quick, simple to implement... etc.
-
- 4b. Edit their login.com file: Add this line; $ lo*gout == "help logout"
- This way they CAN'T logout! Sorta the roach motel idea, they
- can login, but they can't logout.
-
- 3. Save a little disk space and combine all their files, executables too,
- into one big file. Don't forget to erase all those other files.
-
- 2. Change their prompt to read: @system error -- please logout and try again.
- A true classic and a personal favorite.
-
- 1. Get in their email and let that prof know what you REALLY think
- about their freaking class! (Slightly outmoded in the age of forgery.)
-
- A. Get in their login.com and add this line: $dir == "dir fishy.smile"
- Then when they type DIR they see FILES NOT FOUND. That'll up their
- heart rate.
-
- B. Take full advantage of the REMIND function. Set it to REMIND the
- person every 10 min that they need to log off. Set it so that it
- appears to tell them its time to logoff. Practice this one at home.
-
-
- * Chuck M. Jarvis
- * Jcm32876@vax1.utulsa.edu
-