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- "Never regret the time that was needed for doing good" -- Joseph Joubert
- "Let our advance worrying become advance thinking and planning" -- W.Churchill
- "The man of true greatness never loses his child's heart" -- Mencius
- "Few things are impossible to diligence and skill" -- Samuel Johnson
- Did you send in your registration card for this software? I'm going to tell!
- "No failure is ever final, nor is any success" -- Denis Waitley
- "Keep your face to the sunshine and you cannot see the shadow" -- Helen Keller
- "To travel hopefully is better than to arrive" -- Sir James Jeans
- "Failure is success if we learn from it" -- Malcom S. Forbes
- "The best way to have a good idea is to have lots of ideas" -- Dr. L.Pauling
- I got what it takes, but nobody wants it
- No!! now what else is on your mind?
- How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could get welfare?
- If at first you don't succeed, try second or third, or shortstop
- To understand "Fundamentalism", it helps to know what "Fundament" means
- 186000 Miles per second, it's not just a good idea, it's the law
- I wish today were monday, then I could find out how the weekend came out
- Fly concord - Breakfast in London, Lunch in Washington, Baggage in Madrid
- Time is nature's way of keeping everything from happening at once
- Time flies like an arrow, fruit flies like a banana
- When the going gets tough buy a vowel
- Biology grows on you
- Infinity is far out
- For every activist, there is an equal and opposite reactionary
- Football is to higher education what bullfighting is to agriculture
- Does the noise in my head bother you?
- Drive carefully, this town has two cemetaries and no hospital
- Get really stoned, drink wet cement
- A good time is a terrible thing to waste
- The best way to help the poor is by becoming one
- Do it to it
- I may not always be right but I'm never wrong
- Violence is the last refuge of the incompetent
- Humor is the last resort of the hopelessly unenlightened
- Tell me again how lucky I am to be working here, I keep forgetting
- If E=MC2 How do they make ice cream go curly at the dairy queen?
- Money still talks, but it has to catch its breath more often
- A puritan is someone who is deathly afraid that someone somewhere is having fun
- Support bacteria - It's the only culture some people have
- Murphy's law only fails when you try to demonstrate it
- Flow chart: A graphic representation of the fastest way to the restroom
- Two heads are better than none
- No matter where you go, you are there
- "TV - Chewing gum for the eyes" -- Frank Lloyd Wright
- Diplomacy is the art of saying "Nice Doggy" until you can find a rock
- All syllogisms have 3 parts, therefore this is not a syllogism
- "Be prepared to go mad with fixed rule and method" -- Horace
- If you're not part of the solution, you're part of the precipitate
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