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$Title{Anthology Of Shorter Works
Second Branch - The Boots}
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$Author{Dickens, Charles}
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$Date{}
$Log{See The Walmers*0064901.scf
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Title:       Anthology Of Shorter Works
Book:        Holly Tree: Three Branches, The
Author:      Dickens, Charles

Second Branch - The Boots

     Where had he been in his time?  he repeated, when I asked him the
question.  Lord, he had been everywhere!  And what had he been?  Bless you,
he had been everything you could mention a'most!

     Seen a good deal?  Why, of course he had.  I should say so, he could
assure me, if I only knew about a twentieth part of what had come in his way.
Why, it would be easier for him, he expected, to tell what he hadn't seen
than what he had.  Ah!  A deal, it would.

     What was the curiousest thing he had seen?  Well!  He didn't know.  He
couldn't momently name what was the curiousest thing he had seen, - unless
it was a Unicorn, - and he see him once at a Fair.  But supposing a young
gentleman not eight year old was to run away with a fine young woman of
seven, might I think that a queer start?  Certainly?  Then that was a start
as he himself had had his blessed eyes on, and he had cleaned the shoes they
run away in, - and they were so little that he couldn't get his hand into
'em.

     Master Harry Walmers's father, you see, he lived at the Elmses, down
away by Shooter's Hill there, six or seven mile from Lunnon.  He was a
gentleman of spirit, and good-looking, and held his head up when he walked,
and had what you may call Fire about him.  He wrote poetry, and he rode, and
he ran, and he cricketed, and he danced, and he acted, and he done it all
equally beautiful.  He was uncommon proud of Master Harry as was his only
child; but he didn't spoil him neither.  He was a gentleman that had a will
of his own and a eye of his own, and that would be minded.  Consequently,
though he made quite a companion of the fine bright boy, and was delighted
to see him so fond of reading his fairy books, and was never tired of hearing
him say my name is Norval, or hearing him sing his songs about Young May
Moons is beaming love, and When he as adores thee has left but the name, and
that; still he kept the command over the child, and the child was a child,
and it's to be wished more of 'em was!

     How did Boots happen to know all this?  Why, through being
under-gardener.  Of course he couldn't be under-gardener, and be always
about, in the summer-time, near the windows on the lawn, a mowing, and
sweeping, and weeding, and pruning, and this and that, without getting
acquainted with the ways of the family.  Even supposing Master Harry hadn't
come to him one morning early, and said, "Cobbs, how should you spell Norah,
if you was asked?" and then begun cutting it in print all over the fence.

     He couldn't say he had taken particular notice of children before that;
but really it was pretty to see them two mites agoing about the place
together, deep in love.  And the courage of the boy!  Bless your soul, he'd
have throwed off his little hat and tucked up his little sleeves, and gone
in at a Lion, he would if they had happened to meet one, and she had been
frightened of him.  One day he stops, along with her, where Boots was hoeing
weeds in the gravel, and says, speaking up, "Cobbs," he says, "I like you."
"Do you, sir?  I'm proud to hear it." "Yes, I do, Cobbs.  Why do I like you,
do you think, Cobbs?" "Don't know, Master Harry, I am sure." "Because Norah
likes you, Cobbs." "Indeed, sir?  That's very gratifying." "Gratifying,
Cobbs?  It's better than millions of the brightest diamonds to be liked by
Norah." "Certainly, sir." "You're going away, ain't you, Cobbs?" "Yes sir."
"Would you like another situation, Cobbs!" "Well, sir, I shouldn't object,
if it was a good 'un." "Then, Cobbs," says he, "you shall be our Head
Gardener when we are married." And he tucks her, in her little sky-blue
mantle, under his arm and walks away.

     Boots could assure me that it was better than a picter, and equal to a
play, to see them babies, with their long, bright, curling hair, their
sparkling eyes, and their beautiful, light tread, a rambling about the
garden, deep in love.  Boots was of opinion that the birds believed they was
birds, and kept up with 'em, singing to please 'em.  Sometimes they would
creep under the Tulip-tree, and would sit there with their arms round one
another's necks, and their soft cheeks touching, a reading about the Prince,
and the Dragon, and the good and bad enchanters, and the king's fair
daughter.  Sometimes he would hear them planning about having a house in a
forest, keeping bees, and a cow, and living entirely on milk and honey.  Once
he came upon them by the pond, and heard Master Harry say, "Adorable Norah,
kiss me, and say you love me to distraction, or I'll jump in head-foremost."
And Boots made no question he would have done it if she hadn't complied.  On
the whole, Boots said it had a tendency to make him feel as if he was in love
himself, - only he didn't exactly know who with.

     "Cobbs," said Master Harry, one evening, when Cobbs was watering the
flowers, "I am going on a visit, this present Midsummer, to my grandmamma's
at York."

     "Are you indeed, sir?  I hope you'll have a pleasant time.  I am going
into Yorkshire myself, when I leave here."

     "Are you going to your grandmamma's, Cobbs?"

     "No, sir.  I haven't got such a thing."

     "Not as a grandmamma, Cobbs?"

     "No, sir."

     The boy looked on at the watering of the flowers for a little while, and
then said, "I shall be very glad indeed to go, Cobbs, - Norah's going."

     "You'll be all right then sir," says Cobbs, "with your beautiful
sweetheart by your side."

     "Cobbs," returned the boy, flushing, "I never let anybody joke about it,
when I can prevent them."

     "It wasn't a joke, sir," says Cobbs, with humility, - "wasn't so meant."

     "I am glad of that, Cobbs, because I like you, you know, and you're
going to live with us. - Cobbs!"

     "Sir."

     "What do you think my grandmamma gives me when I go down there?"

     "I couldn't so much as make a guess, sir."

     "A Bank of England five-pound note, Cobbs."

     "Whew!" says Cobbs, "that's a spanking sum of money, Master Harry."

     "A person could do a good deal with such a sum of money as that, -
couldn't a person, Cobbs?"

     "I believe you, sir!"

     "Cobbs," said the boy, "I'll tell you a secret.  At Norah's house, they
have been joking her about me, and pretending to laugh at our being engaged, -
pretending to make game of it, Cobbs!"

     "Such, sir," says Cobbs, "is the depravity of human natur."

     The boy, looking exactly like his father, stood for a few minutes with
his glowing face towards the sunset, and then departed with, "Good night,
Cobbs.  I'm going in."

     If I was to ask Boots how it happened that he was a going to leave that
place just at that present time, well, he couldn't rightly answer me.  He did
suppose he might have stayed there till now if he had been anyways inclined.
But, you see, he was younger then, and he wanted change.  That's what he
wanted, - change.  Mr. Walmers, he said to him when he give him notice of his
intentions to leave, "Cobbs," he says, "have you anythink to complain of?
I make the inquiry because if I find that any of my people really has
anythink to complain of, I wish to make it right if I can." "No, sir," says
Cobbs; "thanking you, sir, I find myself as well sitiwated here as I could
hope to be anywheres.  The truth is, sir, that I'm a going to seek my
fortun." "O, indeed, Cobbs?" he says; "I hope you may find it." And Boots
could assure me - which he did, touching his hair with his bootjack, as a
salute in the way of his present calling - that he hadn't found it yet.

     Well sir!  Boots left the Elmses when his time was up, and Master Harry,
he went down to the old lady's at York, which old lady would have given that
child the teeth out of her head (if she had had any), she was so wrapped up
in him.  What does that Infant do, - for Infant you may call him and be
within the mark, - but cut away from that old lady's with his Norah, on a
expedition to go to Gretna Green and be married!

     Sir, Boots was at this identical Holly-Tree Inn (having left it several
times since to better himself, but always come back through one thing or
another), when, one summer afternoon, the coach drives up, and out of the
coach gets them two children.  The Guard says to our Governor, "I don't quite
make out these little passengers, but the young gentleman's words was, that
they was to be brought here." The young gentleman gets out; hands his lady
out; gives the Guard something for himself; says to our Governor, "We're to
stop here tonight, please.  Sitting-room and two bedrooms will be required.
Chops and cherry pudding for two!" and tucks her, in her little sky-blue
mantle, under his arm, and walks into the house much bolder than Brass.

     Boots leaves me to judge what the amazement of that establishment was,
when these two tiny creatures all alone by themselves was marched into the
Angel, - much more so, when he, who had seen them without their seeing him,
give the Governor his views of the expedition they was upon.  "Cobbs," says
the Governor, "if this is so, I must set off myself to York, and quiet their
friends' minds.  In which case you must keep your eye upon 'em, and humour
'em, till I come back.  But before I take these measures, Cobbs, I should
wish you to find from themselves whether your opinions is correct." "Sir, to
you," says Cobbs, "that shall be done directly."

     So Boots goes up-stairs to the Angel, and there he finds Master Harry,
on a e-normous sofa, - immense at any time, but looking like the Great Bed
of Ware, compared with him, - a drying the eyes of Miss Norah with his
pocket-hankecher.  Their little legs was entirely off the ground, of course,
and it really is not possible for Boots to express to me how small them
children looked.

     "It's Cobbs!  It's Cobbs!" cries Master Harry, and comes running to
him, and catching hold of his hand.  Miss Norah comes running to him on
t'other side and catching hold of his t'other hand, and they both jump for
joy.

     "I see you a getting out, sir," says Cobbs.  "I thought it was you.
I thought I couldn't be mistaken in your height and figure.  What's the
object of your journey, sir? - Matrimonial?"

     "We are going to be married, Cobbs, at Gretna Green," returned the boy.
"We have run away on purpose.  Norah has been in rather low spirits, Cobbs;
but she'll be happy, now we have found you to be our friend."

     "Thank you, sir, and thank you, miss," says Cobbs, "for your good
opinion.  Did you bring any luggage with you, sir?"

     If I will believe Boots when he gives me his word and honour upon it,
the lady had got a parasol, a smelling-bottle, a round and a half of cold
buttered toast, eight peppermint drops, and a hairbrush, - seemingly a
doll's.  The gentleman had got about half a dozen yards of string, a knife,
three or four sheets of writing-paper folded up surprising small, a orange,
and a Chaney mug with his name upon it.

     "What may be the exact nature of your plans, sir?" says Cobbs.

     "To go on," replied the boy, - which the courage of that boy was
something wonderful! - "in the morning, and be married to-morrow."

     "Just so, sir," says Cobbs.  "Would it meet your views, sir, if I was
to accompany you?"

     When Cobbs said this, they both jumped for joy again, and cried out, "O
yes, yes, Cobbs!  Yes!"

     "Well, sir," says Cobbs.  "If you will excuse my having the freedom to
give an opinion, what I should recommend would be this.  I'm acquainted with
a pony, sir, which, put in a pheayton that I could borrow, would take you and
Mrs. Harry Walmers, Junior, (myself driving, if you approved,) to the end of
your journey in a very short space of time.  I am not altogether sure, sir,
that this pony will be at liberty to-morrow, but even if you had to wait over
to-morrow for him, it might be worth your while.  As to the small account
here, sir, in case you was to find yourself running at all short, that don't
signify; because I'm a part proprietor of this inn, and it could stand over."

     Boots assures me that when they clapped their hands, and jumped for
joy again, and called him "Good Cobbs!" and "Dear Cobbs!" and bent across him
to kiss one another in the delight of their confiding hearts, he felt himself
the meanest rascal for deceiving 'em that ever was born.

     "Is there anything you want just at present, sir?" says Cobbs, mortally
ashamed of himself.

     "We should like some cakes after dinner," answered Master Harry, folding
his arms, putting out one leg, and looking straight at him, "and two apples,
- and jam.  With dinner we should like to have toast-and-water.  But Norah
has always been accustomed to half a glass of currant wine at dessert.  And
so have I."

     "It shall be ordered at the bar, sir," says Cobbs; and away he went.

     Boots has the feeling as fresh upon him at this minute of speaking as
he had then, that he would far rather have had it out in half a dozen rounds
with the Governor, than have combined with him; and that he wished with all
his heart there was an impossible place where those two babies could make an
impossible marriage, and live impossibly happy ever afterwards.  However, as
it couldn't be, he went into the Governor's plans, and the Governor set off
for York in half an hour.

     The way in which the women of that house - without exception - every one
of 'em - married and single - took to that boy when they heard the story,
Boots considers surprising.  It was as much as he could do to keep 'em from
dashing into the room and kissing him.  They climbed up all sorts of places,
at the risk of their lives, to look at him through a pane of glass.  They
were seven deep at the keyhole.  They was out of their minds about him and
his bold spirit.

     In the evening, Boots went into the room to see how the runaway couple
was getting on.  The gentleman was on the window-seat, supporting the lady
in his arms.  She had tears upon her face, and was lying, very tired and half
asleep, with her head upon his shoulder.

     "Mrs. Harry Walmers, Junior, fatigued, sir?" says Cobbs.

     "Yes, she is tired, Cobbs; but she is not used to be away from home, and
she has been in low spirits again.  Cobbs, do you think you could bring a
biffin, please?"

     "I ask your pardon, sir," says Cobbs.  "What was it you - ?"

     "I think a Norfolk biffin would rouse her, Cobbs.  She is very fond of
them."

     Boots withdrew in search of the required restorative, and when he
brought it in, the gentleman handed it to the lady, and fed her with a spoon,
and took a little himself; the lady being heavy with sleep, and rather cross.
"What should you think, sir," says Cobbs, "of a chamber candlestick?" The
gentleman approved; the chambermaid went first, up the great staircase; the
lady, in her sky-blue mantle, followed, gallantly escorted by the gentleman;
the gentleman embraced her at the door, and retired to his own apartment,
where Boots softly locked him up.

     Boots couldn't but feel with increased acuteness what a base deceiver
he was, when they consulted him at breakfast (they had ordered sweet
milk-and-water, and toast and currant jelly, overnight), about the pony.  It
really was as much as he could do, he don't mind confessing to me, to look
them two young things in the face, and think what a wicked old father of lies
he had grown up to be.  Howsomever, he went on a lying like a Trojan about
the pony.  He told 'em that it did so unfort'nately happen that the pony was
half clipped, you see, and that he couldn't be taken out in that state, for
fear it should strike to his inside.  But that he'd be finished clipping in
the course of the day, and that tomorrow morning at eight o'clock the
pheayton would be ready.  Boots's view of the whole case, looking back upon
it in my room, is, that Mrs. Harry Walmers, Junior, was beginning to give in.
She hadn't had her hair curled when she went to bed, and she didn't seem
quite up to brushing it herself, and its getting in her eyes put her out.
But nothing put out Master Harry.  He sat behind his breakfast-cup, a tearing
away at the jelly, as if he had been his own father.

     After breakfast, Boots is inclined to consider that they drawed
soldiers, - at least, he knows that many such was found in the fireplace, all
on horseback.  In the course of the morning, Master Harry rang the bell, -
it was surprising how that there boy did carry on, - and said, in a sprightly
way, "Cobbs, is there any good walks in this neighbourhood?"

     "Yes, sir," says Cobbs.  "There's Love Lane."

     "Get out with you, Cobbs!" - that was that there boy's expression, -
"you're joking."

     "Begging your pardon, sir," says Cobbs, "there really is Love Lane.
And a pleasant walk it is, and proud shall I be to show it to yourself and
Mrs. Harry Walmers, Junior."

     "Norah, dear," said Master Harry, "this is curious.  We really ought to
see Love Lane.  Put on your bonnet, my sweetest darling, and we will go there
with Cobbs."

     Boots leaves me to judge what a Beast he felt himself to be, when that
young pair told him, as they all three jogged along together, that they had
made up their minds to give him two thousand guineas a year as head gardener,
on accounts of his being so true a friend to 'em.  Boots could have wished
at the moment that the earth would have opened and swallered him up, he felt
so mean, with their beaming eyes a looking at him, and believing him.  Well,
sir, he turned the conversation as well as he could, and he took 'em down
Love Lane to the water-meadows, and there Master Harry would have drownded
himself in half a moment more, a getting out a water-lily for her, - but
nothing daunted that boy.  Well, sir, they was tired out.  All being so new
and strange to 'em, they was tired as tired could be.  And they laid down on
a bank of daisies, like the children in the wood, leastways meadows, and fell
asleep.

     Boots don't know - perhaps I do, - but never mind, it don't signify
either way - why it made a man fit to make a fool of himself to see them
two pretty babies a lying there in the clear still sunny day, not dreaming
half so hard when they was asleep as they done when they was awake.  But
Lord!  when you come to think of yourself, you know, and what a game you have
been up to ever since you was in your own cradle, and what a poor sort of a
chap you are, and how it's always either Yesterday with you, or else
To-morrow and never To-day, that's where it is!

     Well, sir, they woke up at last, and then one thing was getting pretty
clear to Boots, namely, that Mrs. Harry Walmerses, Junior's, temper was on
the move.  When Master Harry took her round the waist, she said he "teased
her so"; and when he says, "Norah, my young May Moon, your Harry tease you?"
she tells him, "Yes; and I want to go home!"

     A biled fowl and baked bread-and-butter pudding brought Mrs. Walmers up
a little; but Boots could have wished, he must privately own to me, to have
seen her more sensible of the woice of love, and less abandoning of herself
to currants.  However, Master Harry, he kept up, and his noble heart was as
fond as ever.  Mrs. Walmers turned very sleepy about dusk, and began to cry.
Therefore, Mrs. Walmers went off to bed as per yesterday; and Master Harry
ditto repeated.

[See The Walmers: Mrs. Walmers turned very sleepy about dusk, and began to
cry.]


     About eleven or twelve at night comes back the Governor in a chaise,
along with Mr. Walmers and a elderly lady.  Mr. Walmers looked amused and
very serious, both at once, and says to our missis, "We are much indebted to
you, ma'am, for your kind care of our little children, which we can never
sufficiently acknowledge.  Pray ma'am, where is my boy?" Our missis says,
"Cobbs has the dear child in charge, sir.  Cobbs, show Forty!" Then he says
to Cobbs, "Ah, Cobbs!  I am glad to see you.  I understood you was here!" and
Cobbs says, "Yes, sir.  Your most obedient, sir."

     I may be surprised to hear Boots say it, perhaps; but Boots assures me
that his heart beat like a hammer, going up-stairs.  "I beg you pardon, sir,"
says he, while unlocking the door; "I hope you are not angry with Master
Harry.  For Master Harry is a fine boy, sir, and will do you credit and
honour." And Boots signifies to me, that, if the fine boy's father had
contradicted him in the daring state of mind in which he then was, he thinks
he should have "fetched him a crack," and taken the consequences.

     But Mr. Walmers only says, "No, Cobbs.  No, my good fellow.  Thank
you!" And, the door being opened, goes in.

     Boots goes in too, holding the light, and he sees Mr. Walmers go up to
the bedside, bend gently down and kiss the little sleeping face.  Then he
stands looking at it for a minute, looking wonderfully like it (they do say
he ran away with Mrs. Walmers); and then he gently shakes the little
shoulder.

     "Harry, my dear boy!  Harry!"

     Master Harry starts up and looks at him.  Looks at Cobbs too.  Such is
the honour of that mite, that he looks at Cobbs, to see whether he has
brought him into trouble.

     "I am not angry, my child.  I only want you to dress yourself and come
home."

     "Yes, pa."

     Master Harry dresses himself quickly.  His breast begins to swell when
he has nearly finished, and it swells more and more as he stands, at last,
a looking at his father: his father standing a looking at him, the quiet
image of him.

     "Please may I" - the spirit of that little creetur, and the way he kept
his rising tears down! - "please dear pa - may I - kiss Norah before I go?"

     "You may, my child."

     So he takes Master Harry in his hand, and Boots leads the way with the
candle, and they come to that other bedroom, where the elderly lady is seated
by the bed, and poor little Mrs. Harry Walmers, Junior, is fast asleep.
There the father lifts the child up to the pillow, and he lays his little
face down for an instant by the little warm face of poor unconscious little
Mrs. Harry Walmers, Junior, and gently draws it to him, - a sight so touching
to the chambermaids who are peeping through the door, that one of them calls
out, "It's a shame to part 'em!" But this chambermaid was always, as Boots
informs me, a soft-hearted one.  Not that there was any harm in that girl.
Far from it.

     Finally, Boots says, that's all about it.  Mr. Walmers drove away in the
chaise, having hold of Master Harry's hand.  The elderly lady and Mrs. Harry
Walmers, Junior, that was never to be (she married a Captain long afterwards,
and died in India), went off next day.  In conclusion, Boots puts it to me
whether I hold with him in two opinions; firstly, that there are not many
couples on their way to be married who are half as innocent of guile as those
two children; secondly, that it would be a jolly good thing for a great many
couples on their way to be married, if they could only be stopped in time,
and brought back separately.