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- Program Poetry
- by Anonymous
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- 'Twas the night before implementation and all through the house,
- Not a program was working not even a browse.
- The programmers hung by their tubes in despair,
- with hopes that a miracle would soon come there.
- The users were nestled all snug in their beds,
- while visions of inquiries danced in their heads.
- When out in the machine room there arose such a clatter,
- I sprang from my desk to see what was the matter.
- And what to my wondering eyes should appear,
- but a super duper programmer with a six-pack of beer.
- His resume glowed with experience so rare,
- he turned out code with a bit-pusher's flair.
- More rapid than eagles, his programs they came,
- as he cursed and muttered, and called them by name,
- "On update! On add! On inquiry! On delete!
- On Batch jobs! On closing! On functions complete!"
- His eyes were glazed-over, with fingers nimble and lean,
- from weekends and nights in front of a screen.
- A wink of his eye, and a twitch of his head,
- soon gave me to know I had nothing to dread.
- He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work,
- turning specs into code; and then turned with a jerk;
- Laying his fingers upon the ENTER key,
- the system came up and worked perfectly.
- The updates updated; the deletes, they deleted;
- the inquiries inquired, and closings completed.
- He tested each whistle, and tested each bell,
- with nary an abend, and all had gone well.
- The system was finished, the tests were concluded.
- The users' last changes were even included.
- And the users exclaimed with snarls and a taunt,
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- "IT'S JUST WHAT WE ASKED FOR, BUT NOT WHAT WE WANT !"
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