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great-minds
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Quotations from 1996
"I hate reality, but, you know, where else can you get a good steak dinner?"
-- Woody Allen
[]
"I don't want to keep proving myself to the world anymore. I've done that."
-- Cindy Crawford
[]
"I'm not a doomsday philosopher, but if you want to talk about what's really
tough, I can't respect a society that can't keep guns out of schools. I don't
care if you've gotta put 30 adults with guns down there to do it."
-- Jack Nicholson, on what's wrong with America.
[]
"People don't realize you can die from Hepatitis A, although you don't very
often."
-- Elizabeth Murano, Shasta County director of public nursing.
[]
"Cold and white."
-- Prince Charles, in frosty response to a British reporter on the slopes in
Switzerland, "How's the snow, sir?"
[]
"As a media megastar, I now travel all over the world. Let me say this to
doubts about the existence of God -- fly Air Sudan. If you arrive safely, there
has to be."
-- Roger Royle, English vicar.
[]
"The Republicans must love families, they have so many of them. I'm offering a
reward to any Republican candidate who's left his wife for an older woman."
-- James Carville, Democratic Party strategist.
[]
"No way! Most of our parents were married."
-- Argus Hamilton of Los Angeles, commenting on a federal survey detailing
illiteracy in the United States.
[]
"I am fascinated by Courtney Love, but the same way I am by someone who's got
Tourette's syndrome walking in Central Park."
-- Madonna
[]
"If education fails, what's going to happen to the population that's
exploding?"
-- San Jose State University President Robert Caret
[]
"Having Al D'Amato head up an ethics investigation is a little like getting Bob
Dornan to head a mental health task force."
-- Al Franken
[]
"I've always thought it was arrogant to write about yourself, particularly when
you're still alive."
-- American Indian leader Russell Means, commenting on his autobiography.
[]
"Some people compare me to John Kennedy, especially when I play under the
president's desk during meetings."
-- George Stephanopoulos, White House adviser.
[]
"If they are from South Carolina, I'm sure they are competent."
-- Sen. Strom Thurmond, 93, of South Carolina, when asked his opinion of Hootie
and the Blowfish.
[]
"Sometimes there'll just be better places to live than a place with low wealth
and high needs. If you're living in an area with a bad school, you move to a
place where there's a better school."
-- Lamar Alexander, candidate for the GOP presidential nomination, explaining
his ideas on what parents of children who attend poorly funded schools should
do.
[]
"She told me, `Sir, New Mexico, old Mexico, it doesn't matter. I understand
it's a territory, but you still have to go through your nation's Olympic
committee.' "
-- New Mexico resident Wade Miller, recounting a geographic mix-up he
encountered on the phone with a ticket agent for the Summer Olympics in Atlanta.
[]
"We know that women love to clean."
-- Yuri Glazkov, deputy commander of Russia's Gagarin Cosmonaut Training Center,
on why American astronaut Shannon Lucid will be welcome aboard the Mir space
station.
[]
"Feburary" and "Noverber."
-- Dan Quayle's spelling of the months on his home page.
[]
"I don't get out much anymore. I don't get asked out much anymore. It's amazing
how many people beat you at golf now that you're no longer president."
-- George Bush
[]
"I know (Phil Gramm) has a Ph.D. in economics, but you can't sound like you
just walked out of the woods in `Deliverance' and not scare people."
-- Don Imus on Phil Gramm's presidential nomination campaign.
[]
"We know it's not good for kids. But a lot of other things aren't good. Some
would say milk's not good."
-- Bob Dole, on tobacco. Tobacco companies contributed $385,000 to his campaign
by June 1996.
[]
"It's all about the future. That's where we're headed in this country."
-- Bob Dole
[]
"It's the evil of two lessers."
-- Michael Moore on the choice between Bill Clinton and Bob Dole.
[]
"All white people, I don't believe, are intolerant. That's why I say I love the
individuals, but I don't like the race."
-- Rep. Barbara-Rose Collins, D-Mich.
[]
"If he's convicted, the judge should drop the theft charge and send him away
for being stupid."
-- Clark Johnson, who plays Detective Meldrick Lewis, of the theft suspect who
stumbled onto the set of "Homicide" and surrendered to actors.
[]
"So, have you ever been kissed by a woman before?"
-- Tonya Harding to 81-year-old Alice Olson, whom Harding revived with
mouth-to-mouth resuscitation.
[]
"Tell her that I love her. And that if she loves me, she should wear something
green at her next press conference. I shall be watching and hoping."
-- Libyan dictator Moammar Gadhafi telling an American reporter of his love for
State Department spokeswoman Margaret Tutwiler.
[]
"Histrionics are against him."
-- John Tesh, NBC Olympics commentator, assessing a gymnast's chance for a
medal.
[]
"Another birthday."
-- Frank Sinatra, when asked what he wanted for his 81st birthday.