'Ecstasy opens up a direct link between myself and God,' answered Brother Bartholemew in answer to my question about the drug's effect. I was interviewing a Benedictine monk, two Zen monks and a rabbi who believe that Ecstasy is useful for the practice of religion.
Brother Bartholemew explained that the object of prayer is communication with God, but there are so many blocks in the way - the internal dialogue, distractions and losing faith in oneself - that this is seldom achieved. Although he only takes Ecstasy two or three times a year, the experience makes prayer easier at other times. It has helped restore his faith, and has also provided him with valuable insights, such as a very deep comprehension of divine passion. He has never lost sight of this insight which remains 'as a reservoir' which he recalls at times when prayer is difficult.
So why does Ecstasy have such a specific effect on him? 'You should only take it in a place which is quiet and serene and when you have a close emotional bond with the others in your company, with everyone united in trying to pray. Otherwise there is a danger of squandering the experience by being trapped in euphoric feelings rather than reaching into a spiritual realm.' When asked about raves, he replied: 'The experience is not suitable for hedonists such as teenage ravers.'
The rabbi had more positive views about youth drug use. 'Traditional religions have lost the ability to provide followers with mystical experiences. Instead, young people are far more likely to have such experiences while on LSD and Ecstasy.' Most religious leaders, he said, were against the use of drugs because of their own ignorance. 'If priests really want to understand young people they should take drugs themselves. Then they would learn that MDMA can produce the same quality and potential value as other mystical experiences.' But is taking a drug really as effective as years of devotion? 'It can be seen as cheating, but it gets you to the same place.'
My third interview was with Bertrand, a Rinzai Zen abbot in his early seventies. He started taking Ecstasy while he was a Zen student undertaking Koans, tasks such as understanding the sound of one hand clapping. 'My master would give me such a task, and tell me not to come back until I understood it. Normally this took hours or even days of contemplation, and even then I would be told to go away and try again. But on Ecstasy the answers came swiftly and clearly. My master was most impressed, though I never told him the secret of my success.' Bertrand felt that Ecstasy had genuinely helped him on his rise to becoming an abbot, but admitted he once misused the drug. He was teaching a large group of students, neatly bowed before him in their black robes, while under the influence. 'I feel no energy from you,' he scolded, 'You are like rows of corpses' - an honest comment, but one that did not help the students, rather it made them feel put down.
Bertrand had never experienced dancing on Ecstasy, but he was curious and accepted my invitation to a party. He found the music unbearable at first, but eventually his face glowed and he announced 'This is meditation - to be truly in the moment and not in your head!' He later explained that the object of meditation was to cease the internal dialogue and yet be fully aware of what was happening, and that is exactly what the dancers were doing.
Next morning Bertrand said he had a revelation: his school of Zen concentrated too much on contraction such as disciplined meditation, but what was really needed by most students was the opposite, to let go and expand in the way he had just witnessed at the party. Two weeks later he told me that he had just given the best meditation course of his life as a result: instead of strict discipline he encouraged the students to open up and have fun.
Lastly, I interviewed a Soto Zen monk, also a teacher of meditation, called Pari, who said that his school of Zen was the only one that acknowledged the value of drugs: his master had used LSD and MDMA. 'Ecstasy is a wonderful tool for teaching. For example, I had a very keen student who tried hard to meditate but never managed; Ecstasy allowed him to do so without the 'trying' blocking his efforts. That one experience helped him to make fast progress, and he had since been ordained a monk.'
Asked about how Ecstasy helps achieve enlightenment, Pari made this analogy: 'It is like a climber walking in the mountains who is lost in the fog and unable to see the peak he has set out to climb. All of a sudden the fog clears and he experiences the reality of the peak, and gains a sense of direction. Even though the fog moves in again, and it is still a long, hard climb, this glimpse is usually an enormous help and encouragement.'
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