Why do my friends and family tell me how awful things are
going to be when I travel alone? None of them have even
gone traveling! How bad are hostels, anyway? Do I seem
like a total flake that I can't take care of myself? Please
tell me that it's THEIR problem, not mine.
[There are 20 posts - the latest was added on Sun 16 May, 8:38]
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Hi there, just fashed across your post and I have to tell
you, I'm a single female travelling and all I can say
is...Have fun enjoy life embrace every new situation like it
was your last and your life is going to be soo much more
meaningful. feel free to chat about experiences.
Cheers and happy travelling
Sarah.
I too get sick of people telling me how dangerous and stupid
it is for a woman to travel alone: I've travelled on my own
several times and while it hasn't been all plain sailing I
can't recall a single really threatenig incident that's
happenned to me. (In fact, the one time when I felt I really
was in danger was when travelling with someone else). Sure,
there are potential hazards connected with being a single
female traveller but I reckon they're seriously exaggerated,
and more to the point, people ignore the benefits of being a
woman travelling alone. For example, I'ce often found
myself being invited to people's homes and generally being
"looked after" in a way I'm sure wouldn't happen if I was a
single male or if I was with someone else. I remember a few
years ago there was a very interesting article in the
"Guardian" about a British woman who was killed in Thailand
(I think): what the article was saying was that while far
more male than female travellers are killed every year, the
media pay much more attention when the victim is a woman,
even though, statistically speaking, there are far fewer of
them.
So I would say, don't listen to the merchants of doom and
just go and have a great time!
I travelled throughout Europe alone last summer not really
by choice, but my traveling companions bailed at the last
minute and I decided to go ahead anyway. In general I found
that if you use your head you can avoid most problems before
they even arise. One of the bonuses of travelling alone is
that people are more likely to invite you to join them for a
while and then you go your own way when you ant. Also I
found hostels never turn down a woman travelling alone even
if that means you have to sleep in a hallway. Just be smart
and look out for yourself even if that may require being a
little abrupt at times!
I'm probably way older than you but even when you've logged
years of experience, in career, travel and raising a
family, people will still say these negative things to you.
lately I retaken up travel with my young teens which
although we are a small group, they do not wish to
accompany me everywhere hence I find myself solo in
numerous situations in Mexico. I try to keep my antennae
very tuned but generally I find the possibilities endless
for enjoyment. I have found out the 'hard' way that you
need to keep your head up but the gains far outway the
risks. wen
that they are jealous...at least that's what I try to tell
myself! Unfortunately it begins to wear you down, as you
mentioned it seems as though they think we are flakes! I
leave in one day and my greatest relief will be to get away
from all of the comments about danger. Good luck and have
fun proving them wrong! : ) Heather
i came to korea shortly after the asian bubble burst.
just my luck, two weeks before i left, there was an
interview on the local radio with two teachers who had just
returned from a rotten year.
i had people who had never left our little section of
canada (except to go cross border shopping in new england)
tell me that it was a dangerous country, and why was i
being so stupid?
i'm leaving after 13 months, and i think i'm going to miss
korea more than i missed home!
so--ignore people who only get news from newspapers.
good luck!
Firstly, your friends and family are, most likely, genuinely concerned for your welfare and safety. That aside, we know that
most people are just not very adventurous in life, and spend most of it doing those things which are safe, sure, and familiar.
How many of your family or friends go skydiving, scuba diving, mountain climbing, bungee jumping,hang gliding, etc.?
None, you say? And when they go on vacation, do they stay at the hotel on the beach, take a cruise, drive to a cabin in the
mountains? Remember, the average person does those latter things above; those things which are non-threatening. Travel to
South America, Africa, Indonesia? Why the people in those places don't speak out language, they have Pagan religions, and use
strange money ---- and those Latinos and Aficans, they steal from everybody ----, etc. Well, you know, you just have to put
all that in a bag and set it on a table somewhere, and then go and do what moves your own blood! Respect their lifestyles, but
demand respect for yours, as well. We all know that the best experiences are those which have been a little scary, made you a
little nervous, drove up the adrenaline, gave us a big rush ---. It's called LIVING! Some are too afraid to live. It's your life,
do with it what you wish, but don't deprive others of theirs.
...and it sucks. I've been on three solo ventures (India,
Sri Lanka, Mauritius) and am off to Nepal in 2 weeks for
another. Just today my colleagues asked "why on earth would
you want to go alone?" I wanted to say "why do you feel
that you have to go with someone every time you travel?" I
get a lot out of travelling on my own and I enjoy meeting
new people when I am on a solo journey. The fact that I can
do anything or go anyone is also great.
~
I always come back feeling independent and I like knowing
that I can take care of myself.
A lot of people would not want to do anything at all on
their own, and cannot understand that others feel
differently. There's no point in trying to make them
understand, as they do not have the imagination to see what
you see: all they see is being lonely, afraid, bored with
their own company. You won't change people's minds by
telling them what you are GOING to do, but you might open
their minds a little by telling them, afterwards, what you
have done/seen/experienced.
Can you believe I get all this grief and I'm only going to
the East Coast to see some baseball games? I'm planning
another trip to Europe in Sept., gee, I can harldy wait for
the reaction then (yes, I was being sarcastic).
You gals are right though, I get this from people who only
go to the mall. It's just so irritating!
solo I have travelled the world alone and have never had
any problems, even while hitchhiking alone in Alaska for 6
weeks alone.You have some wonderful experiences and don't
need to please others.
I've travelled on my own twice and plan to do it again this
year. I wouldn't have it any other way.
The people warning you about the dangers, etc of travelling
on your own are naturally concerned for your welfare, but
at the same time, they're talking about their own fears.
And yes, a lot of people won't travel alone, because of
loneliness, etc.
But I definitely recommend it!! Listen to what you want,
and follow it. You'll never regret it
Good luck and happy travels!
I love travelling solo. For 4 years, in Kenya, Cambodia,
Burma, India, Australia etc... etc.. I started when I was
21 y.o. It was a bit scary the first time but soooo greaat!
Have fun! If you take good care of yourself, and smile, and
be honest.. Karma Karma, nothing bad can happened! Enjoy
it!
For those of you who have seen the movie "The Truman Show"--
do you remember the scene where Truman goes to the travel
agency to try to get a ticket "out"? Hanging on the walls
of the travel agency were posters of all the things that
could go wrong if you travel--plane wrecks, terrorists, etc.
Sometimes I think people who say these things when we get
ready to travel want us to live in Truman's world,
completely protected (in a false sense) from anything new
and different. You go, girl!
I haven't been able (time & money constraints) to do the several month trip like most people here do. So another reaction I get, besides the 'why would you go alone', is "it's a waste to fly so far for such a short time" (last couple of trips have been 10-day ventures to UK) - even though from where I live (Toronto), it takes just about as long to fly to Mexico, and people do that for a week all the time....
That being said, you can see sooooo much more in the same amount of time travelling alone - you just decide & go, and if something is only worth an hour, you only spend an hour, no need to discuss it. When I tell people how much I saw & did my last time in London, it seems like I spent more like a month there instead of a week (going in November also helped, mind you...)
I can really empathize with you, Wendy. I am in the same situation as you are right now and had the same feelings as you. My parents are trying every tactic to get me not to travel alone. I have a deep-rooted need to travel to a Spanish-speaking country for several months alone and am currently planning a trip. There is no way that my parents will truly understand my need to do this but this is something that is very important to me. I'm sure that you're family/friends are quite concerned about your wellbeing and this is understandable. However, this is no reason to stay home and not fulfill your dream. You must go for it and do what will make you happy. You are the one who must live with your decision either way.
Good luck!!!
It is great to hear words of encouragement, and i have to add my own, too!! I am about to take of indefinitely from my home in Sydney to...whereever i end up (after a few months backpacking thru Europe) and i have heard all the disapproving tones in peoples voices... but stuff them!!! I am looking forward to exploring the world on my own, developing my independence, meeting new people and working out who i want to be. I think the best way to do this will be to spend some time away from people who know me, where there is always a preconcieved idea of who you are supposed to be, and how you are supposed to behave. GO GIRLS!!!
I love to travel solo in Mexico and used to get flack from
a co-worker who had never been outside of Canada. I would
shut him up by asking if he had been there or anywhere, or
saying after all his cautions, 'Oh, thanks, and I'll try to
have a good time too!' Ignore these stupid people, maybe
one day they will expand their minds and geographical
experience.
I have travelled alone across Latin Ameria, SE Asia and
Europe and have had realms of fantastic experiences I know I
wouldn't have had if I were not female and a single
traveller. You have the ultimate freedom - you can do what
you want, go where you want and even BE who you want (being
an imaginary VIP can open enormous amounts of doors if
you're in the mood!). I cannot recommend it higher. Sure,
shit happens, but you come through it and feel even stronger
after. All part of the adventure!
Isn't it funny that co-workers and friends gape and gawk in awe when you tell them that you're off to some fabulous destination by yourself. Personally, I find that most people actually seem to show admiration for me when I tell them I'm traveling on my own. Family is another matter altogether though -- my poor mother has a fit every time I tell her I'm venturing off solo again.