foreign lands and foreign loves!!?*

This topic was created by wendywoo
[Mon 22 Feb, 6:46 Tasmanian Standard Time]

Out of interest in the odds of my trip to NZ this week
being a hit or miss(in the romance department!)...may I
ask.. has anyone ever - well I guess this happens every
second of the day - Have you fell for a lovely man in a
foreign land and then torn yourself away to do a sensible
thing like return home for a few months and then yearned
for this man and set off on a wild chase to catch
him...then did it work, was it the same, was it the best
thing to do? do you regret it?. Help! I need some
encouragement here, my chase starts in 3 days and am I
scared or what!!!
best wishes
scared!

[There are 16 posts - the latest was added on Sun 28 March, 10:55]

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  1. no useful advice but... Added by: kiwi
    [Timestamp: Mon 22 Feb, 8:01 Tasmanian Standard Time]

    if you must choose a place to follow a man to, i reacon NZ
    is one of the best. I live here and love it and would never
    live anywhere else. Good luck.



  2. Who can say? Added by: Helen Brown (freespirit@gn.apc.org)
    [Timestamp: Mon 22 Feb, 8:55 Tasmanian Standard Time]

    People mostly seem to think it's not a good idea, but I
    don't know.
    It depends so much on you and him and what makes the
    relationship tick.



  3. Fez.............. Added by: dahlia.........
    [Timestamp: Mon 22 Feb, 13:18 Tasmanian Standard Time]

    I am a single female, 40 now, and have loved travelling
    alone all my life. I always love travelling this way, and
    have been very lucky considering the remote places I've
    travelled to. I enjoy photography, and always keep an
    introspective travel journal.
    In September, I was in Fez, Morocco. As I don't speak
    Arabic, Berber or French, I found it nearly impossible to
    converse with people (it is rare to find English speaking
    people, let alone Americans off season). I met a wonderful
    tall, blonde Frenchman 7 years my junior who was staying at
    my hotel. He was in Morocco on business in the computer
    hardware bussiness- then off to China for 3 months for an
    installation. He was shy, and we had a wonderful few days
    together. No, I did not chase him, but I dried the roses he
    bought for me, and wrote a lengthy chapter in my diary.
    It's for the best, I my family all lives in Massachusetts
    and I would have missed them all terribly. My memories will
    remain forever glorious!



  4. I hope you... Added by: Stacey
    [Timestamp: Mon 22 Feb, 16:28 Tasmanian Standard Time]

    have your eyes wide open, have a return ticket or money for
    one. I also hope the guy is not a blonde guy called Carl
    who lives in Auckland. If so, he's my flatmate and he is
    well known amongst his friends for doing such things. Apart
    from these things- go forth, have fun and keep safe.



  5. Best of luck to you Added by: Beth (.....)
    [Timestamp: Tue 23 Feb, 0:43 Tasmanian Standard Time]

    Stacey...does Carl play rugby by any chance????
    To Wendywoo....when I went to Australia I fell for my
    bestfriend and it broke my heart to leave because he is the
    greatest guy who ever lived...I swore that I would go back
    after University and see him but he beat me to it....he is
    coming here in four days....Go for it anf hope for the best
    ..if it was really that great that you can't forget him it
    won't hurt to go either way....if it works out then you will
    have an amazing relationship and if not at aleast you will
    know that it wasn't what you thought and will be able to
    move on after you deal with the pain!!GOOD LUCK!!I wish you
    happy travels and have my fingers crossed for you



  6. thanx! Added by: wendywoo
    [Timestamp: Tue 23 Feb, 5:24 Tasmanian Standard Time]

    I feel encouraged if not still insane!
    When I left NZ I planned that my experience with this chap
    would just fizzle away and I'd get over him, I kick myself
    sooo much for feeling the way I do about him now, I think
    about all the horrible things he could be as a person that
    I did not see, that he was just one of those guys out for a
    good time with foreign girls who shoot through his town!
    BUT.....then I could'nt imagine it! I'm not so naive as to
    shack up with one of those losers.........but then if I am
    so stupid and did not realise...well his past is coming
    back to haunt him and he'll learn a lesson or two!
    I can't wait for either situation, a kiss and make up or a
    painful rejection........at least then I can move on!
    a week from now I'll know and I'll perhaps post the turn
    out on the end of this post!
    cheers!



  7. So Wendy woo... Added by: Greta
    [Timestamp: Tue 23 Feb, 11:40 Tasmanian Standard Time]

    What part of NZ are you going to come to? I was thinking
    that if you got stuck I might be able to help you out. I
    live in Auckland (plus I need an extra female for our
    indoor netball team for the next few weeks).



  8. go for it! Added by: Aline (aline@interchange.ubc.ca)
    [Timestamp: Wed 24 Feb, 7:15 Tasmanian Standard Time]

    hey, I'm french and last summer, in the south of france, I
    met this amazing aussie guy that I immediately fell in love
    with. This summer I am going to Sydney to see him, I really
    hope it will go well because he doesn't know I'm coming.
    Good luck to you, I'm sure he will be very happy to see you



  9. to Aline Added by: wendywoo
    [Timestamp: Wed 24 Feb, 8:21 Tasmanian Standard Time]

    This guy does'nt know I'm coming back to NZ!
    same situation as yourself!
    He'll get the shock of his life...I can't wait...I'll be
    the last person on earth he'll be exspecting to see!
    good luck to you with your aussie guy!
    byeeeeeeeee!



  10. ..to Wendy woo.. Added by: nicole (niktex@canada.com)
    [Timestamp: Wed 24 Feb, 12:15 Tasmanian Standard Time]

    Just thought I would share my storie so you can still see
    that your not alone out there!! We're all behind you
    girlfriend!! :o)
    I spent a year out west ( canadian rockies )alone.
    I came back last august (98) for school, thinking HeY! I'm
    single, I can do what I want when I want and the're ain't no
    "Guy" in my life to distract me from school so I'll just
    finish it reaaally fast and head back out there to travel
    some more...but noooOOOoooooOOooo! the first week I come
    back home ( MOntreal) I meet THE man of my dreams...the man
    I was made for...the man who was made for me! And the minute
    I meet him, we start talking about travelling and he says
    he's leaving in 30 days; moving out WEST! "That's where I
    just came from", I said.
    So he left...moved to Vancouver...I'm 5000km from him...
    we talk on the phone every night, send eachother letters
    every week..
    I seriously though that long distance love would not work
    out..cause I'm a travelling bee , him too, but he's a guy
    and guys have a tendency to fuck around :o) NOT ALL OF THEM,
    but that's there nature! ( hunting the pussey!! ) ANYWAY!
    My point is, it worked out. For now... :o)
    In june I will meet him in Vancouver and we will start our
    journey together..biking around the world!
    good luck girlfriend!
    Give us news!
    niki



  11. Long Distance Sucks Added by: Been There, Done That
    [Timestamp: Wed 24 Feb, 13:55 Tasmanian Standard Time]

    Short term fling-go for it! Long term committment, think carefully.
    1. You're really gonna miss each other when you go home and it'll be a while till one or the other can come over. Can you handle the lonely nights?
    2. A holiday romance and real life romance are very different. Sometimes the person you thought you knew is very different when it comes to day to day (REAL) life.
    3. Who's gonna give up ties to home and move to the other's country? (Unless you're rich and can go back and forth).
    Good luck



  12. The final day Added by: wendyoo
    [Timestamp: Thu 25 Feb, 6:16 Tasmanian Standard Time]

    Thanx for the extra advice, I leave tomorrow.......you know
    I would leave my home in England to live in NZ, no worries,
    if you want to be with someone, distance ain't no object
    and I agree guys do put it around to say, but so do girls!
    I could never see the point of a long distance
    relationship, a total nightmare! that's why I'm heading
    back to NZ, if I want this guy I'll have to be with him all
    the time - This is serious stuff, I'm in Nz for 6 months or
    longer, I don't want a fling, I'm not really a 'fling'
    person - it hurts the soul too much,
    BUT hense fourth into battle!
    Last point, 'holiday romances' - I ain't on a holiday, I'm
    going to live in Nz as a temporary resident, I won't be
    travelling around too much!
    I did not even want to meet a guy when I met this guy in
    NZ' I was quite happy on my own - it was a shock to the
    system! It ain't even an intention to meet guys when
    abroad, theres too much hurt and misunderstandings
    involved; I guess I like to think I'm a free spirit,
    independent and all that!
    time to go!
    cheerio
    and best of luck to all gals in a similar situation!



  13. I understand Added by: tamara (tanlaguer@hotmail.com)
    [Timestamp: Thu 25 Feb, 20:24 Tasmanian Standard Time]

    wendywoo, I think by the time you read this, you'll already
    have left for NZbut I just wanted to let you know how much
    I understand where your coming from. I travelled for four
    months before christmas and for a short time during that
    trip, I met the man of my dreams. We had the most incredible
    times together and promised that we would see each other
    again. We've kept in touch up until a little while ago and
    suddenly, nothing. I'm kind of worried because he was
    travelling too, and another part of me is worried that I wa
    s fooled into believing this was more than just a fling. I
    hope not because I really fell for him and am willing to do
    just about anything to hold down my end of our promise.
    Anyways, let me know how it went, just for inspirations sake
    or to give me something to think about. Thanks and best of
    luck on your trip!!(In every aspect)



  14. Reality Added by: dot
    [Timestamp: Wed 3 March, 4:18 Tasmanian Standard Time]

    Holiday love may sound nice, and trying to make it last is
    a valiant effort, but in the end, one party has GOT to make
    the move. And both have to agree on who is going to do it.
    Wendyoo, I am jealous of your fearlessness. I fell in love
    with a European guy who came to the States on holiday. We
    were both in the same tour group. We flew back and forth
    between the US and Europe, trying to keep it alive. But
    in the end, neither of us wanted to give up the life we
    had in our respective countries. Three and a half years it
    took for me to come to this conclusion (we had a lot of
    disposable income at the time!).
    I hope that things work out for you, since you have made
    the leap of faith that I could never make.
    Good luck!
    Dot



  15. To WendyWoo Added by: beth
    [Timestamp: Tue 9 March, 9:42 Tasmanian Standard Time]

    Let us know how it turns out!



  16. Go for it Added by: Suzi
    [Timestamp: Sun 28 March, 10:55 Tasmanian Standard Time]

    Hi there Wendywoo,
    I met a guy on a Cruise Ship 2 years ago, and although we
    are not together we are excellent friends. I often wonder
    if there could be more but I am to gutless to do anything
    about, but if you think this guy is the ONE just go for it.
    otherwise you may regret it for the rest of your life.




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