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1994-10-16
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Begin1
Intro To Kithe
Cthulu
26
<BOF>
CTHULU'S INTRODUCTION
Good evening, and welcome to the first edition of KiTHE, the MiSTiGRiS
monthly newsletter. I'd imagine we have some explaining to do. Well, some
history comes in handy here, so be sure to read the History of Mist article.
And, for those of you with insatiable cravings for knowledge, check out out
"Ecology of the 604" article, with info on every group ever created in this
lame little area code we like to call home. This newsletter was never
originally intended to be coded, just a small text file. Then it grew. And
grew. It was a very large, ungainly, and hard to manage text file. Then, late
one night, Mavrik decided to code it in the shadowy secrecy of his basement.
In most ways this is better than out inferior text file, so we thanked him,
and I handed myself the responsibility of making the transformation from text
file to e-mag. (arg arg Arg Arg ARG ARG ARG...it has been a frustrating month)
Well, I'm beginning to blather already, so, without further ado, I shall wrap
up this introduction, and move on to the other articles...
In conclusion, blub blub.
-Cthulu, MiSTiGRiS Founder
October 2nd, 1994
blub blub
-PS- Thanks to Mavrik for taking it upon himself to a) set up KitschNet all by
himself, and b) take it upon himself to create this e-maggy sort of thing.
<EOF>
Begin2
WARNING!
Batmud
25
<BOF>
WARNING:
The Surgeon General has determined that over use of Kithe can cause:
Cancer, Liver and Lung Disease, Miscarriages, Unwanted Pregnancies, Low Sperm
Counts, Brain Tissue Damage, Muscular Dystrophy, Forgetfulness, Left-Leg
Paralysis, Internal Hemorrhaging, Geekiness, Carbohydrates Deficiency,
Negligence, Slow Motioness, Bureaucracy, Deforestation, Sexual Atrocities, Lack
of Personality, Inflation, Heavy Machinery Malfunction, Anaphora, Plagiarism,
Lying-to-Congress Disease, Gerrymandering, Incrimination, Schwa Deletion,
Non-Confirmation Syndrome, Defenestration, Illiteracy, Sarcasm, Broccoli
Overcooking, Frequent Defecation, Gossiping, Getting-Laid-on-the-First-Date
Syndrome, Mass Extinction, Ozone Depletion, Global Warming, Gas Leaks,
Hailstorms, Arms Race, Legs Race, Gender Confusion, Transexualism,
Misunderstandings, Gibberish, Boredom, Nausea, Vomiting, Hyperbation,
Hyperbole, Manuscript Loss, Anarchism, Liposuction, Unsuccessful Barbecuing,
Gargling, BONKing, Mavisms, Talking-in-Third-Person Syndrome, Limosine
Overcrowding, Elevator Stalling, Messianism, Low Scoring on Standardized Tests,
PBS Pledging, PTA Joining, PTL Propaganda, S&L Bailouts, Deficit Spending, BL&T
Indigestion, Armpit Enlargement, Proletarianization, Salmon Spawning,
Antidisestablismenterianism, Panic, Disillusionment, Asymmetrical Twins,
Appointment Cancellation, Foreplay Disruption, Stuttering, Dogmatism, Bath Tub
Clogging, Eviction, Infant Mortality, Cryptorchitis, Shistosomaisis, Nepotism,
Baldness, Bad Spelling, Maximum Verbosity, and General Failure in Life.
<Stollen from BatMUD: Batmud.jyu.fi port 2001>
<EOF>
Begin3
Intro to The 418
Eerie
60
<BOF>
eerie's _____
_________,`\ ____,___|`\_| |___33
__, __, __, `\(____- ,_,'_, _______
|' |' |' |' ,\__, `|' _|' |
_|___,`\_,____-__<____,__,'___,__,'\
__, __, `\' ,_ ,' | | _- ,_,'
|' |' | ,__/\ _| _| ,\__, `|
|___,___-,__,____>_________<____,__,'.. from the 418 =)
ok, i dunno if this file will be in the mist pack or in kithe or something,
but bah, i felt like writing it =) anyway, just wanted you to know the 418
guys.. (coz mist is like, 2 acs in the same group.. there are the 604 dudes
and the 418 dudes..) so here they are, in alphabetical order (eh..)
- diamond traveller (dt) -
current affils: slime
diamond traveller (dit for short) was one of the only active members in the
local group slime.. eh.. well, now he's with mist. he's doing pics mostly..
i like his stuff..
- eerie (it's me =) (33) -
past affils: ask, astek, rx, imperial
current affils: relic
oh well.. er.. shit.. i suck.. what am i doing in here.. damn..
- the naughty tycoon (tnt) -
past affils: ask, phobia, astek, liquid (and so many others =)
tnt is a cool logo maker.. he did two logos for my ansis, and he's in the
418 dumb stupid ansi scene since sooo many years. oh well. i love his stuff
too. he's also the editor-in-chief for ace emag.. and, uhm.. his hd crashed
the other week so.. its a bit more difficult for him to do ansi.. and he
ran the last of the xt bbses. (till his hd crashed)
- zoltar (zr) -
current affils: slime
zoltar is the president of that lazy group called slime.. he accepted to
join mist as well, and it's a good thing.. coz his logos are so sweet. he
is also doing pics.. but needs a bit of practice :P
i guess mist gained almost all of the best grouplesses from the 418. anyway
there arent many other decent artists here.. well, lemme count. there's
young, who is in nation.. there's jaydee, who is a fellow relic member..
and there's the extremist who IS GROUPLESS! ah-ha! maybe he will join mist
then? =) (subliminal message).. hm.. and thats about all for the 418..
pathetic, no? (OHH i almost forgot slum dweller.. our local ansi hero.. but
he's like a bit out of the scene no? =)
aaaahwell. you can join all these guys on kitschnet or on my board,
sarcastic toaster 4188490121 which is the proud mistigris canadian
headquarters!!! yeaaahhhhhh!!!!! cooliooooo!!
ok ok i'm outtie
eerie
<EOF>
Begin4
Cthulu's Greets
Cthulu
92
<BOF>
Cthulu's Greets 'n Grunts 'n Groans 'n Grovels:
Cthulu -You know, talking to yourself is a sure sign of insanity. Fish
Grateful Dead -I still say it's Farmer Joe-Jim-Bob's WIFE. Steroid woman.
Wow. You really sound the same on the phone as you type.
White Insanity -I guess it's too late to tell ya, lit guys don't get headers.
D'Artagnan -See? I CAN spell it right...
Magik Elvis -You tricked us into believing that the evil chatboard meet
was a TABMeet! Help me! Help Meeeeeee...
Beatle -TG Forever! er..I mean, Phaze. Yup. Oh, all right, V/X.
Toxic Cockroach -A garbage bag is *not* a proper carrying case for a SNES.
Battered Crow -STOP PEEING IN THE FIRE!
Darkseid -I guess I have to get you some more j0lt now...
Soul of Allusion-Call TST, damn you.
Mavrik -Which issue of GIJoe did you see Cobra Commander's face again?
Nitnatsnoc -Slave to Master Cthulu! MAKE UP YOUR MIND! YES....NOPE...YES
The Mage -Big impovement from "That black white haired guy"
Visionary -Look for other misters in #mist...
Minus -Pablo RULES! Old school Acid pics, yes!
Inquisitor -Is pesty forcing you to write messages again now?
Summonner -MAKE UP YOUR MIND! ONE OR THE OTHER. Ahem.
The Edge -I hate U2 8)
Pestilence -Keep pestering Reznor for me, will ya? 8)
Archangel -Haven't seen much 'o you lately...
LionBird -There. All the titles changed, as you requested.
Skuttlebutt -Remember, more instruments doesn't neccisarily better than
more tracks...
Raidair X -learn from the above. pester him incessantly
Dr. CPU -CALL TST! ARRRRRRGh..when're you gonna do my SE text loader?
Helter -Aw...you took away my leech...<sniff sniff>
(AHa! suddenly got it back!)
The Narccissist -Hey, Chico! Don't make fun of my squid lantern..sniff sniff
Paintball paintball rah rah rah
Livewire -Stop having such a HAPPY life..sheesh...
Tzeentch -I want to hit you on the head with foam 2covered pipes 8)
M0D -Generic Ususper name! That's what I say!
Eoanya -blah halb arg gra j0lt neck yum evil vila
Etana -Tail-piercing? eW...
Questor -You quit Coven? awww... your DG pic looks like Contra Bass
Zoltar -good fonts...er...as for the pics...well...*cough*
Diamond Traveller-ook. say something. embrace KiTSCH.
The Naughty Tycoon-where did you get that handle, anyway?
Eerie -Yay! Thanks to you, we can rip off the movie idea!
Cool Hand -Spread, dammit!
fUp -Woo hoo, Anne Rice!
Other assorted body noises:
Ranma -Love those "Graphical screens"
Hype -Pine Sol does NOT go in your nose, mister dwarf.
Fab One -Good luck, honorable conpetitor.
Pantera -Take CHARGE...sheesh...
Midnight Ninja -Thanks for the offer for KiTSCH. PS-Happy 5th, Arkham!
Snazz -Too bad about your computer.
Pure Voltage -"Letting the inmates run the asylum" (tm) PV, RAiD
Nosferatu -So, how're those graveyards? PS-This isn't the vampire area
White Noise -Go away and stay away
Shadow -Same applies for you
My computer -If it wasn't for you, I wouldn't be writing this right now
My chair -Thanks for holding me up
The Old Oak Tree-I humbly thank you for providing me with shade over these
many long years, my old friend
The Nice Men -I like your white jackets. Are you going to put me in the
shirt with the really long sleeves again?
TsC -May you never, EVER, EVER revive.
Cheese -You're the best food on Earth (even better than Snapple)
TabNet -b0nk
Innate Malice -$150 bucks? He *MUST* be kidding...
Creideiki -Thank god you stopped modemming...
Drift -one word: WHY?
Everyone else -ha ha...i didn't greet you. Now i shall slap you with a fish.
A GREAT BIG WARNING TO:
Toxic Cockroach, Darkseid, Soul of Allusion, Archangel, and Visionary.
You guys have one more month of slothful relaxation, and if you don't release
anything after that... <b00t!>
I refuse to greet ACiD and iCE in these greets, as it's trendy, and grounds
for having stale bread thrown at you.
*** Any and all apologies to person or persons that i may have offended in
the writing of this newsletter or at any other time during my modemming
life, or even outside of it. I'm sure that the offense was well-deserved,
but if your ego needs straightening, we'll be happy to do it in a mildly
humiliating yet strangely satisfying way.
-Cthulu
MiSTiGRiS Founder
<EOF>
Begin5
Beatle's Greatle's
Beatle
46
<BOF>
■ Beatle's Lit for Imperial
■ Compiled August 14th 1994
■ Stuff..
Well, imperial died. Knew that would happen.
A few of these files appeared in one of their packs already.
But, I don't care, I am releasing them again, this time
with a little bit of color.
A few of these have music.
credits :
going home : lyrics - beatle
music - beatle, mark, bluck
little miss commited : lyrics - beatle
music - beatle
goodbye my dear : lyrics - beatle
music - beatle
johnny mcgill : lyrics - beatle
music - beatle
■ Anyways, thanks goes to..
bLUCK - For Being Bizzare
Chico - For not showing up to ANY fireworks meets
Magik Elvis - For being such a great guy
■ Words to...
James Joyce - Tough Break guy, but don't worry, it'll all
work out in the end. The world is not over.
■ Anyways, bye bye.. and don't do too many drugs.
Call my board and post on tabnet
interzone - 604-520-9519
[beatle]
<EOF>
Begin6
Programers note
Mavrik
17
<BOF>
Welcome to Kithe, the official newsletter of Mistigris. At first
this was just going to be a text file, like an .NFO file, but we decided to
spice it up a bit, and then people started adding articles, and letters,
and it kinda looks alot like an Emag now. This is just the first version of
Kithe, and the scrolling can be kinda slow in some of the bigger articles,
but remember there's a page down/up key if it gets too slow. This will be
fixed in the next version, which is already being worked on.
Also included in this month's Kithe is a small 6o4 lit 'zine called
Pinion that Cthulu of Mistigris, and Magik Elvis write. I have included
the four issue's of it in Kithe on Cthulu's request. Well, thats all for
now.. hope the scrolling isnt too annoying on those big articls =) l8r
-Mavrik [MiSTiGRiS]
Kithe programmer
<EOF>