home
***
CD-ROM
|
disk
|
FTP
|
other
***
search
/
Monster Media 1993 #2
/
Image.iso
/
magazine
/
rah9307r.zip
/
7
< prev
next >
Wrap
Text File
|
1993-07-01
|
4KB
|
184 lines
DaffyNition Taglines (M-Z)
compiled by Rob Nykvist (Theodore, AL)
MAD: Affected with a high degree of intellectual independence...
Maintenance-free: When it breaks, it can't be fixed...
Maniac: An early computer built by nuts...
Marriage: A sentence, not a word...
Marriage: The mourning after the knot before...
Masturbation: The human version of AUTOEXEC...BAT
Medical Staff: Doctor's cane...
Memory dump: Amnesia...
Microwave: Signal from a friendly micro...
Microwave: Wave from a midget...
Minor Operation: Coal digging...
Misfortune: The kind of fortune that never misses...
Mistress: Something between a mister and a mattress...
Mixed Doubles: Renee Richard and Martina Navratolova...
Mobile: [Mo-BEEL'] -n... Cultural center of the Universe...
Modem: How a Southerner asks for seconds...
Mondays: The potholes in the road of life...
Morbid: Higher offer...
Multitasking: Screwing up several things at once...
Newsflash: Headless body found in topless bar...
Nitrate: Cheaper than a day rate...
Node: Was aware of...
Nostalgia: The good old days multiplied by a bad memory...
Nymphomaniac: A girl that can only count up to sex...
Organic: Musical...
Outpatient: Person who has fainted...
Oxymoron: One who has used too much acne goo...
Papsmear: Fatherhood test...
Paranoia: Believing this tagline is written about you...
Parking lot: A place where arguments start from scratch...
Parking space: An area that vanishes as you make a U-Turn...
PEBKAC: Problem Exists Between Keyboard And Chair...
Pedestrian: Someone who found a place to park...
Pelvis: Cousin of Elvis...
Perot: (A)bort (Q)uit (E)nd (T)erminate...
Pessimist: An optimist with experience...
PETA: People for the Eating of Tasty Animals...
Peter Pan: A washbasin in a house of ill repute...
Petting: A study in anatomy in braille...
Pickle: A cucumber soured by a jarring experience...
Postoperative: Letter carrier...
Procastinator: A fishing expert, gifted at casting lures...
Prostate: Flat on your back...
Protein: In favor of young people...
Prune Juice: The breakfast for Runers...
Psychoceramics: The study of Crackpots...
Purranoia: The fear that your cat is up to something...
Purring: Sound of a cat manufacturing cuteness...
Purrpetual: Everlasting love for domesticated felines...
Purrpetual motion: A kitty playing...
Purrson: A male kitty...
Purrverse: Poem about a strange kitty...
Pussability: A surprised kitty's "BOING..."
Pussy Whip: The dessert topping for cats...
Recovery Room: Place to do upholestry...
Rectum: Dang near killed him...
Redundancy: An air bag in a politician's car...
Rheumatic: Amourous...
Rubber band: Flexible musicians...
Secretion: Hiding something...
Seizure: Roman emperor...
Semiconductor: Part-time band leader...
Serology: Study of knighthood...
Sit In: When you sit down to stand up for your rights...
Skydiver: A guy whose talks fall flat...
Soviet spy-dancer: A ballet ruse...
Stack Error: Lost on a cluttered desk...
Stack Overflow: Too many pancakes...
Tablet: A small table...
Elephone: How elephants call home...
Terminal glare: A look that kills...
Terminal Illness: Getting sick at the airport...
Terror: A female Klingon with PMS...
Three stages of Sex: Tri Weekly, Try Weekly and Try Weakly...
Trojan: Storage device for replicating codes...
Tumor: More than one...
Urine: Opposite of "You're Out..."
Valorus: Large animal vit tusks; lives in vater...
Varicose: Near by...
Varicose Veins: Veins very close to each other...
Vein: Conceited...
Wedding rings: The world's smallest handcuffs...
WOMEN.ZIP: A great program, but it doesn't come with
documentation...
WOMAN.ZIP: Great Shareware, but be careful of viruses...
ZMODEM: Big bits, Soft blocks, Tighter ASCII... {RAH}
---------------------------------------------------------------------
Said by my girlfriend just prior to her vacation to Mexico:
"I Have to be careful what I drink down there
because they have orgasms in the water."
Forget Spring Water, let's bottle some Mexican water.
submitted by: Christopher Boerma <cboerm48@Calvin.EDU>